


Debased Boarding School Girls

by schillingklaus



Category: Zoey 101
Genre: Horror, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-29
Updated: 2013-05-29
Packaged: 2013-10-17 06:24:36
Rating: T
Chapters: 1
Words: 187,272
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/9338270/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1522793/schillingklaus
Summary: Zoey Brooks and her equally ambitious friends are new to PCA. They figure step by step that they are just tools of a board of greedy sponsors. Each girl reacts differently to the gradual revelations. The story is told by the ghost of a former student who sees Zoey as a last hope for a school sinking in a swamp of greed, opportunism, and naivity.





	Debased Boarding School Girls

**Debased Boarding School Girls**

* * *

**Klaus Schilling**

* * *

**Rating**

PG-13

* * *

**Disclaimer**

This is a derivative work of _Nickelodeon_ shows and other subsequently specified quoted and paraphrased works of art I don't own.

* * *

**Abstract**

The girls of Pacific Coast Academy turn aware of the reasons for coeducation at their school, and they react in various manners.

* * *

**Synopsis**

* * *

**Genres**

Horror, Supernatural, Mystery, Spritual, Family, Friendship, Science Fiction, Fluff, et alii

* * *

**Fandoms**

The story occurs in the identified **universe** of a huge variety of current or past live action shows and movies produced for _Nickelodeon_ channel, including, but not restricted to, _Victorious_, _Zoey 101_, _The iCarly Show_, _Drake & Josh_, _How To Rock_, _Bigtime Rush_, _Unfabulous_, _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_, _True Jackson VP_, _Supah Ninjas_, _House Of Anubis_, _Just Jordan_, _Fred The Show_, _Marvin Marvin_, _Wendell And Vinnie_ … and makes heavy use of a variety of members of their casts:

* * *

**Prerequisites**

Knowledge of as many _Nickelodeon_ live action fandoms as possible, especially _Zoey 101_, is truly appreciated, but, by design, rudimentary knowledge of the main characters and plot lines, as taught by the corresponding _Wikipedia_ pages, is sufficient.

* * *

**Timeline**

The narration starts in summer 2004.

The following indicates which episodes, season, and movies are supposed to be set in which academic year:

* * *

**2003/04**

_Drake & Josh_: Season 1, Season 2 until _Little Diva_

* * *

**2004/05**

_Drake & Josh_: rest of Season 2, Season 3 until _Helen__'__s Surgery_; _Zoey 101_: Season 1; _Unfabulous_ season one and two, partially a dream of Addie Singer; _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: Season 1 and 2, partly as a dream of Jennifer Mosely

* * *

**2005/06**

_Drake & Josh_: rest of Season 3; _Fairly Odd Movie_as a dream of Drake Parker as Timothy Turner; _Zoey 101_: Season 2; _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: Season 3;_Unfabulous_, season three; _Unfabulous_:_Talent Show_ is supposed to be a dream of Addie Singer

* * *

**2006/07**

_Zoey 101_: Season 3 until _Chase's Grandma_; _Just Jordan_: Season 1; _The Last Day Of Summer_; _Shredderman Rules!_; _Star And Stella Save The World_ as a dream of Stella Rivera alias the same actress's anonymous cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Surprise_; _Drake & Josh_: Season 4 as a dream of Megan Parker;_Just Jordan_: Season 1;

* * *

**2007/08**

_The iCarly Show_: Season 1; _Just Jordan_: Season 2; _Victorious_ as a dream of Lola Martinez alias Tori Vega dream of Lola Martinez alias Tori Vega; _Spectacular!_ as a dream of Tammi Dyson alias Lola Martinez Tyson alias Lola Martinez; _Zoey 101_: rest of season 3 and season 4 as a dream of Zoey Brooks

* * *

**2008/09**

_The iCarly Show_: Season 2 until _iRocked The Vote_; _Best Player_ as a dream of Quincy Johnson alias Spencer Shay; _The iCarly Show_: Rest of season 2 and later seasons as a dream by Carly Shay _True Jackson VP_: Season 1 until _True Wedding_, _The House Of Anubis_ as a dream of Nina alias Dakota North; _Fred The Show_ as a dream of Fredrick Ficklehorn from _The iCarly Show_: _iMeet Fred_

* * *

**2009/10**

_Bigtime Rush_: Season 1; ; _True Jackson VP_: Season 1 since _Back To School_, Season 2 until _True Love_; _The Troop_ as a dream of Haley Steele.

* * *

**2010/11**

_Bigtime Rush_: Season 2; _Bigtime Rush_: season 3 and later as a dream of Kendall Knight; _Bucket & Skinner__'__s Epic Adventures_

* * *

**2011/2012**

_How To Rock_;_Supah Ninjas_: Season 1

* * *

**2012/2013**

_Marvin Marvin_; _Wendell And Vinnie_ as a nightmare of Spencer Shay;_Supah Ninjas_: Season 2

* * *

**Warning**

**_"_**  
The story is exclusively based on my interpretation of the used characters and my conspiracy theories concerning of what is said between the lines.

This is not necesssarily in agreement — probably even in stark contrast — with the intentions of the producers and authors of the originals it is based on. Readers sticking to a literalist canon view are not supposed to be able to make any sense of my stories.  
**_"_**

* * *

**Summary**

In 2004, renowned Californian boarding school Pacific Coast Academy turns coeducational. Among the first female students, there is Zoey Brooks, a blond Mary Sue. The ghost of a long since deceased student of this school watches this girl and her female pals during the following three years. He notices that Zoey is the last hope for Pacific Coast Academy, and he tries thereupon, bt the way of a day dream, to hint her towards understanding the system running this educational institution. All girls come to Pacific Coast Academy with dreams on their own, but they are really but a tool of the boys, who in turn are just marionettes of the forces running this school: The sponsors, the alumni, and the executive board. All of them are following selfish interests and exhibit dubious morals. The reactions to the threads imposed upon them by the rulers of Pacific Coast Academy differ greatly from girl to girl. Likewise, the girls are characterised by various degrees of opportunism. The destiny of Pacific Coast Academy is thus at stake, depending on whether spiritualism or opportunism prevail.

**Couples** include: Zoey Brooks / Olivary Biallo — a guest from _Zoey 101_: _School Dance_; Dana Cruz / Logan Reese; Nicole Bristow / Nicholas Webber — a guest from _Zoey 101_: _School Dance_;Quinn Pensky / Eric Blonowitz; Lola Martinez / Drake Parker; Chase Matthews / Addie Singer; Michael Barret / Wendy — a guest from _Drake & Josh_: _Number One Fan_; Stacey Dillsen / Josh Nichols; Dustin Brooks / Stella Rivera — from _Star And Stella Save The World_; Trina Vega / Vincent Blake; Coco Wexler / Joe The Mechanic — from _Zoey 101_:

* * *

**Acknowledgments**

Some passages of the story are written for various prompts of _LiveJournal_-Community _Taming The Muse_: _Under The Table_ (cf. 25:2!); _Maelstrom_ (cf. 6:2:1!);

The title and part of the concept is vastly inspired by _ABC_ production _Desperate Housewives_ and — even a bit more — its successor _Devious Maids_ — now owned by a different broadcasting corporation or production set.

The following segments have been written for prompts from _LiveJournal_-Community _30 Dreams_:

_kiss_ (cf. 6:2:3!); _hug_ (cf. 15:4!); _touck/caress_ (cf. 20:4:2!); _vanilla;flavour_ (cf. 10:5!); _rose;flower_ (cf. 17:4:4!); _awake; asleep_ (cf. 10:8:1!); _purple; colour_ (cf. 16:5:3:2!); _disjointed_ (cf. 26:2:9!); _haunting_ (cf. 15!); _alluring_( cf. 1:3!); _sweet melody_ (cf. 9:4!); _passion_ (cf. 29:3:2!); _drowning; falling_ (cf. 6:2:1!); _sleepwalking; sleep talking_ (cf. 7:4!); _night; stars; moon_ (cf. 10:4!); _white dragon_ (cf. 14:3:1!); _strawberries; fruit_ (cf. 8:3:1!); _treasure hunt_ (cf. 18:3:4!); _talking to "God" (God being open to interpretation!)_ (cf. 30:3!); _endless corridor_ (cf. 30:2:6!); _peace; chaos_ (cf. 15:3!); _flying without wings_ (cf. 23:2:5!); _anything is possible_ (cf. 14:1:6!); _running with unicorns_ (cf. 30:3:2!); _phoenix; rebirth_ (cf. 27:0:13!); _when it's cold outside_ (cf. 30:1:3!); _every moment I'm awake_ (cf. 12:4:4!); _spirits within_ (cf. 26:2:2:9!); _breathe_ (cf. 12:2!); _dream; nightmare_ (cf. 3:2:4!)

* * *

**Contents**

Chapter 1 Prologue  
1:1 Charles R. Galloway  
1:2 PCA Goes Coeducational  
1:3 Why PCA?  
1:3:1 Zoey Brooks  
1:3:2 Dana Cruz  
1:3:3 Nicole Bristow  
1:3:4 Quinn Pensky  
1:4 Dean Rivers  
1:5 Butler Hall  
Chapter 2 Start Into The New Life  
2:1 The First Day  
2:1:1 Arrivals On The Campus  
2:1:1:1 Zoey And Chase  
2:1:1:2 Rudeness Incarnate  
2:1:1:3 Looking For Cuteness  
2:1:1:4 Coco Wexler  
2:1:1:5 Quinn's Planned Arrival  
2:1:2 Arrival in Butler Hall  
2:1:2:1 New In 101  
2:1:2:2 Urinals  
2:1:2:3 Bed Choice  
2:1:2:4 Private Laboratory  
2:1:3 Basketball  
2:1:3:1 No Girls For The Team  
2:1:3:2 Girls' Reunion  
2:2 The Basketball Gender War  
2:2:1 Before The Match  
2:2:2 The Battle  
2:2:2:1 The Start  
2:2:2:2 Knocked Out  
2:2:2:3 Dana's Intervention  
2:2:2:4 A Close Call  
2:2:3 A Party After The Match  
2:3 Aftermath Of The Match  
2:3:1 Cheerio Squad  
2:3:2 Verdict About Girls In The Team  
Chapter 3 Quinnventions  
3:1 The Science Club  
3:1:1 Laboratory Classes And Teachers  
3:1:2 Science In The Past  
3:1:3 Equipment Providers  
3:1:4 Wayne Gilbert  
3:1:5 Consequences For Quinn  
3:2 Trading Rooms  
3:2:1 Zoey's First Week  
3:2:2 Emotions Of Food  
3:2:3 Moving In  
3:2:4 Nightmare  
3:3 The Next Day  
3:3:1 Before Breakfast  
3:3:2 Reporting  
3:3:3 Dustin As A Tutor  
3:3:4 Taunting Chase  
3:3:5 Zoey's Dilemma  
3:3:5:1 Debased Mary-Sue  
3:3:5:2 In Zoey's Dream  
3:3:6 Return To 101  
3:4 Dustin Earns Bucks  
3:4:1 Gummi Worm Blues  
3:4:2 Test Object  
3:4:3 Errand Boy  
3:5 The Campus Cinema  
Chapter 4 Espionage  
4:1 An Evening In The Lounge  
4:1:1 Confess Or Stress  
4:1:2 Kazu And His Delivery Boys  
4:1:2:1 Kazu And Sushi Rox  
4:1:2:2 Bars On The Campus  
4:1:2:3 Logan And Chase At Sushi Rox  
4:1:2:4 The Spy Bear  
4:1:3 Unwary Girls  
4:2 Leaking Informations  
4:2:1 Taunting  
4:2:2 Sick Logan  
4:2:3 Chase As Only Delivery Boy  
4:3 The Reaction Of The Girls  
4:3:1 Aftermath Of The Spy Bear Affair  
4:3:1:1 New Plush Bear  
4:4 Zoey To Take On Paris?  
4:5 Dangerous Cheerleader  
Chapter 5 Talent Show  
5:1 Animals On The Campus  
5:1:1 No Pets  
5:1:2 Wild Beasts  
5:1:3 Elvis  
5:2 Sibling Troubles  
5:2:1 Unhealthy Candy  
5:2:2 Academic Contests  
5:2:2:1 Our Teams  
5:2:2:2 Bullies  
5:2:2:3 Dustin's New Mentor  
5:3 What Are Your Talents?  
5:3:1 Girls' Talents  
5:3:2 Boys' talents  
5:4 Dustin's Failure  
5:5 Quinn's Medical Career  
5:5:1 Encounter With Doc Glazer  
5:5:2 Junior License  
5:6 Show Your Talent!  
5:6:1 The Performances  
5:6:2 The Winner  
5:7 Week Of Pranks  
5:7:1 Terrible Awakening  
5:7:2 The Culprits  
5:7:3 Revenge  
Chapter 6 Drama For Zoey  
6:1 Theatre At PCA  
6:1:1 Connections To Hollywood  
6:1:2 Future Superstars  
6:1:3 Jeff Garrett  
6:1:4 The Drama Club  
6:1:4:1 Renown  
6:1:4:2 Fletcher St. Troy  
6:2 Alien Girl Zorca  
6:2:1 Chase's Script  
6:2:2 Start Of The Auditions  
6:2:3 An Unexpected Turn  
6:3 How To Save The Play  
6:3:1 To Kiss Or To Kill  
6:3:2 Fletcher Says No  
6:4 Dustin's Cold  
6:4:1 Quinn's Treatment  
6:4:2 Eliminating Logan Reese  
6:4:3 Zoey Changes Her Mind  
6:4:4 Backfiring  
6:5 The Première Performance  
6:5:1 The Second Choice  
6:5:2 Improvisation  
6:5:3 Aftermath  
6:6 Dramatic Mark  
Chapter 7 Drake Parker  
7:1 The start Of Drake's Career  
7:2 Drake's Disease  
7:3 Impending Spring Fling  
7:3:1 The Organising Committee  
7:3:2 The Price Is High  
7:4 Sleep Withdrawal  
7:4:1 Reasons For The Research  
7:4:2 Dustin's Torture  
7:5 Raising Funds  
7:5:1 Ideas For Making Bucks  
7:5:2 Drake Shirts  
7:5:3 Asking For Permission  
7:5:3:1 No Clowns Allowed  
7:5:3:2 Garth Berman  
7:6 Stopping Quinn  
7:7 New Plans  
7:7:1 Megan Parker And Her Friends  
7:7:2 Negotiations  
7:8 The Concert On The Campus  
7:8:1 Drake's Arrival  
7:8:2 Greatest Party — Ever!  
7:8:3 Aftermath Of The Concert  
Chapter 8 The Apple Came Down  
8:1 Music For The Girls' Lounge  
8:2 Cue Pops And Backpacks  
8:3 Banapples  
8:3:1 Fruit Design  
8:3:2 The School Garden  
8:4 Got Lemons? Make Lemonade!  
8:4:1 Sad Nicole  
8:4:2 Many Adorers  
8:5 Drake's Enemy Number One  
8:5:1 The Creature  
8:5:2 Melinda And Joshua  
8:5:3 San Diego Science Fairs  
8:5:4 Mindy's True Feelings  
8:5:5 Linda Hayfer  
8:5:6 Carnapping And Honour Council  
8:5:7 Transfer To PCA  
8:6 Backpack Counterfeiter  
8:7 Sabotage  
8:8 Mindy's And Zoey's Reconciliation  
8:8:1 Megan's Next Intervention  
8:8:2 Caught At Night  
8:8:3 The Compromise  
Chapter 9 Career Week  
9:1 Basketball Team  
9:1:1 Team Morals  
9:1:2 Outfits For Atheletes And Cheerleaders  
9:1:3 Choreography  
9:1:4 The Opponents  
9:1:5 Faking Potato Crisps  
9:2 Job Project  
9:2:1 Bender's Announce  
9:2:2 Assessments  
9:2:3 Internships  
9:2:3:1 Nicole's Coffe Cart  
9:2:3:2 Dana's Trash Yard  
9:2:3:3 Quinn's Pear Store  
9:2:3:4 Zoey's Administration Office  
9:2:3:5 Chase's And Michael's Sushi Factory  
9:2:4 Reports  
9:3 Last Pep Rallye  
9:4 Sweet Victory  
Chapter 10 Middle School Ball  
10:1 Dances At PCA  
10:2 Computer's Choice  
10:2:1 The Announce  
10:2:2 The Program  
10:2:3 Filling In The Questionaries  
10:3 The Matches  
10:3:1 The Fake Girl  
10:3:2 Logan And Dana  
10:3:3 Nicole And Nicolas  
10:3:4 Misguided  
10:4 Dance The Night Away  
10:4:1 Dancing Floor  
10:4:2 Alone In The Moonlight  
10:4:3 Moon Goddess Zoë  
10:5 Coconut Flavoured  
10:6 Concluding Party  
10:7 Last Exams And Tutoring  
10:7:1 Under Pressure  
10:7:2 Zoey Teaches Half Of PCA  
10:7:2:1 Logan And Haikus  
10:7:2:2 Quinn And French For Vandals  
10:7:2:3 Chase And Genetics  
10:7:2:4 Michael And Algebra  
10:7:2:5 Dustin And Little Babies  
10:8 Trip To The Beach  
10:8:1 All Asleep  
10:8:2 Waking Up In Time  
10:9 Mystic Beach Party  
10:10 Graduation Celebration  
Chapter 11 Power Failure  
11:1 Returning To The Campus  
11:2 Summer Experiences  
11:2:1 Nicole's Weeks In Kansas  
11:2:2 Dana's Martial Camp  
11:2:3 Quinn's Summer Inventions  
11:2:4 Zoey's Recovery  
11:3 New Students  
11:3:1 Lola Martinez  
11:3:2 Vanessa Tayler  
11:3:3 Natasha Misa  
11:3:4 Maria Misa  
11:3:5 Evelyn Kwong  
11:4 Boarding Management  
11:4:1 Miss Burvich  
11:4:2 Quinn's Room Mate  
11:5 Entertainment Factory  
11:6 Camping Adventure  
11:6:1 Borrowing Tents  
11:6:2 In The Tents  
11:6:3 Looking For Dustin  
11:7 Improving The Power Supplies  
Chapter 12 Into The Fall  
12:1 Gaudeamus Igitur  
12:2 Sleep Apnea  
12:3 Time Capsule  
12:3:1 The Class Project  
12:4 Back To The Past  
12:4:1 The Students' Contributions  
12:4:1:1 Zoë Brooks  
12:4:1:2 Logan's Picture  
12:4:1:3 Chase's And Michael's Song  
12:4:1:4 Nicole's Outfit  
12:4:1:5 Dana's Smithereens  
12:4:1:6 Lola's Poor Excuse  
12:4:2 Into The Mud  
12:4:3 Chase's Remorses  
12:4:4 Truce Of Lola And Quinn  
12:5 Student Council Elections  
12:5:1 Student Council  
12:5:2 Announce And Canditates  
12:5:3 Bought Class Presidents  
12:5:4 Zoey Resigns  
12:5:5 The Last Man To Stand  
12:5:6 Other Class Presidents  
Chapter 13 Perverse Seductress  
13:1 Samantha Puckett  
13:1:1 The Evil Girl From Seattle  
13:1:2 Cleaning Up After Samantha  
13:1:3 Plastic Surgery  
13:2 Trisha Hits On Dustin  
13:3 The Stench Of A Skunk  
13:3:1 Stinky Surprise  
13:3:2 Feeble Attempts  
13:3:3 A Stink Against A Stinky Monster  
13:3:4 Splitting Forces  
13:3:5 First Failure  
13:3:6 A Tune Against The Skunk  
13:3:7 The Deodoriser  
13:4 Samantha Comes A Long Way  
13:4:1 Zoey Is Consternated  
13:4:2 Zoey Commands Chase  
13:4:3 Trisha Trades Dustin For Chase  
13:4:4 Fits Of Jealousy  
13:4:5 Megan Strikes Again  
13:5 Zoey Spares Trisha  
13:5:1 Dustin Rues The Day  
13:5:2 Breaking Trisha And Chase  
Chapter 14 Nerds And Robots  
14:1 Girls For The Science Club  
14:1:1 Evelyn Kwong Conquers Fire Wire  
14:1:2 The Reforms  
14:1:3 Discovery Of The Abuse  
14:1:3:1 Quinn And Mindy Join The Stingray Scientists  
14:1:4 Irregularities In The Archives  
14:1:5 Action Figures And Weird Dice  
14:1:6 New Administration Of The Science Club  
14:2 Stingray Droid Factory  
14:2:1 The Quinnterruptor  
14:3 A Martial Training Robot  
14:3:1 Mr. Takato  
14:3:2 Constructing Yamamoto  
14:3:3 Invisible Ninja  
Chapter 15 Fake Spook  
15:1 Halloween Party  
15:2 Monique Chaumont At PCA  
15:2:1 A Surprising Appearance  
15:2:2 Disguises  
15:2:2:1 Zoey as Marilyn Monroe  
15:2:2:2 Nicole As Dorothy Of Oz  
15:2:2:3 David Bender As A Dummy  
15:2:2:4 Quinn As Einstein  
15:2:2:5 Mummy Chaos  
15:2:2:6 Dana As Bigfoot  
15:2:2:7 Michael The Zombie  
15:2:2:8 Chase — Sorcerer Or Vampire?  
15:2:2:9 Lion, Tin Man, And Scarecrow  
15:2:3 Into The Tunnels  
15:2:4 Legion Of The Undead  
15:3 Chaos Breaks Loose  
15:3:1 Dissuading Nicole  
15:3:2 The Conquest Of Oz  
15:3:3 Valiant Witch Slayers  
15:4 All Hallows' Day  
15:4:1 Broken Dreams  
15:4:2 Nicole's Questions  
15:4:3 In The Administrational Office  
15:4:4 In The Lounge Of Brenner Hall  
Chapter 16 He Says — She Says  
16:1 The Chase And Michael Show  
16:1:1 Cartoon Factory  
16:1:2 A Devastating Start  
16:1:3 Logan's And Zoey's Arguments  
16:1:4 Change Of The Critique  
16:2 Hypnosis  
16:2:1 Nicole's Problem  
16:2:2 Dana's Problem  
16:2:3 Quinn's Plan: Mesmerising The Troubled Girls  
16:2:4 Nicole's Trance  
16:2:5 Dana's Trance  
16:2:6 Unpleasant Results Of Hypnosis  
16:3 Dystopia On The Campus  
16:3:1 Student Wars  
16:3:2 A Lullaby The Masses  
16:4 The Big Battle  
16:4:1 Reaching The Warrior Bot Finals  
16:4:2 The Opponents  
16:4:2:1 Belleview  
16:4:2:2 James K. Polk  
16:4:2:3 The Umpire  
16:4:3 The Heat Is On  
16:4:4 The Age Of Win And Lose  
16:5 The New Chase And Michael Show  
16:5:1 A Technical Producer: Wayne Gilbert  
16:5:2 A Co-Moderator: Trisha Kirby  
16:5:2:1 Lame Skits  
16:5:2:2 Here Comes The Fun  
16:5:3 A Toon Artist: Maria Misa  
16:5:3:1 Software Problems  
16:5:3:2 Painter Girl  
16:5:3:3 Nevelocity Praises The Show  
Chapter 17 Mean Cheaters  
17:1 Musical Hypnosis  
17:2 When The Baldwins Come  
17:2:1 Womanising Lessons  
17:2:2 The Conspiracy Against Logan  
17:2:3 Looking For A Double Date  
17:3 Flirting Practice  
17:4 Honing Your Acting Skills  
17:4:1 Lola's Options  
17:4:2 The Birds And The Bees  
17:4:3 Lola's Tutor  
17:4:4 Date In The School Garden  
17:4:5 Zoey's Permit  
17:4:6 New Herbs  
17:4:7 Interrupting The Farce  
17:5 Jerk In The Fountain  
17:5:1 Dustin Learns Womanising  
17:5:2 Quinn's Trombone  
17:5:3 The Double Date  
17:6 The End Of Sushi Rox  
17:6:1 Blazing Tuna  
17:6:2 Ashes And Dust  
17:6:3 Fund Raising  
17:6:4 Evelyn's Aunt  
17:6:5 Negotiating The Future Of Sushi Rox  
Chapter 18 Gender Defenders  
18:1 Spring Break Ahead  
18:1:1 Various Options  
18:1:1:1 The Reese Summer Residence  
18:1:1:2 Four Girls Only  
18:1:1:3 Rock, Scissor, Paper  
18:1:1:4 The Fourth Boy  
18:1:2 College Hunt  
18:2 Stranded In Los Angeles  
18:2:1 The Wrong Plane For Megan  
18:2:2 Stuck In Los Angeles  
18:2:3 Megan Calls Zoey  
18:2:4 Confusion In The Plane  
18:2:5 Shopping At Wanko  
18:3 Fine Time In Santa Barbara  
18:3:1 The Trip In A Limousine  
18:3:2 The new Game Show  
18:3:3 Nightly Meeting  
18:3:4 Treasure Hunt  
18:3:5 Restyling Of A Nerd  
18:3:6 The Decider  
18:3:7 Hidden Cameras  
18:4 Milo At PCA  
18:4:1 The Global Positioning System  
18:4:2 Noticing The Mistake  
18:4:3 The Invisible Ninja Strikes  
Chapter 19 A new Home For A Peruvian Alpaca  
19:1 Michael Likes Vanessa  
19:2 Office Automation  
19:3 Otis  
19:3:1 A Depressed Alpaca  
19:4 A New Home For Quinn's Alpaca  
19:4:1 Wendy Gellar's Idea  
19:4:2 Faye Dunnaway  
19:5 Stable Relationship  
19:5:1 Otis Moves To Malibu  
19:5:2 Veterinary Sparks  
19:6 Stupid Bet  
19:6:1 Obsolete Letter  
19:6:1:1 Breaking The Bet  
19:6:2 The Bet Contract  
19:6:3 The Outcome  
19:6:4 Humiliated Boys  
19:6:5 Expanding The Market  
Chapter 20 Stubborn Boys  
20:1 Chicken Pox  
20:1:1 The Health System Of PCA  
20:1:2 Dustin's Chicken Pox  
20:2 Squirrel Tree  
20:2:1 The Problem With Te Girls' Rooftop  
20:2:2 Possible Solutions  
20:2:3 Ashley As An Alternative For Lola  
20:2:4 Redirecting Light And Squirrels  
20:2:5 Replanting An Old Tree  
20:3 Doc Nussbaum Intervenes  
20:3:1 Contracting The Chicken Pox  
20:3:2 Two Broken Hearts  
20:4 Uprooted  
20:4:1 Treehuggers  
20:4:2 About The Fish In The Lake  
Chapter 21 A Summer Of Storms  
21:1 Through The Summer Break  
21:1:1 Zoë Brooks  
21:1:2 Nicole  
21:1:3 Dana  
21:1:4 Quinn  
21:1:5 Lola  
21:2 New Students  
21:2:1 Stacey Dillsen  
21:2:2 Megan Parker  
21:2:3 Girl Power From Santa Clarita  
21:2:4 Trinidad Vega  
21:2:5 Lisa Perkins  
21:2:6 Adelaide Singer  
21:2:7 Stella Rivera  
21:3 Changes On The Campus  
21:3:1 The Status Of Sushi Rox  
21:3:2 The Yumburger Campaign  
21:3:3 Cooperation Of Blix Of Yumburger  
21:3:4 The Catering Staff  
21:3:5 New Blix Products  
21:4 Room Management  
Chapter 22 Yet Another Year At PCA  
22:1 Chaos Upon Arrival  
22:1:1 Chase and Trina  
22:1:2 Fight For The Single Bed  
22:1:3 Chase Runs Into Zoey  
22:1:4 Missing Dormitory Room  
22:1:5 Can't Sink Any Deeper  
22:1:6 Too Much Pepper  
22:1:7 Nicole Spoils The Plan  
22:1:8 Dustin Likes Stella  
22:2 Spreading Zoey's Decision  
22:2:1 Zoey Turns Angry  
22:2:2 Delayed Plans  
22:2:3 Dustin Runs Into Zoey  
22:2:4 Brute End Of A Crush  
22:2:5 Quinn's New Room Mates  
22:2:6 Lola And Zoey Trade Rooms  
22:2:7 Zoey's World Goes Dark  
22:3 Extracurricular Activities  
22:3:1 Graphic Novels  
22:3:2 Basketball Blues  
Chapter 23 Coco's Demise  
23:1 The Bounty  
23:1:1 Training Machine  
23:1:2 Terrence Bo And Basketball  
23:1:3 Looking For A Star  
23:1:4 Lisa For Yumburger  
23:1:5 New Training Units  
23:1:6 Cheerleading  
23:2 Love And Abuse  
23:2:1 Coco Gets Trashed Again  
23:2:2 Dustin Loves Stella  
23:2:3 More Drama  
23:2:4 A New Boyfriend For Coco?  
23:2:5 Addie Gets Chased  
23:2:5:1 Overworked  
23:2:6 Embarrassing Awakening  
23:2:6:1 Winged Hearts  
23:2:7 Auditioning  
23:2:8 The Bald And The Not-So-Beautiful  
23:2:9 Trisha Fixes Coco  
23:2:9:1 The Pork Club  
23:2:9:2 Coco Gets Greased  
Chapter 24 Quinn Resets The Mark  
24:1 The Tall Blond Rake  
24:1:1 Jake Crandle At PCA  
24:1:2 Jake And Cotton Swabs  
24:1:3 Jake Runs Into Zoë  
24:1:4 Screaming Lola  
24:1:5 Start Spreading The News  
24:2 A Surprise Gift  
24:2:1 The Second Anniversary Of Quinn And Mark  
24:2:2 More Bacteria  
24:2:3 Jealous Quinn  
24:2:4 Quinn Looks For Answers  
24:2:5 Agent Stella  
24:2:5:1 Splitting Tasks  
24:2:5:2 Snooping Mark And Maria  
24:2:5:3 Two Room Mates — One Date  
24:2:5:4 One Rake And Two Girls  
24:2:6 End Of The Quarantine  
24:2:6:1 Cal Meacham Interferes  
24:2:6:2 No Danger  
24:2:6:3 Quinn Is Free  
24:3 The Right Chemistry  
24:3:1 Zoey's Hate Subject  
24:3:2 Worst Exam — Ever  
24:3:3 Jennifer's Idea  
24:3:4 Claire's Intervention  
24:3:5 Tailor Made  
Chapter 25 Football Scandal  
25:1 A Great Football Team  
25:1:1 The Rise Of Vincent Blake  
25:1:2 Other Players  
25:1:3 The Team Medic  
25:1:4 Doping At PCA  
25:1:5 In Flagrante Delicto  
25:2 Moon Bars  
25:2:1 Unhealthy Snacks  
25:2:2 A Stubborn Headmaster  
25:2:3 Secret Deals  
25:2:4 Poor Taste  
25:2:5 Spicing Up  
25:2:6 Ashley Blackmails Chase  
25:2:7 Feeding The Jocks  
25:2:8 Interesting Vomit  
25:2:9 Vince Steps Back  
25:2:10 Handmade Candy Bars  
25:2:11 Save The Last Bar For Me  
25:2:12 The New Quarterback  
Chapter 26 Knocking Out  
26:1 The New Dormitory Adviser  
26:1:1 The Selection  
26:1:2 Marissa Benson  
26:2 Society Of The Silver Hammers  
26:2:1 Roaming Elders  
26:2:2 If I Was A Hammer  
26:2:2:1 Time Of The Year  
26:2:2:2 Zoey Brooks  
26:2:2:3 Lola  
26:2:2:4 Quinn  
26:2:2:5 Stacey  
26:2:2:6 Chase  
26:2:2:7 Michael  
26:2:2:8 Lisa Perkins  
26:2:2:9 Fire Wire  
26:2:2:10 Vince  
26:2:2:11 Dana Cruz  
26:2:2:12 Nicole Bristow  
26:2:3 Mark And Maria  
26:2:4 Vanessa Tayler  
26:2:5 Knocking On The Heaven's Door  
26:2:6 Postulancy  
26:2:7 The Loganites  
26:2:8 Slave Jobs  
26:2:9 The Decimation  
26:2:10 Give Me Moon Light  
26:2:11 Beautiful Dreamers  
Chapter 27 Redstone Gulch

27:0:12 Freddie Comes To PCA  
27:0:13 Reviving The Web Show 27:1 Kisses And Apples  
27:1:1 Statistics For Dummies  
27:1:2 Lola's Theorem  
27:1:3 Banapples Revisited  
27:2 Mean Teacher Hodges  
27:2:1 Economy Classes  
27:2:2 The Legend  
27:2:3 A Rediscovery?  
27:2:4 The Guide  
Chapter 28 Chaos At PCA  
28:1 The Trip Into The Canyon  
28:1:1 Last Instructions  
28:1:2 In The Desert You Can Remember Your Name  
28:1:3 Unearthed  
28:1:3:1 The Right Spot  
28:1:3:2 Start Of The Web Session  
28:1:3:3 My Amulet  
28:1:3:4 Time To Return  
28:1:3:5 The Green Tornado  
28:2 Stingray Wrestlers  
28:2:1 The Team  
28:2:2 Regionals  
28:3 Fantasy Wrestling Game  
28:3:1 The Concept Of Fantasy Sports Games  
28:3:2 Nevel Amadeus Papperman  
28:3:3 The Introduction Of Nevel  
Chapter 29 The Pain Goes On  
29:1 Zoey As A Wrestling Amazon  
29:1:1 Separating Unruly Kids  
29:1:2 Zoey's Training  
29:2 The Broadcast Of The Event  
29:2:1 The Colour Commentator  
29:2:2 The Man Behind The Camera  
29:3 The Situation Looks Suspicious  
29:3:1 Nevel Meets Zoey  
29:3:2 Skippy's Confessions  
29:4 The Baby Butt  
29:5 Mean Vendor Machine  
29:5:1 Doodlecake Blues  
29:5:2 Samantha's Intervention  
29:5:3 Totally Terry  
29:5:4 The Hair Needle  
29:5:5 Analysing The Microchip  
Chapter 30 The Final Countdown  
30:1 The Birthday Party  
30:1:1 Chase And His Grandmother  
30:1:2 Planning  
30:1:3 Unhappy Birthday, Chase!  
30:2 Talents  
30:2:1 Dustin's Plan  
30:2:2 An Improved And Upgraded Trick  
30:2:3 Blackmailing Rivers  
30:2:4 We've Got A Baby  
30:2:5 Jadie Hawthorne  
30:2:6 Dream Of The Hallways  
30:3 Released  
30:3:1 Dies Iræ  
30:3:2 The Wild Hunt

* * *

**Chapter 1 Prologue**

* * *

**1:1 Charles R. Galloway**

Hello!

My name is Galloway … **Charles R. Galloway**.[1:1] I had once been a student at **Pacific Coast Academy**, _the most elitarian and illustrious boarding school of greater Los Angeles_. I am about to tell you some important story about this school, maybe even the story of stories, for a few years in the history summed up almost the whole past and prepared the whole future.

When I was a living resident of this boarding school, according to the flesh, videlixet back during the fifties of the twentieth century, the school was still fairly young. It had been founded immediately after second world war by a certain **Bradford**.[1:2]

I had seen that foundation father several times on our campus, but this was not so important, as I had faced the symbols and tools of his iron rule over Pacific Coast Academy on a daily base.

Bradford was very authoritarian and demanding, but he was fortunately not too often around in person. Even after his death, a monument in his likeness adorned the campus square, and it was sort of an object of idolatry for several generations of students.

Before the foundation of Pacific Coast Academy, its campus was occupied by some earlier school: **Pepperdyne Prep**.[1:3] Indeed, there was a lot of continuity between those educational institutions. In particular, most of the buildings standing even today on the campus had already existed in some form and under the same name during the earlier incarnation. You will learn about the differences between Pacific Coast Academy and Pepperdyne Prep later down the road.

This was especially the case for **Harry Schneider Libray**,[1:4] the main book storage that had been built at the beginning of the twentieth century. It was the oldest still standing building that had not gone through major reconstructions barring the occasional repainting. Like most buildings on the campus, it was named for one of the school's sponsors, in this case **Harry Schneider**, the lord of **Schneider's Bakery**: _California's greatest producer and vendor of pastry for over a century_.

The Schneiders had been one of the reliable constant sponsors of the school, but with the passage of the years, many others appeared and disappeared. Other important sponsors of the later history include **Pear Electronixs**, **Grizzly Industries**,[1:5]**Daka Shoes**,[1:6]**Qualitech**,[1:7] and **Blix Soft Drinks**.

I am going to return to the details later on, especially the significance of the most important people of the history of Pacific Coast Academy.

On the other hand, the story I have to tell occurred half a century later, when I was already long since dead.

But even as an incorporeal spirit it is my primary duty to serve mankind as a witness of those events, which should issue a warning.

Half a century after my untimely death, I was still not quite forgotten, but only vague legends and rumours about my life and times at Pacific Coast Academy abbounded, accompanied by equally stupid fables about my death that were passed along from one generation of students to the next, both by oral propaganda and by written statements in yearbooks. Only after about fifty years did my story get reevaluated by a bunch of students that got more or less involuntarily dragged into the forgotten past of the school.

Now it is time to start describing the situation and the circumstances at Pacific Coast Academy half a century passed my passage from the existence in flesh and blood to that in soul and spirit only.

* * *

**1:2 PCA Goes Coeducational**

We were writing the year of AD 2004 …

The sun was slowly climbing the hill chains at the fringe of the Pacific coast, and finally puring its first light on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

This was the start of a new academic year, and it was not just some arbitrary restart, but the school was about to go through some rigorous changes.

For the first time in the school's history, girls were admitted to studying side by side with the boys.

Still, the female students were clearly outnumbered, like one to five. This was expected to change during the following academic years, as each radical change needed its time to get accustomed to.

Four of the girls, all of them eighth graders, are in the centre of the inflict of the events of the start of Pacific Coast Academy into coeducation:

First, there is **Zoë Brooks**, generally known just as Zoey, a blond Mary Sue whose family had made it to southern California about ten years ago. But she was born in Lousiana,[1:8] in the outskirts of New Orleans, metropole of the grand old south. But she was by no means a southerner, because her heritage was definitely pointing to New England. She was often compared to some popular blond doll that had already fascinated generations of young girls.

The second girl was **Nicole Bristow**, a _bubbly bimbo wench from Kansas_. She was totally obsessed with cute boys, and thus she was of course all happy about being at a school with supposedly many of them. But, on te other hand, she was not really up to handle the situation, and she would face some hard challenges.

Next, **Dana Cruz** was a bully and arrogant tomboy of Mexican origin. Pulling punches was definitely not her style, no matter what. Her abrasive nature was unlikely to make her popular, but this was most likely compensated by the shere intimidation she would cause among her fellow students, boys and girls alike.

The quartet was completed by one **Quinn Pensky**, an Ashkenazi girl born and raised in Seattle, the metropole of the state of Washington. Her heritage — especially her father's line — was chock full of intellectuals that had contributed a lot to the progress of mankind, such as **Sigmund Freud**, **Franz Kafka**, and especially **Alam Greenspan**. She had inherited every bit of their genius and inspiration.

Before seeing how they met on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy for their first time, it is appropriate to see how they came to register as some of the first girls at this traditional and most respected yet hitherto boys-only school.

* * *

**1:3 Why PCA?**

* * *

**1:3:1 Zoey Brooks**

The most charming teenage blonde Zoey Brooks had hitherto been among some very popular and outstanding students at some district school in Carlsbad, San Diego County. She was the star of their athletic team and on several academic honour rolls.

Clearly, prep schools would have been proud of seeing her in their ranks.

The leading boarding school for girls used to be **Northridge**[1:9] in Los Angeles.

On the other hand, there had been a family tradition in favour of Pacific Coast Academy.

Zoey's uncle **Glazer Brooks**[1:10] was an alumnus of Pacific Coast Academy. Then he had studied at and graduated from **University Of California Los Angeles Medical School**. He was now a feelance medic in San Diego county, rushing from emergency case to emergency case and ripping off his unwary patients by the dozen.

Upon Glazer's recommendation, **Dustin Brooks**, _younger brother of Zoey_, had been sent to Pacific Coast Academy as well, and he had very soon become one of the most astonishing pupils of his grade. He was now starting his fourth grade, but was already competing regularly with middle school kids in many a respect.

Clearly, it was easier for dad **Robert Brooks**[1:11] to send both of his kids to the same prep school than splitting them apart.

Mom **Sophie Brooks**[1:12] was also glad that Zoey was now able to watch over Dustin a little bit. Alas, she did not expect that Zoey was often ready to go out of her way in order to protect Dustin.

Zoey was not sure what to expect from her switch to Pacific Coast Academy except a lot of fun: She had seen a video of it made by Dustin, and she loved the beach and the pools, and the boys, and the prospects of sharing a room and a breakfast and supper table with friends, and to get to know more new people in general.

Unlike their daughter, Robert and Sophie Brooks had got more concrete reasons for sending her to the most elitarian prep school of the country.

The teachers of Pacific Coast Academy were the best paid and most qualified of the whole of America.

The parents wanted to make sure that Zoey was going for a great career as a business manager or lawyer.

Zoey was not really sure about that. She was more interested in visual arts and in light sports. She had already designed Dustin's baby outfit in a fashionable manner, at least in some sense, and she was eager on doing something similar for her new friends upon finding some.

* * *

**1:3:2 Dana Cruz**

Dana was extremely athletic, and her goal had always been that of becoming a cheerleader and a supermodel. She was also excellent with team sports such as basket ball, but she was not really a team player of any sort.

Her parents had been worried because of the latter, and they thought that living at a school together with many other kids would make her a bit more caring.

But this would have worked the same way for just any boarding school. So why had it been Pacific Coast Academy, which was just opening itself to girls?

Well, Pacific Coast Academy had of course advertised a lot in order to atrract some female students that did not happen to be relatives and neighbours of the boys already living there, which had been Zoey's way to this school.

For reasons to be examined in increased depth later down the road, the school was especially hiring new cheerio girls, and this was exactly Dana's thing.

Many would say that cheerleading is not a tomboyish activity, but this did not matter, as, after all, it was most definitely a fairly hard sport that required a lot of training, too, no less than football or wrestling.

Of course, Dana was already thinking past high school time, and she was totally aware of the fact that Los Angels, twice host of the **Olympic Summer Games**, was not only the city of the big dreams displayed on the big screen, but also a city of sports.

There were big, successful, and well-sponsored teams of the most profitable sports of America, and they all needed cheerleaders in order to maintain their status.

Thus Dana was looking forward to being at the source and to impress her potential future employers as strongly as only possible.

Due to the increasing public importance of athletic events, especially in sports like American football, baseball, basketball, ice hockey, and wrestling, the sponsors of our school had always been interested in strong teams as carriers of commercials. This fact will be emphasised later on in detail.

* * *

**1:3:3 Nicole Bristow**

Life in Kansas was boring and pointless, at least in the eyes of Nicole Bristow, the daughter of the greatest sioftware vendor of the red states. She complained especially about the lame and ugly boys over there, and she felt like loose dirt drifting aimlessly in a gust or a gale.[1:13]

Likewise, Kansas did not offer much for her career.

Nicole was obsessed with cosmetics and hairstyling, and she dreamt of applying her skills to superstars from Hollywood. Therefore, Los Angeles was a good bet for her. And being one of a few girls among many — supposedly cute — boys made her feel even more excited.

But why did her parents, owners of the greatest juice vendor in Kansas,[1:14] send her far away to California? That was very easy to see: They were deadly annoyed by their daughter's stupid bimbo talk, and they wanted to get rid of her as fast as only possible, hoping that Nicole would learn that not everything was gold outside Kansas, either, even in the outskirts and suburbs of Hollywood.

Indeed, Nicole Bristow had been at Eastridge for over a year already when the news about the opening of Pacific Coast Academy for girls started drifting across the land. Most obviously, she had been excited by the prospects of sharing a campus with boys.

This, of course, was not a reason about which her dad approved of, and it would definitely rather have deterred him.

Well, while Bristow Juices was uncontested in Kansas, they were nothing but a tiny pebble in the raging flood of the nation wide — and later on world wide — soft drink market. Their main interest was that of finding business partners in the major urban areas, such as Los Angeles.

The greatest software giant at the Pacific Coast was no other than aforementioned Blix Soft Drinks, one of the nation wide most powerful players in the branch, and undeniable a very desirable senior partner for Bristow Juices's step out of the fog of middle eastern nowhere land into the flashing lights of the Californian market, lamps shining brightly both by day and by night.

Nicole was thus basically a tool for the Bristow's business plans. She was of course infinitely naïve and utterly unable to see the connection and to understand what was going on. Would she ever turn wary?

* * *

**1:3:4 Quinn Pensky**

It is now time to move on to the last girl in the quartet, geeky Quinn Pensky from Seattle.

We will doubtlessly see the mad scientist see in action somehat later down the road, with more or less pleasant side effects.

Quinn Pensky's goal was that of intellectual domination of mankind, and this had been the case since her fist year of elementary school. Before that, she had been just one little spoiled girl of Seattle's uptown society, running around with a pink tie in her hir and participating in pageants as a majorette.[1:15] She had often been deemed a spaz by her age sakes.[1:16]

Little wonder, Quinn had already spent elementary school at some expensive prep school in King County, and more precisely **Priorwood Prep**, [1:17]in the forrestal outskirts of Seattle.

So, what justified, or at least motivated, her switch from Priorwood Prep to Pacific Coast Academy? Of ourse, the answers were different for Quinn and her parents.

Quinn was of course looking forward to a career as a scientist.

And while Seattle — alias **the emerald city** — was not completely devoid of scientific experts, it was by no means to be considered one of the world's greatest research centres in physics, chemistry, or biology.

The situation was totally different, however about thousand miles to the south, in the big cities of California.

Quinn Pensky's main targets of interest were Stanford, Berkeley, and — on top of everything — the famous **Californian Centre For Technology**, hosted in Pasadena in the outskirts of Los Angeles.

For that very end, she was already keen on making contacts with the responsible people down there as early and as intensively as only possible. And one of the possible contacts was a guy studying now said intitute in Pasadena whom she had already met in person — albeit only en passant — in Seattle:

His name was not known by anyone, including Quinn, but he was awarded by the tween geek some kind of pseudonym: **Cal Meacham**.[1:18] The reason for this attribution was the fact that a radio scientist of that name was figured in one of Quinn Pensky's favourite science fiction novel, which she had learned by heart and whose scientific errors she liked to discuss with like-minded people — hard to find, but not impossible.

Later on, this anonymous scientist would actually proudly adopt Quinn's chosen attribute.

Quinn's business-oriented father Todd Pensky[1:19] imagined that his daughter would be able to make contacts with the rough world of business in California, adding some understanding for practice. Also, he was sure that life at a boarding school far away would teach his daughter the value of money, at least to some degree.

Quinn had often enough used to blow up and incinerate things with her experiments, such as dad's expensive car.[1:20]

Her mother **Sherry Pensky**,[1:21] on the other hand, was interested in getting Quinn involved in the daily routines of students at the boarding school. At home in Seattle, they were unable to get Quinn away from her books or experiments. They even had to push her meals through a cathole in her room door.

This leads to the question of the significance of science and technology at Pacific Coast Academy.

Clearly, the vicinity to Hollywood implied a strong influence of the big players of the media technology, especially aforementioned Pear Electronics. Alaso, special effect engineering was high in demand.

For this avail, the scientific laboratories of Pacific Coast Academy were very modern, and well equipped by sponsors like Pear, Qualitech, and Grizzly.

Given these circumstances, one should have expected a fertile ground for Quinn's career on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, but there were some obstacles.

* * *

**1:4 Dean Rivers**

The person in charge with the transition from a boys-only to a coweducational school was **Dean Carl Rivers**,[1:22] the headmaster of Pacific Coast Academy.

Of course there had always been such a person on the top of the local hierarchy, but the title of a dean had not been granted until after the war of Vietnam, and that was already past my life time. Until then, the headmasters were simply principals — just as it used to be the case at most schools.

It is important to consider that inspite of being the most visible ruler over the campus — at least in the eys of the students that got to run across him on a daily base, he was not the absolute boss, but forced to report back to the Bradfords, and to the board of the sponsors and the mighty lounge of the alumni. Some of those resided in the Los Angeles area, but many of them were spread across the whole planet earth. Dean Rivers himself was one of the alumni, and his encounters with former fellow graduates had not always been pleasant, because he had always been a bit arrogant and biased towards most of them, especially during his teenage time.[1:23]

Carl Rivers had been in his office for five years, and he was not up to retiring, although the upcoming changes would certainly cause him a lot of troubles.

But his family was certainly a worse problem for the headmaster. The dean was married with two children: Son **Lance Rivers**[1:24] was a jerkish high school student at Pacific Coast Academy. He was definitely no good, and he would not have been kept at this elitarian school, had his father not been the headmaster of this illustrious educational institution.

The dean had also got a married daughter,[1:25] who had graduated a few years ago, but obviously not from boys-only Pacific Coast Academy. Indeed, she had studied at aforementioned Northridge Prep School For Girls.

The worst of the whole family was of course Tipper Rivers,[1:26] the sociopathic wife of the dean. She ruined his mood on a daily base by shouting at him over and over again for no good reason.

So, why had Carl Rivers married Tipper in the first place, and why had they not yet separated?

It had certainly not been a love based marriage, but rather to do with money and blackmailing. Tipper's family owned legally mostr of the estate and many other belongings of the headmaster, and a divorce or even an informal separation would have cut him off of most of it.

During college, the headmaster had started being addicted to video games, and he still was by now.[1:27] Back then, those had been found almost only in the arcades, long before you had got your mobile telecommunication devices that allowed you to play them everywhere, including the toilet breaks during office time. And ever since, he had been blackmailed and tormented by Tipper.

Carl Rivers had not been the only headmanster, dean, or principal of Pacific Coast Academy in a similar situation. Rather, those leading figures of the local school administration had always been typically like that.

Our headmasters had always been — after alll — not just employees of the school, but also involved in the world of business, and that was not always for the better of the students and staff members. We will explore later down the road how this dependencies affected life and work at Pacific Coast Academy especially during the rule of Carl Rivers. For now, it suffices to say that his inauguration had not only been based on his academic credentials and his achievements in his previous career, but also essentially for economic reason, and there he would have been nothing without the hypocritical backup of his wife's family.

* * *

**1:5 Butler Hall**

So, while we are now aware of the reasons for those four girls to be bound for the place that will be in the centre of their lives' next years, we will slowly approach the point where they meet for the first time in order to spend their next months under one and the same roof.

The latter is now the target of our closer examinations.

The hall assigned to the girls of all grades — one hall was enough for the time being — was **Butler Hall**,[1:28] a nice albeit not really new building not far from the centre of the campus. But why was it named this way?

As was the case with Harry Schneider Library, dormitory halls were named for a sponsor or alumnus who had contributed significantly to its construction or upgrade.

In some cases, a random sponsor or alumnus that had contributed a lot to the school or its precursor in general was awarded with a building named for him, although there was no direct connection between the building and its godfather.

So, who was **Mr. Butler**?

Really, the Butler family had been connected with the history of Pacific Coast Academy for several generations, and this had already been the case during my life time.

In fact, I had known one Butler loosely in person, he had graduated when I had been still at middle school.

But the name got only assigned to said dormitory way later, after the insane war of Vietnam, and the decision had not been a straightforward one at all.

The war had taken its toll, also at Pacific Coast Academy.

Generally, the board had decided to honour the war veterans among our alumni, probably under public pressure, but much to the liking of overlord **Leo Bradford**.[1:29]

The latter was definitely a supporter of a hard line of politics, and he would thereafter express his disgust about how the American interests in south east asia had been shamelessly betrayed by inept politicians back at home.

There was little doubt left that the choice of the name had been highly politically motivated.

But there had also been economical interests, although those used to go hand in hand, especially in the case of the Bradford family, as I had duly experienced back in my life time.

Now everything was rigged and ready for the arrival of the new students — and the return of the established ones — for the new academic year.

* * *

**Chapter 2 Start Into The New Life**

* * *

**2:1 The First Day**

* * *

**2:1:1 Arrivals On The Campus**

* * *

**2:1:1:1 Zoey And Chase**

Robert Brooks had just halted his care on the parking lot of the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, more precisely, the student drop site.

There was a different lot for the teachers and officials.

But that is besides the point, at least for now.

Dustin and Zoey left the car after some exciting trip.

The young boy had had some problems with his bladder — and also with a few killer squirrels roaming the dunes.

Beasts of that size were not uncommon on our campus, although definitely not welcome.

But this will be seen in detail further down the road.

Robert Brooks was apparently not at ease, now that he was about to drop both of his kids. He expressed how anxious he had been when dropping Dustin for the first time. And now he was even more excited, because this school had hitherto been reserved for boys, which made Zoey's first little step on the campus still a huge step for womankind.

In this momnt, one of the careless middle school kids passed by, riding his bicycle. The guy's name was **Chase Matthews**, and he was characterised by some bushy skull and other signs of lack of taste. Apparently, he was distracted by Zoey Brooks.

Well, it was to be expected that this sort of distraction would thereupon become increasingly common on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, as most boys were not yet accustomed to those girls, and they had been waiting for this moment like a withering plant in the desert missing the rain.

Chase Matthews was so utterly and completely unable to handle the new situation that he wrote the bike straight into some flag staff, thence losing his banlance and slipping off his brazen mount. Fortunately, he was wearing one of those bikers' helmets. This way, he was avoiding some more dangerous injuries, but he was by no means able to do without some impact that rendered him a bit dizzy.

Zoey Brooks offered to help him up.

Not having seen a girl in ages, Chase was a bit confused, maybe even more so than by the mere consequences of the collision. He demonstrated brilliantly that his brain had been slightly damaged by the impact, stating that he had been sent forth in order to fix the deranged flag staff. Then he held the thing aloft.

Of course, the staff had only been damaged by the collision with Chase, and no earlier, so Chase must have been a fool or a liar. He continued talking like an utter dork and dweeb, as already indicated by his poor taste for hair styling. Anyways, as Zoey was in need of finding her way to her dormitory room, alias Butler Hall, Chase offered to take her right there.

Usually, Robert Brooks would have been more wary when letting Zoey walk away just with some stranger, especially a boy with bad manners. But he was too excited, and he needed to take care of little Dustin and his unhandy luggage, so he abused the occasion in order to drop his daughter for the time being and be able to concentrate on his son.

* * *

**2:1:1:2 Rudeness Incarnate**

Dana Cruz had made it to the campus on her own, and she needed no help with her luggage, but she was as new as all the other girls. So, how was she supposed to find her way to Butler Hall? That was really not so hard for her. She looked around, grabbed the next best freak, and shook him violently, making his mark and bone tremble like aspen leaves in a totnado. "Is this the way to Butler Hall? Show me the way to Butler Hall, or else …" She threatened to punch him through his jaw. "You better don't dare to tell me the wrong way, or else say your last prayers!"

**Nils Jacobsen**,[2:1] the intimidated freak, stammered a few words, pointing vaguely into the direction of Butler Hall.

Dana pushed him rudely into saome thorny shrubbery. "Freak! Never dare to cross my way again, will you?" She spat with disgust into his direction, and then she walked on right over to Butler Hall.

Abyone who had watched Dana's scene was probably terrified enough to inderstand that the abusive tomboy meant serious business, and it was better to stay out of her way as much as only possible.

And fortunately, Dana Cruz did find her dormitory room without further ado, or else a few more guys would have felt her anger … the hardest possible way.

* * *

**2:1:1:3 Looking For Cuteness**

Nicole Bristow was also dumped by her mother right at the campus entrance, because she had been talking too much, and of course her speech had been about the cute boys, the beach, the pool, … "Amd have I already mentioned all those cute boys?"

This was of course way too much for her mother to bear, and she walked staright back to the cab that had brought both of them from the airport to the campus entrance.

Nicole was now left with a heap of luggage, and she needed to get it somehow to Butler Hall, whose location she was not aware of as of yet. But of course the ditzy lass had already got some kind of plan. She walked up to the nearest cute boys, **Brad McClaren**[2:2] and **Darren Critter**.[2:3]

**_"_**  
Hey, you guys are so cute!

This school is so cool, you know:

The cute boys, the pools, the cute boys, …

But I need help to find Butler Hall, ansd you guys are the best guides ever!

Come on, I know that you are!  
**_"_**

But the boys were gone before Nicole had had the chance to finish her desperate and most annoying plea for help, certainly due to being scared by the ditzy wench's enervating talk. They left her alone with her suitcases in order to take cover somewhere on the campus. This did not mean that they feared girls in general … they had been waiting like hungry wolves for the arrival of girls at this school … but they were not able to handle girls like the bubbly lass from Kansas.

Nicole squealed: "Hey, you cuties can't walk away, we could have so much fun together." She sighed deeply. "Guys in Kansas are so uncomely and boring." And then she tried to run after the boys, but she was not speedy enough to catch them. Instead, she ran into some chubby woman of thirty years.

Fortunately, **Coco Wexler** — the lady run over by Nicole — served well as a cushion. But she dropped an open can of ravioli, spilling it all over the campus. Now she was notr only lying flat on the ground, with Nicole on top, but she needed to get more food from elsewhere. She asked Nicole for her name and introduced herself.

Nicole expressed being sorry, buy she was not strong enough to help Coco back onto her feet. Nevertheless, she tried hard doing so, but she onle achieved making her lie on her back instead of her belly. And of course, she tortured the already wretched woman with her bimbo talk about all the cute boys on the campus. "I need to find 101 Butler Hall. I live there."

Coco coughed. "That is good." She panted: "I am the new dormitory adviser of Butler Hall."

Nicole smiled: "So … you know your way over there?" She kept on struggling with Coco, but now she was knotting the legs of the dormitory adviser. "Oops!"

Coco did not know her way to Butler Hall, either.

But soon thereafter, **Kazu Park**,[2:4]_owner of_ **Sushi Rocks**, _a Japanese bar on the campus_, found the too wretched lumps of misery and called for reinforcements in order to guide the miserables to Butler Hall.

* * *

**2:1:1:4 Coco Wexler**

Dormitory advisers were responsible for the dormitory halls of the students. This trade had been around on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy for many a year.

But this time around, girls were finally admitted to this school, implying the necessity of a girl's dormitory adviser.

Coco Wexler was most definitely not one of the brightest stars on the nightly sky. She had dropped out of high school, like most kids of her environment, a settlement of caravans in Orange county, usually inhabitated by illegal migrants coming from Mexico.[2:5]

There was only one reason for Pacific Coast Academy to employ someone utterly incompetent and unqualified like Coco Wexler:

The lass was just plain dirt cheap.

And the school needed to save money, at least according to Leo Bradford who insisted in making the switch to coeducation as cheap as only possible.

So why had Coco even found out about this noble place and come to apply for it?

Basically, her boyfriend **Carl Bubba**[2:6] was responsible for this move. He was a reckless bully and jock with excessively bad manners. He was also employed at Pacific Coast Academy, and precisely as the coach of its pathetically weak baseball team. He also worked as a nightly security guard for storage halls and as a bouncer for clubs. Needless to say, he was also a high school dropout, and he treated his fiancé Coco badly.

But the latter was apparently unable to get away from him, as as she would never get away from her obnoxious addictions.

Carl Bubba had formerly worked as a private for the army, which made him predestined as a coach for athletic teams and bouncer for clubs. As a private, he had come to know the brother of Coco, a filthy drinker of some sort. He had been in military prison for some time for his unruly demeanour, and he was on and off out for parole. That's the only way he was able to see Coco.

Coco's sister **Evelyn Wexler**,[2:7] on the other hand, had made her way up from a plate washer in a dirty wayside pub to a chief cook in the leading establishments in Manhattan.

* * *

**2:1:1:5 Quinn's Planned Arrival**

A true Quinn Pensky was unable to refrain from making her very arrival at Pacific Coast Academy a scientific experiment. She had made plans for her way from the parking lot, where she had been kicked out by her aforementioned mother Sherry, over to Butler hall. She was carrying a laptop that had already registered topographical plans of the campus, compiled by using **Zaplook**,[2:8]_a popular interweb search engine including an advanced geographical information service_, ready for making it to the entrance of her dormitory room.

Her luggage was chock full with a complete laboratory for various fields of modern science: genetic engineering, nuclear reactors, information and automation technology, and on and on and on it went.

She had now carefully planned the optimal route from the drop site to the entrance of her assigned dormitory room, taking into account a variety of circumstances. She was even considering backdoors and fire ladders.

The first steps went perfectly. But was it possible for Quinn to plan out each and every step reliably in advance, which would be part and parcel of her dream of intellectual world domination?

There was a lot to do, and she needed the help of aforementioned Cal Meacham in oerder to improve and upgrade her research equipment during the following weeks. Then she would aim for the science fairs and also for the Nobel Prizes, if possible before the age of twenty!

* * *

**2:1:2 Arrival in Butler Hall**

* * *

**2:1:2:1 New In 101**

Chase had guided Zoey safely across the campus, explaining some of the facilities, such as the library which he supposed to contain books.

Now the blond Mary Sue had entered her new dormitory room, and she was pleased by its size and looks.

But there was a problem: Some old sandwich, decayed and mouldy, was lying in the refrigerator.

Chase was disgusted, and he threw it out of the window like a time bomb.

Then he discovered, upon Zoey's remark, that some kids had hung Chase's bicycle top a tree. He startled and ran away in order to fetch it from there.

Zoey Brooks wondered about the weird bushy dork, and now she was left alone in her dormitory room. Suddenly, she heard an insane bimbo scream.

* * *

**2:1:2:2 Urinals**

Zoey walked around in order to check the source of the squeals, and she found the culprit in the toilets across the corridor.

Nicole Bristow had been consternated, because the loo contained urinals, usually only found in boys' toilets.

Of course, Butler Hall had hitherto only served as a residence hall for boys, and thus these urinals had made sense. Apparently, the administration had not yet been able to revise and update the toilets for the new era of coeducation.

Nicole pretended to know everything about boys, but of course this was a lie. She wondered how it was possible for boys to sit on these urinals.

Zoey knew of course a lot more about boys, because she had got her little brother, Dustin. Now she hoped sincerely that Nicole did not have a brother, for the poor lad would screw up completely with a sister like Nicole. Now she wanted to return with Nicole to their common dormitory room.

* * *

**2:1:2:3 Bed Choice**

Most dormitory rooms at Pacific Coast Academy, including 101 Butler Hall, contained three beds, organised as two bunks and a single.

Zoey had chosen the single bed, while Nicole had settled with the bottom bunk because it was easy from there to watch the cute boys across the campus.

In this moment, Dana Cruz walked in, or, rather, she stomped in like a rhinoceros, ready to impale Nicole with her horn.

The reason was that Dana Cruz wanted the bottom bunk for herself, and she scared Nicole with her eyes to death, forcing her to give up on the already occupied bed and switching to the top bunk instead.

* * *

**2:1:2:4 Private Laboratory**

Quinn Pensky's program had guided her safely into her dormitory room, 102 Brenner Hall, and she was now about to unpack her luggage, and, more important than anything else, her scientific equipment.

Of course, Pacific Coast Academy had got its own science club with an associated laboratory, but it was not yet open on student drop day.

Quinn needed to sign up for said science club first, and, until she was accepted, she needed to dispose with her equioment in her own dormitory room.

Now there was the problem that her dormitory room was assigned to three girls, and not just for Quinn on her own.

And all that private secret laboratory took up an insane lot of space, making it impossible for anyone else to use said dormitory room.

For that avail, Quinn Pensky added a label to the door of her dormitory room, saying: "Attention! Life Danger!" And she was by absolutely no means exaggerating, given all the nuclear reactors, venomous mutant pets, laser beams, magnetic fields, and so on, which jammed her whole dormitory room.

Even Coco Wexler would be scared away to no end, and thus unable to control Quinn the way she was supposed to do in order to fulfill her duties as prescribed.

* * *

**2:1:3 Basketball**

* * *

**2:1:3:1 No Girls For The Team**

Zoey had fixed Nicole's tank top with a simple pair of scissors.

The bimbo wench from Kansas was totally impressed by the fashion skills of the blond Mary Sue.

And now the two friends walked the campus, trying to become more familiar with their new home.

Nicole was of course most interested in looking for cute boys on the campus.

Zoey was a whole lot more serious, and as she was interested in sports to some degree — albeit not in bully sports like football, she dragged Nicole along to the sport field. And she was pleased by the fact that there was a basketball team at Pacific Coast Academy, which made her want to join and display her impressive skills in this field.

Nicole was of course not a fan of basketball, as her favourite sport was shopping, which was not recognised as such by her pal.

The basketball players were all boys, which was not surprising, as girls were totally new here and probably had to find their way around the campus first. Anog them was aforementioned bushy dweeb Chase Matthews, along with his best pal, afro americal soul guy **Michael Barret**.

But Zoey's hopes were badly frustrated at whim by one of the guys throwing ballas through some rusty hoop. This was **Logan Reese**, an eighthgrader and stereotypical jerk of the worst sort. He was the totally spoiled son of **Malcolm Reese**[2:9], _one of the most influential producers in the Hollywood business_. Of course it was not an accident that this ultimate jerk was a student at Pacific Coast Academy:

Malcolm Reese was not only the father of said student, but also one of the leading sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy. Of course his expectations were not substantially different from those of other sponsors of the school, he expected to get as much money out of it as only possible. Just unlike the others, Malcolm was the one to produce commercials, and usually for the other sponsors.

After all, those seemed to be one big fraternity working hand in hand.

Logan was way too naïve to understand those connections, and he just wanted to display himself, especially his perfect Adonis-like body of which he was so endlessly proud. Of course he was happy about the start of coeducation, as this meant more girls to impress and to seduce in a shameless manner. He was totally sexist, like most appalling jerks, and he thought of girls like mere toys in order to confirm his obsession with his own body and demeanour. Needless to say, he treated them all like dirt, had always done, and would always do, until the looming ages of dystopia. And now he was opposed to girls in the basketball team, claiming that girls were only good for cheerleading.

Zoey was consternated, and she swore that she was able to gather a girl's team able to face the boys'.

Alas, Logan had said the truth:

His statement were not just his opinion fostered by his obsession with his own flesh, but it was the very rationale behind the board's decision.

Alas, in this moment, Zoey refused to see that this was the case, and she just deemed it as a deluded opinion of a teenage jerk, probably shared by some others as well. Now she was of course in charge with establishing a bunch of girls ready to face the challenge.

Needless to say, Nicole Bristow was a big catastrophe on the basketball field, but she did not really want to let her new best friend down on site, so she promised to give it at least a try.

* * *

**2:1:3:2 Girls' Reunion**

Zoey had gathered the girls from Butler Hall in order to recruit a middle school girls' team for basketball.

Unfortunately, only very few of the basketball girls knew how to play the game or had even ever heard about the game.

Quinn Pensky admitted to having blown up a basketball in one of her experiments with dangerous chemicals and hand-made explosives.

This was of course not exactly what Zoey had had in mind when asking for a team of decent basketball girls.

Dana Cruz could have easily crushed most of the boys' team with one hand tight to her back, but she preferred not to apply for Zoey's team, anyways. The reason was simply the one that she was perfectly content with being a cheerleader and leaving basketball to the boys. But she feigned that she did not want to get embarrassed by losing the basketball match against the boys' team.

Of course this was a plain white lie, for Dana never cared about the age of win and lose, she just used to fight her very own battle, crushing any kind of opponent left and right without caring about any kind of damage.

After all, Zoey was left with a team of five girls only, including herself.

Quinn and Nicole were equally joining, although they were absolutely incompetent.

The other girls were **Naoko Victoria**[2:10] and **Jacqueline Stevenson**,[2:11] the girls that had not made it into 102 Butler Hall because Quinn had attached the warning label. There is not yet much to say about those girls.

But, in any case, the gorls would have a hard time even preparing for the match: Their feet would hurt, and — especially in the case of Nicole Bristow — their hair would hurt even more.

* * *

**2:2 The Basketball Gender War**

* * *

**2:2:1 Before The Match**

Zoey Brooks had not been able to sleep a lot during the two days between daring to challenge the boys and the actual match. Now she was walking around the basketball field. And there she spotted her brother Dustin standing under the bleachers.

Dustin was not alonw, but accompanied by his room pal Jack Ross.[2:12] He explained why he had to hide in that place.

Many of the evil boys here did not allow him to cheer for the girls' team, threatening him with mutilation.

But Dustin was proud of his ister, and thus he wanted to cheer for her. Well, when he had been alone at Pacific Coast Academy, he had certainly missed Zoey badly. But the situation would change during the next months when Dustin would feel increasingly controlled by his watching big sister.

Zoey had not got much time to waste now, and she needed to talk once more to her team mates before the start of the match. But she thanked her brother for his well-meant support, inspite of his cowardice.

* * *

**2:2:2 The Battle**

* * *

**2:2:2:1 The Start**

The umpire of the match was **Coach Evan Ferguson**,[2:13] usually the coach of the basketball team. He had announced that this match was also part of the trials for the school team.

Logan Reese and some other jerks took it that they just needed to beat the girls' team in order to keep the PCA team boys-only for the rest of the season.

But things were not necessarily that simple.

Zoey was confident, not just because of Dustin's secret support, although she could not deny that it was going to be a lone match against five boys.

The boys around Logan Reese, Michael Barret, and Chase Matthews started really fast to string point after point.

The girls' team, on the other hand, was losing more and more self esteem and self control.

Especially Quinn Pensky and Nicole Bristow were absolute loseres who did not only miss every throw, but even fumbled and knocked themselves dow when trying to throw a ball.

Zoey tried her best, but she was doomed and lost for good. Yet she did not give up on her dream of making it into the basketball team.

* * *

**2:2:2:2 Knocked Out**

While the other girls had already beaten themselves dizzy, Zoey needed to get pushed into the dirt by perverted bully Logan Reese. And now she was even bleeding.

Inspite of the girls' protests, the evil creep did not get punished for his unforgivable misdeed.

According to the rules valid for sports on the campus, Coach Ferguson was forced to take Zoey Brooks out of the game and care for getting her safely to the nirse's station.

But the girls would have been even more lost without the only one able to play the game.

Inspite on his blossoming feelings for Zoey Brooks, bushy dweeb Chase Matthews did nothing in order to help the blond Mary Sue. The reason was simple:

Logan Reese had threatened his dorkish room mate, in a way similar to that of Dustin's fellows. More precisely, he had threatened to shave Chase's head bald at night.

Alas, Zoey refused to give up that fast, and she kept on fighting.

* * *

**2:2:2:3 Dana's Intervention**

Dana Cruz had watched the ugly scene that had caused Zoey Brooks to fly into the dust. Now she was really upset, and she decided to participate in the match. She was still not interested in joining the basketball team, she jusrtb wanted to demonstrate that Logan Reese was not the only bully on the campus. Still, her one and only goal was that of being accepted into the cheerio squad. Now she walked away in order to fetch her athletic outfit in order to sock it to Logan Reese.

Unfortunately, the trials for the cheerio squad were only schedulred for the next day.

On the other hand, the fairly low amount of girls at Pacific Coast Academy made it unlikely to reject anyone. After all, the school had gone coeducative properly in order to be able to recruit an own cheerio squad.

But Dana did not just want to be in the squad, she was hell bent on being the top cheerio for at least this year.

Her main opponent would probably be **Haley Ferguson**,[2:14] the younger cousin of coach Ferguson of the basketball team.

Dana was not sure whether that was a good or a bad sign. But she knew that she had to bite her way through the sticky situation, rigorously at any cost whatsoever.

* * *

**2:2:2:4 A Close Call**

Although only Dana and Zoey were really playing basketball, the girls were able to reduce the difference drastically with some eclatant performance on the basketball field.

Dustin Brooks was now even brave enough to cheer for his one and only favourite sister.

The final whistle was now blown, terminating a match barely won by the boys.

And this made Logan triumphate. He stated once more that girls had no place in the basketbakll team.

But coach Ferguson declared that Zoey brooks and Dana Cruz were qualified for the team, and, even more:

Zoey Brooks was made the new point guard, which was Logan's former position.

Needless to say, the soiled jerk complained, and he would tekll his dad about it, thinking that Ferguson would thereupon be fired, and a new coach would be assigned, who would then expel the girls again.

Secure in the knowledge that girls had shown to be worthy of the athletic teams here at Pacific Coast Academy, Zoey accepted gratefully the invitation of Coach Ferguson.

Dana, on the other hand, remarked that she still had to think about whether to join or not. The reason was of course that she preferred to be in the cheerio squad, and the trials for this one had not yet been. Thus her decision would be pending until then.

* * *

**2:2:3 A Party After The Match**

One hour and a half had gone by since the final whistle of the match between the boys and the girls.

Zoey Brooks had decided to gather the girls for a party in order to celebrate the close result and her call into the basketball team.

Like many other indoor parties organised by the middle school girls during the following months, this one was to be celebrated in the very lounge of Butler Hall.

Still, they did not have the guts to feast out on the open campus, surrounded by swarms of upset boys.

Now a few boys arrived in this lounge, more precisely: all members of the aforementioned basketball team, barring Logan Reese who was still in an excessively stinky mood because of having lost his former standard position in the team to a girl. This did not mean that he was out of the team, but he was not in a position as central as before, and his new, inferior position he deemed an embarrassment, given his extremely superior social status.

Chase and Michael excused themselves for Logan's unruly demeanour, and they were thereupon also welcomed to the girl's party, with pizza and cookies.

The girls felt suddenly more welcome to Pacific Coast Academy than before the match, but they were not aware of the motivations of the sponsors that had enforced coeducation at this school.

* * *

**2:3 Aftermath Of The Match**

* * *

**2:3:1 Cheerio Squad**

Haley Ferguson and her forever best friend **Tara Ganz**[2:15] were totally claiming the captain's position in the squad.

Still, Pacific Coast Academy did not have a cheerio coach on its own, and thus they needed to hire one on an hourly base.

This coach was **Joy Durka** from nearby **James K. Polk** Middle School in Santa Clarita. She was a typical sergeant coach of the worst sort, making Dana believe that she would also become like her one day in far furture.

There were indeed only a few girls interested in the job of a cheerio, and it was obvious that the school would have to hire a few girls from elsewhere as a backup.

But Dana wanted to be the number one, and this was a critical and paramount goal of her.

Haley was secure in the knowledge to be the number one, because her family was one of the sponsors. They owned a huge chain of karaoke bars in california, such as nearby **Karaokedoke**.[2:16]

Coach Durka did not really cvare about the sponsors, as she was just an hourly employee. She forced all girls to perform some cartwheels and similar typical exercises. Nevertheless, she decided in the end in favour of Haley Ferguson, causing Dana Cruz almost to break down and to burst into a cataract of tears.

The tough Latina had never ever shed any tear in her life, but this judgment had really make her cry. But was she now going to give up on cheerleading, or would she come to change her mind again? In any case, Dana would be embarrassed to death if anyone, especially any boy or any of her room mates, would ever come to hear about her tears.

There was still some time left for dana to make an actual decision whether to join the cheerio squad or the basketball team, and until then, she would deliver some half-assed performance in both.

* * *

**2:3:2 Verdict About Girls In The Team**

Malcolm Reese had duly listened to Logan's complaints. But he did not support his requests wholesale. "As long as the basketball team performs well, there is no reason for me to doubt the decisions made by Coach Ferguson."

Logan looked consternated, but he knew now what he needed to do: He had to make Zoey, and eventually Dana, perform really poorly, in a way that convinced his dad and Coach Ferguson to eliminate girls from the team. Of course he was nott smart enough to plan such a vicious plot, so he needed the help of other guys. He could not trust his best pals Chase and Michael there, as they were now friends of the girls. But he would find other ways and methods to get back at Zoey … or so he swore.

Malcolm did not really care about the middle school basketball team, but he was totally interested in the more important football team, which, along with most other sponsors, he wanted to be the flagship of the **Stingrays** — the official mascot of Pacific Coast Academy. For that reason, he had promoted coeducation at the board of sponsors, and there had been hitherto no reason to part with this concept. He had already invested a lot in the goal of building a powerful football squad as the supporting column of advertising for his movies in the branch for kids, teenagers, and young adults.

Logan sighed. He was up to joining the football team as well, and this would definitely be without girls, at least in his dreams. He deemed football as a sports for boys — manly boys — in order to impress the girls, both screaming fangirls and seductive cheerios. He was not going to veer off course anytime soon.

* * *

**Chapter 3 Quinnventions**

* * *

**3:1 The Science Club**

* * *

**3:1:1 Laboratory Classes And Teachers**

Quinn Pensky had duly signed up for the science club at Pacific Coast Academy.

The club had got its own laboratories, in addition to those used by the regular science classes.

This leads me to saying a few words about the state of teaching biology, chemistry, and physics here at Pacific Coast Academy.

While the school officially boasted with having the best paid teachers of the whole country, those in charge with instructing the pupils in scientific matters were clearly suboptimal.

**Bert Beringer**[3:1] was one of those, teaching physica and biology for middle school and high school classes, but he had never wanted to be a teacher. His dream would have been to work as a responsible biologist for a zoological garden and deal with wild beasts of all sorts. He had no clue about modern science, be it physics, chemistry, or biology, and he was often corrected by smart students who actually knew something about those subjects.

Even worse was one **Cynthia Bromwell**[3:2], a new acquisition from nearby **Brewster High**. She was perversely obsessed with the chemistry in cosmetics, and she wondered what kind of soaps, hair gels, and lotions the students were using in order to appear the way they looked. But she was a really insecure teacher that did not believe in the creativity of her student and believed that tutors were there in order to fix every problem. Of course, if she had been more than just a poor excuse of a science student, there would not have been any need for such a massive amount of tutoring in the very first place, would there? In addition, she was teaching yoga classes, more precisely: **hatha yoga**, the discipline of bending and knotting your limbs into oblivion. Needless to say, this shallow women had not got the slightest clue about yoga as such, let alone Sanskrit philosophy. In one word, she was one big embarrassment for Pacific Coast Academy, be it as a teacher for chemistry or as a yoga instructor. She would have been better off as a teacher at a school for the beauty and wellness professions than for science classes.

Our next example is **Larry Granger**.[3:3] He was a typical example for irresponsible demeanour, because he neglected regularly his duties as an overseer of the laboratory classes he taught by leaving them alone in the class rooms and going off campus for shopping.

These examples were enough in order to wonder: Why did the administration of Pacific Coast Academy not care better about the choice of science teachers?

This was more obvious when showing a few examples of science teachers elsewhere that had not been selected.

California's leading and most awarded teacher for science was **Balthazar Sweeney**[3:4] from aforementioned James K. Polk middle school in Santa Clarita. He was totally married to his job, expressed by his reluctance to wearing other outfit than his laboratory robe. His teaching habits were hard, but fair.

Even more of a scandal was the fact that **Filmore Bradford**,[3:5] the very son of Pacific Coast Academy's landlord leo Bradford, was not hired, as he had been the most awarded teacher for science throughout the United States. But he had been forced to flee from California due to some internal conflict in the Bradford family which will occupy us during the following episodes, and he was now teaching at some district school in Manhattan.

* * *

**3:1:2 Science In The Past**

So, why had the choice of teachers been that poor? Was there no money left for science teachers? Clearly, this was not the case, as we will see later down the road upon having taken a look at the sponsors' efforts.

Well, the history of science at Pacific Coast Academy had been a bit brighter during my life time.

The most important scientifically inclined graduate of the early years of Pacific Coast Academy had been **Jonathan Reese**,[3:6] the grandfather of Logan. He had thence become a somewhat ppopular — if that is possible at all for a science nerd — teacher at aforementioned California Institute For Technology.

While I was still alive, the school's board had tried hard to hire him as a teacher for science, but they had never had any chance because of the nerd's fast growing fame. The money for hiring someone as competent as Jonathan Reese had ever since been saved.

Things became even worse when Malcolm Reese, also an alumnus of our school, decided to freeze the salaries for science teachers forever.

If his father could not become a teacher for science at Pacific Coast Academy — or so argued Malcolm Reese — nobody should.

This verdict had ever since made it impossible to find suitable teachers for biology, physics, and chemistry instead of the ultimate noobs and fools.

As a consequence, the science club of Pacific Coast Academy did never get a real adviser.

* * *

**3:1:3 Equipment Providers**

But this did not mean that there were no activities and efforts going on in order to make the school a breeding place for future top scientists.

Alas, in the absence of a proper adviser, the boys had been forced to organise everything on their own behalf. Of course they needed on and off appropriate passes from the school's administration.

But utter scientific ignorants like Dean Carl Rivers, were not really able to judge the projects, and he simply granted everything as long as the expenses did not seem unreasonably high.

So, while there were no decent advisers for the science club, the school's laboratory was fairly well equipped, diue to generous donations made by those sponsors with a primary interest in the advance of engineering and technology, and these included of course especially Pear Electronics, Qualitech, and Grizzly Industries, major players in their respective branches.

The science fereaks at Pacific Coast Academy were of course totally welcome as cheap engineers and extension of their research and development departments.

Donations of technological equipment was thus a simple way of saving on expenses for skilled personal.

The donations were by no means restricted to the laboratories of the school, but they also extended to other branches of the business.

Pear Electronics, for example, donated a portable computer and other devices for each student. These products wer characterised by the presence of the picture of a pear, obviously the crest of the corporation. This way, they tried hard to tie a whole generation of future elites in various enterprises to their products. Of course they also used other means for the very same purpose, such as perverse and decadent patents, as will be seen later on.

Qualitech was co-managed by Pacific Coast Academy alumnus **Jake Savage**.[3:7] It produced various vehicles and other random stuff, and some of its products will be the centre of our focus later on. Needless to say, they exercised a devastating patenting policy that was intended to lock in the market as a whole, and they did not refrain from using the kids of Pacific Coast Academy as cheap publicity.

Grizzly Industries was the producer of a variety of chemicals used in construction trades and similar branches of industry and business. Its production was centred in Bakersfield in San Joaquin Valley. They had sometimes been the target of the critiques of environmentalists, for a variety of reasons, but there had never been any published proof against their cause. They used their sponsorship not only i order to exploit the science club, but also in order to counter bad press news by their statistics of doing something for the education of young people, which usually triggered positive publicity in a time of general miseducation and an increasingly aimless youth.

* * *

**3:1:4 Wayne Gilbert**

Lacking an official adviser, the science club was ruled by its members, and, more precisely, by one of them that had been voted their boss during the last year.

The geek in question was **Wayne Gilbert** alias **Fire Wire**. His main expertise was in the field of information and automatisation and electronics, especially the construction of robots. This hobby had made him attract the interest of Pear Electronics. He was now an eight grader, and he had joined Pacific Coast Academy two years ago when starting middle school. Ever since, he had provided Pear Electronics with valuable insights that had allowed them to improve their products significantly.

Within a few years, the Pear stores would be chock full with inventions properly made by Wayne Gilbert and his friends.

One of them budging hardly from his side was **Neil Wosniacki**.[3:8]

Another of Wayne's henchmen was one **Andrew Bernstein**.[3:9]

Telling you the truth, neither Andrew nor Neil were great scientists, they just used to hang out with Wayne for a quite different reason, and they used the science club in order to finance their common hobbies which involved especially fantasy action comics, such as those from the _Marvel_ and _DC_ series, as much as fantasy themed role playing games, both on the computer and on the table, with dice and cards.

So, while not being a complete scam, the science club was not quite what it pretended to be, and of course Wayne and his pals were urged to keep this fact a secret, especially from the school's administration, lest they would risk severe penalties for their cheating activities. And for that avaiil, they needed to keep out any other participants who would have been able to call the deceit.

This year, the only new postulant for the science club was no other than Quinn Pensky.

The statutes of the science club had been written at some point in time where coeducation had not yet even been on site, and for that reason, hypothetical postulants were only supposed to be guys.

Firewire abused this simple fact in order to decide that girls like Quinn Pensky were a priori excluded from the science club.

This way, it was possible — for the time being — to keep the inappropriate club activities hidden from the outer world.

* * *

**3:1:5 Consequences For Quinn**

The geeky lass from Seattle was of course thoroughly disappointed, and she swore bitter revenge. For the time being, she needed to restrict her research to her own dormitory room, which, for the moment, was still hers alone, as she had successfully scared away Jacqueline and Vicky.

There was thus still room in order to host the equipment for her experiments thart she had taken along with herself from Seattle to California.

But Quinn needed more than that, especially stuff provided for the science club by the aforementioned sponsors. In other words, she had to contact her main upstream source for scientific equipment: Cal Meacham from California Institute For Technology.

Cal was ready to check the long list and to show up with a delivery the very next day, if the requested gadgets were available. He was not sure that everything was possible, but he promised to look for more during the following weeks.

Quinn was able to live with this outcome for the time being. She was now up to some experiments that did not require expensive equipment. But she was rigged and ready for performiung the tests and experiments down below in her list as soon as the requested equipment had arrived.

* * *

**3:2 Trading Rooms**

* * *

**3:2:1 Zoey's First Week**

Each week, Zoey wrote a letter to her grandma about her life here at Pacific Coast Academy — or at least that was what she was up to.

This was her first letter of that sort, and the gandma was probably already totally excited.

Zoey wrote a lot about her dormitory room and her two room pals, Dana Cruz and Nicole Bristow.

Superficially, Zoey and Nicole appeared to have become best friends forever, and this was also expressed in her letter, but the shallow harmony was cheating, as would be seen a lot later on.

Alas, the troubles between Nicole and Dana had been iincreasing more and more during the first few days of the academic year.

Dana Cruz accused Nicole of being a hair freak, because the latter spent a lot of time washing, shampooing, and drying her hair with a noisy electric fan.

Nicole accused Dana of being excessively messy, as the Latino tomboy ignored arrogantly all curfews and deadlines imposed by the school, to the degree of waking up only five minutes before the first period in the morning, which was at eight o'clock.

But Zoey was also committing some serious mistakes, as she often forgot her key in her dormitory room.

While it was not possible to lock yourself into your dormitory room, you locked yourself automatically when closing the door from the outside, even without a key.

Nicole and Dana were totally annoyed because they had thereupon been forced to open the door for Zoey — every time.

* * *

**3:2:2 Emotions Of Food**

The morning after the first delivery of scientific supplies by Cal Meacham, Quinn was sitting alone at her breakfast table, looking carefully at the food in front of her.

We will later on have to talk in increased detail about the cafeteria and bars on the campus.

For now it suffices to say that the students were allowed to eat anywhere out on the campus.

Michael Barret pitied Quinn for sitting alone, and he tried to sit next to her.

But therupon, the nerdy lass from the emerald city started fingering his meals — essentially some pasta.

Michael was scared by this impolite and unhealthy demeanour to absolutely no end, causing him to flee to the next table.

Chase and Zoey were having breakfast together when they saw Michael arrive with a desperate moan on his lips.

The soul artist sighed, and he called Quinn crazy for fingering his spaghetti.

Zoey wanted to hear Quinn's side of the story, and she asked her thus for an explanation.

Quinn declared that she was studying the emotions of food. She was convinced that the meals had got their own feelings, they were possibly happy, sad, depressed, angry, or so on.

Unfortunately, neither Michael nor Chase had any understanding for Quinn's ideas.

Even Zoey was not quite at ease, but she pitied Quinn because she was so lonely. After all, she hoped that Quinn would stop acting weird as soon as she had found a few friends on the campus. She wondered about Quinn's room mates.

But, as explained earlier, Jacqueline and Naoko had run and taken cover already a few days ago because of Quinn's warnings.

As Zoey was annoyed to no end by the terror between her room mates Dana and Nicole, she had got a terrifying idea: She offered to move in with Quinn Pensky!

Of course this appeared like a perfect solution for everyone, but Zoey did not know what she had just been slipping into.

* * *

**3:2:3 Moving In**

Zoey may have felt some remorses for having left her bickering room comrades behind to rot, but she had to think about her own sanity. Alas, she was not at ease right after entering Quinn pensky's dormitory room.

So many things of unidentifiable nature were lying around, leaving no space or Zoey's equipment.

The nerdy girl from the state of Washington was not exactly willing to put aside or even trash any of her unidentifiable belongings in order to leave space for the Mary Sue's luggage. She explained that she was inventing manyb a thing, and more from day to day, that those items would be called **Quinnventions**.

Zoey was still totally perplexed. But was she already ready to regret that she traded places? Well, the only thing that made Zoey feel somewhat better in her new situation was imagining Nicole and Dana, who were terribly at each other's throat. and Zoey hated standing in their cross fire.

* * *

**3:2:4 Nightmare**

Zoey had fallen asleep, with a head full of uneasy thoughts. On the one hand, she had started being scared by Quinn Pensky, her experiments and her inventions, on the other hand, she was sensing more and more remorses for leaving Nicole Bristow and Dana Cruz alone with their stupid troubles. She was also feeling crappy for having been unable to take better care of her little brother.

Dustin had been out of money, and he had begged Zoey for a few bucks.

The blond Mary Sue had denied her brother's request. Granted, she did have to be careful with her own bucks as well because life on the campus was not cheap, as will become more obvious later down the road. But she had told him to earn his own bucks, without even trying to be more specific. Now she feared that Dustin would commit some stupidities in order to earn a few bucks, and she was unable to intervene because she had to care about her own mental pains first.

But was at least her sleep a safe haven, suited for recovering from the stress?

Any hopes of a nightly discovery were destroyed right after midnight.

Zoey woke up a few hours past midnight, and she found her head cock full with electrodes and wires of various colours. Zoey screamed like a fury.

Quinn coughed, for she woke from Zoey's screams, and she complained because of having been interrupted in her sleep, although it was of course all her fault. She had attached all the wires to the blond Mary Sue's head in order to perform some experiment. Her goal was that of monitoring the dreams of other people. Now she remarked that Zoey must have had a nightmare. She showed her new room mate the graphs of her brain activities.

But Zoey was upset, explaining that she had a nightmare indeed, but only upon waking up, and the wires and so on were its content.

* * *

**3:3 The Next Day**

* * *

**3:3:1 Before Breakfast**

Zoey Brooks had still found a few hours of sleep, but this had been definitely not much. And now she woke up again, this tiome by Quinn Pensky's noises.

The geeky girl from Seattle was jumping up and down with a rope, in front of the open window — something she did in order to stimulate her brain activity. Zoey was invited by the geek princess to do the same, but she refused to.

Quinn wanted Zoey to stay for breakfast, and she appeared to keep a hen for the breakfast eggs. Then She announced that they would have chicken for dinner.

Zoey wrongly assumed that Quinn assumed to slaughter the chicken afterwards, and she fled in terror.

Really, this was a misunderstanding, as Quinn still needed the one chicken she kept in a cage for other experiments.

But Zoey was gone, and she needed to talk to somebody.

* * *

**3:3:2 Reporting**

In the cafeteria, Zoey met Chase, and she had to tell him about the terror she had gone through during the last hours. She also explained the word _Quinnvention_.

Chase coined another expression in order to describe thje geek lady from the emerald city: "She's **quinnsane**!" Now Chase saw his great chance to move closer to Zoey, and he invited her to a movie in the campus cinema at the end of the week.

Zoey Brooks was glad about Chase Matthews's generous offer, and she accepted it on site because she needed s break both from Quinn Pensky's weirdness and from the hostility between her regular room mates Nicole Bristow and Dana Cruz.

* * *

**3:3:3 Dustin As A Tutor**

Zoey Brooks met her little brother in a passageway.

Dustin attached a note to a bulletin board, saying that he was offering tutoring in Spanish. But really, watching a Mexican soap had been his only source for knowledge of the Spanish language.

Zoey even noticed some mistakes in Dustin's announce, but she was too much scared by her own troubles to take care of his problems and find him a better way for making the monety he needs in order to be able to afford his favourite candy.

* * *

**3:3:4 Taunting Chase**

Logan Reese was still in a stinky mood because he had been kicked out of his key position in the basketball team after Zoey's courageous performance. And now he was up to destroying Zoey's life. But, in addition, he had discovered pretty easily that Chase Matthews had had an insane crush on Zoey.

In other words, Chase's brain had still not recovered from the impact of the flag pole, and his thoughts kept on fantasising wildly without having him admit to it.

Logan Reese had never had much respect for his pals, Chase and Michael, not even now after two years of sharing the same room. He treated them as his cheap service personal. His strategy was now that of raising Chase's hopes subtly, and then to rejoyce when watching Chase's frustration, because he will always be short of fessing up to Zoey, or do so in a most embarrassing and ridiculous manner, making Zoey not only turn him down, but also make fun of him.

Chase was a bit consternated when he figured that Logan was aware of his feelings for Zoey. He did not want them to become public rumours.

Logan would have loved to expose his bushy room pal to the poublic, but then it would have been all over within a few weeks. But the sadistical jerk preferred torturing Chase in the most embarrassing manner during the rest of their common life at Pacific Coast Academy, and there were regularly still almost five years to go for each of them. Now he was trying to advise Chase to make the best of the situation of Zoey's separation from Dana and Nicole. He made Chase believe that Zoey was easier to impress when she had troubles with her female friends, and thus Chase was better off fostering those dismays haunting the two girls.

* * *

**3:3:5 Zoey's Dilemma**

* * *

**3:3:5:1 Debased Mary-Sue**

Zoey was in an excessively miserable situation. She was no longer able to bear the most scary experiments by Quinn Pensky.

But Chase had talked her into giving Quin another chance. He tried to instill some remorses into her for letting down lonely Quinn. But his reasons were of course dishonest and perverted. Corrupted by the obnoxious influence of malevolent mega jerk Logan Reese, Chase wanted to prevent Zoey from reconciling with her proper room mates Nicole Bristow and Dana Cruz, and he wanted to keep her tortured by Quinn's crazy demeanour, at least until the night of the cinema movie. He imagined that an excessively troubled Mary Sue was more likely to snuggle up to him as tightly as can be during the movie — in order to look for his comfort — than some happy and unburdened girl.

Zoey slouched across the campus, wondering whether to get herself killed by Quinn Pensky's sadidtical experiments or rather by standing in the crossfire between Dana Cruz and Nicole Bristow. She had come up with a solution for her "key problem":

Adding a chain to her room key would turn it into a locket to be carried always around her throat.

But this had only been a rather minor problem, compared to the choice of room mates.

At the same time, she was consternated because she had heard news about Dustin's attempts more or less honest ways to earn money.

Dustin had actually taken bucks for tutoring someone in Sppanish, a dull dweeb named **Mark Del Figgalo**, but he was only able to teach him about the size of an elephant.

Now Mark was upset and wanted his money back, which Dustin had probably already spent.

Alas, Zoey had no time in order to even think about ways for Dustin to earn some bucks in a serious manner.

Fortunately, Mark Del Figgalo was too lame to follow Dustin all over the campus in search of his already spent bucks.

Butthis hirt Zoey more and more from the inside, and she was now rushing towards some stupid decisions.

* * *

**3:3:5:2 In Zoey's Dream**

I should have stayed out of the trouble, given that I had been dead for five decades already.

But it was obvious that the situation of Zoey Brooks was terribly sticky, and she was going to pile one bad decision upon another due to her inherent dilemma.

The problems of coeducation at Pacific Coast Academy were simply too hard to manage, especially for someone who wanted everything done perfectly in no time, such as Zoey Brooks.

So, while Zoey was a bit dizzy and almost asleep at plain daylight, it was the right moment to intervene.

I showed up as a shadowy figure in a daydream of the first female superstar of Pacific Coast Academy.

Hakf-asleep Zoey Brooks startked, wondering what was going on.

I growled: "I am a spirit from the past of this school. I tell you …"

**_"_**  
The boys here only use you, and even more the other girls. But they are just victims themselves.

The school is controlled by a system run by greedy powermongers all the way,

You need to stand up to them wherever you go, and prepare for their endless intrigues of fooling and intimidation! Only by being vigiliant will you stand through the horror trip and save the naïve rest of the students!  
**_"_**

I dissapeared. like a green tornado leaving endless shades on the campus, as I had done all that I was able to in the moment.

Zoey was apparently consternated, and then she woke up, confused and dazzled. She had seen my warning, but it was now up to her whether to take it serious, or to ignore it and make the school whither away in chaos and corruption just as during the last decades.

* * *

**3:3:6 Return To 101**

Zoey was still confused by my apparition, but she eas no less surprised when she encountered Quinn once again.

The geeky girl from Seattle insisted in separating again from her freshy acquired room mate. She accused Zoey of beeing a bad dormitory pal because of sabotaging her vitally important and fatally interesting activities, and thus there was no way for them to stay together.

Zoey was a bit shocked by Quinn's unruly judgment, but she finally returned to 101 Butler Hall, hoping that her room mates had already cooled down somewhat.

* * *

**3:4 Dustin Earns Bucks**

* * *

**3:4:1 Gummi Worm Blues**

Dustin was still too young to work in a regular job on the campus, such as as a helper in the cafeteria or one of the campus shops, and thus he had to look for more or less illegal or dubious ways to get somehow to the bucks he needed for his various obsessions.

His only chance had been getting other pupils to pay him any bucks.

He had failed miserably begging Chase for money, for the simple reason that the bushy dweeb was not exactly an expert for saving bucks even for himself.

The attempt of tutoring had been a miserable failure, and he swore to watch no longer Mexican soaps.

But these good resolutions would not allow him to buy anything.

But watching cheap soaps had inspired him to try something peoiple often did in those movies when out of money, videlicet sit on the road with a guitar or a similar instrument and collect some money from merciful bypassers that listened to their songs, using an old hat.

Of course Dustin needed a hat, a guitar, a song, and a place to perform the same in order to pull this trick.

**Wendy Gellar**,[3:10] a girl from San Diego who was interested in joining Pacific Coast Academy upon the beginning of the following academic term, had composed a little tune. She was trying hard to impress **Drake Parker**, a high school boy from her quarter in San Diego who was about to start a career as a rock star. She had not yet talked about this to anyone, but she had already uploaded the song to her _Splash Face_ account.

While not being exactly an official sponsor of Pacific Coast Academy, centralised proprietary social networking service **Splash Face** was very popular among the students of this school, and it was certainly an instrument of propaganda using the student skillfully for their own purposes, as will be studied in increased detail later down the road.

But Wendy Gellar — just like almost each and every kids in California — was by absolutely no means aware of the threats imposed by said service, and she was proud of her compositions she wanted to become famous once Drake was even more renowned, and she was interntionally acknowledged as his one and only number one fan. She had not made the song on her own, but she had been assistant by her second cousin **Adelaide Singer**,[3:11] a girl from **Rocky Road** in New Jersey.[3:12]

More precisely, Addie was one excessively gifted lyrics writer, and she had written a song particularly suited for Dustin's purpose: _The Gummi Worm Blues_.[3:13]

It was abput the misery of being out of money and unable to buy anything because of being addicted to candy.

Addie was also a somewhat decent guitar player, albeit a mediocre singer. However, she was not able to lend Dustin his guitar due to the geographic distance.

But Chase Matthews had got a guitar,[3:14] too, and he used it for a similar purpose as Addie, videlicet songwriting with the help of his musically gifted pal Michael Barret as a composer. Pitying Dustin, he could not help lending him the precious instruments, but he refrained from telling anyone about it, because he was ashamed of the songs performed by Dustin. Unfortunately, Chase had not got a hat.[3:15]

For that avail, Dustin could not help simply using the guitar case as a container for the donations made by most generous passengers. Now he had just to choose an appropriate location, and there he was inspired by Chase's and Zoey's upcoming cinema date: He simply sat down at the entrance of the campus movie threatre, which will be analysed later down the road.

As there was a great movie tonight, many kids were passing the entrance and had to listen nolens volens to Dustin's performance, occasional;ly dropping a buck or so.

Even Zoey, who had previously refused to lend Dustin even a dime, dropped one of those, while passing there. She was now feeling a little bit better, but she knew very well that this was not going to get anywhere, even if Dustin bothered to sing the whole night through, making his throat burn like eating chilli pods.

Chase was less generous, and he just dropped a withering flower which he had wanted to give his adored Zoey, until — in the last moment — he was let down in the rain by his volatile courage.

In addition, Nicole Bristow and Dana Cruz showed up as well, as if they had reconciled. They had been invited by Zoey. But now they started bickering again, this time arguing for the best spots in the audience.

Dustin sighed when the traffic calmed down. He had gathered a few bucks, but he still needed to pay Chase for borrowing the guitar, leaving him with little money to pay his debts. Also, he was forced to hide from the campus control.

* * *

**3:4:2 Test Object**

Once more, Dustin Brooks was left wanting a way to pay his debts.

And this time, Quinn pensky came to his rescue. She needed test persons for some of her inventions which needed to be checked and balanced before getting released for public usage.

A silemnt leaf blower had worked greatly, making it possible for Nicole to fan her hair without bothering Dana's sleep.

But there were so many quinnventions left in the queue, and they needed someone like Dustin.

Quinn offered a few bucks, and, knowing how desperate Dustin was, this was an easy deal.

Of course, Zoey Brooks would have jumped through the roof because one of her mates was using her excruciatingly naïve little brother.

Alas, neither Zoey nor Dustin were aware of the faxct that there were much bigger abusers of guys like Dustin and many other kids on the campus, and those were the very loreds of the elitarian boarding schools.

* * *

**3:4:3 Errand Boy**

And there was someone else offering Dustin a few bucks:

Logan Reese, one of the few students with money to boot, was much too arrogant to do many daily tasks on his own, and he paid other kids bucks for those.

Dustin's job would be that of fetching letters and parcels from the campus post office for the spoiled rich jerk.

Of course, Zoey's little brother weas totally glad because of that offer, and he accepted without hesitating.

This was beyond any trace of a doubt another thing that would not really make Zoey happy during the following years, but she kind of had it coming, right?

Zoey should have better cared for the deeper reasons of the demeanour of certain guys, something rooted in the general situation here at Pacific Coast Academy. She had been warned by my appariotion, but whether she would heed the alerting ammonition and act appropriately, or igore it until it was too late:

That was entirely yup to the blond Mary Sue from Louisiana, the one and only true hope for the current and all following generations of students at this illustrious boarding school.

* * *

**3:5 The Campus Cinema**

The movie theatre on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy was about thirty years old, although it had sometimes changed locations. It belonged to a chain of cinemas known as **Première Theater**, with headquarter located in San Diego.

**Helen Baxter**, the boss of the chain, had been a famous actress on her own right during her early years,[3:16] and she had retired from Hollywood after some unruly arguments with aforementioned Malcolm Reese. But she had still got her connection to the centre of the world of modern entertainment. After all, most of the movies shown in her theatres were produced by Malcolm, especially the latest successes that will have to be studied later down the road.

Helen far away, the campus cinema was usually run by students that were thusly earning a few bucks.

Of course there were quite a few restrictions for the choice of movies to be performed, given that the students were very young, and thus there was a strict censorship prohibiting movies with adult and mature adult ratings.

Censorship used to be more stern during the early decades of the school, but nowadays, the school's administration was too busy and used to permit everything as long as nobody protested.

Yet there were occasional independent quality controls.

But Helen Baxter had always found ways to get around restrictions, thusly increasing her income recklessly beyond any limit. She was hardly ever present at this branch of her cinema chain, but her arms reached far, and she did not tolerate any contradictions by those working for her.

* * *

**Chapter 4 Espionage**

* * *

**4:1 An Evening In The Lounge**

* * *

**4:1:1 Confess Or Stress**

The middle school girls, including Zoey Brooks, liked to spend a few hours each evening in the lounge. They used to sit together and to play social games. They even ordered food from the bars, preferrably sushi from aforementioned Sushi Rox. Usually they were playing party games, and they ordered food from one of the campus pubs for supper.

The latter will be in the centre of our focus later down the road.

During the first days, the girls had played bingo, the favourite game of Nicole Bristow, but this had become increasingly lame, especially in the eyes of Dana Cruz, who had of course not hesiated experessing her opinion in a rude and barely miscomprehensible manner.

Now the girls had chosen **Confess Or Stress**,[4:1]_a game where they had to roll dice, and thereupon — depending on the result — either confess an embarrassing secret or accomplish a daring request made by their fellow players_. All girls were new, and they still had got a hard time getting to know each other.

But now they were also waiting for their sushi, and they had turned increasingly hungry.

We will later come back to the secrets of the girls and the stressing dares.

* * *

**4:1:2 Kazu And His Delivery Boys**

* * *

**4:1:2:1 Kazu And Sushi Rox**

Kazu Park[4:2] had just reived the girls' order via telephone, and he was now about to cut the dead fish and other disgusting stuff. Although he was a passionate cook for sushi and other Japanese specials, he was by absolutely no means certified, in the sense that he had never acquired a license for running a kitchen in an acknowledged restaurant. He also had never worked as an intern in an established sushi bar, but he had just followed some kind of family tradition, or, rather, pseudo-family tradition for that matter.

Really, there were strict rules for the staff of a kitchen, as accidents were usually of catastrophic consequences.

But there was a reason why none of the responsibles had never cared until now.

Kazu had been running his business on this campus for ten years already, and he had not been the first person to run such a business. He needed of course some resources, as he was hardly fishing the tuna and other marine life forms on his own.

The upstream provider of Sushi Rox was **Pacific Sushi**, _a chain of fish factories supplying most sushi bars in Southern California with tuna and other seafood_. They were running bunches of fish factories, starting in San Diego.[4:3] They had provided the early costs for establishing the sushi bar on the campus, as soon as the students of Pacific Coast Academy were considered a potentially solid base of customers. And they had high expectation that really stressed sushi bar owners such as Kazu. In addition they were totally ruthless business men, employinh unqualified workers for jobs that are – at least according to the law — subject to hygenic rules. Likewise, they ignored the international agreements protecting certain endangered species of fish by selling nowadays extremely rare blue fin tuna.

Kazu was not aware of all this, he just needed to keep expenses low and sales high in order to survivbe in an environment of low budget customers. And of course he was not able to do the whole work alone:

There were quite a few temporary employees, students of this illustrious boarding school: Waiters, delivery boys, kitchen slaves. This way, he also contributed to the income of certain students.

* * *

**4:1:2:2 Bars On The Campus**

This makes us look back into the history of this phenomenon.

The forerunners of Pacific Coast Academy had been absolutely hostile to multicultural business on the campus due to political and — even more — religious reasons. And especially in the years of the war between the United States and Japan for the hegemony in the Pacific islands, none of them would have tolerated a Japanese bar right here.

This had still been the case during the early decades of Pacific Coast Academy, even after my death, due to the ethnical prejudices of the foundation fathers of our school which had still stood under the impression of the war.

The hippie generation, however, caused a change of mind, albeit in a totally hypocritical manner.

The administration had not changed their minds on site into being open towards new exotic experiments.

But marketing studies had shown back then that catering and frenchising were the way to go.

These economic consideration had overshadowed old prejudices, but never made them disappear.

In other works, Kazu and all the other catering enterprisers were nothing but much ridiculed tools for the dirty work of the capitalist and imperialist sponsors pf Pacific Coast Academy.

Granted, Kazu was now no longer running around with a sushi cart, like most other vendors on the campus, but the social hierarchy had not changed this way.

We will stumble upon a few other vendors for snacks and drinks later on.

The business on campus was not restricted to food, but their were also shops for books, clothes, daily cosmetic articles, and so infinitely many more.

The same principles as above were also valid for all these, although their goods were different: Greedy sponsors and upstream provioders saw a great market potential in those students and abused this shamelessly.

We will accompany students to those shops later down the road in order to see how all of this worked.

* * *

**4:1:2:3 Logan And Chase At Sushi Rox**

One of the delivery boys here at Sushi Rox was Logan Reese. Why — as you should wonder — did the spoiled jerk even need to work for the campus sushi bar?

The answer is simple:

Logan did not need this at all, because his pocket change was larger than the income of Kazu. In other words, Logan was using his job as a delivery boy for different purposes.

And none of his goals were in any way noble — as you should have guessed long since.

The first main reason of Logan was that being a delivery boy would get him sent into the girls' dormitory hall in order to deliver sushi ordered by the female students. He loved hitting on a varioety of girls, and this of course was one of the few great opportunities for doing so.

Of course even the wish to hit on girls was by absolutely no means a reason for Logan to stain his hands with the traces of work and sweat.

Indeed, Logan did not really do any work, but he delegated it, as had always been and would always be his custom.

The one to delegate the whole dirty work to was no other than Logan's naïve room pal Chase Matthews. And this one bushy dork was also abused for a different kind of work.

* * *

**4:1:2:4 The Spy Bear**

Logan Reese had come up with a diabolic plan in order to make Zoey Brooks and the other girls pay dearly for the humiliation he had suffered from when he got moved from his usual spot in the basketball team, following the match against the girls' team. He was up to spying on the girls' lounge and making fun of his knowledge about the girls' secrets that he hoped to be shared over there.

Of course there needed to be a way to sneak a spy into the lounge, and the perfect occasion for this was the delivery of the ordered servings of sushi. Logan's first idea of doing so had been that of hiding somehow in the lounge, or to pay some other guy for doing so, but this sounded complicated.

In some cheap espionage movies produced by Logan's father malcolm Reese, the villains or detectives often used inanimate objects with a built-in hidden microphone and camera.

Of course Logan Reese lacked the technological knowledge for turning such a plan into reality, and so he needed to hire someone else.

Wayne Gilbert alias Firewire, as the boss of the club for science and technology, was of course by all means the one person to address to and to hire for such a project.

Logan wondered especially how to put a long wire for the telecommunication between the microchip and Logan's laptop, or whether there was anything like a wireless solution of which he had heard a lot in the commercials spread by Pear Electronics.

Wayne cackled manically — which was by no means unusual for him — and declared that wires were so out. Indeed he had invented the infamous fire wire technology for espionage devices, and he had already sold quite a few of these over the interweb. He wanted to get Pear Technology to buy the technology off him once he had demonstrated its reliability.

His first client was one **Megan Parker**, and elementary school girl from San Diego, which happened to be the little sister of aforementioned teenage rock legend Drake Parker. Megan used to punish the **boobs**, videlicet: Her useless brother Drake and their dorkish step brother Joshua Nichols, by pulling pranks on them, and thus she needed to stay informed about their moves.

Drake and Josh had not deserved any better, as they were totally decadent and embarrassing, as will be seen later down the road.

Wayne had not found a sponsor for his patents, and he wanted Pear to buy it off him, after some successful test.

Megan had not really trusted Wayne, thinking of him as a total freak and nerd, and thus she was not ready to write a review for the technology able to convince the responsible experts in the headquarters of Pear.

Logan would even prepay the patent fees for Wayne, allowing him to make more money in the long run by negfotiating as a peer with Pear Electronics instead of begging like a sick and hungry puppy for being considered.

Given this background, a deal was struck easily between Wayne Gilbert and Logan Reese.

The inanimate object hiding the microchip was carefully chosen as a giant plush bear, feigning to be a gift for the girls in order to make up for Logan's rude way of treating the girls during the first weeks since the start of the current academic year, especially Zoey Brooks.

As Logan was too lazy to carry the bear, he simply commanded Chase to do this dirty job. And of course he refrained from telling Logan about the evil intentions tied to this Trojan horse.

* * *

**4:1:3 Unwary Girls**

The girls were a bit surprised because Chase was accompanying Logan for this errand.

Logan explained this because he needed to show Chase how to do the job on his own. And of course he also introduced the plush bear to the girls.

Zoey Brooks, Nicole Bristow, Dana Cruz, and the other eighth grade girls were still upset because Logan had treated them poorly, and they were glad because Chase was now also a delivery boy, nd one of the nicer sort.

Finally, the boys were done and left the building, leaving the bear behind.

According to Nicole Bristow, the plush beast was very cute.

Now it was time for the girls to continue their game of _Confess Or Stress_.

Among other things, Zoey had to confess that she had once tooted in church.

Nicole, on the other hand, admitted to making a list of boys with the most attractive lips. She was compiling this table during some boring tutoring lessons. Of course she did not understand anything about numbers and statistics, which rendered her list of boys' lips utterly useless, but she impressed her pals with it.

Quinn Pensky, who had joined the party game only a bit later, had to tell her mates that she still liked baby meals.

Further down the road, Zoey was dforced by Nicole and Dana to pull a telephone prank on **Mr. Callahan**,[4:4] her teacher for the English classes. She feigned that the teacher had ordered a huge amount of mustard, and she wondered where to deliver the spicy cream.

Of course, the teacher had not ordered any mustard at all, and he was totally consternated and desperate, making the girls laugh to no end.

Zoey had been totally cool while pulling the prank.

Quinn would have preferred to let a venomous snake bite Zoey's, but the scope of the dares was to cause embarrassment and not to constitute a danger for life and sanity. Indeed, Quinn was keeping a snake in her dormitoy room for certain experiments,[4:5] but this will be a subject for later episodes.

Of course, the girls assumed that their secrets would never become beknownst to the boys, and they had even sworn to refrain from talking about it to any of them. They did not suspect that Logan Reese was monitoring them on his laptop, joined by a variety of other boys, and he was now informed about their secrets, ready to abuse these informations in some excruciatingly shameless manner for the purpose of embarrassing Zoey and her pals.

* * *

**4:2 Leaking Informations**

* * *

**4:2:1 Taunting**

The next evening, the girls were consternated, because the boys were aware of all the secrets they had mentioned during their party game.

Various boys, usually friends of Logan Reese, taunted the girls with stupid remark about these most embarrassing informations.

Unfortunately, the girls were still not seeing the connection between the plush beast and the terribly leaking rumours.

But Zoey remembered her daydream — or vision — of my ghost. Still, she knew nothing about my former existence, and she thought of me as a figment of her subconscious. She was hit by a series flashback covering both my apparition in her sightings and how she had been treated by Logan Reese. "I sense that Logan Reese is behind it … again!

Dana and Nicole had got a hard time making any sense of Zoey's statements.

Nicole sighed, because she deemed Logan still incredibly cute, and she had got a hard time believing that he was just a jerk.

Dana swored to beat the living hell out of the wretched body of Logan Reese — at least if there had been any proof.

But Zoey decided to do something else …

* * *

**4:2:2 Sick Logan**

Of course Logan Reese was by no means ready to stop his fatal onslaught on the girls' privacy, quite the contrary, he made it even worse. In order to be able to watch them live, he stopped working as a delivery boy for Kazu and sat at his laptop more and more, accompanied by other excessively evil and utterly perverse guys, such as aforementioned Brad McClaren. But instead of simply dropping the job, he feigned being ill.

Now Chase, still unaware of Logan's excessive perversity and corruption, was forced to take over the whole deliveries.

This of course was fully part of Logan's decadent plan, as he wanted to punish Chase in the most painful and embarrassing way for taking the side of a girl, videlicet of Zoey Brooks. There was no way for the abominably spoiled jerk of Beverly Hills to tolerate a female superstar at Pacific Coast Academy.

The abominable perverts needed something in order to celebrate their party, and thus they ordered a lot of sushi from Kazu's pub.

* * *

**4:2:3 Chase As Only Delivery Boy**

Chase Matthews was of course not exactly pleased when he heard from Kazu that he was now forced to do the orders all alone, because Logan had just reported himself as sick. He was even more shocked as he, as Logan's room mate, should have noticed earlier today whether Logan was sick or not.

And the spoilt creep had looked pretty healthy to the bushy dork all day long until now.

But Chase was much too naïve to refuse to believe the stupid lie. Also, he hoped to gather more tips this way. Before anything els, he was commanded to take a very huge order to the customer, and the latter happened to be no other than Logan Reese.

Well, at least the address of Logan was perfectly known to Chase, well, in the case of the bushy dork it was not really obvious that he would find his own dormitory hall, but it should have been easy.

But this was of course by absolutely no means the only order to be accomplished by Chase Matthews.

And the whole campus was large enough to take over half an hour to cross.

The customers were of course by no means any better.

Delivering any amount of sushi unto Zoey Brooks was of course a basically pleasant task for the bushy dweeb.

But there was an order from some guy, who — against the strict verdict prohibiting pets at Pacific Coast Academy— kept a pet goat in his dormitory room, a lad fron little known state **Eudonia**,[4:6] in Eastern Europe, a state whose crest animal was a goat.

He also liked to watch the only movie by an Eudonian director that had ever made it to Hollywood, a movie totally hard to get at in California, not even for someone with perfect contacts such as Helen Baxter.

Even worse, the horned furry beast also ate spiced tuna.

This alone filled Chase Matthews with extreme disgust. Obviously, he was also feeling each of his linmbs hurt like whipped by furies with heavy leather thongues containing viciously barbed hooks. The most annoying trip for Chase was that to the apartment of Coco Wexler, aforementioned dormitory adviser of Butler Hall.

The chubby mess had visited an expert for diets, but she never stuck to the suggestions, anyways, yet she complained over and over about being too fat. She was also terribly addicted to sushi. But in the moment of Chase's arrival at her door, she was under the showers and telephoning her boyfriend Carl.

The two of them kept on arguing a lot, forcing Chase to wait outside the closed door.

Actually, the door was not locked, as Coco had neglected this usually necessary action due to her horribly messy attitude.

But Chase was able to hear the water of the showers, and he was disgusted to no end by the prospects of stumbling into an at least half naked Coco Wexler. Also, he hated the fact that he was probably not going to get any tips from the extraordinarily poor excuse of a dormitory adviser. He would have liked to just drop the ordered sushi putside her appartment and then run away, but he needed to collect the price for the sushi.

Even after having ended the phone call, Coco kept taking the shower, and she even started singing in an — as expected — absolutely horrible manner. making Chase's ears bleed and his brain churn.

Finally, Coco did not even have enough bucks at home to pay for the sushi, and she gave him some empty cans of ravioli instead.

Fortunately, Chase already knew someone willing to buy all sorts of old trash:

**Joseph Brexly** alias **Joe The Mechanic**[4:7] was _a wrecker and repairsman for old cars and similar metal junk running his workshop and junk yard only a mile down the road_.

Of course there was absolutely no way for Chase to get all the money back from Coco by selling the tin or brass cans, and so insisted in other payments.

Coco growled: "You may take my used undergarments! I found new ones in the campus shops that fit better to my stockings!" She belched in a most disgusting manner, making the scent of slowly rotting ravioli distribute itself faster across flat, finally hitting Chase in a way that made him throw up.

Chase was certainly not happily pleased by the thought of the dormitory adviser's used panties, either, and he did not know anyone that would buy them off him.

* * *

**4:3 The Reaction Of The Girls**

Finally, Quinn Pensky used her hand made metal detector in order to check the giant plush bear, discovering a hidden implant sending wireless messages to some transponder outside the lounge.

Nicole Bristow tried to look smart by pretending that she had always known that this was the case, although she was way too dumb to know what she was even talking about.

Of course Zoey did not understand Quinn's tech talk either, but she refrained from boasting with it, unlike her utterly ditzy bimbo friend.

Naoko and Jacqueline were equally in a bad mood.

Dana still wanted to beat up the boys and break all their bones into tiny smithereens.

But Zoey got her room mate to calm down. "Be careful!" She sighed deeply. Her first idea was that of beating bastard jerk Logan Reese with his own weapons.

The hidden camera could be used in order to perform a little comedy in the girls' lounge.

Watching Logan was supposed to go all crazy over it.

This was essentially the idea of Chase Matthews, who — as will be seen later — was a gifted and aspiring albeit slightly weird playwright of the most supreme sort.

The comedy would have been like this:

**_"_**  
Chase and Kazu are arguing in the lounge.

The latter accuses the former of having stolen sushi from his kitchen and then distributed freely among the girls.

Thereupon, the bushy dork has no other choice but slayuing the owner of Sushi Rox, using a heavy glass tube.

The consternated girls decide after some discussion to hide the lifeless corpse of Kazu in some janitor's closet, and to take it later in a car top the Mexican border. Then they would make Logan Reese accoubntable for the deed.

**_"_**

Logan would certainly have gone insane, admitting to his misdeeds even in front of the school administration.

But Zoey was not sure whether this was what she really wanted. After my ghastly appearance, she had started to understand that this was somewhat the fault of the system, and not just of Logan Reese. Of course she did not yet know exactly how the machinery had worked, but she wanted to punish rather those who were really responsible for the chaos, whoever that was.

Dana, on the other hand, had already lost her patience, and she wanted to beat up someone badly.

Unfortunately, there were strict laws against killing fellow pupils at Pacific Coast Academy.

Zoey calmed Dana down, deploying some insane rhetorical efforts in the process.

Dana Cruz grunted and roared like a hurt lion. "Something has to get destroyed for that …" She grabbed the giant plush bear and shread it into microscopic smithereens with her bareclaws and teeth, like a wild smilodon.

Nicole Bristow was of course utterly consternated, squealing "Noooo! The bear is so cute!" She tried to defend the plush pet, infuriating her untamabvle room mate even more.

Zoey had to keep Nicole out of Dana's path in order to prevent her from getting hurt in the process.

Nicole started weeping like a cataract, wetting the whole floor of the lounge in the process.

Dana had finally torn the whole thing into pieces and found the micro chip. Before Quinn could examine it in detail, she stomped on it with her whole might, crushing it into peacemeal. Thereupon she felt a whole lot better, she she was still up to shredding Logan Reese's face into a lump of blood and bones — one fine day to come.

Quinn Pensky looked consternated, as she was now no longer able to study the espionage technology in detail.

Zoey wondered, "Logan is much too dumb for that. How was he able to install such a minic chip anyways?"

Quinn scratched her chin. "Correct!" She coughed noisily. "He must have had an expert for electronics to back him up."

Zoey nodded solemnly. "So Logan is not alone behind everything, there is some evil network behind the whole junk."

Nicole was still way too stupid to understand what her pals were talking about, and she was still upset because of the destroyed cute plush bear.

Zoey Brooks promised Nicole to buy her a new giant plush pet for her room, without any sort of microchip inside. This way, she achieved finally making her stop weeping and just sulk sadly in a corner instead.

Quinn pondered for a few minutes. "OK, I know one guy whoi is able to build those microchip: Wayne Gilbert!" She told Zoey about the troubles she had got with the science club of Pacific Coast Academy. Of course she was right, but she did not yet see the exact reasons for Wayne Gilbert's lockout policy.

Zoey figured immediately that Quinn would have been much more bearable if she could perform her experiments and develop her inventions in the official school laboratory instead of her own dormitory room and on her room mates, which had already caused her some painful experiences. She needed to do something about the whole miserable situation. But she also needed to find a giant plush bear for Nicole to cuddle. She wondered where Logan had got one from.

Nicole guessed: "From the plush pet shop?"

Dana glared at her excessively ditzy pal in a very abusive manner, daring her to shut up on site.

The floor of the girls' lounge was now covered with the stuffings of the plush bear, not making it look any longer as nice and inviting as it had been before.

There were of course janitors at Pacific Coast Academy, but Zoey Brooks preferred to remove the rubble from the floor as fast as possible on her own in order to avoid more troubles.

* * *

**4:3:1 Aftermath Of The Spy Bear Affair**

* * *

**4:3:1:1 New Plush Bear**

Finally, Zoey Brooks had found out about a shop to order a giant plush bear from.

Quinn checked the delivered beast on site, because she did not trust the delivery boy who had fetched the beast from the post office of Pacific Coast Academy.

Zoey shrugged, but she had to agree with her pal. "Better safe than sorry!"

Nicole was totally excited beyond any hithrto beknownst measure, because she had always wanted such a huge cute cuddle plush pet for herself.

Quinn was thinking about a way to make Wayne Gilbert pay dfor having rejected her postulancy for the science club, along with his cooperation with Logan Reese. She guessed that there was something smelling fishy in Wayne's club, and those were not the remains from their last order from Sushi Rocks.

Zoey was now concerned with something else. After the recent French classes, she had been called into the office of headmaster Carl Rivers.

* * *

**4:4 Zoey To Take On Paris?**

Secretary **Beverly Brown**[4:8] had already been waiting for the blond Mary Sue and let her into the admin office.

Zoey excused herself for being late. "My room comrades Dana Cruz and Nicole Bristow were fighting once more over a plush pet, and so I had to intervene. Sorry for being late."

Beverly sighed. "Dean Rivers is even more late!" She had not anticipated al;l the stress that was going on here at Pacific Coast Academy. Her former job as a administration secretary in some hospital had been less troublesome, inspite of the emergency room. She had thought that a private boarding school was a fairly quiet place for administrational staff, but she was apparently mistaken.

Truth spoken, the campus of this school had been less chaotic before the arrival of the girls, and it was not obvious whether this was a good thing or a bad thing. According to my judgment, the peace at this school had always been a hypocritical, forced one. The arrival of the girls was now just reveiling huge amounts of dirt and turmoil that had been always hidden underneath the fragile surface.

So, inspite of being disappointed by the first weeks here at Pacific Coast Academy, Beverly was pleased to meet Zoey Brooks, one of the pupils she had already heard a lot about during the first weeks, which was amazing. She started talking about what she had heard about the Mary Sue from Louisiana.

None of the boys had ever become that famous during his first few weeks at Pacific Coast Academy, not once in half a century.

Finally, Dean Carl Rivers made it into the office, and he was told by Beverly about the presence of Zoey Brooks. He grunted. "Miss Brooks …"

Zoey feared that to headmaster was up to announcing some punishment. "We have duely removed the remains of the plush bear. And it was a private gift by some other student, not property of the school!"

Carl Rivers panted like an old and rusty steam locomotive after a traversal of the continent from coast to coast. "OK, the vandalism of Miss Cruise …"

Zoey had to correct him. "Cruz — her name is Dana Cruz!"

The headmaster looked puzzled. "OK, she is not a good example for other students, so would you please take better care of her?"

Zoey looked consternated, wondering why the dean had not called Dana into his office. "Sure, I will!" She was not pleased by being supposed to take some responsibility for her misguided room comrades' evil deeds, but she had already started doing so at her frist day on our campus.

Carl Rivers sat down. "OK, but that is noot the reason why you are here. It is because of your French classes …

Zoey coughed noisily. "I am one of the best pupils in our class!" Her voice was a bit shaky.

The headmaster noddded solemnly. "I know, and that is the reason." He started explaining in some bored way: "We have got that exchange program with a certain boarding school in Meudon near Paris …[4:9]

Zoey corrected his screwed pronunciation. She knew Meudon as the residence of a few more or less famous artists of the nineteenth century.

Carl Rivers looked aghast. "Anyways, your teacher for French has suggested you for a exchange scholarship because of your good performances, here as well as back at your old school."

Zoey was surprised. Of course she knew very well that she had always been great in French, just as in about all subjects, but she had never been suggested for an exchange problem. "Er … I will talk to my parents aboutr it." The thought of moving across the ocean, leaving behind some of her new friends, and especially her little brother, did not exactly fill her with please.

The headmaster nodded. "Sure it is up to them to allow you to participate in the program." He gave Zoey some information sheet. "But we need to know their response in time for the next year. Theoretically, the guys in France would accept you until sophomore year, but no later. But he sooner we know the better …"

Zoey shrugged. "I will think about it." She was aboput to leave the office.

Carl Rivers growled: "But don't forget to control the situation between your room comrades, they are about to turn the whole school into a breeding place of chaos and turmoil!" He sighed when seeing Zoey leave the office. He had been in charge with the administration of Pacific Coast Academy for five years, and he had not yet seen any month like that at this school. But he was not surprised, because the presence of female students for the first time was not supposed to go ouyt without woes and deeper troubles of some sort. How had he — an alumnus of Pacific Coast Academy — become the headmaster of this school anyways, and how had he tried rto cope with the recentr developments?

I will have top talk about this subject later on, but for now it is enough to say that he was not really able to handle the situation, for various reasons that will become more evident later on only.

* * *

**4:5 Dangerous Cheerleader**

Dana Cruz had to think about Zoey and her dream. She thought it stupid to listen to anything like dreams and vision. Being a vulgar materialist, the reckless tomboy only believed in what she was able to touch and break with her own hands and feet, and this did of course by no way include ghastly or phantasmal figures appearing in nightmares and lucid dreams. So she had heard that the girls here were only toys of the boys, who in turn were only mindless stick puppets of those ruling over the school. But did she really have to care? Actually, she deemed everything OK that helped her getting closer to her one and only true goal, videlicet that of being a perfect cheerio girl, martial dancer, and supermodel. All means — or so she declared without a trace of hesitation — were appropriate for making it up to there.

The easiest way at this school seemed to be by becoming a cheerio girl, for this did not mess with the boys' career plans.

At the beginning of the academic year, Dana had been driving herself into a situation where she was urged to decide between becoming a member of the basketball team or the cheerio squad. And now the choice was much clearer, she decided to go the easy way and become the cheerio girl, if not the cheerio captain. And she would make everyone bleed to death who would ever try to stand in her way — or so she swore. Dana had been granted a few weeks in order to decide, and now the decision had been made.

So, clearly, Dana Cruz and Zoey Brooks were about to react to the revelation of the girls' purpose at this school in a different manner, and the same was of course valid for no other than their ditzy room mate Nicole.

The latter wench simply decided to … no, she did not decide to do anything, simply because she was in no way able to see that there was anything at stake. She only cared about the cuteness of boys, not of their abusive demeanour. Furthermore, she was nowhere near able to understand the deeper connections concerning administration and sponsoring of the school.

Quinn would certainly see it as a scientific problem worth of being examined by herself or by more competent kids. But she was still interested in finding a way of making it into the science club, and she wondered about a closer connection between Zoey's day dream and her exclusion from aforementioned circle.

* * *

**Chapter 5 Talent Show**

* * *

**5:1 Animals On The Campus**

* * *

**5:1:1 No Pets**

There were strict rules against keeping animals on the campus.

But Quinn Pensky did not stick to this rule, which she deemed obsolete. She kept some pets for scientific purposes, anyways, as already seen in the case of the chicken.

There was a king snake named Marvin, an anonymous rat,[5:1] a bird spider named Herman,[5:2], and many other small beasts.

She needed to keep them hidden from the eyes of aforementioned evil dormitory adviser Coco Wexler, and she was very successful here, possibly because she did not have any dormitory room mates by now. Of course she would not have been able to hide her bigger pets, as would be a problem much later on.

* * *

**5:1:2 Wild Beasts**

But those small secretly kept pets were not the onlty beasts on the campus.

As aforementioned, more or less giant squirrels seemed to cause a lot of troubles.

Dustin Brooks was afraid of them, and not only of these, but of other animals of that size as well, such as toads and fish.[5:3]

Later on, we will learn about even more obnoxious beasts, such as skunks.

Those wildlife invasions were not just a problem during the time of Zoey Brooks, and definitely not caused or influenced in any way by coeducation. Indeed they had occurred every now and then already during my life time on this campus, and there had been even more of them back then, as the urbanisation of Malibu had not yet been progressing that far.

The atter was supposed to keep wildlife away from the campus, but — quite to the contrary — some wild animals were more and more attracted by the urban wastes, or they were evem looking for shelter from the elements of nature.

This was for example the case of aforementioned James K. Polk Middle School in Santa Clarita where a weasel had been already hiding for over a year.

That school's custodian, a certain **Robert Gordon**,[5:4] was sharply determine to catch the evil beast and to get rid of it, be it alive or dead. Gordy had already dried many plans, but hitherto failed all the time.

Of course Pacific Coast Academy had also got custodians and janitors, and those were no less concerned by the attacks of wild animals, but they had hitherto failed completely getting rid of the plagues. At least they were not as obsessed with the extinction of wild life as aforementioned Gordy from Santa Clarita. as there had been worse problems.

One of the most important janitors on the campus was a certain **Herb Cates**.[5:5] He was most popular among pupils like Chase Matthews and Michael Barret.

Chase Matthews was panically afraid of racoons,[5:6] another kind of animals of the size allowing them to scurry around the campus like nobody's business and scare pupils every now and then.

Being a friend of Chase, Herb Cates was of course also concerned by the possible invasion of racoon like animals. This was even more the case as Dean Carl Rivers did not tolerate any beasts on the campus, and the janitors were thus responsible for keeping the whole battlefield clean. But Cates was nowhere near as obsessed with ridding the campus of one cingle animal as aforementioned Gordy from Santa Clarita.

But what had caused Herb Cates to take up a job as a janitor at this illustrious school anyways?

He was by no means paid any better than the average janitor in some arbitrary building in the county of Los Angeles. But his true passion was of course not janitoring, and he was rather obsessed with acting. This was also the reason why he got along that well with Chase Matthews.

The bushy future playwright had promised Herb to write a play just for him, taking care of his personal strengths and weaknesses as an actor, and he had already started with this, although it was just a modification of the works of William Shakespeare who happened to be the favourite dramatic poet of Chase Matthews.

But Herb Cates had started to work at Pacific Coast Academy even before Chase's arrival, and the reason for this choice was precisely the fact that the school was sponsored by one of the greatest Hollywood producers. Granted, Pacific Coast Academy was by no means specialised in this field, and there were — as will be seen below — much better schools for future Hollywood stars. But there was no simple job available at those other schools when Herb needed a paid occupation, and thus Pacific Coast Academy appeared to be a most appropriate choice. So now he was stuck with giant squirrels and other unwelcome campus visitors, and he was totally unable to cope with this furry plague.

* * *

**5:1:3 Elvis**

As opposed to Quinn Pensky, Zoey Brooks and her other friends had hitherto obeyed all the time to the rule prohibiting any pets.

But now a little stray puppy had somehow invaded the campus, and he had crossed the way of Zoey's gang. It is not obvious from where he had come and what had made him enter the hallowed grounds of Pacific Coast Academy. Of course the closest reason was the puppy's hunger and the odor of food emanating from the campus, especially rotting fish from Kazu's Sushi Rox. In this respect, the canine invader was not much different from genuinely wild visitors such as rodents, mustelides, and racoons.

The stench from the Japanese pyub was really incredibly pervasive, and it attracted more than just hungry little mammals, as will be mad clear later on.

Many people seem to believe that only cats were interested in rotting fish, but this was nowhere near the case.

Zoey gave it the named **Elvis**,[5:7] honouring thusly her favourite rock star of the previous century.

Dana Cruz did not really welcome the barking bugger, though, and she threatened to castrate him, should her room pals fail miserably in keeping him silent.

The problems were obvious:

Dogs — eve one as small as Elvis — were often feeling compelled to bark and thusly reveal their presence in the dormitory hall.

Nearby dormitory girls annoyed by the sounds of the puppyt were not unlikely to denounce the situation unto Dean Carl Rivers. This was especially the case when the students were woken up by the barking noise in the middle of the night.

Another problem was of course the fact that Elvis needed some kind of dog food. Of course he would be content wirth leftovers of human food, but this was not necessarily easy.

As we saw, the kids were able to order food from bars — such as Sushi Rox — on the campus to their lounges. This fact made it possible for them to collect leftovers and hide them in their dormitory rooms.

But of course it was not always possible to get a puppy to eat exactly the amount that was left over, and then the decaying remains were most likely to release some malodorous gas, finalkly filling the whole dormitory room with some less and less bearable stink. In addition, the warm and humid climate in the dormitory rooms caused the development of not only annoying scents, but also of dangerous germs and poisons, endangering the health of the resident girls.

This sanity problem was potentially very grave, as would be seen later on. Germ-induced diseases and toxic contamination would spread like wild fire on the campus. Cases like this had occurred already several times in the history of Pacific Coast Academy, to some minor degree already back in my days.

Little womnder, there were strict laws for denouncing and dealing with cases of biological and chemical hazards, requiring measures auch as quarantines, ecvacuations, and temporary closing down the whole school.

Any occurrence of such an incidence did decrease the confidence of the public in our school, not just for the time being, but potentially for generations to follow.

This was of course nothing for the school's administration and the board to take lightly, and thus there were those terribly strict rules against animals on the campus.

* * *

**5:2 Sibling Troubles**

* * *

**5:2:1 Unhealthy Candy**

As aforementioned, Dustin had been a staunch supportert of his elder sister upon arrival on the school's campus.

Unfortunately, said sibling harmmony was very fragile, as the blond Mary Sue was totally overprotective.

Dustin felt thusly very uncomfortable in Zoey's vicinity, and he was more and more embarrassed by this situation.

The main reason for Zoey's intervention was once more Dustin's addiction with candy.

Dustin's insensate obsession with gummi worms, which had already driven him into tough financial troubles, was already well known all over the campus. Butb they were now even topped by a new obsession for a new kind of candy:

**Ping Pong**[5:8] were artificially coloured sugar balls, the night mare for all teeth and cause of other health problems.

Those candies had been sold on the campus in the cafeteria.

This had been the case already during my life time, but it was now subject to changes: Vendor machines were about to replace more and more of the human shop staff. They had of course got the advantage of saving salaries. One major disadvantage was that, unlike human vendors, those machines were not able to tell if a customer had already had enough of the stuff that was to be sold. As long as they sensed the money in their slots, they were ready to spit out the good, provided that the machine worked correctly, which was unfortunately not a given either.[5:9]

But who was behind all those candies sold on our campus, anyways? Well, some of them were provided by aforementioned Schneider's Bakery, such as **powdered mini doughnuts**[5:10], and **fruit doodle cakes**.[5:11] Their latest product were so-called **fatcakes**, similar to donuts but even worse.

There were two brands of fatcakes: An American and Canadian version.

Ping pongs were nothing that needed flour or leaven for production, but as of recently, Schneider's Bakery had acquired the license for selling them, anyways, and this both in Washington and in California.

So, Zoeu had now caught Dustin with a bag of unhealthy sugar balls in his hands, and she could not help taking that major threat for her brother's help off him, against his explicit will. This way, she got him angry and upset.

Chase Matthews was standing next to Zoey, and he even defended Dustin in some sense, but a really clumsy way which was absolutely unsuited for the purpose of changing the blond Mary Sue's mind — quite the contrary.

Dustin Brooks was now in a totally stinky mood, but things were still about to turn worse.

Chase Matthews had swiftly swallowed some of the pingpongs confiscated by Zoey Brooks, but now he was forced to spit them out again.

But what was Zoey going to do with the ping pongs anyways? She was up to complaining at the school administration for selling unhealthy crap to the students. She was now one of the first students in California to organise an initiative against these. Of cpuerse she would not be able to mobilise immediately a whole storm against unhealthy snacks, but she was not someone to give up easily.

* * *

**5:2:2 Academic Contests**

* * *

**5:2:2:1 Our Teams**

Dustin Brooks was really smart for his age, which was underlined by his presence in various academic teams of the school. His favourite team was that of the spelling bees, as he knew a lot of cool and difficult words. He was also in the math team, and for that reason, he had been allowed to visit middle school classes iin order to prepare for the Greater Los Angeles contest.

Pacific Coast Academy had of course got quite some tradition in academic contests, and this dated already back to my times.

I had never made it into any of our teams, as I had got troubles with some of the teachers.

Of course, the academic teams were by no means considered as important as the athletic squads, especia

Anyways, kids participating in those teams were often considered a nerds or so, and thus even more subject to being victims of the most deprecable sort of pupils at Pacific Coast Academy next to jerks of the Logan Reese type.

* * *

**5:2:2:2 Bullies**

Unfortunately, it was not easy for a smart guy in a class with many big dumb guys that were easily upset.

Dustin had been sent by Dean Rivers into the geometry classes of **Omar Kirby**.[5:12]

Omar Kirby was of Afro-American ethnicity, and this was something unheard of in my times at Pacific Coast Academy where all teachers had been white anglosaxon males.

You may think that times had changed during the decades following my death, making Pacific Coast Academy a much more liberal place, but, just as in the case of opening for girls, the decision to employ people like Kirby had not been a step gone voluntarily by the Bradfords, or without greedy second thoughts.

Just as cheerios were usually girls, afro american sport stars were common in a lot of athletic disciplines, especially the one that mattered most for the board of our school, videlicet football.

And without those African power parcels it was nowadays impossible to make it anywhere in the football season.

In order to make it easier to get pupils of that ethnbicity to join Pacific Coast Academy, teachers like Kirby had to be employed.

But not withstanding this move, Leo Bradford was basically your average racist.

And now back to Dustin's new class fellows: Some of them looked pretty dangerous.

The ringleader of the totally bad guys was on **Keith Finch**,[5:13] who was also the captain of the fencers' team.

His main henchman was one **Luke Riley**.[5:14]

Dustin was now forced by those excessively perverse creeps to do their homework. Buthe was not willing to tell Zoey about it, because he was disgusted by her excruciating overprotectivity.

Unfortunately, Zoey had noticed anyways what was going on, as she noticed that Dustin had stayed awake all night in order to do Keith Finch's homework. And now she was ready to intervene and to embarrass her little brother even more than ever before.

* * *

**5:2:2:3 Dustin's New Mentor**

Zoey wanted to threaten to beat up Keith and his gang.

But Chase dissuaded the Mary Sue from doing so, and he suggested to scare the living hell out of Keith. He wanted janitor Herb to dress as a member of the administration and to intimidate Keith, making him stop bullying.

Zoey was tempted to give in, but them she changed her mind, as she knew after my revelations that the source of the whole problem was not Keith in person, but the system that turned guys into bullies. She had understood that something was thoroughly wrong here at Pacific Coast Academy, although she had not yet figured the deeper contexts. Until then, she decided it to be the best to let Dustin stay out of the ways of thr rude middle school and high school guys that were likely to bother him in that unpleasant manner. Of course she was proud of Dustin's achievements, as would be her parents and grandparents when she would talk about it in her letters, and thus she did by absolutely no means want him to retire from the math team or the speller bees.

There needed to be some other way for preparing the little smartie for the upcoming contests.

Zoey thought about a mentor for Dustin, and her first thought was of course her friend Quinn Pensky.

Unfortunately, the geek girl from Seattle was not really willing to do so.

First, Dustin was already spending time with Quinn as her test object for various experiments, and he did not want Zoey to know about all that. Second, it would be too easy for him to figure that Zoey had arranged something.

And finally, Quinn was currently occupied with other things …

So, Zoey was looking for another mentor.

Wayne Gilbert alias Firewire was the lest trustworthy choice of all.

Fortunately, Chase Matthews knew a suitable nerd: **Miles Brody**,[5:15] a freak living most of the time in some obvscure spot somewhere deep in the school library.

But there was one hook:

The uncomely nerd required a date with Nicole Bristow in order to be ready to accept Zoey's job without telling Dustin about the reasons for it.

Of course, there was no way for the ditzy bimbo wench to accept these conditions. "Miles is not cute!"

Zoey knew that. "But it has to be. I will do your laundry for the rest of the academic year if you …"

Nicole scratched her chin. "OK … but that is not enough …"

Zoey finally ended up offering to do Nicole's homeworks in various subjects for the rest of the academic year. "This way, you will have more time in order to watch all the cute boys …" She sighed and moaned, as she had just obliged herself to do everything for Nicole that Keith Finch had previously forced Dustin to do.

Nicole smiled. "OK, thanks Zoey!"

* * *

**5:3 What Are Your Talents?**

* * *

**5:3:1 Girls' Talents**

Pacific Coast Academy had already organised talent shows during the fidfties, and thence during my life time.

I had participated there, but it was nothing important, and nothing liked by anyone in the audience. Really, I should have been over with it for many a decade, shouldn't I?

But this year, there was the first Pacific Coast Academy middle school talent show including female talents — apparently.

Zoey Brooks, Quinn Pensky, Dana Cruz, and Nicole Bristow were now sitting in their lounge, wondering what to do.

Nicole's first idea had been the following: "We have taught Elvis to behave like a plush dog , whenever Coco shows up in order to control our rooms."

Zoey nodded solemnly. "And that is a talent?"

Nicole nodded" "Yeah, we are gifted dog trainers, and Evis is so cute, we can't lose the contest!"

Zoey knew only that much: "I can't let Dana and Nicole perform anthing together, it would and up in a thermonuclear catastrophe."

In addition, showing Elvis live on the stage implied admitting that they were hosting a pet right on the campus, and that was of course illegal. Otherwise they would not have had taught Elivis that trick in the very first place.

Quinn reacted by explaining in scientific detail what would have happened during a thermonuclear hazard.

Needless to say, her friends were neither interested in listening to the nerd girl'd talk nor able to understand any of it.

Dana Cruz knew pretty well what she was up to performing: "I will smash a few plates and planks with my pure hands and feet instead of those … or Nicole's bones, unless she stops annoying me!"

The ditzy bimbo wench from Kansas gasped. "Ouch!"

Zoey stepped between her room mates. "You will not hurt Nicole, will you?" She glared penetrantly at the bully Latina.

Dana shrugged and sat down again.

Quinn started talking about the number and the variety of bones in the human skeleton, and how hard it will be for Dana to crack them all.

Dana was close to kicking Quinn's head off her torso and making it fly through the open window across the campus, just like a cannon ball. Once more, she was stopped by Zoey.

Nicole wondered: "Does shopping count as a talent?"

Dana was almost ready to punch Nicole's mouth shut. But she was not able to get past Zoey.

The blond Mary Sue shook her head. "I don't think so! And making savings while shopping is definitely none of your talents!" She sighed, as she had already made some painful experiences with Nicole's shopping habits, and she would make even more of those during the following months.

Nicole sulked in a corner. "If I can't impress the cute boys with something, I will not only lose the talent show, but also end up as an old spinster!"

Dana grunted: "Not much of a loss for the boys of this world … really!"

Nicole glared aghast. But the n she had got an idea: "Zoey, do you remember my ugly tank top which you changed into something beautiful in almost no time? And how you made your brother look a whole lot cooler?"

Zoey nodded. "Sure, but for the latter I had your help. You were able to improve his haircut to something even he liked."

Nicole nodded. "Shouldn't we display our talents in making others look a lot cooler?"

Zoey smiled. "That sounds like a wonderful idea! We should practise on a few dummies as soon as only possible!"

Deadly annoyed Dana growled: "Do what you want, but stay out of my way, or else …"

Quinn Pensky's choice was even harder. "It is impossible to demonstrate my scientific talent in front of an ignorant audiencer." She sobbed in excessive agony. "I could build a nuclear bomb and blow up the whole campus, but there would not be any audience left to applaus for me!" She banged her head against the walls of the dormitory room."

Zoey said: "Living in your room for two days straight, I spotted some brass wind …"

Quinn sighed deeply.

**_"_**  
The trombone? Yes, you are somewhat right, I do practise with it.

But Elvis always roars like a wounded lion when I start trying to do so. He must feel awfully hurt when listening to it.

**_"_**

Dana growled: "And so would I!" She glared menacingly at the geek girl down the floor, telling her this way to refrain from even daring to try to blow her trombone in her presence.

Quinn sighed deeply. Of course she could have tried to perform her old majorette for the talentb show, but she hated this and tried as hard as only possible to deny that she had been a pageant girl of any sort. She imagined that her renown as a genius girl would be destroyed in no time at all, should her dark part ever have become beknownst unto her comrades.

Dana remarked: "If Quinn invented and demonstrated something that made herself dissolve in thin air, and Nicole on top of that, I would certainly applaude for her at the talent show."

Zoey shook her head. "Dana, stop it! And Quinn: Nothing that is able to get us all killed!"

Quinn sighed for despair. "I could demonstrate my surgical skills and perform a transplantation!" During the last weeks, Quinn Pensky had kind of started some new career as an amateur surgeon, as will be seen in detail a few lines down the road.

Dana suggested rudely: "You could surgically transplant some brain into Nicole … that of a mouse would already be a huge improvement."

Zoey panted heavily, and she told Dana once more to stop her sarcastic comments. "And Quinn … no surgery

She finally decided to solve **sudokus** very fast: _Riddles where you had to fill a grid with numbers, following certain rules._

This was at least not likely to wreak any major havoc on the campus, such as killing all students, teachers, visitors, and staff members within a few minutes.

Dana grunted: "What a nerd!" But her words fell like cotton balls.

* * *

**5:3:2 Boys' talents**

For Chase Matthews, Logan Reese, and for Michael Barret, the choice was a lot faster.

Logan was convinced that his major talents were his looks, and this way, he was not forced to practise for the the taklent show at all. He saw himself as the unbeatable favourite of the event. He was especially not willing to let a girl win it. "All talent shows have hitherto been won by boys, so girls have no place in them."

Chase and Michael had agreed on making a song together and perform it at the talent show.

Michael was also — at least in theory — able to play the flute, but he would have been too much embarrassed by doing so.

But Chase would provide the lyrics, leaving the job of composing the tune unto Michael. In any case, he was up to playing the guitar and singing the text at the same time.

Now there was still some time left for them to practise. and they better used it well, or else the evening would have been one horribly embarrassing experience for them, making them hide in some mousehole in the back yards of the campus.

* * *

**5:4 Dustin's Failure**

Dustin had also practised a lot for the Los Angeles contest for middle school mathematics teams.

Miles Brody had been a great trainer for Dustin, and he had got his requested date with Nicole Bristow, making her puke for seven days straight.

Unfortunately, the competition was very strong, and the Pacific Coast Academy team had to do without Quinn Pensky — the only person at our school able to beat everyone with her ultimate mega power brain.

Nevertheless, Zoey Brooks rooted strongly for her little brother, but the situation was hopeless, anyways.

The whole contest was dominated by one **Albert Wormenheimer** from no other school than aforementioned James K. Polk in Santa Clarita.

Zoey Brooks disliked in particular the teacher of the Polk team, a certain **Dr. Xavier**, who was apparently a Russian prison guard rather than a teacher. And now she had to comfort poor little Dustin who felt like a miserable loser. Of course the Mary Sue told him that he would be better during the next year, and stuff like that, and she really did believ in it, but she doubted somewhat the sense of contests like those where little boys got disappointed badly, And she knew that Dustin would soonn participate in the **Greater Los Angeles Speller Bee**, with probably equally strong competition.

Dustin Brooks was embarrassed because he had lost, but this time aroun d he was glad that his elder sister was here in order to comfort him and to dry his freely flowing tears.

* * *

**5:5 Quinn's Medical Career**

* * *

**5:5:1 Encounter With Doc Glazer**

Already at the age of seven, Quinn had developed huge interest for human anatomy and pathology. She aimed for researching possibilities to improve the humen body by bypassing the perversely slow process of evolution. She had already started designing biotronic limbs at the age of eight, although she did not have the means for producing them for real, let alone the possibilities of deploying those.

But her luck had changed upon her arrival right here in California.

Aforementioned Glazer Brooks, uncle of Zoey and Dustin, had visited the campus during the second week of the academic year in order to see his nephiews. Upon this encounter, he had also run into the geek princess from Seattle.

Quinn had impressed the medic from San Diego with her knowledge about modern medical achievements.

More precisley, Glazer had told Zoey the reasons for his belated arrival on the campus, an emergency case in the streets of Los Angeles.

Quinn had thereupon started immediately to make detailed suggestions for a potential treatment of the poor victim of thge accident. Inspite of being only a middle school girl, she was more precise and informed than most med school students after several years of book studies and hospital practice.

* * *

**5:5:2 Junior License**

One day later, Quinn Pensky had received an offer from Glazer Brooks: She was granted a junior medic license, making her his deputy.[5:16], and she had accepted it greedily. This allowed her to perform some minor activituies under his auspices.

But actually, Glazer was not really stern here, and he allowed Quinn even to perform a huge variety of surgeries in his absence, as long as she reported regularly back to him. Indeed he would learn a lot more from Quinn than vice versa.

Quinn also started performing surgeries. Yet she had not removed any kidney surgically, but she knew perfectly well how to do so. Some of her surgeries were performed in her dormitory room, but not bloody ones. For that avail, she was looking for a suitable location where none of her room mates would ever have dared to tread.

The outcome of her research will be reveiled later down the road.

For now it suffices to say that Quinn's opportunaties for deploying her self taught medical skills were still multiplying rapidly.

Biotronics alias cyborgism was not Quinn Pensky's only envisioned means for improving the human life form beyond what was possible by natural evolution.

Another important field of her research was genetic engineering and manipulation, and her progresses were increasing rapidly. This was by absolutley no means restricted to human genetics, but covered the whole spectrum of life in this degenerated world. We will see more of this in some later passage.

* * *

**5:6 Show Your Talent!**

* * *

**5:6:1 The Performances**

**David Bender** was the teacher chosen by Dean Rivers as a responsible adult for supervising the current middle school talent show. He greeted the kids and the present visitors.

It was not possible for the parents of all the kids to show up, as many of them were living far away or travelling somewhere around the world and the seven seas. This was especially the case for Malcolm Reese, Loigan's dad, who was about making a movie somewhere in the land down under.

The whole event would almost have been cancelled, had it not been for Zoey's triple intervention.

Logan had always boasted with his beauty, and with the fact that none of the girls would even have dared to challenge him, as girls' talents were really uninteresting and irrelevant.

Zoey knew now very well that she could not get boys in general get away with this, and she needed to demonstrate that nbot only boys' talents counted at Pacific Coast Academy. "It is not a matter of us versus Logan, but a matter of the system at Pacific Coast Academy."

Nicole had not understood anything, but always supported her best friend in an enthusiastical manner.

Aftwer all, Zoey and Nicole were the first pupils on the stage — a fact that increased their nervosity in an inflatory manner.

Zoey announced: "OK, Nicole and I will turn a few uncool guys into some neat and cute young man, or a wallflower into some hot lady."

Nicole nodded. "We have got a box here, containing the names of volunteers."

Zoey poked her pal. "You have to draw one of the names from the box!"

Nicole gasped. "Oops!" The shook the box, making a few small sheets drop out.

Zoey shook her head. "I will randomly pick some sheet from the floor …" She panted heavily and read from the note: "Miles Brody!"

The ultimate nerd grinned and entered the stage.

Nicxole was upset, and she wanted to drop out of the number.

But Zoey grabbed her by the wrists and persuaded her after a few minutes into carrying out the plot, just as planned.

Nicole sighed deeple as she had to mousse the hair of the uncomely and boring nerd.

At the same time, Zoey Brooks started snipping his uncool outfit into shape.

They had practised that procedure on some dummy dolls duri ng the last few days — over and over again. But repeating the same thing with a live guy, and in front of a live audience, was nowhere near as easy.

But finally, a seemingly new guy was representimng himself to the puzzled eyes of the audience — perfectly styled by two perfect stylists.

Nicole fell on her knees, and she started begging the very Miles Brody for a date. "You are so cute!"

Of course, Miles was still the same utter nerd he had always been and would always be until the end, and just his new looks deceived the ditzy bimbo wench into the next era.

Nicole Bristow would sooner or later find out, though, thusly reversing her decision.

But for now, the two girls from 101 Butler Hall harvested lots of applause.

Quinn was impressive when filling those grids — drawn onto a huge blackbiard with chalk — with numbers in a logical manner.

Unfortunately, unly few kids were impressed, but this was better than everyone getting blown up into smithereens by whatever experiment with nuclear bombs.

Then it was time for Dana to show up on the stage. She had prepared various stacks of wooden board, and even a few marble slabs, in order to demonstrate her brute force and her dexterity, as much as the touchness of her bones, muscles, and ligaments. Releasing a thundering kiai, she broke with her limbs through the breakables, causing smithereens to fly left and right across the stage.

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret were disappointing all over the place.

The reason for their failure was not because their lyrics or their tune was bad.

Rather, they had stupidly listened to the suggestions of Logan when preparing the performance.

The teenage jerk from Beverly Hills had tried hard to make his pals nervous by talking about Chase's more or less obvious crush on Zoey. He had seen easily thatb Chase had never stopped thinking aboout her when writing this song.

Logan just did nothing on the stage, secure in the knowledge that this was not necessary in order to convince anyone of his own hot and fantastic looks. For that avail, he was disqualified by Mr. Bender.

* * *

**5:6:2 The Winner**

The talents were done with their performances.

The judges were high school kids, but they were also considering the opinions of the middle school audience.

Unfortunately Helen Baxter, aforementioned cinema queen, had not made it in time. She was a superb moderator of talent shows, with lots of experience.

The final decision was due, and the judges decided that the vast majority of viewers preferred the performance of Zoey Brooks and Nicole Bristow, videlicet the restyling of Miles Brody.

Logan Reese was now in a totally stinky mood, exactly like Dana Cruz.

Quinn was just bitterly disappointed. "They are just not worthy of my talents. They are nothing but dumb creeps!" But at least she had made videos of the performances of almost everyone with her web cam. "Maybe someone will make a web show of this!"

Michael and Chase were fighting with each other. Accusing one another of having ruined the performance.

Nicole wondered whether she should open sort of a booth for styling other students, "We would make some bucks, and turn more average ;looking guys into cute ones." She almost started swooning upon the though to having a lot more of the latter on the campus."

Zoey was not sure, because she was really occupied. And now she recieved the trophy for the talent show from the hands of **Lisa Bender**,[5:17] the teachwer's wife.

The latter remarked: "You girls must be hungry[5:18] after this stressy night,would you like to join a little buffet for the winners? Only well-selected health food!"

Nicole and Zoey accepted gladly the invitation. Their day had been quite exhausting — indeed.

Too bad, the whole buffet, planned for like a dozen of people, had already been devoured empty in a solo revel by Coco Wexler, who had been in charge with guarding it — oh well!

The chubby matron would rue her evil deed, though: She would have to puke while taking a shower and stink up her apartment for over a week, until an intervention of the Los Angeles Health Office.

* * *

**5:7 Week Of Pranks**

There had been an old habit at Pacific Coast Academy, according to which new students at the school were pranked for a whole week by the established ones. This tradition dates to the times of Vietnam, and thus after my untimely disappearance from the face of the earth. Nevertheless, the roots of this week were much older.

The custom was derived from some very traditional British colleges where it had been introduced already in Victorian ages.

But this year, all girls were new at Pacific Coast Academy, and thus they were targetted as a whole as victims for cruel pranks by the established boys.

Logan Reese was once more the ring leader of the evil guys. He had planned to cover the walls of Butler Hall with partially used toilet paper. Of course, he was by no means up to staining his fingers with filth, and so he delegated the same job once more to his pals, especially Chase Matthews and Logan Reese.

* * *

**5:7:1 Terrible Awakening**

A few days later, Zoey Brooks woke up in the morning, right in her bed, but she did not see Nicole in her bed.

Dana already hoped that her room mate had disappeared over night into thin air.

Unfortunately, this was by no means the case:

Nicole was still in their dormitory room – just hiding and cuddling under Zoey's blanket. She was afraid of flashes of lightening, and she had been used to hiding in the case of such an event 'neath her mother's covers.

Zoey sighed deeply.

Her brother had sometimes been hiding in her bed, or that of their mom, but that had stopped four years ago. Now he would have been embarrassed of doing something like that. Note that Dustin was Nicole's junior by almost four years.

Anyways, there had been any lightening, flash, or thunderbolt during the past night, excluding this as a reason for Nicole's fears and unease.

But there had been noises and flashes of light anyways, as will be seen a few lines later down the road.

Anyways, there seemed to be some unusual rumours coming from the hallway of the same dormitory room — in the very same moment.

Zoey went checking, because she needed to go to the toilets across the corridor, anyways.

Vicky told the girls from 101 that the whole outside of the dormitory hall was stained with used toilet paper. Well, she did not exactly talk about **used** paper, but the vibes of her voices insinuated that this had been the case.

* * *

**5:7:2 The Culprits**

The girls, including Zoey Brooks, Nicole Bristow, and Dana Cruz, sat down for breakfast after having verified the situation. They were of course totally consternated and specualted about the authorship of that perversely tasteless prank.

But then Michael Barret and Chase Matthews, upon joining the girls, admitted to having been the culprits, along with the other boys of their diormitory hall. Incdeed they had been bribed and blackmailed by Logan Reese, the ringleader of everything evil emnating from middle school boys on this campus, but they did not mention him as the main criminal. Of course there was no excuse for their deprecable deed, and they knew that very well, but they explained it with aforementioned foul and disgusting tradition of pranking new students. Even more, they used the pranks they had suffered from just two years ago as a poor excuse for their ruthless onslaught on Butler Hall.

The boys had snuck out under cover of the darkness, scaling the dormitory walls and attaching the toilet paper. This was of couerse connected with quite a few sudden noises. They had needed electric torches for executing the plan, and this had caused a few little flashes.

This explains why Nicole Bristow had been misguided into believing that their was some lightening storm going on outside.

The girls were not necessarily willing to let the guys get away with that excruciating perversity.

* * *

**5:7:3 Revenge**

There was now a meeting of the girls in Butler Hall.

Many of them were up to some sort of revenge.

This was especially the case for Dana Cruz who wanted the beat the living excrements out of the evil boys, especially Logan Reese.

Zoey tried to calm the girls down, because the whole revenge stuff sounded totally cheap, a typical boys' concept. "WE girls should stand above it!" In addition, she knew that the boys were only tools of the system, although she still was at the beginning of exploring what exactly _the system_ meant.

Quinn, on the other hand, had got ideads on her own, based on her scientific superiority. "We will surgical remove their kidneys!"

Zoey Brooks was totally disgusted by that idea, as she had been by the one of transplanting some organs on the stage upon the talent show. She would have wanted something more funny, such as dressing the sculpture in front of the boys' dormitory room in girls' dresses. But she decided to delay the girls' revenge until a point when the boys expected it least, and until she had understood better why boys at Pacific Coast Academy had become incredibly perverted bastards.

And this was a good choice, for the sculpture was one of the foundation father of Pacific Coast Academy. At the beginning of the upcoming homecoming celebrations, overlord Leo Bradford would have noticed this and caused a lot of troubles.

Alas, there would be enough of them anyways, as will be seen later down the road.

* * *

**Chapter 6 Drama For Zoey**

* * *

**6:1 Theatre At PCA**

* * *

**6:1:1 Connections To Hollywood**

Not only was the campus of Pacific Coast Academylocated in the outskirts of Hollywood, as some would say, there was also a tight connection between the world of the movie business and the home of the stingrays.

As aforementioned, Malcolm Reese was both one of the most influential producers at Hollywood and sponsors at Pacific Coast Academy, due to long family traditions older than the school itself. And there had been other producers before him that had supported us religiously, just as our forerunner. This had been the case already during the time after Word War I, when Hollywood was still very young and not as established as some theatres at the East Coast.

Granted, there were better schools for future Hollywood stars.

The most well known prep school for the Hollywood branch was by all means **Hollywood School For The Professional Performance Arts**, as already suggested by the very name. The school was also sponsored by mighty producers, including Malcolm Reese.

But this did not mean that there were no real talents for the big screen or the backstage to be found on our campus.

* * *

**6:1:2 Future Superstars**

Not all parents of potential superstars of the big screen wanted to send their kids to a school like Hollywood School For The Professional Performance Arts or even **Palmwood Hotel**, because it was a brute business, and what appeared to be a promising star at the age of seven would later on fail miserably, leaving a kid with no decent education.

For all these cases, studies at Pacific Coast Academy offered more than one reasonable alternative.

One of those future stars at Pacific Coast Academy was **Ashley Blake**,[6:1] an elementary school girl that had been acting for the big screen already at the age of four, but this had been the case due to connections between her parents and the productiion company. Nevertheless, Ashley had harvested an whole string of awards as an actress, and she was still great in the business, inspite of her arrogant attitude which made it hard for her to work together with the rest of the production team. She was also not really eager on learning texts, so she was an expert for pantomimic theatre.

Her brother **Vincent Blake** was also at Pacific Coast Academy, and he was new, just like Ashley. He was also her body guard, a job for which he was qualified because of his bulging muscles and quick reflexes. He needed those in order to go for his big goal, which was that of becoming a star of the **National Football League**.

As there were more female divas than male divas, an increase of the amount of drama queens was expected during the following years, as more and more girls would join Pacific Coast Academy.

* * *

**6:1:3 Jeff Garrett**

Needless to say, there were quite a few alumni of Pacific Coast Academy who were now making a Hollywood career, and who returned regularly to the campus for a varioety of events.

Malcolm Reese was bot a Hollywood producer and an alumnus of this most illustrious boarding school, and many other alumni were working in his service.

This included especially **Jeff Garrett**,[6:2] one of the heartthrobs of the women worldwide around the millenium turn.

Not too long ago, Logan Reese had hired Jeff Garrett for some kind of school project, a commercial for one of the latest projects of Qualitech.

More precisely, the commercials were for some sort of scooter named **Jet-X** by Qualitech. It was claimed to be much more than just a scooter, and aforementione Jake Savage was always offended when hearing his vehicle considered as just a scooter.

Jake Savage was a close friend of David Bender, and both of them had studied at the same time at Pacific Coast Academy. Of course, Jake and Qualitech, like all sponsors, only abused Pacific Coast Academy in order to wash money and to make more of it by abusing the naïvity of the students and of most of the teachers.

This time, the innocent tools of the greedy sponsors were Bender's class in mass media studies, a very popular subject at Pacific Coast Academy middle school.

Of course the board of sponsors was well versed in making those subjects as popular as can be in order to work on a next generation of competent staff for the respective companies.

And now back to Jeff Garrett's task: He was the star of Logan's commercial for scooter, and he was obviouskly totally popular even in this job.

Likewise, Logan had borrowed his father's professional equipment for the production of the commercial. He was supposed to work with Michael barrett and with Chase Matthews, but, after letting them perform some slave tasks, he had simply sidelined them and forced them to shut up most of the time.

All the other teams — usually groups of three students — had to do with equipment from the school's storage.

Of copurse those cameras and what not were good devices, donated by aforementioned Pear Electronics, and they did serve the purpose of shooting short clips, but they were not comparable to Malcolm Reese's professional production equipment used for proper Hollywood movies.

But Jake Savage had nevertheless decided in favour of another team, more precisely that of Zoë Brooks, Nicole Bristow, and Dana Cruz, because if Qualitech had wanted a Hollywood production with adult actors and the whole backing stuff, they would simply have hired Malcolm Reese right away. Due to the good connection between m ost of the sponsors, he would not have encountered any sort of a problen in doing so, neither of the personal nor the financial sort. As made clear by Savage at the very beginning of the project, the purpose was that of letting teenagers make a commercial for a product designed and marketed for teenagers as target customers.

This underlines that the sponsors were very skilled in using the students of Pacific Coast Academy for their own greedy purposes.

But did the kids understand that they were just abused by this project? Unfortunately, this was not exactly the case, barring Zoë Brooks, and that only kind of sort of:

The charming Mary Sue from the grand old south was becoming more and more wary of the good intentions of the sponsors, but she was feeling constricted, as everything at Pacific Coast Academy depended on their mercy. She did not really dare to secondguess Qualiotech or any other member of the board of sponsors, as she was not sure whether it was a good idea of biting the feeding hand.

Dana did not really care. she only knew that every video of herself broadcast over the interweb would increase her chances for getting chosen as the next top model for sportswear.

Nicole Bristow just liked looking cool on the video clips.

During the shootings, the girls had been at each other throat, and the team was split for quite a few days, leading to some catastrophe. Only in the end, the bits and pieces got sewed together by Zoey in an all night job.

Each of those girls were awarded with a new scooter, or — as Qualitech insiste — Jet-X. But was it really an award, or just a bait for the other students?

Zoey had started turning suspicious, and she was no longer to be fooled easily by the feint generosity of the sponsors that tried hard to hide their purely selfish interests form the students. During the clip, Zoë Brooks had explained that the advantage of having a scooter was that it would allow her to get eaier around the campus, and that this would make her more independent. So freedom and autonomicity was one of Zoey's major goals. But now she started to understand more and more that Qualitech and other sponsors tried hard to make everyone dependent and to steal their freedoms away, step by step, one by one.

* * *

**6:1:4 The Drama Club**

* * *

**6:1:4:1 Renown**

Like most schools, Pacific Coast Academy had got a drama club, and the impact of Hollywood offered all sorts of prospects beyong the possibilities of a comparable club at a school far away from Los Angeles or New York City.

One should have expected that the drama club was the gathering point of all those interested in a Hollywood career, but this was not really the case.

Aforementioned Ashley Blake — for example — was not willing to participate, as she did not like learning lame texts that had not been written in order to underline her perfect acting prowess. Her strength was, as aforementioned, the pantomimic play, and not acting accordiong to a script prescribing your words.

Logan Reese was equally absent — or had been so for the longest time, which was totally surprising, given his father's fundamental position in the Hollywood business. Of course the reason was similar: he was way too lazy to learn texts not tailored especially for himself.

In addition, neither Ashley nor Logan saw the stage of a school theatre as anywhere near as important as the big stage of Hollywood, they deemed it as a cheap and dirty facsimile of the latter.

After all, those participatiung in the drama club had got usually a lot of fun there, but were not necessarily looking forward to starring professionally. Thing was different for aspiring background figures, though. But in the eyes of most guys here, the theatre club was a place for freaks unable to shine in the real clubs, especially the football team.

Well, the football team had been in a crisis for quite a few years already, and that was the reason for luring ggirls hereto.

Of course, the opening for girls was likely to change the situation slightly, as this club was supposed to be a place for a fair amount of the girls to hang out, and thus horny creeps would be rather attracted to this club.

So, had the theatre plays until now been boys-only? Sometimes, girls from outside Pacific Coast Academy had filled in for the female characters. But there had also been transvestites chosen for that purpose. One of the latter was aforementioned Mark Del Figgalo.

* * *

**6:1:4:2 Fletcher St. Troy**

Like almost all clubs at Pacific Coast Academy, the drama club had got an adviser, and in this case, it was **Fletcher St. Troy**,[6:3] He had formerly been a Hollywood actor, working especially for Malcolm Reese, but he had never been great in this job. St. Troy Was still pissed because of this, and he was looking for the right moment to make a return to the big screen that moved billions of viewers around the world. He had already taught at other schools, and sometimes even several of them at the same time. But he appeared to like this one here most of all — at least until the arrival of the gorls.

It was not uncommon for failed professional actors to turn to teaching at schools, especially drama clubs.

Fletcher St. Troy was also the responsible choreographer for the cheerleading team of Dana Cruz. There had been quite a few problems for him in the beginning.

While the school had opened for girls properly in order to have its own cheerleading team, Dana's attitude of switching forth and back between cheerleading and basketball had caused some trouble. The bully Latina had enforced her taste for musics upon everyone else, and she intimidated everyone daring to contradict her.

* * *

**6:2 Alien Girl Zorca**

* * *

**6:2:1 Chase's Script**

This year, St. Troy had decided in favour of a new play: _Alien Girl Zorca_

Chase Matthews had written it as a homework in his English classes was about some alien girl stranded on planet earth and — along with her spaceship — about to get sucked away by the wallowing waves of the mighty Pacific.

The name of the girl was **Zorca**, which sounded a lot like Zoey.

Anyone with eyes to see was able to concluede immediately that Chase had written the play speciafically for the angelic Mary Sue from Louisiana, because he was totally obsessed with her, and he had been so since the moment of her arrival on the campus.

Of course Chase had not wanted Zoey to drown for real. But during the first week of the running academic year, he had got a dream of rescuing an almost drowning Zoey Brooks from the raging whirls of a mighty maelstrom not far from the shores of Malibu. This was — and so Chase saw it — kind of paying back for their first common day at Pacific Coast Academy, when the bushy dork had crashed against the flag pole and thereupon been raised back to his feet by the charming blonde.

Objective observers will not doubt in any way that Chase's dream of saving Zoë from the giant whirl in the ocean was nothing but a wishful dream. In reality, Chase Matthews was little more than a big coward and dork. But Chase had read stories and seen movies about shipwrecked adventurers. This was a long tradition in the history of literature, and one that had never stopped moving the hearts of the audience.

Among all those literary precursors, the most impressive influence on Chase's story had thusly been the work of **Edgar Allan Poe**, _one of the greatest and most adorable poets of the history of America_, titled _A Descent Into The Maelström_. The dork from the northeastern regions had read the story almost two years ago, and ever since his hair had started growing bushy and curly. He had been gifted the booklet by one of his uncles, who ran a shop selling fantasy stories.[6:4]

In Poe's story, an apparently old men tells wandering strangers about his experience as a young mariner caught in one of the mightiest whirls known to sailors, and how this adventure had changed him both physically and emotionally.

And Chase had already encountered an apparently old man on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy: One certain **Mr. Takato**[6:5] But he had been too scare to really talk to this obviously uncanny person, secure in the knowledge that Takato must really have experienced something on the veins of Poe's adventurer. In addition, Chase seemed to thionk that he had hallucinating, as nobody else on the campus had ever witnessed even the existence of Takato.

But, indeecd, I knew Takato from my times at Pacific Coast Academy, before my untimely end. Alas, this is not the time for talking about him in detail. I will mention him again somewhere later down the road.

In Chase's wishful thinking, he was the one to save Zoey, renamed to Zorca, from drowning in the maelstrom, something impossible in real life. But the bushy dweeb wanted to impress Zoë Brooks in some way, so he made a play from his nightly fantasies. He supposed himself to portray the heroic bay watch coming to Zorca's rescue, and Zoey — of course — to portray Zorca. He intended the final scene of the play to feature a kiss between himself and Zoë, or rather their respective characters. Summing it up, the whole play was only intended to serve one purpose — that of letting Chase kiss his dream girl.

* * *

**6:2:2 Start Of The Auditions**

Chase was so keen on acting as the bech hero, he did not even want anyone else to try out for that character. And he was convinced that only Zoey would be able to try out for the part of alien girl Zorca.

Only three other girls were willing to participate in the auditions for the character of Zorca:

One of them was singing instead of Zorca. The second one was shoputing instead of talking.

This was neither acceptable in the eyes and ears of Chase Matthews, nore those of Fletcher St. Troy.

Then there was transvested Mark Del Figgalo. he also wanted to try out for the female main rôle, but he was apparently in the wrong play, more precisely that from the last academic year.

And last but not least, Zoë Brooks stood on the stage, and she was totally impressive as the most charming alien girl. Well, she was not really a gifted actress of any stretch, but she happened to be able to perform very well as the character that had been modelled exactly in her likeness by the author of the script, videlicet Chase Matthews. And she was only participating because she had been persuaded into doing so by no other than Chase, and she still pitied the bushy dork.

Too bad for Chase: The bay watch guy had not been written in the likeness of a certain curly dweeb at all. And that would be a problem …

* * *

**6:2:3 An Unexpected Turn**

The first auditions had been completed.

Besides Zoey Brooks as the female star, also Nicole Bristow and Michael Barret were in the cast as minor characters with almost no text to learn.

This underlined the very fact that Chase had not invested any reasonable efforts in the creation of the side characters — due to his all-exclusive obsession with the possibility of making out with Zoë Brooks.

And now Logan Reese was trying out for the character that had been intended to be Chase's.

The bushy dork protested. "But you don't really like theatre."

Logan grinned. "You have claimed that theatre is cool. I am cool too. So theatre and I naturally belong together." Really, Logan had not changed at all his opinion about acting, and he only cared about the big screen that promised big time bucks. But he knew very well that Chase was hankering like an idiot after Zoë Brooks, and he wanted to hurt him as much as only possible by getting to kiss the Mary Sue right in front of a greater punlic, and also in front of Chase's eyes. At least he hoped that the playwright was forced to watch. But even imagining a large audience without Chase watch a perverted makeout scene of himselfd and Zoey would have made Logan Reese's heart squeal for joy — and embarrass Chase Matthews to the death. Logan still hated Zoë Brooks as muxch as he had done during the very first day of the latter's life on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy. But he would still try to get her to consent, as this would have been the death blow for Chase's fantasies.

Inspite of Chase's desperation, Fletcher St. Troy saw absolutely no reason for denying Logan Reese the right to try out for the character of the brave life guard.

Logan grinned into Chase's direction, and then he started reading the scene from the script in which he was facing the alien girl for the first time. His style of reading tyhe scene was quite formidable. The reason for this excellent performance was by no means Logan's acting skill. He had certainly learned a lot by watching his father's work, but the ultimate cause was the very fact that the character had been like tailor made for the son of the king of Hollywood.

Rewording it slightly: Logan Reese was the guy that Chase Matthews had dreamed to be for quite a while, a guy able to betwitch the girls with his looks and his fake charm.

St. Troy had no difficulties deciding on site: "Logan will be the life guard."

This judgment struck Chase's brain like a thunderbolt. He had worked hard on his play, just for the purpose of gettiong to kiss Zoey, and now, withing less than ten minutes, his dream of a cute scene with the blond Mary Sue had been converted into one of the worst horror trips he was able to imagine in his life.

Logan Reese grinned triumphantly.

Chase Matthews knew that he would have to do something about it, and there were only a few weeks left until the public performance. And he had not yet got any plan at all.

* * *

**6:3 How To Save The Play**

* * *

**6:3:1 To Kiss Or To Kill**

Immediately upon the auditions, Chase had tried hard to dissuade Zoë Brooks from participating as Zorca, but he refrained from telling her about the real reasons, especially his cantering jealousy, and his arguments were by absolutely no means convincing — quite the contrary: He confused his female friend more and more.

Zoey just shrugged and kept on moving.

Chase Matthews hoped now for Michael Barret's relieving support, but he was not sure where this would wind up.

Michael had to ponder for a while, but thgen he came up with some astonishingly easy suggestion:

Chase was the playwright, thus all he needed to do was to change the script again. And there was a totaly simple change: At the end of the play, the alien girl leant in to kiss the life guard. Changing _kiss_ to _kill_ was a simple modification with eclatant consequences.

Without a trace of hesitation, Chase approved of Michael's idea, and he was up to getting Zoë to slay the evil jerk riht on the stage!

* * *

**6:3:2 Fletcher Says No**

Unfortunately, Fletcher St. Troy was not exactly pleased by Chase's idea.

The bushy dweeb expalined that he had always problems telling those two letters appart. He pretended foolishly that he had recently mutilated _sassafras_ to _lallafral_. He also claimed that middle school kids should not kiss on the stage, this was totally inappropriate.

Unfortunately. Fletcher St. Troy refused to accept any of Chase's excuses.

Chase had not objected to the kissing scene when he had still been the lucky one destrined to kiss Zoey. Doing so by now was just plain hyposcrisy.

Also, a good artist was supposed to know when to lay down the pencil and call the work done.

With this verdict, Chase's life seemed to be over, and he was bound for a slow and painful death from within.

Or maybe there was stillone final straw up for grabs?

* * *

**6:4 Dustin's Cold**

* * *

**6:4:1 Quinn's Treatment**

While Zoë Brppks was busily practising for her upcoming performance as a cute alien girl, her little brother was bugged by some other problem, a more or less bad cold. He needed his elder sister's help, and thus he snuch into Butler Hall in order to look for her in her dormitory room.

Unfortunately, Zoey was away for theatre practice, and so was Nicole. This way, only Dana Cruz was left in 101 Butler Hall, and she was little pleased upon spotting the liuttle bugger in the hall way. Her anger increased rapidly when she sensed that Dustin was a bit sick, more or less. She did not want to miss out on cheerleading practice in the case of catching a cold. In addition, she had always hated Zoey's baby brother, Thus she looked at him in a deprecating manner, and she slammed her door shup and threatened Dustin to stay away from her dormitory room. In addition, she refused to inform Zoey.

Dustin was a bit desperate, because this meant that he was now feeling forced to go to the mursey right away, although the nurse was an evil dragon.

But in this moment, the door to Quinn Pensky's dormitory room went open. The geek princess of Seattle had heard the noises, both of Dana's rudeness and of Dustin's sneezes and coughs. She decided to cure Dustin from his ailments, or at least to try so, right on spot.

This would have saved him from getting harmed even further in the infirmary. He thereupon followed her instructions and got himself tied to one of the spare beds in Quinn's dormitory room. He had already served the crazy science freak as a test object, and that more than just once, so he did not feel all that much of a difference right now.

Quinn tried to use some modified vacuum cleaner, telling Dustin that she was about to suck the bacteria off his tongue. Really, she had not build this weird device in order to cure some cold, but she was hardly ever honest to her friends (falsely so-called) about the proper purpose of her inventions. Really, she had got quite dibious motivations to be reveiled upon a later opportunity.

Unfortunately, even after increasing the sucking capacity of the cleaner, Dustin's cold did not get any better. But this was by absolutely no means a surprise, because Duston's disease had been of a viral nature, and thus sucking bacteria would not have helped at all. In addition, the germs that were not on his tongue, but somewhere deep withing his lymphatic system and his blood circuit were not even touched by the vacuum cleaner.

But Quinn was not yet ready to give up. Indeed, she tried another cure. The tender souls of Dustin's bare feet were now treated with some sort of shocks that looked like blue flashes.

The treatment tickled and made Dustin laugh his face off, but it did not make his cough and his sneezing attacks disappear at all.

Of course, those strange fleshes had not been designed in order to cure anyone, but they were part and parcel of some other research exploring the human nervous system — one of her hobbies to be treated in detail later down the road.

* * *

**6:4:2 Eliminating Logan Reese**

Chase Matthews was now ready to do everything in order to get rid of his evil room mate Logan Reese. He was still the second choice for the male star character, and so he would replace him, just in case. Now he was meeting Dustin Brooks out on the campus, and he decided to o something utterly immoral: His plan was that of getting Logan catch the same cold as Dustin's. This would prevent the jerk from kissing Zoë Brooks and make him copmmit that deed instead.

In order to achieve this goal, Dustin was commanded to cough and to sneeze into the bed billow of Logan Reese. This way, the jerk would turn sick over night.

Dustin chimed in, but he required a little payment for his disgusting service.

* * *

**6:4:3 Zoey Changes Her Mind**

Zoey had not been happy about her character as alien girl Zorca. Granted, acting as an alien girl was a lot of fun for the charming Mary Sue, but she had figured that the drama club was sponsored by jerks even worse than Logan in his worst days. The whole background of the stage was full of hidden publicity for Pear Electronics and Qualitech.

And now Quinn told Zoey about Dustin's bad cough. "I have tried hard to cure him, but yet for no avail. Maybe I should …" she started to name a few possible activities with the goal of helping Dustin.

But Zoë Brooks shook her head. "No, you won't do anything like that. I will take care of my brother, in the same way grandmother had always taken care of me and of my mom when we were sick." She knew that it was possible to find a second choice for the rôle of Zorca, but there was no second choice for a sister for Dustin. She threatened Quinn, telling her to stop treating Dustin in dubious manners.

Quinn sighed deeply, but she did not see a way to stop the popular girl next door.

Zoey had got no time left, she needed to brew some herbal tea according to her grandmother's traditional family recipe in order to heal Dustin from his cold.

* * *

**6:4:4 Backfiring**

Chase Matthews was not yet aware of the fact that Zoë Brooks had givebn up on the acting job in order to take better care of Dustin, and thus he did not think about interrupting his mischievous plans.

Logan was using the top bunk, while Chase was accomodated in the bottom bunk.

The bed was close to the wall, but there was a gap broad enough to allow for the dangerous pillow to slip through and drop unluckily into Chase's bed.

The night was coming to an end, and Chase was wallowing in hhis bed, rubbing his nose closely over and over again against the pillow that was full of Dustin's malevolent germs. In the early morning, Chase would wake up with a bad cough …

Logan, on the other hand, was safe and sane, and he was totally looking forward to kissing the living hell out of Zoey's lips. Of course, he was not aware of the fact that the charming lady from Louisiana had already decided to do something else.

* * *

**6:5 The Première Performance**

* * *

**6:5:1 The Second Choice**

Fletcher St. Troy had already received the news about the absence of Zoë Brooks during the preceding night. He thought that Zoey would not need all day in order to take care of her brother, but it was likely that the number one for the rôle of the alien girl was now subject to some cold as well, and she could have infected Logan Reese during the kiss. He sighed deeply, because he had never rehearsed with the second choice.

Logan gasped. "What? No Zoë?"

Fletcher nodded sadly. "I hope you will behave as e've rehearsed it, no matter who is acting as Zorca."

Logan stammered painfully. "Yes, I will …"

A door opened in the back stage, allowing the second choice for the character of the alien maiden to enter.

Ashley Blake showed up, dressed fully as Zorca, complete with a pair of shiny antemnnas attached to her head. She had been recommended a few hours ago by her class pal Dustin Brooks. As a professional actress, she had not got any problems adapting to the rôle of Zorca. In addition, she was certainly up to a few modiifications, for — as a professional diva — she would get away with changing the script.

Logan went pale. His plan of kissing Zoë had failed miserably, and he was not willing to do that to Ashley, especially not in front of the eyes of overprotective Vincent Blake, the bully athlete par excellence. He knew that getting too close to the diva would inevitably get him into trouble.

* * *

**6:5:2 Improvisation**

The performance appeared to come along smoothly, until the point where Ashley was supposed to kiss Logan.

Fletcher St. Troy was looking forward to see the spicy scene, and he announced this to the spectators sitting nexxt to him.

But the diva pretended now to have read _kill_ instead of _kiss_. "Say your last words, earthling!"

Logan coughed. "Hey, if you spare my life, I will help you to enslave the rest of mankind, especially all those bushy dorks."

Ashley grinned. "Oh, Maybe … I will have to think about it. But until then you will have to wash my feet. The sand here is really dirty, nothing compared to my planet."

Logan moaned: "yeah, as you wish, mistress!" he moaned for disgust.

Fletcher moaned. "What is this? I have told Chase not to change the manuscript. A true artist would never do this. I will have to preach him some lesson, once he is back."

A voice in his back growled: "No, Fletcher, you will not do so!"

Fletcher St. Troy turned around, and now he was consternated. "Erwin! What are you doing here?"

Among other reasons, Malcolm had previously fired Fletcher St. Troy and Erwin Sikowitz from his cast because they argued too much off the scenes.

Sikowitz explained: "I am the private actinbg coach of Miss Blake, and I taught her the art of improvisations. Now I am here in order to see what she has learned."

St. Troy choked. "What? Nobody has ever learned anything form you!"

The arguments went on and on, forcing Dean Carl Rivers to intervene.

Indeed, one of the reason why Erwin Sikowitz and Fletcher St. Troy had been fired from their cast by Malcolm Reese was the fact that they argued too much during the work. And of course their current demeanour was absolutely no recommendation persuading Malcolm into giving them another chance in any of his upcoming productions.

Suddenly, Ashley Blake coughed and choked, and she went totally pale.

Logan looked worried, but then he remarked: "It is only a common cold, it will pass after a week."

Ashley had to correct him. "For us Zorquesians, this disease is deadly, as we don't have the genes to overcome the germs."

Logan looked around. "You need some herbal tea will do " He kicked Michael's butt hard. "Go and get her some infusion against her cold, or I will kick you again, harder!"

Michael wondered, "why would I do that?"

Logan grunted: "Because I am your master, and you are my servant." He kicked him again. "Now get your lazy butt to the tea kicthen!"

Michael was gone.

Dean Rivers sighed. "I like this inscenation. You are?"

Erwin Sikowitz introduced himself.

Michael was back with a cup of herbal tea, and he snuck away from Logan as fast as possible as he did not want to risk having to feel his hardened boot again between his hind cheeks.

Logan fed the warm liquid to Ashley. "This will help you, and you will soon feel better again."

Ashley sighed for relief, and she kissed Logan's cheeks all innocently. "Yeah, it does, and I feel that we should leave this planet where everyone but you is vulgar and ugly."

Logan carried Ashley away, and they commanded the stage workers to lower the curtain.

Dean Rivers applauded the actors full force. "What a play! And this is called improvisation?"

Sikowitz nodded solemnly. "I am teaching this over at Hollywood School For The Professional Performance Arts."

Dean Rivers offered Sikowitz to do the same also here at Pacific Coast Academy, for some extra salary, "Fletcher St. Troy, you are no longer responsible for this drama club. Go and work full time on the choreography for the cheerio squad and the school ballet, and who knows what, but refrain from teaching acting!"

Fletcher was disappointed, but he had to be lucky for not having been fired completely and just been assigned new priorities.

* * *

**6:5:3 Aftermath**

During the play, Logan had feared that Ashley Blake had been really sick, and that he was now contaminated, but this was fortunatly not the case.

Ashley was perfect in this kind of acting, as she had already demonstrated in her Oscar-awarded movies.

Dustin was now healthy again, and he had to thank Zoey for taking care of him. But he was sad because Zoey had to miss out on the play for his sake.

Alas, Zoey did not really mind. Thinking that she would almost have been forced to kiss Logan Reese still made her head hurt a lot.

The whole drama involving was now over, but fortunately, the drama club was not the only source of live entertainment on the campus.

* * *

**6:6 Dramatic Mark**

A few days later, Zoë Brooks had helped Quinn Pensky to getb a date with a boy chosen by the geek princess, and this guy was no other than aforementioned ultradork Mark Del Figgalo.[6:6]

Quinn did not really dare to talk to him directly, until told to do so by the blond Mary Sue. But even that,m she scared him away by talking about her impending biological and medical experiments for which she needed some examples of his desoxyribonucleic acid, of which Quinn was so much fascinated.

This time, Chase's freshly discovered skilles in improvisational acting were excessively welcome. He would never have tried to develop these abilities any further without the recent intervention of acting coach Erwin Sikowitz, the successor of Fletcher St. Troy who was a fanatic for scripts set forever in stone: totally inflexible and boringly stubborn.

This improvisational acting had been successful, although Mark Del Figgalo had already had another girlfriend, a certain **Courtney Simmons**.[6:7]

The latter was not a student at Pacific Coast Academy, and definitely not a notorious wallflower, so you will probably wonder why such a girl was aboput to date a rather withdrawn and uncomely guy like Mark Del Figgalo. Indeed, Courtney was a pupil from nearby aforementioned girls-only boarding school Northridge. This was the reason why she had hardly been seen on the campus and was almost completely unbeknownst to about each and every other student at Pacific Coast Academy. The same was even more valid for her relationship with Mark Del Figgalo.

For many years, Pacific Coast Academy had been southern California' leading prep school for boys, while Northridge had been the same for girls. Due to the former's switch to coeducation, the above symmetry and balance had been broken apart. In the eyes of Northridge, this move was also seen as a one-sided cancellation of some outstanding tacit truce between those two elitarian educational institutions who were close rivals for the attention of a certain range of vital sponsors.

Certainly, a girl like Courtney Simmons would never have voluntarily dated someone like Mark Del Figgalo, she had been pushed into doing so by certain members in the administration of Northridge. Courtney had participated as a guest at somne event at Pacific Coast Academy during the previous academic year, where she had encountered Mark for the first time.

Nobody at Pacific Coast Academy was aware of the fact that Courtney, commanded by elders of Northridge, had inscenated a perfect drama, and that the latter were now going to plan more actions of sabotage in order to damage their rival's market shares and improve thusly their own.

* * *

**Chapter 7 Drake Parker**

* * *

**7:1 The start Of Drake's Career**

Now it is time to talk more about the shooting star of the Californian teenage rock scene in the year of 2004. Drake Parker used to be a normal teenager from San Diego, well, he had never been one of these, he had always been a jerk, at least in the eyes of his aforementioned sister Megan. But he rose from anonymity to popularity among the — especially female — teenage popluation of San Diego and even the greater Los Angeles area almost over night.

His step brother **Joshua Nichols** had unintentionally injured the hand of **Devin Malone**,[7:1]_the lead singer of pop rock band __**Zero Gravity**_.

Drake had replaced Devin during one of the concerts, and he had immediately convinced the audiance and the whole band. Before that, he had already performed in smaller circles, including talent shows[7:2] at his own school, **Belleview**. Granted, he still had not landed a contract with some renowned record label, but he was certainly dreaming of such a thing.

* * *

**7:2 Drake's Disease**

Unfortunately, the teenage rock superstar suffered from several ailments, both mental and physical.

On the mental side, there was his excessive jerkishness, not as bad as Logan's, though. He switched girls faster than this underwear, and he boasted with it allover the county of San Diego. There was probably nothing to do about this kind of perversity.

His physical ailments were of another kind altogether: Drake was addicted to cheap and dirty snacks, both of the sweet and of the spicy sort.[7:3]

Joshua Nichols, his step brother, was likewise addicted to video gaming, especially the new and improved game sphere.

That's why both of the foul step brothers had started a bet about their ability of giveing up on their respective obsessions. They abused little Megan in a shameless manner as a witness for that bet.

During the bet, it turned out that Drake Parker suffered from a weird and rare disease that would turn his skinn into a mess unless fed regularly with tasty snacks. The diagnosis had been issued correctly by Doc Glazer Brooks.

By the way, neither Drake nor Josh had been able to keep their promises and thus lost the bet, but this is a different issue altogether. But this did not matter at all, it was more important to find a cure for his disease.

The only person able to prevent Drake's skin from destroying itself slowly was — at least according to Glazer's judgment — Quinn Pensky. The supreme geek princess of Seattle was put in charge with this task, and she had already performed her first experiments on various test patients, videlicet randomly chosen fellow students such as Dustin Brooks. She had expected that Zoey's baby brother , after years of excessive conspumption of candy, was also about to start showing the same symptoms of the disease as Drake Parker, turning any attempt of a withdrawal into a dermatological catastrophe.

* * *

**7:3 Impending Spring Fling**

* * *

**7:3:1 The Organising Committee**

Each year, the students celebrated the end of winter with a party known as the great spring fling, if it is rightfull to call this a celebration. This tradition dated back to my days at Pacific Coast Academy.

The main reason was the globally valid fact that a good party required good music, something like a popular rock star or band, and not some lame group of cheap wannabe stars with no talent, as had been the case in my days.

The school's admin had never contributed much to a successful spring fling, thusly forcing the students to be responsible enough for organising the whole spring fling on their own.

The boys had apparently always sucked in this job, and thus it was now the girls' time to do so.

For that reason, it was now better for the students at Pacific Coast Academy to leave this business in the hands of girls, and especially in the hands of the one and only girl able to manage it all, videlicet Zoë Brooks. Of course the Mary Sue from Louisiana was not going to organise the whole event on her own, but she had chosen her room mates as her closest helpers.

Nicole Bristow was not quite aware of the responsibility the spring fling team was burdened with, and she was excited beyong any measure.

Dana Cruz did not really care, and she just wanted to get done with it as fast as only possible.

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret hoped that Zoey did the right thing. They remembered the last two spring flings, and those had sucked completely. They had consisted in eating luke warm hot-dogs and listening to some excessively lame band.

And Zoey Brooks opened the begin of her job as a party organiser by announcing whom she had chosen for the upcoming celebrations: No other than shooting star Drake Parker.

Nicole Bristow was totally enthusiastic, as she had seen pictures of Drake proving him as an extremely cute boy. She even loved that lad, or so she said. It was of course rather an insane obsession, typical for ditzy bimbo girls like Nicole.

* * *

**7:3:2 The Price Is High**

Zoey had already contacted **Keith Bators**,[7:4] the perverted manager of Drake Parker.

Keith required five thousand bucks for a performance of Drake and his band at an event for students.

Unfortunately, that much money did not exactly grow on the trees, as we had seen that most students were forced to make savings every now and then, including Zoë.

Nicole was unfortunately not really aware of the implications of the price label, but that was nothing unusual.

Of course there were students that could easily afford a few thousands of bucks, and one of them was even known sufficiently well unto Zoey Brooks, Dana Cruz, and Nicoel Bristow: Logan Reese's weekly pocket change consisted of some thousand bucks at least. Yet he was by absolutely no means willing to contribute to the fling: He considered Drake Parker a dangerous competitor for the girls at Pacific Coast Academy, and he was not even wrong there.

There was a huge amount of professional envy among the jerks.

The blond Mary Sue from Louisiana was thus forced to look for other sources in order to accumulate the amount of bucks required for paying Drake Bell and his band.

Before any good idea showed up, Dustin Brooks entered the lounge of Butler Hall. He had heard about his sister's cool plans, and he wanted to listen to the powerful sound of Drake Bell as well. And now he produced twenty dollars from his pockets and donated then for the good cause of hiring the gratest teenage rock band of the day.

Of course Zoë Brooks remembered excessively well how often her baby brother was out of money, and now she was suspicious. "Where is your money from?"

Dustin grinned, and he mentioned in a straightforward manner that he had been paid by Quinn for an ongoing experiment.

Zoë gasped, as she knew that this was no good at all. But she was unable to dissuade Dustin.

So what was Quinn's experiment involving Dustin all about?

* * *

**7:4 Sleep Withdrawal**

* * *

**7:4:1 Reasons For The Research**

Quinn was very much interested in testing the limits of the human nervous system and in pushing the frontiers forward into the next millennium. Her ambitions had been stoked even more when employed by Glazer Brooks as a deputy.

There had already been a huge variety of experiments conducted by Seattle's greatest scientific talent — ever — in this area of research.

When Zoey Brooks was submitted to electrodes spread all over her head in order to monitor her sleep. it had been part of this long series of experiments for the purpose of examining the possibilities for the ultimate perfection of the human brain. Of course she had not been happy about this, but she had not been by any means able to prevent Quinn Pensky from doing what she felt chosen to do.

Quinn was trying several ways to make human drop asleep or unconscious — a big difference in her eyes. She needed to obtaion some detailled knowledge about those limits of human awareness in order to find ways to push bypass or cancel them.

Her favourite method had originally been that of pinching elbows, by applying transversial pressure to certain nerves.[7:5] It had got the advantage of being simple and not requiring any devices or ingredients, but it had got the advantage of being hard to measure.

When the boys had perverted the outside of Butler Hall and the girls were looking for revenge, Quinn had come up with another great idea: She wanted to build a bomb in order to knock the evil guys unconscious on site. Of course, Quinn would even have been able to build a nuclear bomb, but this would have been an overkill. Quinn just wanted to teach those decadent lads a lesson. The bomb would have emitted ultrasonic wave, at a frequency at which, according to Quinn's studies, thehuman brain interrupted partially its activities.

Zoë Brooks had fortunately been able to calm down the female mob, and thus the action of revenge had not taken place, but this was by absolutely no means a reason for Quinn to stop her research on said bomb.

Indeed, Quinn had already tested the bomb on a bunch of students, both male and female, with eclatant success: The kids were not able to remember anything afterwards.

Of course, this bomb would have been useful for various purposes, more precisely: Whenever you wanted to temprarily disabilitate a huge bunch of people without damaging them permanently.

The police of Los Angeles would certainly be interested in buying those bombs off Quinn, thusly financing Quinn's further research on this fascinating field.

Later on, Quinn would also mix various potions with a similar but even more controllable effect. Of course she would never admit outright to the purpose of her research, and — for that vail — she would have to tarnish her inventions as random artifacts of her curiosity.

And now it is time to move on to her current subproject involving Dustin Brooks:

* * *

**7:4:2 Dustin's Torture**

Dustin Brooks was submitted to long term sleep withdrawal in order to test the progresses she had made in a previous experiment that consisted in treating Dustin with chemicals. The goal was that of making Dustin sleepwalk at whim.

Quinn had attached a shock bracelet to one of Dustin's arms.

Whenever he was too close to sleeping, a spark would make him twitch for pain, and thusly prevent him from falling actually asleep.

Quinn had made a checklist of things that should happen to Dustin after a certain durion of sleep withdrawal, such as distorted sensoric perception and hallucinations. The former invoilved testing his reactions to cold by filling his pants surprisingly with ice cubes, and his audition by yelling into his ear with a horn.

Only after his perception had deteriorated to some suffivcient degree, and after he was no longer able to tell reality from hallucinations, would she have stiopped the withdrawal and disabled his shock bracelet, making him fall asleep. At that point, Dustin was supposed to be ready to sleepwalk and sleep talk.

Of course Zoë was by absolutely no means pleased by these plans, but she did not know everything about it, and she was definitely too busy to care about. She would regret and rue this later on, but for now, there were apparetly higher priorities for her attention.

* * *

**7:5 Raising Funds**

* * *

**7:5:1 Ideas For Making Bucks**

Nicole Bristow wanted to make a kissing booth. "I volunteer, but I will only kiss the cute boys."

Zoë was not very happy upon her best friend's suggestion. "You don't think that you may pick the raisins and still make money this way? Sorry, but that is nort how things work. By the way … I hate raisins![7:6] So, if someone like Del Figgalo pays you for a kiss in the frame of your kissing booth, you have to kiss him, whether you want it or not."

Nicole looked dumbfunded. "Ouch! I would have to puke." She coughed and choked, going as pale as can be. Finally, she had to vomit, covering Dana's shoes with a penetrant stink.

Dana Cruz suggested: "Nicole! I am going to bash your skull with something hard …" She was held back by Zoey.

Nicole screamed in agony and ran away.

Dana grunted: "Many boys like trashing things. How about bashing melons?" Of course she would have loved to trash more than just a few of things, being Nicole's skull or a bunch of melons did not make much of a difference for the bully Latina.

Zoey called Nicole back into theur room, but she failed miserably in her first attempt and had to run after the ditzy wench from the state of the dusty planes.

Nicole returned after five minutes, and she sighed. "My dad sells melon juice. What a waste …" She noticed Dana's wrathful gaze. "but this is business." She sighed deeply, although she did not believe that cute boys could be so cruel to melons.

Zoë accepted Dana's idea, but she forget that melons cost a lot of money, and that they had to buy them first. The costs would have to be deducted from the profit of the fundraising action, thusly reducing the success of the event.

Then they moved on to the classic fundraiser: Washing the cars of the teachers and the senior for a little fee.

Zoey did not know much about cars, and she hoped thusly for the help of Chase Matthews and of Michael Barret.

In addition, car washing was not without more or less inevitable expenses: They would be forced to pay for the used water, soap, and whatever was necessary for polishing such a vehicle. Needless to say, this would reduce the efficiency of the fundraising action even more.

Unfortunately, Zoë and her friends were not aware of a recent disaster at nearby James K. Polk upon a similar car wash action.[7:7] Otherwise they would have changed their minds on site.

There was still one idea left for Zoey:

The cool girl from Louisiana could deploy her fashion design skills to a good use by making a bunch of t-shirts with an excessively cool logo of Drake Parker and his band. Of course she would have to pay lots of bucks for the raw shirts and for the ink, and she could not hope for much support from her friends. Finding kids to buy the shirts off her — on the other hand — would hardly be a problem, giving the rising popularity of the teenage rock star.

* * *

**7:5:2 Drake Shirts**

Zoey's first public display of her fashion design skills on our campus had been upon aforementioned talent show, winning it thusly by a landslide, along with Nicole Bristow.

Unfortunately, she did not really have a great occasion for her extreme talent, although she had found several occasions.

This was especially the case during aforementioned advertisement project for Qualitech.

More precisely, Zoey Brooks had produced designs for outfits to wear during the shootings of the comercial. Unfortunately, she had made a big mistake by exaggerating the proportions of the designed gowns:

The outfits were apparetly only suited for exzcruciatingly busty girls, and there were none of those right here at Pacific Coast Academy.

* * *

**7:5:3 Asking For Permission**

* * *

**7:5:3:1 No Clowns Allowed**

In order to be allowed to perform the fundraising actions, Zoey and her friends needed to request a permit for using the campus, and especially the water for the car wash. Of course they would also have to declare that they would take over all costs for cleaning the campus afterwards and paying the costs for the water.

Finally, Dean Rivers crossed their way, wondering what the group of girls was up to.

Nicole Bristow fell on her knees in order to beg the headmaster, but she did not say for what.

Zoë Brooks told Nicole to refrain from begging like a bimbo. "Aske first, then you may beg!"

Dean Rivers did not care, so he allowed for the fling and the actions prepared by the girls, probably secure in the knowledge that it would be a lame event, anyways. But there was one important condition to fulfill: He did not allow the kids to get any clown involved in the whole fund raising activity.

The girls promised to exclude clowns from participating in the fund raising events, and thus they were duly granted a pass for preparing them on site.

Dean Rivers was apparently afraid of clowns, and there was of course a reason for this: Thirty years ago, he had had a terrible nightmare where he was proscribed by some clown.

Upon finding out, his room mates had started making fun of his fears, and this phobia was passed on from one generation of Pacific Coast Academy high school kids to the next one.

So, what had been the trigger for Carl Rivwers's nightmare?

Aforementioned Edgar Allan Poe had once written a horror poem, going by the title _The Raven_. Poe says:

**_"_**  
And the silken, sad, uncertain rustling of each purple curtain  
Thrilled me — filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before.  
**_"_**

The raven was often interpreted as a messenger of bad news, in particular the impending death of a beloved person.

Carl Rivers had to read _The Raven_ in English classes, and he had never overcome the uncanny feeling from these lines. Little later, he had got a dream about being visited by a clown, and the atmosphere of the dream had been comparable to that of the poem: The description of the room in that poem matched with his dream, and the clown's laughter had been like the rustling sounds caused by heavy curtains.

A clown is wearing a fantastic mask, hiding the plain face, just like a curtain hides the outside from observers the inside, and vice versa. Thus a curtain may be seen as a mask for whatever is on the other side of a window.

This was the beginning of the principal's irrational fear of clowns.

There had already been some therapists trying hard to fix Carl Rivers's panic reactions to the appearance of clowns, and some of them had been superficially successful, such as **Marty Klemish**,[7:8] the school shrink of Pacific Coast Academy. But none of them had ever understood the connection with Poe's _Raven_.

* * *

**7:5:3:2 Garth Berman**

A few minutes had passed by since Carl Rivers had disappeared from sight, and the girls were already looking forward to starting theactivities in order to be able to afford Drake's visit.

A not so unimpressive vehicle was halted close to them at the parking lot for the administration and the officials, attracting immediately the girls' attention.

A man in his early thirties left the car and walked up to, and almost past, Zoey, Nicole, and Dana, greeting them casually. Upon some reaction, he introduced himself as **Garth Berman**, executove chairman of the board of Pacific Coast Academy.[7:9]

The girls were impressed, even more when they saw a tattoo attorning one of Berman's arms, a stingray.

This proved that Berman was not only an important member of Pacific Coast Academy's hierarchy, but also an alumnus of this most elitarian boarding school.

The girls wondered what an executive chairman was doing.

Berman replied in a funny way, but really, Berman was not as powerful as the title of his job made him appear. He was only responsible for the correct protocol of the sessions of the board, and he had little influence on the decisions of this committee. But he was an high ranked employee in the hierarchy of the enterprise that he represented in the board's committees, anyways.

The girls told Berman about the impending spring fling and their attempts of hiring Drake Parker.

Berman grinned, and he wished them good luck, as he remembered all those lame parties back when he had studied at this school. Then he walked away, and he produced a clown's costume from a bag. He was up to annoying Dean Rivers and talk about some administrative measures to be taken.

* * *

**7:6 Stopping Quinn**

Garth Berman had been very nice, but Zoë Brooks knew very well that he was basically a member of the board of sponsors, and thus a part of the system that she had recently started turning suspicious of.

This way, the blond Mary Sue was reminded to the fact that she had already recently neglected her brother Dustin just in order to work for a performance of the drama club that was sponsored by Qualitech and others using Pacific Coast Academy for selfish purposes. Clearly, she did not want to upsey anyone. But she knew that her brother was once more in danger, and once more from the hands of Quinn Pensky, and thus she decided to intervene in order to help her baby brother.

Unfortunately, she was thusly forced to neglect the fundraising action. Really, she had not been feeling at ease due to the planning of those activities, properly because she had got remorses for letting Dustin down, and so she had flunked the preparations for the fundraising days, wreaking more and more insane havoc.

Zoë Brooks was really infuriated when she saw the geek girl down the hall torturing poor little Dustin in a bestialic manner. "Take off his shock bracelet," she commanded in an excessively brash manner.

Quinn complained, "but I have already paid him for …"

Zoey thundered, "you will get your stinking money back soon, but now you better free Dustin, or else …" Her voice betrayed that she meant serious business.

Quinn sighed deeply when she had to release her miserable and extremely pitiful prisoner, and she walked away silently.

Zoë Brooks took her brother into her arms. |Sorry for not having taken care of this earlier on!"

Dustin was very tired, but he was still able to tell his sister about the details."

The blond Mary Sue shuddered upon listening to her brother's attempted report. Then she carried him to his dormitory room, letting him sleep for a few hours. She feared that Dustin would not really appreciate her intervention.

* * *

**7:7 New Plans**

* * *

**7:7:1 Megan Parker And Her Friends**

Unfortunately, there was no way to take up again all the planned yet poorly prepared and thought through fund raising activities.

Nicole was bitterly disappointed for that reason, fearing that she would have to forget about ever meeting dream boy Drake.

But Dustin had got an idea. "Drake's sister Megan has got a few friends at Pacific Coast Academy, and they are all in my classes." He explained that with these contacts, they would probably not get the whole band of Drake, but one of Drake's solo performances would have been totally impressive, too.

Zoey smiled. "You think that his sister may convince him?"

Dustin told his sister about the massive amount of pranks Megan used to submit Drake to. "She will torture him into coming hereto, just as Quinn has tormented me with the shock bracelet."

Zoey shook her head, because she did not want Drake to get hurt, so she restricted the range of applicable means to those that did not hurt anyone.

The friends Dustin was talking about were aforementioned Ashley Blake and Wendy Gellar, and it was impossible for Dustin to talk about them without having to blush a little bit.

The latter had enrolled at Pacific Coast Academy only for this second academic term, and the reason for this was properly Drake Parker. More precisely, she had previously developed a deadly obsessive crush on Drake, and she had not yet been able to get over with it, although she seemed to have calmed down. Thus a boarding school appeared to be the best solution in order to get her back onto the feet, and Pacific Coast Academy was simply the best.

Dustin had already been an undying fan of Ashley Blake and her movies — simply because the latter had been made exactly for kids of his age. He was thus not alone there, but joined by his room mates Jacob Ross and **Henry Nolston**.[7:10] But they were treated like dirt by the ice cold diva. And since Zoey's baby brother had fgured that Wendy was the girl that had created the wonderful tune off which he had based the song he had performed in front of the campus cinema, he was also a bit into that girl.

But as Wendy had still only got eyes for Drake, she simply made fun of Dustin's humble attempts of asking her out. This way, she must have hurt his feelings really badly.

Zoë Brooks failed to notice Dustin's insecurity towards those two girls of his age, and she did not really trust the situation, anyways. She knew that Ashley was colder than the iceberg sinking the Titanic, and she did not see a way that they could make a deal with the elementary school kids without having to pay dearly in turn, maybe more than five thousand bucks. But, after all, she had already promised unto too many kids, especially her best friend Nicole, to get Drake Parker to perform on the campus, and she was not someone to break promises lightly, so using the elementary school girls was probably the last straw for the Mary Sue to grab.

* * *

**7:7:2 Negotiations**

Wendy Gellar did not really need to be persuaded, as she was totally interested in seeing Drake again as soon as possible. Even more, she wished as strongly as can be to get him to perform a song whose tune she had written. She had hitherto seen Zoey Brooks only as a competing fangirl of Drake Parker and as the annoying elder sister of no less annoying Dustin. But now she was about to change her mind about the charming Mary Sue.

Ashley Blake was a different case. First. she had befriended Logan Reese, and she knew very well why the latter was opposed to sponsoring ta guest concert of Logan Reese. In addition, she was looking back to personal troubles with Drake, although she admired guys like Drake in general for their uncompromising will to make it to the big stage and to attract the attention of the broad masses. The reason for this problem went back to a recent visit of Ashley Blake to Première Theater in Dan Diego. The lunatic diva reported:

**_"_**  
Helen Baxter and my producer had organised a première Party down there, upon the first public performance of my latest movie.

Originally, my brother **Miles Blake**[7:11] had worked as my personal assistant, but he had flunked it badly, and then it was necessary to dispose with him.

Helen had commanded that disgusting dweeb named Joshua Nichols to perform the duties as my new assistant.

This way, I came to meet Drake and Megan Parker as well.

But Josh is a complete dork and inept assistant. The pervert gave me a much too cold cup of water to drink, and he was unable to provide me with soy latte. And his head is too disgustingly big …

Appalled by Drake and Josh, I befriended their little sister Megan and started hanging out with her right before the party.

We planned a few funny prasnks on the guys, or, as she calls them, boobs.

But then I got myself injured, and then a certain Doctor Glazer had to put me to sleep, using a syringe.

Drake and Josh dragged me asleep to the party, and they had to answer the journalists' questions. Then they stuffed me into a trash bin.

**_"_**

Ashley looked at Zoë Brooks and Dustin in a woeful manner.

The blond Mary Sue was a bit scared. But she somewhat sensed that both Ashley and Drake were very questionable idols. She knew that neither of them would have a good influence on Dustin, and that Megan Parker would most likely incite Dustin to turning sassy with her. But she knew even more that she would lose most of her popularity, abnd especially her friendship with girls like Nicole Bristow, if she dropped her plans to get Drake to perform on the campus.

Ashley's help had certainly her price. The little diva knew that Zoë had prepared shirts with Drake's logo in order to distribute them on the campus for the purpose of raising funds. For that reason, she required that the charming blonde designed a bunch of shirts and pants advertising Ashley and her movies.

Zoey sighed deeply, as it appeared as a fair price, and because she usually enjoyed designing fashion a lot. But she knew that she would have to be extremely careful, especially with respect to Dustin. But she was also dismayed upon hearing that her uncle Glazer had treated Ashley, and he feared that Zoey would start to hate the whole Brooks family when she heard about the family connections.

On the other hand, Ashley admitted that she was grateful because Drake and Josh had saved her from having to answer to the inquisitive journalists, also known as paparazzi, because she really hated being bothered by those mobs that were by no stretch whatsoever worthy of even touching the ground underneath her feet.

* * *

**7:8 The Concert On The Campus**

* * *

**7:8:1 Drake's Arrival**

Megan Parker had succesfully persuaded Drake into appearing on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy for a spring fling concert, and she had not even needed to pull some vicious pranks on him. But of course she had got her price as well.

The great day had come, and Zoë Brooks was standing at the campus entrance in order to await big Drake. She was accompanied by cheerfully excited Nicole Bristow. Honestly, the blond Mary Sue would have given up on the whole partyu stuff, had it not been in order to please her otherwise thoroughly disappointed ditzy room mate.

Drake was not accompanied by his band, but only by his step brother Joshua.

In addition, Megan Parker had snuck into the cargo space and was hidden between Drake's guitar and other equipment. She was up to visiting her friends Ashley and Wendy, but maybe she would commit even more stupidities or so. There was basically nothing she did not consider doing while having the supreme opportunity of strolling the campus of a school with so many cool kids.

Finally, the great moment was there, and Drake Parker exited from his car, waving around in order to greet all the girls hankering after him like crazy.

Nicole Bristow was of course the most impatient of all the female onlookers, and she did not waste any moment by jumpin straight into Drake Parker's arms. The she wrapped hwer arms around his throat, and she almost choked him while trying to smooch the living hell out of the future rock legend.

Dana Cruz had to grab the ditzy wench and pull her off the teenage rock star. "Shut up, Bristow, or I will …"

Nicole moaned: "Ouch! Sorry, I was just stung by a bee, or something like that."

Dana examined Nicole's hindside. "I will sting you with some poison syringe if you don't refrain from talking nonsense."

Zoey shook hands with Drake. She was lucky because she had been able to hire him without using the sponsors' support, although what she had heard about this jerk was not really encouraging. Then she gave him a sample of the Drake shirts she had desined for the purpose of the fundraising, and which she now dedicated to the huge superidol.

When Josh opened the back door in order to take ouyt Drake's guiter, Megan jumped out of the car and raced away. "Thanks, guys, pick me up after the concert!" Then she was gone in order to join Ashley and Wendy.

Drake grunted, "oh Megan" and he sighed deeply while shouldering his guitar. Seeing the shirts, he felt thatb thye were worth a lot more than just a solo concerts, for a good design was valued in general several thousansds of bucks. But he would ask Zoë for details later on.

Wayne "Firewire" Gilbert had at the same time completed the adjustment of the big microphone and the boom boxes needed in order to make Drake's solo performance in front of the mass of excited onlookers possibly.

* * *

**7:8:2 Greatest Party — Ever!**

The kids were waiting eagerlym but there was one superhuge drawback:

Drake's concert was not approved by his aforementioned manager Keith Bators, and thus Drake was not allowed to perform any of his regular songs he sang upon events organised by said Keith.

These songs included some of the most popular titles that the students had been looking forward to listening to, such as _Highway To Nowhere_ and _Only Time_.[7:12]

Instead, he Megan had forced him to perform some more works composed by Wendy Gellar, with texts by Adelaide Singer, her great friend from the other end of the country.

In the first hour, the reaction of the fan girls and some guys weretedious, because they had really hoped to hear the professionally puffed up songs by great Drake. This was especially the case for Nicole Bristow.

But noon coming, the opinions started to change, and the audience was getting more and more accustomed to the brilliant lyrics of Addie and the charming tunes by Wendy.

At least Wendy Gellar was here on the campus, and she was now harvvesting a lot of applause.

But Addelaide Singer was still living in northeastern regions of the United States Of America, and there had been no time for her to make it to this concert.

Fortunately, Megan Parker and Wayne Gilbert took pictures of the performance, and they uploaded them almost immediately, allowing for Addie to watch her songs getting performed.

Some of the kids wanted to meet Adelaide life on the campus, but this was not going to be easy, as the latter was only ready to visit California during the holidays. But maybe there was a way to organise something?

* * *

**7:8:3 Aftermath Of The Concert**

Quinn pensky had been prevented rudely by Zoë Brooks from completimng her studies involving Dustin's sleep withdrawal, but this fact had given her the opportunity to complete her works on some other experiment a lot faster. More precisely, she had completed the cure for Drake's disease, and she was now ready to treat the young superidol.

Although the concert was over, many kids wanted to watch the medical treatment.

Quinn announced: "Drake Parker needs to get injected some of this liquid every other day!" She held up a bottle containing some creepy-looking liquid. "I have instructed Megan Parker into giving him the syringe on a daily base. It is a rather painful injection involving some sensitive body parts, so only some very careful person may perform it."

Megan grinned mischievously, making Drake tremble for increasing disgust.

But jerkish Drake, inspite of not ooking forward to being stung by Megan with a huge syringe, addressed Zoey, because he still felt that she deserved a bigger reward for the Drake shirt. "How about a candle light dinner for two in some …"

The resident Mary Sue shook her head. "I only accept rewards that are good for the whole community of Pacific Coast Academy students."

Drake looked aghast, because he was not really accustomed to getting turned down.

Zoey scratched her head. "We still haven't got any decent school band, and thus we will need occasionally to hire some musical backup. We will be glad if you do this from time to time. Is that required too much?"

Drake sighed deeply. "Certainly not!" He looked around, seeing masses of girls hankering after him. Likewise, he was looking forward to seeing many of them once again.

The sun was about to set, and the kids from San Diego had still got a ride of more than two hours in order to return to their own place.

Megan grinned when entering her brother's car, secure in the knowledge that she was going to return to Pacific Coast Academy sopon again in order to wreak some decent amount of havoc.

* * *

**Chapter 8 The Apple Came Down**

* * *

**8:1 Music For The Girls' Lounge**

Drake Parker's concert had been a plain success, but it was unfortunately not possible for the kids to keep him for good on the campus, although down to Zoey's negotiations, they were secure in the knowledge to see him soon again.

In order to make up for these shortcomings, the girls wanted a boom box in their lounge in order to hear their favourite pop rock tunes whenever they wanted to.

Unfortunately, those they had ordered from the regional Pear Store did not really work. Dana Cruz and Zoey Brooks immediately tried hard to repair the faulty devides, but they were about to fail as miserably as can be, as they lacked appropriate knowledge of electronics and accoustics.

Of course their were a frew students at Pacific Coast Academy able to repair the whole boom box, but none of these — especially not Wayne Gilbert alias Fire Wire — were trustworthy in the eys of Zoë Brooks, barring Quinn Pensky.

Miles Brody would most likely have been able to repair the whole junk as well, but Zoey refrained from even thinking about asking him, as she feared that he would required some sort of payment for it, and this time around he would not be content with one date with Nicole Bristow, but become a whole lot greedier. Zoey still owed her best friend a year of laundry service and homework, and she did not want to increase her debts any further.

Quinn Pensky, on the other hand, was totally busy with some other research, and thus she did not really have the time necessary for repairing those boom boxes. You will soon see why this was the case.

* * *

**8:2 Cue Pops And Backpacks**

Drake Parker and Dustin Brooks were not the only persons in southern California suffering from the snack withdrawal disease:

After perferctioning the tests, Quinn Pensky had realised that Nicole Bristow was among them as well, and it was like a ticking time bomb, unless the cure of the syndrome was to be perfectioned later on.

Nicole's most recent obsession — besides cute boys — were so-called **cue pops**:[8:1]. Those candies were now sold in the general campus store of Pacific Coast Academy, a popular spot checked oput regularly by many students, whether they needed to buy something or not was of little relevance. Nicole spotted them immediately, and she was even able to make out different flavours. It was not hard for her to make her choice.

The same shop also offered a few journals for teenagers and younger kids.

Michael Barret and Chase Matthews, for example, were studying some chitchat journal properly suited for girls. They justified themselves by their wish of wanting to understand girls better. And now thye were taking one of those cheap and dirtyy personality tests with multiple choice. They had to answer questions like "what would you do if …"

But Zoey did not fall for their excuses, because she sensed correctly that they were nowhere near serious when talking about them.

For examples, the boys had actually stated that started that they would push their best friend down a staircase for borrowing their lip gloss without asking.

Zoey deemed her male friends really sick for that. But she would later on remember the answer, and this would be no fun at all … on the other hand, Zoey compared eating braisins with eating shrimpling old people, and this sounded no less sick.

OK, Nicole had chosen her cue pops, and she wanted to demonstrate their usage unto Zoey who had never heard about them. She squeezed one of the pops, making their content squirt across the shop and hit one of the backpacks that were for sale.

She shopkeeper tried hard to clean Nicole's unintentional target, but he failed miserably.

Quinn Pensky would probably have been able to invent a suitable detergent, but she was still busy doing something else.

Nicole Bristow was thus forced to pay for the dspoiled backpacks, in addition to her cue pops, and, as she had not got enough money in her pockets to pay for them, she was forced to borrow the remaining dollars from her best friend.

Zoë Brooks sighed deeply, and she requested that she was now no longer forced to do Nicole's homeworks and her laundry for the remaining months of the academic year.

The ditzy bimbo wench from Kansas looked aghast, but she was forced to confirm the deal forced upon her by Zoey. In any case, she hated this official Pacific Coast Academy backpack, whether it was clean or stained beyond repair, and she left it to her best friend.

* * *

**8:3 Banapples**

* * *

**8:3:1 Fruit Design**

As aforementioned, Blix Soft Drinks was one of the greatest sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy, and they were selling a lot of their products to thirsty students on the campus. As we will see later down the road, the stingray kids were some sort of a test market for this company who was always ready to extend its assortment of softment by adding new and improved flavours. As all known natural tastes were already taken up, they felt themselves compelled into inventing new tastes.

For that reason, Quinn Pensky, who was already known as an aspiring expert for botanic engineering, was hired by Blix for inventing new fruits, and thus also new flavours to offer to the kidss in America. Or, rather, her research was sponsored by the queen of soft drink vendors. She was not talking openly about her research, and she was not willing to reveil her real motivations for the project. She was forced by Blix to keep it as a trade secret. Instead, she lied to her friends that she was just doing so for her own enjoyment.

For example, her current gial was the genetic manipulation of banana shrubs with genes from apple plants, creating a new fruit: **Banapples**.[8:2] Thus she made her fellow students believe that apples and bananas were her favourite fruits, and that she just wanted to be able to enjoy them together.

Bananas do not grow on trees — as commonly yet wrongly assumed — but on fairly large herbs. The seeds of cultivated bananas are crippled severely, turning them parthenocarpic. Cultivation is thus necessarily based on asexual; reproduction techniques such as planting offshoots. This makes a natural selection in the sense of Darwin not possible. For that reason, new generations of banana plans propagate necessarily the genetic defects of their ancestors. There would be no natural development towards a better banana, e,g, one more resistent to pests and malicious herbs threatening their cultivation. On the long ruyn, this would be fatal for the very existence of the cultivated species of bananas.[8:3]

Quinn Pensky was one of the few people around the world working towards a solution of this sort of problems. Her means involved genetic engineering, and she wanted to win the Californian science fair with it. She was secure in the knowledge of facing some stern competition, as she had already heard about some promising future scientists at Californian middle and high schools.

Given the internationakl significance of the banana plant, the results of Quinn's research would be largely coveted here and there, and this justified once more all measures required by Blix in order to keep the related experiments and calculations a most sternly guarded secret.

Apples are known as one of the most resistent and adaptable cultivated fruit plants.

Quinn's plan was that of using the apple's genes that are responsible for these qualities and infuse bananas with them, hoping that they would assume the same properties to some extent. She knew that she had to protect her fragile plantation. She was going to publish the main stations of the progress of her banapple plant to her SplashFace account, but she would of course not mention the true purpose of her research.

* * *

**8:3:2 The School Garden**

We have already talked about some of the school teams, and now you will encounter one more:

Pacific Coast Academy had also got a gardening club, whose goal was obviously that of maintaining the school garden.

This place was very important for Quinn's project, as she obviously needed a place in order to put her genetically manipulated banana shrub, and this case was better outdoors — at least ffor the time being.

There had already been plans for some sort of greenhouse in order to intensify the development of gfreen plants on the campus.

Needless to say, this project required quite some technological expertise, and the best person for thsi task was of course Quinn Pensky. No other student was exorbitantly knowledgeable in all those subjects: botanis, chemistry, and engineering.

Quinn also though about a way to get her pets officially acknowledged as necessary for the projects, as they produced several loads of natural fertilisers. But she was also comfortable with the development of new artificial fertilisers, although she needed to be careful with these. But she had already got great ideas for developing new ones of that sort, and she needed the financial support of Blix for getting it started.

For this avail, Quinn needed to hurry up her research of the banapple bush even more than ever.

There was still no decent responsible adult for the school garden, thpough.

* * *

**8:4 Got Lemons? Make Lemonade!**

* * *

**8:4:1 Sad Nicole**

Nicole Brooks was still terribly out of money due to her mishaps in the campus shop, and she was thus unable to afford her usual cinema visit for several weekends to come. Her only form of entertainment seemed to have been shooting tiny pellets with a rubber tape at ballons that she had attached to the door of her dormitory room, which she was not willing to leave until then. Unfortunately, she would destroy more and more balloons by doing so, and thus she would run out of those sooner or later.

Zoë Brooks — on the other hand — had tried to turn lemons into lemonade by using her skills as a gifted fashion designer in order to turn the spoiled backpack into something less ugly.

Nicxole was now ready to ntake a look at the backpack that had be restyled by her best friend. Amd now she was consternated, because the container looked all of a sudden totally cute. Granted, she had already seen Zoey turn several pieces of nondescript textiles into wonderful and fashionable arts. But she had never seen her turn trash into a masterpiece of art.

For Zoë Brooks, this was not absolutely new, though, as she had practised this kind of art already before arriving on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

* * *

**8:4:2 Many Adorers**

Zoë Brooks showed her fashionably restyled backpack around in the lounge, and she was attracting immediately some huge amount of attention.

Most students plainly admired the style, and many of them were willing to spend quite a few bucks on them, and not just Chase Matthews, Michael barret, Nicole Bristow, or Dana Brooks.

A student that had never been seen by Zoë Brooks or her friends on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy listened very carefully. She introduced herself as some Stasie, and she pretended to be from the school journal, the **_Daily Stingray_**,[8:4] ready to write a huge report about this masterpiece of modern art. But was she saying the truth? Hell no, her real name was **Melinda Crenshaw**.[8:5]

* * *

**8:5 Drake's Enemy Number One**

* * *

**8:5:1 The Creature**

As we had seen, inspite of his still extremely young public career, Drake Parker had already got an insanely high amount of fans throughout southern California, especially fangirls.

Their number one was probably still aforementioned Wendy Gellar.

But not all girls between San Diego and greater Los Angeles were fans of that jerk.

One of the glorious exception was said Melinda Crenshaw, generally going by the name Mindy.

Only one person dared to name her habitually something different: Drake Parker abused her verbally, making her a _creature_.

But why did Mindy hate the young rock idol, and why was she now here on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, using a fake name?

* * *

**8:5:2 Melinda And Joshua**

Melinda Crenshaw had been a student at Belleview, videlicet the same school as Drake Parker and Joshua Nichols.

It was a typical uptown district school, with lots of spoiled rich kids ready to waste their money for crap, as best examplified by Drake Parker.

They had almost shared the same classes, at least most of the time.

Mindy was on the top of almost all honours rolls of this district school. She was especially a great amd most promising future scientist, dreaming of multiple Nobel Prizes. In this context, she exhibited a huge amount of parallels with Quinn Pensky — a fact to be considered in detail later down the road. Unfortunately, her extreme talent made her coveted by many less gifted but definitely not much less intelligent subjects at Belleview or elsewhere in San Diego.

Joshua Nichols, for example, was one of the kids that would definitely have loved to be on top of those honour rolls as well, and especially to win the San Diego science fairs. Alas, he had hitherto failed there as miserable as can be.

* * *

**8:5:3 San Diego Science Fairs**

In the spring of 2004, Belinda Crenshaw had won the San Diego Science Fair with a breathtaking project in the area of genetic engineering:

**_"_**  
Mindy was able to clone her puppy, allowing her to have two of them.[8:6]

Joshua Nichols, on the other hand, failed miserably in his quest. He had tried to produce a very strong yet cool-looking magnet. Well, the latter property he had achieved, but that was of barely any relevance for the judges of the science fair.

After all, it was not an art gallery, was it? Maybe Josh should have better tried to run for some sculptor's contest instead.

The jurymen of the science fair were little impressed by his magnet. Well, this was not quite true, they did acknowledge his efforts to some degree, and quite well so until … the beast attracted and sucked away something that it should definitely have left in peace:

An intracoronal replacement made of steel was removed by the power of the magnet from the mouth of one of the referees, complete with the rotting and decaying remains of his breakfast.

**_"_**

That's how eyewitnesses remembered the science fair.

Little wonder, Josh had been more consternated than ever before.

Upon this event, Melinda Crenshaw had started making fun of Joshua and his attitude whenever possible.

* * *

**8:5:4 Mindy's True Feelings**

After all, you might think that Mindy just hated Josh and wantedcto destroy him, but this was absolutely not the case. Quite the contrary: Mindy loved Josh, but in a weird sense. She had always known that at Belleview, she would have sunk into a swamp of mediocricity without the whole competition with the dork with the giant skull.

Joshua of course knew nothing of all this, and he would not have understood. He just waited over and over again for the day to beat his eternal rival and humiliate her badly, as he had felt humiliated over the course of the last years.

But things had been made worse after the wedding of **Audrey Parker** and **Walter Nichols**, which had turned Drake Parker and Joshua Nichols into step brothers. That wedding was a perverted and decadent catastrophe of the worst sort, and that in too many ways to count right here.

One of the most miserable consequences was the unholy fact that Drake Parkewr and Joshua Nichols were now hanging out together too much, and they did so in the most foul and disgusting possible manner.

Mindy underestood very well that Drake Parker had thusly got the worst possible impact on his step brother, and he would sooner or later ruin him and turn him into some dumb jerk. This way, the smart girl would end up once more syuck all alone in a swamp of worthless zombies.

Summing it up — Drake Parker was the one and only towering obstacle in the way betweem Melinda Crenshaw and Joshua Nichols, and thus he was rightfully hated to no end by the science freak girl.

* * *

**8:5:5 Linda Hayfer**

Most teachers atb Belleview had always acknowledged the intellectual superiority, barring one:

**Linda Hayfer** was one excessively poor excuse for a teacher, the worst at the whole east coast, well second to worst, as a certain **Francine Briggs**[8:7] was even more perverted and decadent. And once upon atime, she had been unfair enough to grant Melinda Cerenshaw only a B in an English test. thusly probably ruining her otherwise probable Harvard scholarship.

Drake Parker was the worst pupil in Hayfer's classes, and he had not made it any better by seducing and abusing her daughter Kelly.[8:8] Linda Hayfer had stated over and over that she hated Drake.

* * *

**8:5:6 Carnapping And Honour Council**

A few weeks earlier, Melinda Crenshaw had decided to hurt Drake Parker and Linda Hayfer in one swipe: She kidnapped the car of the evil teacher and made it strangely reappear over night in the calssroom where the same teacher was teaching her lessons.[8:9] Only a true technological genius like Mindy was up to such a deed.

As Drake had always insulted and talked back to Mrs. Hayfer, it was not a problem for Mindy to get the young rock star accused of having performed the above stupidities.

The case was deferred to some honor council of Belleview, upon which Drake Parker was defended sloppily by Joshua Nichols, while Mindy Crenshaw appeared hypocritically as Hayfer's shark.

Megan Parker had first pretended to be convinced that Drake was the culprit, she just wanted to be proud of at least one good deed performed by her otherwise worthless elder brother. And making a car disappear over night and mmaking it reappear at dawn in a closed building looked like deed worth of a genius. But of course she had to understand that Drake was way too dumb for doing so. Butr — last but not least — Megan figured that Mindy Crenshaw was the one and only person at Belleview able to carry out such an action that required a mastermind, technological talent, and appropriate devices.

This allowed Joshua Nichols to get Drake off the hook and to get Mindy punished for her deeds, instead. Nothing like that would have been possible for him without the alertness of Megan Parker — of course.

* * *

**8:5:7 Transfer To PCA**

Being expelled from Belleview, Melinda Crenshaw needed to find a new school, but the verdict of the honor council was not exactly a recommendation for an elitarian academy of the league of Pacific Coast Academy. Yet there was a bunch of reason for the San Diego mastermind to choose exactly that school. She made the ignoble rest of Belleview believe that she had been transferred to some insane asylum,[8:10] thusly wiping out her traces, at least for the time being.

This explains Melinda Crenshaw's usage of a false name: **Anastasia Romanowa**, which was the same name as one of the daughters of the last Russian Csar. Many con women had tried to fool the society by assuming this as a fake name.

Of course Mindy had been aware of Drake's recent concert on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, and she knew even more about the girls who had organised the whole spring fling, and who must have been thusly among the biggest fans of Drake: Zoë Brooks and Nicole Bristow. She was totally eager on making those two girls pay dearly from fangirling for a perversely disgusting jerk such as Drake Parker.

Alas, Melinda Crenshaw was also aware of the existence of one Quinn pensky at Pacific Coast Academy. She had hirtherto believed that she was the only girl of her generation in California able to win the state science fair during the next three years, let alone a scientific Nobel Prize withing the next decade or two.

And her faith would have been correct, at least until summer 2004, the moment in which a new female star climbed above the horizon of the Californian sky of science. Later down the road, we will explore how Mindy canme to know about Quinn, and how her attitude towards the geek girl from the north had developed. For now it suffices to say that Melinda Crenshaw saw her transfer to Pacific Coast Academy — even if only for some limited time — as a great opportunity for sabotaging the research of her worst rival — ever!

* * *

**8:6 Backpack Counterfeiter**

During the following days, Mindy Crenshaw started selling plagiiarised counterfeits of the backpack improved and upgraded. First, she had opened a booth straight on the campus, which was against the rules of the Pacific Coast Academy. She was correctly admonished by campus security for doing so.

Of course , this action did not exactly make Zoë and her friends very happy.

Nicole Bristow wanted her best friend to hire a lawyer in order to sue Anastasia, whose proper identity they were not yet aware of.

Her uncle was a shark, but one that was often enough on the wrong side of the law.[8:11] Ironically, this was so close to Melinda Crenshaw's behaviour during the aforementioned honour council.

Quinn Pensky had also got an uncle who happened to be a lawyer.[8:12]

But Zoey did not think that this was appropriate. She would have preferred to beat Mindy with her own weapons. But she needed to find a way to do so.

Mindy was now up to negotiating with the owner of the library, persuading him into selling her counterfeits of Zoë Brooks's work of supreme art.

But this deal was by absolutely no means vital to her business, because, inspite of the large size of Pacific Coast Academy, the students here were only a totally newgligeable part of the total potential market for Mindy's plagiarisms.

Indeed, she had already found a very eager revendor at James K. Polk in Santa Clarita.

His name was **Winston Hunter**,[8:13] but he was generally just known as the _Backpack Boy_ because he ran a backdoor business where he sold a variety of backpacks to other students of his school.

Within a few days, she would also find a potentioal revendor in downtown Seattle: **Rodney Goober**,[8:14] generally referred to as _Rip-Off Rodney_, was an utterly remorseless dealer and shortchanger, selling poor quality stuff to students in his school district for ungodly prices.

Mindy's only concern was the possibility of a public revelation of her actual identity and her usage of a fake name for enrolling here at Pacific Coast Academy.

This would not have happened if there had been nobody on the campus that had known her from San Diego. Alas, there were more than just a few former Belleview students at Pacific Coast Academy.

One of them was aforementioned Wendy Gellar, the cool class mate of Dustin Beooks and ardent fangirl of Drake Parker. But until a few weeks ago, she would not have talked to Zoë Brooks, because she had just seen her as an annoying wannabe number one fan of the rock idol and thus as her worst rival. Likewise, she had stiopped making fun of Dustin, she just told him that she did not like him back as he would have expected. These obstacles gone, Wendy informed her best friend Megan Parker about the situation in a long e-mail, and she also alerted Zoey, using Dustin as a messenger.

But how was Zoë Brooks going to react?

* * *

**8:7 Sabotage**

While it is true that Quinn Pensky and Melinda Crenshaw had never met before the latter's switch to Pacific Coast Academy, they had been remotely aware of each other for over a year already.

Melinda Crenshaw had — more or less randomly — stumbled upon the scientific _Splash face_ blog of Quinn Pensky about one year and a half earlier. She had been immediately interested in the Seattle nerd queen's take on **Albert Einstein**'s general theory of relativity.

But Quinn's switch to California had not been announced on the blog. It was Wayne "Fire Wire" Gilbert who had implicitly and unintentionally informed Melinda about the new geek girl at Pacific Coast Academy. This had happened upon the previous state science fair, where Wayne and his friends had represented Los Angeles County.

Likewise, Quinn had only accidentally been made aware of Melinda Crenshaw, but this had been much less of a shock for her, because Quinn had supposed that there were quite a few smart girls in California, as opposed to Seattle where she had always felt unique. Nevertheless, Quinn was still convinced of her superiority, and she had got the ambitions of demonstrating this during the next two years, although she was not an official member of the science club of Pacific Coast Academy— for aforementioned reasons.

So, what were Melinda Crenshaw's plans for wreaking havoc like? Well, the smartest women — ever — from San Diego simply misled Quinn into believing that the genetically manipulated tree was bearing any fruit. But — indeed — she built fake fruits from a variety of weird ingredients and attach them to the shrub. She renewed the fruits every night, feigning thusly a certain maturing process of the fruits.

Quinn checked the maturity status of what she falseley believed to be banapples every afternoon, and she published the result to her blog. Once upon a time, she noticed some smashed fruits on the ground. But she did not notice that those banapples had beenleft there accidentally by Mindy Crenshaw during the last nightly intervention. Rather, she made sparrows and ravens responsible for this catastrophe, and thus she erected a scarecrow in her own likeness, firing deadly laser beams from its crystal eyes when spotting a flying enemy approaching the banapples. She was not aware that the fruits were strongly faked.

* * *

**8:8 Mindy's And Zoey's Reconciliation**

* * *

**8:8:1 Megan's Next Intervention**

So, Megan Parker had heard about Mindy's presence on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, and she had applied successfully for a pass in order to skip classes on some Friday, allowing her to wreak havoc one the hallowed ground of the stingrays for almost a whole weekend.

Arranged by Wendy Gellar, Megan Parker and Zoë Brooks met at Sushi Rox in order to strike against the plagiariser and saboteur.

There was also another reason for Megan to show up on the campus. The elementary school girl from San Diego was a gifted oboe player of uttermost virtuosity, but she did not only use her woodwindf instrument in order to entertain humans. As an aspiring priestess of Orpheus, a legendary ancient Greek hero, she used her music in order to enchant the souls of humans and animals in a manipulative manner, almost like hypnosis, but a lot more subtle. While she was not really able to talk to humans with the sound of her oboe in the sense in which humans communicate using their language, Drake's little sister was really successful in manipulating the wild beasts this way.[8:15]

As aforementioned, there were a lot of fairly small yet fear inspiring beasts on the campus, such as racoons, killer squirrels, and some dog named Elvis. Guys like Dustin Brooks and Chase Matthews were afraid of some of those kinds of beasts.

Elvis was still hidden by Zoë Brooks and her friends from the staff and the the school administration. He had often enough been close to being discovered, for a variety of reasons, but the kids had always managed keeping him away from the eyes of the intruders. For that avail, it had been necessary to pass Elvis around from dormitory room to dormitory room, whenever the respective advisers started turning suspicious.

And a few weeks ago, it had been Dustin's turn to take care of the bellowing fury. This had almost ended in a plain catastrophe. doey'slittle brother had not been able to face the evil dog without heavy armour. Megan was now willing to help Dustin, first by calming down Elvis in Dustin's vicinity, and then by teaching the little bugger to help himself, amking him lose his dangerously annoying problems with the dog.

Zoë Brooks was extremely glad that Megan was such a huge help here. Otherwise she would have been forced to find a new home for Elvis somewhere far away from the campus, as she was unable to submit Dustin to more torture of that sort.

* * *

**8:8:2 Caught At Night**

Megan and Wendy had observed Mindy all over the campus,a nd they finally caught her while manipulating once more the banana shrub by replacing the fruits again.

Mindy looked consternated when the electric torch lights went on.

At the same time, Wendy had sent a message via mobile phone to Zoë Brooks and Quinn Pensky, telling them to show up right here in the botanic garden of the school in order to see what was going on.

Mindy tried to talk her way out of the situation even before the arrival of Quinn and Zoey, but she knew that she would not stand a dim chance against cunning vixen Megan Parker.

Finally, the reinforcement called by Wendy Gellar arrived on site, forcing Melinda Crenshaw to fess up immediately.

Mindy admitted to hating Zoey because the latter was a dangerous groupie of the disgusting jerk Drake Parker.

Megan Parker glared at Mindy. "Zoë Brooks is not a groupie, she is just someone who likes his songs."

Zoey nodded solemnly.

**_"_**  
See, I am by no means happy about most of Drake's qualities.

He really treats girls like toys.

But this has nothing to do with listening to his songs when possible.

**_"_**

* * *

**8:8:3 The Compromise**

Of course it would now have been easy for Quinn Pensky and Zoë Brooks to denounce the con girl and plagiariser. But they did not really want to do so, at least no longer.

Mindy finally understood that she had misjudged Zoey, and she was ready to pay her royalties for the plagiarised backpacks.

This allowed Zoey to buy a new yuke box for the girls' lounge, playing not only music by Drake Parker, but whatever they were able to get.

Quinn Pensky was thoroughly embarrassed by the fact that she had not been able to identify the banapple fruits as utter fakes. She had now understood that she had gone a wrong way in her research, and she needed to justify this in the face of those who were financing her efforts, videlicet Blix' department for research and development.

As a great con artist, Melinda Crenshaw would certainly find an excuse with ease, and then they would work together on the problem and thus speed up everything considerably.

By the way, Megan Parker had been totally successful in dissuading Elvis from being perversely mean to Dustin. But she needed to work more in order to get Zoey's little brother to be no longer afraid of animals of that size, such as toads.

Unfortunately, Quinn Pensky was still not aware how much they were just abused by the soft drink company.

And the other girls were just looking forward to new juice flavours.

But would they all wake up in time, before it was too late?

It was such a pity that Nicole Bristow, the daughter of a juice producer, was the dumbest of all the girls and still utterly unable to understand that Blix's almighty and most selfish commercial interests were the main reason behind the cultivation of the banapple plant.

In any case, Melinda Crenshaw would not have to leave Pacific Coast Academy that soon again, forced to return to Belleview. This way, she was also more likely to get over Joshua Nichols, the reason for all her malevolent escapades that had culminated in the hitherto vilest of her deeds, videlicet plagiarising the backpack design by Zoë Brooks. For at Pacific Coast Academy, Mindy would encounter enough exciting challenges to keep her from doing nonsense. Granted, the girls were still excluded from the scientific laboratories of Wayne Gilbert's club, but together thue would fight their way into it as soon as possible, notwithstanding any obstacle.

* * *

**Chapter 9 Career Week**

* * *

**9:1 Basketball Team**

* * *

**9:1:1 Team Morals**

At the beginning of the year, Zoey's decision to challenge the boys of the basketball team had caused a lot of insane turmoil, shaking the whole school down to its foundations.

Nevertheless, the following months had strengthened the team spirit of the athletic representants of Pacific Coast Academy to some significant degree, with eclatant consequences for the performance of the basketball team.

Logan was still a disgusting jerk, but he was no longer a threat for the team's efforts as a whole.

For Zoey, the situation was nowhere near as easy as she had imagined. She was somewhat the star of the current team, but she had started understanding her visions in which my ghost had been involved. But she wanted to organise a pep rallye before the impending state finals in order to be able to squeeze the very best out of the team.

* * *

**9:1:2 Outfits For Atheletes And Cheerleaders**

Her talents for designing fashion had turned her immediately predestined for designing the outfits for the basketball team, but she was prevented from doing so by the school's administration.

There was one restriction that was beyond negotiation: The logos of the main sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy would have to dominate the whole outfit.

This way, Zoey had started to understand that _the system_ not only comprised Mr. Bradford and the school administration. but especially the almighty sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy. But she deemed it a necessary restriction:

**_"_**  
Those enterprises just try to earn their money, and they care for the education of the youth.

So, if we are required to represent their logos in turn, it is not necessarily unfair.  
**_"_**

But the sting of the sponsor's restrictive interference was now sitting deep in Zoey's unconscious, fixed with barbed hooks.

With the passage of time, it would turn obvious that Zoey Brooks would henceforth secondguess the motivations and the nature of the sponsors more and more, for she was a person with morals, unlike most of the other students at Pacific Coast Academy.

The same restrictions were also valid for the costumes of the cheerio squad, including head chearleader Dana Cruz.

And there was even more of a problem concerning the cheerio uniforms than with the jersey of the basketball team:

Zoey deemed it outright sexist, and she had tried hard to persuade the cheerleaders into objecting to it.

Alas, Dana Cruz was upset by Zoey's intervention. She wanted to use her cheerio performances as a launching pad for a career as a supermodel, and the current design rules sold well. Dana wanted to sell herself best, no matter what means it took.

Needless top say, Nicole Bristow deemed the cheerio outfits very cute, but she feared that the cheerios were now about to claim all the cute boys for themselves, leaving none for the rest of the girls at Pacific Coast Academy.

For Zoey Brooks, this was a most frustrating experience, for inspite of having so many friends at Pacific Coast Academy, she started to feel all alone. Would she ever find any living soul to talk about that angsty dilemma?

* * *

**9:1:3 Choreography**

Of course, the outfit was not everything for the cheerleading team, but at most the cream topping of the cake.

After the reforms of the drama club, Fletcher St. Troy had got more time to spend on preparing the choreography of the cheerio performance.

But nothing worked without music, and the favourite songs of the cheerio squad were — at least since spring fling — those by Drake Parker, and this included both his most popular songs like _Highway To Nowhere_ which he had not been allowed to perform and those he had performed for the first time on the campus.

Life music was rather an exception for cheerleading practice, anyways.

But as Drake had promised Zoey to show up more frequently in turn for the formidable tanktop design, there was some chance left that he would at least come to the rescue of the stingray cheerios at one big event, preferrably the state finals.

* * *

**9:1:4 The Opponents**

The greater area of Los Angeles had always been an accumulation points not only for movie stars, but also for impressive athletes.

For that reason, the competition for our middle school basketball team was very strong and numerous: **Silver Spring** and **Brewster High** had won the last three Californian championships.

But the most powerful opponent of all was the team of aforementioned James K. Polk middle school in Santa Clarita.

Their most dangerous player was a tall blond rake named Seth Powers, a guy who probably slept with a basketball in his arms. When he walked the streets, he used to gyrate one of those balls on one his index fingers, and he was a hell of dextrous. It was not necessarily his intention, but with this trick he intimidated almost all of his opponents already before the start of a basketball match.

The captain of their team was one **Mike Grudzelanek**, [9:1] a rude bully, jock, and jerk, similar to Logan Reese, but maybe sometimes worse.

But there was an even worse and more cruel bully at their school and in their athletic teams, a certain **William Loomer**, the epitome of _jerk_, _jock_, and _bully_. He was the leader of an evil bully gang, comprising two henchmen that will occupy us later on: **Buzz Rodriguez** and **Jerome Crony**.[9:2] In any case, Loomer was the star of the bully trio, the others were his mindless henchmen.

The most reasonable person in the team of the **Wolves** — the mascot of James K. Polk — was one **Jennifer Mosely**, a name generally corrupted to _Moze_ by her falsely so-called friends **Edmond Bigby** and **Simon Nelson Cook**.

* * *

**9:1:5 Faking Potato Crisps**

Unfortunately, there was a huge problem for the team of Pacific Coast Academy: He was addicted to fat potato crisps, and thus he was about to turn podgy. This meant certainly nothing good gfor his abilities as a basketball player.

You might think that this was a problem similar to that of Drake Parker, but this was absolutely not the case. In other words: The therapy developed by Quinn Pensky for the rock idol would not have worked at all for Michael Barret.

Once more, Quinn Pensky was willing to take care of someone's terrible disease. But she did not yet see away to cure the causes, and thus her only chance to do something about it was to invent some fake snacks looking and tasting more or less exactly liked potato crisps, but without the fat and the carbohydrates. After the state finals, she would start to treat the reasons for Michael's symptoms.

The creation of the new pseudo-snack required a huge variety of ingredients that were not easy to find, and definitely not available freely in the campus shop, such as plutonium,[9:3]_a radioactive substance used in nuclear power plants and some medical laboratories_.

Only Quinn's external connections would allow her to acquire the respective materials. And this time, it was clearly a job for Cal Meacham from Caltech in Pasadena.

Fortunately, Melinda Crenshaw was now also here by Quinn Pensky's side, and she would be able to support and accelerate her research. And she had already seen a potential problem: The formular envisioned by Quinn and Cal contained a substance that, when combined with Michael's blood type, lead to an interruption of parts of the peripheral nervous system, disabling him most likely temporarily from walking or throwing balls, which, of course, would have been the worst to happen to an athlete during a match.

Quinn pensky sighed, as she should have seen those problems coming. The whole purpose of the project was one to deveive NMichael's taste nerves, so messing with the peripheral nervous system was absolutely inevitable. She was forced to control and funnel the effect on the nervous system, and to do that exactly in the right way, or else similar problems happened.

Mindy suggested that an injection of a countermedic would relieve Michael's symptoms on site, even during the match.

But here, Quinn had to object, because the usage of syringes was not allowed for athletes in training or in a competition. "Michael would have to be disqualified."

The research simply had to continue, with so little time left.

* * *

**9:2 Job Project**

* * *

**9:2:1 Bender's Announce**

Zoë Brooks was sitting next to Chase Matthews in her homeroom classes, taught by Mr. Bender. Like the other members of the basketball squad, they were nervously looking forward to the upcoming championships.

The teacher was distributing the mensual forms for judging the cafeteria services. But then he had to switch to some different topic:

**_"_**  
Each year, the eighth grades at our school are submitted to a career week.

At the beginning, there will be some assessments concerning your expectations and skills.

Then you are assigned an internship for a few days, about which you will have to report.  
**_"_**

The pupils moaned, as this looked like a lot of work.

There had not been anything like that in our times, because the board had thought that we elitarian kids would make our career simply because of the connections of our families and the school's board. But times had changed after the war of Vietnam.

The organisation of a career week had been a lot simpler before the times of coeducation, but now it was necessary to fight off the usual prejudices against girls in traditional boys' jobs, and vice versa. Unfortunately, Leo Bradford had never been interested in doing anything against that kind of bias.

David Bender introduced **Shirley Splitz**,[9:4] the leading guidance councelour of the county of Los Angeles. She had been assigned as the pupervisor of the career week project here at Pacific Coast Academy.

Splitz started talking almost like a sergeant of a marine boot camp. This way, she intimidated a whole lot of students even more, especially poorly performing ones such as Nicole Bristow. Them she explained the programme of the following weeks in detail. The whole event also served for the preparation of the individual high school schedules for the students — or so it was said.

* * *

**9:2:2 Assessments**

The kids had to fill in some questionary about the expectations of their career, and about some general educational skills.

Logan Reese was the fastest in filling it in. He wanted to become either a top model or a star athlete, where he had to stay rich with as few efforts as possibly. He also insisted in working most of the time at a sunny beach. His special skills were his extremely good looks and his muscles.

Dana Cruz's answers were similar, but she stressed the necessity of working out, because she was not as allergic to havin g to work hard for your career as Logan.

Nicole Bristow was looking for a job where she had to do with lots of cute boys. Unfortunately, she did not find any such optio in the multiple choice menu, and thus she just inserted this into some text box for additional remarks. Otherwise, she was not able to say something about her skills. But she had to indicate digestive problems, more precisely she often lost her last meal when walking too much. Fortunately, she had now got her scooter, but it was still a problem during gym classes.[9:5]

Zoë Brooks proofread Nicole's questionary, and she was a bit dosappointed. "That won't help a bit for finding a suitable career for you."

Nicole moaned for despair. "Why is working with cute boys not a career path requiring special skills?"

Zoey growled: "Because you just scre the guys away with your attitude."

Nicole sighed desperately.

Then Zoey reminded her best friend of the recent talent show, where they had worked together as a team styling other kids. "You would certainly be a great hair dresser.

Nicole sighed, because she was not willing to razor the already bald head of old disgusting farters like Leo Bradford. But she accepted her best friend's advice, anyways. Buit she knew that most barbers were at least as talkative as she was, regardless of the kind of customers they had.

Chase Matthews was certainly a gifted playwright, and so he stressed his creative writing prowess. But he was also convinced of his weird grimaces as a special skill. His phobia concerning racoons was now about to wane — thanks to Megan Parker. But he was worried whether his bushy hair would influence his future chances, and to what extent.

Michael was not sure whether to mention his ability to play the transversally held flute as a special skill. But he was convinced of his abilities as a basketball player. But was his addiction to fat and spicy snacks a medical condition of which he better made no well-kept secret?

For Quinn there was hardly any doubt. The nerd was going straight foward towards a scientiofic academic career, such as for the NASA and similar supreme scientific institutions.

Zoey had simply god too many decent skills, and she feared that this would not be really helpful, either. And she knew that her real passion, videlicet fashion design and creation, would disappoint her parents. But she kept on filling in her questionary in a honest way. Now she could only hope for something good to come out of it.

* * *

**9:2:3 Internships**

* * *

**9:2:3:1 Nicole's Coffe Cart**

Shirley Splitz had assigned Nicole a one week job at the coffee cart.

Her boss for that was **Calvin Wang**,[9:6], a recent graduate at Pacific Coast Academy who tried to eaern some bucks for college by running this cart.

The supplies for this ambulant booth were usually from various sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy, such as Blix or Schneider's Bakery.

But you have already imagined this, haven't you?

The kids were used more or less as cheap auxiliary workers for the proxy vendors of various sponsors.

Calvin was one of the typical cute jerks, similar to Logan Reese, but even a bit worse and of course a few years older. This distracted Nicole a lot.

Nicole was very outgoing and good in addressing customers, which was probably the reason why she had been sent to the coffee cart. And she had already got bexperiences in this area, because she had worked last some as an auxiliary waitress in a pub in her hometown which was run or sponsored by Bristow Juices. But the downside was that she was not really paying attention to the wishes of the clients.

Especially Ashley Blake had to complain a lot about Nicole's working morals. "I wanted a javaccino with soy latte, not with fudge!" OK, Ashley was sometimes picky and obnoxious, but she meant business, and she weas allergic to quite a few things.

**Javaccino** was the most popular sort of coffee sold at Pacific Coast Academy, and marketed exclusively by Schneider's Bakery.

Ashley was upset, and she called her big brother for reinforcement.

Bully Vincent Blake was ready to punch Nicole's lights out, not only because the ditzy wench had served his sister in a miserable way, but also because the bimbo squealed all the time how cute Vince was.

Fortunately, Calvin struck a compromise by simply returning Ashley's money.

But it was clear that the coffee cart was bound to go belly up within a few weeks with Nicole Bristow in charge.

* * *

**9:2:3:2 Dana's Trash Yard**

From Dana Cruz's profile, Shirley Splitz was immediately able to deduct that Dana Cruz had git a great potential for aggressivity and for bad temper.

It was thus absolutely necessary to send the bully Latina to some place where she could not cause too much unwanted destruction.

And there was only one place anywhear near the campus of Pacific Coast Academy where Dana's temper was even somehat productive:

I have already talked about Joseph Brexly, the friend of Chase, who ran that junk yard half a way down the road from the entrance to the campus.

Day after day, old cars that had been damaged beyond repair in accidents were put to a rest on the trash place.

Dana's job was now precisely that of beating them into pieces, so Joe the mechanic would gather the single constituents and be able to reuse them as substitutes for cars that were still repairable.

The remaining smithereens were collected and forwarded to some steel factory in Bakersfield, about two or three hours away from Pacific Coast Academy. There they would be used in orger to produce new devices made of steel and brass. The steel work was run by a minor sponsor of Pacific Coast Academy only, but this did not mean that Dana's job was less important for the school.

Unfortunately, Dana was a bit too brash, and she tended to destroy bits and pieces that would still have been reusable.

But Brexly did not really mind that, because he was still able to get some bucks for the last junk. He was not even able to control Dana, because he was a bit din-witted, similar to aforementioned dormitory adviser Coco Wexler.

Unfortunately, Dana accidentally also trashed the still functional car of a customer that was just here at the junk yard in order to look for some junk for a sculpture.

His name was **Spencer Shay**, and his car was a typical designer vehicle composed of pieces of trash painted in obnoxious colours. In other words, he had it really coming. And after all, he was looking for trash to make a sculpture from, so there he was: He could take the decaying remains of his old car and turn them into a fanciful monument, something that would not be too much of a problem for him, would it? He just needed to find a way to return to his hometown, which happened to be Seattle.

But that was not Dana's business, was it?

Alas, it should have been Joe Brexly's business to inform his intern about the strict rules for the separation of containers of potentially toxic substances such as most used batteries from normal junk. Those dangerous constituents had to be treated separately by qualified experts somewhere else.

Joe the mechanic was willing to try to repair Spencer's scooter. But failing this, the weirdo from Seattle would just have to buy a new one. And Joe recommended the new Jet-X from Qualitech, videlicet the same brand as the one used by Dana and her friends. By the way, the sciooters by Qualitech were usually produced by recycling wrecked vehicles from Joe Brexly's well assorted trash yard.

In addition, Dana Cruz should have worked with proper outfit, especially gloves resistant to fire, acid, and poison. Of course she was not vulnerable to those things, but there was that rule, anyways.

So Brexly better kept his mouth shut, and he just attested that the bully Latina had been one of the best interns he could have ever wished for.

* * *

**9:2:3:3 Quinn's Pear Store**

Quinn Pensky knew a lot about computers and electronics, so it was little wonder that she was employed as an intern at a nearby store run by Pear Electronics.

This happened to be the shop that provided all students of Pacific Coast Academy with a new laptop, and which was also maintaining the local network and the interweb connection of the illustrious boarding school.

Quinn Pensky was well aware of the significance of the contracts the boarding school had with the biggest and most modern vendor of software and hardware in the greater Los Angeles area. Thus she had been totally looking forward to her one week internship as a member of the local service staff. Since her first day on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, she had started making plans for an upgrade and improvement of the school's technology.

But before being sent out in order to provide service for the customers, Quinn was submitted to some short training in customer care practice. She had been addressed by the trainers as a genius, and she felt totally flattered for that.

Quinn's coach for customers' care was one Natalie Schorr,[9:7] whom Quinn had already seen before right in Seattle. More precisely, she was also the boss of Seattle's Pear Shops.

During the training, Natalie taught Quinn a whole host of customer manipulation strategies.[9:8]

Among other things, Quinn was prohibited from acknowledging the existence of serious problems, while feigning to understand why the customers would think that there were any. "But upon a closer look, this is just an additional feature …"

Quinn should have seen that this was nothing but corrupt manipulation of the clients. In addition, she had hoped to work in the department for research and development instead of just customer care. Her main interest would have been in the creation of apps for the **Pear Phone**, a new mobile telecommunication device many teenagers of the day coveted to absolutely no end. But an occupation in the departmnent of research and development was impossible in the frame of a very short internship. But she still hoped to be eligible for such a task in the frame of a paid internship later on, and thus she refrained at least for now from complaining. But Quinn had started pondering about the statements made already a few times by Zoë Brooks secondguessing the motivations of Pear and other main sponsors.

Was that just a start, or would she turn even more suspicious later on?

* * *

**9:2:3:4 Zoey's Administration Office**

As aforementioned, Zoë Brooks was definitely qualified for a huge range of internships all over the area.

Given the fact that the blond Mary Sue from Louisiana had often enough been kind of a spokesman, or rather spokesgirl, of many other fellow students, and that she had thusly made a lort of experiences with the staff of the school administration, Shirley Splitz had decided to flip the coin and make Zoey work for one week as an auxiliary clerk in the administration building of Pacific Coast Academy.

This way, Zoey's elaborate theories and concepts concerning the possibilities of a fair and efficient organisation of the whole boarding school business would be supplemented by some practical experience.

Beverly Brown loaded Zoey Brooks with some dozen of folders. "Dean Rivers had to go on a business trip … somewhere! He left us with some important issues concerning the time tables for the elementary school classes of the next year."

Zoey gasped. "Time tables?" She sighed deeply, but the fact that she was somewhat responsible for creating the time table for her little brother was somewhat motivating.

The folders contained a list of teachers, along with their respective subjects and the amount of hours of availability, and another folder specified the amount of pupils in each grade, along with their respective subjects.

Of course Zoë Brooks was not exactly the main responsible, as Dean Rivers would still have to proofread and sign the ready time tables upon his return.

Fortunately, Garth Berman was around, and he instructed Zoey in the deeper secrets of time table planning. He remembered when he had been assigned that job, back as a high school junior. "I wanted to impress the colleges with this … kind of." He shrugged. "Mind you, making time tables for middle school and high school is infinitely more demanding, because of all the AP classes and electives.

Of course, back in my time, there had been time tables as well, but they were a lot more straightforward. There were hardly any electives at all, and all students got the same demanding education.

Zoey wondered where Dean Rivers had really gone to, and why it had happened all of a sudden. She sensed that there had been something fishy, but she deemed it wrong to even try to spy on the headmaster. Well, from the loose sheets floating all over the office, she took the hints that he was in secret negotiations with various sponsors of the school. "But why does the dean even try to keep it secret from the board and Garth Berman?" She sighed deeply. In any case, she had gained quite some insights in the process of the administration of an institution in the likeness of this elitarian boarding school. She was even exercising some influence on pending decisions of the school administration, as will be seen down below.

* * *

**9:2:3:5 Chase's And Michael's Sushi Factory**

As aforementioned, Chase Matthews had already worked as a delivery boy for Kazu, the owner of the local sushi bar.

Michael would have loved to join in, at least for one week as an intern. Like Chase, he expected that interns were eligible for an employee's discount, thusly getting sushi for a lower price than usual.

The two of them had begged in the office of Shirley Splitz for working at Kazu's. They confirmed that they were extremely knowledgeable and experienced in the science of dealing with all sorts of fish: Tuna, salmon, stockfish, red herring, and so on and so forth.

Unfortunately, Kazu did not need an employee righjt away, so he forwarded Chase and Michael to the nearest sushi factory run by aforementioned Pacific Sushi, the real enterprise behind most sushi bars in California.

The two unfortunate guys were now told to stand at sopme huge conveyor belt and to package portions of sushi[9:9] that were to be delived to Kazu's and many other little sushi bars all over the county of Los Angeles and the adjacent regions.

Needless to say, the longer the work lasted, the more disgusted became Chase and Michael by the smell and the looks of all the dead fish and other icky stuff. In addition, they performed their work just crappily. The worst task they had to perform was that of cutting cuttlefish.[9:10]

But the hygienic standards at this factory were way below the legal styandards valid in the state of California. They did not wear proper gloves, and they were not unlikely to sneeze into the packages or the fish.

Some of the fish were of an endangered species, but Chase or Michael did not know anything at all about marine biology.

After the week as workers in the sushi factory, they decided to refrain from eating sushi. Unfortunately, their good resolutions would not survive the summer break.

* * *

**9:2:4 Reports**

Everyone but Logan Reese had turned in his report about the week as an intern.

The junior jerk of Beverly Hills just rendered a medical attestation saying that he had contorted his liver, turning him unable to do anything but eat, sleep, drink, and go to the cinema for a whole week.

Nicole Bristow's report consisted of statements about hwer cute boss and about all the cute male customers on the campus. She also emphasised that everyone on the campus was thirsty, including even Dana Cruz.

The bully Latina's report emphasised how heavy the blocks of steel and brass were which she had to lift and to split into smithereens, and how she had achieved this with her bare hands.

Quinn wrote a long dissertations about the possibilities of improving mobile telecommunication technology severely, and how she would have to reform Pear Electronics in order to achieve this noble goal.

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret were not able to show up when Miss Splitz had to deal with the reports, as they had been vomiting for one whole week straight after having worked in the sushi factory. These were really bad news, because the state finals of the basketball team were so close, and they would be needed by the team of coach Ferguson.

Zoë Brooks, however, wrote that she had now understood why administrating such a complicated establishment like an elitarian boarding school of our size was a harder business than most students were able to see. "This is because most of the time, the staff of the adminsitration does a really great job, making it seem so easy for the students and the low level staff members, such as dormitory advisers." But she did not refrain from critisising a few things, and she also told the others about alternative plans. On the other hand, she did not write about her reasons for turning suspicious of the motivations of some of the members of the administration, as well as of the board of sponsors.

* * *

**9:3 Last Pep Rallye**

While Pep Rallies had got a long tradition at Pacific Coast Academy, those had hitherto been restricted to the important games of the football team. All the other high school teams, and those of the middle and elementary school sections, were but completely ignored, except if immediate circumstances appeared to make them a useful part of the sponsors' marketing strategies.

But this year, there was also such an event in order to support the middle school basket ball team. Indeed, Zoë had made this possible during her week as an intern in the administration office.

The whole event was opened by a long speech given by Dean Carl Rivers in freont of all stoodents. As most sermons by principals, both back in my times and at today's schools, his way of talking was totally annoying and boring, making half of the pupils drop asleep.

Then the cheerleaders came along, lead by no other than Dana Cruz and followed by Tara Ganz Nad Haley Ferguson. They were totally dumb and arrogant, yet this was just business as usual. The cheerleaders hired from naighbouring schools were of copurse not present in the pep rally, as they had got classes to attend at their own school, which was one of the major drawbacks of those hirelings.

The fact that the Stingray cheerio squad had been sometimes coached by Joy Durka regularly a teacher at one of the worst enemies at the impending state championships, was of course a huge problem.

Coach Ferguson rallied his team for one additional time in order to give strategical instructions for the match.

The members of the stingray team were supposed to say whether they had understood those commands, and all of them answered, barring Michael Barret who was apparently unable to speak.

Quinn pensky shuddered, as she knew very well the reasons for the pronblem:

Her fake potato chips, whose tasks had still been that of deceiving the nerves in Michael Barret's tongue, had in fact paralysed the same. This was absolutely no fun at all.

Clearly, the tongue was not the most important tool of a basketball player, but not being able to communiate at all by means of talking was no fun.

And — as aforementioned — it was illegal to inject a countermedic via syringe, due to those stern anti doping laws. Using a pill or something like that would have been too slow, as figured by Melinda Crenshaw and Cal meacham who had calculated the whole thing.

Things became worse when it turned out that not only Michael had eaten the false snacks, but also coach Ferguson. This meant that he would not be able to instruct the players.

Fortunately, Zoey Brooks had got a great idea. She suggested to deploy some kind of sign language in order to overcome the lack of oral communication.

* * *

**9:4 Sweet Victory**

The umpire was a certain **Coach Peirson** from aforementioned Rocky Road middle school over at the east coast.

The opponent in the final match was no other than the team of James K. Polk.

During the first half of the match, most things went well for the Wolves, because their experienced cheerio girls were a whole lot louder than Dana Cruz and her friends, and they worked as one unit.

These squealing cheerleaders were Mercedes Griffin[9:11] alias **Missy Meany** and Candy Manderson.[9:12]

The reason was the fact that our team was communicating via a secret sign code developed by Quinn Pensky, who had recently studied cryptography and randomised steganography for the purpose of creating secure data transfer strategies for the new Pear Phone.

And finally, the stingray cheerios did not have to rely on record music:

Right in time for the second half of the match, Drake Parker showed up with his guitar in order to power the cheerios' performance. Drake had been a mediocre basketball player at middle school, but he was now too lazy for that. Anyways, he was about to perform some excruciationgly inspirational song for our cheerleaders taht made it impossible for Dana to fail in whippin g the basketball team.

The song was appropriatly named _Sweet Victory_,[9:13] with lyrics by Adelaide Singer and with a tune by Wendy Gellar.

Drake was not really performing solo, but he was backed up by his sister Megan and the marvellous sound of her oboe.

With the final blow, the stingrays secured a sweet victory, for the first time in the history of the school. This triumphal result was valued little, when compared to a hypothetical victory in high school sports, especially the football team. But for the sponsors, it had already justified the step towards coeducation, and they would be more generous during the next years.

Dean Rivers decided to give all pupils a day off school.

Unfortunately, the impending celebration would involve a lot of drinks and snacks, such as those fake potato crisps created by Quinn Pensky. This way, many teachers and kids would lose their voice for a few hours.

But who cared after some sweet, sweet, sweet victory?

* * *

**Chapter 10 Middle School Ball**

* * *

**10:1 Dances At PCA**

The middle school segment of Pacific Coast Academy used to organise an annual ball for its students — an event even going back to my times.

Of course you will ask whether such an event made sense at a school reserved for male students.

But the solution was basically the same as for cheerleading or other events that required girls:

Pacific Coast Academy had contacts with many of the neighbouring schools of this county, such as Hollywood School For The Professional Performance Arts, James K. Polk, Northridge, et alii, and the latter used to send some girls over to us in order to make up for our shortcomings.

Now there were female students, but they were still clearly outnumbered, and thus it was about as necessary to hire reinforcements from elsewhere as it had been all those years ago.

During the first decades of the school's existence, the girls were randomly drawn in some sort of tombola. This procedure was extremely unpopular among us students, and I always skipped the ball because I did not want to meet some spoiled brat, just because the random draw forced me to. I had needed some medical certificate in order to get a pass for skipping it, and many others had done the same, until finally this random draw got abolished for good.

So how were ball partners to be determined nowadays?

* * *

**10:2 Computer's Choice**

* * *

**10:2:1 The Announce**

Mr. Bender was teaching his kids about something extremely interesting:

How do enterprises use population statistics in order to make their marketing strategies more efficient?

Zoey sighed deeply, because she had to think about the marketing strategies of the sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy. And she was absolutely right in doing so. She had finally — after almost one academic year at Pacific Coast Academy — undersstood what this school was really: No more than a marketing and public relations department, or even a money laundry, for its sponsors. After my revelation, she had started understanding this step by step, and she was really consternated by this fact.

Mr. Bender had already been a teacher here at Pacific Coast Academy for several years, and he was an alumnus. This implies that he was — or at least should have been — familiar with the situation himself. But he ignored it naïvely, and only for this reason had he been able to cooperate willingly with people like Jake Savage.

Anyways, the classes went not by undisturbed.

Suddenly, two people sent by the school administration stood right in the door frame: **Todd Smith**[10:1] and Debora Strack[10:2] were responsibles for the organisation of the upcoming school ball.

Todd was a senior of Pacific Coast Academy high school, and he had been put in charge by Dean Carl Rivers.

Basically, the current heradmaster was not really a fan of parties, but he knew that he could not oppress them without any good reason, or else Garth Berman would have caused him a whole host of troubles.

Deborah was the wife of an alumnus and the daughter of one of a CEO of one of the sponsors, more precisely that of aforementioned Blix.

The two of them announced the impending middle school ball, thusly pleasing the kids at first glance.

But there was a hitch: The kids had to fill in some sort of personality test.

Needless to say, the pupils that had been subjected to the recent career weeks were all but happy about more questionaries. Some of them thought closely about skipping the whole ball altogether.

Truth spoken, the questionaries were only thinly veiled as assessments for the school ball, but really some sort of demoscopic tool, created for purposes mentioned by David Bender at the beginning of the lessons. This was no different from the assessments for the career week.

For example, there were questions about the favourite fruit of the students. Of course there was no reason in arguing whether the preference of bananas over apples — or vice versa — were of any relevance for the school ball: There was absolutely no sense in including such a question. So how had this topic made it into the questionary? The answer is — of course — the fact that at least one of the sponsors was most interested in knowing about the preferences of the kids:

Soft drink vendor Blix was planning a new campaign, and they wanted to know which fruit flavours they needed to include. We have already seen the interests of this sponsor at work when talking about Quinn Pensky's research for genetical manipulation of banana shrubs, and we will see a lot more of them later on.

It was really sad that the teacher did not actually know what he was doing, and he failed utterly to see the connection between the topic of his classes of the day and the questionaries distributed for the school ball. This conforms that Bender, inspite of being a decen t pedagogue, was little to nothing more than a tool of those who ruled over life and death of everyone here at Pacific Coast Academy.

But did the pupils at least understand that the whole questionary action was primary a tool for scanning the potential market?

Well, the only one who had at least started to care was still Zoë Brooks, and this was not going to change that soon.

* * *

**10:2:2 The Program**

Quinn Pensky did not see any problems with this test. There was a good reason for her to stay calm, as opposed to all the orther students who feared being matched with some random person: The geek princess from Seattle had written the program used for the matching for the ball. She had written that app in order to impress the responsibles of Pear Electronics, as she was still extremely interested in getting a contract as a professional developer of applications for mobile telecommunication devices.

Natalie Schorr was well aware of the potential that the whole personality test had got for Pear Electronics.

As aforementioned, Quinn Pensky had already got a boyfriend: Mark Del Figgalo. For that reason, she was not interested in metting any othe rboy, random or not, at least not officially in the public.

But there was no problem. Mark was unable to fill in the test on his own, and thus he was glad when Quinn offered him to do this on his behalf.

And if anyone knew how to cheat efficiently in this test, it was of course Quinn, the person that had programmed it.

* * *

**10:2:3 Filling In The Questionaries**

For Logan Reese, there was absolutely no problem: He simply wrote what an uncomparable guy he was. Or, rather, he had paid some middle school boy top do the typing work for him, and he just dictated the appropriate words.

Dana Cruz operated in a fairly similar manner. She bullied some of the freaks — such as Neil Wosniacki — into typing everything for her.

Ditzy Nicole Bristow was of course still totally excited, because she was looking forward to going to the prom ball with some excessively cute and cool guy. For that reason, she was only writing about cute boys all the way.

Chase Matthews wanted of course to go to the middle school ball with his crush Zoë Brook, as he feared losing her to some Logan-like jerk of the worst sort. He knew that his room mate would not try to steal the blond Mary Sue off him, as he had done recently in the wake of the school play about the perfect alien girl Zorca. But he believed that the only way to persuade the computer into allowing for this was that of stealing her answers.

At least that was what superjerk Logan Reese had made his room mate — of whom he had still got an excessively low opinion — believe. Of course, the teenage dandy from Beverly Hills was only interested in getting Chase even more embarrassed by sneaking after the blond Mary Sue and copy her answers. He hoped totally that the bushy dork would get caught and then be rebuked severely. Logan was already looking forward to making fun of a heartbroken wailing shrub.

Chase even tried to ask out Dustin about his sister. But this did not really work, because the fact that the dance was only for middle school kids had left Zoey's little in a stinky mood.

* * *

**10:3 The Matches**

* * *

**10:3:1 The Fake Girl**

Michael Barret had been condemned to take care of some exotic exchange student, a girl named Ollie Biallo. Well, he had assumed that she was a girl, but he was thoroughly mistaken.

But Ollie Biallo was a fake in many a respect, not just concerning his gender. His real name was not Olivary, or Ollie, or Ally — as assumed wrongly by Michael. He was really no other than aforementioned Jerome Crony, one of the bully students from James K. Polk Middle School. So, what was he doing here at Pacific Coast Academy?

Michael should have seen Crony upon the basketball matches, but this was excusable because Crony was nothing but a substitue.

Only in the last match of the state finals did Crony show up on the field, and he had even performed some good moves. Alas, he had not acted freely, but he had always been commanded forth and back by William Loomer, the boss of the bully trio Crony belonged to.

Now Michael was of course aware of that, but it took him a few minutes in order to realise that he had already faced Crony during said match.

Upon Loomer's command, Jerry Crony alias Olivary Biallo had pulled Michael's pants. He had been stopped by Logan Reese, though, and been sent off the fielsd for a few minutes by umpire Pierson.

Needless to say, Michael Barret was not actualkly happy once realising the identity of his exchange student — falsely so-called.

Crony tried to distract Michael by keeping on feigning that he was unfamiliar with American habits, and that in some totally annoying manner. He had tried hard to learn some exotic habits from a teenage girl known as **Farfalla**.[10:3]

The girl's name, an italian word for _butterfly_, was probably as fake as Crony's statement that she was his younger sister.

In the beginning, Michael seemed temped to believe some of Jerry Crony's lies, and he was soon enough ready to just get along with it by ignoring the blathering stranger as long as possible.

But things went worse when it turned out that Jerry Crony was not just assigned as Michael's exchange student, but also as his dance partner for the middle school ball.

And even Jerome Crony was only a fake name. The proper identity of the guy was **Marshal Rivera**. He was a secret worshipper of the cult of ancient goddess Selene, as will be made more explicit down below. In addition, he was a passionate tailor and fashion designer, almost like Zoë Brooks. He would have been made a lot of fun of for that, and thus he tried to pass as a bully, following brutal William Loomer and the cold killer face Buzz Rodriguez, forming a trio of bullies. He was the only guy in the tailoring club of James K. Polk Middle School, but very few pupil knew that. He did not want Loomer to know about it, for the above reasons.

* * *

**10:3:2 Logan And Dana**

When the students had glared at the bulletin board that listed the pairings for the impending school ball, there had be quite a few consternated faces.

The worst case had been that of Logan Reese and Dana Cruz, who had been obviously assigned as partners. This was completely justified, as both of them were arrogant jocks.

They glared at each other with excessive disgust foer over half an hour.

But the computer had done the right thing — beyond any doubt.

This time, it was Chase Matthews to make fun of what had happened to Logan Reese, but his grin would soon pass away.

* * *

**10:3:3 Nicole And Nicolas**

Nicole Bristow was assigned to one **Nicholas Webber**, a seventh grader of the particularly ditzy sort, pretty similar to Nicole.

Once more, the infallible computer had done exactly the right thing.

It was pretty obvious that both of them were totally excited for 6that reason. But during the ball, they would have to hear each other talk, which was like having to listen to themselves. Would they even be able to bear that?

* * *

**10:3:4 Misguided**

Chase had tried hard to follow Zoey Brooks all around the campus in order to sneak her answers for the assessment. And he was not alone in this quest, many others did the same.

But, fortunately, Zoey Brooks had had enough of all the boys abusing her, and she had decided to fool the boys into giving absurd answers. In turn, she did not submit her own questionary at all, and she was ready to observe from afar where ebverything was going to end up.

As a result, the guys trying to steal her answers got assign random girls that they better had not tried to mess with.

Zoey hoped that those perverted and thoroughly misguided boys would finally start turning suspicious of the whole absurd system.

Chase, for example, was assigned to aforementioned Jennifer Mosely alias Moze from James K. Polk Middle School, whom he had already encountered upon the state finals of the Californian middle school basketball league. He was thoroughly shocked because he had not expected that his plan had failed miserably. And as Mosely was fairly huge for a middle school girl, he was totally scared and intimidated. Already during the basketball match, he had been consternated over and over again because Jennifer was such a domineering beast. Chase saw himself unable to handle her.

* * *

**10:4 Dance The Night Away**

* * *

**10:4:1 Dancing Floor**

Olivary Biallo — or whatever was his real name — was about to rob Michael's last nerves. For example, he insisted in holding a corn crop upright when chewing it.

Michael Barret, on the other hand, tried hard to teach him that corn crops are to be held transversally, at least here in America.

But his own insane efforts were badly sabotaged by Chase Matthews who followed rather Ollie Biallo's example.

Of course there was no law as of howto hold your corn crop.

But Michael Barret had practised with a transversally held flute for several years already, and now he thought that flutes held upright were somewhat abnormal, and that they should disappear from the face of the earth. Dur to his flute practice, he had been accustomed increasingly to holding everything transversally, not only the flute. This explains his iron rule about eating corn crops in a certain manner.

Nicholas Webber and Nicole Bristow apparently liked the same things, and they were equally ditzy chatters — all evening through. But this way, they started to annoy each other, which was such an infinite pity, as they were really one of the most perfect couples — ever!

Chase himself was totally unable to handle Moze, who was disgusted by his bushy hair and requested him to shave it off. He had finally got enough of it all, and so he disappeared in the toilets in order to send an emergency message via his mobile telephone. The news were destined for Dustin Brooks, whom he wanted to break into the ball room and take over Jennifer Mosely. Then he would spend the whole night in the toilets, because he was feeling incredibly bad for having cheated in the questionary, and he would have to vomit on and off.

Quinn Pensky and Mark Del Figgalo were at the party as well, but they were hardly noticed by any one. The reason for this was that thye were hiding behind some rubber tree, and Quinn was up to performing perverted stuff with her naïve boyfriend — for scientific purposes. Fortunately, the noise of the party was much too loud, interrupting their feeble attempts over and over again.

Dana Cruz and Logan Rerese kept on throwing insults art each other and to step deliberately on each other's feet. But both of them enjoyed this immensely, because they were extreme sadomasochists. This proves that they were one great couple, exactly like Nicole Bristow and Nicholas Webber.

Unfortunately, this straightforward fact was not yet obvious for those teenagers, as some corrupt and decadent society had made them believe into the perverse superstition that opposites attracted. Only some great intervention would have been able to change that and make justice happen.

The music here was a bit less than optimal. There was no band, only records and yukeboxes. The reason for this was the unfortunate fact that Drake Parker was currently not able to perform, or otherwise he would have made it hereto in order to make the middle school kids rock and roll all over the dancing floor.

But there was one exception: Some taped song _Wish I Was With You Tonight_[10:4] had become immediately the absolute favourite of a huge amount of Pacific Coast Academy pupils, even of those that had not been present at the school dance. Once more, the lyrics for that masterpiece had been written by aforementioned Adelaide Singer, with a tune composed by resident Wendy Gellar. The voice had been borrowed from hitherto little beknownst future pop idol **Lisa Perkins**, a girl that would join Pacific Coast Academy at some later point.

Michael was still the most annoyed pupil in the dancing hall, but he was finally released.

Olivary Biallo alias Jerome Crony decided to have to pray to the moon, and therefore he needed to leave the hall and kneel down in front of the full moon that was shining brightly. He forced Michael to take care of said Farfalla, still falsely tbelieved to be his little sister.

Of course she was not that small, but a seventh grade girl like Jerome himself. Anbd she was definitely not his sister.

All of a sudden, Michael Barret changed his judgment of the current night, and he started to sweep the the exotic maid across the dancing floor where it was all glirtz and sparkles … at least for a few hours.. Unfortubnately, he did not know that he had promised to marry Farfalla — by his way of dancing, and according to the customns of her tribe. Sooner or later, he would be aware of this, but would it be too late by then?

Wayne "Firewire" Gilbert felt like run over by a truck. His ball date for the night was one **Evelyn Kwong** from Brewster Middle School, a totally aggressive nerd girl. OK, he had it totally coming as well.

* * *

**10:4:2 Alone In The Moonlight**

Zoë Brooks had not been participating in the school dance, and instead, she was sitting alone at the rim of the fountain in the middle of the campus square.

Well, she was not all alone, but Dustin had joined her. The little bugger would have loved to make it to the school dance, but elementary school kids were not allowed there.

It was a lovely full moon night in spring 2005, a circumstance that made both of them a bit sad.

Suddenly, Dustin received aforementioned emergency call by Chase Matthews. Now he left his sister behind at the campus, as he was looking forward to dancing with aforementioned Jenifer Mosely. He would have to sneak in through the toilet window and exchange clothes with Chase. He would also have to wear stilts in order to look more like an eighth grade kid, though.

Zoey Brooks was now all alone, and she sighed even more while the cool light of the full moon made her fair hair almost glow.

* * *

**10:4:3 Moon Goddess Zoë**

Jerome Crony alias Olivary Biallo alias Marshal Rivera hadd just left the building in order to pray to the moon. As aforementioned, he was a worsjipper of moon goddess Selene. Now he was crossing the campus slowly in order to find the best place for his prayers and other cultic activities.

Zoë Brooks, on the other hand, stood lonely at her fountain, almost like during the day dream in which I had appeared.

Jerome Crony kept on walking, randomly towards the fountain. All of a sudden, he saw the faint outlines of Zoey, lulled by the moonlight. As a seeker of the path of the mighty Selene, he could not help but seeing this as a heavenly sign: His adored moon goddess must have come down to him in order to listen to his prayers, right on sight — or so he concluded. He started making some cultic moves next to "Selene"

Zoë Brooks giggled. "OK, timne for a little dance!" In the pale mopon light, she had not been able to identify Vrony, though.

The dance only lasted for a few minutes.

Would the two of them ever meet each other in the plain daylight again, and would they realise who had been their dance partner?

* * *

**10:5 Coconut Flavoured**

As we have seen, Quinn Pensky was conducting a lot of research sponsored by Los-Angeles based soft drink giant Blix.

Some of it had already turned out as a big failure, such as the attempt of cossing apples and bananas. But this did not mean that she was willing to give up on it, especially not since Melinda Crenshaw had joined the troop. But for the time being, she was on a different track.

The aforementioned questionaries veiled as personality tests for a school ball had reveiled that many teenagers deemed the scent of coconuts as very attractive. And for that reason, Quinn pensky was now about constructing some new atrificial flavour emulating that of these fruits.

Quinn knew very well that coconuts were not nuts, but drupes. Unfortunately, she had to deal with a huge bunch of exorbitantly ignorant and miseducated fellow students such as Nicole Bristow and Dana Cruz who refused to acknowledge this truth. Even her boyfriend Mark Del Figgalo had to be rebuked over and over again for niscategorising these fruits in an embarrassing manner.

Girls were still excluded from the science club's laboratories. Melinda Crenshaw was still busily planning to change this for the beginning of the next academic year.

But nowadays Quinn used the regular chemistry laboratory classes for this avail. She was always early, as she knew everythiong better than the dumb scienmce teachers. This gave her additional time during science classes, and thus the opportunity of using the facilities for her extracurricular activities sponsored by Blix Soft Drinks. Unfortunately, she was working on several projects at the same time.

To be more precise, Quinn Pensky's studies of the human nervous system and its weaknesses were still in full progress. She had already tested seveal ways of disabling human consciusness temporarily, such as electric currents, ultrasonic waves, and nerve pinching with mechanic devices. Those studies were still far from completed, but there was one way she had just started to explore: The usage of chemical methods for narcotising people and neutralising their brain activities for a limited period.

Her attempts to fool Michael's taste nerves had already pointed towards a similar direction, unfortunately not exactly as expected. She had used radioactivity in order to influence the nerves of his tongue, but she had actually disabled the motorics instead of just manipulating the sensory nerves.

Fortunately, Michael had recovered in the mean time, but he was not aware of the fact that Quinn's research was still going on, and that he was by no means safe, exactly like his friends.

Before the recent spring fling, Quinn had been forced to interrupt the experiment with sleep and sleep withdrawal, especially sleep walking. But she did not even consider anything near giving up on it, instead she was up to changing the rules by repeating the experiment soon again, just not with Dustin Brooks as her one and only test person. Quite the contrary, she wanted to figure whether achemically induced sleep was able to produce symptoms of somnambulia. All she needed to do was combining the chemicals for the coconut flavour with the somniferic substances she had invented at the same time. She wanted to let all her friends, including herself, breath the sweet, coconut like scent from one of her test tubes. With hidden cameras, she would observe whether there were any signs of sleepwalking. Now she just needed to wait for the perfect moment for her experiment.

* * *

**10:6 Concluding Party**

The first coeducational academic year was about to come to its conclusion.

After the last exam, there was a traditional beach party for all students of this most elitarian and illustrious boarding school of California.

This was a fairly new trend, though, dating to the times after the war of Vietnam. There had been nothing like that during my life time, at least not as a beach party.

Nowadays, the party was scheduled at **Mystic Beach**[10:5] in Orange County. This was quite a bunch of miles away from the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, and this fact should make you wonder why this place had been chosen.

After all, our campus was bordering the sandy beach of Malibu, and you have probably expected that such a party would run right here.

There was of course an official reason for that, and this included safety and insurance conditions. The beach was — in a nutshell — two small for a party with some thousand students, and there were dangerous cliffs and rocks nearby.

This was not quite false, but the school did after all little for the security of the students, although there were of course laws for that, and there were a lot of rules in the school's manual, rules laid down by Leo Bradford and his father. We will return to this fact later down the road. Alas, the proper reason had been long term contracts made by the board of sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy with former alumni running some quite profitabvle business at Mystic Beach.

* * *

**10:7 Last Exams And Tutoring**

* * *

**10:7:1 Under Pressure**

This was the week of the last exams of the running academic year, and many pupils were in a total stress. This was especially the case for those students whose scholarships depended a lot on the results of these exams.

All eighth graders were under pressure, because the impending tests were also assessment for the classes they woulkd be allowed to take during high school, especially the AP classes which would later on be most important for the acceptance by the better college.

Only a few students were self confident enough to go through all the terror without any tutoring. Zoë Brooks was such a rare and most honourable exception.

Nicole Bristow had been submitted to voluntary tutoring — probably be her parents — already early during this academic year.[10:6] But she had hardly become any smarter this way, because she had always been distracted by too many cute boys.

* * *

**10:7:2 Zoey Teaches Half Of PCA**

* * *

**10:7:2:1 Logan And Haikus**

While Zoë Brooks was — at leat during this academic year — definitely not in need of tutoring, she was one of the most busy tutors on the campus.

Fore example, Logan Reese needed help in his literature classes. The test was about varuious forms of poetries, and he was struggling with haikus. When told by Zoey to write one of thse, he came up with some perverted jerkish statement about his qualities as a supreme womaniser. This was of course totally disgusting for Zoey.

Zoey was thoroughly appalled and sent Logan home on site, deciding that tutoring such a complete jerk was not worth the trouble.

* * *

**10:7:2:2 Quinn And French For Vandals**

Even Quinn Pensky needed the help of the blond Mary Sue in French, because she was not content with a _B_ — or so she had claimed. Actually, she was the best in written tests in her French classes. But she pretended to have problems with the correct intonation. Really, she wanted to be able to know how to boast in French about the worst accidents that her scientific experiments had hitherto caused, such as melting her father's most expensive automobile.

As we had seen before, Zoë excelled in French, but she had to think about the offer she had received from aforementioned French boarding school in Meudon near Paris. She had hitherto not really considered leaving her friends alone in the dark, especially not her little brother. But she had already examined the web site of said school, and she was more than just a little bit impressed. She knew that the school was conducted by one **Monique Chaumont**,[10:7], and she admired that lady very much.

During the Christmas break, Zoey's parents had been informed about the offer, and they were keen on that offer. Nevertheless, they did not want to push their daughter, especially because of they knew that separating Dustin and Zoey again would have been really cruel.

On the other hand, non of the kids in Zoey's gang had yet been informed about her potential plans of moving abroad for high school. There was still more than one year left for her to decide on the subject, and Zoey wanted to wait untyil it was absolutely necessary.

However, when Dustin had been bullied severely by Dana Cruz, while she was rehearsing for the school play as an alien girl, Zoey had thought strongly abou sending Dana instead to that French boarding school. Thgis way, she would also have separated the bully Latina from ditzy wench Nicole Bristow. Zoey had grown increasingly annoyed by the ongoing arguments of her two bickering room mates, and she hated having to stand in the crossfire almost all of the time. Zoë had been close to informing Dana's parents about the programme, and to sacrofice her own chance in order to flatter Dana out of her life.

Although Meudon Prep School was about as comfortable and illustrious as Pacific Coast Academy, Dana would sooner or later have felt it as a punishment, because she hated learning foreign languages — conpletely unlike Zoë Brooks.

This year, Zoey did not have to come to a decision, but sooner or later, she would be under pressure.

* * *

**10:7:2:3 Chase And Genetics**

Chase Matthews was struggling with the Mendel laws of genetics, and he needed the help of Zoë Brooks for that reason.

The blond Mary Sue chose a few examples for these biological facts, including finally the question what colour the eyes of her own and Chase's babies would have, if they had been married. Of course she was talking purely hypothetically.

Unfortunately, Chase read too much into her question. "Yes, we are going to marry!"

Zoey looked aghast. "Hey, that was an example!"

Chase was thoroughly disappointed. But he was not going to give up on Zoë that soon, although he had upset her badly in the wake of the school dance.

* * *

**10:7:2:4 Michael And Algebra**

Michael Barret had ggot huge problems with the theory of quadratic equations.

Unfortunately, Zoeë Brooks failed miserably motivating him probably, She just repeated the relevant formula over and over again, but there was no chance to get it into his btainless head.

Too bad it would have been so easy getting him to learn this.

Fortunately, Zoë Brooks sentb the dumbass away after two hours of fruitless attempts, and straight into the fangs of Quinn Pensky.

The geek girl knew of course everything about quadratic equations, but she also knew what they were good for, and especially what Michael needed them for:

Under certain idealised conditions, a thrown basketball described a quadratic parabola.

As we remember, Quinn had been excessively miserable during her first attempots of playing basketball. Thereupon, she had tried hard to approach this game with her analytic reason, and she had discovered that free throws were essentially based on geometry and the physics of gravitation.[10:8]

Michael gasped when he was taught about the connections. "So, with this formula, I will master free throws even better than ever before?"

Quinn Pensky nodded most solemnly. Then she drew a few sketches in order to show what was going on.

Michael was now fully motivated, and he was able to learn the required formula in no time and to never ever forget it. In addition, he would even score a lot more free throws during the following season.

While Quinn was usually a miserable tutor due to her social incompetence and her extraterrestric intelligence that made communication with mere humans an excessively tough business,[10:9] she excelled in those rare cases.

* * *

**10:7:2:5 Dustin And Little Babies**

Then she needed to tutor Dustin in geometry.

Well, Dustin had claimed so, but was he really needy?

As we have seen before, Dustin was — even as a fourth grader — a member of the middle school team, able to compete with mathematical geniuses such as aforementioned Albert Wormenheimer. There was nothing at all he would have been able to learn from his elder sister — quite the contrary!

Really, Dustin had lied about all this in order to be able to get Zoey's attention in order to get an opportunity to talk to his sister about some very important topic. "Will you now tell me where the little babies come from?"

Zoë Brooks was a bit shocked when hearing about that, because she thought her baby brother much too young to even think about that topic. In addition, it would have been a very embarrassing chapter to talk about for about each and every older sister.

So, why had Dustin wanted to know about the origin of little babies? As completely opposed to his sister's assumptions, he was no longer that small and innocent elementary boy, but he had already started coveting girls to some degree. He had already thought about Wendy Gellar and about Ashley Blake, although both of the girls were apparently no good for him. And since the recent middle school ball, he had also started hankering after Jennifer Mosely. Dustin wanted to find the right girl as soon as only possible, and then he wanted to marry and have at least two kids right away: a girl and a boy, just like Zoey and himself. He was under the impression that it took many years to make a baby, just like building a house from scratch. For that reason, he wanted to learn doing so as soon as only possible. He just knew that it took a boy and a girl in order to make a baby, and Zoey was the only girl he dared to talk about this topic. Where else would he have found a greater expert about girls' stuff?

* * *

**10:8 Trip To The Beach**

* * *

**10:8:1 All Asleep**

The last tests had finally been written.

Dustin Brooks had successfully requested to be allowed to accompany his sister and her friends on their trip to Mystic Beach. Otherwise he would have been forced to come with his class mates, But Dustin wanted to try once more to get his sister to teach him about the above topic, or — alternatively — to ask any of her friends.

Zoey, Logan, Michael, Quinn, Dana, Chase, and Nicole were now sitting together in the lounge in order to celebrate the end of the tests and the trip to a cool beach party.

Quinn saw the right moment for her experiment. She lied that she had just randomly invented something that smelled like coconut essence, and she wanted all of her friends take a sniff.

The naïve kids fell for the geek princess's explanations, and they started greedily sniffling the pink liquid hidden in some test tube. Just as expected, they fell now asleep on site — one by one!

It had not been hard to establish all the hidden cams.

However, none of Quinn's friends showed any sign of sleepwalking.

* * *

**10:8:2 Waking Up In Time**

The whole gang woke up an hour later, one by one.

The only exception was Dustin Brooks, because he was still a lot more luightweight than all the graduating middle school kids.

Quinn had not considered that beforehand, as Dustin was opriginally not supposed to hang out here with Zoey's gang.

Anyways, it was now really late, and the kids still had to catch their bus to Mystic Beach.

Unfortunately they would now have to carry Dustin all the way to the bus stop— along with his luggage. The latter was heavier than the little bugger himself. And the last bis was already about to depart. It was impossible to arrive in time, complete with Dustin.

Suddenly, Zoey's cellular telephone rang. She picked it up, noticing that it was Drake Parker.

The teenage rock star announced that he was in Los Angeles right now, and that he would have loved to sing a few songs for the Pacific Coast Academy kids at their beach party. But he did not know the way.

Unfortunately, the only one who really knew the correct way to Mystic Beach was Dustin brooks, and that baby bugger was still asleep.

Logan believed to know the way, but he was a complete idiot without any knowledge in geography.[10:10]

Zoey decided to sent her friends into the last bus, leaving her and Dustin behind on the campus. Then they would wait for Drake parker and Joshua Nichols.

The bigheaded dork — or so Wendy Gellar had told Zoey — was an expert for reading geographic maps and using a compass,[10:11] which meantb that they would find their way to Mystic Beach, anyways.

* * *

**10:9 Mystic Beach Party**

Finally, Drake's car had reached the beach, right for a clittle mystic beach concert with tunes by Wendy Gellar and lyrics by Adelaide Singer.

Dustin had finally understood that Zoë was not willing to answer his question about the origin of little babies. Thus he decided to ask all-knowing Quinn about it. He imagined that biologists and medical scientists like Quinn Pensky were needed for making babies in the same way as architects and civil engineeers for the creation of new houses.

Quinn had got no problems explaining the whole thing unto Dustin, using excessively rare words and drawing complicated pictures with her fingers into the wet sands of the beach. "Does this answer your question?"

Dustin smiled. "Cool! Now I just need to find an appropriate girl!" He looked around.

Alas, Zoey brooks was not exactly pleased when she noticed Quinn Pensky's lessons for Dustin

* * *

**10:10 Graduation Celebration**

Middlke school graduations were not as traditional as high school graduation ceremonies, not evenb here at Pacific Coast Academy, but they were there, and they had been already back in the fifties.

As a rule, middle school kids always tended to wish their graduation events to be more and more like those of high schools and even colleges.

Mr. Bender had been assigned the job of a master of ceremonies, or whatever it was called. He was going to call the students one by one in order to hand them the middle school diploma and some stingray medal.

The latter was fairly knew, but a cheap copy of a medal that had been used at our gigh school ceremonies already in the fifties.

I had always hated the whole pompous business before my untimely death, and this had not yet been changed.

Anyways, one of the most important part of solemn celebrations like this graduation were long speeches.

This time around, Leo Bradford was present in order to give the official speech of the representants of Pacific Coast Academy. His way of talking was even more annoying than the boring rhythm of sermons held by Dean Rivers.

Of course there was also a speaker for the middle school kids that were about to graduate, a so-called valedictorian. And this time around, Zoey Brooks had been chosen for this important office.

Leo Bradford was consternated. "A girl? How is that possible?"

Naturally, Zoey Brooks was the first girl in this office, simply because there had been no girls graduating ever before from a school that had always been a boy school.

And — as aforementioned — Mr. Bradford had been vehemently opposed to coeducation for the longest time, and he had been overpowered only after some long debates by the board of sponsors — for the aforementioned reasons. But now he was really up to walking through the roof.

Zoey's task as a valedictorian had been subject to controversial discussions for quite a few weeks.

Like Bradford, Logan Reese was still adamantly oppposed to girls talking in the public. He had tried hard to stop the school's administration, who had chosen Zoey among a list of suggestions, and he had incited a lot of boys to join his initiative.

But Garth Berman had insisted in letting Zoë Brooks talk, because she had not only got the best overall grades, but also worked very efficiently during her internship in the school's administration office. Now he was troubled for that by Bradford.

There was some problem with the students' outfits, though.

There had never been a need for graduate gowns for female students, simply because there had not been any female students at all.

This year, Rivers had noticed the problem only too late.

Zoë Brooks had suggested to design and to tailor appropriately ornamented gowns for the female middle school graduates, but she had been denied to do so.

Just as in the case of the cheerleaders' suits, the sponsors had got a say, and they needed to approve everything, as the outfits at official events of the elitarian prep school were representing the sponsors in the public.

And indeed, quite a few journalists were about to attend the graduation ceremony.

Even Bradford was upset, because he did not think that it was appropriate for girls to walk around in boys' outfit. He still deemed the female pupils students of an inferior cast, and he wanted that to be expressed somehow via their suits.

Nicole Bristow was most disappointed, because she hated looking almost like a boy. She had to hide her long hair under the hollow square hat that was part and parcel of the outfit.

There was no official school orchestra to perform at the graduartion event, and thus Dean Rivers had hired Megan parker from San Diego in order to perform something on her oboe: _Should Auld Acquaintance_ by immortal **Robert Burns**.

Almost everyone tried to sing along.

**_"_**  
Should auld acquaintance be forgot  
And never brought to mind  
Should auld acquaintance be forgot  
For auld lang syne.

For auld lang syne, my jo  
For auld lang syne  
Let's take a cup o' kindness yet  
For auld long syne.  
**_"_**

Many kids would have wished for something more modern, such as a cool rock tune performed by Drake Parker, but they would have to fight for this first.

After Megan's performance, many tears filled the eyes of the students, teachers, visitors, staff, and guests.

And now it was finally time for the valedictorian's speech. Zoë Brooks stood all excited at the microphone. She started talking a few words of general thanks, also on the behalf of her fellow pupils. She was especially supposed to thanl the sponsors in the name of all girls for their generosity of having opened the gates of this most illustrious boarding school for them. But during the last weeks, she had come to understand more and more that the sponsors had not been generous, but just selfish, and that the opening of the school for girls had just meant adding another new and lowest step to an old hierarchy. Was she really up to thanking Blix Soft Drinks, Pear Electronics, Schneider's Bakery, Qualitech and so on for welcoming her and the other girls as a new set of toys and tool for improving and upgrading their own fame and wealth to hitherto unbeknownst dimensions?

On the other hand, critical words would have upset many people, and not even been appreciated by those on whose behalf Zoë Brooks was talking, the students, and especially the female ones, here at Pacific Coast Academy.

Zoey had started talking at a normal pace, but after a few sentences, she tended more and more towards stammering, until … she collapsed right behind the microphone, unable to continue. Her remorses had overpowered her sense for duty and honour.

Many onlookers were totally consternated.

Especially Dustin Brooks went pale when he was forced to see his sister collapse in front of his eyes. "Zoey!"

Fortunately, Doctor Glazer was a visitor of the event. He wanted to congratulate his niece right afterwards, but now he had to take care of her as a medic.

Quinn Pensky came to his assistance. She suggested to treat her 'girl next door' right with electric shocks and with chemicals that she had designed as the countermedic to the coconut flavoured narcotic.

Zoë Brooks would recover later on due to Glazer's and Quinn's skilled medical care. But the reasons for Zoey's collapse were not gone: She hated being the glamour girl promoted by a selfish system of sponsors and overseers.

How would the blond Mary Sue be able to manage this dilemma during her high school years at Pacific Coast Academy? And would her friends also come to understand the situation?

* * *

**Chapter 11 Power Failure**

* * *

**11:1 Returning To The Campus**

The summer break was now finally over, and the students were about to return to the campus of Pacific Coast Academy for the second year of coeducation.

Many people in the administration had hoped that the start into this second year was less chaotic than the previous one, as they had learned from eventual mistakes and confusions. but this was not necessarily the case.

The number of girls had increased, implying the necessity of a second dormitory room for girls. For that avail, some dormitory halls and other buildings had to be reingineered and restyled. Girls tended to like pink walls — as completely opposed to boys. But that was really just a minor cosmetic correction.

The new girls' dormitory room was **Brenner Hall**, a nice place named for an alumnus and sponsor that had graduated from Pacific Coast Academy during the times of the war of Vietnam, and who was now an important officer of the navy of the United States Of America.

There were some new students on the campus, especially new girls, and there had also been some departures.

And those who returned to the realms of the almighty stingray had spent their summer break thinking about the previous academic year, and dreaming about possibilities for the new one.

* * *

**11:2 Summer Experiences**

* * *

**11:2:1 Nicole's Weeks In Kansas**

Nicole Bristow had spent most of her summer break in her home stante — Kansas! As usual, she had been bored to death by the boys from that reason.

There was one exception, though: A boy from a corn farm not far away from the Bristow residence had recently graduated from **Harvard Medical School**, clearly nothing quite usual, not even in the metropolitan regions, let alone the rural flyover states. The name of this guy was now **Dr. Nussbaum**.[11:1]

And now Nicole Bristow had got a major crush on that teenage young man, to the degree of making an utter fool of herself. Well, honestly said, the ditzy wench did not have to change at all in order to achieve that goal.

And — just as usual — this was a fairly onesided thing, as no guy with some whatever poor remains of a self esteem would have liked her back.

But now it is time to look back at her last academic year:

Nicole had made the cut, but only because her room pal Zoey had made almost all of her assigned homeworks and talked her several times out of pop up exams in which she would have failed as miserably as can bem because she had spent too much time pondering the next cute boy down across the campus, or the even cuter lad across the class room, instead of paying attention to the words of the teacher.

Needless to say, Zoey was little pleased by the fact of having to fish her room mate and best friend out of the toxic swamp after each second clumsy step made by the ditzy wench.

Nicole's parents had heard next to nothing about their daughter's real difficulties in California, and that's why they did not see any reason to do anything about it. They were even keen on Nicole's job as a vendor for thge coffee cart, and they were now inclined to let her sell more drinks in their home town pub for children.

There were many corn fields in the plains of Kansas, producing lot of corn syrup — among other products. This tough liquid was used in order to sweeten many juices that were not as sweet by nature as desired by the customers. But also lots of sweet pastry were prepared with corn sugar instead of cane sugar, especially American fatcakes, unlike their Canadian brethren. [11:2] The Bristows not only sold juices and smoothie blenders, but also lots of corn sugar, and the latter even to customers outside Kansas.

Schneider's Bakery and Blix Softfrinks were already buying corn sugar off the Bristows, but way not as much as the Bristow family had wished.

A lot of responsibility for the family business was thus lying on the shoulders of the ditzy wench.

* * *

**11:2:2 Dana's Martial Camp**

Dana Cruz had enrolled in a camp for martial arts, where she had trained her physical self control even more, but not her fits of wrath and bad temper. Now she was able to crack steel plates with several body parts.

Unfortunately, camp adviser Nakata Ishikawa,[11:3] had been scared so much by her appearance that he had been forced to quit the camp for the fear of his life. The same martial coach had once made bad experiences with Joshua Nichols in San Diego.

The bigheaded dork had been the absolutely worst student of karate since the start of the big kung fu fever.

Dana was the exact contrary: a total killer machine, stoppable at most by some thermonuclear catastrophe. But she had not been the only person in the camp with these properties, as will be made clear later on … she would have been kicked off Pacific Coast Academy for bullying and vandalism, had her room pal Zoë Brooks not showed a lot of mercy. She would undergo anger management classes during the following academic year, though. But even this had been arranged by Zoey in a way that avoided public attention.

But would the impending anger management training be in vain? Many had got their doubts about it.

* * *

**11:2:3 Quinn's Summer Inventions**

Quinn Pensky's scientific activities during her last year of middle school had been largely successful, but she was nowhere near content yet. She needed to investigate the human nervous system even more. She was particularly in a stinky mood because she was still not allowed to the science club.

It was evident that she either had to humiliate Wayne Gilbert with a most impressive result of her research, or to get one of the sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy that supported her research to enforce her admission to the stingray science club.

During the academic year, Melinda Crenshaw had turned out as a most valuable backup, but — unfortunately — as a most formidable rival, in the case that the sponsors started to cut down the supplies and decided to support only one researcher.

* * *

**11:2:4 Zoey's Recovery**

The collapse of Zoë Brooks upon her valedictorian's speech had of course not been a subject of pleasant news for her family, although the Mary Sue had recovered very fast from that.

But being back on her feet did not mean in any way that Zoë Brooks was over the dilemma that had caused her to break down in front of the graduation audience. Quite the contrary: Her remorses kept on growing.

Zoey was a good swimmer, and thus she tried to distract herself from the mental struggles by working as a bay watch at the nearby beach, more precisely at **Pacific Bluff**. Unfortunately, she was reminded very much of Mystic Beach and its overcommercialisation driven by some of the sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy.

**Kelly Peckinpaw**, a — or so hoped Zoey — not so close relative of Wayne 'Fire Wire' Gilbert, seemed to admire Zoë Brooks a lot. She was about to move on from Pacific Bluff's elementary school to its middle school. Unfortunately, she did not really notice the troubles seen by her freshly discovered example to live up to.

* * *

**11:3 New Students**

* * *

**11:3:1 Lola Martinez**

One of the most important new students was a certain **Victoria Gloria Martinez De La Vega**,[11:4] a high school freshman — or freshgirl — of obviously Hispanic origin. She was definitely to be considered a Latino beauty, and along with her skills in entertainment, especially acting, she was absolutely looking forward to a great career in the Hollywood business. She was usually known as Lola Martinez, and nobody at Pacific Coast Academy knew more about her full name.

Like Ashley Blake, she had been sent by her mother to Pacific Coast Academy in the case that her career as an actress would have turned out as a dead end. She would certainly also have been a great teacher for English and Spanish, and there had been quite some need for those in certain regions with a majority of Latinos.

Lola's ancestors had been members of the decadent bourgeois cast of **Fulgencio Batista** that had ruled over Cuba until the end of the fifties, when the whole regime got swept away by the revolution of **Fidel Castro** alias **El Supremo**. They had been subsequently forced to leave the tropic island, and they found an exile in the United States , due to the connections between the Cuban upper class and American companies investing huge amounts of their capital in the economy of that island state.[11:5] This included both agriculture and the night club scene in the big cities, especially Havana.

As you may easily see, the Cuban revolution had been almost running parallel to my life on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy. And it is now the right time to approach more closely the circumstances of the untimely end of my life in flesh and blood.

Some of the sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy had been among the American supporters of the regime of Fulgencio Batista, and thus responsible for the exploitation of broad masses of the Cuban population. At the same time, I had been the ringleader of a small bunch of students that protested against the imperialist policy of American politicians and enterprisers. For that reason, the board of sponsors had to get rid of me.

Of course this does not mean that I had to hate Lola for the deeds of her ancestry, so that's enough of this topic — at least for now.

So, Lola had already heard a lot of good things about Pacific Coast Academy, although she would still have preferred Hollywood School For The Professional Performance Arts, anyways. But as she was hell bent on earning her first Oscar as soon as can be, she decided to fool her new school mates with her acting practice.

* * *

**11:3:2 Vanessa Tayler**

Not all female freshmen that were new here at Pacific Coast Academy were aspiring Hollywood stars, but they had got a variety of expectations and dreams.

**Vanessa Tayler**[11:6] had just graduatred from aforementioned Rocky Road Middle School in New Jersey, and there was probably not much of a reason for her to make the trip across the continent. Her main hobby was volleyball, but she also liked the prospects of making it into the cheerleading squad, which was a lot easier at Pacific Coast Academy due to the low amount of girls.

Granted, this year, the number of female students had increased a lot, but they were still outnumbered. For that reason, Pacific Coast Academy was still advertising for its cheerleading team.

Vanessa was now up to both cheerleading and volleyball. Unlike Dana, who had felt the need to choose, she saw no problem with training for both activities. She was looking forward to her new dormitory room in Brenner Hall as well. But for that avail, she needed to check in with the boarding office. This year, the organisation of the first day for students was a lot better, but was it good enough?

* * *

**11:3:3 Natasha Misa**

Although Rocky Road was a little sleepy hollow far away from California, there had been several students interested in switching to Pacific Coast Academy.

This trend had been down to news spread by fellow student Adelaide Singer, who — inspite of never having been on our campus — was totally keen on Wendy's school. Indeed, Addie was thinking about getting her parents to send her over to this illustrious school. But she would not want to leave without her two best friends, **Geena Fabiano** and **Zachariah Carter Schwartz**.

[11:7][11:8] was definitely nnot a friend of Adelaide, but rather treated her like dirt. She was an arrogant cheerleader girl, and she had incited Vanessa Tayler to join her to Pacific Coast Academy for a cheerleader scholarship. Apparently, both of them got accepted.

Natasha was now barely content with being just one of a group of cheerleaders, but she wanted to be the number one at any cost, and she wanted the privilege to flirt with the quarterback of the football team any time.

* * *

**11:3:4 Maria Misa**

Natasha had got a monozygotic twin sister who was following her from Rocky Road to Pacific Coast Academy: **Maria Misa**.[11:9]

Unlike her arrogant sister, Maria was fairly kind and calm. Her interest was that of becoming a great visual artists, especially a painter. She liked especially drawing portraits of othe rpeople, usually friends and family members.

* * *

**11:3:5 Evelyn Kwong**

You have already encountered Evelyn Kwong, the typical aggressive nerd girl of partly Chinese origin, as the dance partner for Wayne 'Firewire' Gilbert during last year's middle school ball. Under normal circumstances, she would have transferred to James K. Polk Middle School, because her new home was in Santa Clarita. But she had insisted in going to Pacific Coast Academy, because she really liked Wayne Gilbert for being a cool nerd, or so she saw it.

Evelyn dreamed of being a scientist like Quinn, but not one with a laboratory and so on, but one with many books and with an oldfashioned computer without multimedia junk that had been popularised by Pear and uits close competitors. This underlines that Evelyn was more of a theoretician and a statistician than an a modern researcher.

* * *

**11:4 Boarding Management**

* * *

**11:4:1 Miss Burvich**

The responsible employee for assigning dormitory rooms was one **Miss Burvich**[11:10] — some aswfully grumpy spinster.

This was absolutely not an easy task, because there had been so many things to consider. It had been a lot easier during my life time at Pacific Coast Academy, when there were no girls, and the only thing the administration had to care about were the age of the boys.

But nowadays, only a computer was able to manage the complicated restrictions imposed by the recent developments. As you have guessed it, the necessarytechnology was provided by no other than Pear Electronics.

Unfortunately, shrimpling spinsters like Burvich were not exactly experts for handling modern technology the way they should have been able to in order to accomplish their job in a dutiful manner. And she did not understand that there was a bug in the system.

Quinn Pensky would have been able to correct the system, making it work properly. But she had not been granted access to the source code by Pear Electronics due to their selfish motivations.

For that reason, Burvich was forced to put up with the crappy software, and the result was a bot chaotoc and arbitrary.

Another problem was the fact that Quinn had not been available in order to take care of the problems during the summer break.

Finally, the computer came up with some assignments:

Lola Martinez was chosen as a room mate for Quinn Pensky!

* * *

**11:4:2 Quinn's Room Mate**

Coco Wexler was the dormitory adviser for Brenner Hall. At least she was no longer responsible for the girls of the grades one through six, by whom she had been annoyed to no end during her first year at Pacific Coast Academy — especially by Wendy Gellar and Ashley Blake.

Zoë Brooks, Dana Cruz, and Nicole Bristow were once more stuffed into some room numbered _101_, albeit in Brenner Hall, a few blocks apart from their former residence in Butler Hall. They greeted Coco, and then they walked straight into their new dormitory room. Unfortunately they met some not so pleasant surprise:

Quinn Pensky, the girl next door, had just installed a two-way television system that allowed her to communicate with the inhabitants of _101_. She had used her own technology, but based somewhat off Pear TV systems.

Of course Zoey and her room mates would not have minded talking on and off to the girl next door.

But this systems could be switched on and off only from Quinn's end of the connection, and it was thus tantamount to a system of control and surveillance, similar to that of high security prisons.

Dana Cruz was especially upset, and she pondered beating the living hell out of the geek princess from Seattle. She would have been held back by Zoë Brooks, though.

But Quinn was not willing to change anything, and she was looking forward to using her room as a laboratory for the whole pending academic year. But she was so totally wrong, for in this moment, her room door went open, and some dark goth girl walked in.

This was no other than Lola Martinez, one of the aforelisted new girls at Pacific Coast Academy. She had decided to wear some dark outfit in order to fool her new class mates into being something she was not. She had beenn late, as there had been kept up by the chaoyoc situation in the office of Miss Burvich.

Dana Cruz, Nicole Bristow, and Zoë Brooks were able to watch that constellation, and they grinned cheerfully, because they thought taht Quinn had definitely had that coming.

Consternated Quinn Pensky could not bear the mischievous grimaces of the girls next door, and thus she shut down the connection before dealing on her own with the new and totally unpleasant room mate.

Lola started darkening the room on site. She ignored Quinn's laboratory tools, which had always disturbed any person with poor understanding of her scientific activities, such as Zoë Brooks during her second week at Pacific Coast Academy. She pretended to start talking to the dead.

But was Quinn really up to believing in Lola's ridiculous masquerade? She asked the Latina where she was from.

Lola claimed that she had been a student at a similarly organised boarding school in Upstate New York, but that she had been expelled from there after an accident in which a teacher got pushed downstairs. She was — according to her own statement — not even allowed to talk about it.

Quinn Pensky choked hard, because the way Lola had talked about pushing someone downstairs had reminded her of some onslaught she had witnessed during the past, and about which she was not willing to talk. I will talk about that incident a little later down the road. But now Quinn started to panic, because she feared that she had been caught by her own past.

**_"_**  
Is Lola a spy sent forward by the victim in order to blackmail me — or maybe just in order to make me nervous?

Hey, maybe _Lola_ is not really her name, anyways.

But I don't buy that she is a goth girl. She is way too optimistic and realistic for one. Proper goth girls are pessimists and idealists.

**_"_**

By the way, _Lola Martinez_ was not her usual name, at least not until now. The diva had preferred to go by the name _Tori Vega_.

Quinn looked aghast, and she remembered that her cousin **Camille Roberts** had once tried to fool other people into believing that she was an escaped criminal.

Camille looked a lot like Quinn, anyways, and she had once made others believe that she was Quinn, well, she would have achieved in doing so, had she not accidentally made a scientific mistake.

Quinn supposed now correvtly that Lola was an actress as well. She decided to keep her thought for herself, and she made Lola believe that she was buying her story.

**_"_**  
Maybe she has been sent forward by my enemies in order to make me nervous?

I am propably supposed to admit to having witnessed the terror, just as the murderer from Edgar Allan Poe's _Telltale Heart_.

Camille once performed in a play based on that short story, and she was a hell of convincing.

**_"_**

She knew that she had to be extremely careful, for Lola was possibly dangerous, although she was not a necromancer or goth freak at all. Now she decided to call it a day, and to postpone any further decision until the next days.

* * *

**11:5 Entertainment Factory**

Logan Reese had spent most of his summer break working on his own beauty, and with his favourite occupation, videlicet wasting his father's money. And now he had bought a complete high fidelity station, with several overpowered boom boxes and a video game station. He was too lazy to carry the equipment across the campus, and thus he paid Dustin Brooks — without the approval of his elder sister — for doing so.

Finally, the entertainment centre was established and up for power usage.

Logan was still unable to do all that on his own, and so he had once more paid Wayne 'Fire Wire' Gilbert for the job of fixing the power supplies, and for optimising the accoustics.

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret did not really have the time for playing with Logan's new toys. They had to learn for an upcoming test in geography: the states of the US and their capitals. After a few of those, such as Alabama and Tennessee, Chase and Michael saw themselves forced to recede form their project. It was clear that any attempt of learning in such an environment made absolutely no sense.

And the hallway was filling more and more with students ready to kill their brains by getting themselves exposed to terrible music, such as records of Drake Parker's last concert in San Diego.

The video games deployed by Logan Reese were fairly new, and they ran especially on the so-called **Game Sphere**,[11:11] the most modern video game station from the state of Washington.

There had been quite a few disputes between Logan Reese and Wayne Gilbert with respect to the games to be purchased for this power device.

The nerd guy would have preferred wonderful role playing games of the good old school, based on the same themes as his tabletop role playing games and thefantasy hero cartoons he and his pals Neil Wosniacki and Andrew Bernstein loved to read.

But Logan Reese was more into brute real time action games with lots of guts and gore.

As a feeble copmpromise, they had finally agreed on some lame arcade style games that came by default with the game sphere. But this did not mean that they would have to stick with those during the following months.

Dustin Brooks was a total fan of arcades, and he had already beaten all the high scores at his uncle Glazer's video game box. Now he was absol;utely keen onb playing Logan's new game, and he was granted because he had helped a lot establishing the game sphere in the first place.

Needless to say, Zoë Brooks would not have been keen on hearing about her brother's latest addiction. But she was now too far away across the campus. In addition, the noise protruding from **Maxwell Hall**,[11:12] would have prevented the Mary Sue from hearing any news.

Logan Reese was no good in mathematics, and thus he was unable to estimate how much electricity his whole entertainment centre was about to swallow. He had been warned previously by Wayne Gilbert, who had even precalculated these possibilities right in front of the jerk's eyes. But Logan had simply paid Wayne twenty bucks more in order to cease his incomprehensible nerd talk about costs and capacities.

Dustin was getting fairly well along with the new system, and he fought his way bravely through a series of waves of hostile attackers, claiming level after level. Upon each progress, he squaled like a wounded fury for extreme excitement. He went closer and closer to the ultimate level when the power overthrow took its toll:

All of a sudden, the whole lounge and hallways went dark, as a power failure had occurred. This did not just effect Maxwell Hall, but about all of the campus power supplies had broken down.

The boom boxes had gone silent, but this did not put an end to the social noise — quite the contrary: Boys and girls alike started to panic due to the sudden darkness.

* * *

**11:6 Camping Adventure**

* * *

**11:6:1 Borrowing Tents**

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret had finally had enough of the tormenting noise. They decided to leave the dormitory hall, and to spend their night somewhere out on the campus. Of coure this was strictly not legal, but sudent drop days were way too chaotic. Nobody was able to control anything on the wide campus. Of course tents did not grow on trees on the campus.

As neither Chase nor Michael had got any on their own, they needed to borrow some. Fortunately, they knew that Coco Wexler was often enough going on camping trips, for whatever reason. She had already been a responsible adult for camping trips of middle school kids, although she was a mere catastrophe as an overseer.[11:13] Fortunately, Chase and Michael did not really need Coco, but only her camping equipment, and they were lucky:

Coco was already in her apartment, and she was ready to lend her tents and other accessories needed for a night out on the campus unto the refugees from Logan's accoustic hell.

Unfortunately, the tents were already fairly weatherbeaten, and dirty to boot. One of them was already inhabited by some dune bug, but the unwary guys did not know that.

* * *

**11:6:2 In The Tents**

It was not easy for them to find a place for the tents. Their first guess had been that of going to the sandy beach, but they had totally forgotten that it was close to impossible to fix a metal hook in the weak sand.

Only after walking around for several minutes they were able to find a nice place that was still out of the reach of the sound from Logan's high fidelity centre.

Each of them was now ready to sleep in his chosen tent.

All of a sudden, Michael noticed the bug, and he started squaling like the unltimate idiot that he was on and off.

Chase wondered what was going on, and upon understanding the reason, he suggested Michael to squish the bug.

But the jazz flautist was not willing to do so, because the bug might have a family, and so on, and stuff.

Finally, Michael left his tent in order to move in with Chase.

Needless to say, the tent was very small and not really suited for two teenagers.

But now they were forced to put up with the situation, although this was going to be a painful night: Both guys would punch and kick each other over and over again.

This was definitely not a good environment for learning for the upcoming test in geography, either.

And now it was the moment when the lights on the campus broke down.

Granted, Chase and Michael had got their electric torches, but they did not make any good use of them, due to incessant trembling and kicking.

* * *

**11:6:3 Looking For Dustin**

Dana had gone out in order to meet a few of her cheerleader friends and go for a snack and a drink.

Zoë Brooks and Nicole Bristow had been sitting in their room, busily chatting about their adventures from the last summer break, when the lights went out due to the aforementioned power failure.

Fortunately, Zoey had got a little electric torch in her luggage, and she had already placed it onto their common table. Her mobile telephone started ringing, and so she picked it up.

Dustin was on the other end, and he squealed for agony. He complained about the powerfailure, especially because it had happened when he had been so close to beating the new high score.

Zoë Brooks wondered where her brother was now stuck.

Dustin sighed deeply. He had already left the building in order to make it back to his dormitory room. But he had lost his way, because he had only been in Maxwell Hall a few times before. He would surely have found his way home from Logan's old dormitory block, and he took a wrong turn because he was confused by all that.

Zoey was now desperate, as she needed to find her lost brother and to take him home. Thus she forced her ditzy room mate to follow her across the campus, armed with the light of an electric torch, and to call everywhere for Dustin. She would have to pay for this with making Nicole's homework for the next week.

Apparently, other students were a bit lost out on the campus as well.

Zoey took her cellular phone in order to call Chase and Michael for help, but she had to realise that the creepy guys were stuck together in a one man tent. But the Mary Sue insisted in the boys' support.

Finally, more and more electric torches were brought to the campus square, amd this allowed Dustin to find back to the fountain in the middle of the paved area.

Zoey hugged her lost little brother and guided him to his dormitory room, but she also expressed that she was not pleased by his recent actions.

Dustin moaned, but she kept his mouth shut. But this did not mean that he would not keep on playing action video games. He had even got plans for a big action game meeting with game sphere addicts from the whole county.

* * *

**11:7 Improving The Power Supplies**

The campus of Pacific Coast Academy had been provided with electricity from its very beginning, and the capacities had been augmented step by step duriong the following decades. Of course it was obvuous that there had not been as much need for highly efficient supplies during the first years of life at Pacific Coast Academy.

But the progress of modern electronics, propelled especially by companies like Pear Electronics, had increased the demands in a vehement manner: Pupils wanted to run their latest broadband devices, plasma screens, boom boxes … you name it.

This made the current power supplies largely inefficient and insuffcient on a day like this.

Quinn Pensky and Melinda Crenshaw were finally about to think about a solution. They wanted to make the campus autonomous with respect to power supplants, and definitely able to support Logan's high fidelity centre and even more. It would have been hardly possible for each of them on his own, but by a close collaboration, the two genius girls would possibly be able to achieve said goal during the current and next academic year. They already started to think about it, and they had contacted Cal Meacham in order to be provided with the necessary ingredients.

Of course, the school administration needed to be informed about any suggested change, and they would have to agree with that project.

Quinn hoped that she and Mindy would gain access to the science club's laboratory this way, once the board and Dean Rivers had given their consent for the project.

The major obstacle, besides technological problems, was of course the fact that the sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy, who were somehow connected with the current power providers, would not necessarily approve of any envisioned autonomy based on some students' hobby project.

* * *

**Chapter 12 Into The Fall**

* * *

**12:1 Gaudeamus Igitur**

At the beginning of each academic year, Dean Rivers used to greet the new students and to welcome the returning students back to the campus. Of course his words were purely hypocritical, as he had got better things to do than taking care of the students' concerns.

His speech was followed by a presentation of the school's choir and their instrumental backup.

There was a violoncellist: **Jessica Novicky**,[12:1] and a violinist: Nils Jacobsen.

The choir just consisted of a few freaks that just opened and closed their mouth to a taped tune. This only left the instrumental backup, as poor as it may have been, as the only real part of the performance.

During the last year, students had come to appreciate Megan Parker from San Diego and her oboe. This had been in particular the case after her participation in the basketball state championship and the middle school graduation ceremony.

Unfortunately, Megan's evil mother Audrey was of the stupid opinion that Megan was still too young for a boarding school, and she would need some more time to even think about it, inspite of all the good reports made by Wendy Gellar's mother.

But finally, Nils Jacobsen started fiddling like a true maestro. He was conducted by Mark Del Figgalo.

Michael Barret had tried hard to avoid participating in the little concert as a flautist, but he had been kicked into doing so by Dana Cruz.

The fake choir sang the popular students' song from the eighteenth century:

**_"_**  
Gaudeamus igitur  
Iuvenes Dum Sumus  
Gaudeamus igitur  
Iuvenes Dum Sumus  
Post iucundam iuventutem  
Post molestam senectutem  
Nos habebit humus.  
Nos habebit humus.

**_"_**

The song recommended the students to rejoice in their youth as long as it was still possible, for sooner or later, they would grow old and finally bite the dust for good.

To some extent, this was so true — at least for most students year who couldnot help but frolick in their naïvity, such as Logan Reese. Well, almost everyone was naïve enough tho believe that the choir was real. What else did they swallow qwithout a second thought?

But I had simply skipped the growing old oart, and I got swallowed by the soil while still being young, But we will see more of that later on.

Jacobsen continued fiddling like nobody's business. while Michael was too embarrassed for releasing even one single sound.

**_"_**  
Ubi sunt qui ante nos  
In mundo fuere?  
Ubi sunt qui ante nos  
In mundo fuere?  
Vadite Ad Superos  
Transite Ad Inferos  
Ubi iam fuere.

**_"_**

That was a ninteresting question: Where were those who had once been in this world? The usual answer was given also here: They had gone to heaven or hell! The audience is told to go and to look there for them.

But what did those mentally impoverished mortals know … and how would they even want to figure?

Apparently, some of us restless souls were still here, at leats in our mind. Others had returned in a different shape, just in order to go through the same tribulations over and over again, until we learnt that they were really nothing to get attached to.

**_"_**  
Vivat academia  
Vivant professores  
Vivat academia  
Vivant professores  
Vivat membrum quodlibet  
Vivant membra quaælibet  
Semper sint in flore.

**_"_**

This stanza really sums up the hypocritically naïve academic mentally practised here at Pacific Coast Academy since its very foundation. It praises the school and the teachers, along with both the more and the less advanced students. They were all meant to flourish forever.

Yes, but what kind of flourishing was that? Letting yourself manipulate by sponsors with selfish interests?

**_"_**  
Vivat et res publica  
Et wui illam qui regit  
Vivat et res publica  
Et wui illam qui regit  
Vivat nostra civitas  
Mæcenatem caritas  
Qui nos hic protegit.

**_"_**

So, this praises the government and the city, along with the charity of the sponsors.

Needless to say, those were nowhere near of all levels obeyed to those who pay them most, and these included probably our sponsors.

Finally, the sound of hypocrisy had passed away, and the students were sent to their homeroom classes.

* * *

**12:2 Sleep Apnea**

As we had seen many times ovcer and over again, Quinn Pensky was strongly interested in the human nervous system, especially the grey zone and the transistion from awakeness and sleep.

After her failed experiments with Dustin Brooks — involving sleep withdrawal — and with Zoey's gang — involving the coconut-flavoured narcotic, she was more and more urged to experiment with herself. She had done so occasionally during the summer break, but without sufficient results.

In the frame of her research, Quin had experimented with substances that introduced some temporary sleep apnea, with symptoms commonly referred to as _snoring_.

During the summer break, nobody had noticed anything, as Quinn had slept almost always alone in a sound proof room, thence with nobody tio be bothered.

This apnea was not just an unwanted side effect: Quinn was convinced that it would help her to study herself while almost asleep.

This solitude was of course no longer the case upon her return to the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

Quinn had to share her room with Lola Martinez, who was of course little pleased to get to listen to the sounds of Quinn snoring all night long.

In addition, the walls of their dormitory room were thin enough to allow for bothering the girls next door with the sounds of apnea.

Dana Cruz would not be pleased when bothered by the sounds of aggressive snoring developed by the smart girl next door, at least not more than by the logorrhea of her room mate Nicole Bristow.

Nicole would have turned even more crazy, just as Lola.

Zoë Brooks was fairly tolerant, but this did not mean that she would have been able to bear it forever and one day. She had already turned suspicious upon those experiments involving Dustin and sleep withdrawal.

And there were many other girls on the same floor of the dormitory hall, or in the floors above or below, who would have wondered about the noise and started making fun of the geek girl for whatever reason.

On the other hand, Quinn's boyfriend Mark Del Figgalo would have been unlikely to object, because the dork used to sleep like a charm. But this was of course of little help, as Mark was still accomodated in a different dormitory block.

* * *

**12:3 Time Capsule**

* * *

**12:3:1 The Class Project**

David Bender had gathered his homeroom class for the second week of the new academic year.

These were the classes of Zoë Brooks, Nicole Bristow, Michael Barret, Chase Matthews, and Lola Martinez.

Some of the kids were reading an old yearbook of Pacific Coast Academy, from the times when Mr. Bender himself was still a student over here, which was already three decades after my untimely departure from the realms of flesh and bone.

The teacher had apparently been a cheerleader back then, and he wore some spectacles that had been probably fairly fashionable back then, but were considered uncomely by the teenagers of the day.

The kids started to wonder what following generations of Pacific Coast Academy students would think about them.

Thence Bender had got a great idea: He started a class project involving a time capsule.

The kids would be forced to contribute something significant for their current life at Pacific Coast Academy.

A few decades later, children from the next generation of Pacific Coast Academy students would accidentally find the capsule and thus learn a lot about the life at this wonderful boarding school in the first decade of the third millennium.

Most of the kids in Bender's class were enthusiastic about this, but there was one exception:

Lola Martinez was of a completely different opinion. She would have preferred a dinner with **Orlando Bloom**, _her favourite adult actor and example to live up to_. And, in addition, she did not see any trace of a sense in this project. In twenty years, everyone would know her anyways as a multiply Oscar-awardaded Hollywood superstar, and her movies, along with illustrated interviews in documentation shows and colourful tabloid papers, would witness for her glorious past.

Unfortunately, David Bender was little inclined towards accepting this as a reason for Lola to refrain from participating in the project.

But this did not mean that the hot Hollywood starlet was ready to accept the verdict. She would have to do what needed to be done in order to avoid the class project, using her supreme acting skills.

* * *

**12:4 Back To The Past**

There had been no such thing as a time capsule project during my life at Pacific Coast Academy, but now I wondered what we would have inserted into such a box, and what the students of Zoë's time would have made of it.

Yes, this was of course a very hypothetical question.

Indeed, we the students of Pacific Coast Academy during the early times of the cold war had asked us questions like that.

And since my premature removal from the face of this earth, I had wondered whether the students of the generation in vigor would ever want to know what had happened on the campus back then.

Inspite of grisly legends, non e of the kids had ever dared to ask what life at Pacific Coast Academy had really been like during the fifties, though.

As you have probably already guessed, I had not exactly been a supporter of the same kind of politics as the Bradfords, and thus I had to be careful.

There had been long lists of _public enemies number one_ abounding on the campus.

So what would I have left in a time capsule — had I ever had the occasion to hide one — in order to show how our life had been?

This is a tough call, for I did not want it to be too obvious, allowing everyone to read it and spread it like wild fire. I had not been able to know which sort of regime was in vigour at the time of the discovery and opening of the time capsule.

In other words, I would have tried to encrypt the message in some way. Of course this was not really easy, as someone was supposed to be able to make sense of it, anyways. Of course modern computer freaks like Quinn Pensky and Wayne Gilbert would have laughed about our most immature attempts.

* * *

**12:4:1 The Students' Contributions**

* * *

**12:4:1:1 Zoë Brooks**

But now let us see what Bender's students were up to letting future generations of Pacific Coast Academy kids know about their own times and life on this campus.

Zoë Brooks was hell bent on making a movie about her life on the campus, especially including her friends. Unfortunately, she was still not skilled in using a web cam appropriately.

During aforementioned Jet-X project, Quinn Pensky had been forced to use the cam in order to shoot the publicity clip for Zoey, Nicole, and Dana. Even worse, when the girls had split up due to a variety of escalating arguments, Quinn had to shoot three clips: one for Dana, one for Zoey, and one for Nicole.

But today, Quinn was too busy, and she was still upset about having wasted her time on stupid publicities for a new scooter. "If I want a scooter, I build one from scratch, and it would rock the streets of Los Angeles County like nobody's business."

Zoey was now left alone with the technological aspects of her project, and — of course — she used the latest Pear products in order to get her work done. She knew that those pear cams were supposed to be the easiest to use on the current market, and that this judgment was unchallenged, yet she did not really feel comfortable when doing so, as she sensed that she weas just a little ratchet in the huge marketing machinery of this dominator of the electronics business, although she had always dreamed of being unique and generally adored.

* * *

**12:4:1:2 Logan's Picture**

Being an utter jerk, Logan was convinced of being the gods' gift to the girls of this world. At least he would have thought like this if he had actually believed in any gods or so besides himself.

Thus it was not hard for him to find an appropriate idea for a contribution to the time capsula: A picture of himself, emphasising his utter hotness.

He insisted especially in showing the shrub in his armpits. "Bushy armpits are hot and sexy. Bushy skullcaps are freaky and uncomely." He said the latter in order to insult Chase — of course. He was also keen on his so-called sixpacks.

Finally, Logan added a dedication to the picture of his choise, declaring explicitly that the picture was a gift for the hot girls of the future.

* * *

**12:4:1:3 Chase's And Michael's Song**

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret had got completely different plans. They were up to writing a little song about their time at Pacific Coast Academy.

As aforementioned, Chase was a gifted poet who was also somewhat able to play the guitar — of course nowhere near to the level of Drake Parker, the ultimate teenage rock idol. He also thought about the lyrics of Drake's texts, amnd he had been told that those had been written by one Adelaide Singer from the northeastern states. Chase feared to be never able to reach her level.

Michael was a gifted composer of soul and blues rock, and he triued to use his transversally held flute in order to demonstrate his half-baked compositions. He was also thinking about Drake's latest tunes and their composer, Wendy Gellar, in whom he saw a dangerous competitor. This made him more and more nervous, to the degree of being ready to give up on writing tunes altogether. What was most depressing for Michael was the fact that Wendy was younger by almost four years.

But the greatest obstacle for Chase's work was the fact that he did not get his feelings for Zoë Brooks out of his mushy head. He would have written a song containing the word _Zoey_ thrice a line.

Michael tried hard to dissuade him from that, but was he really successful? Hell no!

The greatest obstacle for Chase was his knowledge about Zoe's impending contribution:

**_"_**  
Zoë Brooks will say a few words about each of her friends. What will she say about me?

What shall I do?

If she is madly in love with me, I better fess up as well.

If she just accepts me as sort of a pal, I better give up on my hopes.

**_"_**

Chase knew that he would not get any sleep until he had figured what Zoey said about him in her clip.

* * *

**12:4:1:4 Nicole's Outfit**

Nicole Bristow was one of the most shallow persons at Pacific Coast Academy. So unlike everyon e else who at least tried to use his or her contribution to the time capsule in order to say something about his or her own personality, and possibly also of his or her friends, Nicole's solution was totally simple:

Her favourite cosmetic set and tank top would end up in the time capsule.

While this was totally easy, Nicole was more concerned about the noises protruding from Quinn's dormitory …

And Quinn had already tried hanging from a wall, along with other traditional self-cure tricks. But she had nott yet been successful. She wanted the apnea, but she did not want to upset her neighbours and Lola with the sounds of snoring.

* * *

**12:4:1:5 Dana's Smithereens**

Dana Cruz was totally keen on her martial skills,a nd thus it was not much of a surprise that she was ready to proudly display the results of her actions in the time capsule.

A pile of bricks, marble slabs, and brass plates that she had obliterated violently with her mere hands, elbows, feet, and her skull joined the collection of memories of her times at Pacific Coast Academy.

At the same time, Dana Cruz thought aloud about several ways to break Quinn Pensky's skull into smithereens in order to prevent her from snoring anymore.

Nobody in Brenner Hall was more bothered by the noise caused by the geek girl's sleep apnea more than Dana and some of the other cheerleader girls, such as Tasha Misa and **Miranda Franklin**,[12:2] a junior that had arrived during the previoous academic year from San Diego.

* * *

**12:4:1:6 Lola's Poor Excuse**

Lola refused still to contribute anything, and instead of a contribution, she offered a foul excuse. According to her statements, she would have been up to sacrificing a memory of her deceased grandmother, a valuable amulet, but she was unable to doing so, because it was the last visible link with her alike-looking grandma.

Bender was impressed, for he feared that Lola would collapse when having to talk any longer about her dead grandmother. He sighed deeply and granded her a straight A for the whole project, as he acknowledged that she had invested quite a few efforts.

* * *

**12:4:2 Into The Mud**

The time capsule was finally hidden in the soil not far from the campus square.

Of course there was no way to foretell when it would be unearthed again.

Bender spoke about twenty years in the future, but that was only due to the fact that the students had studied a yearbook aged twenty years when he suggested the project with the time capsule.

Logan taunted Chase endlessly about this secret that the busjy dweeb would never come to know about, only after two whole decades when everything was too late, anyways, and when Zoey was already married to someone who was not a bush-haired loser.

Night had fallen, and Chase's uncertainy and doubt were about to rise like a full moon. The bushy dork saw only one chance to get hold of the information that meant the small margin between life and death for him: "What does Zoey Brooks really think about me?"

Michael had already tried several times to tell Chase to fess up to the blond Mary Sue in a honest, and then she would let him know what she thought about him.

But Chase Matthews was still deaf on this ear.

The only way for him to reveal the nagging secret truth was that of unearthing the time capsule. Of course he would not be able to dig the soil and then to open and search through the capsule all on his own. In addition, he would have to hide the container again in order to be able to pretend that nothing had really happened.

Michael was definitely reluctant.

But Chase insisted that friends would do things like these for friends.

Logan was not around, because he was trying out for the football team. This would not be easy for him, because he was not contet with some arbitrary position in the team, he wanted to be in an important position.

It was not clear when the trials would be completed, but Chase had to hurry up in order to prevent the possibility that Logan would return from practice, notice his pals' absence, and then look for them and catch then in flagrante delicto out on the campus.

Michael finally gave in, and he followed Chase out into a rainy night.

Yes, some prejudice said that there was no such thing as rain in southern California California, but there were exceptions, and when this happened, it diod not just rain, but it poured down like a catarct.

The weather reporter had been aforementioned Walter Nichols from San Diego, the goofy father of Joshua Nichols. He had failed utterly in predicting the weather for this night, as she had announced a lot of sunny days for the whole week instead.

And Chase had fallen for the wrong weather forecast.

Michael grunted: "We should have better listened to Windchill."

**Bruce Windchill**[12:3] was the greatest competitor of Walter Nichols, snd the best styled weather reporter of the Pacific coast.

The guys needed some tools in order to dig the heavy soil, and they needed to borrow them from the janitors' closet.

Finally, the dirty work was done, and some nicely wrapped DVD disappeared from the time capsule into the handbag of Chase Matthews.

* * *

**12:4:3 Chase's Remorses**

Chase had started playing the DVD produced by his secret crush on his pear book, which included a cool DVD player. He was very excited when he pushed the red button.

In the movie, Zoë Brooks started talking, and she had mentioned a few of her friends already. She praised Nicole and so on.

Chase did not really care what Zoey said about other pupils. Indeed, he had tried to squeeze some words off her mouth during the last days, but she had only given him a few hints about their other friends, such as Logan whom she denounced as a jerk.

Now it was time for the segment dedicated to Chase.

But — all of a sudden — Chase stopped the display. He was struck by terrible remorses.

He woke up Michael again and asked him to confirm his bad feelings about the whole snooping action. Then he forced his pal once more to leave the bed and come with him out into the rainy and windy night, for the sole purpose of digging up the capsule, reopening it, reinserting the stolen DVD, and then putting the container firmly back into the soil, trying to hide any trace.

* * *

**12:4:4 Truce Of Lola And Quinn**

Quinn had been annoyed by Lola's fake activities. She had more and more figured that those were fakes, because she had even consulted a proper goth girl, **Jade West** from uptown Los Angeles.

Likewise, Lola had felt scared by Quinn's experiments, especially those involving her unbearable and incessant snoring.

In order to put an end to it, both of them had promised to stop thie activities.

Lola had to admit that she had just been acting, and Quinn needed to resume her experiments elsewhere.

Half a day later, Mindy Crenshaw and Doc Glazer Brooks would provide Quinn with a temportary cure, anyways, Unfortunately, this treatment ivolved a syringe with a long needle to be inserted into Quinn's hindside. But this would work like a charm.

Quinn told Lola also about her cousin Camille. "The two of you have got a lot in common. And she has often enough tried to fool me, but — even worse — fooling others into being me!"

Lola grinned. "That sounds like a lot of fun!" She was about to remove all the makeup thatbhad made her look like a seasoned goth girl.

Quinn sighed deeply. "It was not necessarily much fun for me."

Lola was done unmasking herself. "OK, no more words here in this room about sleep and death and similar scary stuff. I want to enjoy every moment I am awake … and alive … for this won't last for good." She chuckled, because she had thought about the aforementioned Latin song.

* * *

**12:5 Student Council Elections**

* * *

**12:5:1 Student Council**

Back during my life time here at Pacific Coast Academy, there had been no such thing as class presidents elected by the students, let alone a proper student council.

There had been speakers for the classes of students, but those had been assigned by the school administration and approved by Mr. Bradford. This way, those speakers were rather instruments of control and surveillance working as the tentacles of the school administration, the sponsors, and the overlord.

Only after the hippy generation, and as a reaction to the war of Vietnam, did some sort of democracy invade this campus. Finally, the offices of the class president, along with a bunch of deputies, did get established.

Those class presidents were to be elected early fall each year. In the case of the high school, the presidents were inaugurated solemnly into their annual office upon the beginning of the homecoming event.

The elections followed roughly the following kind of schedule:

First, upon the announce of the dean, students were encouraged to suggest fellow students of their grade for the office.

Each postulance needed thereupon to be supported by some other student.

Then the students of each grade cast secret votes that were to bve counted by some committee determined by the executive chairman of the school's board.

Finally, the dean was supposed to announce the results upon the opening of homecomimg, although they had been usully already in office for up to two a few weeks.

* * *

**12:5:2 Announce And Canditates**

Until the second to last academic year, Pacific Coast Academy had been boys-only, and thus the whole student council had existed exclusively of boys.

And during tyhe first year of coeducation, girls had not only been a vats minority, they had also been still completely unknown, which means that they were still busy in building up their popularity and social circles. They had not even dared to run for the office of a class president or its deputies, barring one potential treasurer in the lower grades.

As a result, all members of the student council had been male.

This year, girls were still a minority, but they were coming closer. In addition, those girls that were already in their second year had certainly built up some renopwn already, and they were often in the centre of a huge circle of friends.

Zoë Brooks was definitely one of those girls which had made it ointo the centre of the attention of her class mates. And she was thus the first girl to be suggested as a class president for the high school freshmen.

Little wonder, the person to suggest her was no other than her secret loverboy Chase Matthews.

Nicole Bristow did not hesitate for a moment, and she seconded her best friend's postulancy. This way, she hoped to become automatically something like Zoey's secretary and thus improve her renown among the cute guys on the — spoken honestly — the ditzy bimbo would have been a disgrace and a disaster for any office require some responsibility.

Zoey sighed deeply, as she was a bit too humble for running for the office. But she got back at Chase by suggesting him in turn. On the other hand, the Mary Sue was aware that running successfully for the student council and performing some great work would have been an impressive addition to her future college applications. Likewise, she did not mind her big picture in the school's yearbook. This way, she would have sent home a message to those students at her former middle school who had refused to acknowledge her superiority, such as some **Katie Baggerman**,[12:4] a girl that had once dared to call Zoë uncomely and appalling.

Chase was of course not really willing to run against his crush. But he was not in a position of turning it down.

**Malissa**,[12:5] a freshman girl with a little crush on Chase, seconded the postulancy of the bushy dweeb. She was little known among her fellow students, and indeed she was a fake. Just like aforementioned Courtney Simmons, she had been sent forth by the board of Northridge in order to snoop on PCA. She had chosen Chase Matthews as her toy, just as Mark Del Figgalo had been Courtney's involuntary right hand. After the elections, she would simply disappear from the face of Pacific Coast Academy and get awarded by her bosses.

Chase would have expected Michael to support him, and he was now a bit disappointed that someone else — and hitherto completely unknown to him — had done it.

Logan Reese sighed deeply. The unruly and most disgusting jerk did not want to have a female class president, and thus he was up to supporting the canditature of his room mate with all imaginable unfair means, especially with bribery, his main weapon since his first arrival on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

In Logan's eyes, his room mate Chase was someone easy for him to manipulate and to corrupt, while this was impossible with a girl with a strong will such as Zoey Brooks.

* * *

**12:5:3 Bought Class Presidents**

This leads me to continuing my general observation about the student council.

Since the start of free elections of a student council by — as it shoul be — the students of Pacific Coast Academy, the influence of the sponsors seemed to have diminished. But this was correct in theory only.

There was no way the mighty sponsors would have given up their direct influence on the students if they had not left open quite a few secret loopholes and backdoors in order to ensure that their interests would prevail in the end. Thus the move from board-assigned class presidents to those voted by the students themselves was nothing more than a beguiling sign of good will, in a time when politicians encouraged and requested the eduacations of students for a live as responsible citizens in a democratic society.

Corruption, pressure, and bribery had always been daily business at Pacific Coast Academy, including also the student councils.

* * *

**12:5:4 Zoey Resigns**

Chase told Zoey that he wanted to step back from his posyulancy, because she would have been the much better president.

At first glance, Zoë Brooks turned angry, and she acused Chase of being nothing but a fool. "Do you really think I need you to withdraw in order to be able to win?"

Chase stammered, but he did not find a way to convince Zoey.

"I better prepare my speech for the council," announced Zoey before walking away, filled with disgust by Chase's suggestion.

Chase shrugged helplessly with his shoulders. He was now — correct;y — afraid that Logan would bribe students in order to prevent that a girl got elected.

But then Zoey had to remember the stupid situation at last year's graduation day and her valedictorian's speech. She saw that her problems would return again, as it would be inevitable to persuade as many pupils as possible into voting for her, even those of whose motivations she had always been suspicious. Likewise, she would have to negotiate frequently with the school's administration, the board, and the alumni. Her experiences as a valedictorian had taught her that this was connected with more flattering and hypocrisy, and this was nothing she was fond of. And this would only work by lying to many pupils and feigning to be something that she was not. A few steps later, Zoë Brooks stood in the wide middle of the campus square, only a few steps from the big fountain.

Her choice was clear: The freshmen would have to look for another class president.

* * *

**12:5:5 The Last Man To Stand**

Upon Zoey's withdrawal, Chase had no longer seen a reason to refrain from doing the same.

Did this mean that there was no canditate left?

Well, there had been freshmen in homeroom classes other than that of Bender, and those had established their own canditate.

For some reasons, everyone had dropped out after a few days, leaving finally but one pupil to remain in the business: Mark Del Figgalo!

Only Quinn and a few other canditates would vote for him, but this was certainly enough if there were no alternatives left.

* * *

**12:5:6 Other Class Presidents**

The freeshmen were of course not the only pupils to vote for a class president.

Mindy Crenshaw had successfully applied for the president's crown among the juniors. She wanted to do this in order to make Joshua Nichols pay for sticking up for his step brother Drake over and over again. She was thus elected the first female class president at Pacific Coast Academy.

Dustin Brooks was in a stinky mood, because he had lost his elections against Ashley Blake. Well, at least he had lost to a movie star, and not to a nobody like Mark Del Figgalo. And now he was running to his big sister in order to look for comfort. But he would soon wish once more that Zoey had not been a fellow stingray at all …

* * *

**Chapter 13 Perverse Seductress**

* * *

**13:1 Samantha Puckett**

* * *

**13:1:1 The Evil Girl From Seattle**

We have already talked about a few new students that had arrived at Pacific Coast Academy for the first time at the very beginning of the academic year.

This was of course the normal case, but under some very rare circumstances, the portals of this elitarian boarding school were opened even during a running academic term.

Among them, there was one **Samantha Puckett**[13:1] from Seattle — the same city as Quinn Pensky.

And this was indeed not just an accident, but there was a close connection between the geek queen and the new girl from the same city.

Quinn Pensky, inspite of being just a high school girl, was kind of the family medic of the Puckett clan. And she was also the driving force behind Samantha's move.

Basically, the Pucketts were a clan of organised criminals of all kinds: murderers, blackmailers, burglars, money counterfeiters, and similar deeds upsetting the honest citizens of Seattle.

Sam was about to follow that firmly established family tradition. She had already committed several attempted onslaughts upon various people, such as her former boyfriend **Franck Murquin**[13:2] or her pageant rival **Leanne Carter**.[13:3] She was just lucky that there had been no witness for her crimes. She had pushed Franck off some branch of a high tree that — conveniently — was still full of green leaves, hiding her most grisly deed. And at the age of nine, she had participated in the Seattle beauty pageant, where she had lost to said Leanne. And she had thereupon pushed that marvellous and fascinating person downstairs. She had been banned from further contests like that for several years by the judges.

But Leanne — a firm believer in _turning the other cheek_ — had denied Sam's guilt when queried by the local police.

As you have probably guessed, Samantha's vicious onslaught on Leanne Carter had been the aforementioned violent event witnessed by Quinn Pensky. But Lola had not been sent forth by Leanne in order to make Quinn nervous and fess up.

Samantha's father had never been any good for the family, he had left them down before Sam had been able to talk or to walk, or that was what Sam had either been told or made everyone believe. In the end, it matters little, doesn't it?

Her equally criminal uncle **Carmine Puckett**[13:4] was the only person able to tell Sam about her dad, and that was not much, because he seemed to try to hide a lot from her. He was apparently the living head of the Puckett clan, and one person for young Samantha to look up to.

Samantha's mother was the typical woman without any trace of morals or taste whatsoever.

This was even too much for Sam to bear, and she was thu hardly ever at home.

In addition, the evil mother even neglected feeding her daughter or providing her with clothes that were not already torn and tattered from usage by several previous generations of Pucketts.

Little wonder, the child care office of the state of Washington had been seriously concerned, thinking that there was hardly some reasonable future on store for Samantha if she stayed in the circle of her mother. As a last attempt in order to prevent her from an otherwise inevitable career in a youth prison was now probably that of sending her to a boarding school far away from the impact of her family, and more precisely Pacific Coast Academy.

Quinn Pensky had been the one to suggest the illustrious boarding school at the dreamy beach of Malibu in a long letter to **Theordore Franklin**, the responsible principle at her regular school: **Ridgeway**.

The only person in Seattle able to try to stop Samantha from sinking any deeper was **Carlotta Shay**, a fellow student at her old district school Ridgeway in downtown Seattle. As completely opposed to Samantha, Carly was a fundamentally good girl without Sam's obnoxious tendencies, but this girl of eleven years was still fairly feeble and easy to manipulate, and thus likely to succumb on the long run to her evil best friend's deteriorating influence. She happened to be the little sister of aforementioned Spencer Shay.

Upon Franklin's official request, the transfer of Samantha Puckett as a student of difficult background got approved by **Jerald Hayfer**,[13:5] the president of the movement for the integration of problematic pupils. He was also the husband of aforementioned Linda Hayer, the decadent teacher from Belleview.

The other kids at Ridgeway were not supposed to ever know about the new life of their former fellow pupil.

This was evil the case for Carlotta Shay, who was now forced to believe that Samantha had been put into youth prison.

Theodore Franklin would sooner or later tell Carlotta about Sam's actual destination, but for the time being, he was urged by Jerald Hayfer to refrain from informing her about these circumstances. It was by no means easy for him, as he knew that Carly was not a bad girl.

Any remaining contact would — according to the experiences m,ade by Jerald Hayfer during the last decades of this project — endangered the success of Samantha's integration.

Of course being known as a kid from a criminal family would have easily made her the target of prejudices at such an elitarian prep school.

In order to hide her hideous past and family connections from curious kids, the authorities from the state of Washington and Jerald Hayfer had supplied Samantha Puckett with a new yet fake identity for her new life at Pacific Coast Academy: **Trisha Kirby**. But — of course — a new name did not automatically make you a better human. The new name was chosen for aforementioned math teacher Omar Kirby, responsible connection teacher for the project of integrating students from difficult background into this renowned and elitarian boarding school.

But now it was up to Samantha Puckett alias Trisha Kirby to use her given chance, because she would hardly ever get granted a second opportunity in the case of spoiling this one.

* * *

**13:1:2 Cleaning Up After Samantha**

Quinn Pensky was not only very familiar with Samantha Puckett and her family, she was also interested in keeping Samantha's true past as secret as only possible.

Neither of them were keen on their past as a pageant girl, and they had promised to refrain from telling anyone about it.

In order to hide some of Samantha Puckett's most vicious crimes, Quinn Pensky had intervened and treated the miserable victims medically. This had already been the case after Samantha had pushed Leanne Carter downstairs — without the necessity of a surgery, though. Quinn had not been a deputy of someone like Glazer when that incident had occurred.

But these days, things had changed. Quinn Pensky's research in biotronics allowed her to solve the health problems of not only Leanne Carter, but also of Franck Murquin, by means of providing them with biomechatronic protheses. And under the auspices of Doc Glazer, she was even able to implant those devices correctly instead of just inventing and building them.

Neither Franck Murquin nor Leanne Carter — or their respective families — would ever want to intervene and request any firther form of punishment for the diabolic girl from downtown Seattle.

There had already been a few situations where Quinn had lied to her friends about Samantha alias Trisha, and there were even a lot more to come.

* * *

**13:1:3 Plastic Surgery**

Samantha's mother **Pamela Puckett** — or at least that's what she claimed to be — was already perversely old and shrimpling. In order to maintain the feeling of youth, she had to undergo a series of cosmetic surgeries, culminating in eye lasering.[13:6]

Quinn was now offering the necessary surgical interventions, down to Glazer's strange generosity. And there were so many things to do to the body of the queen of crimes in downtown Seattle.

Most of the surgical activities took place in room 13 in **Come On Inn**[13:7], _a totally run down hotel in the downtown of Los Angeles, frequently a popular hangout for city tramps and pests_. Well, this was at least the usual meeting place of Quinn Pensky and Pamela Puckett, whenever the latter dared to be around in Los Angeles.

* * *

**13:2 Trisha Hits On Dustin**

Larry Granger was teaching science for fifth graders. This afternoon, he instructed them in the chemical laboratories of Pacific Coast Academy.

Samantha Puckett was already a sixth grader, but she had to do those laboratory classes along with the fifth graders, because there had been no equivalent classes at her former school, videlicet Ridgeway.

Students in the same class included Dustin Brooks and his friends Jacob Ross, Henry Nolston, and others.

There were of course strict security rules for the laboratory, and the teachers were responsible for teaching their pupils to heed them rigorously, and they were responsible for those who violated the rules.

Unfortunately, Granger was completely incompetent — both as a scientist and as a responsible adult. He decided to put Dustin Brooks in charge with the labortatory in his absence.

While Zoey's little brother was certainly extremely knowledgeable and caring for some guy of his age, he was legally much too young for such a task. Granger was thus acting like a complete fool, and he would later get fired by Dean Rivers upon Zoey's request for this criminal irresponsibility.

Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett was naturlly not all that much interested in chemical formulæ, but she loved explosions and toxic fumes spreading across a class room.

Henry was her laboratory partner, but he was totally overburdened by this task.

For that avail, Granger commanded Henry and Dustin to trade places.

Dustin sighed, and then he left his regular partner, videlicet Jack, behind, and he walked up to Samantha Puckett. He was warned by Henry: "She's evil!" Of course, he would have known that even without Henry's interventions: "She is exactly the kind of person about whom my sister has always warned me."

The unruly blonde did not waste any moment and started hitting perversely on Dustin Brooks. She forced him to look closer into her eyes, and she wrote her mobile telephone number onto his arm, persuading him into a date right after the end of the classes.

There was no doubt that Zoë Brooks would refrain rigorously from approving of Dustin's insane relationship with someone like Samantha Puckett, a girl with no sense for morals, and with laziness and gluttony as her most brilliant qualities.

Unfortunately, it was also to some not so small extent the fault of the blond Mary Sue. As you have seen earlier, Zoë had refused stubborbly to talk to Dustin about boys and girls stuff when he had asked her to.

Quinn had given Dustin some informations instead, but those were only of technical nature, and it had nothing to do with feelings, responsibility, and similarly important things. Those aspects did matter little to a robot-like geek girl like Quinn, while Zoë Brooks would have been able to give Dustin the informations he had really needed.

* * *

**13:3 The Stench Of A Skunk**

* * *

**13:3:1 Stinky Surprise**

Michael Barret and Logan Reese were walking across the campus, and they had heard some noise from nearby shrubs. They had stupidly supposed these rumours to have been made by a kitten that was lost there and unable to find its way out. Alas, they were thoroughly mistaken. Unfortunately, they would only discover their mistake much too late.

The surprise hidden in the bushes was not a baby cat, but a skunk, and it was now squirting the contents of its glands right into the faces and at the clothers of those utterly careless and inappropriately curious intruders, making them scream in agony.

But the real trouble was still ahead of them, as it was extremely difficult to get rid of the penetrant stink caused by the black and white mustelid.

* * *

**13:3:2 Feeble Attempts**

Logan and Michael had not got a trace of a glue how to get rid of the stench. Well, they kinda had heard that tomato juice was powerful enough to remove the bad odor. But they were dumb enough to assume that drinking lots of it would do the trick.

Everyone sane would of course have known that it was necessary to bath in the squished lycopene bombs.

But Logan and Michael poured the red juice down their throats until it was impossible to fill their stomachs any further.

When Lola Martinez arrived in order to tell those dumb guys about their stupid misunderstanding, it was already way too late.

You might wonder where they had got the tomato juice from, anyways?

Really, Logan Reese had to bribe the cafeteria chef in order to achieve that.

Lola left the dumbfounded creeps behind, and she was up to telling her room mate Quinn about it. She was totally scared by the existence of a skunk on the campus. She feared running into the same and not being able to go to shootings for new movies during the next few years.

Even worse: the yellow press would not unlikely have given her a nick name such as _stink bomb_. And derogatory nick names could easily ruin your career in the modern entertainment business.

For that reason, she wanted to get rid of the stinky monster as soon as possible. But she had also heard about the weasel roaming the hallways, class rooms, and lockers of James K. Polk in Santa Clarita, and how even a skilled custodian like Gordy had not yet been able to catch or dispose with the intrusive beast.

The current custodian, **Ethan Banville**,[13:8] had been totally overburdened.

* * *

**13:3:3 A Stink Against A Stinky Monster**

Quinn sighed deeply when she heard Lola's report. She thought about two things to invent:

First, a chemical means for neutralising the disgusting stench cause dby the glands of the skunk was desperately needed.

Otherwise the clothes of Michael Barret and Logan Reese would keep on stinking up the campus. The same would have been valid for the garments of any further victim of the smelly mustelid.

Another invention that was vastly overdue was a means in order to scare or lure skunks away from the campus. Otherwise it was guaranteed that there would be more malodorous accidents in the near future.

Lola did not know which of those researches should be of higher priority, but she understood well that both of them were absolutely necessary. "Do you mean you may invent a stench that even scares skunks away?" She almost choked when imagining the possibility of such a terrible scent.

* * *

**13:3:4 Splitting Forces**

Working all alone, Quinn Pensky would not have been able to concentrate on more than one of those two equally important tasks.

But — fortunately — the presence of Melinda Crenshaw had changed the situation drastically for over half a year now.

Mindy offered to take over the task of developping a means in order to remove the stench from contaminated clothes, and of course from the wretched bodies of the victims of an unpleasant encounter with a skunk.

Quinn was thus left with the other job. She was not allowed to perform the experiments in her dormitory room, though, and thus she worked out in the dunes.

* * *

**13:3:5 First Failure**

Quinn had already tried some dozen of formulæ … alas, all of them ended smelling worse for the nose of most humans than the stink caused by the skunk's glands.

So Lola Martinez, inspite of being a complete failure with respect to natural sciences, had been not too far away from the truth.

In any case, finding the ideal chemical for the envisioned job was not a triviual task.

* * *

**13:3:6 A Tune Against The Skunk**

But when Wendy Gellar heard about the efforts of the scientists, she came up immediately with a different idea:

Her best friend Megan Parker had been able to control ferocious puppies such as aforementioned Elvis with the sound of her oboe.

So Wendy Gellar simply suggested to do the same thing with the skunk.

Mindy Crenshaw gasped. "This sounds like an excellent idea!"

The two girls congratulated each other for the great plot.

Wendy started immediately contacting Megan via mobile telephone.

Megan Parker smiled. "Of course I may do that!"

* * *

**13:3:7 The Deodoriser**

Mindy Crenshaw's research was much more successful. She had been successfully able to analyse the molecular structure of the stinky essence squirted by a skunk upon its foes.

Quinn Pensky had already worked on a general deodoriser, but this one had got several disadvantages.

For example, the chemicals used as a solvent had been totally aggressive, and they would have destroyed contaminated fibres of cloth in less than an hour. And incorporating those substances would have caused even a lot of further damage.

But upon further tests, Mindy had been able to find a solvent with reduced aggressivity, suitable for the purpose of neutralising the skunk's stench. It could be safely added to your daily laundry.

For Chase and Michael, this was of course good news. They had been forced to skip several classes already because of their incredible scent. But had they also learned something from their idiotic mistake?

* * *

**13:4 Samantha Comes A Long Way**

* * *

**13:4:1 Zoey Is Consternated**

Zoë Brooks crossed the campus, along with Nicole and Dana. Then they found Dustin and his friends Jacob Ross and Maximilian Tebbe[13:9] sitting on some wall. They greeted the little bugger.

Dustin did not want his elder sister to know that he was dating bad Samantha Puckett alias Trisha Kirby.

But unfortunately, his — falsely so-called — friends backstabbed him in the most deprecable manner by mentioning Dustin's new girlfriend in his sister's prese, and then it was all too obvious for Zoey.

The blond Mary Sue had already heard several bad things about the new girl that had made it to Pacific Coast Academy only during late September. But Zoë Brooks did not know the full truth about the circumstances why Trisha was here. She would — by the way — only hear about her real name, videlicet _Samantha Puckett_, a few weeks later. She definitely did not know that Trisha was not just an excessively loose girl, but also a culprit in several cases of onslaughts upon the life and health of other children. For that reason, she did not see that Dustin was also in physical danger. But she did by no means underestimate the moral danger her little brother was exposed to, and she urged him to separate from the evil lass. "All girls will be after you and never let you in peace, if they know that yopu had such an older and experienced girlfriend." She had thought this as an admonition for her little brother.

This was unfortunatelt the worst thing she could have said in this moment.

For Dustin would have enjoyed immensly to have had as many girls as only possible hankering after him. As is plainly obvious, he had been spoiled completely by someone like Logan Reese in order to come even closely to seeing it this way.

Alas, Nicole and Dana both agreed that Zoey was interfering way too much with Dustin's life, and that his girlfriends were absolutely none of her business.

Now the Mary Sue even saw a conspiration in the reactions of her room mates, for otherwise, Dana Cruz and Nicole Bristow would never have agreed on anything within less than five hours, but rather have argued to the death. Zoë Brooks understood that her attempt of returning her thoroughly deviated little brother to the proper course had been totally in vain, and that he would never listen to her advice when it came down to girlfriends.

* * *

**13:4:2 Zoey Commands Chase**

Of course, Zoey Brooks was by absolutely no means ready to give up that soon on her quest of saving her baby brother from going to sink in some morass of moral decadence and perversity. She had learned that little boys were more likely to listen to bigger boys rather than to bigger girls, including their elder sister.

For that avail, Zoey's most obvious option was that of sending a male envoy in order to talk some sense into Dustin.

Chase Matthews, who had apparently been ready to do like everything for Zoey — at least during the last fifteen months or so — appeared to be a perfect choice for this task:

Dustin seemed to respect him to some degree — or so reasoned Zoë Brooks.

And now she tried to put him in charge with this mission.

But there was a little problem: Chase was convinced — like about every high school boy knowing about the Brooks siblings — that Zoey was patronising her brother way too much.

Zoey growled: "Hey, please! You know that I would do the same for you!"

Chase replied that he did not have a little brother, so she could not do that for him, whether she wanted or not.

Zoey grunted: "This isnt my fault!"

Of course it wasn't, but the comparison made no sense.

If Chase had had a little brother, the latter would certainly not have listened to and overprortective older girl like Zoë any more than to him. Maybe Chase should have said that he had not got a little sister.

But this would not have been Zoey's fault, either, so bear with it!

Finally, Chase gave him, and he promised unto Zoey to do everything possible in order to talk some serious business with Dustin. Unfortunately, Chase's attempt of talking any sort of sense whatsoever into the brother of his secret crush would be a plain catastrophe.

* * *

**13:4:3 Trisha Trades Dustin For Chase**

Now Zoey had changed her orders for Chase, and she forced him to talk some sense into Trishaa Kirby instead.

But from here, things went downhill even more, albeit in an unexpected sense.

Chase Matthews found Trisha at the campus fountain.

She collected coins from the water that other pupils had thrown into it, either because of mistaking it foolishly for a wishing well, or due to the related superstition that tossing small coins into a well would warrant some good luck. Of course she did not believe in that nonsensical stuff … unlike Chase Matthews.

The bushy dork was now trying to dissuade Trisha Kirby from dating Dustin Brooks. He emphasised that Zoey's baby brother was too young for her, and that she would be better off with an older boyfriend.

Trisha growled, "hey, I know hat you mean!" She remarked that Chase was a boy, and that he was a bit older, and so she concluded that Chase wanted her. She agreed wholeheartedly, and from now on, she would claim Chase as her new boyfriend.

Chase Matthews was consternated, as this was definitely not what he had wanted to say. He whad been talking about some hypothetical older boy, not about himself.

So, onlookers might take Trisha's reaction either as a dumb misunderstanding or as a creepy trick.

Did this make a difference?

Chase gave up. The only way for him to get away from having to date the extremely bad girl was that of admitting to his feelings for Zoey Brooks, but he was still too much of a coward for such an important confession.

Honestly spoken: Trisha Kirby was absolutely devoid of any kind of feelings for Chase. She just hated Zoë Brooks because that lass was such a Mary Sue, and she thought that she could hurt her most by dating all of her male friends, one by one. Seducing Chase Matthew was just the next step in her diabolic mission, whereas Michael Barret and Logan Reese would certainly have followed later on.

* * *

**13:4:4 Fits Of Jealousy**

The message about Chase and Trisha as a new couple started spreading like wildfire across the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

Dustin Brooks was absolutely not amused. "Chase has stolen my girlfriend! He will pay for this! Until the times of dystopia will he do this!" Of cpurse he should have been glad for having been freed from Trisha's corrupting bondage, but he was tstill not experienced enough to see it like this.

Was Chase scared by this threat? It was certainly a problem for him, but the tween boy's jealousy was nothing compare to the fact that he was now stuck with the problem of explaining Zoë Brooks what he had done. He iomagined that even if she had ever liked him, she would not do so any longer by now, and maybe never again. He was really afraid of Zoey's immediate reactions when reporting unto her about the results of his attempts of causing Trisha to trash Dustin.

Zoë was really consternated. "You and Trisha? Tell me that this is not true!" Of course she did not want to believe him these most distasteful news, but she saw no reason to doubt the facts as she knew them.

Chase stammered:

**_"_**  
She has got everything wrong.

I wanted her to date an older boy. But I forgot that I am an older boy, whereas Trisha figured that much!  
**_"_**

He shrugged helplessly, for he knew about Zoey's merciless style of judgment.

Zoey looked concerned, and for the first time, she showed some traces of jealousy because of Chase and Trisha.

Chase noticed this — only marginally, though. Yet he would notice — sooner or later — that it was possible to make Zoë Brooks jealous, and then he would try to abuse this strategy on purpose in order to win the heart of the blond Mary Sue.

But for the time being, Zoey and Chase came up with a plan in order to cancel Chase's relationship with Trisha.

The bushy dweeb would just have to claim convincingly that he and Zoey had already been dating for quite a few months. He hoped that he and Zoë would have to kiss in order to prove that they were an established couple, and that not only in front of the eyes of Trisha Kirby, but the whole campus filled with curious onlookers.

Unfortunately, they did not really think through their plot, and this way, they risked complete failure.

* * *

**13:4:5 Megan Strikes Again**

Megan Parker was now once again ready to enter the campus of Pacific Coast Academy for the sake of yet another mission that involved her skills with the oboe.

Wendy Gellar welcomed her best friend heartily with a powerful huggle.

Also Ashley Blake was here in order to greet her friend, but she did it in a much colder manner, as if she was accusing Megan of having neglected her.

Whatever, Wendy Gellar had tio tell Megan Parker about qquite a few things going on on the campus.

And this report included the ungholy relationship of Dustin brooks and Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett.

Megan Parker coughed. She had heard about Samantha from other sources already:

Aforementioned Carlotta Shay was nothing less than an alike looking cousin of Megan!

Granted, there had not been much of a contact between those branches of the family.

But Megan Parker had always been convinced of the fact that Samantha was no good for Carly, and that she had got an excessively bad influence on her own best friend's life in general. But Drake's little sister had been unable to protect her cousin. "Carly is deaf on that ear!" She sighed deeply. "Sam often applauds her for doing evil stuff, and then Carly feels better, anyways." Megan was sad to say that she had already almost given up on Carlotta.

**_"_**  
The school administration would have to expel Trisha, or Sam.

This will certainly happen if Zoë Brooks denounces her.

But then Sam will return to downtown Seattle and continue to steer Carly into the wrong direction.  
Alas, I don't want that the demon ruins the life of more kids here in California!  
**_"_**

She was a hell of proud of her home state, and she considered it vastly superior to any other region of the United States. But this did not prevent her from trying to save Carlotta Shay as well, as long as she could., Doing so would be better as long as Samantha Puckett was still located in southern California, rather than out of sight in the far north.

Dustin Brooks had listened carefully to Megan's sermon about the vices of his former girlfriend. He understood that it made absolutely no sense to hate Chase Matthews for lifting her off him.

And now itb was Megan's task to beguile the skunk into leaving the campus as soon as possible and to never return again. She panted heavily. "I will have to try to emulate panpipes with my oboe." But a divinely skilled master like Megan would ultimately succeed and persuade the skunk to leave the campus in peace.

* * *

**13:5 Zoey Spares Trisha**

* * *

**13:5:1 Dustin Rues The Day**

Dustin had found Zoë in the lounge of Brenner Hall, and he had started talking to her about the whole uncanny affair with the bad girl from Seattle. He was promising solemnly that he had understood that he had made a grave mistake by dating evil Trisha Kirby. "I don't hate Chase for stealing my girlfriend, and I regret everything severely."

Zoey nodded. "That's great, you are a good brother!" She smiled, although she did not stop fearing that Dustin would fall for other kinds of bad girl just a little later in his still too young life.

Dustin also told Zoey that it was better to keep Trisha under control at a school lie Pacific Coast Academy than letting her wreak uncontrolled havoc somewhere else.

Of course, Zoë Brooks would have loved to see Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett alias whatnot to get expelled from Pacific Coast Academy by the school's administration, and there was hardly much of a doubt that she had got enough proof in order to convince Dean Rivers.

But during the last fifteen months, she had learned thoroughly that this did not make much of a sense, for Samantha was nothing but a victim of the system.

Revenge was never a good way for Zoë to solve the problems with the other girls and the boys on the campus.

Sending Trisha off Pacific Coast Academy would only make her wind up somewhere else.

Zoey knew next to nothing about Ridgeway and downtown Seattle. But she knew that at other schools there were also lots of innocent kids of up to ten years, just like Dustin.

Then Samantha would have just pulled some other kid down into the quagmire of moral corruption and decay. Indeed, at Ridgeway, she would have perverted and degenerated her — falsely so-called — best friend Carly Shay to no end.

Zoey was better looking for a way for saving other kids from Trisha's evil impact. She knew that Trisha Kirby was interested in car races, especially those deadly stock cars, or maybe motorbikes. She remembered that Dana Cruz had worked as an intern at the junk yard of greasemonkey Joseph Braxly, and thus she had got the idea of sending the bad lass over there for a job. "Cracking crashed vehicles must be something she's definitely up to!"

* * *

**13:5:2 Breaking Trisha And Chase**

It was not really necessary to do anything impressive in order to persuade the bad girl from Seattle into leaving her claws and fangs from the bushy dork.

Zoey and Chase just told Trisha about the job at the trash yard of Joe the greasemonkey. "This place will be much more fun for you than any boy here!"

Seeing that Zoey was no longer ticked off, Trisha lost all her interest in Chase Matthews at once, and she would not even dare to start wasting her time with Logan Reese or Michael Barret. Instead, she would follow Zoey's suggestion, and she would thus get stuck on Joe's very exciting junk yard. It was not hard for her to see that this was — at least accordin g to her own taste — an extremely interesting place to work.

* * *

**Chapter 14 Nerds And Robots**

* * *

**14:1 Girls For The Science Club**

* * *

**14:1:1 Evelyn Kwong Conquers Fire Wire**

So, Evelyn Kwong, a girl of partly Chinese origin, was now new at Pacific Coast Academy, and she had chosen this place more or less properly because of Wayne Gilbert.

Wayne and Evelyn were of course in diffferent grades, and thus they did not see each other regularly in the class buildings. But they did so occasionally when they ran across each other's way in the cafeteria and in the library.

Needless to say, those nerds loved the library and were addicted to many books. But they had not gone as far as aforementioned Miles Brody who had really founded a home in some corner of it, although that was definitely against the rules of the school. For them, reading books was not a purpose on its own, but just a tool.

A few weeks after the beginning of the academic year, Wayne was sitting in a silent corner in the mathematical section of Harry Schneider's Library. He was studying a complicated tool about optimisation and control theory. He did not talk to anyone about why he was reading that stuff, and only later it would be evident for everyone that he was most interested in building robots whose movements he needed to steer with remote signals. Like almost all nerds, he was at least half of a mathematical genius, but this did not mean that he automatically understood the book lying in front of him. He tried to accomplish some of the exercises after the end of a chapter. Clearly, the book was for college or univerity students and not supposed to be undrstood by high school kids, but Wayne did not give up that fast.

Along came Evelyn Kwong, another mathematical genius. She had hitherto not invested too much of her intelligence in technology and electronics, though. Seeing the formula in his book, she knew that this looked really challenging. Then she sat next to him. "Hi, dork, any troubles here?"

Wayne gasped. "What are you doing here again? Is there no safe place on this whole campus left?"

Evelyn grunted, "I am here in order to correct your mistakes, and to punish you for them!" She grinned sadistically, and then she grabbed his pencil in order to correct the scribbles on his notepad. "This should work, Wayne!" She grinned triumphantly.

Wayne used to cackle all of the time, whether he had a reason for doing so or not. "Call me Fire Wire, damnit!"

Evelyn growled, "I will call you just dork!"

Wayne looked aghast, forgetting even to cackle.

Evelyn grabbed him. "Kiss me, you dork!"

Wayne trembled and blushed over and over again. But he knew that Evelyn would be a big reinforcement for his scientific team, anyways, and that was regardless how much of an aggressive freak she was. Way, he was a freak himself, so he was not the one allowed to see anything wrong with that.

* * *

**14:1:2 The Reforms**

So, in order to speed up the development process of the construction of his robots, Wayne Gilbert deemed it best to include Evelyn — at least informally — into his team.

Still, this did not mean allowing any gorl to the scientific laboratory, as the theoretical preparations for the tasks of robot engineering could certainly be done outside the same — in about any place with a computer and an access to the local network.

Alas, the best place for doing so was the headquarter of the science club, as that's where Wayne had archved the process of the current projects,

And upon this step, Neil Wosniacki and Andrew Bernstein were getting already suspicious. "Wayne has got a girlfriend!"

Now the freaks were gathered in the lounge of Maxwell Hall, and they had to decide on the question of allowing the aggressive nerd lady yo access the project archives.

Evelyn was there, too, as she had followed Wayne around like a shadow.

Wayne was not at ease. First, he kept on insisting in being addressed as Fire Wire, and not as Wayne. This was valid not only for people outside the science club, but also for his henchmen.

Only Evelyn Kwong was allowed to call him a dork. Well, she was a dork on her own right, so this was not derogatory in any way.

Andrew remarked: "Now if you think that Evelyn Kwong is a reinforcement, there is no rule for excluding the other science girls, either, such as Melinda Crenshaw and Quinn Pensky." He summed up the inventions made by her during the last academic year, and that with very little support from outside. "Granted, not all of them work appropriately, but without a proper laboratory for testing …"

Wayne cackled, although he was not really content with his friend's conclusion. "But Quinn is a spaz!"

"Aren't we all?" wondered Neil Wosniacki.

Wayne cackled again, but he also banged his head against the wall. Yes, there was no way to avoid the correct conclusion that he was no less of a spaz than Quinn Pensky. "OK, let's drop that stupid rule!" He cackled once more. "Hell's bells … what have I just done?"

Evelyn grinned. "Kiss me again, you dork!"

* * *

**14:1:3 Discovery Of The Abuse**

* * *

**14:1:3:1 Quinn And Mindy Join The Stingray Scientists**

So, Quinn pensky was now finally allowed to the science club and its laboratory. But the question was: "Do I still want to?" Needless to say, she had come to see Wayne and his henchmen as foes during over a year of exclusion from their club. "They did not need me for fifteen months, and now … all of a sudden … is there something fishy?"

Mindy and Quinn had to ponder the situation. They even sensed sort of a trap there. But they were also under pressure.

Quinn's room mate Lola Martinez had forced her to cease experimenting in their common dormitory room. She was not supposed to know the details of the ongoing scientifioc projects, anyways. Some of them were a secret, as enforced by the sponsors. And Quinn was sick of telling her room mate and the girls next door that her research was only for the sake of her own personal preferences.

The situation for Mindy Cremnshaw was not substantially different, as she had got a dumb room mate as well, videlicet Mandy Franklin.

So the conclusion was finally clear, although it was not a wholehearted one:

Quinn and Mindy were new members of the Stingray Scientists' Club.

* * *

**14:1:4 Irregularities In The Archives**

The geek princess from Seattle entered the headquarters of the science club for the very first time.

The lads were very nervous, fearing that Quinn and Mindy would overthrow the whole chaotic order they had left in the cell.

Quinn was very critical. "I think that Albert Einstein deserves a bigger poster on that wall, ot just a stamp-sized one."

Mindy nodded vigorously.

The picture of the genius of the past was definitely more than stamp sized, but apparently not large enouh for Quinn's taste.

Wayne sighed. "OK, a door-sized picture of Einstein … what else?"

Mindy stumbled upon some folder. "Trip to the Marvel cosplay in Fresno …what is that?"

Wayne Gilbert went pale.

Quinn shrugged. "Yeah, what is it, Wayne?" She glared penetrantly at Wayne.

The dork cackled. "Cosplay is some … scientific meeting … and call me Fire Wire!"

Quinn gasped. "OK, you tell me what sort of science this _Marvel_ is?" Mindy shrugged. "Come on, let us go to the laboratory in order to deposit our scintific equipment over there!"

Wayne Gilbert trembled all over the place. "Here is the key …" He was of course reluctant in handing over the key to the laboratory room. But he saw no way around it, for Quinn looked really dangerous.

* * *

**14:1:5 Action Figures And Weird Dice**

Quinn Pensky was still left with an uncanny feeling concerning Wayne and his friends. But like Mindy, she was glad for being finally able to use the official laboratories of the science club.

The door had just opened, and a gust of wind blew some duust into Quinn's face.

"Those guys are really a mess!" She was holding a list in her hands in order to check what parts of her private laboratory she would have to accomodate over here. "Some of it will be obsolete. We don't need two good copies of the same device."

Mindy nodded solemnly. But then she discovered some corner of the laboratory room whixch was particularly clean. "This seems to be the favourite spot of the lads."

Quinn grinned. "Yeah, let's see what they like so much that …" She removed some planket. "Action figures?"

Mindy gasped. "Yeah, all sorts of heroes: _Galaxy Wars_,[14:1]_World Of Warlords_,[14:2] and … hey!"

Quinn looked closely at her favourite colleague. "Do you make sense of them?"

Mindy sighed. "Those are _Marvel_ figures … that is a brand of superhero cartoons, just like _DC_, their closest competitors."

Quinn replied: "As in Marvel Cosplay?"

Mindy nodded solemnly. "Cosplays are a kind of costume parties. The themes are from fantasy stories: mangas, online role playing games, …"

Quinn moaned. "those guys waste their time with costume parties?" She shook her head.

Mindy looked a bit embarrassed. "I have often dreamt of being Wondergirl, from _DC_."[14:3]

Quinn shrugged. "My cousin Camille wants to become an actress in _Galaxy Wars, Part XXV_."

Then they found strange dice. Those were bnot cubic as most dice, but they had got more faces.

Quinn named their geometrical terms, such as _dodecahedron_. Then she started talking about the symmetry groups of more or less regular polyhedra.

Mindy grinned. "Thoise dorks proibbly use them in order to play tabletop role playing games, in order to determine radomly the outcome of players' actions.." She was confirmed by the presence of collecting cards that were also used for games of that genre.

Quinn and Mindy suspired deeply upon having discovered the main activities of wayne and his pals.

* * *

**14:1:6 New Administration Of The Science Club**

Of course Quinn Pensky and Mindy Crenshaw faced the bouys with their discoveries and conclusions.

The boys tried immediately to come up with excusions, such as Wayne Gilbert's:

**_"_**  
According to Albert Einstein, God does not play dice with the world.

But I think that he does.

So we need to decide scientifically whether this is true.

And — of course — it must be determined what kind of dice are cast by God.

There are so many different kinds of dice, with lots of numbers on them.

It requires a lot of experiments in order to figure the truth.

**_"_**

Quinn glared at the cackling freak. "You doubt Albert Einstein's judgments?" Andrew replied: "Hey, we all bow to his scientific statements, especially concerning physics and chemistry."

Neil added: "But this is about God, so it belongs to the realms of theology, and not of science!"

Andrew nodded timidly. "Yeah, as he says!"

Mindy growled: "That is interesting … but if you don't believe that it is a scientific statement, there is no reason for veruifying it with scientific means, right?"

The freaky guys looked totally aghast.

"So what is going on?" MIndy glared at them with a terrifying grinace/

Wayne sighed deeply, and then he admitted to having abused the science club for the aforementioned purposes. "That is all Andrew's and Neil's fault!" He cackled mercilessly.

His pals looked dumbfounded. "Hey, it was all Wayne's idea!"

Well, it had started two years ago when those three bouys had met for the first time on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy. Wayne Gilbert reported:

**_"_**  
Well, it was not hard for us to discover that we share a keen interest in fantasy themed literature and role plays.

I was a member of the science club, because I had always dreamt of being able to relaise the infinite potential of possibilities shown in the _DC stories_, and I had already worked hard on electonic engineering, mechanics, and chemistry.

Wayne and Andrew were not keen on science, well, not more than the average people.

But I had got the idea of using the science club as a club for role playing and discussion of fantasy books.

This was of course only possible because the science club was almost empty.

Science had never been really popular here among the students, and the science teachers here are a joke.

The sponsors have paid us anyways, just for keeping the impression of a powerful science club alive in the public.

We did not want anyone else, be it boy opr girl, to join and discover our weird activities.

I had to do all the hard part of scientic research and planning.

Andrew and Neil are just useful for routine tasks.

Thus without your support, it won't be possible for much longer to keep even the illusion of a well functioning science club.  
**_"_**

Quinn sighed deeply.

**_"_**  
OK, I understand how you came to do this.

But now we are here, and this means a lot of changes.

Starting with this week, there wioll be a new and more stern planning of projects, and they will concentrate on real science.

You may still keep your fantasy toons, but don't expect them to get financed by our sponsors.

We will now deliver real results, and we will bug the board for employing some real teachers for science!

Melinda Crenshaw will be our new club president, and she will sure rule with an iron fist!  
**_"_**

Mindy grinned and she nodded, "Yes, I will!"

The guys moaned, but they had got no other choice.

Of course it was to be asked whether Neil Wosniacki and Andrew bernstein would still want to stay in the club, as they were now forced to contribute properly.

But with a charismatic club president like Mindy Crenshaw, even those freaks would be able to discover the genius within themselves.

The session was about to end, but Quinn had got one more resquest: "Guys, you talk abou cosplays. But have you also got a catsuit?"

Wayne Gilbert, Neil Wosniacki, and Andrew Bernstein glared aghast.

Quinn explained: "I wonder what I would look like, and how I would feel as Catwoman."

This was one supervillain from the DC series.

Wayne cackled. "Oh, I definitely want to see that, too!"

Too bad, they did not have any catsuit on store, but times would come …"

* * *

**14:2 Stingray Droid Factory**

At the beginning of the academic year, the science club of Pacific Coast Academy had enrolled in the so-called **Robot War League**.

In this contest, each team controlled a war droid with a remote. There were rules about the sizes and the weights of the war robots. The goal; was obviously that of desrtroying the opponent's droid.

This decison had been made before Quinn Pensky and Mindy Crenshaw had been allowed into the club.

For Melinda Crenshaw, there was absolutely no problem. She was keen on demonstrating her new photon cannon.[14:4]

But Quinn pensky declared that she did not want to invent things for destruction. Well, she was feigning so in a hypocrutical manner. She just wanted to make it look like a personal ethical judgment. The same way, she had already several times made her personal taste as a cover for hidden reasons.

* * *

**14:2:1 The Quinnterruptor**

Evelyn Kwong had been the first to question the original plans for Wayne Gilbert's design for a warrior robot. She was totally obsessed with increasing its destructive power, but this was apparently not possible with the current design.

In addition, the robot was a bit too large — according to the rules.

Wayne moaned, "so how are we supposed to maintain our fire power if we have to reduce the length of the lever for the death hammer?" He admitted to having designed the deadly tentacle using the arms, legs, and skull of Dana Cruz as an example. "She is really a human killer machine, worse than many robots." He cackled like an idiot.

Dana Cruz would sure have broken all the bones withing the freak, had she ever heard about this.

Quinn and Mindy replied unison: "use beam weapons!"

Wayne looked a bit consternated. "Aren't those a bit heavy and even huger?"

Mindy sighed. "Yes, I know, I have drawn plans for a hyperbolic photon cannon, but it really looks too big for the droid. We must find a way to reduce its size." She looked around. "Quinn, you have built that scarecrow with deadly laser beams?"

Quinn Pensky nodded solemnly. "Yeah, it fit into the head of a small scarecrow. But it is not yet designed for destroying metal plates."

"Never trust a scarecrow," replied Andrew. "Have you read Frank Baum's _Wizard Of Oz_?"

Quinn shrugged. "I don't read fairy tales for little babies. So, Ok, my scarecrow laser beams are suited for hurting crow-sized beasts badly, even destroying them sometimes." This way, she had to admit that her no-hurting policy had been a plain white lie. There was now no way to escape from getting involved in tke combat droid project.

Mindy concluded: "So we need to combine the fire power of my hyperbolic photon canon with the compactness of Quinn Pensky's mini laser.

The audience agreed wholeheartedly.

Mindy continued: "So, who will be our opponents?"

Andrew Bernstein reported: "The league consists of about twenty teams … twenty-two, scattered throughout California."

Wayne nodded solemnly. "But some of them have already given up, because they had been beaten up badly during the first matches."

Indeed, there were only two teams that had to be considered as favourites for the big bowl of warrior robots: The squad of James K. Polk and the team from Belleview.

According to Wayne, the Polkers had built a powerful machine named **Worminator**.[14:5] "This is probably honouring team member **Albert Wormenheimer**." He cackled. "Worminator … as if anyone was afraid of such a puny little worm."

Quinn Pensky intervened: "As endoparasites, nematodes and platyhelminthes may cause a huge amount of damage to your body … slowly and painfully from within."

Mindy remarked that _worms_ were not really a biologically reasonable category. "Platyhelminthes and nematodes are totally unrelated." She had thought about the genetic manipulation of certain verminous beasts, but she had not come anywhere.

Wayne was disgusted by worms, whether they made any sense as a biological category or not. "You think they may destroy hostile droids from within?"

Quinn shrugged.

**_"_**  
It would be a really creepy plan, I know.

But we have to be careful enough to expect about everything.

And I bet that Simon Nelson Cook is in their team.

He is really one cunning creep.  
**_"_**

Wayne nodded. "He is the ringleader of their squad, like …" He started talking about some of the cyborgs in the collected works of _DC_ and _Marvel_.

The other dangerous opponent to be mentioned was the team from Bellevie, and Mindy choked upon hearing this.

Wayne wondered, "Mindy? Are you OK?"

Mindy sighed. "Hardly!"

The lads and Evelyn did not quite understand.

Quinn Pensky took over for Mindy: "Belleview is Mindy's former school, and she probably knos something about the pupils thereoff."

According to Wayne, the Belleview team fetured a tank droid known as the **Blonowitzer**.

Mindy concluded: "It must be named for **Eric Blonowitz**, the leading nerd of the school." She sighed deeply. "But I am sure that also a certain Joshua Nichols is in the team."

Of course, Wayne had already heard about Josh, but ot as much about his scientific career.

Mindy explained, "he had always been stuck in my shadow. And now it is obvious that he will use the occasion to humiliate me." She also talked about her former crush on Josh, and how this had triggered her expulsion from Belleview and the subsequent transfer to Pacific Coast Academy.

Wayne cackled diabolically. "No way will he get away with that!"

Andrew and Neil agreed wholeheartedly.

Mindy continued: "I think that our batlle robot deserves a really fearsome name, too!"

Wayne nodded: "As Quinn will built the main weapon, I suggest it to be the mighty **Quinnterruptor**!"

The other members deemed that name perfect, and it was time for celebrating the start of the construction of the most awesome combat droid — ever!

* * *

**14:3 A Martial Training Robot**

* * *

**14:3:1 Mr. Takato**

Some evening, Wayne Gilbert, Andrew Bernstein, and Evelyn Kwong entered Kazu's sushi bar in order to order some green tea.

Kazu greeted the guests. "Sayonara! You are some members of the nerd team, right?"

Wayne cackled manically, just as it was his standard habit.

Andrew grunted. "Correct, but we prefer to go by _science club_."

Kazu did not care about the exact name. "Then it is good that I see you. My uncle Takato is here."

None of the stingray kids had ever heard about an uncle of Kazu.

Wayne cackled, while the others were annoyed. "Nice for him!" They shrugged.

Kazu continued, "Takato is a big adorer of your skills, and he needs your help!"

Wayne moaned, "a green tea for each of us, and we will take some time for your uncle."

So, there he was again, the great mystery man called Takato.

The name already suggests his Japanese origin, but he was born in the United States of America, and he was an alumnus of Pacific Coast Academy.

Wayne and his friends were waiting at their table when the old man of Japanese origin walked in. "Wayne Gilbert?"

Wayne thundered: "Fire Wire! Call me Fire Wire!" Then he cackled as if nothing had happened.

Evelyn calmed her boyfriend. "Let's here what he has got to say." She panted, and then she growled: "He better not waste our time, or else …"

Takato introduced himself briefly, but without mentioning his past/ "I am a teacher for mathematics at this middle school."

Evelyn glared dumbfounded. "I am a middle school kid here, and I have not yet come to see or hear about you," she growled with dismay.

This time, Andrew Bernstein had to calm her down.

Takato explained, "I don't really exist, but I am just a hologram."

Wayne cackled. Then he talked about the usage of holograms in his favourite fantasy cartoons of the _DC_ and _Marvel_ series.

Evely whispered, "I don't really think he's a superhero."

Andrew guessed: "Rather a super coward."

Takato ignored that. "I have disappeared during the war of Vietnam, but some engineer had recently built this hologram of me, based on memories found in my diary."

The nerds shrugged. "OK, so why are you bothering us? Do you want to make it into the fantasy comic series?"

Takato shook his head.

**_"_**  
During the war of Vietnam, I started training a platoon of secret warriors, called super ninjas, in agreement with the historical ninja movement of feudalist medieval Japan.

We fight all over the world for justice and security. It is not easy.

My partner in this enterprise, **Old Fukanaga**,[14:6] was one of the first ninja heroes. But he is dead by now, too. There's also a hologram of him in order to instruct the next generation of super ninjas, once their time has come.

This includes especially his grandson **Mike Fukanaga**.  
**_"_**

The stingray nerds wondered what they had got to do with all that.

Takato continued:

**_"_**  
In order to train the next generations of super ninjas efficiently, we need some technological support.

Your task is that of building one. You like building robots: So go and build this one …

Yamamoto, the martial training robot for the martial school of the White Dragon!

**_"_**

The stingray scientists looked shocked, as they had never thought aboutb that task. They needed to know more details, and they asked Takato quite a few questions.

"Seek and you shall find," replied the hologram before fading away.

Wayne,Andrew, and Evelym looked at each other, all puzzled. And now they were supposed to tell about this to the rest of their fellow stingray scientists.

* * *

**14:3:2 Constructing Yamamoto**

Quinn Pensky, Mindy Crenshaw, and Wayne's friends that had not been with him at Kazu's had got a hard time believing the story about a hologram that was Kazu's uncle Takato.

But at least Quinn saw no problems inventing such a thing. She knew a lot about the traditional Chinese ware academy. and she had already got a plan for implementing this ancient discipline in the form of algorithms and hardware elements.

Alas, regardless of how brilliant Quinn's ideas would potentially turn out in the end, such a project needed to be financed, and this was not easy.

In order to make it an official school project in the frame of the science club, they needed to get the approval not only of the school administration, but also of the relevant sponsors.

In this case, Pear Electronics was the one to convice. But was this possible by talking about Japanese hologram people and an academy for future super ninjas?

* * *

**14:3:3 Invisible Ninja**

Samantha Puckett had always dreamt of being an invisible ninja. For that reason, she was very much interested in the ninja training program. Unbeknownst to many ignorant people, she was much more versed in electronics than most people.[14:7].

While Mindy Crenshaw was trying to keep the Yamamoto project a secret, informations would eventually leak, causing a wave of rumours finally reaching even Samantha Puckett.

Was this the chance of the bad girl from Seattle to fulfill her weirdest dream?

* * *

**Chapter 15 Fake Spook**

* * *

**15:1 Halloween Party**

October had come to an end, featuring one of the favourite days of the year of most kids in America: Halloween!

During my life time, there had been no legal Halloween party at Pacific Coast Academy, and only after Vietnam did that change.

There was now a well established tradition at this most elitarian boarding school: Each year at Halloween, the freshmen of the high school segment of Pacific Coast Academy organised a haunted house for the elementary and middle school kids.

This year, Logan Reese had assumed the responsibility for this business, and he was up to scaring the livinmg hell out of the younger kids. Of course he was inspired by a bunch of horror movies that had already been published at Hollywood. His favourite was _The Liver Eater_, [15:1] a Japanese movie about canibalism and dark masses that was still illegal in the United States. But with Logan's connections and his money, it was absolutely no problem organising that kind of movie.

In fact, father Malcolm Reese was about to produce a new film of that genre: _The Night Of The Endless Knives_. The auditionings and the first scenes had already been started,yet the great emperor of Hollywood was still looking for reinforcements.

Logan had now got a glorious idea: He wanted to use the haunted house as a background for a scene from dad's new movies. In addition, he saw a smart way to iget the melementary school kids involved. With the help of Wayne Gilbert, he had hidden lots of night vision cameras in the spooky mansion, ready to film the reaction of the younger kids. Logan imagined that they would go absolutely pale for terror. He figured that the best terror scenes are thos with unprepared victims, and that's what Dustin and his class mates would be — beyond any doubts.

Of course just the darkness and a few plastic bats with grisly fangs woould not have done.

So Logan was up to going beyond that:

Both Ashley Blake and Lola Martinez wanted to be in _The Night Of The Endless Knives_. The two of them did not get along all that well, but for this night, it had to be. According to Logan, they would have to dress as walking undead during the latter third of the house of horror. This would have scared the livving daylights out of anyone — especially the elementary school kids.

Logan promised them that they would be in Malcolm's movie if they achieved shocking the little kids into oblivion.

Of course the two aspiring Hollywood stars had to keep their mouth shut about everything until the end of the Halloween horror trip — or else the whole purpose of their appearance would have been spoiled.

Lola, for example, would pretend to be completely absent from the campus for several days in order to shoot some movie at **Sunset Studio** in Hollywood.

* * *

**15:2 Monique Chaumont At PCA**

* * *

**15:2:1 A Surprising Appearance**

Zoë Brooks and her friends were sitting outdoors and walking up and down the campus in order to enjoy the last sunlight before Halloween night.

The only exception was Lola Martinez, who had got a pass to leave the campus in order to participate in a shooting event for a movie by Malcolm Reese.

Little later, two strange people appeared at the campus entrance, and they started talking French.

Zoë Brooks took a closer look at them, and she recognised one of them as no other than Monique Chaumont from Meudon International Prep School. She had no clue concerning the man by her side, and she guessed that it was Monique's husband. This was not an easy incounter for the Mary Sue from Louisiana, as she recalled that the offer from Meudon was still undecided. She needed to make up her mind about it during the next twelve months, or something like that. But she had hitherto refrained stubbornly from talking about these plans to any of her friends. She imagined that they would have been shocked to death about her revelation.

Nicole Bristow looked aghast at her best friend, remarking that the visitors spoke a foreign language.

Of course Zoë Brooks knew French extremely well, and she had understood every word spoken by Monique and her company. But she feigned not understanding them at all, as she would have otherwise been forced to admit to her connections with Meudon and to start rumours about the possibility that she was pondering leaving her friends for a new world. And she was by no means willing to do so — not right now.

Beverly arrived in order to guide the visitirs to the office of Dean Rivers. She also introduced the visitors as Monique and **André Chaumont**.[15:2]

Zoey shuddered, as she had guessed right. This meant that the next hours would be even more awkward for her. She would have to avoid doing anything that would betray her in the end,

Even worse, there was the possibilitu that Monique wanted to come to know Zoë Brooks in person, and that the school administration would do everything in order to arrange a meeting.

Was Zoey able to hide from the French guys until their departure? Well, it was possible on a day like Halloween due to masquerades and dark halls, but, as we will see later down the road, hiding in a tomb-like fortress was by no means a way of escaping from doom.

* * *

**15:2:2 Disguises**

* * *

**15:2:2:1 Zoey as Marilyn Monroe**

Zoë Brooks was now dressed as **Marilyn Monroe**, _some busty blond actress of the last century_. This was definitely not how a canditate for an elitarian scholarship at Meudon was supposed to look like. So this disguise appeared to be safe.

And, indeed, Monique Chaumont had hiotherto bought the disguise, although she had crossed Zoey's ways already twice.

Of course, Zoey still tried to avoid stumbling upon the French teacher. But this appeared very hard.

* * *

**15:2:2:2 Nicole As Dorothy Of Oz**

Nicole Bristow had chosen to dress as **Dorothy** from Frank Baum's _The Wizard Of Oz_. She explained her choice with the fact that Dorothy was supposed to have lived in Kansas, and that's where also Nicole was from.

During this fantastic story, Dorothy had encountered some sort of a lumberjack that had accidentally hatched all his limbs off, getting them replaced with metal.

Nicole Bristow had decided to get an axe stuck in her back, in order to make it look more like a typical Halloween disguise, and she accused the lumberjack of having accidentally hit Dorothy with the axe. Really, she equated the tin man with her frenemy Dana Cruz: "Dana has got no hard at all, and she is brutal and careless."

Zoë Breooks had designed and tailored the Halloween outfits for herself and for Nicole Bristow, but also for her own little brother and for a huge bunch of other students. She would have especially loved to create something impressive and fashionable for Lola Martinez. "As an actress, Lola must definitely love days like Halloween or Mardi Gras where she could fully practise her acting skills, complete with mask and costume, instead of being restricted to just talking in character." She did not know that Lola was really not far away, and she was indeed maksed and costumed for the party …

* * *

**15:2:2:3 David Bender As A Dummy**

The two girls were crossing the way of Mr. Bender, who had not been disguised at all. But Nicole Bristow guessed that their teacher was dressed as a dummy. That was of course not a nice thing to say.

But Bender did not object, and he just walked on instead.

* * *

**15:2:2:4 Quinn As Einstein**

Quinn Pensky was disguised as her great idol Albert Einstein. She had bought the mask from Joshua Nichols, who had recently worn the mask at school when he was student teaching a class of elementary school kids.[15:3]

This was of course not much of a surprise.

The geek queen had already thought about wearing a catsuit, as suggested during aforementioned session of the scientists' club, buy she had decided to save this most shocking option for some later and more appropriate moment.

* * *

**15:2:2:5 Mummy Chaos**

Her boyfriend Mark Del Figgalo was not yet dressed, but Quinn had decided that he would disguise as an Egyptian mummy, and she refused to allow anyone else to be disguised in a comparable manner.

**Timothy Jensen**[15:4] was one of those who had planned to show up as a mummy, until he was threatened by Quinn into desisting from doing so. He was an eighth grade guy on the list of Nicole Bristow's cute boys.

Too bad Nicole had already seen Timothy in a mummy dress, and now she was going to mistake Mark Del Figgalo for Timmy Jensen. This meant nothing good for her.

* * *

**15:2:2:6 Dana As Bigfoot**

Dana Cruz was disguised as an ugly monster, more precisely as a bigfoot. She had borrowed the costume from a certain **Sidney Van Gurbin**,[15:5] a self-proclaimed professor of cryptozoology. She was actually able to scare Dustin Brooks and his friends Jack Ross, Nils Jacobsen, and **Lucy Senner**.[15:6] Needless to say, she would get to hear some not so kind words from Zoë Brooks for that. Dana had also scred Nicole Bristow for a bit, and even more Lola Martinez, although the latter should have seen stuff like that in the costume storage of the local drama club or the Hollywood studios.

The blond Mary Sue was already upset because she feared that Logan Reese was up to going out of his way with his haunted house. She had made a subtle plan in order to make Logan pay for making fun of the fears of elementary and middle school boys. She wanted to follow her brother and his friends into the spooky mansion and make them pretend to bear frightened to death already early on. Even more, she wanted Jack to hide in the hall and to feign having disappeared. Then she expected Dustin to do the same. This way, she was sure that Logan would get scared to death and never touch a little kid again.

* * *

**15:2:2:7 Michael The Zombie**

Michael Barret was styled as a zombie of the most disgusting sort. He was smeared to some degree with fake blood.

People not aware of this as a Halloween disguise were most likely to mistake him for a badly injured student.

Unlike most other pals of Logan, Michael was not supposed to enter the haunted house. He was tiold to wait outside for a truck with supplies ordered by the jerk of Beverly hills.

Alas, such a truck would never arrive. Logan had sent Michael away, because he supposed his Afroamerican pal to spoil too much. He thought of him as a total whiner and coward, which was propably not all that far away from truth.

* * *

**15:2:2:8 Chase — Sorcerer Or Vampire?**

Chase Matthews was dressed as something that looked like a mix between a sorcerer and a vampire. More precisely, he thought of himself as a vampire, but he was generally believed to be a sorcerer. This way, he made once more a joke of himself.

I was not pleased by people making funs of the undead by wearing inappropriate costumes. But I figured that Chase was just a naïve fool, not aware of what he was really doing.

Anyways, it was better for him to be mistaken for a sorcerer …

* * *

**15:2:2:9 Lion, Tin Man, And Scarecrow**

Not only Nicole Bristow was dressed following a theme taken from Baum's _Wizard Of Oz_.

As aforementioned, Quinn pensky had introduced her scarecrow with deadly laser eyes to Wayne Gilbert and his henchman upon some session of the science club. The freaks had to think about the equally dangerous scarecrow from the aforementioned fairy tale.

For that reason, they had chosen to dress as Dorothy's companians on their way through the lands of Oz, along the yellow brick road.

Andrew Bernstein was disguised as the brainless scarecrow.

Neil Wosniacki appeared in the likeness of a cowardly lion.

And finally, Wayne Gilbert was dressed as a lumberjack that had mutilated himself with his axe, and whose artificial limbs were now made of metal.

The tin man was designed to look very similar to Quinn's first design of Yamamoto, the martial training robot they were up to building. But instead of an axe, he wielded some traditional Japanese weapon, thusly honouring Takato's heritage.

The lion was supposed to be fearsome, but the costume used by thsi dork here was rather intimidating, Indeed, Neil had scared Monique Chaumont to quite some extent.

The scarecrow costume consistef of the partly recycled puppet ised by Quinn in order to protect her banapple bush from wild birld attacks. It also included that laser beam, but it was even weaker than the original one — and thus only able to tickle human skin. This was a fortunate circumstance. There was also a Scarecrow character within the _Marvel_ cartoons, and this one had of course a big impact on the aficionados of the modern graphic fantasy novel. _Marvel_'s scarecrow was provided with some surgical implants.

* * *

**15:2:3 Into The Tunnels**

The first part of the haunted mansions were known as the _tunnels of terror_. Really, they were just a few lame Halloween distractions, nothing like the later rôle of Ashley Blake and of Lola Martinez.

Zoey was already looking forward to fooling Logan into the next millennium, but then she heard shocking news from Wendy Gellar:

**_"_**  
Nicole is in great danger.

Mark Del Figgalo is dressed as a mummy.

Nicole must mistake him dfor some cute boy, as she certainly does not like Mark.

But Quinn will kill Nicole if she finds Nicole kissing him — masked or not does not matter.

**_"_**

Zoë Brooks sighed deeply, but she was aware of the fact that saving Nicole's life was much more important than some cheap revenge against Logan. Now she ordered her brother to withdraw from the haunted house, and she suggested his friends to do the same.

Alas, Dustin turned once more sassy, and he claimed that he was afraid of anything that could happen in the tunnels and the final halls of horror.

Zoey sighed deeply, because she was already dragged out by Wendy. In addition, she knew that Dana was somewhere out on the campus, and she would be more scary n her bigfoot costume during the night than in the plain daylight.

* * *

**15:2:4 Legion Of The Undead**

Logan had successfully crossed the tunnels of terror, along with a bunch of kids.

Even Nils Jacobsen was consternated, and he trembled like aspen leaves in a hurricane.

Lucy Senner squeezed herself against Dustin and Jacob Ross.

Chase Matthews feared that Logan had gone out of his way. "You should really stop that!"

But this was of course no option for Logan. He had invested too much into the running project to stop it right here.

And there had already been quite a few terrifyibg scenes filmed by his hidden cameras. Yet there would be much more of them in a bit.

In this moment, the central hall of the building was left behind, and many of the kids had already believed that they were now thoroughly accustomed to the horrors on store. They had even started making fun of it.

But then the situation changed.

A phophorescent skeleton jumped up and down in front of the kids. It wielded a big bar and walked up to some coffin box.

The latter was locked, but it crashed open after being treated with the iron bar.

A corpse fell out of the coffin.

Kids watching this scene were already a bit more scared than during the first part of the haunted house. But they would see even really macabre scenes.

The skeleton shook the corpse vigorously, waking it up in the process.

Some red liquid shot forth from the chest of the corpse like from a sparkling fountain.

The skeletom dropped the bar and grabbed a cup in order to grab the red liquid, Then it rendered the little container unto the corpse

The latter grinned and drank from the cup.

This was even too much for Chase Matthews to swallow. He floundered clumsily until he lost his balance and slammed to the ground, but not before screamimg: "The corpse is drinking its own blood!"

Logan told him: "He wanted to be a vampire, yet you are unable to see blood?" He shook his head.

But not only Chase was scared dizzy by this ghastly scene.

The difference was that the younger kids had been just screaming aimlessly before passing out.

The lights went on, reveiling a bunch of unconscious kids.

Those who were still conscious could now see the corpse and the skeleton reveil themselves as Lola Martinez and Ashley Blake, respectively.

Logan congratulated the drama queens. "Good jobs! That cries for a rôle in my dad's horror movie!" Then he called the guys who had hitherto controlled the hidden cameras. "That was exactly what we needed for the movie."

Dustin was now slowly recovering from unconsciousness, but he was still dazed and hardly able to speak. But he overheard his stammering mates, and thus he came to hear that Ashley and Lola had been behing the parade of undead in front of their eyes. He woke up his other friends, such as Lucy Senner and Jacob Ross.

Lola licked some blood-red stains off her costume. "Yummy … sweet and fruity! I should have another cup of it!"

Ashley walked up to Dustin. "You look thirsty, so do you want some raspberry blix?" She showed him the cup that contained the red liquid that had been mistaken by the terrified onlookers for the corpse's blood. Unfortunately, instead of calming down her intimidated class mates by telling them the truth about the fake blood, she caused him to throw up and lose his supper."

Nils Jacobsen was already standing, but he was trembling all over his body. "Hey, why did the skeleton not play the violin?"

Logan replied: "Ask Chase, he's the playwright!"

Chase looked aghast. But he had actually written a horror story off which all those macabre scenes had been based. He had just forgotten about it, and he had never intended it to become part of the haunted house, let alone one of Malcolm Reese's horror movies. But now he would have to face Zoey's accusations.

Totally pale Dustin just wanted to see his elder sister in order to find some comfort. "Zoey!" He screamed at the very top of his lung, albeit in a distorted manner. Then he staggered away, hoping to reach Brenner Hall somehow.

But his sister was now busy in some different location.

* * *

**15:3 Chaos Breaks Loose**

* * *

**15:3:1 Dissuading Nicole**

Zoë Brooks was now out on the campus, and she finally spotted Nicole stumbling across the meadows, lusting for Mark del Figgalo whom she was mistakking for Timmy Jenson. Finally she reached her. "Stop! You are following the wrong boy!"

The bimbo from Kansas gasped. "What? I have seen Tim dressing as a mummy —- with my own eyes! And Timmy is os cute! Hey, I know why you don't want me to kiss him. You are after Timmy yourself, ain't you?" She grabbed her best friend and pushed her into the meadow.

Consternated Zoey shook her head. "No, Nicole! Quinn decided last night that Mark Del Figgalo would have to dress as a mummy, and nobody else was allowed to. Quinn will kill you if she catches you pouncing upon her boyfriend."

Nicole looked aghast. "Mark? I would have kissed Mark?" She went pale, and she plastered some spot in the meadow with the loose contents of her stomach. Then she coughed and moaned, close to breaking down. "And you did not warn me earlier? Nice friend you are!"

Zoey stood up. "Hey, I have tried to do so as soon as I knew about it." She wanted Nicole to return with her to the haunted house. "I need to be there just in case Dustin is too much afraid."

Nicole Bristow had still got problems. "No, I can't. I will hide in my dorm for the rest of the night!" She was too much embarrassed by the thought of having almost seduced the ugliest guy among the freshmen.

Zoey sighed deeply, but she decided to continue her way all alone. Unfortunately, she would not get very far.

* * *

**15:3:2 The Conquest Of Oz**

Dorothy of Oz alias Nicole Bristow, on the other hand, ran straight into Neil Wosniacki, Wayne Gilbert, and Andrew Bernstein — Dorothy's faithful companions. She was a bit dizzy. "Hey, what happened to me? Are you really the cowardly lion, the dumb scarecrow, and the heartles tin man?" She showed them the axe stuck in their back. "Never trust the tin man!"

Wayne cackled. "Yes, we are! Do you want to come with us to the Wizard?"

Nicole was totally cofused. "I guess that I have to. Let's find the wizard of Oz!"

Andrew continued: "And dispose with the evil witches!"

Nicole honestly believed that she was now really caught in the land of Oz. And as the campus, along with the vast majority of people crossing it, looked very unusual on Halloween, there was little doubt that this was the fantasy land of Oz, and not the reality of California. "Where is the **yellow brick road**?"

This was the main road through the land of Oz, which the heroes of the fairy tale had to follow.

The guys had at first glance thought that they were just making fun of Nicole, but now they were no longer sure, and they started believing more and more in having actually been teleported to the land of Oz, or were they only dreaming?

Wayne replied: "I don't know, I only see one road, and it is of grey cobblestone. But let us follow it!"

Andrew and Neil shared that opinion.

Nicole smiled. "OK, this is probably the yellow brick road. Wow, there's a big square with many people."

Wayne claimed: "This must be the market place of the Emerald City."

Said **Emerald City** was the capital of Oz, according to said fabulous story. But indeed it was of course the campus square.

Albert Einstein alias Quinn Pensky was standing in the centre of the square, next to the fountain.

Nicole remarked, "what a hobo!"

Wayne coughed. "It looks like Albert Einstein!"

Nicole did not know about this most famous scientist. "Who?"

Andrew chuckled. "That is some very wise and smart man."

Nicole concluded: "So this must be the wizard!"

Wayne agreed with the ditzy bimbo. "Indeed. Sir, you are the wise man that is said to be able to help us with our problems!"

Nicole nodded solemnly. "Oh mighty hobo, er, wizard!"

Quinn looked aghast. "I don't know, but if you do something for me, I will do something for you in turn."

The adventurers felt confirmed in their judgment. "This has to be the Wizard Of Oz in person!"

Quinn panted. "I haven't seen my sweetheart, Mark del Figgalo, for hours."

Wayne concluded: "The evil witch must have kidnapped him." He cackled.

Nicole nodded. "Sure, she does those things."

Quinn sighed. "OK, find Mark, free him, and bring him back to me!"

Andrew confirmed: "Yes, we sure will do so!"

The four heroes of Oz continued their journey, secure in the knowledge that they would have to find and slay the nasty witch. Otherwise they would not be able to break the forces of chaos and to restore peace to the land of Oz.

* * *

**15:3:3 Valiant Witch Slayers**

Michael Barret was in an exorbitantly desperate situation. He had been persecuted by Monique Chaumont and her husband André for over an hour already.

The French visitors had mistaken Michael for a badly injured guy, amd they wanted to take him to the next hospital. They did not know that there was an infirmary on the campus, but this was a minor issue. Most importantly, they were not aware of the fact that that Michael was just dressed in such a horrifying manner, and that he was not in need of urgent medical treatment.

Michael had finally reached the lounge of Maxwell Hall. he hoped to make it to his dormitory room, where he could hide from the evil strangers by locking himself away. But it was not so easy for him to move in his disguise. Thus he stumbled from one piece of furniture into the next.

And now the French visitors were close enough to reach out for what they believed to be a badly injured boy.

Michael screamed in agony. He had not really understood much of the talk of his hunters, and so he swore to trash his text book for French as soon as possible. He screamed that he was just a Halloween kid.

In this moment, the four heroes of Oz entered the lounge, which they guessed to be the palace of the nasty witch.

Nicole Squealed: "This must be the witch! She tries to kidnap and to kill another innocent inhabitant of Oz!"

Neil declared, "we must stop her!" He punctured his chin with his fangs. "Let him free! I am Neil the lion heart!"

Monique screamed, and she saw herself already in the stomach of the ferocious predator.

Likewise, scarecrow Andrew fired laser beams from his eye glasses, tickling Monique Chaumont in a terrible manner for several minutes.

At the same time, tin man Wayne Gilbert swang his katana. "Where are your other prisoners, you scum bag of a witch? Release them, or feel my sword!"

The intruders dropped to the ground, because the tickling attack made them unable to coordinate their own moves.

Michael sighed. "Thank you, whoever you are … Nicole?"

"Dorothy," claimed the bimbo, "and I am going to slay the witch, unless she tells us where her other prisoners are, such as Mark."

Michael choked. "Other prisoners?" He had not been aware of their existence.

Wayne fiddled with his katana above the heads of the intruders. "Tell us where you keep ypur other prisoners, or die!"

Zoey Brooks had heard the sounds coming from the lounge of Maxwell Hall. She had decided to watch out for what was going on in there. She turned the lights on. "Nicole?"

The wench was still all swallowed by her röle. "Die, evil witch of the west! We have been sent by the hono … wizard of Oz in order to free her sweetheart and to destroy his kidnapper!"

Zoey shook her best friend. "Nicole, wake up! This is Halloween! You are Nicole, my best friend and room mate, here at Pacific Coast Academy! Oz only exists in our dreams!" She coughed and moaned.

**_"_**  
The hobo or wizard is Quinn, our friend.

And her boyfriend Mark has already found back to her.

There were no kidnappers, either.

Mark has run afraid from you, because you mistook him for a cute boy in disguise.  
**_"_**

Nicole looked aghast, but then she started to realise her real situation.

Wayne, Andrew, and Neil were also concerned. "What? This is not the world of Oz?" But now they sighed for relief.

Zoey had already disposed with her ugly wig and her chest cushions that had made her look like Marilyn Monroe. She helped the French visitors to stand up again, and she excused herself for her own and for her school mates' demeanour. She had to explain a lot about Halloween and the _Wizard Of Oz_. It was not easy to talk about these subjects in French, but as a smart Mary Sue, Zoey was able to do so if she really tried.

It was obvious that some conversation of one hour was not enough to fix everything. The whole Halloween chaos had definitely not impressed the administrators of the Fench boarding school in a positive manner.

Zoey would be forced to talk to Monique the next day in the administrational office.

In addition, Nicole was now aware that Nicole had lied to her and their friends. "You do speak French? And you know those strangers? What is going on?"

* * *

**15:4 All Hallows' Day**

* * *

**15:4:1 Broken Dreams**

The night had come to an end, but Zoey was not ready for waking up.

Her last hours had been worse for her than any Halloween horror story.

First, Nicole Bristow had spent all night in Zoey's bed, hugging her tightly for fear of the revenge of the evil with. Apparently, the ditzy wench from Kansas had been going through broken dreams in which she was Dorothy, but this time, she had to feel the revenge of the nasty witch for having found her palace and freed her prisoners.

And then Dustin had appeared in the dormitory room of his little sister.

Of course this was against the rules, but Zoë Brooks could impossibly sent her trembling and shivering little brother away.

Making things worse, Dustin had stammered a few words about what had happened in the haunted house after her early departure.

Fortunately, Dana had not made it back to her dormitory room during the night, or she would have hurt dustin badly for using her bed. The reasons for this absence were not known to Zoey, but they had to do with the fact that Dana alias bigfoot had been, and still was, hiding in the shrubs.

Some unidentifiable freaks had believed her to be real, and they wanted to take pictures of her for a report.

From Dustin's broken reports, Zoey had been able to infer that Chase Matthews had been somewhat guilty. And now she would have to interrogate the bushy dweeb in order to find out more. And of course she was deadly angry at Logan.

In addition, Monique Chaumont and her husband André still had convocated her into the office of Dean Rivers for a serious interrogation.

But now Zoey had to free herself from Nicole's spasmodic embrace. Likewise, she could not leave Dustin behind in this room, for she did not now when Dana would return from wherever she was stuck. For the latter avail, she picked her mobile telephone and tried to call his room mate Jack Ross.

Unfortunately, Dustin's pal was not really accountable, and he was just screaming incoherent stuff about a corpse drinking its own blood.

Profoundly disgusted Zoey shuddered like nobody's business, while she tried to get Nicole's tentacular arms off her waist. "OK, it would be no good carrying Dustin to his own dormitory room." She needed to leave him in the custody of someone reliable.

Finally, Nicole relaxed her manica grip on her best friend's torso. She was still all dizzy, but she remembered that Zoey had promised to answer her questions.

"Let us get ready for the day!" growled Zoey, yawning heartily.

Nicole looked dazed, but then she started crawling out of her room mate's bed. "OK — but you still owe me the answers!"

* * *

**15:4:2 Nicole's Questions**

It was trime for breakfast, and both Zoey and Nicole were actually among the earliest students to show up.

Zoey would have preferred to hold back the necessity of answering her best friend's questions until the hour after her meeting with Dean Rivers and Monique Chaumont. She had carried sleepy Dustin like a little puppy into the dormitory room of Mindy Crenshaw. It was hard for her to believe that she could trust her baby brother unto a person that had once tried to ruin her life, but there was hardly much of an alternative.

Mindy had been one of the few pupils that had stayed totally normal on Halloween.

But Nicole was bothering her over and over again.

After having had a cup of javaccino, Zoey told Nicole about her connections with the prep school of Meudon, along with the offer of a scholarship.

Nicole was consternated. "You are going to leave me? Alone with Dana?"

Zoey had seen that coming. "I still don't know." She sighed deeply. "Maybe Mrs. Chaumont does not want me any longer, after last night's terror."

Nicole sobbed sadly, as she would have a hard time getting over a separation from her best friend and room mate.

Zoey sighed deeply, because she knew that this was only the beginning. She would have to explain her plans to many other students, and this would cause a lot of mayhem.

* * *

**15:4:3 In The Administrational Office**

Zoë Brooks was not feeling very well when she entered the office of Dean Rivers, where she had already been expected.

André and Monique Chaumont were alreasy present, just like the dean and his secretary.

And now Zoë was shocked once again:

Andrë Chaumont spoke English in a fairly fluent manner, although he was probably more of a French, Italian, or Spanish heritage. During the whole last day, he had apparently not been able to understand any English conversation.

Dean Rivers commanded Zoey to sit down on the last remaining chair. "I do not know what the hell was going on last night!" He panted and transpired. "I had never had ny good feeling when inaugurating Mark Del Figgalo as the class president of the freshmen. He is weak and grants Logan Reese just anything."

Zoey nodded solemnly. But she sensed that she was made responsible by Dean Rivers for having withdrawn from the elections, thusly helping Mark into his office. Then she tried to defend the foolish actions of her friend Nicole and of the freaks form the scientists' club. "I guess … I have to forget about a scholarship for Meudon?" She sobbed.

André told Monique about Zoe's remark.

Monique shook her head and declared that the offer was still valid.

Also, the deadline for Zoey to make her mind up was confirmed to the first of February 2007, which was exactly one year and three months to go.

But the dean announced some thorough interrogations. "The alumni and the parents of some of the students are already consternated, and they threaten with a legal intervention." It was necessary to punish Logan Reese as soon as possible. Rivers requested his deportation to Siberia.

Zoey gasped. "Isn't it also the fault of his father, Malcolm Reese? He makes all those scary movies on a professional scale."

Dean Rivers sighed. "Dern, I forgot it!" He explained for the visitors that Malcolm Reese, the mighty Hollywood csar, was one of the most important sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy.

Monique knew even some of his movies that had made it into the French cinemas and television broadcasts.

Rivers moaned, "OK, Miss Brooks, you will talk to Logan and anyone else responsible for the house of horror, and make them promise to never do anything like that again." He coughed. "This and a special donation of Malcolm Reese for a new toilet in the administyration building … the I will forget about the whole crap in the haunted house!" He wept some sweat off his face.

Zoey sighed. She felt that the whole responsibility was now resting on her brittle shoulders.

Rivers also stated that Nicole Bristow was a ticking time bomb. He urged Zoey to control her better. Otherwise, he would have to make some ugly decisions. Thus he made Zoey once more responsible for her class mates.

The conversation was now over.

Zoey greeted the visitors once again before leaving the dean's office.

Monique Chaumont was looking forward to seeing her in Meudon, either in fall 2006 or one year later.

The blond Mary Sue grinned, hiding how anxious she was because she had to make her mind up and face the reaction of her friends. But then she spotted something weird:

André Chaumont — if that was really his name — was wearing the mark of the **Airforce Crime Investigaation Service**. He was — or so concluded Zoey — a secret agent of this organisation, _an organisation for investigating crimes concerning the US Airforce, just as the state police or the FBI would for normal citizens_.

Zoey wondered:

**_"_**  
I have watched some episodes of _Airforce CIS_[15:7] by Malcolm Reese.

It was of course full of clichés.

But why is André really here?

I don't think that this is his name, or that he is Monique's husband.  
**_"_**

There was no time left for speculations.

Zoey had to take care of her pals and their felonies of last night.

* * *

**15:4:4 In The Lounge Of Brenner Hall**

Zoë Brooks was still confused from the meeting in the headmaster's office whe she entered her lounge.

Not only Nicole Bristow, Quinn Pensky, and Dana Cruz were waiting here for her, but also Logan Reese, Chase Matthews, and Michael Barret.

Zoey did not know where to start, but she was apparently upset. "Logan Reese, what did you think when …"

The jerk replied: "Lola and Ashley wanted a chance, and I gave them one!" He whistled innocently and shrugged helplessly with his shoulders.

Lola smiled. "I was great, wasn't I? You should have seen Dustin collapse like a sack of lard."

Smoke billowed forth from Zoey's capital orifices. She was of course by no means willing to tolerate making fun of her little brother. "Lola you … decadent drama queen!"

Lola stammered, "Logan wanted me to do it." She coughed. "And it was Chase's scropt."

Zoey grabbed the bushy dweeb and shook him vigorously. "How could you dare to inscenate such a grisly play in front of the eyes of elementary school kid?"

Chase explainbed that he had written the story for himself after having read too much of Edgar Allan Poe's dark stories. "I did not intend it to be used this way, it was but for myself." He shivered like aspen leaves.

Michael nodded. "Logan and I found it accidentally."

Nicole stood up. "Zoey, you call us all sorts of things, but what about you?"

Zoey glared at her best friend. "What do you mean?"

Nicole growled: "You are about to go to France without telling us a single word!"

Their friends were totally surprised.

Chase growled, "is that true, Zoey?"

She gasped. "Maybe … maybe not …" As she had not yet made up her own mind, she was not able to answer the question appropriately. But during the following manner, she stammered a few sentences explaining her connections with Monique Chaumont and her prep school in Meudon near Paris.

Chase Matthews felt seized by fits of panic. He sensed that his secret crush was soon gone without much of a warning, and without giving him the opportunity of admitting to his feelings. He was now even more mentally encumbered than before.

But Zoey's confession had also shocked the other pals in a more or less impressive manner. So, how was the Mary Sue going to decide, and how would her pals take it?

* * *

**Chapter 16 He Says — She Says**

* * *

**16:1 The Chase And Michael Show**

* * *

**16:1:1 Cartoon Factory**

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret had been bored during the winter, and thus they had started a new stupid hobby: They were now making short and dirty cartoon movies.

Why did they decide to make a step into that inappropriate direction instead of continuing their previous inclinations towards writing songs?

Basically, something or someone had told them that cheap and dirty toons sold a whole lot better than decent songs, and that they were much less work. And there was really nothing ressembling skillful arts in the comic clips planned by the two of them. They were certainly miles inferior to the fantasy comics that were still collected by Wayne 'Fire Wire' Gilbert and his friends.

Unfortunately, sites like **_Toon Juice_**[16:1] who paid for submitted videos would only have started to get interested in cartoons by artists that had already proven their skills to some degree.

And today's place for exhibiting one's artist skills in order to attract potential sponsors was certainly the interweb. Back in my times, there had been nothing like that, and amateur magazines — especially **fanzines** — had been the best way in order to distribute something like that. As you would have imagined, this was much slower and more tedious. But there had been certainly quite a few activities in that branch of arts even at Pacific Coast Academy, and I remember even someone running his own science fiction fanzine on the campus — secretly, as the school's administration had considered that part of modern literature as dirt, crap, and junk.

On the surface, censorship at schools like Pacific Coast Academy had ever since declined, making the situation — in theory only — a lot more liberal, but it was certainly still there.

Apparently, the interweb had not been developed exactly for stupid reasons like Chase's and Michael's tasteless cartoons, either, but for the exchange of informations that did not fit into the brains of certain boys residing in 148 Maxwell Hall. Computers of the early generation had been made by smart people for smart people, and not for brainless entertainment.

The latter had been made possible by the efforts of companies like Pear Electronics who had destroyed the computer culture by inventing devices geared for the dumb masses instead of the elite of hackers. Their major strategy was that of taking away freedom from the users of their software products in general by brainwashing the users into believing that they did not want freedom, but superficial convenience. This way, they exercised some extraordinarily malign influence on modern civilisation. But the loss of freedom caused by the enslavement strategies of companies like Pear was devastating, and the gain of convenience was just a stupidity.

Whatever the situation — Chase and Michael used Pear software in order to draw the cartoons and to animate them. Given their poor technological knowledge, their shallow ideas, and their miserable coordination, there was hardly any hope for anything decent to come out of it.

Each respectable web show had got a technical producer, someone like Quinn Pensky or Wayne Gilbert who really knew to use a web cam and the other hardware instead of fumbling aimlessly with certain buttons.

Chase and Michael had asked their geeky friend for help, but hitherto for no avail , as the latter was sunk in her studies and experiments, preparing for the upcoming very last fight in theri war robot league. Now the dweebs from 148 Maxwell Hall were stuck in their embarrassing incompence with respect to handling the technological equipment needed for a web show.

* * *

**16:1:2 A Devastating Start**

The beginning of Chase's and Michael's web show had been totally tedious.

**Jeremiah Trottman**, a freshman that was in charge with the redaction of _The Daily Stingray_, had critisised the web show in the feuilleton of this newspaper as plain boring.

Little wonder, the number of viewers — if counted reliably — was very low, maybe around one dozen. The count was hardly to be trusted, though, as the software used was somewhat buggy, and neither Chase nor Michael were able to deploy it correctly.

But some even worse criticism had been found outside the campus:

A website named _Nevelocity_[16:2] deemed the _Chase And Michael Show_ as worse than ten years in hell. And that web site had got a huge amount of viewers all over the continent.

Not only their cartoons were a plain catastrophe, but — even more — their skits.

Alas, those two dweebs would impossibly be ready to give up on their thoroughhly doomed project until they had got themselves embarrassed an humiliated to the death.

* * *

**16:1:3 Logan's And Zoey's Arguments**

The bad critiques continued, but now it was time for yet another session.

This time, Logan Reese and Zoë Brooks were present in Chase's amd Michael's dormitory room.

The former was here just because he officially lived here, although he was not a fan of the web show in any way.

The show's hosts greeted the viewers, and Chase introduced Zoey as a special guest star. He wanted to impress her by means of this show. Having heard about Zoey's connections with Meudon Prep, and he was now under more pressure than ever before. The situation of his secret crush was like the fabulous sword of Damocles: He did not know exactly whether Zoey was supposed to transfer across the seve seas for her sophomore year or only for her senior year. But in any case, there was not much time left. "The end is near …"

Logan grabbed the microphone, and he declared to greet a dozen of loser at the same time. Of course, he had got no high opinion of the viewers of the show.

Michael and Chase had to move on, announcing all the disgusting skits they were up to performing.

The wave of massive lameness was finally ready to start and to roll over the campus network.

And while Chase and Michael kept on boring the viewers with uncomely nothingness, Logan and Zoë started arguing in the background about fluffy comedies versus action thrillers.

A proficient technological producer like Quinn Pensky would have been able to eliminate the resulting background noise altogether.

But in the case of incompetent dorks like Chase and Michael, this was of course not the case, and the audience was thusly bombarded with rude and inappropriate words coming from the remote corners of the dormitory room..

Both of the show hosts were upset, and they banned Logan and Zoey from their room. Of course they could not really do so to Logan, but they did not want him here any longer during the broadcast.

* * *

**16:1:4 Change Of The Critique**

The next day, the feuilleton of _Daily Stingray_ reviewed once more the last aired session of the web show.

But instead of the expected flaming critique, there was a lot of praise for the new segment featuring Logan's and Zoë disputes.

Of course this had been by no means an intentional segment, but an involuntary accident.

Inspite of all the fuss, surprised Chase and Michael pretended that it had been part of their plan, and they wanted to continue their show with an official _He Says — She Says_ segment, featuring a debate between Zoë Brooks and Logan Reese about a previously selected topic, usually contrasting girls' opinions with those of boys.

It was obviously necessary for Chase and Michael to lift the ban that Zoey and Logan were currently under. And those teenagers agreed, of course not without requiring some reward in turn.

Jeremiah Trottman, who was not only the chief redactor of _Daily Stingray_, but also the chief moderator of the campus TV of Pacific Coast Academy, wanted desperately to broadcast _The Chase And Michael Show_ over the campus TV network.

Only the review from _Nevelocity_ was still as devastating as ever before:

**_"_**  
The new segment can't be considered as anything but a ticking time bomb.

It is sexist, as it aims towards cementing the existing prejudices of girls towards boys, and vice versa.

In addition, the provokive tenor will inevitably lead to trench wars among students at middle and high schools, undermining peace and security throughout the country.  
**_"_**

No one on the campus cared about the warning, but was it justified?

* * *

**16:2 Hypnosis**

* * *

**16:2:1 Nicole's Problem**

After almost two years, Nicole Bristow was still obsessed with cute boys, and more so than ever before.

Things had turned even a whole lot worse when she was forced to sit in their algebra classes, taught by aforementioned Mr. Kirby, behind three of the cutest freshman boys: **Daniel James**[16:3] alias Douglas Toader, **Harold Matthau**,[16:4] and **Lance McCallistair**.[16:5]

And the presence of those three guys provided for some terrific amount of distraction, paralysing the ditzy bimbo completely.

The school administration would soon be forced to denounce Nicole's problems to her parents, and this would be probably the end of her life as a student at Pacific Coast Academy.

In addition, Daniel James was an evil bully from the gang of aforementioned Keith Finch. They were together in the fencing team of the school, a really loud and boorish club, comparable to those thoroughly immoral and decadent student fraternities at German universities — known as _burschenschaft_ — that practised some kind of fencing, yet with degenerate rules nowhere near compatible with olympic fencing.

Thus Nicole Bristow was not only distracted from more important business such as following her classes, but she was also in danger of slipping into a morass of moral corruption.

After the events of Halloween night which had almost caused severe physical damage to André and Monique Chaumont, Nicole was even more threatened by possible punishment.

* * *

**16:2:2 Dana's Problem**

As you certainly remember, Zoë Brooks had refrained from getting Dana expelled by the end of the previous academic year, but she had neverless insisted in some therapy.

Marty Klemish, the school's therapist and private therapist of Dean Carl Rivers, was in charge. He had first tried to deal with Dana's bully demeanour in a group anger management sessions, but this was absolutely impossible, as all the others were too much intimidated by the wrathful Latina's mere vicinity.

Freudian analysis had not been of any use, either, for Dana just repeated the evil _f word_ over and over on the couch, in a way that was even too much for some patient therapist like Klemish to handle.

So, while Zoë Brooks was still willing to practise tolerance towards Dana, as long as she did not abuse Dustin and Nicole physically, others would sooner or later denounce the unruly Latina to the presiding authorities, especially the union of students' parents, who would hardly give the bully yet another chance.

* * *

**16:2:3 Quinn's Plan: Mesmerising The Troubled Girls**

When Lola Martinez was still an elementary school girl, she had already been trained by Erwin Sikowitz. In fact, she had been one of his first students after Ashley Blake.

Sikowitz had got very unconventional methods for teaching the art of acting to his students. In the case of Lola Martinez, he had applied hypnosis in order to help her to concentrate better on her röle, and thsi was obviously something very similar to Nicole's problem of concentrating on the classes instead of getting sidetracked by cute boys.

Instead of a pendulum, as used by most hypnotisers, Sikowitz used a coconut, or maybe two or three, and he juggled them in front of the face of his victims.

Quinn Pensky heard Lola's report, and as she had already read books about hypnotising in the framework of her studies of the human nervous system with the goal of hacking its limitations, she was interested in performing the same techniques in order to help both Nicole and Dana with their respective problems. Of course Quinn was more interested in driving the progress of her studies, and not so much in Dana or Nicole. But she would do whatever she was able to do in order to allow those girls next door to stay.

* * *

**16:2:4 Nicole's Trance**

Lola was watching Quinn fiddling with a little pendulum in front of Nicole's nose.

Quinn counted down: "Five, four, three, two" She skipped the _one_, because some freaks in Seattle considered this cool.

Nicole sank into a deep trance.

Quinn spoke to Nicole about her problem with cute boys, and she finally concluded: "So, whenever you see a cute boy, you won't think mit is a teenager, but … your grandfather!"

Lola looked aghast. "Her grandpa? Isn't that a bit weird?"

Quinn did not care. She woke up the ditzy girl from Kansas and hoped that it would work. Then she called Dana into her dormitory room.

* * *

**16:2:5 Dana's Trance**

Dana had been a lot more reluctand to submitting herself to Quinn's thereapy. And she still jkept on threatening Quinn and Nicole. "If you screw anything up, you will feel your bones burst into smithereens in no time!"

Lola sighed deeply.

Quinn shook her head, and she started counting down, as usual. Like Nicole's head before, Dana's was also full of microchips and electrodes in order to monitor her cerebral activities.

Dana did not feel them, though, for otherwise, she would have spun around and punched the living daylights out of the geek.

Quinn told Dana: "whenever you see someone physically weaker, you won't see him as a weakling, but as a poisioned trap that may kill ou slowly upon touch!" Then she lifted the hypnosis fromthe bully Latina.

As in the case of Nicole, time would tell you whether Quinn's attempts had been successful or in vain.

* * *

**16:2:6 Unpleasant Results Of Hypnosis**

Unfortunately, neither Nicole's nor Dana's hypnosis had provided the resukts that thengirls had hoped for.

And now time was running out of her hands, endangering their future as students at Pacific Coast Academy.

Granted, Nicole stopped rhapsodising over cute boys during classes. But she had now got traumatising hallucinations in which she needed to kiss her grandpa, give him his fake teeth, and feed him his oatmeal. Not only was she disgusted by these uncanny daydreams, but she was not the slightest little bit less distracxted from her classes.

The case for Dana Cruz was by absolutely no means different. Instead of refraining from threatening to kill weaker kids with her own fists, feet, elbows, kneeds, and her skull, she was now moving on to threatening them with sticks and stones. This was of course no less bullying than her display of her martial arts.

Quinn was now severely in danger, as she already felt Dana coming after her with heavy equipment …

* * *

**16:3 Dystopia On The Campus**

* * *

**16:3:1 Student Wars**

The ignored warning from the chieftain of _Nevelocity_ had finally turned out as right on spot.

Another segnment of the offensive web show had been aired,, and the ass of students was now polarised.

And the subsequent arguments had not stayed in front of the screen of the laptop or plasma screen.

Rather, there were now wild disputes in all class rooms of the middle school and high school segment of 'pca.

Dean Rivers was absolutely consternated. He was severely bothered by the ongoing riots, fearing for the escalation of violence on the campus and the loss of the school administration's authority. He was responsible for commanding the safety on the campus. Failing in doing so, the police of Los Angeles County would come and arrest him for having failed his duties.

Of course the board and overloard Leo Bradford would not welcome his weakness, either.

The teachers at Pacific Coast Academy, including David Bender, were absolutely unable to control the situation.

Dean Rivers was close to declaring the offensive web show by Chase and Michael for illegal.

But this would just have triggered more violent riots against the school administration, instead of just students versus students.

His secretary Beverly suggested:

**_"_**  
Do you remember the elementary school girl from San Diego?

She has beguiled wild animals with the sound of her oboe.

And today's students are apparently nothing but a bunch of wild beasts.  
**_"_**

Dean Rivers choked. "That is correct." He panted heavily. "Beverly, look up the number of Miss Parker. Offer at least five thousand bucks to her parents and her school for the permission to send her hereto!"

Was the cunning vixen really able to de-escalate the chaotic situation?

* * *

**16:3:2 A Lullaby The Masses**

The next day, Megan parker had arrived on the campus, accompanied by her useless step brother Joshua Nichols.

Wayne Gilbert, who had never seen much good in the _Chase And Mihael Show_, was glad that this would probably put an end to the dystopia that had seized the campus since the last edition of the obnoxious show. But he did not trust the presence of Josh, in whom he saw a spy from the team of Belleview.

But fortunately, there was hardly any chance for the dweeb from San Diego to make his way through the chaotic mob to the headquartewrs or the laboratories of the stingray science club.

Megan Parker did not waste any time. She raised her oboe in order to start blowing a soothing tune: Brahm's _Lullaby_.

Within just a few sonds, all pupils that had hitherto been heated and arguing over the issues propsed by the web show were now relaxing. They started to see flocks of cute sheep roaming the campus. Then they counted them in order to fall asleep.

Dean Rivers congratulated the cunning vixen for her eclatant success. "This is grea … one hundred and fifty-six … one hundred and fifty-seven … one hundred and fifty-eight … one hundred and …" His eye lids shut down, and he started snoring.

Yawning Beverly Brown had to try brew him and herselfd another cup of coffee, for his daily work was still not fully accomplished.

Megan returned and left a DVD. "My best lullabies … just play them whenever the campus is about to perish again in a wave of mayhem and turmoil."

Beverly smiled, but then she fell asleep as well.

* * *

**16:4 The Big Battle**

* * *

**16:4:1 Reaching The Warrior Bot Finals**

The Quinnterruptor had been a great success, and the stingray scientists' team had reached the Californian finals of the war robot league with ease.

But now it was the time for bringing it all to a conclusion:

Only three teams were left in the league, and those had to fight for the crown in a big match in the battle dome of Los Angeles.

The two other teams were, of course, those from James K. Polk in Santa Clarita and from Belleview in San Diego.

Only four humans were allowed officially in each team, so Andrew Bernstein and Neil Wosniacki had decided to stay out of it and to support them only from the ranks of the audience.

Wayne Gilbert, Evelyn Kwong, Quinn Pensky, and Melinda Crenshaw were highly motivated, because they needed to impress Pear Electronics in order to be able to beg more support for the martial training bot project.

* * *

**16:4:2 The Opponents**

* * *

**16:4:2:1 Belleview**

The team from Belleview had got a great season, especially ddue to the efforts of Eric Blonowitz and his long term friend _Craig Ramirez_.

Eric was your typical autistic savant. He was particularly knowledgeable in the realmso of electricity, but also of botanics and exotic animals, especially reptiles.[16:6] In the beginning, he had had his problems with something as brutal as killer droids, because he was more of a pacifist, but he had been persuaded into participating by a team mate.

Another member was **Craig Ramirez**, the best friend of Eric — at least on the surface. Craig had been following Eric all over the city for many a year, and he was deadly jealous when Eric dared to spend some time without in, for example for a school project. Craig was not really much ofd a scientist and engineer, but more of a romantic type who loved folk music.[16:7]. When Eric joined the team of Belleview, Craig had to join too.

Although the friendship of Craig and Eric had already lasted for so many years, it was thus anything but harmonic, at least not in certain episodes.

Craig had been the one least convinced of the robot battle team, and thus a failure he would have probably meant the very end of their friendship.

And — as expected, Josh Nichols was also an important member of the team. He had never understood Mindy Crenshaw and her motivations. He was still under the impression that Mindy was up to nothing but destroying him and his family, especially Drake Parker. He was clearly hell bent on seeing Mindy humiliated by his team's Blonowitzer.

Drake was up to being in the audience, and he would try to heat up the fans of the Belleview teams with the help of the sound of the rock guitar.

Megan Parker was also going to watch, but she was fairly neutral, because she had got too many friends at Pacific Coast Academy to cheer honestly for Belleview.

A certain **Mr. Roland**[16:8] was the official coach responsible for the team. He had been very stern during the last months. Was he going to be content with a failure?

* * *

**16:4:2:2 James K. Polk**

The chief of the team of the coolest middle school of Sanat clarita was aforementioned Simon Nelson Cook, known to be more of a cyborg than a human. This made it easier for him to develop a deeper understanding for the way robots thought and worked — or so he explained it.

His best friends Jennifer Mosely and Edmond Bigby were going to cheer for him from the audience room.

Simon wanted to impress in particular his team mate **Elisabeth Zemo**, a girl that he was hankering after since a few months.

In former times, Lisa had had a crush on him, but she got ignored badly by Simon, and that for so many foolish reasons.

And now he had to work hard in order to win her back, even to the extent of making a fool of himself.

Winning the trophy would certainly have been be a big step into the right direction — or so he hoped.

High functioning autist Albert Wormenheimer was the third person in the squad. He had been responsible especially for the necessary calculations. because he was an expert for differential equations. But he was definitely not someone in whose hands you would want to see a remote control, due to his clumsy movements. He was also a poor team player and preferred to work in extreme isolation.

The last member of the team was **Lance Widget**,[16:9] one of the most unpopular kids at James K, Polk. It was hard to see why he was integreated into the team, but he seemed to have some barely dispensable skills in handling potentially dangerous electronic devices.

The team was oficially coached by aforememtioned Mr. Sweeney.

* * *

**16:4:2:3 The Umpire**

Just like each regular contest, the Californian state finals of the war robot league needed objective judges.

In this case, the chief umpire was **Mr. Jamerson**,[16:10] a teacher for physics and chemistry at some middle and high school in the borg of Manhattan, the heart of New York City. Jamerson was not only a competent teacher, but also a researcher and inventor on his own right, just as many of the participants in the contest would have liked to become — barring those who were already among those. But, just as in the case of Quinn Pensky, many of his inventions were riddled with exaggerated side effects.

* * *

**16:4:3 The Heat Is On**

The teams were about to enter the battle arena.

The main sponsor of the Robot War league was once more Qualitech, and they had commanded one of their public relation managers into the arena in order to give a speech.

This speaker was no other than aforementioned Jake Savage, a very loquacious business officer.

The participants turned impatient, and they almost threatend to send their war machines against those talking too much.

Savage understood that, and he did not want to get bombarded from all sides by three infant-sized killer tanks.

Mindy Crenshaw was ready to operate the Quinnterruptor. She had struggled with that decision, and Quinn had tried hard to dissuade her from committing any stupidities, just because she was facing her secret former crush.

And this was indeed the case, as Joshua Nichols was chosen to operate the powerful Blonowitzer.

Simon Nelson Cook had insisted in commanding the Worminator through this ultimate deathmatch.

His coach, Mr. Balthazar Sweeney, gave him some last instructions.

Jamerson sat in a cabin next to the arena, and he blew the whistle for the start of the royal battle.

Unfortunately, Simon Cook was hitting the wrong button, He had discussed this possibility for hours with Lance Widget and with Lisa Zemo during the last night, but apparently nothing had come out of this.

As a result, the Worminator blew itself up, without even a trace of adversary impact.

The battle was thus over for the team of James K. Polk.

Only Belleview's Blonowitzer and the Quinnterrupter from Pacific Coast Academy were left in the match.

This meant that Joshua Nichols and Melinda Crenshaw were now fighting face to face for the great prize.

Mindy glared at her former crush. She had declared unto Quinn that she was now over it, and that's why she had been entrusted by her team mates with this task. She wauited now patiently for the bigheaded boob to make the first and — according to Mindy's whishful thinking — last move.

Josh was equally excited, because he had stil not forgiven the huge amount of humiliations he had suffered from Mindy's hands. He was far more impatient in his deeds. "Take this, you creature!" His fingers slipped and touched a little lever.

A missile was fired at the Quinnterruptor, but some invisible force field seemed to absorb the impact.

Josh choked briefly. "Oh, you think you can trick me into firing my weapons too early? Hah!"

Mindy shrugged.

Suddenly, the barrel of the Blonowitzer started to choke, releasing some weirdly billowing smoke.

Joshua looked aghast. "What is this?" He contacted Eric Blonowitz over a built-in microphone.

The inventor of Josh's tank sighed. "You have pushed the buttons in the wrong order. You pushed the green button when your instructions told you to push the red one, which was originally intended to be a blue one, atleast according to my proptotype description, revision 0.8."

Craig coughed. "Eric? Why did you change the colours of the bottons?"

They started arguing about the choices, but this was not helpful for Josh.

Indeed, there was nothing for Josh to do about the fact that the Blonowitzer was about to melt away.

Quinn gave Wayne five. "I saw this coming! That's how I got my father's sports car to melt away."

Wayne cackled mercilessly.

Evelyn yelled: "Get fried, baby!"

Jamerson's verdict was clear. "Belleview is down, Pacific Coast Academyis the winner!"

* * *

**16:4:4 The Age Of Win And Lose**

The battle was decided, and the Quinnterrupter had won without even being forced to fire its deadly beams from a micro laser cannon, the result of Quinn's recent research.

Now it was time for honouring the winners. Of course also the other participants in this final battle would receive a diploma for their efforts.

But only Mindy's team was worthy of a trophy:

The latter was an inoffensive rebuilt of the **Apocalyptor**, which was _the battle droid that had been built by aforementioned Cal Meacham, the winner of the first edition of this competition_.

Of course Quinn and Mindy knew him as the Caltech student that was providing them with lots of tools and materials needed for their daily research.

Cal was even here, and he was going to pass the trophy unto Quinn and her team.

Josh got a dipoloma for his team, but he was still looking aghast at Mindy. "She has now beaten me for the six hundred and sixty-sixth time." He stomped his feet, because he had to watch the passing of the trophy that he had been hankering after for the longest time, yet in vain. He sobbed sadly and started to suffer from some traumatic hallucinations.

Cal Meacham was now shaking hands with Mindy, and he gave her the model of his Apocalyptor. Sparks were flying, and both of the young people blushed visibly.

Josh, on the other hand, collapsed audibly.

Cackling Wayne walked over to the bigheaded dork and helped him up again.

Dazed Josh Nichols sobbed even more. "I can never beat her." He glared with empty eyes at his rival. "She does that just in order to torture me, she has always hated me that much. Why, oh why?" He started weeping.

Wayne stopped cackling. "Josh Nichols, you really don't now it?"

Josh gasped. "What do I not know?"

Wayne panted heavily before explaining:

**_"_**  
Mindy does not hate you, quite the contrary. She liked you from the very beginning.

But have you ever paid her any attention?

No, you foolishly listened to your jerkish step brother — all the time.

He told you to ignore geeky girls like her, and to go for those social butterflies that fall for him like …

She had certainly done a lot in order to get your attention.  
**_"_**

Josh gasped, and he started stammering with pain in his face.

**_"_**  
Sure you for real?

Megan has taunted me several times.

A girl treating a boy as Mindy did to me … must be love

I never believed my step sister:

She's one cumming vixen.  
**_"_**

Wayne shrugged. "your bad — and now it is too late, as you see!"

Mindy Crenshaw had now found a new love.

Quinn smiled, but she also pitied the losers, who were — after all — fellow nerds and scientists. She talked especially to the Albert Wormenheimer and Eric Blonowitz.

Megan Parker stepped onto the stage in order to play the classicist version of aforementioned _Sweet Victory_ for the winning team, probably in order to rub salt into Josh's still bleeding mental wounds.

Josh had to bang his head against the hard walls, and he would not recover that easily.

* * *

**16:5 The New Chase And Michael Show**

* * *

**16:5:1 A Technical Producer: Wayne Gilbert**

After the devastating consequences of the segment known as _He Says — She Says_, Michael Barret and Chase Matthews were pushed into giving thgeir web show some profound makeover.

The lack of a technical producer had been correctly seen as the main source for the lameness of the show, followed by the lame ideas of the show hosts.

After the end of the war robot league, Chase wanted to interview the members of the successful stingray scientists' team in order to fill a new session of the show with some interesting background information of the winners.

Wayne Gilbert was the first member of the winning team to face Chase's microphone.

As expected, Chase handled that accoustic device in a completely absurd manner, making Wayne's brain hurt.

The nerd shook his head and tried in vain to correct Chase. "OK, little wonder your show is a technological disaster. You need a tech producer." He cackled mercilessly.

Chase shrugged. "Are you up to that task?"

Wayne cackled diabolically. "Sure! But not for nothing …" His chuckling sounds became even more annoying.

Chase sighed deeply. "So, what do you want?"

Wayne explained: "If you produce decent toons in the likeness of works of the _DC_ and _Marvel_ series, I will be in the business." He grinned like a monkey.

Chase gasped. "_DC_? _Marvel_?"

Wayne nodded. "I may help you with the characters. In fact, we can't use those protected toon figures, so I have come up with quite a few ideas of my own, with the help of Andrew and Neil."

Well, familiarity with superhero characters was not really a weakness of Chase's. As an elemntary school guy, Chase had often worked in his uncle's book shop. Whenever he was bored, he had taken a look at the superhero cartoons for sale.[16:11] But nowadays he was totally embarrassed by it. Thus he stammered, "I know those, but …"

Wayne cackled. "Perfect! All you have to do is to write down a plot and the dialogue. You were able to write the play about the alien girl. This should not be a problem for you."

Chase sighed deeply. "OK, if you wish!" Certainly, the task was easy, for him, but he would go through quite some embarrassment. But he saw no other way in order to hire a decent tech producer for his and Michael's web show.

* * *

**16:5:2 A Co-Moderator: Trisha Kirby**

* * *

**16:5:2:1 Lame Skits**

Employing Fire Wire was a great step for the web show, reducing most of its technical problems.

But Jeremiah Trottman had also critisised the demeanour of the moderators and their skits.

In order to improve this, Michael was now thinking about looking for some auxiliary moderator. "It needs to be a girl, so we get more male viewers!" He sight heacily. "I've read that in a cheap magazine."

Chase saw the problem as well. He would have loved to employ Zoey for that avail, but he was still too much of a coward, and he knew that her presence would just have made him nervous. This was even more the case since he knew thanZoey was thinking about a switch to Meudon. He was tempted to talk her into refraining from doing that stepm but he would have to tell her the reason, and he was still way too much of a pathetic coward for doing so.

Fortunately, there was still the large bulletin board in the cafeteria.

Thus Michael wrote a note where he was looking for a female co-moderator for the show.

* * *

**16:5:2:2 Here Comes The Fun**

[16:12] Chase and Michael were sitting alone in their dormitory room, ad they were busy planning the next session. Unfortunately, they did not come up with anything decent.

Then a thundering voice was heard from beyond the room's door. "Chase! Open your dorm for me! Or do you want me to use a hair pin for that purpose?" The voice belonged doubtlessly to Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett. The bad girl from Seattle was an excessively skilled lock picker — of course a well-established family tradition. Trisha had already demonstrated her lockpicking skill soundly on Joe's trash yard for the purpose of wrecking old cars.

Chase Matthews was consternated. "Trisha! I have told you: It is over! I don't want to date you!"

The bad girl growled: "I would not want to take you back for all ham in the world!" She was totally obsessed with eating pork.

Michael Barret opened the door for Sam, anyways. "I don't like broken doors!"

Samantha walked in. "You need a female co-moderator who is able to pull a good skit, and there I am!"

Chase and Michael looked puzzled at the evil lass form Seattle.

Samantha announced: "How about a segment _Mess With Coco_! I would love to moderate such a thing."

Chase and Michael glared at each other. "Yeah, who does not want to watch Coco slip on the freshly-waxed floor in the hallways of brenner Hall?" They laughed insanely.

Trisha grinned. "Interesrted? But I need some payment!"

Chase sighed."What payment? I am out of bucks."

Trisha demanded, "some of your lunch … and you may certainly get a discount for me in the sushi bar of that Kazu, as you work for him?"

Chase nodded. "Maybe …" He was aware of Trisha's everlasting hunger. "I think you've got the job."

* * *

**16:5:3 A Toon Artist: Maria Misa**

* * *

**16:5:3:1 Software Problems**

The software used by Chase and Michael in order to produce cartoons was still a bit lame. It was good enough for pointless comics, but it was not suited in order to produce serious graphic novels about superheroes and supervillains.

Chase's embarrassment did not make his task any easier.

Michael was busy creating some background music for his toons. He had borrowed Wendy Gellar's synthesiser for that purpose. "This works like a charm!"

Chase's plots were good, even superior to those of the commercial graphic novels, but without appropriate graphics, it was not very valuable.

Wayne Gilbert had taken a look at the problem, and he saw the reason in the software used by Chase and Michael.

**_"_**  
It is specialised for Joe Everybody's purposes: lame, shallow toons with no meaning

Graphic novels, on the other hand, have got different requirements.

I would be able to fix that if I had access to the source got of the program.

But Pear Electronics refuses to let me disassemble, decompile, and hac the whole system.

This suck so much!  
**_"_**

He had even stopped cackling when making the last statements.

Chase summed it up: "Pear is the real suypervillain!"

Wayne nodded solemnly. "I could rebuild the software from scratch, but it would take me months." He suspired thrise. "Recently, Quinn had to invent a new operational system for the core of our warrior robot, the Quinnterruptor: It is called Quinndoze.[16:13]"

Chase had to acknowledge: "A cool name! And it obviously did the trick in the arena."

Wayne snickered. "Indeed. Nevertheless, programming everything from scratch for a platform based on Quinndoze will take me months."

Chase sobbed. "That's a long time."

Wayne nodded. "I think you are really better off letting a good artist design it by hand, and then scan it."

Chase shrugged. "I don't know any good painter, I mean, one with a paint brush and a canvas and so, like **Rembrandt** or **Michelangelo**."

Wayne nodded. "Just attacjh a note to the bulletin board in the cafeteria, and we will certainly find someone."

* * *

**16:5:3:2 Painter Girl**

Only one person replied during the following days, and Chase was now about to meet her for negotiations in the cafeteria.

Aforementioned Maria Misa was most skilled with the canvas, as she loved working with a huge variety of colours.

Chase had already seen her a few times since the beginning of the academic year, but not in his classes. "So, you are Maria? You like painting and drawing?"

The girl from the eastern coast nodded solemnly. "I have often painted pportraits of fellow pupils, back at my old school."

Chase grinned. "Would you also like to make pictures of fantasy figures, such as those superheroes from cartoons?"

Maria shrugged. "If I have a good description of it, I may certainly do so. I need to make a picture of it in my mind before starting to work on it."

Chase nodded solemnly. "Yeah, I have written sort of a description of some heroes, as I would write them in a novel or a stage play."

Maria had never done anything like drawing pictures for a graphic novel, but she was interested in giving it a serious try. She was certainly the closest thing to a professional drawer Chase and Michael would ever be able to stumble into during their high school time.

Chase picked up his telephone in order to call Michael, who was currently in the gymnasium in order to get some extra training for the next basketball match. "Hi Michael, Maria is cool." He panted. "I think we have found a designer for the graphic novel!"

Maria smiled, and she started immediately working on the graphic prototype of the first superhero from Chase's and Michael's new graphic novel.

* * *

**16:5:3:3 Nevelocity Praises The Show**

After having gone through weeks of troubles, the first edition of the new _Chase And Michael Show_ had aired officially.

Everyone was awaiting the reactions of the viewers, both on and off the campus.

Chase and Michael were of course particularly excited, It had not been easy for them to hire some reinforcments for the production of the web show, and so they hoped that they had made up fot all the trouble they had caused before.

The _Daily Stingray_ acknowledged at least the efforts of the production team, who had been able to replace the most controbversial part of the show, videlicet _He Says — She Says_.

So what would the external critics have to say, such as aforementioned _Nevelocity_?

There it was:

**_"_**  
We have already given up on all hopes for this previously lame and obscene onslaught on the human intellect.

But, like a miracle, the show has gone through a complete makeover.

Still, not everything shown so far is pure gold, there is also some pyrite among it.

But the improvements are remarkable.

The producers should keep it up.  
**_"_**

This was of course totally different from previous reviews from the same source.

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret, along with many other kids on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, wondered now who was the person behind _Nevelocity_.

Would they ever find out?

* * *

**Chapter 17 Mean Cheaters**

* * *

**17:1 Musical Hypnosis**

Dana Bruz and Nicole Bristow were already on the brink of getting removed from Pacific Coast Academy for their obsessive demeanour. And the knowledge about Zoey's possible departure for Paris was not going to help them any further.

Zoë Brooks had now postponed the decision to the enxy academic year, but this did noy have much of an impact on the mood of her friends.

Was Megan Parker really the last chance in order to save Zoey's room mates from their impending expulsion?

Wendy Gellar had been waiting for her best friend Megan, and she saw her now arrive at the entrance of Pacific Coast Academy. She had been waiting for her anxiously, because the two of them had got other things to talk about.

But now it was time for them to walk to the lounge of Brenner Hall in order to take care of the ditzy bimbo and the bully cheerio.

Both of the problem girls were stuck into a cabin on their own, where they wwre supposed to listen to some specifically selected tunes performed by Megan Parker.

This procedure lasted for over an hour, and nobody outside the cabins was able to see what the girls were just going through.

But would Megan's tunes really do the trick?

The procedure was now over, and both Nicole Bristow and Dana Cruz looked, sounded, and smelled just like before.

Had they changed at all?

According to Megan, her music does not change people, it just lets them become what they really are.

Nobody knew what that meant for Nicole and Dana, though.

* * *

**17:2 When The Baldwins Come**

As we saw before, there were a few transfers of pupils even during the running academic year.

Two of them were **Tracy Baldwin**[17:1] and her sister Sandy, or — properly — **Cassandra Baldwin**[17:2] from San Diego. More precisely, they had been pupils from Belleview, the same school as that of Drake and Megan Parker — and thus the former school of Mindy Crenshaw.

The reasons for their transfer was the fact that their parents were now travelling abroad for at least half a year, and it would not have been possible to take the kids along with them.

Like Zoë Brooks, Tracy Baldwin was a terribly overprotective elder sister. She feared nothing more than the possibility that Sandy would one day date a guy of the category _Logan Reese_. And it was not easy for her to oversee her sister's whereabouts on the big campus, as high school kids were usually hanging out in other segments than elementary school kids.

Sandy Baldwin was looking up to Tracy, but she did not like being treated like a little baby any more than Dustin Brooks did.

Tracy's burden appeared to turn much easier once she encountered Zoey Brooks who was in a similar situation with respect to her little brother.

Zoë was still upset because of the whole dirty affair involving Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett. Although she did not believe that the diabolic lass was still an immediate danger, she knew very well that Dustin was not unlikely to fall for other girls she would never be able or willing to approve of — at least as long as he was admiring Logan Reese for his womanising skills.

So, how had Zoey Brooks and Tracy Baldwin found each other?

A few weeks before the transfer of the Baldwin sisters, Tracy had watched the _Chase And Michael Show_, featuring the background discussion between Logan Reese and Zoë Brooks about fluffy comedies.

Tracy was a total fan of the latter, about as much as Zoey. Back in Dan Diego, she had watched abput all comedies in Helen Baxter's Première Theater she had been able to afford. For that reason, she had not hesitated contacting the Mary Sue, hoping for more useful information in order to get started at Pacific Coast Academy. Upon the same occasion, Tracy had already of course come to know Logan Reese, and she had beyond any doubt started to hate the creepy jerk duly.

**_"_**  
No girl deserves being the girlfriend of Logan Reese.

He treats us just like dirt — all of us!

It would be a nightmare for me to see my sister Cassandra hanging out with someone like Logan.

**_"_**

Little wonder, Zoë and Tracy had started working on plans in order to help preventing this worst assumable case.

* * *

**17:2:1 Womanising Lessons**

Logan Reese was just working out with heavy weights. He was surrounded by quite a few interested girls. This was really impressive for some onlooking younger guy:

Dustin Brooks, still sort of an errand boy for the mighty jerk from Beverly Hills, asked Logan even explicitly for lessons in womanising.

Logan grinned like a hyena. He explained that Dustin needed some cosmetic makeover in order to impress girls.

Dustin did not have the necessary salves and mousses for that avail, but this was now just a matter of time.

His friends Max Tebbe and Henry Nolston had noticed this, and they reported duly back to Zoë Brooks, making her understand that some urgent action was now due.

* * *

**17:2:2 The Conspiracy Against Logan**

Zoë Brooks and Tracy Baldwin had had the same glorious idea at the same time:

**_"_**  
If Dustin dated Sandy, both of them would be in a good company.

In addition, we would be able to control them with ease.  
**_"_**

But bringing those two kids together was of course not a trivial task:

Dustin would never have dated a girl just because his elder sister had told him to. Amd the same was valid for Sandy with respect to Tracy.

Some more subtle procedure was thus definitely necessary.

* * *

**17:2:3 Looking For A Double Date**

The next day, Zoë Brooks stumbled across the cafeteria, and she spotted a new note on the students' bulletin board.

Some Logan was looking for two girls for a double date with himself and his _junior partner_. The number of his mobile telephone was also attached.

Zoey had no problems seeing that this was no other than Logan Reese, and his junior partner was definitely her little brother.

The message also mentioned the age of Logan and his partner, and those numbers were correct.

**_"_**  
So, Logan wants to arrange a double date in order to teach Dustin the art of womanising.

There is no doubt that Dustin may only learn the worst from him.

But, hey, why not manipulate that date?  
**_"_**

She called Tracy Baldwin in order to tell her about her discovery.

After a few words of converstaion, Tracy suggested a simple solution: "Sandy and I will answer to the message." Upon that double date, Tracy would teach Logan a lesson — the hard way. "Let's hope that your brother Dustin will learn from it and understand that Logan is such a bad example for him."

Zoey sighed deeply. "Oh, I am pretty sure that he will!"

* * *

**17:3 Flirting Practice**

* * *

**17:4 Honing Your Acting Skills**

Lola Martinez was an excessively gifted futire Hollywood star actress already at her early age, but she was not yet quite there.

Due to the aforementioned successful active background part in Malcolm Reese's _Night Of The Endless Knives_, she had got more offers and challenges than ever before.

But she still still needed to hone her skills in order to be up to the really big rôles in the movies that conquered the cinemas all over the world.

Erwin Sikowitz had been a very inspirational acting coach for Lola, although he was pretty much a weirdo. But his emphasis on improvisational skill had already brought Lola very far, enabling her to skip classes and project by means of producing interesting excuses in a credible manner.

But now Lola was also thinking about being the female star in fluff movies.

This was probably a very demanding task, after all. For, while it is easy to make out or flirt for the camera with some one whom you deemed excruciatingly attractivce in real life was not much of a problem, only very few movies on the big screen were restricted to that kind of fluff scenes.

In other words: Lola could not simply choose the actors she would want to kiss for the camera, but she was supposed to leave those decisions to the producers, the directors, and the screenwrights. In order to be able to get as many opportunities as possible in order to advance to the top, she needed to be able to make out with random guys on a professional base.

It was thus a good idea for her to learn to be able to flirt or make out with disgusting dweebs of the worst sort.

* * *

**17:4:1 Lola's Options**

Victoria Gloria Martinez de la Vega went through a list of potential canditates for professional flirting or even kissing training.

The worst imaginable case would have been a guy like Mark Del Figgalo, the current boyfriend of Quinn Pensky. But that was of course a problem:

Quinn was more jealous than Greek goddess **Hera**. There was no way she would not let Lola feel her wrath, and that the drama queen's excuses would not be very convincing for her any more.

Lola was also thinking about Wayne Gilbert, but the guy cackled too much, and this was a very bad object to practise with in the beginning. She was easily distracted by his cackling noise.

This kind of accoustic distraction was something Lola would have learn to get rid off later on, but maybe Sikowitz was not the most competent coach here.

In addition, Wayne Gilbert had already got a girlfriend. Although Lola did not know much abiut Evelyn Kwong, she was sure that she was not exactly someone to take things easy. It just wasn't worth the troubles.

After sorting out a few more dweebs such as Nils Jacobsen, Andrew Bernstein, Neil Wosniacki, or Miles Brody, Lola had to consider the case of bishy dork Chase Matthews. She had been very well aware of what had been going on between Chase and Zoë Brooks during the last months, and even including the year before her arrival.

Lola was especially convinced of a weird connection between those two teenagers after the affair of Chase Matthews and Trisha Kirby: She had observed Zoey's fits of jealousy, and she had noticed that the blond Mary Sue had been the main reason why Chase had been dating Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett only reluctantly.

The way Chase was trying to avoid to have to admit to his more or less feelings for Zoey, while the latter was too snobbish to see that, annoyed Lola to no end.

But also Quinn Pensky, Dana Cruz, and Nicole Bristow had to suffer from this situation.

Lola conjectured that Chase should do something in order to make Zoë jealous, and that she would sooner or later break down and understand his feelings for her. "So why not use me in order to make her jealous?"

This looked like a perfect plan:

Lola would win acting practice, Chase would make Zoey jealous, and Zoey would finally be forced to do the right thing.

* * *

**17:4:2 The Birds And The Bees**

Of course Lola needed to find a good reason for approaching Chase in order to flirt with him in a provokive manner.

There had been several ideas in her head.

After a few minutes, she wondered whether someone as naïve as the exorbitantly bushy dweeb had already been educated about _the birds and the bees_ — meant metaphorically.

And this was a really inspiring moment:

Lola decided to ask Chase to tutor her in biology, about the procreation of plants: pistils, polls, … "This is a perfect topic for a seductive situation!"

* * *

**17:4:3 Lola's Tutor**

Zoë Brooks and Nicole Bristow were about to learn for a test in history about the American presicents of the past.

Lola walked into their dormitory room, and she announced that she needed tutoring in biology in order to pass the classes. She was of course just beguiling Zoey in the usual manner.

Zoey suggested immediately Chase as a tutor for Lola.

Really, this was not straightforward, as Chase was not as good in biology as Zoey claimed him to be. As seen above, he had been in need of tutiring himself in this subject.

Zoeë simply wanted to get rid of him, because she had almost felt stalked by him during the last months.

Chase tried to be around her whenever possible because of his unadmittable feelings.

This was too much for the Mary Sue, who needed more time for her own classes.

Lola knew of course about all this, and it was clear for her that Zoë would suggest Chase as a tutor, regardless of the subject.

* * *

**17:4:4 Date In The School Garden**

We have laready wondered about the botanical garden of Pacific Coast Academy because of Quinn Pensky's failed experiment with the banapple bush.

Well, the bush was no longer there, but this did not mean that Quinn had given up on the project of making banana plantations more robust and making it easy to add some variety to bananas' flavour.

Mindy and Quinn had just found some other way to do so, and they would sooner or later plant something else into this spot.

And until there was some other experimental shrub with dubious fruits, probably those of the randomly exploding sort, this place was a perfect spot for a play date between Chase and Lola disguised as a tutoring lesson treating the stuff with the flowers and the bees, a session supposed to end with a dreamy flirt.

Lola had borrowed some fifth grade text book in order to show Chase what she needed tutoring in.

Even a retard like Chase knew the content, so it did not matter at all that he was not really an expert for botanics.

As an actress, Lola was able to learn long texts by heart, and thus — or so supposed Chase — she would not have any problem learning that passage, either.

Lola claimed that text books were not the same as the script of a play. "Text books are lame, while plays are full of feelings, interaction … they are alive, like the birds and the trees, and the flowers and the bees."

Thus Chase embedded the passage from the text book into a little play featuring a brilliant student of biology who is on a fluffy cruise across the seven seas who was talking to a fellow passenger about the pollination of the plants.

This was of course no problem for Lola, and the beginning of what must have looked for some naïve onlooker like some fluffy interaction.

Not much later, Chase picked a particular flower from the garden, and he showed it to Lola.

Of course, the drama queen had always had the fact in mind that this closer study of the subject of the passage of the text book looked almost tantamount to a fluffy gesture.

Unfortunately, there was a spider sitting in the blossom of the flower, and thus the beautiful plant was dropped to the floor and stomped into pieces.

But this did not mean that the hidden date had failed, quite the contrary.

Now the drama queen and the bushy dweeb talked explicitly about having a date — and maybe more of that sort to come.

Lola did not feel really well in her skin, because Chase was so uncomely and annoying. But she was glad that she was professional enough to refrain from showing her disgust.

Those flowers had been around here on the campus already back in my time. There had been no girls at Pacific Coast Academy, but boys liked to pluck them in order to present them as a fluffy gift for lasses from outside the school, especially on Valentine's day. They may look all beautiful, but their beauty is treacherous and ephemerous.

Little later, Chase would talk about this flower and Lola in _The Chase And Michael Show_, whereupon the master of aforementioned _Nevelocity_ would comment appropriately: "Flowers are just toilets for bugs."[17:3]

* * *

**17:4:5 Zoey's Permit**

Upon her return into the girl's dormitory hall, Lola asked Zoey explicitly for a license to date Chase.

This was the ultimate step in order to provoke the Mary Sue's jealousy.

Zoë Brooks granted this license, and she feigned that Lola did not even need her approval. But she was definitely not at ease with the idea of Chase and Lola dating. On the other hand — she was also awfully excited, as she knew about the impending double date of Dustin, Logan, and the Baldwin sisters.

Lola gone, Zoey and Nicole continued learning for the history test.

But Zoey was not really able to concentrate on the presidents and their wives, but she was mentally occupied by thoughts about Chase and Lola. "They don't match at all!" There she was absolutely right.

Chase and Lola would have been a plain catastrophe as a couple.

Even Nicole, usually distracted too easily, noticed that something was going on. "Hey, you won't be jealous, Zoey? Why did you say you are OK with Chase and Lola dating if you aren't?"

"I am OK with it!" replied Zoey.

Nicole Bristow shrugged. She was still te same bimbo she had always been and would always be, but she was now secondguessing her room mate more and more. Whatever — she had to agree with Zoë with respect to one thing: "Yes, they are a terrible couple." She shuddered for disgust, ready to intervene.

* * *

**17:4:6 New Herbs**

Quinn Pensky was still working on creating new flavours for Blix. She was keen on making them appear natural.

During the last year, many commercial soft drink vendors had been accused of adding too many artificial ingredients.

Blix did not want to change their practice, they just wanted to make it look more natural. By means of this mean cheat, they would beguile both the critiques and the customers.

One of the products of Blix Quinn Pensky was working on was **Frazz**,[17:4]_an all-natural tasting power dink_.

The tasty sewage was of blue colour, which was very rare and definitely not natural. But nobody needed to know that, right?

Quinn at least believed that she would commit a good job in order to help the thirsty population in the developing countries. But hse was only contributing to the irresponsible wealth of one company: Blix.

Her research had come along nicely, but there was one problem:

Frazz was way too powerful, and this fact had scared Quinn pensky, although she had already seen a lot of stronger drinks, but they had not claimed to be all natural, unlike Frazz.

Quinn had accidentally let the content of some test tube drop onto some other plant in the garden, a _hevea brasiliensis_, and she got it thus to grow five times as fast as normal.

Fortunately, Eric Blonowitz from San Diego was a great fan of botanic gardens, and he was interested in helping with the project. But in order to do so, he needed some detailed and illustrated report about the situation here in the garden of Pacific Coast Academy.

And that's why Quinn was now out here in the garden, ready to prepare the report about the herbs planted for the production of Frazz.

Nicole Bristow had been looking all over the campus for the geek princess from Seattle, and only now had she found her here in the garden. She had been forced to ask her way around, and she had succeeded because she had not been sidetracked by cute boys.

Quinn felt disturbed in her concentration. She muttered a few scientific names. "Don't you see that I am busy?"

Nicole bowed down, and she made it clear that she had to talk to Quinn about her observations concerning Lola and Chase. "It is urgent!"

Quinn sighed. "You are right about Lola and Chase." She sighed deeply. "Neither does Lola like dweebs, nor would Chase want to cheat on Zoey."

Nicole smiled. "Now that you agree with me that there's something fishy, will you help me observe Chase and Lola, and then do something about it?" She panted heavily. "Zoey is in a terrible mood."

Quinn nodded solemnly. "This is the perfect situation for demonstrating the power of the **Quinnocular**.[17:5]" This was _a set of five telescopes bundled together and providing for several kinds of improved vision, such as infravision and x-ray vision_. Quinn had developed it a few weeks ago with the help of Wayne Gilbert in order to be able to study hostile war robots better.

Nicole was totally excited. "Quiinnocular? This sounds so cute."

Quinn nodded solemmnly. "And in order to prevent you from falling sleep while observing Lola and Chase, you will need to drink this … but only a little droplet, for it is too powerful."

"I love powerful drinks," admitted Nicole. "Maybe my dad should add more corn syrup into his juices, making them a little bit stronger."

Quinn sighed. "If only it were that simple …"

* * *

**17:4:7 Interrupting The Farce**

Lola and Chase were once more on a date.

This time, Nicole and Quinn had followed them silently all over the place.

The quinnoculars had helped, but Chase had more or less betrayed everything without knowinbg about it. He wanted to prepare some work sheets for Lola, but he was still not able to use a Pear-approved colour printer and a scanner appropriately.

Needless to say, this had already bean a great obstacle for his creation of cartoons.

Quinn Pensky had been the one to come to his rescue, because Chase was already desperate.

So, Chase and Lola were now sitting on a blanket in the garden, looking at a few sheets of paper.

In this moment, Nicole Bristow and Quinn Pensky jumped out of the shrubs behind which they had been hiding, camouflaged like elite marines in the jungle of Vietnam.

Lola and Chase were consternated.

Nicole did not waste a moment and come straight to the point. "Why are you doing that?"

Chase shrugged. "Because she needs tutoring in biology…"

Quinn laughed heartily. "This is elementary school stuff, while Lola is a high school girl."

Nicole beamed. "You can't fool Quinn."

Lola sighed. "Er, I have to do that for my little sister …"

Quinn coughed. "No way. You do not need tutoring, you have never tried anything but seducing Chase, for the purpose of acting practise."

Lola stammered, "how would you come to think that?"

Quinn grunted: "Because Camille has once tried something similar … I really don't want to talk about it, because I got confused with her." She shuddered.

Lola went pale, because she had never seen that coming.

Chase glared at Lola. "Did you really …"

Lola sighed. "But Chase is no better. He knows that he can make Zoey jealous with it, and he tries hard to do so."

Nicole moaned, "yeah, I knew it." She reported that Zoey was almost freaking out. "Anyways, I am tired of Zoey's and Chase's never ending story. I fear that this will continue even if Zoey goes to France." She coughed noisily, because she was not looking forward to that day.

Chase sighed deeply. "Maybe I should not use a friend for that purpose, only girls that Zoey does not know?"

Lola nodded solemnly. "OK, it was a bad idea. I had thought about it, but it's true, using someone unbeknownst to Zoey would be better for Chase. And I should not abuse unwary friends for my acting practice."

Quinn nodded solemnly. "Well, Zoey does not know my cousin Camille. Wait! She would confuse us … no good."

Lola grinned. "Hey, my sister **Trinidad Vega**[17:6] wants to become an actress, too, and she looks just like another Latina, She could help hase to make Zoey jealous!"

Nicole smiled. "Yeah, that will be cool!"

* * *

**17:5 Jerk In The Fountain**

* * *

**17:5:1 Dustin Learns Womanising**

Having received a thorough makeover, Dustin was ready fro a guided tour across the campus in order to hone his skills with girls. And he already noticed a few girls praising his appearance behind his back.

His guide was of course Logan Reese. He had restyled Dustin with the help of some professional stylist working usually with his father's production set. But he emphasised that the makeover, while certainly utterly nexcessary and reasonable, was by no means everything. Rather, He was now up to teaching Dustin some appropriate demeanour.

* * *

**17:5:2 Quinn's Trombone**

Quinn Pensky had already tried to start learning to play the trombone back at middle school in Seattle. She knew that many scientist were also skilled in playing some musical instrument, especially Albert Einstein and his violin. She wanted to play music in creative breaks in order to relax and recover from her intellectual activities. But of course a real nerd girl like Quinn would never have bern able to choose such an activity without developing quite some ambitions.

The choice of this brass wind as her instrument had been influenced by her association with the Puckett family.

Indeed, Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett was playing the trombone as well.[17:7] But she was no better than Quinn Pensky,

The two of them were up to performing a trombone duet upon one of the next sessions of the _Chase And Michael Show_.

But now Quinn had got a few difficulties with some tune she was trying to practise on the campus square.

Along came Logan Reese and Dustin Brooks, who were still on their tour that taught Dustin the finer skills of womanising.

Logan saw Quinn and her trombone, and he commanded FDustin to talk to her about her performance in an arrogant manner.

Dustin nodded and tried his best. "Hey Quinn!"

The geek girl asked Zoey's baby brother to tell her his opinion about her performance.

Dustin deemed mediocre, saying tyhat there were both better and worse performnces. He was just hinest and not unduly polite.

But Logan praised him for having treated Quinn like dirt. "All girls need to be treated this way. Otherwise you won't become a real womaniser." He grinned merrily.

* * *

**17:5:3 The Double Date**

We have already seen that Logan had been looking for partners for a double date.

As expected, Tracy Baldwin and her sister Sandy had applied on the appointment,.

The agreed location of the date was the fountain in the centre of the campus yard.

The jerk from Beverly Hills knew Tracy vaguely from one of his classes. He reminded Dustin of having to treat the Baldwins in an arrogant manner.

Dustin nodded, but his first action was that of praising Sandy's top. This time, he was once more totally honest. He was not going to lie just in order to look arrogant. And he was not going to allow anyone to change his taste.

Sandy smiled of course. "Thanks!"

This time, Logan was upsetm because Dustin had not been heeding his strict instructions.

But Dustin had already got his doubts.

Logan and Tracy were arguing about what movie to watch together in the campus cinema.

The jerk wanted some bloody action thriller, and he insulted the girls' taste.

Tracy wanted obviously some fluffy comedy.

Lohgan decided that if he was going to pay for the tickets, we was also going to choose the movie. "You girls may have it your way, but then you'll have to pay!"

Tracy was finally tired by Logan's arrogance, and she did what she had always been up to doing since she saw Logan dispute with Zoë during the _Chase And Michael Show_. She declared to want to see some other movie: _Jerk In The Fountain_.

Logan pondered whether there was even such a movie. Even as the son of one of the greatest Hollywood producers he did not know of any.

Tracy lunged forward and pushed Logan straight into the campus fountain.

Thoroughly wet Logan Reese growled, "hey, is there really such a movie?"

Dustin and the girls did not care.

Tracy wanted to take Sandy back to her dormitory room.

But her little sister decided to stay on the campus and to play with Dustin. "Catch me if you can!" She ran playfully away.

Totally wet Logan was still sitting in the fountain, pondering about the exiostence of _Jerk In The Fountain_.

Along came Nicole Bristow. "Hi Logan!" She ran in circles around the fountain. "What are you doing here? If the showers in the boys' dormitory hall are out of service, you may certainly find a few girls willing to let you use their bath room."

Logan sighed. "Good idea, but do you know a movie named _Jerk In The Fountain_?"

Nicole shrugged helplessly. "But if there ain't any, you can make one with your dad's equipment."

Logan smiled. "Good idea! I should start right away." He panted heavily. "Will you now help me out of the well?"

Nicole shook her head. "No way!" She kept on jogging, because she had accidentally drunk too much of Quinn's new power drink.

Along came Dana. "Hi, Logan, you must have felt very fdirty!" She chuckled subtly.

Logan asked Dana to help hhim out of the water and to get to some dry place.

Dana sighed. "OK! But don't get any dirty idea, will you?"

Logan sighed. "Ok, I won't!"

Dana grabbed his wrists and pulled him out of the fountain. Then she started rubbing him dry, using a towel she had forecefully borrowed from some innocent passerby.

Logan wondered, "why did you not kick me hard while I was down? That's what you used to do all the time, didn't you?"

Dana sighed. "Oh, admit that you liked it getting kicked hard, especially at the school dance?"

Logan blushed, stammering: "Maybe? But you have to admit that you like being treated like dirt by boys."

Dana blushed the same way.

Alas, this moment did not last long enough, and the two of them had to separate again because there was too much traffic on the campus square, and those two sadomasochists were way too much embarrassed by showing some kind of feelings. But would Dana and Logan tend to reassume this string of moments later down the road?

* * *

**17:6 The End Of Sushi Rox**

* * *

**17:6:1 Blazing Tuna**

Towards the end of the last academic year, Chase Matthews and Michael Barret had worked in a factory for sushi, but they had not learned much from that disater. Now they were still addicted to stinky fish and other icky stuff, exactly like Logan Reese, Zoë Brooks, Lola Martinez, Nicole Bristow, and Dana Cruz.

For that avail, the whole gang liked hanging out over at Sushi Rox until curfew.

Unfortunately, there were also less pleasant customers, such as **Coach Keller**,[17:8] trainer of the stingrays' basketball team. The creep had replaced Coach Ferguson after the end of the previous academic year.

Ferguson was now a full time professional in the farm team of some renowned basketball club in Los Angeles, ands he had no longer found the time to coach a team like the stingrays.

Keller was totally perverse in more than one way. He deliberately mispronounced _sushi_ over and over again, and he talked to his food — not the way Quinn had done at the beginning of the previous academic year, but in a totally brainsick manner that mocks any attempt of describing it.

Chase was not a customer, though, but he was working as a waiter and a delivery man for Kazu, inspite of his bad experiences. Maybe he had overestimated himself?

Although curfew was close, Zoey begged for one more meal, battered and deep fried sushi rolls known as _tempura_.

Kazu finally gave in, and he pulled the trigger of the stove in order to add quite some heat. He had just received a few orders from one of the lounges, and thus he commanded Chase to deliver some packages of sushi to the respective customers. He told him to refrain from carrying all at once.

Chase was warned, but he ignored this, and he walked away, anyways. Unfortunately, he was now overburdened and lost his balance while trying to walk downstairs.

His scream was heard by Kazu and by Chase's friends.

The latter rushed in order to come to the bushy dork's help, leaving the burning stove behind.

A few seconds later, not only the stove, but the whole kitchen was set ablaze.

Coach Keller found the fire extinguisher, and he lost no time trying to limit the damage.

Dana was a bit annoyed by the fact that a few flames had caused more damage than her blank fists during the last two years.

Likewise, the fire alert went off and informed **Chief Becker**[17:9], the boss of the Malibu fire brigades.

There was no need to wake up all the students that were in their lounges or dormitory halls, as none of those were even closely endabgered by the developing yet weak wall of flames.

But the morning after, the campus would not present itself nicely to all those who had slept through the night.

* * *

**17:6:2 Ashes And Dust**

The next morning, little was left from what used to be Sushi Rox, the popular Japanese pub on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

More precisely, while the outer walls of the building were still functional, the kitchen and its equipment were totally ruined.

Nobody had been physically injured by the fire, but this did not mean that their had been substantial emotional damage.

Chief Becker and his henchmen had also taken pictures of the ruins. They suggested Kazu to use those as proof for his fire insurance.

But Kazu reveiled that there had been no such thing as a fire insurance for Sushi Rox. He was now flat broke, and he would have to return to Alabama in order to start a new life with the help of some relatives. He announced to return to the campus after a few weeks, but only in order to fetch his remaining belongings. Thereafter, he would be gone for good from the campus of this illustrious boarding school.

For the students, this was of course not easy to swallow. There were not many pubs on the campus, and those outside were either unaffordable, especially **Pete's And Sam's**[17:10] and **Vaccaro's**,[17:11] or too far to reach without a pass and a car.

Chase Matthews, Zoë Brooks, Lola Martinez, Michael Barret, and Nicole Bristow felt not just sad, but also guilty, because they had been somewhat involved in the accident that finally resulted in the blazing inferno. They were looking to find some way allowing Kazu to be able to afford restoring Sushi Rox as soon as possible.

Coach Keller was in a really stinky mood, and he did make Chase and Michael responsible. He was of course up to making those teenage boys pay dearly for their deed.

* * *

**17:6:3 Fund Raising**

As some of the kids felt terrible remorses, they were looking for ways to rause funds for the reconstruction of Sushi Rox.

Last year, Zoë Brooks had tried to organise similar actions in order to be able to afford a concert by Drake Parker on their campus.

This had not turned out perfectly well, though.

Quinn Pensky and Mindy Crenshaw had not been present during the fatal night, but they had got some ideas, too. More precisely, they wanted to abduct babies, clone them, and then sell the clones to people willing to adopt them.

But their school mates did not really approve of that cool idea, and they expelled the nerd girls from their congregation.

Zoë Brooks suggested sort of a people auction.

The teachers were supposed to bid money for students doing some work for them, such as in their home and garden.

Dana Cruz stood up. Due to Megan Parker's oboe, she was no longer ready to beat the living hell out of those holding a different opinion. But she had still got her pride and her dignity. "No way I will do some dirty slave jobs for some snobs!" She stomped her feet and walked out, slamming the door shut.

Other students followed her example on site.

Nicole Bristow scratched her head. "Maybe Dana is not that wrong. We never know in advance what kind of tasks they make us perform. If there are perverts …"

Zoë Brooks nodded solemnly. "Yes, we better look for something else." Then she had to think about what she had learned during the last two years about the way this school worked. "We need sponsors for Sushi Rox, but we should be careful of their motivations!" She was also surprised because Nicole had once again agreed with Dana, something that had not been business at usual, at least not before Megan's apparenbtly miraculous hypnsosis by means of the sound of her oboe.

Nicole did not really understand Zoey's words, but she knew that there was some truth to it.

* * *

**17:6:4 Evelyn's Aunt**

Chase Matthews wanted to use the web show in order to raise funds by begging the viewers to send them some bucks.

This action of begging children for donations via the interweb was not just desperate and mean, but also illegal,[17:12] as he would little later learn from **Claire Sawyer**, _a student at James K. Polk Middle School that was already preparing for a career as an attorney_.

Chase discussed this idea with his technical producer Wayne Gilbert.

A few hours later, Evelyn Kwong contacted Chase. "Hey, I know someone probably interested in investing into Sushi Rox."

Chase and Michael glared at Wayne's girlfriend. "Who?"

Evelyn explained, "my aunt **Joyce Lee**[17:13] runs a chain of Chinese restaunts.**Wok Star**.[17:14] She is always interested in expanding her chain."

Michael wondered: "OK, that would save the sushi bar, but Kazu?"

Evelyn shrugged. "Make it a condition that he is allowed to stay here as a leading employee!"

Chase nodded. "But your aunt is Chinese. Does she really wantb a Japanese restaurant in her chain?"

Evelyn sighed. "If she can make money with it, she will be OK with a sushi bar." Then she blew some billowing smoke through her nostrils. "The Japanes have learned making sushi from the Chinese. You Americans are so crazy and stupid!" She looked at Chase with disgust.

Michael comforted his room mate. "I did not know that, either."

However, Evelyn had to admit: "I don't know where my aunt has got all that money from."

Chase wondered whether there was something fishy.

* * *

**17:6:5 Negotiating The Future Of Sushi Rox**

More than any other student at Pacific Coast Academy, Zoë Brooks was aware of the corrupting power of the sponsors. She did not know much about Kazu's upstrem provider.

And Joyce Lee's restaurant chain would have been yet another sponsor in the mix, and one — according to her own niece — a very dubious one to start with.

Thus Zoey doubted that it was a good idea to approach the negotiations in a naïve manner. For that reason, she wanted to consult someone more knowledgeable, videlicet aforementioned Claire Sawyer. She had been introduced to the future lawyer from Santa Clarita by Jennifer Mosely, back when they had been in the audience in the battle dome.

Would it be possible to save the sushi bar in an acceptable manner with the help of the mini shark from James ?

* * *

**Chapter 18 Gender Defenders**

* * *

**18:1 Spring Break Ahead**

* * *

**18:1:1 Various Options**

The darker time of the year was all but gone, and the days here at the beach of Malibu were already pleasantly warm and sunny.

This was the perfect begin of the spring break, the longest interruption of the academic year at Pacific Coast Academy barring summer break.

The boys and the girls were looking forward to a bit of hard earned leisure before spring term, the months that decided for many pupils at Pacific Coast Academy about success and failure.

The kids had fairly different plans for the following two weeks: Some of them were able to return home for a few days. Others were visiting friends living nearby. And there those more or less unfortunate ones who had to spent the whole break on the campus. And there were a few programmes for those kids, including guided visits to Los Angeles and Hollywood.

The juniors of the high school segment were usually up to using the time for scouting a few colleges.

* * *

**18:1:1:1 The Reese Summer Residence**

The family of Logan Reese was of course exorbitantly wealthy, and it was clear that they owned various estates, distributed all over the world.

Some of them were in countries far away and never really inhabited by the csar of Hollywood. They were used by employees and agents of the production set, or mere objects of financial speculation.

For those purposes, Malcolm Reese worked closely together with renowned international real estate agent **Vanhouser**.[18:1] That agency was located in New York City, though.

**Cameron Vanhauser**, the son of the agent, was not unlikely to become a second Logan Reese, as he had learned an insane lot from him, especially in the department of jerkishness and womanising.

As already mentioned, the main residence of Malcolm Reese was located in beverly Hills, guarded by dozens of security forces during the absence of Malcolm.

But there was also a summer residence in the county of Santa Barbara, thus a bit outside the noise of Los Angeles, but still close enough for a day's trip.

During of the year, the summer residence was overseen by majordomo **Phil Chawnsea**,[18:2] the closest confident Malcolm Reese had ever had among his employees, at least definitely more reliable and trustworthy than any of his ex-wives had ever been.

Talking about the women Malcolm was divorced from: They were usually gifted another estate form the Reese empire upon leaving the grand mogul of Hollywood.

Logan was not very familiar with most of them at all, but there were some exceptions, as you will see laater on.

* * *

**18:1:1:2 Four Girls Only**

Whatever the general situation, Malcolm Reese had decided to invite a bunch of Logan's friends to Santa Barbara over the looming spring break. He insisted in extactly four boys and four girls, which should have made it obvious that he was planning some production using them.

The kids at Pacific Coast Academy should have expected that, but they did not really know about his plans.

Really, his plans were simple: He was working on a new game show named _Gender Defenders_. It was one of those events making a group of boys fight against a group of girls.

But who would be those boys and girls?

Logan Reese was of course a given, and there was little doubt that his room mates Chase Matthews and Michael Barret were automatically preselected.

Concerning the girls, the selection was to be made among Zoë Brooks, Nicole Bristow, Lola Martinez, Quinn Pensky, and Dana Cruz.

Summing it up: There was one boy too few, but one girl too much.

Lola Martinez suggested an elegant solution to the problem: "I am a perfect actress, all we have to do is to dress me as a boy, which makes four boys and four girls. Consider the problem solved!"

Nicole looked aghast: But your hair, your face, your breasts …"

Lola grinned. "Oh, that's not a problem for a proper mask artist. Nicole, don't you want to go to beauty school when you are done here?"

Nicole smiled like a new-born sun. "Yeah, sure, I will turn you into the cutest boy … ever! And Zoey will help by tailoring some appriopriate suit for you!"

Lola scratched her chin. "I fear that I can't become a really cute boy … maybe somewhat cute, though …not too ugly, anyways"

Nicole glared at Lola, with a trace of disappointment in her face.

Lola explained: "In order to jide my breasts, I will have to grow really large sixpacks!"

Dana Cruz coughed and moaned, "what? No way, I am the one and only girl on the campus with real sixpacks!" She bulged her muscles, but she refrained threatening to punch a hole into Nicole's head, which she would have done before Megan's interventian.

Zoey shook her head. "Hey! there is one more problem!"

The other girls looked at their pal. "What?"

Zoey panted heavily. "Well, Logan wants a familiar face in his group, not someone that had just been made up, regardless of whether it's a real boy or not!" Nicole, Lola, Dana, and Quinn sighed, because this was so obvious — even for them.

The girls decided to play rock-paper-scissors in order to determine who was going to be left behind.

Zoë Brooks announced now that she was not going to go to Santa Barbara without Dustin. She admitted to have let him down too often, turning him in such a mess that had even considered dating some excessively loose girl like Samantha Puckett. "who knows which skunkbag he is going to make out with in my absence …"

Dustin Brooks and Sandy Baldwin had broken upo as soon as they had figured that their elder sisters had conspired in order to force them to date and ti be able to control them more subtly.

Zoey was now sorry, and she knew that she would have to do a lot in order to make up for the whole uncanny ness.

Dana was thereupon consternated. "There's no way I'll go to Santa Barbara with that cowardly little bugger!" Down to Megan's oboe, she had stopped bullying elementary school kids, but thei did not imply having given up on looking down on them.

Nicole squealed, "Zoey? You really want to leave me alone there with Dana? She will kill me!"

Zoey sighed. "Nicole! Dana does not do that any longer, just as ypu don't hanker any longer after each and every cute boy around the corner."

The athletic Latina laughed manically and shook her head, grunting: "Nicole is not worth wasting my time!"

Nicole stammered: "What is that supposed to mean?" Alas, she did noiot fear being exposed to Dana's rudeness, but she feard losing her best friend. She saw Zoe's departure to paris coming closer and closer, and so she wanted to spend as much time hith her as possible.

Quinn summed it up briefly:

**_"_**  
Zoey does not want to come without Dustin.

Dana refuses to come with Dustin.

So it is now down to Zoey versus Dana.

**_"_**

Nicole and Lola looked aghast.

* * *

**18:1:1:3 Rock, Scissor, Paper**

Dana Cruz and Zoey Brooks were sitting on opposite ends of a table in the lounge, ready to fight over the fourth position in the girl's secelection for Santa Barbara.

Nicole Bristow was cheering for Zoey, but she also felt Dana's gaze in her face, telling her to shut up.

Quinn Pensky was the referee of this decider, and she did not refrain from talking about the theory of rock, scissors, and stone.

**_"_**  
This looks like your typical zero-sum game.

Wins and losses for each option are perfectly balanced.

With equal probabilities for each options, a sequence of rock, scissor, and paper duels is a perfect example for a strong markov chain, exactly like radioactive decay.

Did I already tell you that Albert Einstein refused to believe that there was such a thing as randomly decaying nuclei?  
**_"_**

Dana growled, "no, you did not, but we don't want to hear anything about your theory, nerd!"

The other girls were annoyed by Quinn Pensky's incessant and interesting explanations.

Quinn closed her eyes, mumbling some words about dumb idiots and ignorants, and then she started giving the sound for the first turn.

Zoë Brooks was secure in the knowledge that Dana was going to choose _rock_, because the rude bully was always in for a fistfight. Thence she optioned correctly for _paper_, winning the first round.

Dana looked aghast. "Why does _paper_ beat _rock_ in the first place? That makes no sense!"

Quinn shrugged. "That's the game! _Zoey: One_, _Dana: Nil_!" She rang the sound for the second turn.

This time, Dana chose _scissors_, because she was sure that the blond Mary Sue would choose _paper_ again. "Only someone like Zoë Brooks would think that she could get away with something as nonsensical as thinking of paper as a powerful weapon." Or so she thought, and she was definitely not wrong.

Quinn Pensky's verdict was clear: "_Scissors cut paper_! It is _Dana: one_, _Zoey: one_."

The girls had agreed previously on a _best of three_ decision, and thus it was now the time for a tie breaker.

Zoey reasoned for herself: "Dana would never choose _paper_, so I can't lose by opting for _stone_." But she was wrong.

Dana had chosen _paper_, just because she was still convinced that Zoey was up to the same option, and she wanted to annoy Quinn by forcing her to repeat the turn.

"_Paper wraps stone_" growled Quinn, "It's _Dana: two_, _Zoey: One_" She panted. "Dana is the winner and will come with us to Santa Barbara!"

Zoey sighed deeply. But, then again, she had turned increasingly critical of the motivations of Malcolm Reese, so maybe missing out on the spring vacations out on the Reese estate was not really such a bad thing.

* * *

**18:1:1:4 The Fourth Boy**

There was still one male member missing in the group of kids bound for Santa Barbara.

As Dustin Brooks was now out of the race, Quinn Pensky suggested her boyfriend Mark Del Figgalo. This was pretty much natural, and you might have wondered why Quinn had not suggested this earlier on. But she had not been willing to start some new fights with the Mary Sue.

Logan Reese was of course totally disgusted by this option for the fourth guy, because he did not like the concept of spoiling the sacred earth of his estate with the most ugly dweeb of Pacific Coast Academy. "As if Chase and his bush were not already enough of a disgrace …"

Michael defended Quinn's wish. "If I had got a girlfriend, I would also want her to come with us." He sighed deeply, because he had already got a certain crush, but he had yet been too shy to talk about it.

Chase's mind was now burning. The news about the absence of Zoë Brooks from the trip up there was a shock for him, anyways.

A few days earlier, Michael had urged Chase again to tell Zoey about his feelings. He even wanted to dedicate a whole session of the web show to this important topic.

The days over in Santa Barbara would have been a perfect occasion — at least according to Michael Barret.

Chase did not know how hypocritical his best friend forever had been really. Now he knew that this occasion was no longer an option, for he would be separated from Zoey during the next days.

Logan had objected to Mark in the first place, but — on the other hand — he would not really have wanted any less ugly guy to come with them, because he did not tolerate any competition as a womaniser. For the same reason, he had already refused to pay for the spring fling concert of Drake Parker. Thus he sighed deeply, moaning: "OK, Mark Del Figgalo it is!" As we've seen, he was not as unhappy about this compromise as he had made his pals believe.

* * *

**18:1:2 College Hunt**

Mindy Crenshaw was already thinking about her life after high school. Her former expulsion from Belleview had not made it easier for colleges to accept her.

Of course many students at other high schools throughout California were equally looking for a life after graduating.

Many of the Californian kids were drawn naturally to the larger Los Angeles Area, next to San Francisco one of the most promising places for a postsecondary academic education.

Mindy Crenshaw was most interested in Caltech, the most interesting place for a future elite in physics, chemistry, and advanced engineering, and of course the place where Cal Meacham used to dwell. But was there a way for her to hide her previous past at Belleview? Her victory in the competition for warrior robots seemed — or so she hoped — to increase cher chances, but was it enough to make up for everything? Once more, she hoped for Cal's help, but she was not sure whether he was that influential.

* * *

**18:2 Stranded In Los Angeles**

* * *

**18:2:1 The Wrong Plane For Megan**

Megan Parker had been up to taking a flight to Denver in the state of Colorado in order to visit her friend **Jessica Wolfe**[18:3] over the spring break. She had been taken to the airport of San Diego by her useless brother Drake Parker, who was also accompanied by their step brother Joshua Nichols. Now she was bound for the airport of Los Angeles, which was apparently a very short air trip compared to a destination in Colorado.

Unfortunately, the jerk of a teenage rock star had confused the numbers of the flights. This was not much of a miracle, given that Drake had never been any good whatsoever with numbers. To make things worse, he had also forgotten to return Megan's mobile telephone to its lawful owner, and now it was stuck in Joshua's pockets.

Megan noticed that mistake only during the flight. Fortunately, she was not totally helpless: She had obtain ed a credit card from her mother Audrey, for cases of emergency just like this one.

When Drake and Josh noticed the catastrophe, they had immediately bought two tickets for the next regular flight to Los Angeles.

* * *

**18:2:2 Stuck In Los Angeles**

Back on the ground, Megan went straight to the next counter. She explained her situation to some clerk, and she wanted to buy a ticket fot the next flight to Denver in Colorado.

The employee of the airport administration had to disappoint the young lady from San Diego. "All flights to Denver have been cancelled for today, and maybe for tomorrow, too." She sighed, and then she expalined that there was some most violent thunderstorm visiting the mountains of Colorado.

Indeed, that poor excuse of a weather frog generally known as Walter Nichols had predicted nice weather for Colorado during the whole spring break.

His archrival Bruce Windchill had refrained from making any statement about the weather of the flyover states.

Thus everyone in California had been thoroughly misguided.

By the way: The rain storm had already started to haunt the mountains of Colorado during the previous night, and thus the flight from San Diego to Denver that Megan Parker had wanted to take was redirected to somewhere else.

Megan would have thusly been stranded somewhere in the middle of the land of nowhere, with nop friends and family at all. She should have been thankful for having been stuffed into the wrong flight.

It was not yet clear when the airport of Denver was going to be reopened.

Megan did not have her mobile telephone in her handbag, due to the aforementioned reason, and thus she was not aware of the fact that Drake and Josh were alreast about to come after her with the next machine. She decided to find a place to stay in Los Angeles until the flights to Denver were reassumed. Due to the credit card, she had got enough money at her command to be able to pay for a noble hotel and a limousine ride.

The hotel of Megan's choice would have been **Chambrolay**[18:4]

But Megan had got a better idea: Due to the many friends that she had got at Pacific Coast Academy by now, she thought about contacting them and to go on a shopping trip to popular warehouses such as **Wanko**.[18:5]

Of course her choice was restricted by the fact that there was spring break, and thus many kids, including some of her friends, were most likely out of town for a few days. She was especially sure that Wendy Gellar had returned to San Diego, while Ashley Blake was out for shooting a new movie, and she would have little time for hanging out in the city.

Before calling anyone, Megan needed either to buy herself a new mobile telephone devoce or go to a public telephone cabin.

* * *

**18:2:3 Megan Calls Zoey**

Megan had found a free cabin accepting her credit card as a pay phone card, and thus she did mnot lose any time.

Her first call was for her friend Jessica in Colorado. She was sorry for not being able to make it there, for various circumstances.

Miss Wolfe sighed deeply, but she had already figured that Colorado was a bit cut off from air traffic for quite a few hours to come.

Megan sighed for relief, and she promised to await the news about the reopening of Denver Airport. Then she decided to call Zoë Brooks.

The blond Mary Sue was astonished when heard her mobile phone ring, and she figured taht it was Megan Parker. "Hello? Megan? Aere you OK?"

The background noises suggested that something bad had happened, such as an emergency centre after a bad mass car crash.

Megan sighed and explained her situation as briefly as only possible. "Do you wnat to come shopping with me at Wanko's and some other cool shops in downtown Los Angeles? Dustin mmay come too, he's cool and not a boob."

Zoey moaned. "that would be nice. But I need a permit to leave the campus, and a responsible adult with a car." Aware of the fact that calling from a credit card based phone cabin was really expensive, and that it was unlikely to call her back, she asked her to call again like half an hour later.

Megan agreed wholeheartedly.

Zoë Brooks told Dustin about the situation.

The little brother beamed brightly. "Wanko is cool! Discount for one hundred action video games for a hole week! About thirty percent! I can't miss out on that!"

But this did not answer the question: "How do we get a responsible adult with a car?"

Dustin scratched his chin. "Unle Glazer is in town!" He smiled cheerlfully.

Zoë Brooks sighed. "You're right, I will ask him to take us and Megan to Wanko's!"

It would not be problem getting the permit from the administration as soon as Uncle Glazer showed up.

* * *

**18:2:4 Confusion In The Plane**

In the meanwhile, Drake Parker and Joshua Nichols had boarded a plane from San Diego to Los Angeles in order to fetch Megan. They were of course aware of the fact that it was not easy for them to find her there, as the city was big, and the cunning vixen was not known exactly for waiting tamely in the same place until her boobs would eventually show up — if at all.

Drake was very lucky, for he came to sit next to two hot teenage girls that were immediately ready for making hout with him during the whole flight.

But Josh was less happy about his place: Coined between an elderly couple of obese and grumpy people. The womans was even worse than her husband, and they argued over the fastfood served in the plane's board cafeteria.

Fortunately, the air hostess allowed him to trade places.

But now Josh was coming to sit next to a dubious person, indeed a criminal working for America's biggest gang of banknote counterfeiters: the team of **Milo McCrary**.[18:6]

Josh was proud of his new **G.O.**, _a device sold by Pear Electronics for playing certain audio files_. He noticed that his neighbour held a cimilar device in his hands, and he mistook it for a G.O.

But indeed it was a palm top containing detailed pictures useful for faking banknotes.

Making things worse, a turbulence was shaking the plane, and Josh was feeling the impact of aforementioned obese lady. In this moment, the two modern handheld devices got mixed up.

Needless to say, McCrary would not love to see that his valuable palmtop was now in the hands of Drake and Josh. He would certainly do everything in order to get it back, even if it meant to kill the two unwary teenage boys from San Diego and anyone associated with them.

* * *

**18:2:5 Shopping At Wanko**

The windy medic had gathered his nephiews and their friend Megan Parker, and he was now halting his craft in the parking house next to Wanko's.

Megan explained, "I could have rented a limousine, though." She sighed, because Glazer's car was definitely not a luxury transport.

But Zoey did not care. She wanted to see the new offers as soon as possible. Of course she was not interested in video games, unlike her little brother. But, on the other hand, she was glad that Nicole Bristow was not with them. "The dirtxy wench would have robbed my last nerves. She's addicted to shopping, and she finds cute things everywhere …" Since the incident on the campus shop involving cue pops and backpacks, a shopping trip with Nicole had been on the top of the list of Zoe's worst nightmares.

The main hall of the popular warehouse was full of discount offers.

But Megan was a bit wary: "I have heard that some shops announce there ware as having reduced prices, but that does not men that they have been sold for the corrsponding full price in thefirst place." She chuckled. "That is a cool! I should use that in order to trick the boobs next time."

Zoey did not exactly approve of that suggestion made by the cunning elementary school girl. Suddenly, she felt the vibrations of her mobile telephone. She gasped when she saw that it was a call by Drake Parker.

Megan wanted to let Zoë deny having seen her.

But the Mary Sue shook her head. "Hi Drake, Megan is here with me, Dustin, and Doc Glazer at Wanko's" She had not been pleased when Megan refused to inform her brothers. "But she is OK, you don't have to fetch her!" She did not know that Drake and Josh were already in Los Angeles.

Finally, they agreed on meeting on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy in the evening hours. "You may have a nice day at the school beach, and spent the night in the voys' dormitory room. So may rooms are empty during the vacations …"

Dustin was now grabbing a few adventure video games.

Megan joined in, and she bought some similar games, albeit of a different genre.

Still, none of the kids were aware that they were observed and hunted by a gang of bad criminals.

* * *

**18:3 Fine Time In Santa Barbara**

* * *

**18:3:1 The Trip In A Limousine**

Logan Rese, Chase Matthews, Michael Barret, Mark Del Figgalo, Lola Martinez, Quinn Pensky, Dana Cruz, and Nicole Bristow were taken to the luxury estate in a nice and comfy limousine.

Logan was a bit disappointed, because this was the smallest among those in the possession of the Reese family.

* * *

**18:3:2 The new Game Show**

Upon the kids' arrival on the estate of the Reese dynasty, Chawnsea had guided them into the impressive and almost palace-like building.

Malcolm Reese was already waiting here, and he had to announce something important, and precisely the reason for their vacations on this estate. He was supported by his secretary **Keera**.[18:7]

The latter intoduced the concept of _Gender Defenders_ unto the kids.

Then the two teams needed to choose a captain.

The boys chose Logan Reese, or, rather, the jerk chose himself.

Chase was too much worried about what Zoey was doing in his absence.

In the case of the girls, things were more difficult. They would usually have chosen Zoey.

Given that the game of _rock, scissors, and paper_ had worked well, they decided to do the same thing again in order to choose a captain.

And once more, Dana Cruz was incredibly lucky.

Malcolm Reese had got a gift for the kids: new mobile telephones produced by Pear and known as **techmates**.[18:8]

The teenagers were supposed to use them during the competition in order to communicate with their team mates. But they would also go and kkep them thereafter.

This was of course yet another marketing trick by Pear Electronics, the company that used Malcolm Reese's television and cinema productions extensively for spreading their own commercials. And of course a new show like _Gender Defenders_ always meant both a certain risk and new possibilities.

Like many other companies, Pear had to weigh and compare the risks and chances in order to decide whether to buy advertising slots during the interruptions of the broadcast time. Considering the huge and still growing importance of mobile multi-purpose telecommunication devices for the modern urban middle class youth, the decision in favour of _Gender Defenders_ had not been hard to make. And this way, Pear purchased not only a banner saying "brought to you by Pear", but also a future generation of customers.

According to Malcolm's announce, this was nothing but a test run for the real show. The winning team — or so he claimed — would be selected for the pilot that would be produced in Hollywood just a few days later.

* * *

**18:3:3 Nightly Meeting**

Night was about to fall on Santa Barbara.

The boys and girld from Pacific Coast Academy were now hanging out in the pools or other facilities of the luxury estate, or they were ready to watch a video in their dormitory rooms.

Those rooms were a bit bigger than those at Pacific Coast Academy, but not too much.

However, the captains of the competing teams, namely Dana Cruz and Logan Reese, had to attend one last conference with Malcolm, Chawnsee, and the umpires of the upcoming deathmatch.

Neither of them was particularly happy about still having to work that late, and now they would have to return to their friends or to their rooms in the dark.

Already during the conference, Logan Reese and Dana Cruz had started taunting each other, although it was restricted to short remarks.

Keera had had to intervene several times in order to prevent the problems from escalating.

And it was obvious that they would not return quietly to their respective camps, but would keep on provoking one another.

Logan bopasted, "How will you want to beat us? Stomp on all our toes so we won't be able to move?"

Dana roared like a lion, but she refrained from punching Logan's teeth into smithereens — as she would have done in her good old times. "Don't pretend that you diod not enjoy it after last year's school dance!"

Logan grinned. "Do you want to see the scars on my foot and legs from that dance? Maybe you want to lick them, they taste like pure awesomeness!"

Dana glared at Logan. "These will be nothing compared to the scars you will have tomorrow after the competition."

Logan shrugged.

**_"_**  
Yeah, scars from the explosion of a bottle of finest champagne from our wine cellars beneath us.

We boys will have it after the eclatant victory!

This is Reese estate, and girls can't win anything — never did, never will.

I am the somn of the show's producer, and thus the pilot will not do without me.

Mark my words!"  
**_"_**

Dana growled: "Come on, you don't need any champagne, you even can't walk straight even now. Of course you will be in the pilot … as the flower girl honouring the winning team … and thus me!"

Logan chuckled. "You feel honoured by my presence? Wow, I always knew that!"

Only a dimming lamp illuminated the archway Logan and Dana were about to pass. This allowed them to scan one another's outline, but not much more.

Logan Reese and Dana Cruz were now standing face to face beneath this impressive masonic construct. They did not say anything, and both of them blushed slighly, which — of course — was not discernable due to the lack of bright light.

Chase Matthews's voice was heard from down the hallway. "Hey, let's play a nice racing game!"

Logan did not want to miss out on that, and thus he hurried up.

Dana shook her head. "Jerk!" But then she returned to Nicole, Quinn, and Lola in order to watch _Girly Cow_, their favourite cartoon show.[18:9]

* * *

**18:3:4 Treasure Hunt**

The first task for the teams was a typical treasure hunt:

The kids had to find hidden hints insinuating the location of either the next hint, and to make sense of them. In the end, they would gather the parts of the combination of the safe containing the treasure.

Unlike their team mates, the captains were brought to the place hiding the treasure by some umpire. They were still allowed to communicate with their team mates by the way of their new mobile telephones.

The boys' team was composed of silly guys only without a trace of genius, as completely opposed to the girls who were relying on Quinn Pensky.

But on the on other hands, the hints did not really require much of a genius. And the boys had got a great advantage: Logan knew his own estate very well, unlike any of the other kids who were just visiting this place for the very first time.

In the end, the latter turned out to be the significant advantage making the difference, thusly making the boys lead out the girls after the first of three competitions.

The girls were here left in a stinky mood and started to argue. Especially Dana was mad at Quinn. "You are the genius. You should have known the correct combination to begin with!" This was of course really stretching it. Nicole wished that Zoey had been here, but would that have helped?

Logan Reese grinned triumphantly at consternated Dana Cruz, secure in the knowledge that there was no way for his team to get brought back again.

Dana looked viciously at her rival, and she grumbled silently thereafter. "Logan may have one the stage, but the race is not yet over!"

OK, so the treasure found in this treasure hunt was just the victory in the first stage of this trial session of _Gender Defenders_.

But the lads and lasses from Pacific Coast Academy had got dreams of much bigger treasures, both material and ideal, to hunt for, as had been obvious during the previous months.

For Chase, that treasure would have certainly been Zoeë Brooks, and he had not yet stopped dreaming of taking on the blond Mary Sue, but here in Santa Barbara, he had got some time to rethink the situation. He would certainly have committed several stupidities if Zoey had been around as well. So he hoped to gain some strength here on the Reese estate: The strength that he needed in order to strike finally a claim on the supposed treasure of his young life.

* * *

**18:3:5 Restyling Of A Nerd**

Now it was time for the second contest, challenging the creative abilities of the contestants.

Keera announced the task by introducing two adult nerds: **Marty Felsenberg** and **Nelson Pernell**.

Each of the two teams was supposed to restyle one of the guys into some cool-looking guy.

Recall that Nicole Bristow, together with Zoë Brooks. had won last year's middle school talent show by restyling Miles Brody in a guy that looked totally cute even according to the taste of the bimbo from Kansas. Of course, without the help of her best friend, she would not be able to make it that easily.

Zoë Brooks would of course have been useful due to her abilities as a fashion designer, but skills in tailoring and design were not required in this stage. The girls had just to choose from a variety of outfits offered by the organisation of the contest.

Dana Cruz wanted to be a future top model, and thus she had of course got a very keen sense of fashion and styling, although she lacked the artistic creativity needed for practicing beauticians.

Something similar, albeit in a much waker sense, was valid for a Hollywood actress like Lola Martinez. But she knew very well her way around a costume storage and a makeup studio, like all professional actors. And both teams were provided with some kind of depot for outfits and cosmetic articles to choose from.

Quinn was pretty much useless here, because as a wallflower, she had not got much sense for fashion. Granted, her past as a pageant girl would have helped her, but she was still not willing to admit to that embarrassing part of her earlier life in Seattle.

So, what about the boys?

Mark Del Figgalo was looking even worse than Marty Felsenberg and Nelson Pernell, and thus he was of absolutely no help. He was thus told by Logan to simply stay away.

Was Chase Matthews of any use? Well, if he had been really interested in styling, he would not have run around with some dense shrubbery on his head.

Michael Barret was talking too much nonsense, and he was very confusing.

Logan had of cause got a astonishingly great feeling for good looks, and he wanted to become a top model like Dana Cruz. But he was arrogant and expected the hard work to be done by others.

Comparing the individual skills of the contestants, it was easy to predict that the girls' team would win.

And in deed: The judges did not leave any doubt about about it. After two stages, there was a dead race.

By the way: The stage was sponsored by **Simon Christini**,[18:10] one of the biggest fashion labels of New York City. They were also outfitters of a huge amount of Malcolm Reese's movies.

* * *

**18:3:6 The Decider**

In order to determine a winner, a decider stage was due.

There was a pool with two islands in te middle. Each of them was occupied by the captain of one of the teams.

Thus Logan and Dana would have to fight for the crown, standing face to face. Both of them were equipped with a staff with two padded ends in order to avoid injuries. They had to try to use their sticks in order to sweep their respective opponebt off his feet and into the water.

You could afford visiting the water once, but hitting it twice would have ended the combat for the sake of your opponent.

The team mates were allowed to support their captain by the way of squirting the respective hostile boss with the aid of a pump gun.

Logan and Dana were facing each other, ready for a deadly battle. Needless to say, they started once more to taunt one another. At the same time, they fumbled aimlessly with their battle staff.

The only difference was made by their team mates.

Mark Del Figgalo was really unable to handle the pump gun, as opposed to everyone else. In the end, he squirted his own face, looking even dumber than ever before.

Chase was able to handle it, but he accidentally squirted his own captain instead of Dana Cruz.

Michael tried to aim at Dana, but he was distracted by some occasionally passing bumblebees.

Thus Logan was almost drowning in the squirt attacks, making it easy for Dana to sweep him almost accidentally off his feet, although she was busy with thinking of more and more ideas for sarcastical verbal attacks.

The combat was over, and the girls' team was declared the winner.

Thoroughly consternated Logan was now floundering in the pool.

Dana remembered how she had helped Logan to leave the campus fountain, after he had been pushed by Tracy Baldwin. She panted heavily, and then she jumped into the pool in order to fish him out of the pool.

Logan had of course never been in danger, because — like Dana — he was wearing some sort of a rescue vest. Thus he knew that Dana was just taunting him again.

They finally reached the solid ground.

And now those utterly wet teenagers did what they should have done already ages ago:

Thoroughly blushing Dana grabbed equally red Logan and pulled him into a deep, sensuous kiss, and that in front of a bunch of onlookers.

Malcolm Reese was consternated, but he did not do anything about it — at least not for the time being.

The other high school kids moaned in awe when admiring the wonderful couple of arrogant future models.

* * *

**18:3:7 Hidden Cameras**

The girls had won the contest, and they were now looking forward to showing up in the upcoming pilot of _Gender Defenders_.

And then Malcolm revealed that this was not a test run, but the pilot. He had hidden cameras in order to film the event.

In other words, both teams would be seen on TV — just a few days later.

The prize for the winner was another donation for their school — Pacific Coast Academy.

* * *

**18:4 Milo At PCA**

* * *

**18:4:1 The Global Positioning System**

The gangsters of Milo MacCrary had been in a stinky mood for losing their valuable palmtop and being left with a G.O. instead. They were sure that Josh Nichols had stolen the palmtop, but they did not know where Drake and Josh had been bound for.

But there was a possibility to find them:

The mysterious palm top had got a built in support for the infamous **global positioning** system, another technology on which Pear Electronics had spent an insane amount of efforts and money.

The naïve user was apparently happy to be able to locate the mobile telephone of their friends, but he was absolutely not aware of the dangers of the abuse of this system.

Indeed, this positioning system was nothing but an organised onslaught on the privacy of the users.

In our case, it was even more of a danger for Joshua Nichols and his friends, as the receiver of the palm top made it possiblo for Milo MacCrary to send some of his henchmen after the innocent teenagers that were now in possession of the item.

* * *

**18:4:2 Noticing The Mistake**

Zoë Brooks, her brother Dustin, and Megan Parker were finally back on the campus, where they finally encountered Drake Parker and Josh Nichols.

The teenage rock idol had to listen to some harsh words from his sister's mouth.

But Zoë calmed her down.

Joshua was now interested in boasting with his new G.O. He did not waste any minute and exhibited the device to the onlookers.

Wayne Gilbert walked up to the, "Guys, this is not a G.O" He cackled in a creepy manner.

Joshua choked. "What? Did they sell me some cheap copy?"

Wayne shook his head. "It is a palmtop for special purposes only, not sold at all in regular Pear shops."

Joshua gasped. "But I have still got the receipt for the purchase of the device … in the Pear shop in downtown Seattle. And I have already used it several times."

Wayne sighed deeply. "Then you must had traded it unintentionally."

Drake poked his step brother: "In the plane … the turbulences … the fat matron …"

Joshua twitched spasmodically. "Oh, the guy next to me had got a similar handheld device."

Wayne cackled. "I don't know what it is exactly. I could check, but if it is the remote control of a thermonuclear missile …"

Joshua twitched again, and this time in an even more powerful manner. He lost his balance and slumped to the pavement.

Zoey looked after him, but the bigheaded dork was fortunately protected by his obese hindside. She decided that itb was necessary to inform the police headquarters in Los Angeles. Having picked her telephone, she dialed the number of the responsible headquarter. She described the situation as well as she had been able to, but she needed Wayne Gilbert's help for that. Then she reported:

**_"_**  
Officer Garcia[18:11] has checked the data, and he figured that the device was stolen from the airforce

Now the US Airforce CIS is in command. They will send us a team of experts as soon as possible.

Until their arrival, no one is allowed to enter or leave the campus.

Garcia is now about informing Dean Rivers in order to request the cooperation of the school administration and its security forces.  
**_"_**

This did not look exactly like a nice setting for a spring time party.

Zoey remembered that she had recently encountered a special agent from said organisation, disguised as one André Chaumont.

* * *

**18:4:3 The Invisible Ninja Strikes**

Finally, the envoys of the Airforce CIS arrived on the campus.

Zoey recognised their leader as aforementioned André Chaumont — with mixed feelings. She still did not understand why this agent had been here on the campus during the Halloween night, using a fake name and a fake purpose.

André Chaumont reveiled his real name: David Alejandro Vega. As suggested by the family name, he was a relative of Lola Martinez De La Vega. But this was now not really relevant. Then he explained that the unidentiofied device was certainly not the remote controil of a nuclear bomb, or anything like that.

The palmtop was used for storing huge amount of secret sketches and maps. It was not clear what data the thieves had used it for, but it was most likely something illegal.

Unfortunately, the fact that the palmtop was not immediately dangerous meant that David Alejandro Vega was not allowed to grant a lot of units in order to protect the campus of Pacific Coast Academy and its students. He took the palm top and tucked it safely away.

But Wayne Gilbert persuaded him into letting him check its contents. A few minutes later, he figured that the data were sketches of bank notes.

The thieves had to be money fakers, and most likely those belonging to the gang of Milo McCrary.

The special agent had to record the statements of the involved kids. Then he had to return to Los Angeles.

All of a sudden, a screan was heard from beyond the shrubs.

Vega and his officers went in order to check.

Samantha Puckett was sitting on the back of some wounded stranger, identifiable as Milo McCrary. She had been stalking him and brought down by a surprise attack. She had learned this from Wayne Gilbert's training robot. "Daddy!"

Zoey gasped. "McCrary is your father?"

Sam alias Trisha nodded sadly. "he let us down long time ago …" She did not want to talk about it.

David Alejandro Vega and his officers arrested McCrary and dragged him away.

At the same time, the Pacific Coast Academy security force had arrested the henchmen of the king of fake banknotes.

Zoey sighed deeply, as she did not really understand what had just been going on.

The day after, Megan would continue her way to Colorado in order to see her friend Jessiaca Wolfe.

Likewise, Drake and Josh would have to return to San Diego in order to help Helen Baxter in her movie theatre.

* * *

**Chapter 19 A new Home For A Peruvian Alpaca**

* * *

**19:1 Michael Likes Vanessa**

As you surely remember, Michael Barret had been dancing with a certain Farfalla at the end of last year's middle school dance, and he had had a lot of fun back then. But by the middle of his freshman year, had completely forgotten about this, although he had implicitly promised to marry that girl.

This fact was not cancelled just because Michael amd Farfalla had not seen each other during his whole freshman year.

But the embarrassed jazz composer had almost forgotten about his middle school ball date, anyways, and he had started cheating on her in the most merciless manner.

At the beginning of the current yet almost finished academic year, he had started hitting perversely on Lola Martinez,[19:1] although they had barely got anything in common.

Fortunately, it became pretty soon obvious that Lola would have treated someone like Michael just like dirt.

Unfortunately — on the other hand — Michael Barret would never really care to learn from his mistakes of the past, and keep on making a monkey of himself just for a girl.

And now there was a new girl attracting Michael's attention: Vanessa Tayler, aforementioned member of the school's volleyball team, seemed to have contorted his brain to a significant degree.

But Michael was not really willing to fess up to her, although his crush had become pretty much evident for everyone with eyes to see, even more so than that of Chase for Zoey?

* * *

**19:2 Office Automation**

In my good old times, there were hardly any robots or other machines to make office life as comfortable as only possible. But these times had gone by ever since. Computers had made office work a lot easier, especially routine jobs.

Of course, the administration office of Pacific Coast Academy was using the latest versions of Pear's office software for word processing, spreadsheet calculation, database access, and presentation preparation.

This is not the time to complain again about Pear's unfair marketing campaigns concerning standard software for end users, though.

Quinn Pensky and her friends from the science club had been recently working on some different kind of office automation: A new quinnvention would allow Dean Rivers to perform all of his routines from his office chair without having to stand up or stretch his arms, but by just using his voice for commanding the ultimate office robot. Already during her eighth grade, Quinn had made a list iof things such a machine was supposed to be able to do. But only with the support of Melinda Crenshaw, Waybe Gilbert, and his henchmen was it possible for her to realise most of these possible tasks, and even to add a few more.

Mindy had already made up plans for properly marketing the office robots. As we had seen in the case of Zoey's backpacks, she had established very fast valuable business connections all over California, and even far beyond.

But the office of Dean Rivers was the first place to profit from this utterly wonderful quinnvention.

The machine was programmed to make coffee, complete with milk and sugar, to open and close all sorts of doors, windows, drawers … to pick up items like pencils and sheets, to scratch the back of the headmaster, to move around some pieces of furniture, and on and on and on it goes. The most interesting feature was that of feigning the sound of barking dogs, useful in order to scare away unwelcome visitors, especially the psychopathic wife of the headmaster, or Garth Berman dressed as a clown, or the guys from the tax office … you name them.

The first demonstration went pretty well, although Dean Rivers still needed to practise the usage of the machine. So there were a few glitches left, but those were mino — at least in comparison to those accidents during the testing phase: The machine had confused tea and coffee, doors and windows, dogs and cats, …. In the worst case, Mark Del Figgalo's face had been squirted with hot coffee, causing a squeal that made the whole campus vibrate. Quinn had been the one to conduct the whole presentation, and she announced to send the bill within the next few days by the way of electronic mail — which she had also integrated into the office machine.

* * *

**19:3 Otis**

* * *

**19:3:1 A Depressed Alpaca**

As aforementioned, Quinn Pensky had got quite a few pets, some of them even here on the campus. But this was of course only possible for the smaller ones, as completely opposed to her alpaca named **Otis**.[19:2] She had thus been forced to leave the wooly pet behind with her parents, in the outskirts and suburbs of Seattle.

But now there was a problem with this solution: Otis had started turning depressive, because Quinn had been absent from Seattle for most of the time, and she had even spent her last spring break in California, without any remorse. The depressions of the alpaca had been diagnosed and confirmed by veterinary surgeon **Dr. Venia Lang**,[19:3] who had been consulted by Quinn's mother Sherry.

Quinn was now going to suffer a lot from her remorses, and she needed to find a way to make up for this severe negligence. The best solution would have been of course the one of going to see Otis on site. But there was of course one big problem: The rules of Pacific Coast Academy did not allow for students to leave the campus without an explicit permission for a good reason and without the company of a responsible adult. This made it impossible to Quinn to visit Otis. Likewise, pets like Otis were not allowed on the campus, and it was by hardly any means possible to hide them like smaller pets. The reverse solution was thus deemed impossible as well.

* * *

**19:4 A New Home For Quinn's Alpaca**

* * *

**19:4:1 Wendy Gellar's Idea**

Zoë Brooks had already seen Megan Parker a lot of mammals, such as the obnoxious skunk. For that reason, she was wondering whether Megan was able to help Otis with the music of her oboe. She supposed that a good opera tune or so was able to relieve the alpaca's terrible depressions.

For that reason, Dustin Brooks had asked Wendy Gellar to talk Megan into doing something. "I will pay … at least five bucks!" He scratched his empty pockets. "Once I've got some …"

Wendy snickered mischievously. But then she supposed that there was even another way for Megan to help Quinn and her alpaca: "Megan knows a nice horse ranch not far from here."

Dustin's eyes went widely open, and he decided to report back to his sister.

The blond Mary Sue was pretty much pleased by the prospect of finding a suitable home for Otis, not far from the campus. She was curious and wanted to hear more details about that ranch.

So while Quinn was of course not allowed to leave the campus for several days right in the middle of a running academic term, she was allowed to leave it upon prior notification, with parental consent, and in the company of a responsible adult for a few hours on weekends and other days without scheduled classes.

* * *

**19:4:2 Faye Dunnaway**

There were not many places for horses to live in the greater Los Angeles area, but one suitable place for those was the horse ranch of **Faye Dunnaway**[19:4] near Malibu, which was surrounded by some old fashioned fence, not some barbed wire with additional electric shocks.

Megan Parker had discovered this ranch just a few months ago. She was in need of a place for two of her pets that were too large for the Parker Nichols residence: **Bawb the sheep** and **Zeboo the zebra**.[19:5] She was trying to use the sound of her oboe in order to train a variety of more or less wild animals, including apparently sheep and zebras.

Of course her evil and absolutely incompetent mother Audrey had never allowed her to keep the sheep, not even in the first place.

Megan had thus deployed quite some trickery in order to hide the presence of the animals form her parents, but — even more — she had fooled her worthless boobs Drake and Josh into taking care of Bawb, for otherwise the two unworthy guys would have been treated with even more pranks.

Unfortunately, Drake and Josh had failed miserably in their feeble attempts of keeping Bawb a secret. But at least they got punished correctly for their stupidity.

A bit later, Megan had hosted a zebra in the backyard garage of the residence of the Parkers and Nichols.

When Drake and Josh discovered her doing so, they were no longer willing to follow Megan's instructions.

But the cunning vixen had been able to manipulate them once again. She made the stupid boobs believe that those zebra stripes that are commonlyfound on pedestrians' crossings in the cities were raised on zebras. "Such an animal grows about a dozen of stripes each year. You will make quite some money by selling them to the traffic office of San Diego."

The foul step brothers were dumb enough to swallow Megan's explanation. Thence they started to hide, feed, and clean after the striped wild horse on a regular base. Unfortunately, they would soon have to learn that they just had believed in some of the greatest nonsense of the world. They had dragged the zebra downtown, next to some street that was very hard to cross for pedestrians, and they asked some bypassing old women to buy some stripes off them, allowing for a safe passage across the streets.

But bypassing policeman **Carl Michael**[19:6] was of a completely different opinion, and he arrested the two boobs for inappropriate public demeanour.

Megan had by then looked successfully for a safe place for Zeeboo on the interweb: The very farm of Faye Dunnaway.

This lady from the outskirts and suburbs of Los Angeles was hosting mainly horses for the celebrities of Hollywood fame, such as a talking pony[19:7] for a certain **Beeonsee**, some rock star making even more noise than Drake Parker.

The pony appeared to like pancakes, and it even appeared to sing about it.

The most noble stallion in the stables of Faye Dunnaway was one Winchester, a quite impressive black steed.[19:8]

Doctor Glazer had provided Megan with the necessary veterinary attestations for being allowed to station her mammals on Faye Dunnaway's ranch. Usually, he was a human medic, but he had often enough taken care of injured animals as well, not only of Bawb and Zeeboo. Unfortunately, he was not too often in Los Angeles, and thus he was not able to take over the task of the permanent medical supervision of Otis.

* * *

**19:5 Stable Relationship**

* * *

**19:5:1 Otis Moves To Malibu**

Megan Parker, Quinn Pensky, and science teacher Bert Beringer had finally reached the ranch of Faye Dunnaway.

The latter just served the girls as a responsible adult. He had volunteered for this task, because he would have preferred to work in a zoological garden anyways, and a horse ranch was something remotely similar to a zoo, wasn't it?

Upon hearing about the ways by which Megan had tried to beguile Drake and Josh into guarding the zebra, Zoë Brooks had fancied the idea of forcing Michael Barret, Chase Matthews, and Logan reese into doing something similar. "The creeps have totally deserved a lesson!" But — fortunately — she would not have to, as we will see below, because those guys were about to beguile themselves in an even more embarrassing manner.

It had not been really easy to organise the transport of Otis from Washington to California. A variety of vaccinations had been due, using a lot of terrible syringes. And while Dr. Venia Lang was certainly fairly skilled in providing those injections, she needed someone to calm down the alpaca, and neither Quinn's father nor her mother qualified here.

Quinn Pensky would have needed an alpaca whisperer in Seattle in order to perform that task, or at least someone like Megan with a suitable music instrument. Fortunately, there had been a person able to do so: Aforementioned Leanne Carter loved animals, and she was able to play the saxophone in a way that had definitely allowed her to keep Otis calm during the treatment.

Dr. Lang was also accompanying the alpaca in the transport truck. The container for Otis had to fulfill strict conditions, concerning for example width, height, length, humidity, temperature, and air pressure. In addition, Otis needed to be supplied with a sufficient amount of drinking water and of hay. The latter had to be from some well chosen meadows, resembling as closely as only possible the natural vegetation of the Peruvian pampas, the homelands of the wild Peruvian alpacas. That vehicle was driven by some well chosen expert for transport of race horses, chosen by Faye Dunnaway. It was of course impossible for Quinn to let just any arbitrary driver take care of the transport truck with her favourite mammal.

Finally, the truck had mnade its way to the entrance of the ranch. Doc Venia Lang guided the alpaca carefully down the slope.

Quinn hugged and smooched her Otis for several minutes, applauded wholeheartedly by Megan Parker.

Faye and Megan finally showed Quinn's alpaca to its new home: A stable that it was going to share with aforementioned Zeeboo.

* * *

**19:5:2 Veterinary Sparks**

Quinn gave a lot of instructions about Otis's favourite foods and drinks. "Don't forget to feed him fruits and vegetables from the southern American pampas and the highlands, especially avocados and Peruvian puff peppers."

Venia Lang explained that Quinn's alpaca was one of just a few kinds of mammals able to digest Peruvian puff peppers without running the risk of kidney failure and shrimpling lips.[19:9] Unfotunately this veterinary expert would have to return to Seattle, althougfh she had just lost its most important customer and patient: Otis. Well this was not wuite the case, as Quinn still had got an ostrich named Marvin that still lived in the state of Washington. "Mrs. Pensky can't even tell an ostrich from an alpaca, she is such a foolish creep!" But now she performed one last health check on Otis before returning to Washington.

Faye took carefully notes. She did not know exactly where to get those puff peppers from, as the latter were not legal for human cinsumption in California, and they could only be purchased with a special permission and declaration confirming their exclusive usage for feeding animals. "By the way, my veterinary medic is going to leave for the middle eastern world during the next weeks in order to treat the camels of the air force in the deserts and wastelands. He has been commanded there by some Commander Shay.[19:10]" She also announced that Doc Glazer would have to take care of the beasts on the ranch until a new veterinary expert would have been found. She wondered whether Lang was now willing to consider a move to the Los Angeles area.

**Stephan Shay** was the father of aforementioned Carlotta Shay, and a former friend of special agent David Alejandro Vega.

Indeed, Glazer Brooks arrived in this very moment in order to check Zeeboo. He was bound for the stable hosting both the zebra and the alpaca. Upon enbtering the log cabin, sparks were flying between Doc Glazer and Venia Lang.

Megan Parker whistle innocently when she left the two lovebirds behind with the hooved mammals.

The veterinary was now of course totally willing to come to southern California for a new job.

* * *

**19:6 Stupid Bet**

* * *

**19:6:1 Obsolete Letter**

During some unit of basketball training, Chase Matthews, Logan Reese, and Michael Barret got bored to no end.

Chase had failed miserably in some throwing exercise, and he was finally tired of hearing the letter _S_. He decided that it was better to cancel said letter from the alphabet.

Logan doubted that Chase was really able to avoid this.

Michael chimed in, thusly making it a bet of three.

The boys had thus promised to refrain from using the letter _S_ for as long as only possible, be in in their mutual concersation or anywhere else on the campus or in telephone messages. This was of course not an easy enterprise at all — for none of them.

But there was a particularly great problem for Michael Barret: The letter was still totally obsessed with Vanessa Tayler, but her name contained even two copies of the evil letters. In other words: The lovesick boy was not allowed to call his love by her name, and this would sooner or later make him go totally crazy.

Of course a bet was nothing without appropriate stakes — the three boys concluded that the loser, videlicet the boy using the forbidden letter first, was condemned to wearing some most embarrassing outfit and run across the campus at plain daylight.

This costume was composed of some loose tropical girls' dress and some alert light o top of the loser's head. Needless to say, there was nothing more humiliating in the minds of either of those boys.

* * *

**19:6:1:1 Breaking The Bet**

Of course the girls had sooner or later figured that rthere was something going amiss.

Nicole Bristow remarked in the girls's lounge that Logan Reese, Michael Barret, and Chase Matthews had started talking all of a sudden tottaly outlandish, and that she was hardly able to understand them.

Lola Martinez had got a cool idea in order to put an end to the bet. She wanted Logan Reese to lose the bet, because that jerk deserved the subesequent humiliation more than any other guy om the campus. For that reason, she called Logan on his mobile telephone, and she claimed to be a moderator of some game show. She made Logan believe that he had won the main prize, a trip to Hawaii. But she needed his name and his address in order to be able to send him the written confirmation and the tickets to the most dreamy island in the middle of the mighty pacific. Of course her plan was to get Logan to spell his family name, which contained the evil letter. And due to her convincing acting skills, she had been so close to succeding.

But Logan was lucky enough to spot Lola from afar. Whe n he saw her holding a mobile phone in her hands, he concluded correctly what was going on, and he dropped the connection mercilessly.

Dana Cruz had got some excessively subtle plan in order toput an end to the whole terror. "I will kick and punch their dirty kaws into microscopic smithereens. Then they will never be able to say anything containing the bad letter again."

Nicole shuddered. "Ouch! You can't do that to cute boys!"

Dana grunted: "Hey, you know that I can, and I will show you if …" She was close to punching Nicole's face hard.

Fortunately, the bimbo wench understood that the bully Latina meant business.

But Dustin had got another idea: "Wendy Gellar told us that Megan Parker had once pulled a terrible prank on Drake and Josh when they were stuck in a dumb bet."[19:11]

* * *

**19:6:2 The Bet Contract**

Upon Megan's recommendations, Zoë Brooks made Chase Matthews, Logan Reese, and Michael Barret sign some bet contract regulating the stakes.

The written document stated that he who gave up was forced to do all the stupid and humiliating things that the guys had already agreed on orally.

Just like Drake Parker and Joshua Nichols, the teenage boys from 148 Maxwell Hall were dumb enough to believe that only the first of them to use the evil letter would be forced by the written contract to go through the humiliation. But they were thoroughly misguided. Truth was that anyone breaking his promise to refrain from ever using said letter again by the way of whatever means of communication was obliged to dress as a loose tropical girl, to put an emergency lamp onto his head, and to cross this way the campus in the plain daylight when it was as full as can be, that is, to go through a gauntlet of uttermost humiliation. In other words: it did not matter at all in which order Chase Matthews , Michael Barret, and Logan Reese dared to pronounce the deadly letter, the cursed _S_, again. The result would ultimately be the same.

So, how did the guys wind up? They kept on taunting and provoking one another, just as they had done before the bet contract.

In order to make the whole contract look more official, aforementioned Claire Sawyer from Santa Clarita had formulated the details. Claire was an expert for all kinds of laws, and she was hell bent on going through Harvard Law School as soon as possible. Since her nursery school time, she had been sort of a shark representing her fellow pupils in legal troubles, such as conflicts with the school administration.

Jennifer Mosely had suggested Zoë Brooks to hire Claire for that sort of dirty business. She was secure in the knowledge that obstinate boys like Michael Barret, Chase Matthews, and Logan Reese needed to be taught a hard lesson.

This future lawyer from Santa Clarita had also taken a closer look at the situation of Kazu and Sushi Rox, and she came back with some shocking discoveries.

Kazu had made the kids of Pacific Coast Academy believe that the japanese pub had not been covered by a fire insurance, but this would have violated the local laws. According to some agreement struck way after my death, there was some obligatory fire insurance. This meant that either the pub owner must have lied to Zoey and her friends, or that some scandal had occurred, involving either Kazu or — as Claire believed — Pacific Sushi and the addministration of Pacific Coast Academy.

Stragely, Claire had also figured that aforementioned Joyce Lee, the most likely person to take over Sushi Rox, had been accused several times of insurance cheating, but she had never been convicted, due to the lack of proof. She wanted to check whether there was even a connection.

Evelyn Kwong was shocked by her aunt's possible involvement, but she was not really surprised. "Her first husband had died conveniently, allowing her to use his life insurance in order to expand Wok Star." For this and other reasons, she had not really trusted her.

So, regardless how the kids tried to fund the reconstruction of Sushi Rox, they would not just have to pay for it, but also for the obligatory life insurance. And the fees for the insurance would make it impossible to offer meals affordable for the students here — at least according to Evelyn's crude calculations.

Claire would take a closer look at the situation durinmg the summer break, but she advised the kids to refrain from funing the reconstruction of Japanese bar. for they would just reopen a whole can of works, if not for themselves, then at least for future Pacific Coast Academy students.

Zoey sighed deeply, as she and her friends would have a hard time doing without sushi. She still hoped for a happy end, but they better started making plans for establishing some3A alternative.

Claire Sawyer, Jennifer Mosely, and Lisa Zemo would — by the way — switch to Pacific Coast Academy for high school.

* * *

**19:6:3 The Outcome**

Finally, Vanessa Tayler crossed the campus, and she wondered whether Michael Barret was still interested in dating her. She had tried to approach him several times after she had been cheerleading for Michael and the other members of the basketball team, but she had never been given a reasonable answer. She was so close to being upset by Michael's outlandish talk in which she had not seen any sense so far.

And Michael was unable to resist his 'sweet Vanessa', thusly using the bad letter, and he did so right in front of hios two pals and competitors in the bet.

Logan Reese and Chase Matthews were totally pleased, and they expressed their joy about Michael's defeat in the most enthusiastical manner. While doing so, they slipped into using words containing the letter _S_ as well.

And this meant — according to the bet contract they had all agreed on — that Chase and Logan were also condemned to make total monkeys of themselves.

Of course the boys were not aware of this fact. But this was about to change pretty fast:

Some of the girls, such as Zoë Brooks, Lola Martinez, Maria Misa, Wendy Gellar, Lucy Senner, and of course Nicole Bristow, had recently observed the boys all over their campus, using camouflage techniques, in order to detect when the three useless guys used the bad letter.

And now it was Lola Martinez, hidden behind some shrub, to catch Chase matthews, Michael Barret, and Logan Reese in flagrante delicto. She did not hesitate any moment sending a message to Zoey, the head of the secret mission, telling her about the three culprits. Zoey had promised to arrive withing a minute, but Lola jumped up from her hideout and removed her campuflage. "No way! Haven't you read the bet contract that you have signed?" She explained that Logan and Chase were now as much forced to go through the whole horror trip as Michael.

"Lola? What the …" The useless boys looked aghast at each other. The actress explaine dthe whole stupid bet unto Vanessa Tayler.

Finally, Zoey and Nicole arrived, hand in hand, with a copy of the bet contract. They had already marked the important section with some phosphorescent ink.

Vanessa shook her head. She was disappointed because Michael had submitted himself to such a stupid bet. "OK, that's enough, I may find less weird guys about everywhere!" She walked away, leaving a consternated Michael Bartret behind.

Finally, Chase Matthews, Michael Barret, and Logan Reese had understood that they had been utterly stupid idiots, both for the bet and for not reading the contract well enough to see what was going on.

Logan suggested: "OK, now that we all messed it up badly … can't we simply … ignore the bet, as if nothing had happened?"

Chase and Michael nodded solemnly. "We're all for that!"

But Lola shook her head. "You bit it — you bought it!"

Nicole squealed "Yeah, excatly that!" Then she whispered carefully into Zoey's ears: "What does Lola mean with these words?"

Logan continued: "Come on … fifty bucks, and the whole bet will be forgotten!"Unfortunately, he was not really able to convince Lola and Zoey, as he could easily guess from their grimaces.

Chase, Michael, and finally also Logan tried to sneak away, but they were tripped up mby Dana Cruz.

The bully Latina grabbed the three miserable losers. "Hey, do you think you can get away like this?"

* * *

**19:6:4 Humiliated Boys**

Dana Cruz had tied up the boys in chains, while Zoë Brooks was about to redress the guys in the likeness of tropical wenches, and while Quinn Pensky was tying some green alert light to their heads.

The geek girl sighed. "I have to go to Faye's ranch now … I would have loved to see the guys on their gauntlet, but Otis needs me more." She shrugs.

Doc Glazer Brooks was already waiting, He was the responsible adult accompanying the geek queen off the campus.

Zoey nodded solemnly amd waved at her uncle. "Don't worry! Mindy Crenshaw will take pictures of the gauntlet of horror!"

Dana grinned sadistically. She would follow the guys across the campus and whip them into keeping on going, should the creeps ever try to hide or sneak away somewhere during their gauntlet of shame.

Quinn smiled and nodded solemnly before she disappeared from sighed. She was totally looking forward to seeing t he video of Chase, Logan, and Michael during their most embarrassing moment on the campus since the beginning of coeducation.

OK, two years had gone by since the great moment when Zoë Brooks and her female friends had boarded the campus of this illustrious boarding school for the very first time. During their first weeks, the boys, and especially Logan Reese, had not refrained from making it clear that the girls were considered citizens of second class on the campus. Understanding that this was indeed the plan of the board that had allowed girls to Pacific Coast Academy in the first place had made the girls feel totally humiliated, had been a shock for Zoey, and to a lesser extent all the other girls. But due to the unstoppable valour and smartness of Zoë Brooks, the girls had turned the gun around, and now it was time for the boys to feel the full weight of embarrassment and humiliation. Now now they made the boys pay dearly for that. Alas, they were not going to hurt the sponsors in this way. But they would sooner or later make the boys see that they too were abused by the system as a whole.

Dana hunted the dumb guys all over the place. "Now go back to your dormitory and redress properly!" She sighed for relief, as her dirty job was finally done.

Logan feigned being offended by Dana, but he enjoyed each and every slash from her whip. Alas, he was still too proud to admit to that, although he and Dana had made out in front of a bunch of people at plaib daylight just a few days ago. The pictures of these scenes had even made it into the première airing of _Gender Defenders_, and they got watched by a huge amount of students on the huge plasma screens in the lounges.

Chase Matthews, Michael Barret, and Logan Reese had finally completed their gauntlet, but had they really learned that the girls of Pacific Coast Academy were not their toys and tools, as they had always supposed them to be?

What goes around, comes around.

* * *

**19:6:5 Expanding The Market**

Quinn Pensky and her geek friends had successfully built the firast universal automated office machine for Dean Rivers. There had been a few problems, though, but the customer service provided by the nerds had been able to repair them, especially Mindy Crenshaw, and that was possible inspite of Quinn's depression. But the development and production of the office machine had swallowed a huge part of the annual budget of the club, and this needed to be justifiable for the sponsors funding the club.

In order to make up for the expenses was that of claiming a patent for the whole system and to market the invention successfully on a bigger market than just the administration office of Pacific Coast Academy, either by the sponsors or by our geeks.

During the summer breaks, there would be demonstrations on the campus for the headmasters of all schools in Los Angeles County.

But Mindy's contacts had reached a lot further, and thus even **Ms. Brandywine**, the principal of aforementioned Rocky Road, would by one of these miracles.

Would this business connections really be advantageous for Pacific Coast Academy and its scientists' club?

* * *

**Chapter 20 Stubborn Boys**

* * *

**20:1 Chicken Pox**

* * *

**20:1:1 The Health System Of PCA**

Of course kids at Pacific Coast Academy were able to fall sick, just like most kids in the world.

Spreading contagious diseases were a major concern at a school where many children lived together in dormitory halls.

For that reason, there had always been some rules and provisions for cases, especially epidemics like measles and chicken pox which were typical for children.

For example, health insurances were obligatory for all students at Pacific Coast Academy, including those living off the campus. Well, the school had got a contract with one of the sponsors that sold insurances of some sort, especially health insurances. All students had to buy one in order to get enrolled.

In addition, the parents enrolling their kids were forced to indicate all past and overcome children's diseases, along with known allergies and other medical conditions signifiacant for public health.

So — how was the medical service on the campus organised?

An infirmary has already been mentioned above, and you already know that the nurse was one perversely evil and disgusting fury.

But there was now a new nurse: **Shannon Holman**.[20:1]. She was much younger and nicer than the regular nurse, but only responsible for the elementary school kids, The others were still lost in hell.

Barring in the case of immediately urgent cases, such as accident treated by emergency medics, students in need of the medical service were required to show up at the infirmary. It was then up to the nurse to give the sick kid a pass for a hospital or a medic outside the campus, but this happened only in the case of diseases that were not supposed to be treated legally by a nurse.

Sometimes, a medic from outside Pacific Coast Academy was called ontp the campus in order to treat a sick student.

During my years as a student at Pacific Coast Academy, there was no nurse, but a retired medic from nearby **St. Schneider's Hospital**[20:2] was in charge with local medical services. This hospital was still the standard place for treating sick students that could not be cured in our infirmary.

* * *

**20:1:2 Dustin's Chicken Pox**

Now a new epidemic had hot Pacific Coast Academy's campus: Many kids were falling victims to chicken pox. It was of course not a really big thing for an indivual kid, but at a school with so many younger boys and girls, this was one capable of cauing severe interruptions of the schedules of education.

One of the victims of that disease was Dustin Brooks. In order to protect other boys of his dormitory block, he was now moved from his dormitory

Others had already overcome the disease earlier on, and there was thus no danger for them. These included especially Zoë Brooks and some of her friends, barring Michael Barret and Nicole Bristow.

Zoey had been subject to the chicken pox a few years ago, when Dustin was already a student at Pacific Coast Academy, whereas she had still lived at home. She remembered how she had been treated during that time by her uncle Glazer. Due to her situation, the blond Mary Sue was now allowed to visit her ill baby brother in his room in the infirmary.

Other vivtims of the disease had already been exported to aforementioned St. Schneider's Hospital, where they would be treated by Dr. Nussbaum, the previously introduced crush of Nicole Bristow.

The ditzy wench was already considering seriously to catch the virus of that disease.

But Zoë was careful enough to prevent her best friend from getting too close from her poor little brother. She looked after Dustin on a daily base, rihjt after the classes. She had heard that both Henry Nolston and Jacob Ross had already been exposed to chicken pox.

This meant that Dustin was basically allowed to return to his own dormitory room instead of having to stay in the infirmary which was still controlled by the evil monster. But he did not really want to return at all from this place, which must have surprised Zoë.

Nevertheless, the blond Mary Sue did not have too many difficulties in figuring the reasons for Dustin's preference:

Of course it was Shannon Holman who had made the difference.

Zoey had not even been aware of the fact that there was now a second nurse.

Dustin begged his sister to take a picture of him and Shannon with her camera that was built into her Pear phone.

Zoey grinned, and she fulfilled her brother's wish. She wondered whom to send the picture to, but Dustin did not really care. Zoey wondered whether Dustin was seriously into the young nurse.

**_"_**  
Yes, this would be really weird.

Dustin is only eleven years old.

Shannon is maybe twenty-five or so, and thus definitely too old for my brother, ain't she?

Of course, Dustin may just see her as a nice nurse, but what if it is not the case?

And the way he looks at her and talks about her tells me that he has got quite some crush on Shannon Holman.

It is unlikely that the nurse has a crush on is possibly already married or engaged to some real man.

Dustin has already been disappointed by several girls since my arrival at this school: Wendy Gellar, Ashley Blake, Jennifer Mosely, Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett …

And then the catastrophe with Sandy Baldwin, which was my fault.

I can't be everywhere in order to keep him away from the bad girls, but I can't fool him into dating the good ones.

If Dustin does not see any longer a reason to trust me, he will never trustany girl.

I don't want to be guilty of that. I love him too much for that.

Yet if I don't do anything, chances are huge that she will break his heart into smithereens, even worse than Samantha Puckett did.

**_"_**

At least it seemed inevitable for the blond Mary Sue to talk a few serious words to the new nurse, although it would be hard to save Dustin from a disappointment, anyways.

* * *

**20:2 Squirrel Tree**

* * *

**20:2:1 The Problem With Te Girls' Rooftop**

The teenagers loved spending the spring afternoons on the top of their dormitory's roof.

Unfortunately, only the roof of the boys' dormitory hall was suitable for such a task. It was not bigger than the girls, but it was not adjacent to a certain tree.

Said huge plant was standing close to Brenner Hall, and its shadow used to cover the girls' roof during the late afternoons of the Californian spring. In addition, the tree was inhabitated by aforementioned giant squirrels.

Dana Cruz was certainly not afraid of those beasts, and she would have loved kicking some of them to goo.

But Nicole Bristow thought that squirrels were cute, although she would have screamed herself into pieces when approached by one.

The squirrels were certainly able to bit and hurt kids badly when doing so, but this was not the main problem. They did not just live in the tree, they also left their excrements up there. And the penetrant odor of the latter was blown across the roof by landward winds that used to prevail in the late afternoon hours.

Unfortunately, the boys were no longer willing to grant the girls access to their roof, and this was a catastrophe.

The ringleader of this perversity was of course once more no other than Logan Reese. He claimed that the presence of girls would make it impossible for boys to be themselves.

Unfortunately, his slave Chase Matthews had started to believe that crap as well, after having been brainwashed by the jerk of Beverly Hills. He had also been evil enough to throw Lola's not so unexpensive boom box down from the roof, making it burst into smithereens. That was by absolutely no means a nice deed committed by the bushy dweeb.

Michael Barret appeared to have behaved neutral — at least so far.

But there was no way to be sure about it, because the three boys had been severely humiliated after the stupid bet invoilving the dreaded letter _S_.

* * *

**20:2:2 Possible Solutions**

Zoë had gathered her mates in the lounge of Brenner Hall in order to discuss possibilities in order to get access to the boys' roof. What she really wanted —however — was a way to force the guys to see that theur poor excuses for denying girls was plain stupid.

Dana Cruz suggested plainly to chop off the tree that caused all the problems. "No squirrels, no shadow, no stench!" She even offered to do that with her own hands and feet.

Nobody in the lounge dared to claim that Dana was not able to do so.

But of course cutting down a tree on the campus required the explicit permission of Dean Rivers, if not of Overlord Bardford and the board of sponsors.

Unfortunately, the kind of trees — or so explained Melinda Crenshaw — were subject to the Californian law for protection of endangered species.

Granted, Dean Rivers was probably not aware of that, and he was definitely no such thing as a tree hugger, but there had already been a few protests by environmental activists during the last years.

The school could not afford an environemntal scandal.

**Edward Backly**[20:3] was one of the ringleaders of the Californian environementalist activist legion, and he was still a popular actor at Hollywood who had starred in many a movie, especially some produced by Malcolm Reese.

In other words, disposing with the tree would have angered one of the greatest sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy, and there was no way the students would have been forgive such a brute force action.

Maria Misa suggested to negotiate with the boys. Like many other girls, she was convinced that the lounge of Brenner Hall was the most modern and comfortable one on the whole campus, and — as a result — was pretty much coveted by the boys.

Zoey liked the concept of trading, although it was indeed more of a blackmailing than of a fair deal: The boys would have been denied access to the lounge of Brenner Hall, unless they had granted the ngirls access to the roof of Maxwell Hall.

Nicole Bristow was definitely too naïve to think about the fairness of deals, but she protested as vigorously as can be to the idea of excluding oys from the lounge of Brenner Hall. She was still totally obvsessed with cute boys, and she was unable to bear spending time in lounge devoid of that kind of guys.

Zoey sighed deeply. She was not really willing to exclude boys from her lounge, either, for most of them did not have anything at all to do with Logan's jerkish attitude. She would also exclude her own brother from visiting her right here, and thus alienate him more and more without a good reason.

Lola Martinez had got another idea: "Hey, one of us could sneak into the boys' building, disguised as a boy, and live with them for a weekend. They will learn that we are not really different, after all." She had already sugegsted crossdressing for the trip to Santa Barabara in order to balance the number of boys and girls.

Zoey sighed. "So I guess that you want to be that one undercover agent?"

Lola nodded solemnly. "I am the perfect actress, and this is the perfect rôle for me. No Hollywood producer would ver dare to skip me again."

Zoey smiled. "That sounds reasonable, at least better than last time."

Nicole smiled, because she saw the chance of remodelling Lola's face, an occasion she would have liked to have earlier already.

Quinn Pensky thought about the technological possibilities. "We have to equip Lola with a microchip for wireless connection, allowing us to see whatever she sees, to hear whatever she hears, and to talk to her and vice versa."

Evelyn Kwong grinned. "I saw that in an espionage movie."

Quinn nodded solemnly. "Yeah, it is a standard technology. But it has to be done carefully."

Lola declared, "I want to be called _Steve_ … as a boy, that is!"

Nicole sighed. "Why is it so?"

Mindy Crenshaw growled, "I only know one Steve … **Stephan Shay Jr.**, better known as _Crazy Steve_."

This Steve was a psychopath working at Helen Baxter's cinema in San Diego, side by side with Joshua Nichols.

Lola choked. "Hey! I am not crazy!"

* * *

**20:2:3 Ashley As An Alternative For Lola**

In order to sneak a crossdressed Lola into the boys' dormitory hall, it was necessary to create a free spot in one of the dormitory rooms.

Zoë Brooks imagined that Michael Barret would be easiest to persuade into leaving his dorm for a few days. Showing him the picture of Shannon Holman would probably have even made him pretend to be sick, just i order to get treated in the infirmary by Shannon Holman, the hot nurse.

Michael had recently been trashed by aformentioned Vanessa Tayler, and he was not yet over with it. As Chase and Michael had made fun of him — over and over again, he was probably looking forward for a way to pay it all back, anyways.

On the other hand, Logan was always there when it came down to hot girls, and the new nurse was certainly as good for him as any high school girl.

In any case, it would be necessary to fake the signature of the school administration in order to get a fake boy portrayed by Lola Martinez into 148 Maxwell Hall.

Quinn Pensky had offered them to use her fake printer, running off the new Pear Printer Driver, in order to emulate Dean Rivers's signature.

This would of course have been illegal, but Zoey would not have minded that little cheat, had she not gone through the troubles with money counterfakers during the recent spring break.

But Mindy Crenshaw wondered, "your brother is still in the infirmary?" She had heard about the wave of chicken pox from Wendy Gellar.

Zoeë Brooks confirmed thus. "Chicken pox … not nice, but he will soon be through it." Alas, she knew very well that he would not be easily over an almost ineviatble heartbreak.

Mindy continued: "So why not use the spot that is now empty in your brother's formitory room?"

Lola's eyes almost bugged out. "What? I don;t want to share a room with elementary school boys! They are all crazy!"

Zoey looked at her second best friend.

Mindy shook her head. "Ashley Blake could do that. She is the same age as Dustin and his pals."

Lola growled: "Oh, yeah, certainly …" Alas, she was disappointed because she would miss out on yet another chance for some great acting practice, the biggest since feigning to be in love with a dweeb named Chase Matthews."

Zoey sighed deeply. She knew that, regardless of whether Ashley Blake fooled two middle school guys, or whether Lola Martinez did the same to two high school guys, the outcome was still the same:

The boys would maybe have allowed girls to their roof tops.

But the more girls used that possibility, the more crowded the boys' roof tops would become. After all, they would cease being a good space to hang out and to relax after classes or during weekends.

It would have been a lot better making the roof top of Brenner Hall a place where the girls wanted to be, rather than to force boys into sharing their place against their will.

But if destroying the tree was no option, what would do the trick?

* * *

**20:2:4 Redirecting Light And Squirrels**

Foortunately Quinn Pensky had got a totally different idea. "The two problems caused for the top of our roof caused by the tree are the shadow and the squirrel excrements."

Lola and Zoë nodded vigorouly.

Dana growled: "yeah, we know that, nerd! Anything new?"

Quinn continued: "I think it is possible to solve both of them … without having to chop off the tree!"

Dana Cruz grunted" "Lame! If there's a problem in my way, I smash and shatter it into smithereens, I don't work around it!" Due to Megan's intervention involving the sound of the oboe, she was no longer threatening to obliterate humans with her blank fist, but trees were still a different issue altogether.

Inspite of the ignorance of most of the other girls, Quinn did not give up, and she fainally noticed some of her fellow students agreeing with her.

**_"_**  
In order to solve the shadow problem, we have to redirect the sunlight to our roof.

There are several devices for doing so: Mirrors, fibre cables, lenses.

We just have to position appropriately formed devices in a well calculated manner in front of the tree. Then we need to take care of bundling the light in the correct manner.

It is necessary to consider a variety of factors: frequency, polarisation, intensity …

Making a mistake here could potentially fry an unwary visitor like a microwave stove!

**_"_**

Dana sighed deeply. In formwer times, she would have enjoyed getting Nicole or Quinn fried to a crisp. But these times were over.

The ditzy wench squealed: "Ouch! Crisps are not cute!"

Quinn continued her explanations:

**_"_**  
Let me continue.

The squirrels may be redirected as well.

There are several ways to achieve that:

Squirrels have got very sensitive noses.

This enables me to use chemicals in order to lure them over to some other place, just as I had tried with the skunk.

Yes, I know, this has not worked out well.

But even if we get some of the squirrels to look for another place, the stench will reduce the stink significantly.

I have thought about adding some essence to the tree that does not smell for … **most** humans.

But it repels most rodents for a few hundred yards.

**_"_**

Indeed, Quinn Pensky knew one person able to smell a lot of odors that are not bothering normal people: **Nevel Amadeus Papperman** from Seattle.[20:4]

Unfortunately, for someone like Dana Cruz, just reducing the stink was not enough.

Zoë Brooks intervened as well. "OK, I understand that you want to distract the rodents in order to look for some other place to breed and feed, a place that is not the tree next to our roof top."

Quinn nodded solemnly.

Zoey wondered" "Megan Parker is able to use her oboe in order to beguile wild and ferocious animals of all sorts. Why should she nopt able to talk squirrels into doing so?"

Quinn nodded solemnly. "Yeah, if she really can do that …" She poanted heavily. "But she would have to do that over and over again, because the squirrels will always come back to their old tree unless they find a better place fro breeding and feeding elsewhere."

Zoey looked a bit puzzled. "But it is at least a temporary soplution, isn't it?"

Quinn sighed deeply. "OK, it sounds like the best thing you may do for a temporary relief."

But now the girls wanted to achieve more in this way.

Lola requested: "The squirrels should not just avoid our roof, they should pounce upon the boy's roof!"

A bunch of girls saw it the same way.

"Let them feel how it is to live with rodent pee as we have had to until now!" argued Dana Cruz.

Zoë Brooks grinned viciously. "Those creeps totally deserve that!" And there was no doubt she would be able to persuade Megan into lending them the sou nd of her oboe for such a project.

* * *

**20:2:5 Replanting An Old Tree**

And Quinn Pensky had found another possible way for fixing the problem.

While environmentalists like Edward Backly and Leanne Carter were vigorously opposed to simply cutting down rare trees, they were not necessarily opposed to replanting them, especially if they were targetted for some soul more suitable for them than the one in which they were standing now.

Quinn had done some research, starting with requesting information from Miss Seattle alias Leanne Carter. Then she figured that there had already been technologies for an environment friendly uprooting for certain kinds of trees in certain areas of the world.

But uprooting and replanting a tree safely is not an easy task, especially not in the case of big and old trees such as the one next to Brenner Hall.

The appropriate place for planting a tree was probably the school's botanical garden.

Quinn Pensky had already figured a few weeks ago that Eric Blonowitz was a great expert for botanics.

Back then, they had been talking especially about her plans for the banapple project.

Eric seemed to be more of a specialist for rare plants than Mindy and Quinn were altogether.

* * *

**20:3 Doc Nussbaum Intervenes**

* * *

**20:3:1 Contracting The Chicken Pox**

Nicole Bristow had successfully contracted the chicken pox. She had secretly followed her best friend into the infirmary, and then she had cuddled Dustin fondly, pretending that she had been missing him so much.

Zoey looked consternated. "Nicole? Haven't you told me that you haven't yet got the chicken pox?" She moaned. "It's great that you are missing Dustin, but you will now probably go the same painful way."

Nicole went "oops", hiding cleverly the fact that this had been the very purpose of her action.

Unfortunately, the old and evil nurse was now responsible for Nicole.

But the bimbo wench was able to go through the torture, secure in the knowledge that the infirmary had to contact St. Schneider's hospital, because Nicole Bristow had gotb a lot of carefully attested allergies to all sorts of standard medications. This way, she would soon face her crush Dr. Nussbaum once again.

Zoey sometimes wondered whether those medical conditions had turned the wench from Kansas into such a horrible mess.

* * *

**20:3:2 Two Broken Hearts**

Due to the particular medical records, the perverse nurse was actually forced to call for the hospital.

And the responsible chief resident of said medical institution had immediately sent Dr. Nussbaum, an expert for allergies typical for the popularion of Kansas, over to the infirmary.

It was not yet clear whether Nicole was going to stay here.

The door went open, and the young medic walked in. "Nicole?"

Both the evil nurse and Zoey wondered why the medic and the bimbo were familiar with each other.

Nicole complained: "Dockie Nussbaum! It itches everywhere. Here! There! My back! My chest! My hips! Would you please rub my skin? But you have to be very careful!"

Nussbaum shook his head. "You better come with me immediately."

Nicole smiled. "Wherever you want, cutie!" She blushed like a tomato and beamed like a light bulb at the same time.

Nussbaum also checked Dustin while he was here. "Oops, this seems to be a particularly tough case. I better take him to St. Schneider's pediatry as well."

Dustin looked agahast at his sister.

Zoë Brooks sighed deeply. "Sorry, if he says so, he's the expert." She was nopw forced to prepare some luggage, both for Nicole and Dustin.

The dragon nurse had already sent her nice colleague Shannon to the school's administration in order to fetch the necessary documents for the health insurance of the students.

Finally, Shannon Holman returned to the infirmary.

Zoey was done getting Dustin and Nicole tucked away safely into Nussbaum's medic car.

Nussbaum saw Shannon come in, and he walked immediately up to her, wrapped his arms around her, and he pulled her into a vigorous kiss.

Zoey looiked consternated. "The two of them are a couple?"

Of course, both for Dustin and for Nicole, a world seemed to break into smithereens.

And making things worse: Shannon would accompany Nussbaum to St. Schneider's in order to talk to the hospital administration about the details.

Zoey grunted: "This is mental torture for Dustin and for Nicole. They have not deserved being forced to watch their respective secret cruhes making out with each otrher." But was there something she could do about it?

* * *

**20:4 Uprooted**

* * *

**20:4:1 Treehuggers**

Quinn's idea of uprooting and replanting the old and giant tree — the one had hitherto prevented the root of Brenner Hall from becoming a joyful place for the girls trying to enjoy some rest after the classes — had finally been accepted — albeit reluctantly — by the school's administration.

Dean Rivers had enjoyed his improved and upgraded offoce furrniture, and thus he had happily granted the permit for the complicated operation, although he would still need the approval of the board, and maybe even of the overlord in person.

But of course it was necessary to make a detailed plan for the procedure, along with a schedule.

Quinn Pensky had called Eric Blonowitz for the rescue.

It was the Saturday of the last weekend before the very end of the academic year, and the red hot sun was already scorching the campus square, although the occasional gust of landward winds helped the students to feel less of the merciless heat.

Eric Blonowitz had not arrived all alone, but he was accompanied by his friend Drake Parker.

And little daredevil Megan had snuck once more into the back of Drake's car in order to see her friends again.

Nicole Bristow had come her long way since the first arrival of the teenage rock star on the campus. She was now a lot calmer, but still friendly. She had recovered both from the broken heart and from her chicken pox in less than one week.

Drake had expected her to fall straight into his arms again, but he was somewhat disappointed, and he believed that he had lost some of his natural charm that made him irresistable for girls.

Wendy Gellar helped Megan once more out of her car after this trip as a blind passenger. "Next year, you will be here regularly." She smiled in anticipation.

Megan greeted her best friend, and she also hugged Nicole. "Congratulation, you have learned to control yourself!" She grinned mischievously at her elder brother.

After she had started listening to Megan Parker's magical oboe, she had stopped hankering after several boys at the same time. First, she had concentrated on Doc Nussbaum, but this had been a mistake. Now there was no longer a reason for talking the bimbo off the hallowed grounds of Pacific Coast Academy. And Nicole had already found a bpyfriend that was totally in her leaguie: She had given Nicholas Webber, her middle school ball date from the previous academic year, yet another chance.

Nicholas had gone through the same problems as Nicole during the last year, and after hearing about the great skills with which Megan had treated Nicole, he had consulted his freind Nils Jacobsen, asking for a similar favour.

The fiddler had agreed, and by adapting Megan's composition for the violin, Nils had pulled Nicholas out of the swamp and saved from an otherwise inevitable expulsion.

Megan was now ready to walk away with Wendy. The two of them had to talk about all the things they were up to doing during the next academic year, as fellow students at Pacific Coast Academy Middle School.

Lola saw Drake approaching, and her eyes bugged out. She had coveted Zoey, Nicole, and Dana to no end, because those girls had been able to attend a whole concert of this exceptional pop rock talent on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy during last year's spring fling. But she had not been a student at Pacific Coast Academy back then, and thus she had nnissed out on it. In additionm she had missed a few occasions to meet then rock start during the almost finished current academic year, such as during the spring break where she had been away on the Reese estate in Santa Barbara County. This was now almost her last opportunity for talking a word to him.

In the mean time, Quinn Pensky and Evelyn Kwong greeted their fellow nerd, ready for examining the soil and the position of the tree more closely.

Chase Matthews picked up Drake. "Hi! Would you like to sing a stanza … or haldf of it … in our web show?"

Drake scratched his head. "I guess itwill take the nerds a bit to do what nerds do with a tree." He shrugged carelessly. "So, this should be OK!"

Lola had been walking closely behind Chase, and now she beamed. "hi Drake," squealed the drama Queen.

Drake looked at Lola. "Hey! I have seen you a few timnes in television shows … or commercials? You are Tori Vega, right?"

Lola nodded. "That's true, I am an actress, but most people call me Lola right now … long story!" Her eyes inflated to heart-shaped balloons while she was talking to the rock idol.

Drake started blushing as well.

But now Trisha Kirby alias Samantha Puckett showed up, and she grabbed Lola's elbow. "Hey Lo, this is yiur chance!" She glared at Eric Blonowitz.

Lola span around. "Trisha, what do you mean?"

Trisha explained: "You want to practise flirting with unattractive guys …" She panted heavily. "And this Dorkowitz is as unattractive as can be, so … and he has got no friends at Pacific Coast Academy to …"

Lola choked. "Really? Is that such a good idea … right now?" She fearerd missing out on Drake.

Trisha nodded. "Come on! The web esession won't start without me," explained the bad lass from Seattle, "just lure Eric toi the flowers in the school garden."

Lola was still a bit excited. But as an actress, she knew that she needed to get over it. She moved slowly towards Eric.

Chase asked Trisha whether she wanted to co-moderate the impending web session.

The bad lass nodded. "But I will be a little bit late!"

Chase shrugged. "No problem, I will show Drake around the web studio."

Trisha nodded. Then she snuck up to Lola, whispering: "I will follow you secretely, like an invisible ninja … just in case!"

Lola nodded slowly, but then she dared to address Eric Blonowitz. "Hi, Nerdowitz, you know a lot about garden plants, right?"

Eric nodded solemnly. "Sure!"

Lola sighed. "A few days ago, I was in the school's botanic garden, and I found flower taht I've never seen before … can't you tell me what it is?"

Eric grinned. "Aw, sure, show me the way!"

Lola smiled into Trisha's direction. Then she grabbed Eric. "Follow me!" Quinn gasped. "OK, be back in a quarter!" She shrugged and continued studying and measuring the soil. So far, she was content with the results, and due to the help of Eric , she would be able to replant the old tree across the campus into the botanic garden of the school during the next academic year.

Until then, some oboe music by Megan Parker would do the trick.

The academic year was over, and Zoë Brooks wondered whether her possible relocation to Paris would be tantamount to an uprooted and replanted tree. The decision was still pending, though.

* * *

**20:4:2 About The Fish In The Lake**

Chase and Michael were back to their dormitory room, ready to start the last session of their web show for the terminating academic year.

Wayne had checked once more the accoustics of the dormitory room and the microphone. "It's OK!'

Trisha and Lola were just about to return from the campus square.

Chase announced the guest star: Drake Parker.

Trisha grabbed some device invented by Quinn Pensky, and she triggered some artificial applause. "OK, I am a bit late. So what? Lola has just tried to flirt with some ugly nerd in the school garden … no, not Wayne …" She triggered a button in order to cause some disgustiong noise. "I had to buy her some mint blix in order to clean her mouth, because she had to throw up afterwards!"

Lola Martinez was still a bit pale, but she recovered incredibly fast in the vicinity of Drake Parker.

Drake sat down on some stool, and then he announced something important.

**_"_**  
Many of you know my new song _Hollywood Girl_.[20:5]

Sorry, I am not going to sing it for you.

When Adelaide Singer was writing the lyrics for it, she did not think of a particular girl.

I would not have had any special girl in mind, for — as you all know— I am too much of an unfocused womeniser. Sorry!

But now I know whom the song is really about, has always been, will always be:

This is Tori Vega, or, aas you might know her, Lola Martinez.

Now I know that she is **my** Hollywood girl!

The next song is just for her.  
**_"_**

Chase, Michael, and Samantha applauded.

Lola sat down on Drake's lap and snuggled tenderly closer and closer to him.

Nevertheless, Drake was still able to take his guitar and to start playing it, in order to sing some cuddle song.

**_"_**  
Gonna sing about the fish in the lake  
Beneath Lola and Drake  
Fluffy things they shall do  
A whole spring night through[20:6]  
**_"_**

Lola purred contentedly, seeing that one of her greatest dreams had just come true.

Drake bowed to the web cam.

Trisha activated the fake applause at top volume.

Chase wondered: "Is there any time left for a superhero toon? Today: _Superchase Takes On Oz_?"

But everone was concentrating on Lola and Drake.

Even Fire Wire did not deem it a good idea. "Evelyn is already waiting for me!"

Michael nodded. "Girls may get upset if you let them wait!"

So, this marked the end of the second academic year of coeducation at Pacific Coast Academy. But things would change even more.

* * *

**Chapter 21 A Summer Of Storms**

* * *

**21:1 Through The Summer Break**

* * *

**21:1:1 Zoë Brooks**

During the last year, Zoey Brooks had been put under pressure by the approaching deadline for her decision whether to move to France for the exchange programme or not.

Her parents had tried to avoid pushing her too, although they saw a great chance in it.

Zoey would have really preferred to let the offer remain a secret to her friends at Pacific Coast Academy — until she had made up her mind for sure. This way, she would have avoided to cause turmoil and mayhem that would have been unnecessaru if her ultimate decision had been against Meudon. Alas, the visit of Monique Chaumont had eliminated this strategy of hers. Ever since, Zoey had been repeatedly bothered and even stalked by her friends who needed to know desperately whether she was about to leave them alone or not.

Under this pressure, the blond Mary Sue had used the summer break in order to make the ultimate decision, and to inform her waiting pals right upon her return to the campus for the fall term.

Zoey had once more taken up a summer job as a bay watch. And while watching the raging waves of the mighty pacific, she had come to the conclusion to move to Meudon after her sophomore year. "Just as a surfer needs to face bigger and bigger waves, I need a new challenge in order to be able to increase my creativity." And Meudon Prep was definitely a challenge she had been watching out for.

Dustin's feelings had been mixed, so he was not really a great help for her.

There was now one whole year left to round up her whole life at Pacific Coast Academy and to get her friends preopared for the time after her departure. But Zoey was still not sure how to tell them. She knew that everyone would take the news in a different way, and that some of them would go crazy about it. And what would Zoë Brooks want to achieve while she was still at Pacific Coast Academy?

Chase Matthews had not achieved admitting to his feelings, and his clumsy attempts, involving the semi-voluntary usage of Triusha Kirby and of Lola Martinez in order to make her jealous, had confirmed her suspicion that the bushy dork saw nothing in her but a toy to play with. Even after the disastroous bad had Chase not showed much of an improvement. Zoey would not want to watch this absurdity forever, and she would not want to leave for Paris without having forced Chase to give a thorough and credible explanation.

* * *

**21:1:2 Nicole**

Very much like Zoey's other friends, Nicole Bristow was anxiously awaiting the end of summer and the final decision about her switch to Paris. Somehow, she envied her room mate and best friend for this chance. She knew that Paris was a great place for shopping. Before Megan's intervention, she would have added that Paris was full of cute boys.

Dr. Nussbaum was awfully sorry for having hurt the ditzy neighbour girl's feelings, but he never had seen her as anything but a funny girl from the same area. But he still invited Nicole for his impending wedding with Shannon Holman. Of course, Nicole was over the whole terror cause by her crush on Nussbaum once she had started dating Nicholas Webber, but this had not made her any smarter.

So, did she have any new plans and resolutions for the impending academic year? Clearly she had been confirme din her ambitions as a former beauty artist, especially one specialised in hair styling and mask building.

* * *

**21:1:3 Dana**

Dana Cruz was well aware of the fact that she had escaped only barely from expulsion and deportation for repreated bullying.

But this had not changed her ambition as a martial artist, let alone a cheerleader and top model. She knew, however, that she was now exposed to a larger competition, because the amount of girls at Pacific Coast Academy was rapidly increasing.

Her relationship with Logan Reese was still a very rough one, and many thought that already the summer break would put an end to it. At least that was the reason why Malcolm Rees had not done anything to stop it: He knew about Logan's promiscuity, and he had never seen any way to stop it. But had he been any better as a teenager? Hell, was he any better nowadays? Having been divorced for over half a dozen of times and spent most of the wealth of the family into this was not exactly a good example for his son.

Anyways, Dana did not want to become known to the general public as someone's girlfriend, even if it was a heir of the Reese imperium, but because of her achievements as an athlete or a model. She had steadily increased her ambitions, and now she planning towards a new goal: Becioming one of a few professional female football players. But the prejudices against girls in the tough athletic disciplines were still hard to overcome. This did not mean that Dana would give up. Her argument was that only someone able to play the game of football and knowing from his or her own experiences what it meant to torture yourself for a spot in the team, would be able to motivate a bunch of football players appropriately.

* * *

**21:1:4 Quinn**

The previous year had seen Quinn getting accepted into the stingray scientists' club and won a prize with it. The club had been sponsored and equipped essentially by Pear Electronics, but Quinn Pensky had turned increasingly suspicious of the reasoning of that company. Thus she tried to develop her own operational system, against the will of Pear. She had even got the support of Wayne Gilbert, something which was not a given and rather unexpected afyer her firast year at Pacific Coast Academy.

The same was valid for her reasearch in the field of creating new flavours of Blix soft drinks. She had believed that she had been contributing against the hunger in the world, but she had faced a lot of obstructions imposed by the commercial interests of the sponsor. She was in particular worried about the usage of sweeteners in Blix's drinks, as will be seen below.

Her cooperation wqith Mindy Crenshaw concerning the construction of a new power plant able to supply the whole campus with enough electricity to allow for demands like on the first day of the previous academic year was still in progress, but it was accelerated largeley by Mindy's feelings for Cal Meacham — and vice versa. Quinn wanted to win the national science fair with this project, and she had done a lot during the summer break in order to achieve this goal. But she was worried about the possibility nof her and Mindy turning into rivals again as soon as the sponsors reduced their generosity.

* * *

**21:1:5 Lola**

Having turned almost over night into the girlfriend of popular teenage rock star had been one of the greatest adventure in the life of the young Latina drama queen.

But did that mean anything for girls like Lola Martinez and for lads like Drake Parker?

During the summer break, Lola had been offered several minor rôles in movies by various producers, not just by Malcolm Reese. And she was also close to gettibg an offer from the hands of one of the greatest competitors of Malcolm Reese:

**Dingo Trust** had offered Lola auditions for the main rôle of a new teenage sitcom named _Totally Terry_.[21:1] This show featured a teenage girl that moves to a new state and becomes a superstar. After having only portrayed minor characters and in short movies, this would certainly have been her breakthrough.

And indeed, Lola owed this offer to nothing but the publicity she had gained by means of her relationship with Drake Parker. Jeremiah Trottman had not only published pictures about one of their first kisses on the campus in _Daily Stingray_, but he had also sold that information for an insane amount of bucks to _Backstage Hollywood_,[21:2] _a reality show spreading interviews with and rumours about the Hollywood scene and its stars_. Ever since, Lola had been surrounded by a swarm of paparazzi, especially **Jessica Warner**,[21:3] the star reporter of aforementioned reality show.

According to Lola's parents, everything went too fast now, and they wanted her to slow down a bit. But this was not the way Hollywood worked: If you had a chance, you needed to grab it as fast and as stronly as possible, or else you would have disappeared again in the grey mists of anonymity.

* * *

**21:2 New Students**

* * *

**21:2:1 Stacey Dillsen**

One of the new students at Pacific Coast Academy for this term was **Stacey Dillsen**, a girl speaking with a penetrant lisp. She was originally from Swampscott in Massachusetts. She was most interested in woodshop and wanted to join her father's carpenter's workshop, but the latter was against this. For that avail, she had started a different and less dangerous yet similar hobby: She was excruciatingly gifted in building detailed models of machines and constructions from cotton swabs.

This did not make much of a difference, though, for Stacey wiuld be content with a career in any kind of sculpting art or craft with art-related possibilities.

Another most important hobby for the unpopular girl was watching the stars, and she had got a telescope which she almost considered as her best friend.

Unfortunately, the ignoble mass of students appeared to be annoyed by Stacey, and this was especially valid for Logan Reese, Dana Cruz, and other deprecable jerks of the worst sort. This made her above choice of a best friend more and more understandable.

Stacey was also interested in acrobatoics, especially hatha yoga related exercises. Unfortunately, she was not very careful in following the related instructions, and thus she often ended up with knotted limbs. She had always been quite accident-prone in general. It was unlikely for her to make it to her room without getting scratched and bruised upon every other step.

* * *

**21:2:2 Megan Parker**

Drake Parker's little sister had already been on the campus for quite a few times. And upon almost each of her vistits, she had caused some turmoil, but also saved someone's problems with her beguiling and cunning musical skills like a _deus ex machina_. She had done nothing less than restored peace to the campus by calming diown the masses that had been overheated by the senseless and stupid disputes between Logan Reese and Zoey Brooks durin g Chase's and Michael's web show.

Audrey had allowed her to switch to Pacific Coast Academy for middle school, inspite of not being totally convinced. But she had been persuaded by the scholarship for the school's orchestra granted by Dean Carl Rivers and the board.

But what plans had the cunning vixen got on store for her life and time on the hallowed grounds of Pacific Coast Academy? She had been called by Dean Rivers upon the chaos ruling the activities on the campus, but this did not mean the Megan was now a screaming fanfirl of the headmaster of this illustrious boarding school. Quite the contrary, she had always been, and would always be suspicious of mankind in general, and this included of corse the school administration, or authorities of any kind whatsoever. She had already got many friends and other more or less loose acquaintances on the campus, but having fun with friends would have been too shallow of a motivation for this exceptional tween girl.

As aforementioned, Megan was a future orphic priestess, and she was thence up to spreading the ancient message wherever she deemed it appropriate, thence also one the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

Megan had always been looking down to Drake and Josh, and she had originally praised the opportunity to switch to Pacific Coast Academy as a way to escape from the presence of those dumb boobs. Unfortunately, this had not really worked out the expected way, because Drake would more often come to Pacific Coast Academy for some event, especially because of Lola Martinez. Likewise, Josh Nichols

* * *

**21:2:3 Girl Power From Santa Clarita**

Three female students from James K. Polk in Santa Clarita had applied successfully for a high school scholarship at Pacific Coast Academy, and you already know them somewhat: Jennifer Mosely, Claire Sawyer, and Lisa Zemo.

Jennifer, or — as some preferred to name her — Moze, was a very ambitious and overmotivated girl with a variety of strengths in the academic and athletic department. Her favourite sports was volleyball, where she had already been invited to a bootcamp of the Californian state team. She was excessively huge for her age, which of course helped her a lot.

During the last months preceeding summer break, she had had a cheap and dirty affair with her long term friend Edmond Bigby, one of the dumbest and laziest students of James K. Polk middle school. Fortunately, she had understood that this step had been a huge mistake, and she had trashed him upon the middle school graduation ceremony. More precisely, Jennifer had figured finally that Edmond had sabotaged her woodshop project. She was extremely gifted as a woodshop artist and had been close to winning the state championship, but Bigby had ruined the chair she had built for the judges.[21:4] Ever since, there was no way to dissuade Jennifer from switching schools. This way, her falsely so-called boyfriend had ruined one of her greatest chances in her life, and she would have to work hard to make up for the disaster.

Would Pacific Coast Academy be really a good place for a restart?

Claire Sawyer, still a future lawyer, had figured that schools like Pacific Coast Academy offered the best possible education for future law school students among all high schools in the state of California. She had also trashed her false boyfriend, aforementioned Winston Hunter alias backpack boy. That disgusting creep had hit on her several time in the most perverse and corrupt manner. Claire was disappointed to no end because she had not disposed with him a lot earlier. Would she now get over with it?

Lisa Zemo was a geeky girl which you probably remember as a marginal figure in the war robot team of the Wolves from santa Clarita. She had become the girlfriend of Simon Nelson Cook just a few weeks befire graduation from middle school, and she would have loved to switch with him to Pacific Coast Academy. But Simon Nelson refused to doi so, because he was not over the fact of having been defeated by the scientists from Pacific Coast Academy and their Quinnterruptor. He wanted to get back at the stingray nerds, and definitely not to join them. KLisa did not really approve of Simon's vengeful feelings, but she neither wanted to lose him for that, nor to give up on her chance of graduating from the most elitarian prep school of California. The geographical disctance between Malibu and Santa Clarita was of course not overwhelming, but the frontier was now impenetrable — according to Cookie's mindset.

* * *

**21:2:4 Trinidad Vega**

Busty Latina Trinidad Rebecca Martinez De La Vega was the aforementioned elder sister of drama queen Lola. She wanted to beciome a Hollywood star, too, but she lacked Lola's talent for acting, and even more her talent for singing. Yet this did not prevent her from boasting with it in an excruciatingly ordinary and shameless manner.

The two of them had also got a younger sister[21:5] named **Salvia Martinez De La Vega**. She was a very promising talent in mixed martial arts, and she hated her ethnical heritage, whence she chose _Shelby Marx_[21:6] as her pseudonym. Shelby and Lola looked quite alike and were easy to confuse, inspite of being almost three years apart.

As aforementioned, Trinidad had been asked by Lola to help Chase make his crush jealous. Of course a hot Latina like Trina would never have liked such an excessively uncomely dweeb: She was — obviously — utterly disgusted by the prospects of being seen with the bushy lad. Of course, Lola had told her that it was necessary for a professional actress to be able to practise flirting even with disgusting guys, but this alone was by no means enough of a motivation for the busty Latina: She also needed some sort of payment. It was not possible for her to expect much money from somelone like Chase, but she knew that Chase was a somewhat decent playwright, and thus she accepted a payment based on this:

Chase was supposed to write a musical tailored especially for her to star in. But he was also charged extra for each kiss the two of them had to exchange, for there was nothing more disgusting for Trina then some excruciatingly ugly dork's kisses.

This envisioned musical was of course not the only reason why Trina thought that a switch to Hollywood School For The Professional Performance Arts would moment her career. Like Lola, she was also convinced of making other important and useful contacts. She thought about the possibility of getting Logan to find her a place in his father's productions. Also Quinn and the other science freaks were expected to invent some medication in order to improve her voice.

She needed to fool not only Zoë, but a whole bunch of pupils, by the way of acting skills. How would she do that?

* * *

**21:2:5 Lisa Perkins**

While Trinidad Vega was by absolutely no means a gifted singer, aforementioned Lisa Perkins was one big talent in this field. This Afro-American pop talent had lent her voice to some song composed by Wendy Gellar and with lyrics written by Adelaide Singer. But this had been little more than a beginning of her career. Now she was among the canditates of a most popular casting show: **_America Sings_**.[21:7] The winner of that contest was granted a record contract by **Diamond Records**,[21:8] a record label belonging to the group of Malcolm Reese.

But of course it was not possible for someone like Lisa to rely on this, and she needed to improve her contacts with the leading powers of the scene. Once more, a prep school like Pacific Coast Academy was the perfect place for looking for appropriate company. She appeared superficially very nice, but — deep inside and only visible for onlookers lacking the naïvity of most mere mortals — she was extremely picky and treacherous, doing everything necessary in order to moment her ambitious aspirations.

* * *

**21:2:6 Adelaide Singer**

She had been mentioned already many a time in this story, but never seen in action: Addie Singer from Rocky Road in New Jersey was now a new stingray girl as well. Of course, her decision to move to Pacific Coast Academy was mostly inspired by her Californian friends and relatives, such as Megan Parker and Wendy Gellar. She was thus also aware of the fact that her lyrics had become totally popular in southern California, and especially on the campus of the most elitarian boarding school. She was not yet sure whether she wanted to become a full time songwriter in her future life. Her compositional skills were a plain catastrophe, and playing the guitar was only a feeble attempt of beguiling the audience into believing in her musical skills. She had once been a member of a girl band, but this one had been nothing more than one big mockery.[21:9]

Just a few months ago, she had also won a contest with one of her songs, and, as a consequence, had been selected to perform something in the regional branch of pupular fast food chain **Yumburger**. She had thereupon been nhired for performing side by side with popular rock singer **Robert Hotty**.[21:10] Even more, Yumburger organised a scholarship that finally allowed Addie to switch to the most prestigious boarding school of the west coast. We will see later why this was really the case.

But her decision had not been an easy one, for, like so mant students moving away from home in order to live at a boarding school, she would inevitably leave some friends behind. Two of her best friends were beyond any doubt **Geena Fabiano**[21:11] and **Zachariah Carter Schwartz**.

Geena was a gifted fashion designer, just like Zoë Brooks, but she did not have the human qualities of the Mary Sue — almost quite the contrary: She was on the kist of the bad girls under permanent observation of the evil school shrinks, and she had already been threatened several times with expulsion. In that case, her parents would have sent her to some private school, indeed, but rather some nearby Catholic girl school than a modern-looking coeducational school such as Pacific Coast Academy. Her middle school records had been anything but a recommendation for an admission to Pacific Coast Academy.

Zachariah Carter Schwartz was an Afro-American ecopacifist in the vein of fabulous **Robert Marley**, his idol. But he was not a gifted singer, and he did not have any kind of ambitions in that kind of business. He was particular suspicious — as he should have been — of capitalism in general, and he was not keen of schoold like Pacific Coast Academy which he deemed as only suited for spoiled kids of wealthy perverts, such as Malcolm Reese. On the other hand, he was impressed by the news about the environment friendly uprooting and replanting of an old tree, which would be performed during the following months on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy. This fact confused him a bit and made him curious. Thus he wanted at least to visit Addie at her new school in order to check the status of the old tree.

Although Zach and Geena were by absolutely no means whatsoever compatible, they had become a couple, and this possibility had always scared the living hell out of Addie. She had feared becoming either the fifth wheel of the car, or to stand in the crossfire in the case of any inevitable troubles between the two of them. For that reason, she had been finally glad about having to leave her best friends behind, although this decision had not been an easy one by any means.

The person she would miss most was apparently — at least in the eyes of superficial and naïve onlookers — her boyfriend **Jacob Behari**. They had become a couple only a year ago, after some twisted circumstances. Yet their relationship had always been a mess, consisting of a series of troubles and misunderstandings of the worst sort. Finally, Behari had disagreed wuth Addie's judgment of the relationship between Geena and Zach. Ever since, their dates had been left on the rocks.

**Benjamin Singer**, the elder brother of Addie, was the one person she would definitely have wanted to get rid of. But the exact contrary was the cawe. You will see later down the road why this was the case, but it was one of the worst surprises Addie had hitherto faced.

Was Addie now still able to enjoy her new life at Pacific Coast Academy?

* * *

**21:2:7 Stella Rivera**

It is now the right moment for introducing another new middle school girl: Stella Rivera. She was the real little sister of aforementioned Olivary Biallo alias Jerome Crony alias Marshal Rivera, the lad that had been Michael Barret's partner upon that one middle school dance evening.

Both of these siblings were now potentially switching to Pacific Coast Academy, because their parents were probably about to switch to some south american country where they would not be able to care about the kids. There was still an open question whether the kids were supposed to stay at Pacific Coast Academy for more than a few weeks, though. But that is an issue for later on.

Stella had been a very smart and sly elementary school girl, and she was now trying to make her way through middle school without losing her inquisitive demeanour. So how would she get along with her new class mates, and how much would she be bothered by her weirdo of an elder brother?

* * *

**21:3 Changes On The Campus**

* * *

**21:3:1 The Status Of Sushi Rox**

Claire Sawyer had tried hard to check the sitution of sushi Rox. Unfortunately, she did not really have access to many of the document folders, but she had heard rumours and statements of witnesses that claimed that Kazu had kept many papers he did not even want the envoys of the school administration secret contracts in his cash, and that those had burnt accidentally to a heap of ashes and abillowing cloud of smoke when the kitchen had been set ablaze.

Occasional customers had observed that Kazu had always turned grumpy when people asked certain questions about his upstream sources. Not even Dean Rivers — or so the headmaster claimed — knew any details about the contract, although the relations with Pacific Sushu had been established long since.

The fire brigades and the oilice of Malibu had not been able to figure any traces of a deliberate incidence, but this did not make Claire sawyer give up. She knew that there was something fishy, and she was now looking for competent experts in order to examine the situation more closely.

There had been a huge scandal at James K. Polk's during the last year, and this one had made Claire finally sensitive. The school had been in desperate need of funds for repairing things, but none of them got granted. The reason and the immediate culprite for this scandal was **Hal E. Burton**, school coordinaterof the district schools of Los Angeles County. This charlatan had abused the budget of James K. Polk in order to finance a private construction project.[21:12]

The school's newspaper, involving Edmond Bigby and Jennifer Mosely, had been too much intimidated by the threats issued by Burton. But finally, dauntless teacher had uncovered the scandalous affair.

**Ficus Monroe**[21:13] was usually teaching life science at Polk's, but he was also the adviser of the textile creation club and the honour council.[21:14] Jennifer Mosely and Claire had tried to persuade Monroe to apply for a new job at Pacific Coast Academy, but ythe board of the illustrious boarding school had not been able to agree on him. Monroe had also written a recommendation for Jerome Crony alias Olivary Biallo alias Marshal Rivera that had finally allowed him to get accepted by the admission office of Pacific Coast Academy, for as a bully with multiple entries in the state school records, he would not have been direcxtly acceptable. Monroe himself had once been a bully, and he was now a respected teacher: This example had convinced even Dean Rivers. Alas, there was some phase of approbation, and this would not be easy.

Anyways, Claire Sawyer recommended strongly against the restauration of Sushi Rox until further examination of the situation by indepemndent experts. She had tried to contact **Rosemary Pinchbinder**,[21:15] one of the most renowned bookkeepers of New York City, in order to get her to check the financial situation of Kazu's and Pacific Sushi. Also, Joyce Lee, aforementioned aunt of Evelyn Kwong, was known to be associated with Pacific Sushi since quite a few years. The situation was made eve more complicated by the fact that Joyce Lee was also most likely the shadowy figure responsible for **Hongkong Palace**,[21:16] a chain of Chinesse restaurants in the northeastern states. There had been ongoing obscure negotiations between Hongkong Palace and Pacific Sushi that had already been subject of official hearings conducted by the federal antitrust authority.

Of course, the mass of sttudents would not be glad about this, and there were already hastily-founded movements aiming requesting the reopening of Sushi Rox, and those were often mean-looking guys like Samantha Puckett and Coach Keller.

Many students would have been content with a decent alternative to the Japanese pub, but those had become rare duriong the last decade.

The cafeteria could have expanded its services, but this was impossible without more catering franchise partners willing to take the plunge.

* * *

**21:3:2 The Yumburger Campaign**

Fastfood chain Yumburger was firmly rooted in New York City and in many other regions of the northeastern states, but they had already started coveting the Californian market over a decase ago. Ever since, there had been attempts of establishing branches in the form of catering franchises. But those had not yet been eclatantly successful, albeit not discouraging enough to make the headquarters in New York stop the whole campaign.

The news about the end of Sushi Rox had stoked the fire for a new attempt of establishing a branch in the greater Los Angeles area. As we have seen before, the school's administration was regularly collecting data with respect to the preferences of the students. But the board did even more than that: Thye sold those data to interested market reasearch offices with partners spread throughout the whole country. This was probably against the contracts the school had got with the parents, but there was always a lot of small print leaving some kind of backdoor. The management of Yumburger had got access to these statistics, whence they had concluded that a large boarding school like Pacific Coast Academy was a perfect place to start a new campaign for establishing the enterprise in California.

The committee of the board of Pacific Coast Academy responsible for the management of the cafeteria had already started looking for catering franchise partners since spring break, and they had got multiple offers, but — in their eyes — the most solid and reliable offer was clearly the one submitted by Yumburger.

For the headquarters in New York City, this was nothing but a start into the looming era of the company's domination of the fast food market of the greater Los Angeles area, if not the whole western coast — all the way from San Diego to Vancouver. Of course it was not possible to achieve a higher degree of popularity among the teenage population of Los Angeles and its metropolitan area without massive advertising.

As we have already insinuated, Addie Singer had once written the lyrics of a song that had been used shamelessly by Yumburger in order to promote its own upgrades in New Jersey, and she had been stuck into some costume and made per. But this had been only the start. Once the manager of Addie's local branch had heard about her wish to switch to some elitary boarding school in Los Angeles, they had thought about using her shamelessly in order to extend the promotional campaign even there at the western coast. When the headquarters of Yumburger had decided to cooperate with the cafeteria of Pacific Coast Academy, there had been no way back: Addie Singer was granted a scholarship, but — in turn — she had to work for their publicity apparatus. Unfortunately, Robert Hotty was not available in California, but the vicinity to Hollywood would make it easy to find a suitable replacement for him. Adelaide Singer had even made a suggestion on her own: Drake Parker, the elder brother of her Californian friend Megan. The management in New York Cuty had not yet heard about him, because the teebnage rock idol from San Diego had not yet got a record contract, and he was thus not yet really well known outside California. But it would not be hard for Addie to convince the management to give them a chance.

* * *

**21:3:3 Cooperation Of Blix Of Yumburger**

Of course, students were not only hungry, but also thirsty in the evening hours, and it made a lot of sense to sell foot and drinks in the same place. In the northeastern states, there was sume upstream franchise providing drinks for the respective local branches of Yumburger. But this company had not been willing to expand into the metropolitan realms of Los Angeles, the undisputed stronghold of Blix.

Reaching out for the complex and difficult Californian market was already a huge adventure for the business administration of Yumburger. They needed a local partner in order to resell soft drinks, and in order to avoid further risks, the headquarters in the city of freedom saw no better option than cooperating with the one really established soft drink imperium at the whole pacific coast, videlicet: Blix.

Since the software csare was already a sponsor of Pacific Coast Academy and an established vendor, it was not hard to get them to cooperate, but Blix was the one in command thus able to dictate a lot of details of their cooperation contract.

Claire Sawyer would find a lot of fauult with these contracts upon taking a closer look at them, but this is a subject for later times.

* * *

**21:3:4 The Catering Staff**

While lots of Blix products were sold by vendor machines, catering carts were still a lto more popular, and they were definitely an advantage for the sales of most foods: meat products, potato-based food, salads, vegetables, and condiments.

For their own catering carts, Yumburger wanted to choose its own vendor staff. As the job implied selling Blix's products, they needed someone experienced with the same equipment as that used by the soft drink giant from the west. Smoothie blenders used by Blix were produced partly by Bristow Juices in Kansas. The same machines were also used by **Juice**, a chain of small to medium sized smoothie pubs in New Jersey. There was even a branch near Rocky Road, which had always been a popular place for Adelaide Singer and her friends to hang out. Even more, Addie's brother Benjamin was working there. **Mike Hairyberry**,[21:17] the manger of that branch, had suggested Addie's evil elder brother because he wanted to get rid of him as fast as possible — and as far asway as possible.

Ben was now a senior at Rocky Road High School, but he was hell bent on dropping out of high school upon turning eighteen in order to start working on his career as the owner of his own smoothie catering service._The Test_ He was of course glad to take over this job, although it was still a few levels below his ultoimate goal. But it was a great step forward, and he was equally looking forward to hitting on all those attractive prep school girls hge was going to deal with on a daily base.

For Adelaide Singer, who was still disguusted to no end by her eleder brother's demeanour, this was of course one giant shock she would hardley ever recover from.

But Benjamin Singer was not going to be alone in his new job. Yumburger was also hiring **Terence Bo**, a former college basketball star of Jamaican origin with a huge amount of odd attitudes. This combination sounded like having the potential for wreaking severe havoc all over the campus of Pacific Coast Academy. Until the arrival of the high school dropout from Rocky Road, Terrence Bo woulsd run the catering cart all alone. He had already worked in various similar jobs since the untimely end of his career as a basketball player in Seattle, and he had kept on causing nothi ng but trouble with his treatement of the customers. But was this going to get anywhere?

* * *

**21:3:5 New Blix Products**

Due to the busy research of Quinn Pensky and Mindy Crenshaw, Blix was now able to offer a few ne flavours. Those drinks were ion tyheir test phase, and the kids of Pacific Coast Academy were the unwary test objects of the whole mission.

Before the official opening of Terrence Bo's mobile catering booth, only the vendor machines were selling the new flavours of Blix, and those had been programmed in a way that collected customers' habits and trnsmitted them directly to the headquarters of Blix. It would thus soon turn out which kind of kids preferred which taste of Blix. Overall, pinacolada would be the most popular of the new flavours.

Down to the improvements of the connections between Blix and its partners from the agricultural flyover states, the new products by Los Angeles' soft drink guiant contained now high fructose corn syrup as its one and only sweetening ingredient. According to recent studies, this kind of sugar was supposed to be more conductive to obesity than cane sugar. Nevertheless, Blix and Schneider's Bakery had not only increased its usage in thier own product, but also enforced several states to pass laws prohibiting the usage of cane sugar completely for many similar products. This allowed them to establish more and more monopolies. For example, Canadian fatcakes were soon going to be declared completely illegal in most of the United States.

Quinn had been worried for quite awhile, and she was uoo researching alternatives for corn syrup, based on honey or exotic vegetable extracts. But would her ideas get accepted in any way by Blix, or would she havve to continue her research in the dark?

* * *

**21:4 Room Management**

This was the third year of coeducation at Pacific Coast Academy, and the number of girls had been increasing steadily. While female student had been clearing outnumbered in the very start, the propaganda momented by Garth Berman had finally resulted in equal numbers. This development had exceeded the expectations of the board and the worst nightmares of Leo Bradford.

While one dormitory hall had been sufficient for the girls of the first coeducational year, there had been two of them for the second year. And now a third block was added. Brenner Hall was for the high schoool girls, Butler Hall for the middle school girls, and a hitherto unnamed hall was added for the female elementary school students.

Coco Wexler was responsible for Brenner Hall only, and she had not yet been fired, instead of having messed up more things than possible. The only reason was of course that no woman with a trace of self esteem would have accepted a job like that for close to no pay except a dirty apartment and free tin food.

The addition of the new dormitory blocked caused a lot of organisational work during the summer break. Most of it would have been in the hands of aforementioned Miss Burvich, but that grumpy spinster was now on a honeymoon trip across the seven seas. Flabbergasted Dean Rivers had got no other choice than making the dormitory advisers perform the room assignments, a task for which there was almost no time left. Most dormitory advisers were not able to use a computer appropriately, not even a 'user-friendly' peartop. And the fact that some dormitory rooms had been in need of restauration after the last academic year — and were thus out of service for a feww months to come — did not make the organisational tasks any easier. There was already some substitute on store for Ms. Burvich, but this **Theodore Conroy**[21:18] was still up for confirmation, and he would have arrived only a few weeks later, anyways.

And in the case of overburdened and generally incompetent Coco Wexler, this meant inevitably nothing but a quagmire of chaos and confusions. She was not up to the task and messed up room numbers with her bra size, in addition to many other embarrassing misunderstandings. The girls were better prepared for some turmoil.

* * *

**Chapter 22 Yet Another Year At PCA**

* * *

**22:1 Chaos Upon Arrival**

* * *

**22:1:1 Chase and Trina**

Chase was leading his feint girlfriend onto the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

Of course, the busty Latina had already heard about it from her sister Lola, but she was still surprised by its luxurious aura. She compared it to a spa, and deemed it hard to learn here. This was not an atypical impression of new students. But whenever Lola talked about it, Trina had just believed that her sister had been lying in order to taunt her and to make her envious.

Trina alias Rebecca would pretend to be Chase's girlfriend from his hometown. Their mothers would be believed to be colleagues in the same office.

All this cover story had been the idea of Lola, but Chase had written the script for this, especially the first encounter with Zoë Brooks.

Quinn Pensky, and Nicole Bristow had been introduced by Lola into this diabolic plan. They would support it by tricking Zoey into going to look for Chase. According to Quinn ad Lola, Chase wanted to see Zoey in order to tell her some important news. And when Zoey was there, Chase and Trina would start to make out in front of her eyes. This should be enough in order to get Zoey to explode for jealousy — at least according to Chase's and Lola's sick plan.

But before executing this perfect-looking plot, Chase would have to take care of his luggage. He was now on his way to look for Maxwell Hall when he spotted Logan and Michael across some meadow.

* * *

**22:1:2 Fight For The Single Bed**

Pupils of Pacific Coast Academy got assigned their dormitory rooms, but not their bed

Logan Reese and Michael Barret were fighting over the single bed. According to Logan, he had got a natural privilege, but Michael believed in equal chances and taking turns. Both of them had forgotten that Michael had already claimed the single bed two years ago. They got now in a really chaotic argument.

Chase came alomg in order to separate the combattants. After calming them down for the time being, he suggested that the first to reach 148 Maxwell Hall would be granted the choice. When his pas agreed, he simply pushed them into the meadow, because he also wanted to secure the single spot for himself.

Logan and Michael were consternated, but they got up again in order to try toi make the reace.

* * *

**22:1:3 Chase Runs Into Zoey**

This was the third common year of Chase Matthews and Zoë Brooks at Pacific Coast Academy, and their third _first encounter of the academic year_.

Chase had hitherto always stumbled, crashed, or floundered when running into the blond Mary Sue after some break, and this was even now the case.

Zoey and Dustin were crossing the campus with thweir luggage. Dustin wanted to help his sister with hers, but he would soon change his mind. But now they noticed Chase stumbling all over the place, losing his luggage.

The bushy dork was busy picking it up again in order to continue the race to Maxwell Hall. And now he faced Zoey, which made him gasp. Not only was he excessively nervous because of his devious plan to make her jealous, but also because he remembered that Zoey had announced to make an important decision. But he was too anxcious to ask her right away about it, just has he had always been a coward when it came dioen to telling her about his feelings.

Zoey did not really want to tell him right now, anyways. She wanted to gather her friends in the lounge and then to tell them all at once instead of having to hunt down everyone or to rely on a propagation of the news from pupil to pupil.

In this moment, Jacob Ross showed up nearby, and he had already encountered new girls Stella Rivera and Stephanie Wells.[22:1] Now he wanted Dustin to join him and the girls to the beach. At first glance, Zoey's little brother was reluctant, as he had already promised his sister to help her with the luggage, but upon spotting the female company of Jacob, he changed his mind in no time, leaving Zoey behind.

Likewise, Chase was still worried about the possibility of gaining his coveted single bed, so he was unable to stay with the blond Mary Sue.

* * *

**22:1:4 Missing Dormitory Room**

Zoey Brooks had finally tortured herself into reaching 101 Brenner Hall, where she was exposed to some other shock.

Dana Cruz and Nicole Bristow were already here and had accomodated their belongings — this time without the usual turmoil. Quinn wanted to leave her own luggage and that of Lola in 101 — against the explicit will of Dana. She explained that she and Lola had been assigned a dormitory room that did not even exist. Their old room was out of service because the school administration had been forced to repair it — as a consequence of Quinn'stwo way television system whose installation had ruined part of the walls. Likewise, some of her experiments had got an equally destructive effect on the ceiling.

Lola was now looking for Coco Wexler in order to ask for a clarification, and Zoey was once more expected to arbiter. She granted the roomless girls some kind of temporary access to the dormitory room. "If your room had been lost, Quinn and Lola woudl equally allow you to leave your luggage inside theirs." Quinn nodded solemnly, albeit in a hypocritical manner. Dana panted heavily, but she made it clear that obnoxious scientific experiments were not tolerated.

Finally, Coco and Lola showed up. The dormitory adviser was carrying an open can of ravioli and tried to eat some of them while talkimng to the girls. She had to admit to her mistake, but she knew very well that there was no free rooms left, or at least the computer had not found any. Quinn offered to check the software problem during the next day. Coco knew of one solution, through. "The room in the basement is only occupied by one girl."

Lola and Quinn shrugged. "OK!" But they sensed very well that a dormitory room in the basement was not exactly comparable to the standard rooms at Pacific Coast Academy.

* * *

**22:1:5 Can't Sink Any Deeper**

So, this was the darkest place in 101 Brenner Hall. ensky Lola Martinez started shivering. although she had not had any problems in the haunted mansion. But the darkness combined with moisture and the resounding noises from above gave our favourite drama queen totally the creeps. Quinn had got scientific explanations for everything, but they were little helpful in this situation.

There were a few storage rooms usually only accessed by the custodian, the janitors, and a bunch of construction workers hired on an hourly base by the school's administration — for example in order to repair Quinn's and Lola's previous room.

The new dormitory cell of Quinn and Lola was basically nothing more than such a storage room that had been hastily made habitable — at least according to some hobos' definition of _habitable_. And the locks of these cells in the basement were not comparable to those of the dormitory rooms above surface level: They were rather simple portable locks with old-fashioned keys. Custodian Banville had provided the girls with those, and even he would have shuddered when forced tolive down there. Quinn tried to see the bright side of it. "Maybe we may cultivate mushrooms here in the dark, as they do in the catacombs below the surface of Paris." These prospects did not do much in order to make Lola feel more at ease. She feared losing her healthy tan, which would be a disadvantage for her career as an actress oportraying attractive girls in fluff comedies.

And then it was the time for Quinn and Lola to face their new room mate: Stacey Dillsen, aforeentioned girl from Swampscott in Massachusetts.

Stacey introduced hersel, and her penetrant lisp hurt Lola's ears worse than the stink of a skunk would have ever hurt her nose. Things were worse when Stacey exhibited one of the visible and touchable results of her hobby: A cotton swab model representing the house of her dreams.

Usually, Quinn would have found Stacey and her hobbies interesting, and even more so after discovering her telescope with which she wanted to watch the stars at night. Quinn was interested in astrophysics, and thus she could have easily tried to engage with Stacey in a scientific talk. But she had been degenerated a lot by Lola's company, and now she started feeling annoyed by the lispy girl. However, she remembered with ease how much she had been duisgusted by Wayne Gilbert during her first year, and now she got along with him and his pals in a fairly acceptable manner. So there was still some hope left for Quinn and Staceym, but none at all for the cotton swab freak and the Hollywood diva.

Quinn and Lola were now about to accomodate their luggage. Besides her tan, Lola was most worried about the possible effect of the moisture on her nice clothes, which she needed for upcoming auditions and her aforementioned negotiations with the Dingo Group. Quinn feared for one of her experiments: She had got her own beehive, and she knew very well that her tribe of bees needed a lot of sun. She claimed that she just liked fresh honey for breakfats, but this was just a lie in order to cover the real purpose of her apicultural activities: She wanted to create a new sort of bees in order to create a new kind of honey as a sweetening ingredient for Schneider's Bakery and for Blix. But we will see more details of it later on. Lola was scared by the killer bees, anyways, and thus Quinn was forced to take them to some other place, such as either the school garden or Mindy's dormitory room.

The deportation of those two girls into the basement had already got some extremely adversary fact on one of their most important plans: They were not able to help Chase to make Zoey jealous by pushing her into catching him in flagrante delicto making out with Trina alias Rebecca.

* * *

**22:1:6 Too Much Pepper**

It is now the right time in order to look at the outcome of the quest for the single bed in 148 Maxwell Hall.

Chase Matthews had been too much scared by the thoughts of Zoey leaving for France after just one year, and this had kind of paralysed him. He kept on roaming the campus aimlessly, until running into his fake girlfriend, Trinidad Vega. In any case, he would be much too late at his dormitory room for making thge run to the single bed.

The race between Logan and Michael was still on. On their way to Brenner Hall, they had trapped and tripped each other over and over again, by the way of all means imaginable. In the end, it had been a dead race, so another decider had to be found.

First, they found two pairs of boxing mittens lying on the campus. They decided to fistfight for the single bed. Wghere had the mittens nbeen from? Logan and Michael did not knoiw, and they did not even care. Alas, after a few punches, they figured that this was not getting anywhere. Both of them had neglected working out during the summer break. Now they were better off with a different kind of competition.

Unfortunately, their choice fell on a contest involving the consumption of chili pods. Even worse, they had chosen Peruvian puff peppers which Quinn had purchased during the summer break as a special snack for her aforementioned alpaca Otis. Lofgan and Michael had simply stoilen them from Quinn's luggage without knowing that those spicy vegetables were unsuited for human consumption, and they were about to risk chronic kidney failure. Granted, this disease would not kick in immediately, but after a few years for sure, and then the health of those two useless guys would be in extreme trouble.

Along came Megan Parker, accompanied by her friends Wendy Gellar and Adelaide Singer. Megan recognised the jerk and his creepy sidekick, but she also recognised the kind of hot vegetable they had just consumed en masse. "Guys, these are Peruvian puff peppers!"

Logan and Michael were still breathing flames, although they had tried to extinguish them by diving head first into the campus fountain. For them, those peppers were just hot pods.

Megan had to tell them thrice about the particular dangers emanating from the Peruvian variant. "You need to look for medical treatment, or else …"

Michael asked Logan: "Are my lips already chapped?"

Logan felt some imaginaryt pain in his shoulders. "Aw, my kidneys!"

Addie had to correct the jerk. "Hey, you know that the kidneys are located a lot lower, don't you?"

Logan looked puzzled. "What do you mean?"

Megan told Addie to be silent. "See, you need some urgent surgery! So it is off to the infirmary! Or do you prefer Quinn remove your kidneys surgically and feed them to one of her killer pets?"

Inspite of knowing that the school nurse was still one perverted fury, those two stupid guys ran straight into the infirmary, where they would be treated worse than by all devils in hell. Those hypochondriacs woulkd be kept there for a few days, and then they would be forwarded to St. Schneider's hospital for some painful professional emergency treatment by incompetent medics and nurses with mo experience in treating a puff pepper poisoning.

Until then, Chase Matthews would have the dormitory room for himself, and he would be able to enjoy the single bed. He would even keep it after the return of Logan and Michael.

* * *

**22:1:7 Nicole Spoils The Plan**

Nicole Bristow, Dana Cruz, and Zoey Brooks were now ready for lunch. They had heard about the new flavours of Blix, and they were equally eager on testing them. Likewise, they had already heard rumours about Terrence Bo's new catering cart. The opinions of the girls were split. Nicole and Zoey were about to miss Kazu and Sushi Rox badly, as both of them were obsessed with sushi. Nicole had already decided to join the league fro bringing Kazu back. Dana did not mind, she just wanted to eat, no matter what, as long as there was enough for her in order to remain strong and beautiful.

But before refilling their currently empty stomachs, they wanted to find Lola and Quinn. Zoey was curious as of whether those girls liked their new residence, but she doubted it a lot. The ditzy wench from Kansas squealed, "let's hurry!Lola and Quinn want to tell you about Chase and his feelings for you, and then they want to show him his new girlfriend."

Zoey gasped. "Chase does what? He has a girlfriend, but then he alsohas a crush on me?"

Dana shrugged. "Our bimbo is pretty much confused … ain't she?"

Nicole explained: "Lola had got that plan. Her sister is acting as if she were Chase's girlfriend, but it is just in order to make you jealous." She kept on blathering about the motivations. "We are tired because this with you and Chase is not going anywhere, although Chase has been hankering after you since the day we arrived on the campus."

Dana and Zoey gazed at their foolish room mate.

Nicole admitted that she should not have said this. "It was supposed to be a surprise for you." She sighed deeply.

Dana shook her head. "I know that Nicole can't be relied on if she is supposed to keep something secret."

Zoë Brooks was now totally consternated, and she needed to think about ways to reacting appropriately. She was still supposed to tell her friends about her decision concerning her switch to France. But if Nicole was right, Chase Matthews, Lola Martinez, and Quinn Pensky had never been her friends in the first place — or so concluded Zoey.

Dana had not been a member of the conspiracy of making Zoey jealous, but she understood thoroughly why Nicole, Quinn, and Lola had decided to commit that deprecable deed. She htoo had been annoyed by the situation that had kept going on between Zoey and Chase. Asa result, sje thought that Zoey's situation was most likely the Mary Sue's very own fault, and she was little able or willing to support Zoey now.

* * *

**22:1:8 Dustin Likes Stella**

Dustin Brooks had had some nice hour by the beach with Jacob Ross and the two girls, videlicet Stephanie and Stella. The first of those girls had to leave early, because she was not really a student at this school and only here in order to visit some friend, but she had been forgotten by that person. On the other hand, Dustin and Stella got along nicely.

But none of those sixth grade kids were aware of the fact that his sister and her brother had encountered each other already, and that they had even danced around the fountain in the moon light. Dustin seemed to have some feelings for Stella after just a few minutes of conversation down by the beach. Alas, he was still too shy to admit toi them, although he knew that he would be daunted mercillessly by Jack for those.

By the way: Jack Ross was no longer Dustin's room mate. Their dormitory adviser had to tear them apart because of some new kids. Dustin's new room pal would be **Robert Carmichael**[22:2]

Dustin decided now to look for his elder sister, for he had not heard of her for over an hour already, and he still neeed to get his own luggage done.

* * *

**22:2 Spreading Zoey's Decision**

* * *

**22:2:1 Zoey Turns Angry**

Zoë Brooks had cancelled her social dinn er with her room mates, because she was in an excessively stinly mood. All she relly wanted now was to get this running school year fly past as fast as only possible and then to move to Paris and let them all behind in the dirt. But of course she needed to know whether Nicole had been right about Chase, Lola, Quinn, and their perverse plan to use aother girl to make her ultiimately jealous. She knew that there was no way for her to forgive such an excruciatingly perverse and abusive plan.

And now she bounced out onto the campus in order to look for nothing special, because she did not really know how to ask Quinn and Lola. She knew that they would hardly admit to being up to fool her with some decadent plot.

* * *

**22:2:2 Delayed Plans**

At the same time, Lola Martinez and Quinn Pensky were still unaware of the fact that Nicole had unintentionelly spoiled it all. After having left the basement, they needed to find the bimbo from Kansas in order to perform the next steps: Luring Zoë into watching a scene featuring Chase and Trina make put in front of their eyes. They had entered the lounge, hoping to find Zoë and Nicole therein. But they had not got any luck.

Quinn Pensky picked up her mobile telephone in order to contact Nicole Bristow. But the bimbo wench did not dare to pick up her tech mate, because Dana's reaction had made her aware of the fact that Lola and Quinn had been relying on her secrecy. And now she left Lola alone in order to take care of her swarming and stinging bugs. The experiment was too important to be given up on prematurely.

Lola Martinez, on the other hand, tried to contact her sister Trina and Chase Matthews, in order to tell them about the delay of their plans. She used her own mobile device for that avail, and Chase was fortunately there. The fake lovebirds were little pleased upon hearing about the complications.

In this moment, Claire Sawyer, Jennifer Mosely, and Lisa Zemo entered the lounge of Brenner Hall, looking for their dormitory room. Lisa needed to call her boyfriend Simon Nelson Cook and tell him about her arrival, while Jennifer had to face countelss calls by Edmond Bigby who had still not understood that their absolutely absurd relationship was now finally all over.

Lola spotted Claire. "Hi, may we sue Coco Wexler for messing up with our dormitory rooms?"

The future lawyer grinned. "I hope so, but what is the situation?"

Lola explained the whole misery that had forced them to live in a basement room. "And then that room mate, Stacey Dillsen … she is such a creepy pest. She talks with a lisp, and she is ugly, and …"

Claire Sawyer had already studied the rules of Pacific Coast Academy and the boarding contracts. "Did you and your parents state in field 5632, segment 7 d, of your form that darkness and moisture are bad for your health? And what about an allergy to lisping room mates?"

Lola looked aghast. "I do not really think so …"

The situation was thus a little bit more complicated, and Claire needed to talk about this in detail with Lola at some later point.

* * *

**22:2:3 Dustin Runs Into Zoey**

Zoë Brooks was now sitting alone on a bench at the margins of the campus square. And that's where she was found byher little brother.

Dustin saw the despair in his sister's tortured face. "Zoey? I'm sorry for not helping you with the lugge=age," He looked ashamed.

Zoey sighed deeply. "There is worse than having to manage your luggage all alone, …" She panted heavily and continued, "such as being bacstabbed by your false friends and room mates."

Dustin looked aghast. "Zoey? What do you mean?"

Zoey told her little brother about the news she had heard accidentally from Nicole Bristow. "That's it …I can't trust my own pals."

Dustin hugged his sister. "What if Nicole has confuused something? She gets sidetracked so easily."

Zoey panted heacvily. "I need to hear it straight from Chase. And who is that girl anyways Lola's elder sister, that is?"

Dustin shrugged. "I may spy on him."

Zoey shook her head. "If Nicole is wrong, this would be a very mean thing to do."

Dustin suspired. "OK, but if he does really try to do this to you, he will have to shovel his own tomb."

Zoey forced herself into smiling. "That's what he deserves: She almost puked. "You know why I had hesitated for over a year before deciding to go to Paris?"

Dustin shook his head. "You will tell me?"

Zoey sighed. "I did sense that there was something going on within Chase. And I had believed that he was maybe a much better guy than Logan or Michael, whatever. I was notsure about it, and I had waited until I was urged into deciding because I had expected him to admit honestly to his feelings — if he ever had any." She stomped her feet. "But if it is true that Chase hires a girl in order to make me jealous, he is no better than any other teenage boy, and he's as abusive towards girl as Logan." She almost sobbed. "I could have made it to Paris already for my freshman year. And now I have wasted two years trying to figure what Chase was really up to."

Dustin had to wipe the tears off his sister's contorted face, and he needed to be extremely careful. Then he had to think about Stella Rivera. the girl he had met today down by the beach. He was unable to deny that she had got some sort of feelings for her, and this sounded a lot like Chase's situation upon Zoey's arrival at Pacific Coast Academy. And now he saw the whole potential relationship of the bushy dork nd the blond Mary Sue burst into microscopic smithereens. Did he want something to happen unto himself and Stella? Hell no! Dustin had been disappointed too much by girls during his last two years, And he knew that Stella was possibly not gping to be around for much longer — because of the tricky seituation of her family. In other words, he had learned to admit to his feelings in time instead of just letting things flow along until it was too late.

Zoey wondered, "Dustin, you aree so silent all of a sudden. What is going on?"

Dustin stammered, "er … not much!"

Zoey shrugged. She had seen Dustin run to the beach with two new gorls, but she was not sure whether one of them had been Dustin's new interest. But she deemed it possible. In any case, she did not want to intervene too early, at least not as long as she was stuck in her own quagmire.

Dustin wondered, "have you already told your friends about your decision?"

Zoey moaned, "sorry, didn't get to do so, because there was some problem with Quinn's and Lola's new dorm, and now I am no longer sure whether those backstabbers deserve being told about it."

Dustin nodded solemnly. "So if the whole conspiracy turns out true, you will refrain from telling them?"

Zoey growled, "well, I will tell them, anyways, but not as politely as I would have liked to before coming to know about the whole filthy cabal."

* * *

**22:2:4 Brute End Of A Crush**

Chase Matthews had been informed by Megan Parker about the destiny of his room pals, and thus he was now happy about being allowed to use the single bed. But then he was worried because of Lola's call about the delay.

Trina needed to go once more through the whole filthy plot with him. "Shouldn't your friends already have urged her to show up? I warn you … if I have to wait in a room with you for much longer, I will charge extra fees … and not too little, I tell you!"

Only in this moment, Zoey Brooks showed up. After the conversation with her brother, she had decided to go straight ahead and to bring it on in order to get a clear answer as soon as possible.

Chase coughed, whispering to Trina, "OK we have to make out!"

Trinidad Vega was reluctant, but she had to do what they had agreed on, albeit for an extra fee.

Zoey grinned. "Oh, this is Lola's sister?"

Chase stammered, "what, Lola's sister? How would you think that? No, this is Rebecca, a girl next door from my hometown. Our mothers work together in an office, and so …"

Zoey chuckled. "You want me to believe that? Come on! Nicxole told me everything!"

Trina pulled away from Chase, ready to vomit because feeling the face of the excessively disgusting and uncomely dork next to her own had been an excruciatingly humiliating experience.

Zoey continued, explaining that she had decided to go to paris, but also that she had wished to have accepted the offer by Monique Chaumont already much earlier and saved herself from having to bear hypocritic friends for the longest time. "No words may express how disappointed I am, especially because of your demeanous. Too bad Paris is not on a different planet!"She stomped her feet as loud as only possible, and then she walked away without wasting yet another word on her treacherous friend of two years.

* * *

**22:2:5 Quinn's New Room Mates**

Quinn Pensky was ready to put her bee hive and other unusual equipment into the scientific laboratory. Well, the bees were meant for the garden, but there were a few other things …

Unfortunately, she did not have the right keys, and so she needed to look for them. She tried to contact Way ne Gilbert, but it would turn out that he had not got the key , either. Likewise, he was allergic to certain types of pollen, and he would thus better not hose the bee hive for the next days. But Wayne told Quinn about Evelyn Kwong's room, which he supposed to be more suited, anyways.

Quinn took the hint and tried to contact Evelyn by the way of her mobile telephone from Santa Barbara. Evelyn Kwong confirme dthe availability. One of her so-called dormitory room mates had just turned out as the name of the company selling Coco Wexler's bras. Then the two girls had even got a better idea: Quinn would move in completely with Evelyn and Adelaide. This way, she would come to live with two freshmen. This was usually not acceptble, but it seemed to be an exceptional situation, and definitely a better idea than withering away in the dark and moist basement.

* * *

**22:2:6 Lola And Zoey Trade Rooms**

Lola Martinez was contacting Chase Matthews again in order to tell him that she had still not been able to lure Zoey into his room. But now it was too late, anyways. She heard the news staright from the dork's mouth:

Everything had been in vain. Nicole had screwed it all up. Zoey would leave for France after the current academic year, anyways, and she would avoid him at all costs until then.

Lola was totally shocked, because that meant that Zoey was now awfully upset at her, and thence she would not tailor any outfits when Lola needed to go to some audition. This would most likely turn out as some big obstacle for her career, especially the chance of becoming the star of _Totally Terry_. Alas, rotting away in the basement would be even worse than that.

Suddenly, the techmate started ringing again, and this time, it was Zoë Brooks. She was already ready to hang upo withoutreally talking to the Mary Sue, but she decided to get everything confirmed by her maybe-no-longer friend.

Zoey was in a stinky mood indeed. But then she offered to trade rooms with Lola, because she did not wanted to stay any longer in the same dormitory room as Nicole Bristow, who had cheated on her by participating in the conspiracy. She did not deem losing Dana a big loss, because she had never had a high opinion of the bully Latina, anyways.

Lola squealed cheerfully, because this seemed to be the solution of her problems. But there was of course some sort of a hitch: She was really upset because Nicole had screwed it all up. But then she decided to use this as an aoccasion to make Nicole pay dearly for her stupid mistake. She would use her supreme acting skills in order to make the bimbo wench believe that she had forgiven her. And then she would await the right occasion in order to embarrass her for good.

* * *

**22:2:7 Zoey's World Goes Dark**

Zoë Brooks had finally arrived in her new and unnumbered dormitory cell in the dungeons below Brenner Hall, and she was facing her new cell mate: Stacey Dillsen.

The weirdness of the new addition to the girls' forces at Pacific Coast Academy was obvious also for Stacey. But she had not yet been backstabbed by her, and she did not think that someone like Stacey would be really able or willing to do something like that. The cotton swab freak just needed some time to get accustomed to, and that was all — or so at least hoped the Mary Sue from Louisiana.

At the beginning of her third and last year at 'pca, Zoë Brooks had thus arrived at the bottom and the darkest point of her life on this campus — both literally and metaphorically.

Was there still a hope left for turning the following months into something useful, or would she forever have to look back at two wasted years at this most illustrious Californian boarding school? As I made clear above, Zoë Brooks was the last hope for Pacific Coast Academy, and there was only that little time left for her to save the world of Pacific Coast Academy from the swamp of decadence and corruption in which it had been stuck for decades already.

* * *

**22:3 Extracurricular Activities**

* * *

**22:3:1 Graphic Novels**

Logan Reese and Michael Barret had finally been released from hell lias the infirmary of Pacific Coast Academy. They would have to visit an expert later on in order to check the real influence of the puff pepper poisoning on their metabolism. For the time being, they were back to their dorms and forced to share the bunk beds. But who was going to take the bottom bunk, and who would have to rest in the uppermost bed?

Chase Matthews and Michael Barret had founded their web show for the primary purpose of making their own cartoon productions somewhat popular.

After some initial difficulties, Wayne Gilbert had helped them by te way of taking care of the technical problems of their show, and he had commanded them to change the style of the whole crap. With the help of painter girl Maria Misa, he they had been able to adapt to the new style.

Finally, the direction of _Toon Juice_ had taken a closer look at the cartoons, and although they were not exactly experts fo graphic novels, they had decided to give Chase and Michael a chance. Those dweebs were now required to submit a certain amount of cartoons on a monthly base, and they would even make a few bucks by this way. But they had to stay original — which was not always easy, given the prevalence of _Marvel_ and _DC_.

They hoped that the requirements would not conflict with their other extracurricular activities. especially the basketball team. As we would see below, the team was in serious troubles.

But Chase needed that badly, especially after having felt like being knocked straight into his privates by the events of the first day of the academic year. Zoey Brooks was still in the basketball team, or so Chase had assumed, and thus seeing her sduring basketball practice would be inevitable. Diving head first into a mass of work necessary for the purpose of fulfilling the requirements imposed upon him and Michael by _Toon Juice_ seemed to be the best possible escape, at least for the time being.

Michael was most consternated, because he had never expected his best pal to come up with such a supid idea in order to make Zoey jealous. But he was somewhat guilty, because he had often enough pushed him hard into telling Zoey about everything, and he had thusly made him feel totally uneasy.

* * *

**22:3:2 Basketball Blues**

The middle school basket ball team of Pacific Coast Academy had won the state champipnships during the first year of coeducation. The reasons had been the great coaching skills of Mr. Ferguson, the motivating power of the new cheerio squad with Dana Cruz as their boss, and the leadership of captain Brooks. This victory had been appreciated by the sponsors, but a middle school basketball team was nevertheless nowhere near as prestigious as a football team.

Then most teams of the team had turned into high school freshmen. Thus a lot of things had been expected from it, both by the students, the teachers, the staff, the school's administration, and the sponsors. But nothing at all had worked anywhere near as expected, and making it to the regionals had been everything achieved by them. Of course there had been various reasons for the downfall: Zoey Brooks had turned a bit weaker because she was still under the pressure of having to decide about her possible move to Meudon, and of course about her bickering room mates. But the major reason for the decay had been aforementioned Coach Keller, one of those coches without any pedagogical and motivational skill, and even less without a brain.

This was now the third year, and the sponsors had insinuated that they expected at least once more the qualification for the Californian state finals, or else there would be severe cuts. They meant serious business, increasing the pressure resting on the shoulders of this team.

Coach Keller, once more responsible for both the basketball team and the football squad of Pacific Coast Academy, had gathered the basketball team of this season, which included especially Zoë Brooks, Logan Reese, Chase Matthews, and Michael Barret. As we saw before, he was in an extremely stinky mood because — according to his own judgment — Chase and Michael had incinerated the only sushi bar on the campus, and because it had never been restored. He was now one of the leading members of the league for bringing Kazu and his bar back onto the campus, and he wanted to destroy Chase and Michael for having committed that most unforgivable deed — ever! For the above reason, Chase Matthews and Michael Barret feared to get excluded from the team, but this was not the case. Rather, the coach was going to keep them and then to torture them painfully.

Logan Reese, on the other hand, was suffering from another kind of problem. The divorce of his dad from his umptieth wife had costed him more nerves than usual, and he was not going to be over it as fast as usual.

Dana Cruz had tried to talk to him about it, but so far for little avail. She was standing in the queu as well in order to give a demonstration of her current skills in basketball. This did not mean that then tough Latina had given up on cheerleading for the sake of that team sport, but her participatioin in the tryouts served especially the purpose of motivating Logan. She had figured that Logan would not like it if any girl performed better tha himself, and then he would do his best in order to outperform her. Alas, this nice concept had hitherto not yet done the trick, for the problem of the jerk of Beverly Hills was sitting a lot deeper. In any case, Dana was now not as much under a pressure of having to decide for either cheerleading or for basketball, as the steadily increased amount of girls applying for the cheerleading squad allowed it for her to take turns with others, such as Mandy Franklin and Tasha Misa. And after all, Dana was still up to showing the boys that she was able to mess with the football jocks. She did not really want to become a permanent column of the team, as she was disgusted by Coach Keller. But she just wanted to show that she is able to go through the necessary tortures.

As a consequence of his worries, Logan had started turning sloppy with respect to his athletic activities. Before the summer break, he had been a reliable member of the basketball team, albeit only when whipped by team captain Zoey, and when cheered vehemently by Dana. But due to missing his former step mother, he had gone totally depressive. Even his postures had turned awkward. He looked now very clumsy, and this was most evident when he tried to score with his free throws. Already on the first day Logan had not been able topunch Michael into oblivion, as he would have done if he had been in perfect shape. That's why they had to retreat to eating red hot chilli pods in order to determine the winner of the single bed. And now he was even worse than ever before, and he squandered probably all of his chances. Coach Keller would soon lose his patience completely and expel him from the team.

Adelaide Singer was standing at the sidelines, wearing her guitar. Her old school had got a basketball team as well, and one of its members was aforementioned Zachariah Carter Schwartz, a close friend of hers. That's why she had watched many a basketball match, and she was not quite over that habit, although she did not know any of the kids in the team. Now she picked her guitar in order to sing a little song for the players who appeared to need some motivation. She was not yet recognised by many as the one who had already contributed the lyrics of songs that were now regularly performed by the cheerio squad of Pacific Coast Academy. Of course this would change within the next week. She had heard about these trials from her new room mate Quinn Pensky, but the latter was not willing to watch those creeps.

Jennifer Mosely was also standing in the queue in order to try out. As you should remember, she had been somewhat of a maverick member of the basketball team of James K. Polk when both of these schools competed for the state championships. She was more of a volleyball player, but her athletic size and her condition allowed her to participate in several sports at the same time without much sweat. This had been the case in Sanatha Clarita, and Jennifer did not believe that she would slip into the same habits even here. She had applied for the volleyball team of the stingrays as well, and she had been accepted, but not for the position of the captain: Indeed, aforementioned Vaness Tayler was preferred over her. Due to this defeat, she was now in a stinky mood, and shje powered her way across the basketball team with no mercy. There was apparently no bstacle able to stop her.

Zoë Brooks sighed deeply, because she feared now even to lose her röle as the team's captain. She had not seen overly active Jennifer Mosely as a competitor for that job, but new it was almost inevitable. She did not yet sleep well in her new dormitory cell down in the basement beneath Brenner Hall, and with Stacey Dillse as a room mate. She tried hard to make it somehow, for — after all — it was only for one year, before the big flight to Paris.

Coach Keller blew the whistle. "Enough! Mosely is in the team! Reese is out! Matthews and Barret … you run all the way to Sea Bottom and fetch me a California roll … now!" **Sea Bottom**[22:3] was the nearest restaurant with a sushi bar, a few miles off the campus, and another member of the chain run by Pacific Sushi.

Chase and Michael looked consternated, as their nightmare had just started.

* * *

**Chapter 23 Coco's Demise**

* * *

**23:1 The Bounty**

* * *

**23:1:1 Training Machine**

Evelyn Kwong and Quinn Pensky were sitting in their dormitory room, awaiting the return of their room mate Adelaide. They had decided to plant the bee hive into the school garden by the next day, so there was only one more night to be wary. Addie had already been worried about the chances of the bees escaping from their prison, and then hell would have been loose. In addition, the day of the replanting of the old tree was now approaching more and more. Quinn explained the origin of her new race of bees.

They had been cultivated by aforementioned Filmore Bradford, teacher for biology in New York City and passionate scientist. His big project was that of implanting the genes of arthropodes into the human system and overcoming this way many weaknesses of our body.

Evelyn Kwong was a bit surprised, but she deemed that an excellent idea. "Too bad he is not a teacher here, at his own father's prep school!" She shook her head. "See how lame those science teachers here are? Murphy,[23:1], Granger, Bromwell, Beringer …" She shuddered for disgust.

Mindy Crenshaw had already explained how cool Filmore's research strategy was, and she hoped to be able to work side by side with this genius even more.

Addie returned from the basketball tryouts, and she started talking about all the trouble that had been going on in their team.

Quinn sighed. She remembered how she had blown up some old basketball, and how she had knocked out herself when she had been in Zoey's team that had tried to demonstrate that girls were also able to play that game. She had searched the interweb in order to come to the conclusion that at least free throws where based a lot on geometry and physics.

Addie suggested: "Keller is such an incompetent creep, unlike **Coach Peirson**,[23:2] the coach of her old school's basketball team and thus of her friend Zachariah Carter Schwartz.

Evelyn Kwong sighed. "Quinn, I believe you about free throws and geometry. But I have got another idea: You have built such a great machine in order to make office life easier for Dean Rivers. How about a training machine that could even replace Coach Keller?"

Quinn gasped, but she agreed. "An excellent idea … who needs coaches, anyways?" She clapped hands with Evelyn.

Addie shrugged. "You know, I have to prepare for the next campaign for Yumburger. Terrence Bo expects me on the fountain square in order to talk about the song I had written last year at Rocky Road for Robert Hotty. "

Evely nodded. "Anyways — I don't think that Yumburger is any better than my aunt's chain of Chinese restaurants. There's that Hongkong Palace right in your home town, right?"

Addie nodded solemnly. "they are probably all the same lamers. And T-Bo looks totally weird with his bandanna. Things will be worse once my brother will have joined the catering team."

Evelyn remrked: "The bandanna makes him almost look like a basketball player." She giggled in an annoying way.

Addie scratched her chin, pondering, "what if he is a former basketball player, or some similar athlete?"

Evelyn shrugged cluelessly. "That would be interesting, given how much Keller hates the new catering franchise for having replaced Sushi rocks."

Notwithstanding the discussion, Quinn started designing a training machine. She had already invented a few things she wanted now to integrate into the mix: First, there was that tennis ball thrower that fires little balls at the athletes, who were thereupon supposed to catch them with their hands, And then there was a little remote-controlled car racing the basketball field. The athletes would have to catch it, which was not easy as the car was able to change its velocity frequently and sharply. She had invented both of these devices not for tarining athletes, but in order to train various robots, including both the Quinnterruptor and Yamamoto. Quinn and her geeky pals were now up to designing an building more components for the training machine and then try to use it in order to replace Coach Keller.

* * *

**23:1:2 Terrence Bo And Basketball**

Adelaide Singer and Wendy Gellar had finally dared to ask the Jamaican catering merchant about his athletic experiences, and he had confirmed his former life as a basketball star of his high school team, and even later at college. He picked a grapefruit and started spinning it on his fingers, in a way similar to aforementioned Seth Powers from Santa Clarita. Therupon, he threw the grapfruite into a waste basket across the campus square.

Addie applauded wholeheartedly. "That was great! But a waste of grapefruits?" She did not know that the fruit had been a fake, really a model used for the orntion of the cart.

Wendy had thence got a great idea. "This Coach Keller here stinks. Can't you replace him here as a trainer of the basketball team?"

Terrence scratched his bandana. "Really? I am not a licensed coach by any stretch."

Addie expressed that she did not think that this was necessary for advising extracurricular activities. "I would have to ask that Claire girl, though, She kmows all the rules by heart."

Wendy nodded solemnly. "Oh yes, she is such a baby shark with extremely sharp teeth already!"

Terrence Bo shrugged helplessly with his shoulders. "I don't have much time for this now. AS long as my reinforcement isn't here …"

Profoundly disgusted Addie shuddered. "My evil brother, that is …"

Wendy nodded. "He will be soon, and then …"

Addie grinned: "My room mates have just built a machine thatr will make training a lot easier. Less work for a coach, I think."

Terrence adjusted his bandanna slightly. "But I still need a star to sing with Addie during the promotional evening."

Wendy sighed deeply. "Drake Parker has definitely not got the time to do so. His sister Megan told me so." She sobbed.

Terrence nodded. "Bring me some pop star, and I will take over part of the coaching … along with the machine. I guess it is like a smoothie blender!" He started squishing some fruits.

* * *

**23:1:3 Looking For A Star**

Back in her dormitory room, Addie was thinking about a way to find a pop star for the promotional performance. Her friends Megan Parker and Wendy Gellar had joined her in order to help her with the search.

But that was not all: They needed to find a way in order to expel Coach Keller and get Dean Rivers to accept T-Bo as a basketball coach!

Megan suggested: "Coach Keller is already responsible for the football team, and this is a lot of work. They seem to have a great season so far, and it will mean lots of work if they go beyond the regionals. So he would just be forced to concentrrate on the football squad, and then leave the basketball team to much cheaper T-Bo … and the training machine!"

Addie smiled. "That sounds brilliant." So she was still stuck with the need of finding an appropriate pop star. She went through a list of names in her head, but those were all well-established stars, and thus excessively expensive unless you knew their little sister. "Wait, there's a girl down the hall … Lisa Perkins … isn't that the one who sang your song for taht tape?"

Megan banged her head against the wall when she remembered her. "Oh, I should have remembered her. She is now at Pacific Coast Academy?"

Addie nodded solemnly.

Wendy coughed. "You mean the one from _America Sings_? Yeah, she should still be too unknown to be overly expensive, and definitely good enough to please Yumburger and Terrence."

Addie choked. "And my brother, the evil girl groper, once he is here!"

Megan chuckled. "Oh, you need to keep him under control!"

Adelaide Singer shrugged. "Unfortunately, Ben is not like Drake and Josh. He is hard to prank, but rather a prankster on his own right."

Megan grinned. "Oh, I know … how he dragged the cow upstairs into your class room."[23:3]

* * *

**23:1:4 Lisa For Yumburger**

It was not easy for Adelaide Singer to talk Lisa Perkins into singing in publicities of Yumburger, a company about which she had not necessarily heard much good. But a free stick of pickled cucumbers had changed her opinion pretty fast.

During the basketball tryouts, Addie had overheard that Michael had got some crush on Lisa, but he had seen her hang out with some other guy in other places.

Megan nodded. "A really sick crush, if you ask me." She explained: "And it reminds me of a certain someone who had once been hankering like an idiot after Drake."

Wendy went pale, stammering: "Oh … I am over it!"

"Yeah, sure," grunted Megan.

Wendy glared at her friend.

Terrence Bo had got other news he needed to tell. "Yumburger is interested in spending bucks into the basketball team and let me coach it, but only if the name iof the company is printed on their jerseys."

Wendy sighed. "Sounds fair, but Zoë Brooks is in charge with designing the jerseys and accomodating all the advertisements. And she is pretty grumoy during those days."

Megan nodded, and she told Terrence the whole story about Zoey and Chase, the jealousy drama and similar stuff — as least as she knew it.

Terrence shrugged. "Will you negotiate?"

Lisa nodded. "I am sort of a friend of Zoey, and maybe this will work out. By the way, your bandanna is lame. You need a more fashionable one."

Terrence gasped. "What? I have been wearing this one for eight years already!"

Addie goggled. "You see how old it is?"

Terrence sighed deeply.

* * *

**23:1:5 New Training Units**

Coach Keller had been vigorously opposed to letting the team's outfit promote Yumburger. He was still accusing them of having thrown out Sushi Rox. But his protesting actions had been all in vain, as Dean Rivers decided to let the bucks speak.

"Yumburger is ready to sponsor the basketball team, and thus they decide what is on them!" Thus spoke the headmaster upon consulting Garth Berman and the rest of the board of sponsors.

Now there needed to be no further arguments: Coach Keller left his job as the responsible trainer of the basketball team, allowing Terrence Bo to take over.

And now the basketball team was faced Quinn's relevant inventions for the very first time. They were not told that these machines had been invented in order to train heartless robots such as the Quinnterruptor.

But Terrence Bo had also got some additional idea. "Each of you take one of these pointed wooden sticks! Then the machine will fire fake pickled cucumbers at you, which you will impale with it. The one with the greatest amount of stacked cucumbers will win a free blix each week until the end of the academic year!" The basketball players coughed and moaned, but they accepted the challenge, anyways. "Fire! …hey, you can do that better, Matthews … well done, Mosely …"

Zoey grunted noisily, because now even the new coach preferred Jennifer Mosely. But what was she supposed to do?

* * *

**23:1:6 Cheerleading**

I have already pointed out the significance of cheerleading for the recent history of this school. And this year, there was no need for male cheerios at Pacific Coast Academy, nor was it necessary to hire them from nearby schools such as James K.!Polk or Northridge.

Fletcher St. Troy was getting more and more plesed by being responsible for their choreography. The new tunes, composed by Wendy Gellar, did become popular very fast. And what was even better: Adelaide Singer, the author of the lyrics, was now here on the campus, ready to talk to from face to face, and no longer someone unknown far away on the other side of the continent. This was especially important for the pep rallies in front of important matches, as will be seen below.

Natasha Misa was the head of the cheerleading team, but she was challenged by Trinidad Vega. For the squad, this was apparently an important question, probably because of the privileges such as standing on top of the pyramid and kissing the football quarterback after a successful match for the yearbooks.

Of course, the cheerleaders wore fashionable uniforms. Those diisplayed the stingray, along with logos for the sponsors of the football team. During the previous years, Zoë Brooks had got troubles accustomating to the restrictions imposed upon her creativity by those who paid for the whole mess. But she had accustomed to it step by step, although she knew that this was so wrong. The cheerios were supposed to look sexy in their monkey costumes and with their pompons, and they were promoting the almighty sponsors. This sounded utterly immoral, and it made Zoey sometimes puke. After the mess with Chase matthews, she had simply not been able to take it anymore, and she had up on that task. The new cheerio uniforms had thus been arranged hastily by Geena Fabiano, who had been informed about this situation by the way of an interweb chat with Adelaide Singer.

* * *

**23:2 Love And Abuse**

* * *

**23:2:1 Coco Gets Trashed Again**

As aforemnentioned, Coco Wexler lived in a very abusive relationship with Carl Bubba, the poor excuse of a coach of the baseball team of Pacific Coast Academy.

The latter was really the ultimate joke among all athletic squads of Pacific Coast Academy. With or without cheerleading, the guys were worse than dummies. The sponsors had tried to put an end to the team for over a dozen of years already, and they had reduced their financial support drastically since the war of Vietnam. The only reason why there was still such a team was the fast that some alumni were baseball fans, especially supporters of baseball legend **Giuseppe Di Maggio**. Upon the death of this athletic idol of the past, it had not been possuble for the board to cancel the team completely, although they were ashamed by it. And of course it was not possible to hire a start coach for almost no budget. Only a useless jock like Carl Bubba was willing to work in that position. He had recently participated in a program in order to bring back high school droput to a decent career, but he had failed miserably in it.

This had not always been the case, evidently not always been the case, especially not during my worldly life on this campus. The team of Pacific Coast Academy had regularly reached the regionals, and they secured even once the Californian finals. I remember having watched some of its matches. Only during the times of the war of Vietnam did the interest wane, and some rumours had it that there had been a connection with illegal sports bets. Alas, as a matter of fact and as you shall see later, this kind of treacherous business was still alive not only in professional sports, but also in high school athletics, during the times of Zoë Brooks.

Back to Carl and Coco: The creep was habitually trashing his girlfriend every other week, and then force her to reassume that filthy relationship, although she hated his family, especially his most perverted mother. And this was apparently just one other time, although there was something new: Carl had used his mobile telephone in order to trash Coco. He would have probably done it this way before, but his account had often been revoked due to his financial problems.

Whatever the reason for this method of getting trashed: Coco was totally consternated, and she was now lying like a flounder on the pavement in front of Brenner Hall. She had also started weeping, getting the pavement soaked with tears, sweat, and toxic remains of cheap and malodourous toiletries.

Along came Zoë Brooks and Stacey Dillsen, talking about their favourite modern pop artist, termHarold Joyner.[23:4] Stacey even admitted that Joyner was her example to live up to – at least since she had started building models from cotton swabs. Unfortunately Coco Wexler's wretched body cringing on the floor was not exactly an example of fine arts, and that's what the two basement girls were just about to stumble into. Needless to say, Zoey was thoroughly shocked, while Stacey was only disgusted, because she had not yet been accustomed to Coco as much as those girls that had been here for over two years already. The sophomore girls wondered what to do to that chubby mess. But it was obvious that it was impossible for them to let the heap of misery lie on the pavelent. According to Stacey, Coco was close to vomiting, and some unwary girl could pass by and step into the resulting puddle of puke, as had happened to her more than once.

Coco Wexler protested, as she wanted to be left there on the cobbles in order to rot into oblivion by drowniung in her own tears, sweat, and vomit.

But Zoey insisted in dragging Coco back to her apartment. "Alas, I doubt the two of us are enough to lift her upstairs." Unfortunately, she did not know anyone whom she could trust any longer.

Stacey saw no reason to object to this judgment of the present situation. "So we need help? Hey, Jennifer, the tall girl from my woodshop electives, is big and strong."

Zoey glared at her room mate. "Jennifer Mosely? Does she have to be perfect in everything?"

Stacey sobbed in a pitiful manner, but then she was granted the permit in order to call Jennifer Mosely for help.

Zoë kept on trying to talk some sense into the wretched lump of misery, but without much success.

Finally, Jennifer Mosely arrived on the paved sections, and she was thoroughly consternated by the scene in front of her eyes. Then the girls started to drag the shapeless mass of fat and tears away from the fasngerous pavement to Coco's apartment, against her vigorous protests.

* * *

**23:2:2 Dustin Loves Stella**

Dustin Brooks was still shocked by the development Chase Matthews's crush on Zoë had finally taken, and he decided to make it better.

Now he found Stella sitting in the library in order to borrow a book with complicated words for the purpose of preparing better for next speller bee. "Hi Stella … what I always wanted to tell you …" He blushed deeply. Of course, he had not known the cute tween Latina for more than a few weeks, and thus the usage of _always_ appeared a bit exaggerated — roughly spoken.

Stella turned around. "Oh, hi Dustin, nice to see you here. I have heard you are also a speller bee, at least you have been." She smiled sweetly at her class mate.

Dustin coughed and started stammering, "Yes, I am. So what I want to say is … I … l … o … v … e … y … o … u!" He panted heavily.

At first glance, Stella took it as a spelling exercise, but then she blushed back. "Really?"

Dustin moaned. "Sorry if that's a problem …" He coughed again like some old and rusty motor, totally exhausted from his efforts.

Stella sighed deeply. "I have heard stories and you and other girls … Wendy Gellar, Jennifer Mosely, Trisha Kirby, Cassandra Baldwin …that's why I am surprised that you have got so many difficulties with feelings"

It took Dustin some hour and a vast amount of coughing, moaning, and panting in order to tell her about these girls. "I did not love them, maybe Sandy a bit, until I figured that it was all arranged. but essentially, I … I wanted to show Zoey that I am not a little baby." He sighed full of regret. Then he also told Stella about the awkwardness between Zoey and Chase. "That's why I have forced me into admitting to my feelings."

Stella suspired. "That's OK, I don't like being treated as a baby, either — not by my family, not by my agesakes."

Dustin asked: "Does your brother treat you like one?"

Stella shrugged. "Not quite the way Zoey does unto you, if I understand all those rumours correctly. He would not admit to it, just as he does not admit in the public to his hobby: Tailoring and fashion design."

Dustin remarked: "Zoey is a passionate fashion designer as well!"

Stella grinned. "Wow! But it is probably easier for a girl to admit to that." Then she moved her head closer and closer to Dustin's, and she pulled him into a tender hug, whispering sweetly: "I love you too!"

* * *

**23:2:3 More Drama**

The drama club at Pacific Coast Academy was still up and running. Although, due to more important tasks at Hollywood School For The Professional Performance Arts, Erwin Sikowitz was no longer able to run the advising job single-handed, he was still around often enough in order to take care of the business.

He was now assisted by senior **Dale Gregory Squires**,[23:5] who had already published and directed several amateur short movie projects, although he was actually very lazy. How had he achieved that?

Anyways, it was now the right time for the presentation of this year's project: _The Beginning Of A Romance_.[23:6] This play had been written a few months ago by Chase Matthews, and that had been apparently before he had destroyed his life by hiring Trinidad Vega in order to make Zoë Brooks jealous. More precisely: It was written even before he had dated Trisha Kirby and thus started to realise — or maybe just to fancy — that it was possible to make the blond Mary Sue jealous. The play was nothing but an image of Chase Matthews's wishful thinking during his freshman year — well, almost wishful, as the play was partly tragic, in the tradition of Shakespeare's most celebrated _Romeo And Juliet_. The tragedy had consisted in the couple ending up jobless and homeless, but still together.

During the following years, this script would become popular among middle and high school drama clubs across the whole country, because it would be spread over the interweb like wildfire by Chase's friends.

Sikowitz wanted Chase to conduct the performance, as he had done two years ago for his previous play about alien girl Zorca. But the bushy dweeb was definitely not in the mood of doing so. He would have been constantly reminded of the good old times just before he had committed the worst mistake of his life. Yet how was he going to convince Sikowitz of this? His reluctance grew even more once Trinidad Vega had decided to sign up for the auditions for the female main rôle. He still owed her a play or even better a musical, and denying her to participate would have made her even more angry. But directing the practice for the play, with an actress that had ultimately destroyed his life, would have made things even a gazillion times worth.

Chase tried to get Dale Squires to take over these responsibilities, but the future successor of Malcolm Reese claimed that he did not have the time to do so, for he needed to worry about his college picks. The auditions approached rapidly, and Chase was in a hurry. He asked whether any of the fellow students had got any experience with directing the performance of a play.

The only one to raise her hand was Adelaide Singer, and even she had only done so relauctantly. Back in seventh grade, she had been chosen as a director of the school play, rather a musical about the life of pirates.[23:7] Chase had to talk to Addie about those possibilities.

* * *

**23:2:4 A New Boyfriend For Coco?**

While Stacey Dillsen was busy watching the stars, Zoë Brooks and Jennifer Mosely were ready to take care of Coco Wexler, who was now lying on her couch, but still in the likeness of a fat fish stranded on a dry and dusty beach during low tide.

The high school girls were desperate. They knew that it would have been the task of Coco to take care of the girls' dormitory problems, as opposed to the students' job to fix the private life of their dormitory adviser. But they were apparently thoroughly mistaken. And although Coco was such a poor excuse of a dormitory adviser even when she was not depressed, Zoey was was convinced that the girls here would even suffer more when she was not around at all. She also feared that Dean Rivers would have to expel her and sent her back to the slums where she had come from.

Zoey Brooks reasoned that Carl Bubba was no good at all for Coco, and that he was probably the very reason why Coco was such a poor excuse of a dormitory adviser in the first case. But both girld knew that the chubby wench would not get over it or even return to Carl unless she had found another boyfriend by then. And Coco was definitely unable to find a suitable boyfriend on her own. In other words: The girls would have to help a bit, but Zoë knew that she had to be subtle, for she did not want to go through some other disaster of the sort she had experienced with Dustin.

Jennifer and Zoey tried to make a list of unmarried men of Coco's generation on the campus. This was not really easy, as most nice teachers dropped out automatically due to being already married, and the not-so-nice ones — better not think about them! They had thought about Terrence Bo, but they did not know how to arrange it, and so they were going to ask other girls about their ideas.

* * *

**23:2:5 Addie Gets Chased**

* * *

**23:2:5:1 Overworked**

Adelaide Singer and Chase Matthews were the last kid sleft in the conference room of the hall that hosted the theatre stage of Pacific Coast Academy. Addie was still interested in directing the play, although her relationship with Jake Behari had been on the rocks since her move to California, well, for all odds and ends, it should have been considered a failure and cleanly terminated.

Chase had to tell Addie about his life and times at Pacific Coast Academy since the arrival of Zoë Brooks, especially how his feelings had been so much obvious for almost everyone but Zoey, and how he had been too much of a coward to admit it the straight way.

Addie recognised some major paralles to her crush on Jake Nahari, althou there were differences as well. But after all, there had been nothing but huge waves of misunderstandings. Anyways, she understood how Chase had come to feel like this about his play, and why he should not feel tortured into directing its performance. Thus she decided to take the burden upon herself, although her experiences directing aforementioned school play had been but one big disaster that had even got her best friend hurt.

Chase and Addie also discovered that both of them were not only aspiring poets of some sort, but they also admired Edgar Allan Poe as one of their examples to live up to. Addie's favourite was the _Telltale Heart_, something Chase was absolutely able to relate to, after all those embarrassing situations he had already been stumbled into.

It was now already late, and neither Chase nor Addie were able to walk straight in order to return to their respective dormitory room. They tried to stand up, and they hugged each other because they had got such a relieving conversation. But, too weak to make any further step, they collapsed on sit and came to lie on the floor in a tight embrace.

* * *

**23:2:6 Embarrassing Awakening**

The next morning, Chase Matthews and Addie Singer were woken up by Michael Barret, who had been looking here for Chase, after having heard from other members of the drama club that this was the last place where Chase had been seen alive.

They were still lying on the floor, holding one another tightly. This was of course totally embarrassing. Michael looked aghast. "Sorry, I do not want to bother you!" He was already on his way out. Chase tried to call his best friend back, and then to tell him that it was not exactly what it looked like. But he was unable to stop the jazz flautist, and he was already imagining the rumours about himself and Addie that would soon spread like wildfire.

Addie sighed deeply. "Sorry!"

Chase nodded solemnly. "We must have been damn tired." He released a Beaufort 10 yawn storm.

Addie shuddered. "Definitely. OK, let us return one at a time to our buildings."

Chase nodded, as this appeared to be the best alternative. But, deep inside, he was unable to deny that he had got feelings for Addie, for it had never been as easy for Chase to talk about the above things as it had been last night in Addie's company.

Addie did not see it any different, and she had to blush when she was about to sneak away.

* * *

**23:2:6:1 Winged Hearts**

Both of them had already left the building, and they tried to avoid public attention.

But now Chase noticed that he had lost his ballpoint pen. He returned into to the theatre building in order to fetch it. At the same time, Addoe noticed that a pen that was not hers was stuck in her cleavage. Remembering the last night, it was clear that it had to be Chase's. For that reason, she returned straight to the stage hall in order to return it to Chase, who must have still been near there, or at least in order to leave a notice for him. Thus the two of them met again just at the entrance of the theatre block. Smiling Addie held the biro aloft. Chase plucked the writing tool and grinned.

But now he was no longer able to hold his feelings back. "I love you!"

Addie sighed and pulled him into a careful kiss.

All this occurred now in front of some dozen of pupils, and there was no longer a way for them to live in denial. They closed their eyes and started day-dreaming: They were taken away by a strong wind and lifted up to the clouds in the sky, thusly escaping from the increasingly crazy and pitiful mob. They were no birds, but their love allowed them to soar away as if they had wings on their own. Being of the same kind, they were certainly going to find the treasure at the end of the rainbow …[23:8]

* * *

**23:2:7 Auditioning**

The first meeting of the drama club after the embarrassing events was of course more than just awkward for Chase Matthews and Adelaide Singer.

And now it was already time for the auditions.

Many girls wanted to be _Maple_, the female star of _Beginning Of A Romance_. Lola Martinez was the first among them, followed by Ashley Blake and Trina Vega.

About a year ago, Jennifer Mosely had been a overseer at a school play at James K. Polk,[23:9] and she still felt somewhat connected to the scene. Thus she was here in order to try out for a minor rôle. She had also got the idea that theatre could teach you how to match two people in real life.

Sikowitz was explaining the rules for the upcoming audition. "Improvisation s the most valuable skill of an actor. Thus you don't have to learn and recite some given passage of the script for the audition, but you will be given a few catch phrases, and you have to make up your part of a dialogue on site." Then he started juggling with two coconuts.

The girls looked a bit flabbergasted, but most of them wanted the rôle badly, so they had to do whatever was required.

Watching Sikowitz, Jennifer had got some idea. She poked her bench neighbour, who happened to be Lola Martinez, and asked her whether Sikowitz was still single.

Lola looked puzzled. "Ain't you a bit young for …"

Mosely growled: "Not for me, but for Coco!"

Lola smiled. "Oh … sure, why not? Yes, he is!" She panted heavily. "Maybe Coco and Sikowitz could improvise something?"

This was the start of a conspiracy of the girls from Brenner Hall.

* * *

**23:2:8 The Bald And The Not-So-Beautiful**

Lola Martinez had lured Sikowitz into the lounge of Brenner Hall, making him think that it was all about acting:

**_"_**  
Most of the kids have not yet understood the principles of improvisation.

I thought that you better demonstrate them in a real life situation.

We have thought about a scene in the girls' lounge, based on the topic of _The Beginning Of A Romance_.

Your partner for that play scene will be our dormitory adviser, Coco Wexler.

You get it? Coco … you like coconuts, and so …  
**_"_**

Sikowitz deemed this an excellent idea in order to teach the principles of improvisational acting.

Coco had been called into the lounge by Jennifer Mosely. She believed that she was going to be considered for a rôle in some Hollywood movie, and she would have to practise some fluffy scene with internationally renowned star actor Erwin Sikowitz.

For the first minutes, this seemed to work out very well. Unfortunately, the onlooking teenage girls were unable to refrain from loving. Coco fumbled permanently with Sikowitz's hair … well, if there had been any.

This was too much for Sikowitz to bear, for he refused to tell anyone why he had got no hair, or he made up a series of stupid lies — another kind of . He cancelled the whole event.

Coco was in a stinky mood. "Not even Hollywood wants me!" She hated bald men, anyways, and thus the whole arrangement had been for naught.

The high school girls looked consternated. They were almost about giving up and letting Coco either drown in a puddle of her own tears, or maybe allow Carl Bubba to take her back and abuse over and over again until their next temporary breakup.

Zoey would only have to bear this sutuation until the bitter end of this academic year. But her pals would have been left with the consequences of the board's failed human resource management.

* * *

**23:2:9 Trisha Fixes Coco**

* * *

**23:2:9:1 The Pork Club**

Samantha Puckett alias Trisha Kirby had spent many a minute by Coco Wexler's side, usually sitting on some bench and sharing a can of ravioli, or some other meal containing spiced pork. Apparently, both of them were addicted to that stuff.

Since Coco's umptieth separation from baseball coach Carl, Samantha had tried in vain to find Coco in order to continue their common habit. But now she had got finally an idea. "OK, if you are mad at your guy, or at man in general …"

Coco listened patiently, albeit moaning for mental pain.

Samantha continued: "So … simply let it out!"

The chubby wench looked at Sam. "How?"

The bad girl from Seattle suspired. "You know … I work at that junk yard, sometimes at least. There I may trash a lot of old metal, making it burst into smithereens." She looked closer at Coco. "That should soothe your soul, believe me! Well, I don't really believe in crap lie a soul, why would I?" She shrugged. "But it makes you feel a lot better."

Coco was not sure, but she decided to try it, anyways.

Sam wondered, "why did you start that thing with Carl, anyways, you know, … making stuff that you adults do when you are together?"

Coco moaned, "I had once been stuck in some hole … wonder why … and Carl pulled me out of there. He's so manly and muscular."

Sam shook her head. "First, I've got a few muscles as well, and I am a girl — you can achieve the same! Second …" She suspired. "you liked what Carl had done for you, but this does not mean that you have to like him."[23:10]

* * *

**23:2:9:2 Coco Gets Greased**

Greasemonkey Joseph Braxly wondered what was going on when Samantha showed up with the chubby dormitory adviser.

Samantha introduced Coco Wexler unto Joe Braxly. The two of them had already crossed their ways on the campus, but they had never talked.

Now Coco wanted to trash some metal. "How about this can of ravioli?"

Joe showed her how to open it, using some devices from his tool box.

Coco smiled. "Cool! Do you want some?"

Joe nodded, and thereupon he grabbed some of the stuffed noodles with his bare fingers. "Or would it be more polite to use a screwdriver for this purpose?"

Coco did not mind that the greasemonkey's fingers were stained with machine oil. "Yummy!"

Samantha was butchering some car that had been damaged beyong repair in some recent accident. Everytime she did something like that, she imagined that it was the car of some unfriendly teacher. Over an hour passed this way. Then it was finally time for her to return to the campus. "Coco?" She turned around and saw the dormitory adviser making out with the mechanic. Both of them were smeared with grease and some spicy sauce. "Have fun!" She waved at the dults, and then she walked away without bothering any longer. "Good job, momma!"

The next day, Coco Wexler would announce unto Dean Rivers that she was going to quit her job as a dormitory adviser in order to work thereupon at her future husband's junk yard. This would be a shock for the school's administration and the board, but they had it coming, down to underpaying the dormitory adviser for such a long period.

How would Dean Rivers and the board of sponsors of this illustrious boarding school now try to refill the position formerly ocupied by Coco Wexler? They knew fairly well that they would not be able to find a new and competent dormitory adviser ready to work for those excessively low wages. But were they willing to go through the same amount of troubles and complaints again, or would they finally look for a qualified adviser that was paid as much as their male counterparts?

* * *

**Chapter 24 Quinn Resets The Mark**

* * *

**24:1 The Tall Blond Rake**

* * *

**24:1:1 Jake Crandle At PCA**

Many girls fell for the wrong guys, just because of their looks. This had always been the case, and it was more and more obvious since the start of the era of coeducation here at Pacific Coast Academy.

Jake Crandle[24:1] was a tall blond rake that shamelessly seduced and abused unwary girls. He was nowadays hanging out in the greater Los Angeles area, but he had already been in New Mexico, Seattle, and New Jersey. The worst aspect was that he looked and appeared totally innocent. This was probably the reason why so many girls fell for him like flies for fecal matter.

But now he was here officially in order visit some friend on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy: Dale Squires, the aforementioned popular amateur movie producer. And even without trying to flirt, he had immediately gathered a crowd of female studdents surrounding him like bees swarming a blooming meadow full of juicy flowers.

Yet there was a much deeper reason for his presence on the campus than simply visiting some random friend:

Northridge was still desperately trying to sabotage the new era of Pacific Coast Academy. You have already heard about female spies like Courtney Simmons who had snuck onto the campus in order to snoop the school, using false pretenses. This had been efficient as long as girls had been a vast minority, videlicet: Until the previous year. But the strategy was no longer as efficient as it had used to be. Thus the sponsors of Northridge had changed their tactics slightly: They did no longer try to infiltrate the school with girls trying to hit on the male students, but with boys seducing and abusing the female pupils.

Needless to say: Rakes like Jake were perfectly suited for this job. And Dale Squires — while still an amateur movie producer — had already got contacts to one of the most uncompromising players in the label record business: **Phil Hawk**.[24:2] The latter was now one of the most influential sponsors of Northridge alias Eastridge, and he tried hard to ruin the business of main competitor **Gustavo Rocque**, who happened to be a friend of Malcolm Reese, and who was responsible for the soundtracks of some of his bigger movies. Thus the mission of Jake Crandle on this campus was that of espionage, especially one Zoë Brooks, thw girl who had been a barbed thorn in the sides of the board of Northridge. They had been aware of the plain and simple fact that the blond Mary Sue from Louisiana would have been the perfect model student of a school like Northridge — had she not decided to go to Pacific Coast Academy instead.

Did this mean that Jake's primary goal was that on spying Zoë Brooks in order to find her weaknesses and to report them back to Phil Hawk and the admionistration of Northridge? Really, the situation was not as simple. Basuically, all female students on this campus were the target of his mission, and he was supposed to hit not only subtly on Zoey, but also on less popular girls, with the purpose of provoking discord and turmoil among the female students, which in turn was tantamount to staining the new renown of Pacific Coast Academy, who — at least during the last two years — had been working quite hard on building up quite some prestige as a perfect school for both boys and girls during, and thus sabotaging those attempts without a trace of remorses

* * *

**24:1:2 Jake And Cotton Swabs**

Stacey Dillsen was one of those girls. She was now carrying a cotton swab model of the tower of Pisa across the campus. Here she had just spotted Jake, and now she started rhapsodising about him in a penetrant way.

Jake started crawling past her, and then he spotted her tower. The infamous campanile of Pisa was known for not standing upright, but the tall blond rake believed that he had just accidentally bent and squeezed the cotton swab tower. "Sorry … I will repair this for you … promised! My name is … Dennifer … call me Dennifer!"

Stacey introduced herself in the usual manner.

Jake smiled. "I guess I have got some time … tonight!"

Stacey beamed. "At seven post meridiem, we may watch a movie in thew campus cinema while you fix it!"

Jake nodded solemnly. "This is OK!" He was not aware of the fact how easy it had been for him to agree on a date with Stacey, although she was not really his cup of tea. But his mission had been that of taking care of the less popular girls as well.

* * *

**24:1:3 Jake Runs Into Zoë**

Finally, Jake Crandle was done visiting Dale Squires, and now he was feeling increasingly hungry. He had already asked a few boys about a way to the next restaurant, but he had not heard any useful answer, as those guys had feared his competition.

But then he ran straight into Zoë Brooks, and he asked the cute Mary Sue as well for the way to some nice place for having lunch. He made her believe that he had never seen or met her before, although he recognised her clearly from many pictures he had seen of her, both on the interweb and in the yearbooks of the last two years, which he had been shown by **Rebecca Wilson**.[24:3] The latter was a former Northridge Graduate, multiply awarded mixed martial artist, and one of the secretaries of Phil Hawk. The tall blond rake had got some dirty crush on her — a fact that had drawn him deeper into the circle of Phil Hawk.

This time, there was no problem, and Zoey guided him to Yumburger. "Unfortunately, our sushi bar had burned down last year, and it is assumed that there was something fishy."

Jake shrugged. "Sushi bars should always be somewhat fishy."

Zoey smiled. "Hey, that was cool!" Then she lead out Jake to Yumburger. "It's easier to find if you just follow me! I am Zoë Brooks …"

Jake nodded solemnly. "Copol name …nice to meet you. I am James … James Garrett. I am just visiting someone … do you know Dale Squires? That is my friend living here as a senior at your school, and I will probably come to visit him more often, for this campus looks like a paradise."

Here, Jake Crandle had chosen another pseudonym, because he did of course want to hide his polygamous mission. The usage of this pseudonym was a bit critical: _James_ was his middle name, and his mother was a sister of aforementioned Hollywood actor Jeff Garrett. The latter was also known as a big womaniser, and he was certainly among Jake Crandle's examples to live up to.

Zoey shook her head lightly. "I have heard about him, he seems to be some sort of a film producer, or director … but I have not met him from face to face."

Jake alias Dennifer shrugged. "That's OK … wow, those burgers look really yummy!"

Zoey sighed. "Unfortunately, they are very fat, and I do not want to become as chubby as Coco. Thus I will only eat some salad."

Jake scratched his head. "Coco? By the way, you are nowhere near chubby. Eating something would not heard you."

Zoey told Jake about her dormitory adviser, and about all the troubles she had gone through because of that obese wench.

Unfortunately, but of course not surprisingly, Zoey and Jake were not alone at the catering booth. Nicole Bristow and her boyfriend Nicholas Webber had been watching them. The bimbo wench from Kansas was now secure in the knowledge that Zoë had got a new boyfriend, and she would of course not hesitate from starting to spread the news all over the campus of Pacific Coast Academy. Zoë and Jake would have denied that they had been dating, though.

* * *

**24:1:4 Screaming Lola**

As afore,mentioned, Lola Martinez had been offered the possinility of becoming the star of new teenage sitcom _Totally Terry_.

Due to a rivality between Dingo Trust and Reese Productions, Malcolm was not simply willing to lose Lola to that channel, and he was up to raising the potential salary for the Latino diva. Thus he offered Lola another job in his movie _The Squeal_ where Lola would simply have to squeal like a damsel in distress.

Unfortunately, she still needed to practice this kind of screaming, But this was not hard, as she just needed to learn it from her room mate Nicole Bristow, the bimbo wench that was able to scream in a way that made the alert bells ring. Dana Cruz had often nough been forced to stuff the mouth of the insane bimbo wench in order to be able to concentrate on her martial training. Things went worse once Lola's squeals started to scare Nicole, making her scream in return. Dana had got barely another choice than tying them to a chair and stuffing their mouths with bed sheets. But then she started to use some earcuffs invented previously by Quinn Pensky, thusly able to stay in the same room as the screaming lasses.

* * *

**24:1:5 Start Spreading The News**

Nicole Bristow had returned to her room, where she had to talk to her room mates. "You won't believe it!" Her voice sounded totally excited, although this was not exactly unusual uin the case of this bimbo. "Zoey Brooks has got a new loverboy!" She squealed like a fury.

Lola was shocked by Nicole's scream, and thus she squealed back at her. This game went on for a few minutes, until both of the girls were finally out of power.

Earcuffed Dana shrugged. Down to Quinn's invention, she had heard Nicole's normal voice, but not her squeal. "Really? Wow, you're lucky that she did get over Chase that fast, after you had told him to hire a false girlfriend."

Nicole sighed deeply. "Hey, I have seen them at Yumburger's. He is tall and blond and cute … of course nowhere near as cute as Nicholas Webber, but …"

Lola grinned. "good for Zoey. Maybe she is now no longer angry with us." She hoped so, but she was not sure, and so she decided to send some messenger in order to check the situation. "Dustin might know."

This was just the start of the rumours about Zoey's new love.

* * *

**24:2 A Surprise Gift**

* * *

**24:2:1 The Second Anniversary Of Quinn And Mark**

Mark and Quinn had been dating alreay for almost two whole years.

With their second anniversary approaching, Mark had thought about some special gift for the geeky lass from Seattle: A portrait of himself. But in order to produce it, he had needed a good painter. The choice was not too hardto make: Maria Misa was still one of the most gifted visual artists at Pacific Coast Academy.

Painting the portrait would take Maria a few days, if not weeks. But Mark did not want Quinn to know that he was up to making her a special surprise gift. Obviously it would not have been much of a surprise any longer, and Mark loved to surprise his girlfriend.

Unfortunately, Maria would have to meet Mark several times duri ng those days, in order to allow her to internalise the outlines and the relief of Quinn's boyfriend. But in order to distract Quinn, her boyfriend was required to lie shamelessly about the reasons for seeing Maria unusually often.

* * *

**24:2:2 More Bacteria**

While Quinn Pensky had worked already hard on her new sweetener based on those unusual mutant bees, she knew that only appropriate natural ferments would be able to turn their honey into some syrup suited for the production of soft drinks and thence a viable alternative to corn sugar.

The ferments were to be provided by some new bacterial culture which Quinn had mixed for no other purpose than this one. There were several test tubes containing disgusting liquids of different colours. Quinn observed the results as carefully as only possible.

Most people associated bacteria with diseases, and there was also the possibility that Quinn's freshly created germs would have an adversary effect on the human body when incorporated directly, similar to Peruvian puff peppers.

Quinn and her fellow nerds still had to test and to riddle. Fortunately, most of her experiments took usually place in the laboratories of the science club. Needless to say, releasing those germs in a dormitory hall would have wreaked an insane amount of havoc among the students contaminated with or incorporating the same.

* * *

**24:2:3 Jealous Quinn**

Mark Del Figgalo was walking next to Maria Misa in the main class hall for the high school kids. She had to study the outlines of his face in order to draw the contours of his portrait.

Along came Quinn Pensky, and the inevitable just happened: She concluded wrongly that Mark was cheating on her with Maria, and that she needed to do something about it. She decided to ask Mark about what she had just seen. But her uncomely boyfriend just lied shamelessly, making Quinn believe that Maria had just missed out on a lesson, and he needed to provide her with the copies of the notes he had taken.

Quinn Pensky was not sure: Would she believe this lie or not? In any case, see saw no reason to trust Maria Misa, and she fired onbe of her laser zappers, which she had nowadays attached to her wrist watch, right into the hindside of the painter girl. In any case, she was now totally consternated.

* * *

**24:2:4 Quinn Looks For Answers**

Quinn walked into the dormitory room of Dana Cruz, Nicole Bristow, and Lola Martinez. She looked totally aghast. "I believe that Mark is cheating on me!"

Dana shrugged. "You always believe that! You remember when …"

Quinn glared at the bully Latina, but she was unable to deny that this was true. Panting heavily, Quinn told her mates about her observations made over in the hallway. "… and then they hugged. Isn't that a sign?"

Dana shrugged. "Maybe?"

Lola wondered, "whow did they hug? There are many kinds of hugs." She demonstrated those styles with Nicole, explaining in which movie she had seen them, and what it was supposed to mean. "An actress must master them all."

Quinn moaned, "I don't know, something inbetween … maybe … and who knows what they are doing now?"

Nicole started screaming again, thusly triggering an equally powerful squeal released by Lola. Dana was earcuffed, but Quinn wasn't. As a consequence, the geek girl from Seattle startled, vacillated, and — finally — slumped to the floor. Unfortunately, she was holding ine of her test tubes in her left hand. The icky contents of the same vessel were thus spilled, soaking the carpet of the dormitory room. This was yet another reason for Lola and Nicole to start a squealing orgy.

Dana looked angry. "Quinn? hat is that supposed to be?"

Wuinn reacted fast. "Close all m windows, tell the kids out in the corridor to leave the building, and pull the alert lever!" She panted heavily while she got up again. Then she dialed some long number in order to inform the authority for atomar, biological, and chemical disasters. It took her a few minutes to describe the situation for the officers.

Dana grabbed Quinn. "Are you going to kill us all with your … bacteria?"

Lola and Nicole were now finally too much exhausted for screaming, and that was for the better …

Quinn stammered, "maybe? The guys from the authorities will find out. Until then, we will be quarantined … no food, no drinks, no …"

Nicole moaned, "no boys?" She sighed, because she was appointed with Nicholas, Now she needed to pick up her mobile telephone. "May we use those?"

Quinn nodded. "But be careful, we don't know how long this quarantine will last, and the batteries will sooner or later expire. And by then, Maria will finally have achieved stealing Mark completely from me." She sobbed in a heart-tearing manner.

Dana shook Quinn even more violently. "Why don't you waste your mobile telephone's battery in order to call someone to snoop your boyfriend?"

Quinn sighed. "That sounds mean … but that's what I will do! Dustin is good for snooping, he is fairly small and hard to notice."

Nicole suggested, "ask Dustin whther Zoey is happy with her new boyfriend!"

Quinn wondered, "Zoey's new boyfriend?"

Nicole nodded solemnly, and she told Quinn about her observations. "Maybe she is now over the whole trouble with Chase and his jealousy drama." She shrugged helplessly.

* * *

**24:2:5 Agent Stella**

* * *

**24:2:5:1 Splitting Tasks**

Brenner Hall was now empty, barring those four ggirls quarantined in dormitory room 101.

Jeremiah Trottman had already spread the news by the way of his campus television network. Thus most pupils were aware of what was going on.

This included now Dustin Brooks and Stella Rivera, who had just been informed by Quinn Pensky.

The middle school kids were still abit confused.

Dustin wondered, "my sister has got a new boyfriend? I did not know that."

Stella sighed. "I guess you are more curious about your sister's situation than about Mark Del Figgalo and Maria Misa."

Dustin nodded. "I have never understood what Quinn saw in him, and vice versa. But I need to know whether Zoey is over Chase and his absurd farce."

Stella suggested to split. "You take care of your sister, whereas I will follow Mark."

Dustin agreed wholeheartedly with this concept.

* * *

**24:2:5:2 Snooping Mark And Maria**

Stella found Mark Del Figgalo and Maria Misa sitting on a park bench. "What a cute couple," she told unto herself, hoping that Quinn's worst fears were about to come true. "Come on, Maria, kiss the dork!" She grew a bit impatient.

Unfortunately, Stella had to report back to Quinn, and she had a hard time hiding her wishful thinking. "Mark and Maria are going to have some snack at Yumburger!" She heard Quinn's pityful reply. Even worse, talking about food mmade Nicole and Dana feel more and more hungry. Now she was told to follow Mark and Maria to their — according to Quinn's exaggerated fears — candle light dinner for two.

Fortunately, Yumburger's booth was very close to the spit where Stella was still standing, anyways. Indeed, she just needed to spin around in order to watch the supposed lovebirds having a burger or so.

Maria had already done a lot in order to memoise the outlines of Mark's uncomely face, but now she needed to round up by watching it from different angles. She needed to give it some perspective effects. While the portraiot was two-dimensional, she wanted to leave the viewer of Mark's portrait with a three-dimensional impression.

Neither Mark Del Figgalo nor Maria Misa were aware of the very presence of Stella Rivera when they sat down next to Terrence Bo's booth. The latter was ready for their orders.

Stella grinned mischievously, tempted to shout: "One blix — two straws" or "One big burger for two!"

But the two supposed lovebirds just bought one meal for each, making Stella yawn. At tghe same time, Stella kept snaeaking up to them — step by step, one by one. Now she was finally able to listen to their conversions. This way, she realised what was the most probable purpose of the secret meetings of Maria and Mark.

At first glance, Stella should have felt ashamed for having intruded into the private sphere of Mark and Maria, just to figure that they were not really lovebirds. This was a grave disappointment in her eyes. Given that Quinn was such a poor excuse of a girlfriend for Mark, she really wished that there had been a lot more to it. But maybe there was a way to fix that?

Anyways, it was now the right time for reporting back to Quinn. But what did Stella really want to tell her?

* * *

**24:2:5:3 Two Room Mates — One Date**

Dustin Brooks had not hesitated looking for his elder sister, whom he supposed to be in her doirmitory cell in the dungeons beneath Brenner Hall.

In the moment of his entance, Zoë Brooks and Styacey Dillsen were preparing for the evening. Little did they know that they were up tio spending it with the same guy: Jake Crandle alias Dennifer alias James Garrett alias … Unfortunately, the girls were not talking much about their evening dates.

Dustin wondered, "Zoë … is it true that …" He was too excited for talking clearly and in one peace, making his sister wonder about his mental constitution. But then he dared to pronounce it. "You have got a new boyfriend, right?"

Zoey coughed. "How would you think that?"

Dustin explained that he had been informed about the situation by Nicole Bristow, who was certainly not much of a reliable source, but he knew that she was able to recognise her former best friend anong hundreds of girls from across the campus square.

Zoey choked. "James? Hey, we are not boyfriend and girlfriend!" She should have added: "Not yet!" For she was sure interested like hell, although she did not want to admit to it, especially not in front of her little brother, and she was pretty much ashamed because Nicole had been one of the first to know about it. She did not like to be envied by the big mass of girls for a boyfriend, and this would have been inevitably the case with James Garrett alias Dennifer alias Jake Crandle. Thus she preferred into letting everyone believe that she was just nice to some friendly random visitor, although this was definitely hypocritical. "I will see him again tonight in order to show him the cinema and other cool things on the campus he should remmeber … when coming back in order to visit his friend."

Stacey had been listening all the time, and she was not aware of the simple fact that her _Dennifer_ was no other than Zoey's _James_, and none of the girls knew anything about his real identity as Jake Crandle.

Dustin smiled. "OK, if it is just a nicety and not a dat for two, you won't have any trouble introducing him to me?"

Zoey coughed and moaned, but she did not see any other choice.

Stacey suggested, "hey, I will see my Dennifer at the same time, and we will go to cinema thereafter. Why don't we go together?"

Zoey grinned. "Excellent choice! I am really interested in getting to know your boyfriend …" She had actually supposed that Stacey would never be able to find a boyfriend, both due to her weirdness and to her contorted tongue.

* * *

**24:2:5:4 One Rake And Two Girls**

So Stacey, Zoey, and Dustin had finally reached the campus square and were about to take a turn towards the campus cinema. Now the disaster happened: The girls spotted Jake Crandle alias Dennifer alias James Garrett at the same time, and they walked up to him without lookin left or right.

For James, this was duly a problem. Although he had not yet — not even as James Garrett — started dating Zoey in an official manner, he had hoped to be able to fix it right here tonight on the campus.

Stacey glared at Zoey — and vice versa, as they had finally noticed that they were about dating the same guy.

Eve Dustin coughed noisily, because he was finally forced to give up on his hopes. He had dearly wished his sister to be at the beginning of a steady relationship, demonstrating that she was over the whole disaster involving one Chase Matthews. He panted, trying to command Stacey to keep her fingers from Jake alias James alias Dennifer.

The blond rake found his legs, and he ran away from the girls like a freshly-greased flash of lightening.

Unfortunately, Stacey and Zoë were now mad at each other, using words like _boy thief_.

Dustin grabbed his sister. "Come on, Zoey, the creep is not worth it!"

Zoey panted heavily, releasing the cotton swab girl. "Sorry! I should have seen that coming."

Stacey hugged Zoey. "No boy shall ever stand between us."

Zoey nodded solemnly. "I hope so. Except Dustin …for if you need a brother, you have to get your own!"

Stacey giggled merrily.

During the next days, various other girls would confirm that the same guy was a shameless womaniser: Megan Parker, Jennifer Mosely, Adelaide Siger.

For Zoey Brooks, another world broke down, and she was more and more convinced that all boys were just ddirty creeps, barring maybe her little brother.

Dustin sighed deeply, and he stomped his feet. How would he be able to help his sister?

* * *

**24:2:6 End Of The Quarantine**

* * *

**24:2:6:1 Cal Meacham Interferes**

As aforementioned, Jeremiah Trottman's PCA News Channel had covered the quarantine whose victims were Nicole Bristow, Quinn Pensky, Dana Cruz, and Lola Martinez.

Some memberes of the stingray scientists' club had watched the newscast, and they had wondered what to do.

Melinda Crenshaw was one of the first to react. She knew that leaving the examination of the bacteria would take too long, and she did not want Quinn to be locked into a room with angry dummies for a whole night or even more. For that avail, she gathered Wayne Gilbert, Evelyn Kwong, and Lisa Zemo in order to take a look at the situation.

Quinn had fortunately only taken one of several test tubes when she was on her way to Brenner Hall. Thus there were two vessels lfet which contained the same kind of germs. This allowed Mindy and her colleagues to research the danger caused by those microbial creatures.

Well, there was one problem: The laboratory lacked one instrument that would have been necessary in order to perform the crucial tests. Fortunately, Mindy knew that her boyfriend, at least in some sense, had got access to one of those devices in his own labiratory over at Caltech. And now everything boiled down to contacting Cal Meacham, getting him to lend them the necessary apparatus, and performing the required analysis. This would take only a few hours — or so she hoped.

Melinda Crenshaw was lucky: Cal Meacham was easy to reach by the way of mobile telecommunication, and he was in his laboratory. Unfortunately, the device was hard to transport, and thus it was better to do the reverse, videlicet taking a sample of Quinn's germ stock and transport it to Caltech.

* * *

**24:2:6:2 No Danger**

Finally, Cal Meacham had completed the necessary tests, and he had been able to reach Mindy in order to tell her: "It is alright. There is no immediate danger for the human body." He would have loved to talk about the details.

But Evelyn Kwong deemed it more urgent to contact the girls trapped in 101 Brenner Hall. "You may tell us later!"

Cal was also going to inform the office for biologial hazards, making them lift the quarantine.

* * *

**24:2:6:3 Quinn Is Free**

The girls of 101 Brenner Hall were released right in the moment when Stella Rivera was done with her espionage.

For that reason, Quinn did not hesitate a moment and stormed across the campus in order to look after her boyfriend and his date.

Stella interceived the geek princess on her way to Yumburger's. She tried to tell her about te result of her observations, but Quinn was hard to stop. Stella sighed. "Well, Quinn, if your boyfriend had to lie to you repreatedly and risked submitting you to such a terrible situation, so maybe he is not the right guy for you?"

Quinn looked at Stella. "What do you mean? Mark and I … not meant to be? How dare you …" She panted like a rusty steam locomotive. "Yea, you must be right. Boyfriends need to be honest to their girlfriends." She was sweating like a cataract, not only because of her worries about Mark and Maria, but also because being locked into a room with Lola Martinez, Nicole Bristow, and Dana Cruz, even for just six hours, had been worse than six years in hell.

Now it was the right moment for Quinn to do the right thing. She approached Mark and Maria. "Hey, Mark, it is over! I don't need a liar as a boyfriend. That was not helpful!" She glared at Maria. "You may keep your portrait of him … and you may keep Mark as well!"

Quinn was now gone, just like the wind — free again!

But Mark and Maria were still sitting at their tables, watching one another.

Finally, Mark Del Figgalo admitted, "Quinn is crazy. I think that pour relationship had been a mistake from the very start."

Maria Misa sighed deeply. "I am so sorry for you. Maybe you will be more careful when choosing the next girl."

Mark moaned, "actually … Quinn chose me, about two years ago 'textellipsis and she never told me why." He shrugged. "Should I have cared?"

Maria nodded solemnly. "You should know why you like someone, and vice verso."

Mark panted heavily. "Quin n and I have never talked about it. She always talked too much stuff that does not interest me, and I don't even get a word in."

Maria sighed. "That's sad. In a relationship, you should be able to talk openly with your partner, and it should go both ways."

Mark sobbed, and then he realised. "Too bad, there seems to be only one girl that even listens to me when I have to say something."

Maria wondered who that was.

Mark blushed profoundly, and then he glared silently at Maria. His eyes started inflating to pulsating hearts.

Maria started melting away. She purred and pulled Mark into a lingering kiss.

* * *

**24:3 The Right Chemistry**

* * *

**24:3:1 Zoey's Hate Subject**

It was time for the kids to prepare for the next written exams.

Zoey Brooks was not in the chemistry classes of Mrs. Bromwell, along with Chase Matthews and Logan Reese. She needed to pass these exams well in order to make it to a decent college after graduating from high school, upon graduating from Meudon Prep near Paris.

But really, the problem was just her inept teacher, who was utterly unable to explain things right. With a decent teacher like aforementioned Sweeney, Zoey would not have run into that sort of troubles.

* * *

**24:3:2 Worst Exam — Ever**

Bromwell had just returned the result of the test, and it was no fun for the goody-two-shoes from Louisiana

Zoë Brooks was consternated: She was left with the worst mark she had ever received so far in any written test. With such result, she feared for not getting admitted to Harvard. She asked Mrs. Bromwell for a project for extra credits. But the dumb matron refused to grant her such a thing, which was clearly against the rules of Pacific Coast Academy. Instead, Zoey was told to look for a tutor. Unfortunately. the blond Mary Sue agreed on this. Mrs. Bromwell had already got someone on her mind, but Zoey was allowed to look for a tutor on her own.

* * *

**24:3:3 Jennifer's Idea**

Zoë Brooks had talked about her need for tutoring to her freshmen friends Je Brooks, Lisa Zemo, and Jennifer Mosely.

Lisa was a geek girl, and she knew certainly a lot about chemistry, but she would not have been able to tutor Zoey because you needed to be a geek in order to understand geek talk, and Zoey was nowhere near qualifying as one of those. She had made especially bad experiences with Quinn Pensky, but the same would have been the case for about every member of the science club.

Jennifer Mosely remembered how badly her former boyfriend Edmond Bigby had sucked in science classes, especially because of his messy notes taken during classes. Mr. Sweeney had showed Ned a _golden_ notebook, which he had claimed to have been written by a student named Mr. Gold. Really, the notebook had been by Sweeney himself, but tNed was nopt supposed to know it. Thereupon, the dumb student had done everything in order to steal the notebook before the next test. He had succeeded and finally learned from it, allowing him to pass the next test with a perfect score.

Bigby had also gone through a lot of tutoring and projects for extra points. He had written some sort of a diary, called _Ned's Declassified School Surbvival Guide_, which we wanted to publish during the current academic year. Jennifer and her friends that had also graduated from James K. Polk Middle school, and thereupon switched to Pacific Coast Academy, were now ready to spread the word from mouth to mouth, prepareing the distribution of said survival guide.

Jennifer believed that Zoë Brooks was even easier to motivate than her dum b ex-boyfriend Ned. She just wondered how to do so. It was of course not possible to tell the blond Mary Sue to break into the middle school in Santa Clarita and steal the golden notebook of Mr. Sweeney. In addition, the notebook had been for middle school classes in chemistry and was probably of little use for high school kids.

* * *

**24:3:4 Claire's Intervention**

Fortunately, Ms. Mosely did not even have to do anything.

Claire Sawyer, future layer, had threatened to sue Mrs. Bromwell for violation of the paragraph that granted each student a project for extra credits. This way, the inept wench of a teacher was forced to give in.

Zoey had not asked Claire to do so, but she accepted the revision, anyways. Alas, now she was stuck with a suitable project. Many Californian kids would have built a mini vulcano in order to improve their score in science.[24:4]

This had been especially the case at James K. Polk, under the auspices of Mr. Sweeney. Jennifer had almost ruined the building with one of hers, because she thought it needed to be bigger than any other mini vulcano in order to earn her a better mark.

With all that in mind, Zoë returned to her dormitory cell in the catacombs of brenner Hall. Upon her arrival, she spooted Stacey work on yet another cotton swab model, wondering what it was about. Then she told her room pal about the problem with her chemistry classes and earning extra credits.

Stacey sighed. "At my previous school, I made a model of a molecule, using cotton swabs and glue, in order to harvest a few points. Not much, though." She sighed.

Zoey gasped. "Thanks! That is the idea!" She was a passionate fashion designer and tailor, which was also some kind of constructrive arts, just like Stacey's cotton swab sculptures. She remembered especially her own creation of fanciful backpacks, back when Nicole had spoiled one in the campus shop. Now it was obcious for her what to do: Design and tailor a backpack adorned with models of chemical molecules.

* * *

**24:3:5 Tailor Made**

While there was not yet an official club for textile creation at Pacific Coast Academy, a few kids had started hoarding supplies for this purpose, such as needles, yarns, scissors, and stuff like that, in a dedicated storage room.

Zoë Brooks was now ready to pick something for her project, and she had already envisioned some shapes, colours, and so on.

Jerome Crony was also around in the same room, because he needed to tailor a few costumes for the cheerio girls. "Hi, I am not here!" He hastily tried to hide the piece of cloth he had been working on for a few minutes already.

Zoey gasped. "Hi! Wait! I see that you are here! You are Oli Biallo, the friend of Michael, right? And you have were part of the basketball team oif Polk's … hanging out with the rude jerk Loomer!"

Crony went pale, but then he chuckled. "Great friend!" He and Michael had never talked again since the premature end of their middle school ball date.

Alas, neither Zoë Brooks nor Jerome Crony alias Olivary Biallo alias Malshal Rivera recognised that they had been dancing together in the moonlight at the very same night they had been talking about.

Zoey was not easy to be distracted. "Come on, show what you create!" Upon a further gaze, she noticed that it was rthe new cheerio outfit. "You design them? That is cool!" She smiled.

Finally, Crony started talking about his long term hobby. "But they will always believe that I am a girl if I pursue this business." He explained that his connection with Loomer had been just a way in order to distract from this fact.

Zoey sighed deeply. She would have loved to talk to him more about the unholy stuff. But she did have to move on and design her new molecular backpack style.

* * *

**Chapter 25 Football Scandal**

* * *

**25:1 A Great Football Team**

* * *

**25:1:1 The Rise Of Vincent Blake**

The football team had improved steadily since the switch of Pacific Coast Academy to coeducation, especially due to the cheerleaders. But thos pompon-swinging and squealing girls were hardly the one and only column of a successful football team.

More than anything else, talented football players were needed. And Pacific Coast Academy had got a bunch of them.

But the most outstanding football jock of this year was Vincent Blake, the elder brother of aforementioned Hollywood starlet Ashely. He had trained very hard since his nursery school time, and he had already been in a bunch of athletic teams at elementary school. Upon reaching middle school, he had been allowed to the football team of Pacific Coast Academy, although it was regularly only accessible for high school students: Vince had needed a medical attestation confirming his physical and psychical fitness for this demanding sport. Needless to say, only very few stingrayt students had been accepted into the high school team before the official minimum age. In Vincent's case, Dr. Glazer Brooks had issued the required documents.

Alas, Pacific Coast Academy was a prep school with high academic standards as well as a huge phalanx of athletic stars. And even the latter were required to fulfill certain minimum requirement in order to stay in the athletic programmes, which provided its participants with a huge bunch of unusual privileges, such as skipping curricular classes for the sake of additional practice time for impending athletic challenges.

Needless to say, those requirements were often a huge obstacle for a great amount of the jocks — especially members of the football team and other disciplines emphasising raw muscle power. For some of them, including Vincent Blake, the only solution appeared to be cheating in tests. This had already been the case during my lifetime, but this had been more and more the case during the previous years. Of course, there were rules against cheating at Pacific Coast Academy, but they only applied for those bullies who had been caught and convicted.

Alas, as a matter of facter, students and teachers witnessing a cheating quarterback were hardly willing to report or denounce the fraud. First, they would be considered traitors by all the fans of the stringray football team. Second, they would have to fear for their very life, given the danger emanating from the bulging muscles of the football jock.

Vince was cheating it about each and every academic test, and he had not yet been caught. But thus he had turned unwary, and it was just a matter of time for him to get caught. Yet his status made it unlikely for him to have to fear any consequences for his misdeeds.

As a quarterback, Vince Blake was the most desired boy on the campus. The horny jock was also flirting with a huge amount of girls at the same time. This did not just include the cheerleaders, but about each and every high school lass standing in his way. This included also Zoë Brooks and Stacey Dillsen. Those two undergrund girls argued regularly about their chances of getting to date the hot jock. They had even astarted making stupid bets. The Mary Sue tried to sabotage any of Stacey's plans of approaching Vince, and vice versa.

Dustin had come to hear about it, and it made him very sad indeed, because he knew that guys like Vince Blake were no good for Zoë. She had just been disappointed by Jake Crandle alias James Garrett alias Dennifer, and now she was jumping from the frying pan into the pot of boiling water.

* * *

**25:1:2 Other Players**

Of course it was clear that quarterback Vincent Blake was not the one and only member of the football team.

As you have probably guessed, Logan Reese was in the team as well, although he had to fight hard in order to maintain a spot in the first squad.

Even useless guys like Michael Barret had made the cut in the tryouts. The reason for this was not his skill as a football player, but the fact that coacj keller wanted to abuse him more and more for having ste Sushi Rox ablaze. Michael was only used in tough matches as cannon fodder and a bait for the opponents, and he got regularly bruised and clawed into pieces by the hostile team.

Most of the players had to struggle with the same problems as Vince Blake. In addition, the season was long, and the expectations were high. So how were those guys supposed to make it all up to there?

Dana Cruz, on the other hand, would have loved to make it into the team, but girls were still not accepted here. Sooner or later, the team was likely to regret this most absurd policy.

Anyways, the team had reached the playoffs for the state championship, and they were thus already so close to winning that title, unlike any previous stingray team, so there was little public interest in abolishing this archaic and sexist restriction.

* * *

**25:1:3 The Team Medic**

Of course, athletes engaging in rough sports such as football were likely to be subject to injuries of various kinds when practising their hobbies.

One of the privileges of the football players were those of being partly, or even largely, excempted from the usual health care system prevailing at Pacific Coast Academythat has been described already a lot earlier up the road. In addition to a nice physiotherapist, there was also a specialised sports medic for those athletic teams: Dr. Joe Wheeler.[25:1]

He was also a dentist, and as such responsible for all students at Pacific Coast Academy with problematic teeth. This was especially valied for Dustin Brooks, who had ruined his teeth with those candies he should — according to his sister — not even eaten in the first place. Little wonder, Zoë Brooks was so furious in her campaign for healthier snacks.

Little did the students at Pacific Coast Academy knew about the past of Joseph Wheeler. If theu had been, some of them would have been consternated.

Joseph Wheeler had been the court medic of the **Kingdom Of Miranda**,[25:2] a small constitutional monarchy in the heart of South America.

This state had been a brooding place of corruption and scandals, and Doc Wheeler had been involved in more than just one of them. The real person in power was not the king, but the chancellor that had come to power by a military revolt. The king had continued representing the state, but no more than that. The whole royal family was nothing but a bunch of prisoners in golden chains.

Unter the auspices of Doc Wheeler's friends, Miranda had been involved in the illegal trade of Southern American food that was illegal in the United States, such as Peruvian puff pepper and Bolivian ham.[25:3]

After yet another revolt, the chancellor had been made to flee, and he had taken over the government of Polynesian island state Yerba.[25:4] This dictatorship would only end a few years later by the way of an invasion of submarine units of the US airforce, commanded by **Stephen Shay**,[25:5] the father of aforementioned Carly Shay. This miltary operation would be necessary because of repeated incidents of US citizens kidnapped and locked up against all international laws by the Yerban government.

Even after the Mirandese revolution, the cooperation between Wheeler and the Chancellor had contiued, albeit behind the scenes. Among other things, Doc Wheeler had abducted two of the newborn babies of the Queen of Miranda: Prince Fredward and Prince Toplin. He had simply denied the triplet pregnancy and left the court with but one baby: **Prince Gabriel**.[25:6] Prince Fredward became known as **Fredward Benson**, the son — falsely so-called — of **Marissa Benson**, nurse and midwife at the court of Miranda when Wheeler was their court medic. Prince Toplin was grabbed by Doc Wheeler's brother, and thus is now known as **Toplin Wheeler**.[25:7] Fredward Benson and his mom were now living in Seattle, next door to Carlotta Shay. Samantha Puckett was somewhat familiar with that horny creep. Toplin and his — falsely so-called — brother **Thornton Wheeler**[25:8] were now living in San Diego.

All this will tell you what a creep Wheeler was indeed, and why a person like him should not have been allowed to serve at a high school as a medic of whatever sort. But things were even a lot worse than just that…

* * *

**25:1:4 Doping At PCA**

Ad now there was the ultimate secret of the recent improvements of the football team of Pacific Coast Academy:

Not only did Doc Wheeler treat the wounded players with poultices and plaster casts, but he also took care of supplying them with certain medical substances whose usage was outlawed, not only in the national football league, but also the Californian association for high school athletics. Some of those substances were not available in the average pharmacy down the street, but they had been brewed especially for the purpose of increasing the performance of athletes in certain disciplines. Aforementioned Peruvian puff peppers, smuggled to California by Mirandese dealers, were secretly prepared for the purpose of doping. Yet this was just a fairly mild case.

Vince Blake — for example — was submitted to the practice of **blood dopinf**, _a technique which increased the density of erythrocytes in the athletic blood_, thusly boosting the endurance and the explosivity of the athlete.

Of course there were regular checks by independant medical officers, but there had always been many ways to bypass these annoying control measures. Some methods were legal in the case of particular indications. Doc Wheeler faked the documents for some of his athletes.

Some of the means of doping had been hitherto only used by the stingray teams. Those had been supplied by now other than one of the leading stingray sponsors: Blix Soft Drinks. Some of their products were prepared with potions who effected the improvement of the performance of the bodily functions. Unfortunately, Quinn Pensky and her research group had contributed a lot to the development of those illegal potions. But she had not even been aware of this, as she had always intended to work on the solution of the problem of hunger and thirst in the world.

An example of the means of doping invented by Quinn Pensky was aforementioned Frazz. This drink was now available for sale in all well-assorted groceries licensed by Blix Soft Drinks, as Quinn had toned it down. But in its original form it had been excessively powerful. The trick was that of combining the openly available version of Frazz with some other Blix product.

These days, Quinn Pensky was in charge with the development of yet another Blix drink supposed to be used for pushing the limits of the performance of the athletes. The main exotic ingredient was the syrup-like juice of the rhizomes of some plants. This somewhat sticky liquid is a complex carbohydrate that approximates the sweet taste of sugar, but is not digestible by the human body. Thus it may be used for certain dietary purposes. It was also useful for regulating and manipulating the level of blood sugar. Doc Wheeler wanted to use the latter effect for training purposes. Unfortunately, the substance was extremely addictive, comparable to cocaine.

It was not easy to get this juice. The closest source were extremely rare Mexican cactus plants from the wastelands of **Guadalapecho**.[25:9] The Spanish colonisation of Mexico had been endangered when soldiers had learned from natives about the secret use of that juice.

So you know about the usage of illegal substances on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy, but did the school admimistration know about it? If they did, were they trying to fight it, were they tolerating it silently, or even encourage this deprecable practice?

Well, this interesting question was not quite easy to answer. Dean Rivers, for example, knew that both Blix and Schneider's Bakery were taking care of a decent nutrition — as he believed it — of the athletes of the stingray team, and he thanked them for doing so. But he should not have stopped there and suspected that there was something foul and fishy.

* * *

**25:1:5 In Flagrante Delicto**

One nice evening, Chase Matthews was forced to return to the class rooms for history in order to fetch his notebook which he had carelessly dropped there. He needed it desperately in order to learn for the looming test about the independence war. A janitor allowed Chase to slip into the room for a few seconds, enough to fetch the scribbles. He was shocked when he figured that he was not alone in this class room.

His teacher for hisrtory was a certain Mr. Toplin,[25:10] who had already announced thr exact day and hour for the mid term exam. He had left the folder with the sheets for the upcoming test in his drawyer, without locking it. And now Vincent Blake stood next to the open drawer, and he used his mobile telephone with integrated camera in order to take pictures of the test. This was of course illegal and a reason for severe penalties.

Chase gasped, and then he disappeared as fast as only possible. He was now struggling with the thought of denouncing the popular quarterback of his football team — or to shut up and let him get away with it.

Alas, wasn't it weird that the drawer had been unlocked, and that Toplin had left the upcoming test alreasy inside? Indeed, Toplin had left it open precisely in order to let the jocks copy the upcoming tests and thus obtain marks necessary in order to be allowed to enjoy the aforementioned privileges. And this was neither the first time Toplin had committed this misdeed, nor was he the only teacher doing so on and off in order to give the jocks a chance. Just like Vince's fans among the students, many teachers did not want the football team to fail right before the biggest moment in the history of the stingray football team. This was not — or at least not only — because Toplin and most of the other teachers were fanboys and fangirls of the stingray football squad. Quite the contrary, there was some huge pressure resting on them. The board had announced to reassess the quality of the teachers right after the football league finals. The way the speakers of the board emphsasised the vicinity of the football match and the reassassment made it plausible that they would have made the teachers responsible for a failure of the team, with subsequent suspension and cutting down on the salaries.

* * *

**25:2 Moon Bars**

* * *

**25:2:1 Unhealthy Snacks**

Many snacks were sold on the campus, usually by those evil vendor machines. And as you probably remember, most of them were utterly unhealthy products sold by companies such as Schneider's Bakery, one of the first sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy — as you probably know too well by now.

Jennifer Mosely remembered when she had organised an action in order to protests against a similar misery that had occurred at her former school. **Vice Principal Crubs** had commanded the removal of fruit cereal bars from the vendor machines in the hallways, replacing them with those powdered miniature doughnuts he was apparently obsessed with.[25:11]

Zoë Brooks admired the consistency of Jennifer's incessant efforts. "The main problem here seams to be that one of our most reliable sponsors, Schneider's Bakery, wants of course to sell its own products, by the way of vendor machines. They will never allow for snacks produced by their competition, and that includes your fruit-cereal-bars."

Jennifer gasped, realising that she would not only have to organise some resistence against the school's administration, but against the mighty feeding hand of the whole prep school — both literally and figuratively. But overly motivated Jennifer was not giving up that soon.

Zoë Brooks was more impatient. "If the headmaster does not do anything, we have to look for healthier snacks, and to distribute them secretly among our fellow students."

Claire was not sure whether this was a good idea. She recited all the relevant passages in the book of rules: guidelines and regulations for commerce on the campus.

Zoey sighed deeply.

Jennifer Mosely wondered: "What if we distribute them gratis? Then kids will see that there are tasty yet healthy alternatives to those ping pong, mini doughnuts, white fudge, fatcakes, …" She shuddered for disgust.

Claire shrugged. "Still, they don't grow on trees."

Lisa Zemo suggested: "So … we have to order healthy snacks for a huge amount of bucks… and then distribute them gratis?"

Zoey sighed deeply. "Maybe I will find some cheap offers on the interweb."

* * *

**25:2:2 A Stubborn Headmaster**

Zoë Brooks, Jennifer Mosely, Lisa Zemo, and Claire Sawyer visited the administration office in order to complain officially about the absence of more healthy snacks in the vendor machines, the cafeteria, and catering services.

Secetary Beverly recognised immediately that the girls were calling for troubles, but this was in vain: She was unable to stop their progress.

Zoey was the speaker of the group, and she explained her objections to the current range of offered snacks unto the headmaster.

Rivers was playing a game of miniature pool on his desk. He rebutted the girls' suggestions without a hesitation, and emphasised that the school was profiting greatly from the sales of those sugar bombs.

This was probably true — if you equate the interests of Schneider's Bakery with those of Pacific Coast Academy. But the latter was an institution responsible for the education of young people, which implied especially a great deal of responsibility for the health of the pupils. And Claire Sawyer knew very well that this goal was even stated in the book of rules that had been established already by the foundation father of Pacific Coast Academy. Likewise, the contracts with the parents confirmed the existence of such a responsibility. The future lawyer wondered whether it made sense to sue against the school's administration for the violation of such a fundamental point of the contract.

* * *

**25:2:3 Secret Deals**

Zoey and her friends saw thus no other way but a conspiration in the back of the school's administration. They had already checked out something on the interweb, which was called **Moon Bars**.[25:12] "Cheap and healthy … if we order them in huge amounts." Jennifer sighed. "As if we were that rich …"

Claire Sawyer read the web site more carefully. "Here in California, we may even order a certain amount gratis!" Moon bars were produced and marketed by a company from New York City. California was still a marketplace for the company to be explored, and thence they were trying to research the possibilities. For that reason, a certain amount of moon bars was granted gratis, but the customers were required to fill in a certai form about their experiences with this new product. Claire Sawyer read the smallprint of the contract with **Moon**, the producers of the moon bars. The contract was full of pitfalls, but the girls refused to listen to the warnings pronounced by the baby shark.

* * *

**25:2:4 Poor Taste**

Unfortunately, it was now too late anyways: A cardboard box chock full with moon bars had just arrived on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

Zoë Brooks and Jennifer Mosely opened it eagerly in order to take a bite. The very next second, they felt the need to empty their stomachs. Fortunately, they were close enough to the window. It was impossible to believe that the kids would want to buy something like that.

The girls would have been able to avoid all these troubles by asking Adelaide Singer about her opinion, as you will see below. Yet they were still forced by their contract with the moon bar company to offer the bars to a diversity of customers and collect their opinions about them. Alas, it was so obvious that they would not make any friends by offering them a bit from the moon bars.

* * *

**25:2:5 Spicing Up**

Lisa Zemo had got an idea: She knew about Quinn Pensky's extracts from that plant, and how they would be certainly able to improve the flavour of the moon bars, but without adding any fat or digestable carbohydrates.

Unfortunately, the geek girl from Santa Clarita was not aware of the deeper reasons for the research Quinn was conducting, at least not more than the very Quinn Pensky herself. Even less was she aware of the addictive character of the sticky cactus juice.

But Zoey Brooks, Jennifer Mosely, and Claire Sawyer approved of the idea.

Fortunately, Melinda Crenshaw would discover the danger emanating for everyone from the cactus juice, soon enough to dissuade Zoë and her henchmen from using it in order to spice up the moon bars.

Quinn would soon disprove of using cactus juice, anyways, as will be seem a bit later down the road.

* * *

**25:2:6 Ashley Blackmails Chase**

Ashley Blake was most consternated when she had heard that his brother had been caught cheating by Chase Matthews, and that the latter was totally up to denouncing him to the school's administration. She had already been looking forward to seeing Vince and his football pals beating Chase into tiny smithereens.

But her friend Megan Parker had dissuaded her from promoting this act of violence. "Chase Matthews has done so much for you. Just think of all the scripts and libretti he wrote — for plays you are starring in!"

Ashley had been flabbergasted by her friend's reaction, but she had to think about it, albeit in a reversed manner.

Now she had caught Chase in his hallways, and she growled at him. "You don't really want to denounce my brother, do you? After he had got almost all of his bones cracked, his muscles torn, his guts contorted in order to increase the renown and honour of our school, and to ensure the continued support of our sponsors … you would be worse than Benedict Arnold — or even Judas Ischariot! I can't and I won't let you do that. Do you know how many syringes got stuck into his veins, and how many pills went down his throat, in order to …"

Chase stammered, pretending that he did nnot know what she was talking about.

Ashley glared at the playwright. "You know very well that your plays would be nothing without competent actors and actresses able to portray your characters."

Chase choked, but he was not able to deny the correctness of her statement. "Probably?"

Ashley remarked, "OK, so you think your characters are easy to portray, and you will find another actress? Don't even think about it! Your plays are extremely hard to perform, and if I refuse to portray your characters, they won't be worth the ink an paper you waste on them."

Chase was all of a sudden feeling sick. He limped to the nearby toilets in order to puke the living crap out of his stomach, then we went pale. His world turned dark, and he slumped mercilessly to the floor. Unfortunately, this was the girls' bathroom, so he would be in a whole bunch of troubles.

Later, he would dragged out of the toilets by Quinn Pensky, Lola Martinez, and finally also by Danaz Cruz, which would be a painful and even more embarrassing procedure.

* * *

**25:2:7 Feeding The Jocks**

Megan Parker was glad because Chase was now no longer willing to get himself butchered by the disappointed jocks and their fans. But she did not approve of the fact that a member of a successful football team got away with whatever isdeed, as opposed to us normal people.

She remembered how her useless step brother had become first the equipment manager, and then — by some stupid incident — the coach of Belleview's football team. She had used that in order to punish the football jocks for their arrogance:

Josh had baked brownies for the football players, but Megan had secretly added some dirt to the dough. The unwary jocks had swallowed those cookies wholesale, and they turned sick from those.[25:13]

Now Megan had heard from Dustin Brooks that the moon bars ordered by his sisters tasted very bad, and they had even made the girls vomit.

Her plan was thus very simple: distribute gratis moon bars to the football team, including especially Coach Keller. This way, those jerks would finally get what they deserved.

* * *

**25:2:8 Interesting Vomit**

The jocks had swallowed the moon bars wholesale and emptied their stomachs on side.

As Doc Wheeler was out of town, they needed to consult a different medic. The school nurse was not an option. But one of the players knew that Quinn Pensky was working as a henchman for Doctor Glazer, nd thus they decided to call ther into the cabins in order to check the situation.

Quinn Pensky took samples of the puke. She needed to examine them in the laboratory room of the scientists' club in prder to figure what was wrong with the guys.

The result would be flabbergasting: The stains of blood that had made it into the vomit contained significant amounts of illegal substances used usually for covering the usage of other illegal substances, and some of those had been the results of her own previous research: The coconut-flavoured essence, Frazz, the honey extract, …

The geek queen from Seattle looked consternated. She realised immediately how much burden was now on store for her brittle shoulders.

She could have denied that she had spotted anything, but then she would sooner or later not have been able to watch her own face.

On the other hand, if she published her discoveries truthfully, she would have become the next Arnold Benedict, and the legitimate heir of Judas. Her fellow pupils would hacve hated her, the football players would have sent her death threats, and the board would not have approved of her actions, either. Blix would deny everything and even make Quinn responsible for having invented those essences that had been used in order to push the limits of the football squad in some hitherto unequaled manner.

Not long ago, she had broken with her boyfriend of two years. Back then, she had already felt down. But now she knew that this was nothing compared to the situation she was now stuck in, down to her curiosity and her medical skills.

OK, what did she really know about the situation? She had figured that there were illegal substances in the blood of some member of the football squad. She did not yet have the foggiest clue as of how they had made their way over there. Likewise, she had not got the data allowing her to tell which of the players was doped. There was no reason for her to react right now, and she hoped that everything would turn out as nothing but just a big misunderstanding.

But Quinn Pensky's hopes were almost zero. After being removed from the girls' bathroom, Chase Matthews had told her about Ashley Blake's unpleasant visit. The annoying diva had talked about syringes and pills, which sounded tantamount to admitting that Vince was treated in an irregular way. But she knew that the bushy dork was often enough totally confused, and he must have been when breaking into the girls' toilets. So he had not necessarily meant what he had said. Even more, the tween drama queen was not unlikely to exaggerate shamelessly in order to make her brother look like a hero. Thus Quinn was stuck with a chain of not exactly reliable witnesses, and these circumstances stoped her hopes again.

Now it was time to tell the football guys that they were not sick, and that the only reason for their vomit storm was the taste of the moon bars.

Likewise, Doctor Glazer was awaiting her report, and he would probably charge quite a few bucks for the diagnosis that no medical treatment — barring perhaps a few legal vitamin pills and dextrose in order to recover from puking — was needed.

But soon again, one jock would break down, and then the whole disgusting mess would have to be rumicated.

* * *

**25:2:9 Vince Steps Back**

Ashley Blake met her brother in front of the players' cabins. She was usually let through, because nobody wanted to mess with a Hollywood diva and little sister of a quarterback.

Vince wondered what she was doing there, because he knew that there must have been an urgent reason. "Do you want to see my latest scare?"

Ashley shrugged. "Not if it is because one of your fangirls bit your ears ornose you while making out uncontrollably."

Vince sighed. "No, it ain't"

Ashley told her brother about her recent conversation with Chase Matthews. "I am sure he won't tell anything to Toplin." She did not know that Toplin had left the drawers open on purpose, but she supposed that it had been the case, But she was also secure in the knowledge that the teachers would deny anything, and that they would sacrifice Vince Blake in order to save their own butt, once it came down to it.

Vince sighed deeply. He appreciated what Ashley had done for him, but he would have preferred if she had told him about it beforehand. Adhley had moved in dangerpus waters, because Chase was — in Vince's view — insane and sociopathic. After all, he was still her bodyguard. Unfortunately, both football and his curricular activities kept him busy, and he felt having neglected her often enough, both as a brother and as a bodyguard.

Back then, Vince had not volunteered for becoming his sister's bodyguard, but he had been forced by their mother. Ashley Blake had got a bodyguarrd before, but he had turned out as an abusive creep. Mom Blake trusted family members most, and thus it was natural for her to tell Vincent to guard his younger sister. And this job had worked out perfectly until Vince had started training more than usual in order to win the trophy for Pacific Coast Academy.

Ashley's statements had also made him think about other things, such as his frequent injuries. They had always healed very fast — or at least that had been his impression. But would this always be the case? Was it worth all the cheating that was going on? Even before Ashley's intervention, Chase had told Vince that he would not denounce him unto Dean Rivers if he promised to desist from cheating. Vince had ignored this offered compromise, but now he thought it was not a bad thing, after all. Of course it would not have been possible without stepping down from his unworldly efforts as a quarterback, leaving him time to heal properly, to take better care of Ashley , and to look for a tutor in order to make up for the classes he had missed out on. "It is time for me to take a break from special training!"

Ashley glared at her brother, but she had to respect his decision. "You are still a hero!" She grinned. "Piggyback ride?"

Vince nodded, then he started carrying his little sister on his shoulders. "You are growing fast!"

* * *

**25:2:10 Handmade Candy Bars**

As it seemed to be impossible to purchase huge amounts of snacks that were tasty and healthy at the same time, there seemed to be only one last resort:

Zoë and her friends had to produce suitable snacks on her own. The former James K. Polk students knew fruit-cereal bars that appeared to fit the bill. But the kids would have to come up with their own recipe for those bars. It would certainly take them some time in order to come up with one and to produce the first snacks of their own brand. But it would be worth the trouble.

The girls started already gathering suggestions from the interweb, and it was a really tough search.

In the meantime, Addie Singer told Zoey about her former experiences with moon bars.

**_"_**  
They are very popular in New Jersey, or at least the local publicity campaign says so.

My friend Zachariah Carter Schwartz had made me and Geena taste them. He is an ecopacifist freak, and he is thus ready to swallow those environment-friendly snacks.

But the nerves in my tongue are not ready for such a step. Ditto for Geena …

Geena and Zach have now broken up — properly because of the moon bars.

**_"_**

Zoey understood that there was a long way to go, and she did not want to lose a boyfriend because of different tastes, either — if she ever found one again.

* * *

**25:2:11 Save The Last Bar For Me**

But not everyone here at Pacific Coast Academy was disgusted by the healthy yet tasteless snack from the northeastern states.

Marshal Rivera alias Olivary Biallo alias Jerome Crony had found one of those left behind in the cabins by Vince Blake. Of course he was attracted by the name of the snack, and he waited until the arrival of moonlight. Then he unwrapped the bar, shoved it between his teeth, took a joyful bite, purred, and swooned in delight.

Was this the secret of the bars: You have to eat them in the moonlight in order to be able to enjoy them for real?

Crony was now praying for the purpose of seeing the moon goddess once again in order to share a moon bar with her. He still did not know that she was no other than Zoë Brooks, the girl that had surprised him in flagrante delicto in the tailor's storage.

* * *

**25:2:12 The New Quarterback**

Of course, Vincent Blake's decision to slow down for a while was not really welcome.

His team pals felt let somewhat down, and they urged him to reconsider his decision.

But Vince stayed tough. "Dave will be the new quarterback. It will be worse for you if I break down during the matches, because I feel I can't take it anymore."

Senior **Workout Dave**[25:14] had been the quarterback before Vince, and he was practicing a rude style with little elegance.

But this meant that other positions in the team would have to be refilled. Comisar,[25:15] one of Vince's closest fellow players, was really uncomfortable.

Vince panted heavily. "Why don't you simply let the girls take over those positions? Dana Cruz for example, and even that Trina Vega."

His pals glared at each other. Was this really the right moment for breaking with a solid tradition? The next matches would tell, and the expected opponents were quite strong: Belleview, James K. Polk, and some teams from Frisco, Frescno, and other middle Californian regions. Each strong arm and leg was needed in order to bring on what the crew had started many a month ago, and to bring down what was in their way.

But Vince's choice would turn out the right one: Dana Cruz would whip the badly wretched team to the victory in the state championships. Yet this success was tainted by Wheeler's doping campaign.

* * *

**Chapter 26 Knocking Out**

* * *

**26:1 The New Dormitory Adviser**

* * *

**26:1:1 The Selection**

Not long ago, Coco Wexler had finally had found the courage to abandon her underpaid job, by the way of which she had been nothing but a constant nightmare and embarrassment for the female students of Pacific Coast Academy, in order to live with her new fiancé on his junk yard and support his work.

While her fellow dormitory advisers, who had hitherto been responsible for the two other dormitory halls of the female students at Pacific Coast Academy, had been forced to work extra hours in order to make up for the lack of their former colleague, it was clear that this was not a situation to be born on a permanent base. The parents of some of the girls had been aware of the subsequent problems, and they had urged the administration of the prep school to replave Coco in a more competent manner as fast as possible, or a lot of girls would have dropped out from Pacific Coast Academy at the end of the academic year.

The board had been forced to looj for a substitute, and they better refrained from making the same mistake that they had already committed by the way of hiring a cheap and unskilled Coco Wexler. This was hard to swallow for Leo Bradford, but he had to take the bite and spend more money thn originally envisioned into project of filling the gaping vacancy.

Within a few weeks, many women from all over the United States Od America had applied for this job at one of the most elitary schools in the country. Although the vacancy had been announced on the interweb, most canditates had been alerted by the way of oral prapaganda and connections, especially powerful social networks established by the alumni of Pacific Coast Academy. We will return to those real or virtual fraternities just a little later down the road.

Interviews had been conducted either here on the campus, or – alternatively — by some of the most reverred alumni of Pacific Coast Academy near the residence of the respective canditate for the vacation.

Finally, Dean Rivers was made to compare the folders compiled by the interviewers and other experts abput those applying for the job. So what did Rivers know about the whistles and bells of advising boarding school girls? The answer was simple: Next to nothing, as he had not grown up with any girls at all. His main criterion was the confidence he put into the references named by the canditates. Following this rule, he came very fast to a result.

* * *

**26:1:2 Marissa Benson**

The choice of the headmaster was no other than aforementioned Marissa Benson from Seattle, the emerald city in the commercial and cultural heart of the state of Washington.

You have probably guessed who was her main reference: No other than Dr. Wheeler, the dentist and special purpose medic of Pacific Coast Academy. He had been an alumnus of Pacific Coast Academy and an elder of one of the most renowned student fraternities serving the students of this most illustrious boarding schools, the hammers, which we will have to inspect not much later. This had been the reason for his exciting international career, spanning from the Kingdom Of Miranda to the campus of Pacific Coast Academy. We have already seen some of the excesses of his bloody business.

Officially, Wheeler had run his own dentist's practice in downtown Seattle all the time since his graduation from medical school. And there he had come to know Marissa Benson, a filthy young woman from downtown Seattle. When it had turned out that his duties as a court medic of the kingdom of Miranda had exceeded his capacities, he had called Marissa, a trained caretaker primarily of the elderly, to South America in order to assist him. Many surgical operations practised by Wheeler had been long since outlawed in all states of America, but they were still profitable and thus applicable in the royal country in South America, which was really a thinly-concealed military dictatorship exerted by aforementioned cancellor.

Marissa had been in particular repsonsible for the pregnant wife of the prince of Miranda, who had been inaugurated into the office of the king just a few years thereafter. But then a rebellion of conscripted soldiers had overthrown the Chancellor's rule. While the wife of the prince had been pregnant with a triplet, Marissa Benson and Joe Wheeler had simply made the royal family believe that there had been only one heir. This allowed them to abduct two still unborn princes and transfer them to the United States Of America with faked documents. Their plan was that of abusing the abducted princes in order to take over the Kingdom once again. Upon her return to Seattle, Marissa Benson had worked as a caretaker of the elderly people in the downtown of Seattle.[26:1]

As soon as the departure of Coco Wexler had been confirmed by executive chairman Garth Berman, Dr. Wheeler had not hesitated asking Marissa Benson to apply for the job. The creepy woman had been a bit reluctant, but she finally accepted the great challenge and applied successfully for the job as a dormitory adviser for the high school girls of Pacific Coast Academy.

* * *

**26:2 Society Of The Silver Hammers**

* * *

**26:2:1 Roaming Elders**

According to Logan Rees, elitarian societies were the key to social life both on and off the campus. They really made the difference between the winners and the losers. Of course, _elitarian_ may mean something different for everyone, and in the case of Logan Reese, it meant probably lots of money and stupidity.

The **Society Of The Silver Hammer**[26:2] was one of those snobbish societies operating primaryily on high schools and colleges in the southern Californian counties, especially the illustrious prep schools such as Pacific Coast Academy. It had been around already during my life time, and my experiences with them had certainly not been of a very pleasant nature. In their public presentations, they considered themselves as a jumping board for young people looking forward to occupy an influential position in the modern society, videlicet one that required responsibility and determination. This included careers in the world of the high commerce, politics, science, mass entertainment, and sports.

Many very important people in California had started their career as members of this exclusive society, including some of the chief operating officers of the major sponsors of our school.

Needless to say, a membership in that club was considered highly desirable by most students at Pacific Coast Academy, and not only by Logan Reese. The latter considered it as a given that he would not only a member, but even one of the elders, due to his financial power.

So, how did you become a member? It was not something you could actively apply for, in the likeness of signing up for one of the regular extracurricular activities. Rather, the elders of the society were to choose you. Once a year, those established members made a secret list, and then they roamed the campus, armed with a silverish-looking hammer. Whenever they found someone mentioned in the list, they knocked him lightly with the blunt tool, and the canditate was given a little box containing some silver sticker with the emblem of the society, which was — of course — a hammer. The lists were secret, and thus the students did only know that they had been selected once they felt the knocking and held the silver pin in their hands.

But as you should have figured by now, the illustrious fraternity of the silver hammers was actually nothing but yet another instrument of the sponsors to ensure that their interests were forced upon the students. This was not only the case at Pacific Coast Academy, but here, on the campus of a school that understood itself already as exclusive and illustrious, the simple scheme of an exclusive society worked best. And the almost all executive officers of the companies sponsoring Pacific Coast Academy on a regular base had been former hammers that had made their way by using the fraternity's renown and contacts.

* * *

**26:2:2 If I Was A Hammer**

* * *

**26:2:2:1 Time Of The Year**

And this was the time of the year when the elders were watching out for potential new members of the society.

There did not seem to be a fixed rule, but most members got knocked into the society as sophomores. Little wonder, these teenagers were now especially excited and looking forward to feeling the silver hammer on their head.

Logan was of course already convinced of the fact that he was the neophyte hammer par excellence. But in order to make sure that there was absolutely no way around picking him, he resorted to bribing one of the elders, and he even wore his best suit when doing so. But said elder did not take the bribe, claiming that the silver hammers were not corrupt. Really, this was nowhere near the case. But that was another story altogether.

Another foolish claim made by the jerk from Beverly Hills was the statement that the hammers would not accept female members. This had indeed been the case until the war of vietnam, but times had changed in the seventies. The reasons for this were similar to the switch of Pacific Coast Academy to coeducation: selfish and hypocritical. But there had been hammers even at girls-only Northridge the other hand, there had never been any female commanders of the society of hammers — due to the same stupid prejudices as those promoted repeatedly by Logan Reese. Of course there had been no female hammers at Pacific Coast Academy as long as the school had been reserved for boys. And during the first two years of coedication, female students had been rae and far between, thus the hammers had not been able to consider many of them. But this year, the situation was about to change massively.

* * *

**26:2:2:2 Zoey Brooks**

Zoë Brooks thought especially about the effect a membership in the society of the hammers would have had for her curriculum vitæ once she applied for a decent college, such as Harvard's. She was by all means the most well-known and popular girl on the campus. Alas, her recent troubles and disappointments by boys had started to cast some shadow on her personality and her appearance.

* * *

**26:2:2:3 Lola**

Lola Martinez was fascinated by the list of Hollywood stars that had gone through serving the silver hammers. Certainly, everyone at Pacific Coast Academy had heard already a lot of her and seen at least some of her commercials. And as a hammer, she would be beyond any doubt see her portraits published by more and more journals and magazines across te country, not just here in California.

* * *

**26:2:2:4 Quinn**

Quinn Pensky fancied that the Nobel Prize committees favoured former members of societies such as that of the silver hammer. And after the successful run of the Quinnterruptor against the warrior droids of other Californian teams, she was certainly alreasy someone that had provoked the attention of the elders. This was even more the case as she had now accomplished another giant step towards the goal of building a power palnt able to supply the whole campus with enough electricity for several years to come.

* * *

**26:2:2:5 Stacey**

Stacey Dillsen was secure in the knowledge that the silver pin would open her the door to the greatest art galleries in this world. She was not yet as famous as her room mate Zoey, let alone Lola or similar divas, but she hoped to be able to attract the elders' attention by the way of carrting interesting cotton swab models across the campus.

* * *

**26:2:2:6 Chase**

But not all pupils were looking forward to the selection.

Chase Matthews, for example, understood that this kind of societies were plain stupid, and they could not make anyone better than he or she was, had always been, and would always be. He was totally confirmed in his attitude by his perfect girlfriend Adelaide Singer, who had decided long ago that it was better to remain unfabulous.[26:3] In many works of their literary idol Edgar Allan Poe, aristocrats, or the elite of te society, lived hidden in dark strongholds, and they were compelled to guarding dark secrets of uncertain origin. Being a member of such a society was tantamount to being buried alive.

* * *

**26:2:2:7 Michael**

Michael Barret, however, was a treacherous fence sitter. On the one hand, he did not see a reason why Chase's assessment of elitarian clubs in general could have been flawed. On the other hand, he wanted to impress his secret crush Lisa Perkins, although he should have seen that this could only end on the long run in a big catastrophe. Thus Michael feigned to agree wholeheartedly with Chase, but he was looking for a way of sneaking into the society of hammers past his best friend's radar.

* * *

**26:2:2:8 Lisa Perkins**

Lisa Perkins appeared to be a nice and gentle teenager, but deep inside, she was as much of a jerk like her fellow teenage pop stars, such as Drake Parker. For the time being, Zoë Brooks and her friends were not able to see past her façade, but upon her first public victories in shows like _America Sings_, her true colours would shine. This was the case because the expectations of the record levels and their subsequent pressure exerted upon the confirmed talents either automatically turned superstars into utter jerks or made them perish mercilessly, if they weren't meant for the business in the first place. Now she hoped that being knocked into the club would help her with her career and cause more viewers of casting shows to vote for her sake.

* * *

**26:2:2:9 Fire Wire**

Like Chase Matthews, Wayne Gilbert alias Fire Wire was totally critical towards the silver hammers. In his eyes, the illustrious club had got a lot in common with some groups of villains in some of his favourite graphic novels by _DC_ and _Marvel_. He was not worried because those leagues were known as evil. Wayne did not believe in the vulgar distinction between heroes and villains. Rather, he critisised sternly that the silver hammers was just a blasphemically poor immitation of the prototype of secret fraternities he knew from his graphic novels, but thgey did not implement the spirit of those conspirative circles, and they abused the occult atmosphere they tried to spread for purely worldly purposes.

This will be seen easily in the terms of _Gospel According To Matthew, 21:18__–__22_, a parable in which the Lord curses a fig tree that does not yet bear fruits, just leaves and twigs. Like the religion of the pharisees ad scribes of the law, the spirituality of the fraternity of the silver hammers was fruitless and worthy of doom.

* * *

**26:2:2:10 Vince**

Vincent Blake would have certainly been one rock-solid canditate for a membership among the hammers, like all those years ago. But he had lost some of his popularity upon stepping back from his duties as the captain of the stingray football team. Clearly, he wished to be accepted in spite of this turn, for he knew very well how many professional football players owed the start to their career to the connections of the hammers.

Fortunately, Dana Cruz and Trina Vega had hitherto not disappointed, turning out as valuable reinforcements able to patch the seam left in the team by his retreat. But this would not impress the elders that much.

* * *

**26:2:2:11 Dana Cruz**

So, this bully Latino girl was the spark of fresh hope in the stingray football team: Dana Cruz had come, pbserved, and conquered a place in the team. She was not a full time player, but the team knew that they were able to rely on Dana if times were rough, and the stingray athletes needed to know exactly what was their task to accomplish for their team.

The leaders were certainly equally impressed, and there was little doubt they would consider giving her a chance, too.

Of course Dana expected a boost for her career as a future profexxional cheerleader, athlet, and top model, as she knew several examples of hammers that had made such a career.

* * *

**26:2:2:12 Nicole Bristow**

By contrast, the wench from Kansas was not interested in this club. She did have her dreams of becoming a cellebrated mask artist at Hollywood, but she would not have done just everything for it, because she was now able to enjoy the little things as well. This is by no way paramount to saying that Nicole had developed. She was still the ditzy bimbo she had always been and would always be . She just had figured the necessity of sacrificing something in order to achieve what she really wanted: A career in the beauty business, and even if it was a country barber's shop in Kansas. She was fully supported by her boyfriend Nicholas Webber.

* * *

**26:2:3 Mark And Maria**

Beyond any doubt, Mark Del Figgalo was among all the current sophomores of Pacific Coast Academy the one least aware of the existence of the illustrious fraternity of the silver hammers, let alone their significance and the fact that they were about to recruit new members.

His new girlfriend Maria Misa had heard about them, but she was not eager on joining them. Granted, she knew that many popular visual artists were verteran hammers. But she did not want to succumb to popular taste like most modern artists whose works you found in the renowned galeries sponsored by companies whose exectutive officers were former hammers. Rather, she wanted to develop and follow her own style, and this was not possible for an artist shaken by public opinion like a reed in the wind.

Maria's sister Tasha, on the other hand, had tried to do the same trick as Logan Reese: The cheerio girl bribed one of the elders in a seductive manner. And exact;y like Logan, she did not get away with this attempt of corruption. But that did not mean that the fraternity was clean.

* * *

**26:2:4 Vanessa Tayler**

Vanessa Tayler was not sure whether the hammers were such a good thing. She like the prospects of getting her career — as a professional cheerleader and volleyball star — boosted in an eclatant manner. But she remembered the times when Chase Matthews, Michael barret, and Logan Reese had run that stupid bet. This was her idea of a secret club: They talk in a way that made them sound out of the leagfue of the normal student, although they were just idiots. She did not understand how girls like Zoey Brooks or Lola Martinez were willing to humiliate themselves in such a manner.

* * *

**26:2:5 Knocking On The Heaven's Door**

Zoey Brooks had been the first among the sophomores of 2006 to be knocked and granted the silver pin that marked her officially as a postulant of the elitarian fraternity of the hammers. Unfortunately, she had not seen the particularly tight connections between the network of sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy and the elitarian fraternity.

Lola Martinez was the next girl to follow the same road. But she was not sure whether uit would be a good idea to be in the same club as the blond Mary Sue.

Vincent Blake was the first male sophomore of the current year to be knocked into the society. But it was evident that the elders had been a bit reluctant.

Chase Matthews had been knocked against his will. Logan, on the other hand, had been skipoped for the above reasons. And when Chase trashed his pin, Logan picked it up in order to sneak into the secret fraternity through the backdoor. Still acting hypocritically, Michael had to hide his pin from Chase.

Dana Crux was knocked as well, but rumours had it that this had ben the case because the elders of the fraternity of the hammers were thoroughly intimidated by her martial skills.

On the other hand, Stacey Dillsen was denied access to the society of hammers — the hard way. The messenger of the elders had been annoyed by the cotton swab fairy who had annoyed him constantly with a hand-made cotton swab model of a silver hammer. Stacey had tried to impress him by offering the model as a gift for the fratermity's hall. Unfortunately, not everyone shared her taste, and this donation was definitely not appreciated by the elders. The messenger had hit Stacey hard over her head with the silver hammer, making her drop unconscious.

Likewise, Quinn Pensky had not been very successful when trying to impress the elders by showing them her plans for an autonomous system of power plants supplying the future campus of Pacific Coast Academy. She had deployed too much nerd talk to be understood by those simpletons, and she had been talking incessantly without letting anyone get a word in.

* * *

**26:2:6 Postulancy**

This was the first reunion of the freshly-recruited members of the team. They head been blindfolded before being guided into the large reunion hall.

The elders welcomed the postulants, albeit in a cold and uncanny manner. Already this demeanour should have alerted the newbies. The moderating elder was supported by a gong player and a triangle player who used their percussions in order to control the session. But they were often mistaken and beat their instrumnts in the wrong moment. This underlined that the mettings were not following a carefully planned protocol, or that the elders were unable to concentrate on it.

The moderator was now reading the names of the postulants, one by one, and he allowed them to take off their respective blindfold.

Logan Reese had snuck in, dressed with Chase's outfit, and wearing a bushy wig. He pretended to be Chase, whose pin he had stolen. But his disguise was too easy to unveil. He was thrown out again.

Dana Cruz did not want to stay without her boyfriend, and thus she left the union hall on site, spitting at the hall guard on her way out. The moderator was consternated, as he had never seen anything like that happen.

But the protocol for the admission of the postulants had to continue. This procedure required even more percussions, though. And the latter upset the moderator even more. Now he had to announce the next step of the admission process: Each of the newbiews were assigned some sort of slave task they would have to perform for the elders during the next week. Those jobs were written down and hidden in silver envelopes.

One by one, the postulants had to open their envelopes and read their task.

Zoë Brooks was in charge with feeding the elders. Lola Martinez was sentenced to shaving those guys. Michael Barret's job was that of caring for their stinky teeth. Vince Blake was forced to wash their feet.

* * *

**26:2:7 The Loganites**

Logan Reese and Dana Cruz were still upset because the jerk of Beverly hills had not been allowed into the secret club, and thus they decided to found one on their own. He had gathered the canditates in 148 Maxwell Hall.

As usual, Logan insisted in giving the clan a name: The **Loganites**. And just as in the case of the hammers, there was also a form of trials.

Logan declared that all those willing to participate were forced to cross the campus, wearing nothing but their panties. "The girls are allowed to wear a bra or bikini top as well!"

Chase Matthews was not willing to join, and thus he left the room on site. he had been at the reunion just because he happened to live in 148 Maxwell Hall. And his friend Mark Del Figgalo followed him to the lounge, ready for a match of pool billiard.

Only Logan Reese, Dana Cruz, and Trina Vega would pass the test.

* * *

**26:2:8 Slave Jobs**

Needless to say, the girls and boys that had been admitted to the next stage of joining the illustrious society of the silver hammers were by no means pleased.

Zoey Brooks was of course thoroughly disgusted by having to feed the elders, but even worse, she was forced to listen to their stupid conversations.

The guys wondered where to go for spring breaks. One of them wanted to decide whether to go skiing in Aspen, Colorado, or to go surfing in Acapulco, Mexico. Another guy talked about going to Europe during the same break with his new step mother. He was advised by one of his fellow elders to visit Florence, the city in the heart of the Tuscany, the culturally outstanding region of Italy. Actually, spring break was much too short for an appropriate visit to Florence, though.

This hurt Zoey a lot, because she had to think about her impending departure to France, and all that for more than just a short break. The last two and a half years of her life passed once again in front of her eyes. In addition, Florence was one of the cities she had often been dreaming of, due to its supreme relevance for the history of arts. Granted, her new goal, Paris, was also great in this very respect: Meudon had been a residence of marvellous sculpture **Auguste Rodin**, whom Zoey admired to some degree. Versailles, the artistic luxury parc of absolutist monarch Louis XIV, was certainly in her reach, and so was no less renowned Louvre, one of the absolutely supreme museums of art, hosting master pieces such as _Mona Lisa_, the perfect painting by **Leonardo Da Vinci**, Zoey's most adored master of renaissance arts. And this made her think even more about Florence, the main residence of da Vinci. Even today, this metropole of the Tuscany was associated with modern arts, including fashion design.

But there was little time left for dreaming, as the hard and dirty job of feeding the disgusting elders had to be accomplished before anything else.

Lola was even more disgusted by her job. She had expected to shave the skin of good-looking boys and make them look even a bit hotter. Having a boyfriend like Drake parker did not prevent her in any manner from doing so. But she was forced to shave not only the face of the elders. One of them was a member of the school's swimming squad, and this meant that she needed to shave his whole body in order to reduce the friction of his body against the water.

Michael Barret was forced to take care of the teeth of the elders, and he even discovered a few traces of early paradentitis. He was even more disgusted by the whole stuff.

Vince Blake did not only have to wash the feet with soap and water, he also had to massage the space between the toes, and that he needed to do very carefully. He thought that this was a cool thing to do, for he expected to be an elder some day, and then he would enjoy the same treatment from the hands of neophytes of the clan of the silver hammers. Then he had to polish the nails of the toes of the elders, and he had to lacquer the same in some different colours. This job went too far for his taste, because he wondered what sane guy wanted to colour his toe nails, and even choose girly colours such as pink for that purpose?

* * *

**26:2:9 The Decimation**

The week of humiliation had come to an end, and the selected boys and girls were ready to get accepted into the club of clubs.

The elders were already present, along with the gong player and the triangle freak.

Zoë Brooks was disgusted by the mere thought of those percussions. "They should learn some decent music from Megan Parker."

But the elders did not really care, and they continued the ceremony. They praised the slaves for having successfully completed their trial week, and they were now to pass to the final step. But each year, one of the neophytes had to be rejected, even though they had all passed the trial week.

So, who was the unlucky neophyte that had to be dismissed? The rules of the illustrious club prescribed that the neophytes that had passed the trials were to select on from their midst to get excluded from the club. This was a relic of older rites of **decimation**, prescribing human sacrifices, as performed by the ancient Roman army, as recorded by ancient scribe **Livy**. The republican and imperial Roman army had been one of the examples used in order to structure the clan of the silver hammers.

Zoë Brooks was consternated, and she decried the practice as perverse and abominally. Then she stomped her feet and walked out on the club hall.

This meant that the remaining neophytes were all excepted, but they did not look comfortable with all that, especially because the percussions caused them to lose their nerves. Most of them left the club after a few minutes, some of them sooner, the others later.

In the end, Vincent Blake was the last one to stand. But for the elders, this was a big catastrophe. They did not know how to report the events to the central headquarters of the illustrious society, as tonight's event would have disjointed the Pacific Coast Academy's branch of the clan of the silver hammers. They decided therefor to accept even Logan Reese, Dana Cruz, and Trinidad Vega as new members of their awkward club.

* * *

**26:2:10 Give Me Moon Light**

Seeing that the hammers had been but a gust of hot air, Zoë Brooks was as disappointed as can be. And now she walked the campus, almost all alone. Night had already fallen, and the lamps were activated, yet the moon was slightly clouded. Zoey sighed deeply, and she feared that, inspite of two years in paris, she had just ruined her future, for nobody wanted an employee that had told off the elders of a most renowned fraternity. She knew now that the sponsors were not to be trysted, but she would have tried to reform the structure and ethics of the huge enterprises from within, once she would have been given a chance to do so. Now all hopes were gone, and she was going to stay a nobody forever, or so she figured.

Jerome Crony was sitting on the rim of the fountain. He looked nervously at the sky, hoping for the clouds to pass away. He had still got one last moon bar up his sleep, and he was still waiting for the moon goddess to show up, allowing himn to accept and share his sacrifice. But the clouds worried him. "Give me a sign, big mistress of the moon!" He suspired. "Give me the moon! It makes no sense to hide it in a pocket, where it is not able to shine."

In that moment, Zoey passed by the former bully. And — as if by a miracle — the clouds started dissolving, letting the moon shine brightly.

Crony gasped. In his understanding, the moon goddess had heard his pleas. He had begged for the shining moon, and it had been granted, on a silver tablet.[26:4] He gasped, jumped up, and he fell on his knees, right in front of the blond Mary Sue. "Please, mistress of the moon, accept my humble offerings!" He held a moon bar aloft.

Zoey startled, but then she smiled, as she recognised the guy from the middle school dance of her first year at Pacific Coast Academy. "A moon bar?" She sighed deeply, remembering the poor taste. But she did not want to spoil everything right now, because she felt still flattered by bveing considered a goddess, or was she already willing to assume that she really was a lunar deity?

Crony broke his moon bar into half, and he gave Zoey one of the pieces before starting to chew the other half. He started swooning in delight.

Zoey sighed deeply, but maybe — or so she guessed — the bars taste differently for true believers in the power of the moonlight. She smiled and took a bit from the hitherto deprecated snack. And all of a sudden, she knew that she had been wrong when badmouthing the bars. After enjoying her half of the abr, she started dancing once more with Crony, until both of them fell gently asleep in one another's arms, coming to lie on the pavement next to the sparkling and bubbling fountain. Their faces were now bathed by the tender moon light.

* * *

**26:2:11 Beautiful Dreamers**

That Saturday's night was coming to an end, and the two moon worshippers were still lying next to the unfabulous fountain without having bein awakened by anyone or anything, including some stray drops plummeting into their face.

Wendy Gellar and Adelaide Singer were up really early, and they were noow crossing the campus. Adelaide was carrying her guitar, ready to sing a song or two. The reason for their early movements were the fact that Wendy was confused about her feelings for much older Michael Barret.

Megan Parker had seen the unlucky Jazz composer slumping to the ground like a wretched lump of plumb and concrete. Michael's attempt of impressing Lisa with a membership in the fraternity of the silver hammers had failed as miserably as can be, and this would cause Lisa to ignore him completely and hang out with winner guys, such as Dale Squires. Of course, the latter was a whole lot more suited for the future pop icon, because he did not share Michael's insane fear of standing in the spot lights.

Wendy had tried to catch Megan in order to watch a video with her, but she was thusly informed about Michael's miserable situation. She remembered how much she had suffered from being rejected over and over again by Drake Parker, and it was evident how similar Michael's situation appeared to be right now. Lisa Perkins was as much of an arrogant superstar as Drake, although she did not yet show it as much as Megan's evil brother.

Chase and Addie had taken care of hapless Michael, but only Wendy's intervention had really helped, because both Michael and Wendy were aspiring composers.

And now Wendy had to talk to Addie about all that. But on this Sunday morning, they did not get far ithout stumbling right upon Zoë Brooks and Jerome Crony alias Marshal Rivera. They noticed how the two of them were still mostly asleep, yet already muttering about the moon.

This made Adelaide Singer grab her guitar and strum a popular folk song by **Stephen Foster**. Wendy Gellar smiled and started to sing along, but not without sending simulataneously some interesting short message to Stella Rivera.

**_"_**  
Beautiful Dreamer  
Wake unto me!  
Starlight and dew drops  
Are waitin' for thee.

Sounds of the rude world,  
Heard in the day,  
Lull'd by the moonlight  
Have all pass'd away!  
**_"_**

Zoë Brooks woke up a bit, and she still smelled the moon bar on her tongue. Otherwise she would not have believed that it had happened, and she would have thought about having slipped from one dream into the next. And then she realised in whose arms she was lying. "Crony? Is that really you?" She choked slightly. The dream was over, and now the blond Mary Sue was faced with the question: "Was it just a flickering midspring night fairy tale, or is this some perennial fire?"[26:5] She was shocked, not because it was Olivary Biallo alias Marshal Rivera alias Jerome Crony by her side, but because she had not recognised him in rthe moonlight.

Crony was still dazed, and he had to go through a similar inner inquisition. He had failed to recognise the Mary Sue as well. And did he actually like the girl by daylight as much as he had worshipped the moon goddess by night?

Adelaide and Wendy moved on to the nex stanza, while recently informed Stella Rivera and Dustin Brooks were already approaching from afar.

**_"_**  
Beautiful dreamer  
Queen of my song,  
List while I woo thee  
With soft melody;

Gone are the cares of  
Life's busy throng,  
Beautiful dreamer  
Awake unto me!  
**_"_**

Dustin and Stella found their elder siblings in one another's arms, and they started giggling. "Cool"

Both Zoey and Crony wished that they had been able to snuck away, because getti ng caught by Dustin was as much of a horrifying embarrassment for Zoey as getting caught by Stella was for Marshal.

Stella and Dustin had been hitherto able to hide their relationship from their elder siblings, but now that they had caught them in flagrante delicto, there was little reason for them to hide it any longer, rather, it was the best occasion to come out without having to fear much of a repression. Thus without warning, Stella snuggled close to Dustin and pressed her lips tenderly against his nose.

Nevertheless, Zoey and Crony jumped up, looking consternated. "Dustin? Stella? What the?" But then they calmed down, given that they were not really in a situation that allowed them to judge.

Adelaide and Wendy went away, smiling like an eternal sun. They were now no longer concerned with the Riveras and the Brooks, as they thought that those families would be able to handle it on their own. Wendy had now found the right inspiration in order to sort it out with Michael Barret, either.

Zoë Brooks and Marshal Rivera walked away, side by side, as the needed to talk about the situation, which was not easy after all.

* * *

**Chapter 27 Redstone Gulch**

* * *

**27:0:12 Freddie Comes To PCA**

So Prince Fredward Of Miranda had come to grow up as the son of Marissa Benson, and he had not yet come to know about his proper origins. His last school in Seattle had been aforementioned Rodgeway Middle School, and he had lived next door to Spencer Shay and his sister Carly.

He was perversely obsessed with that girl, and he stalked her constantly, making creepily horny allusions in her presence.[27:1] He was thus very much opposed to making the step from Seattle to California, away from the object of his his not-so-secret, but definitely most perverse, obsessions.

Ironically, **Jerry Shay**,[27:2] the grandfather of Carlotta Shay, was also an alumnus of Pacific Coast Academy. Even more: We had been studying together in several classes. Carly was certainly qualified for being a honour student at this elitarian prep school, and one would think that good old Elroy would have sent his grandaughter the same way upon the start of coeducation.

But nothing like that had happened, and there had not been any plans for doing so until Carly heard about Freddie's impending departure. The reason is that Elroy Shay was the first student to have rejected being voted into the secret society of the Silver Hammers, because he had sensed their moral corruption and lack of integrity.

But things were now about to change. Carlotta had already been corrupted enough by Fredward benson to want to follow him to the new place, and she would do so at the beginning of the following academic year.

* * *

**27:0:13 Reviving The Web Show**

As we all remember, Chase and Michael had founded their web show in order to boost their career as cartoon makers. After their initial failure, Wayne Gilbert had forced them to switch to graphic novels featuring super heroes. This had not been Chase's cup of tea, but with the help of painter girl Maria Misa, the new project had taken off, making the web show a launch pad for new heroes like Superchase and Michaelman.

Things had changed at the beginning of the academic year, because the acceptance of their cartoons by _Toon Juice_ had implied that the original mission of the web show was fulfilled. In other word, there was no longer any need for it.

Well, Samantha Puckett would have really liked to continue the show with Chase and Michael, concentrating on more skits instead of the cartoons. But Wayne Gilbert had only participated as a technical producer because of the graphic novels. In other words: The show would have been forced to do without a technical producer, and it would have gone down the drain once again.

The arrival of Fredward Benson, however, changed the situation. The horny creep from Seattle was a versed master of the art of handling a web cam, and the whole canvas of Pear software and hardware. He was already looking forward to working in the Pear Store around the corner, as he was totally addicted to this and unable to see what a bunch of abusers the Pear company was indeed, or maybe he was even proudly supporting their immoral business practice? It was really a bit of both of these.

Alas, there was a problem: Fredward and Samantha did not appear to get along very well. They had always fought each other over

Fortunately, Addie Singer and Wendy Gellar were able to talk Fred and Sam into a compromise, enabling the continuation of _The Chase And Michael Show_.

* * *

**27:1 Kisses And Apples**

* * *

**27:1:1 Statistics For Dummies**

As an aspiring actress for fluffy comedies, Lola Martinez was particularly interested in various sorts of kissing. She had studied already lots of old movies, even from the good old times of two-dimenasional television, low definition screens, or black and white movies.

In addition, she had often watched Quinn Pensky studying statistics. Lola did not understand zilch about numbers, but she knew very well that one of Quinn's most-used words was _correlation_.

I had not learned much about this subject, except that one and only reliable golden rule to live by:

**_"_**  
Never ever trust any kind of statistics unless you have manipulated them with your own hands!  
**_"_**

But let us hear what some competent expert, such as Evelyn Kwong, had to say about this tricky subject:

**_"_**  
Correlation measures the deviation of observed random variables from what you would expect if those variables were completely independent.  
**_"_**

OK, for some people, these are just numbers, and they don't try to read any sense into them. But even the most shallow teenagers wondered from time to time whether the coincidence of daily events was random or not.

* * *

**27:1:2 Lola's Theorem**

Lola did not really understand Quinn's or Evelyn's nerd talk, and she felt even forced to puke whenever hearing those wallflowers talk about it.

But then she had seen a painting by Maria Misa, depicting her favourite scene from the first book of the bible, _Genesis_: Adam's and Eve's temptation. This topic had been depicted in a huge variety of art works, especially those deployed in monastries, churches, and similar buildings.

Lola was totally fascinated by Maria's version, though. She imagined that Adam and Eve were about to make out, right after taking the fatal bite from the forbidden fruit. The Latino diva concluded that there was something like a correlation, in the sense Quinn seemed to have used the word, between a man's way of biting from an apple, and his quality as a kisser.

Lola had also heard Quinn using frequently the expression _theorem_ in order to denote scientific statements that were subjects of her research. And now she took the plunge and claimed aforementioned correlation of apple-eating and kissing as her own theorem. She was not able to pronounce that Greek word, and she even corrupted it into _theodolite_, _deodorant_, _theomancy_, or other words that sounded fairly similar, but which barely made any sense in that context.

Of course, a true nerd like Quinn Pensky could not allow for Lola to use scientific terms in such a loose manner. If the brainless diva wanted to boast with having made a scientific theory, she needed to work on its verification as well, and this was not an easy thing.

For Lola Martinez's taste, the world's best kisser among the boys was of course Drake Parker, with whome she would have been able to make out for some thousand hours straight — or so she claimed. Now she needed a way to study his ways of taking a bite from an apple, and a possibility to compare him to other boys.

First, she needed a video about Drake biting some apple, and that was not hard, because Megan Parker had uploaded one of those to the interweb. Too bad for Drake, the apple was made of wax, and the whole video clip had been a prank scene, filmed with a hiden camera. But Lola was still convinced that it reveiled the major characteristics of Drake's bites, and she had to swoon all the time when she watched the video over and over again.

But Quinn Pensky insisted in the necessity of also checking not so attractive boys. There was some simple statistical reason for this, something she referred to as the **Bayesian Inversion Formula**. For Lola, this made not much sense, but she knew that there was no reasonable way for her to argue with the nerd from Washington.

Quinn suggested Lola to study Mark's kissing skills and his ways of eating an apple. Before her separation from Mark, she would have killed anyone to even dare to think about suggestiong such a blasphemic action.

Lola looked consternated. "You must hate me if you tell me to do so!" She was close to throwing up. "And you already know that Mark is a bad kisser."

Quin shook her had. "We had never made it that far." She had been worried about that, but now she was happy that she had not wasted her lips on a guy like Mark Del Figgalo. "OK, choose someone else, but you know that we need to study a broad variety of boys in order to come to a trustworthy result."

Lola sighed deeply. "Also, Maria won't like it. I have hired her in order to paint a picture of me and Drake … kissing the French way!" She chuckled. "We are Adam and Eve in the paradise, and you are the hissing snake."

* * *

**27:1:3 Banapples Revisited**

The whole talk about biting an apple had persuaded Quinn Pensky into taking yet another look at one of her old botanic projects: The banapples!

After all, bananas and apples wewre not really closely realated — quite the contrary! Apples are pomes, while bananas are some weird kid of berries.

Now Quinn was revisiting the spot in the school garden where she had once planted the banapple shrub. She sobbed bitterly, because everything had rotten. The shrub was now standing in the shadow of the large an dold tree that she had recently been able to uproot and replant in order to save the roof top of Brenner Hall.

That place was nowadays nice and sunny: No longer saddening shades in the afternoon and annoying excrements of killer squirrels! The girls did no longer need to redirect the packs of scary rodents to the boys' roof in order to enjoy the fresh spring air. Likewise, it was no longer necessary to use a carefully and delicately balanced arrangement of mirrors, lenses, and fiber cabels in order to redirect the sunlight to the top of Brenner Hall.

Most of the work required for the operation had been possible only due to the great expertise and unspeakable patience of aforementiond Eric Blonowwitz from San Diego. Alas, the works were not quite completed: a few days later, Eric would show up again in order to control the outcome of the previous efforts.

Quinn deemed this as an excellent occasion for a conversation with the ultranerd from San Diego. The main reason was her observations about a potential doping scandal. She did not want to tell anything to her fellow stingray scientists, for she did not want to drag them into the same kind of trouble and confusion she saw herself stuck in.

* * *

**27:2 Mean Teacher Hodges**

* * *

**27:2:1 Economy Classes**

Zoë Brooks, Logan Reese, Michael Barret, Chase Matthews, Nicole Bristow, Dana Cruz, and Stacey Dillsen were all students in the class of **Mr. Hodges**[27:3] about national economy.

This was not just one arbitrary teacher, but the oldest still active teacher at Pacific Coast Academy. More precisely, Hodges had already been arund during my life time, and he had been really mean. Of course, he had been a fairly young teacher during the fifties, but this did not make it any better. According to legend, he was responsible for my untimely end, but this legend will be reread a bit further down the road.

Needless to say, none of the kids was happy for being in this classes.

For Zoey Brooks, this class was more than just important, As she was still pondering about her chances of making it later on to Harvard Business School, she needed to be particularly good in those economy classes. The situation was thuis a bit different from her aforementioned chemistry classes where a straight B had been enough. But was this feasible when the teacher was such a mean scum?

A typical example for their classes was the following:

Stacey Dillsen had to answer a question about **Adam Smith**, the conceptual foundation father of modern theories of national economy. She got it basically right, but flunked some details. Well, at least she needed several tries to correct them. But them Hodges had got nothing better to do than complain about her tasteless pullover. The latter had been knitted by Joshua Nichols, her new boyfriend, and it was really cool, but in any case, it was not a teacher's job to critisise the students for their personal taste. Little wonder, poor Stacey started sobbing in agony.

Scot Adam Smith was one of the main topics of Hodges's classes.

Before starting as a teacher at Pacific Coast Academy, the creep had graduated from Harvard Business School, with a thesis about this anantgardist of modern business management, already spent a few years at **Adam Smith Business School** in Glasgow .

In Smith's _The Wealth of Nations, Book IV, Part III_, the situation of English and Scottish schools are compared. Oxford and Cambridge, the most renowned and reverred English universities, had been able and forced to pay their teachers on a steady base, allowing them to make a decent living regardless of their efforts, their success, and the development and improvement of their pedagogical skills on a daily base. According to Smith, this was detrimental to English economy, along with the fact that the Church of England instead of free entrepreneurs had been the major employers of the skilled man of the letter.

The very foundation of Pacific Coast Academy, as opposed to its forerunner, had been momented steadily by Smith's criticism. The forerunner had been basically a seminary school, funded and controlled by a consortium of churches. There had been private sponsors from the very beginning, such as multiply mentioned Schneider's bakery, but those had all been pious enterpreneurs whose donations got funnelled by the consortium into the boarding school. Only the constitution of Pacific Coast Academy deposed with that all powerful church-controlled consortium, and replaced it with a board of the sponsors who were thence exerting a lot more direct influence upon the policy of the prep school. The foundation fathers had been among those donators, but the times of the financial depression, the crash of the Wall Street preceding the darkest time of twentieth century, had slowly changed their scopes. In order to convince themselves of the correctness of their envisioned approach, they looked for anchors in the history of philosophy. and Adam Smith appeared to be that one ultimate straw to grasp. Of course, they had not really been looking beyond the clichés they had heard about the influence of Smith on the philosophy that had made the American economy bloom.

In order to be able to carry out their plans, the foundation fathers had hired no other than that one Mr. Hodges. He was still very young, but he had got recommendations issued by his teachers and masters marking him as an expert for the aforementioned worldview, and thus he was deemed the right person in order to implement Smith's vision at Pacific Coast Academy, in order to ensure that it would be the brooding place of a wealthy society ruled by — or so was the public supposed to see them — generous sponsors of the most elitarian educational institution. As a teacher, Hodgeson was more of a preacher of the new policies of the school's board.

I never said that Smith's system as such was a bad thing, as it had for sure had the potential of improving teachers and teaching at Pacific Coast Academy. Indeed, for most purposes it had momented some sort of a golden age on the campus, especially after the war of Vietnam. I did not wish to fall back into the church-driven character of the precursor of Pacific Coast Academy. But with a bunch of greedy and selfish sponsors in command, things had already been bound back to hell. And Adam Smith had seen things like that coming. Yet people like Hodges had found a way of abusing the renowned Scottish moral philosopher of the eighteenth century in order to justify what modern entrepreneurs wanted to do.

And there was no other reason why someone of almost eighty years was still in the service of Pacific Coast Academy, and especially of Leo Bradford, and there had been no plans for getting him to retire, inspite various objections forwarded by parents of students.

This way, I clashed with the system in vigour, in more than just a few ways. Hodges was the first of the teachers to notice my opposition to the more or less evident ploys of the school's board. That's why they had to get rid of me and make me disappear in the wastelands — for good. I was seized by the security gang, drugged, dragged into the canyon, and left their to rot in a dust cyclon. The latter covered my corpse, making it look like a tomb.

* * *

**27:2:2 The Legend**

So, what was the legend pupils of Pacific Coast Academy passed down from one generation of students to the next? It was even found in the yearbook of my last year as a mortal among the mortals.

**_"_**  
Mr. Hodges had been so rude to everyone, especially Charles R. Galloway.

After a few days, Charles fled from the classes, leaving the campus good. He was never seen again. His tomb is found in the wilderness of Redstone Gulch.

**_"_**

**Redstone Gulch** was a canyon near Malibu, just a few miles from the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

Of course, the legend should sound a bit weird: I had not been seen — according to these rumours — by anyone since my departure from the campus, yet everyone knew where I died and was buried.

So, had I been able to dig my own tomb and bury myself therein? And who had been the witnesses of my death and burial? Maybe those people who had never seen me again, dead or alive, after my departure?

OK, you know now that this legend only preserved two elements: The untimely end of my worldly life had to do with Mr. Hodges, and my decaying remains had been deported and enterred in the wastelands of Redstone Gulch.

Why had this legend been approved, yeah, even supported and distributed officially by the board? They simply needed to make everyone see my end as a result of individual troubles, denying that the whole system of sponsors was the yultimate culprit.

* * *

**27:2:3 A Rediscovery?**

Due to their troubles with Hodges's classes, Michael and Logan had started turning interested in the legend about my mysterious untimely end. Of course, none of those creeps were anywhere near interested in the history of theri school.

Michael Barret hoped that a proving the legend would finally make all students rebel against Hodges and get him expelled from Pacific Coast Academy. In addition, down to the failure of getting accepted into the fraternity of the silver hammers, he needed to find something else in order to impress Lisa Perkins, proving that he was not a worthless coward. And a trip to the gulch would have been a huge challenge. Completing it would have been something to boast with for the next few years, should it have taken that long for him to capture a girlfriend.

Logan Reese had got one and only one motivation for doing so: He wanted to make money by marketing the ledend, by the way of producing a movie that would have even made is father go pale for envy. In order to do so, he neeeded to find a proof of the legend, which — at least in his eyes — meant: Going to Redstone Gulch; Finding my tomb; Unearthing the tomb; Identify my belongings. Only this way he would be able to sell the legend credibly to the broad mass of mankind who was hungry for cheap sensations.

In order to obtain the required proof, he was up to organising a field trip to Redstone Gulch, and of course he needed some students to join him on the trip, in order to serve him as mindless slaves and henchmen.

Zoë Brooks was busy studying for the test, and she did not need any distraction. In addition, she had already partly understood that there was something thoroughly fishy, and that Hodges was basically the leading advocate of the current system ruling the policy of Pacific Coast Academy. If she had not made it at least that far by now, my appearance in her day dream would have been for naught. She did not know what exactly the makers of the legend tried to hide. In addition, she was not willing to disturb a tomb, on purpose.

Nicole Bristow had got her problems with Mr. Hodges as well, as she imagined that all kinds of business were basically like her father's company trading with juices and corn syrup. She had never understood Bristow Juices well, though, and so she made simplicist assumptions about it. But what did she think about the legend? Basically, she did not think so much, but she just wanted to get rid of Hodges, like many a student over here.

Dana Cruz wanted to show how fearless she was, and she hoped for stumbling into a dust cyclon while snooping Redstone Gulch. This would be a challenge for her, the toughest woman of California. She already anticipated Jeremiah Trottman spreading the news about the first guirl to beat her wat through a desert storm out in the canyon.

Lola Martinez and Quinn Pensky were not attending the classes of Mr. Hodges. Yet the news about the impending excursion had made them curious. Both of them had deliberately avoided those classes in order to escape from the necessity of having to face Hodges.

Lola was particularly attracted by the possibility of a movie made by Logan Reese about the mission, and she knew that she would play the female main rôle in the movie. That's why she wanted Chase to come along as well, for he was required as a screenwriter. Unfortunately, Lola did not know anything about the nature of such a female star. She seemed to have imagined a girlfriend of mine living at the same school. But — as should have been beknownst even unto Lola — the school had been only for boys, and there had not been any girls involved. Lola was still negotiating both with Dingo Channel and with Malcolm Reese, and thus she was looking for each occasion to make herself look more valuable to either producer. Even a jerk like Logan was welcome to help her here, as had already been the case when she was hired successfully for the rôle as a walking corpse for the Halloween horror drama performed in the haunted mansion in the year 2005. Her decision hether to sign a contract with Dingo was due by the end of the month, making it possible for starting preliminary shoorings for **Totally Terry** already during spring break.

Quinn Pensky, on the other hand, wanted to use the physically and mentally exhausting trip to the canyon in order to test some of her new inventions, along with improved versions of some of her older works. Especially the wonderful quinnocular sounded marvellous. It was able to make obstacles transparent upon whim, provided sufficeintly stromg illumniation. Another important improved and upgraded invention was a multipurpose detector, nowadays able to detect the excrements of small animals. She had started this research when she was busily hunting skunks and squirrels across the campus. The device's strength was still the recognition of metals, though.

But there was one more reason for her to visit the canyon: She wanted to try to recultivate aforementioned Guadalapecho cactus over there. She deemed the climate in the canyon optimal for that purpose, but she needed to study the soil for the purpose. In orederto actually establish a cactus plantation, she needed the help of Eric Blonowitz, whom she had already contacted because of the remains of the banapple shrub in the school park.

Wayne Gilbert compared the legend about me, videlicet Charles R. Galloway, as a parallel to that of lost and forgotten superheroes or villains from his cartoons by _DC_ and _Marvel_. He predicted that the whole mission would be a big failure. Of course his definition of failure was not the same as Logan's, as the latter did not believe in lost heroes, anyways. "The world only needs one here: Me!"

Chase Matthews was in a delicate sitiation, because he did not want to disappoint his best pal Michael. But he was scared by the possibility of disturbing the last rest of a corpse. In writing his aforementioned halloween story, he had tried to overcome his fears of doom and horror. But he knew that he had failed miserably, especially in the moment in which he had seen Lola drink her own blood, even if it was really just raspberry blix. His awe was rooted in his knowledge of the works of Edgar Allan Poe, and since he had got his girlfriend Addie, he had consolidated his convitcions even further: "The dead need to be left alone."

Poe's _The Fall Of The House Of Usher_ had scared him in particular, because he imagined that I had been buried alive out in the wilderness. Little did he and his pals know that my flesh had already been dead even before moving out into the wastelands.

Stacey Dillsen wanted to contribute at least a sextant made all of cotton swab and white glue, but stupid Lola Martinez rejected this because she thaught that sextants were erotic devices. But she was thoroughly afraid of the canyon, with or without a tomb. On the other hand, she knew that there was a hill top at the entrance of the canyon, a spot allowing her to watch the stars very carefully. She would even have spent the night out there in order to do so.

* * *

**27:2:4 The Guide**

None of the sophomores knew the way into the wastelands of Redstone Gulch, though. They would almost have trusted some windbag, a senior known as _Lafe Berkowitz_.[27:4]

Fortunately, there were more reliable alternatives: Joshua Nichols was — according to Megan Parker and Wendy Gellar — a very competent ranger and pathfinder,[27:5] making it impossible to get lost in the boring and open wastelands.

Lola moaned: "OK, but only if Drake comes with us, too!"

Wendy nodded solemnly.

Logan sighed deeply. "OK, Drake will be with us, but I get the credits for the sound track!"

Lola glared fatally at the biggest jerk of Beverly Hills — ever, getting him to withdraw his latter clause.

So, the kids seemed to look forward to a well-organised and successful trip. Would their dreams really come true?

* * *

**Chapter 28 Chaos At PCA**

* * *

**28:1 The Trip Into The Canyon**

* * *

**28:1:1 Last Instructions**

Of course it was not legal for kids to leave the campus all alone, just in order to visit a canyon. Even worse, the school's administration would not have wanted them to dig out anything showing the corpse of a former student that had disappeared under mysterious circumstances about half a century ago. Dean Rivers was not fully aware of my history, but he feared intuitively that the board would have rebuked him, let alone the alumni and the network of the parents.

Logan had thus decided to give a fake reason for his trip, and finally, the group had been granted a pass.

Joshua Nichols had gathered the patrticipants on the campus square in order to check their equipment. He had got emergency tents for all of them.

Drake was making out with Lola from the very start, and they missed thusly out on the security instructions given by Josh.

Logan was in a stinky mood, and he wanted the unruly dweeb to shut up, but Michael urged him to let Josh talk, because this trip would be dangerous, and he needed the safe guidance of the bigheaded dork.

Josh also checked water and food. He exhibited a bear-proof tin can. "There are bears in the canyons … sometimes … but this way, they won't touch our meals, because only humans can …" He tried to open the complicated tin vessel, but he failed like a true dork.

A barbed arrow flew swiftly above the head of Josh, maybe even scratching some of his hair. The projectile was also noticed by others, and it finally hit a target disk attached to some lone tree. The group of pioneers startled, wondering whether the red indians whad been once again on the attack.

But Samantha Puckett showed up, clad like Daniel Boone. She was wielding a longbow and wearing a quiver, filled with arrows of the same sort as the one mentioned above.

Michael started breathing again. "What are you doing?"

Sam alias Trisha grunted, "when we get stuck in the wasteless and run out of Robin's Wieners, I will hunt some possums and gophers. I've practised a lot with this thing." **Robin's Wieners**[28:1] was one of the most successful chain of butcheries along the Pacific coast, all the way down from Vancouver to San Diego. They were famous for their hot dogs, especially in the eyes of Samantha Puckett. They had already been a business partner of the cafeteria of Pacific Coast Academy, but now they were so even more, because Yumburger and Robin's were now collaborating and ready for sharing the pork market of the whole country among themselves.

Josh moaned, "obviously. Who does not dislike running out of pork chops?"

"I always wondered what a gopher steak tastes like," continued Sam. "And this way, I may protect Michael from bears, and Chase from coons. And we will make a top session of the web show!"

Eric Blonowitz was here in order to look up Redstone Gulch as a place for planting a garden for the rare cactus, and he was reading from a book. But now he was shocked. "I'm a vegetarian! I will not eat your gopher steaks."[28:2]

Sam shrugged. "Then eat cactus thorns!" She did not know about the project of Quinn Pensky concerning the recultivation of the guadalapecho cactus.

The geek princess from Seattle had to talk now about the possibilities of eating the thorns of a cactus.

Sam sighed. "OK, whatever! So am I in the team? Then we may make a clip of the discovery for the web show."

Chase and Michael nodded vigorously. "Sure!"

Logan agreed as well, for he did not want to starve out there.

Lola wondered, "cool, I love being seen in clips, but only those also watched by Dingo or Reese productions. But no camera?"

Samantha looked around. "Fredward!" She suspired. "The tech freak seems to shit into his diapers." She ran away in order to fetch the coward of the country.

Josh used the break in order to talk about ways to find your way through a canyon. "This is a topographic map of the area."

Lola grunted, "what is a pornographic map?"

Quinn had to correct her rigorously.

Dana Cruz was already totally impatient. "Come, let's go, we don't need any middle school wimp!"

Logan agreed wholeheartedly, but he was contradicted by Chase and Michael.

Finally, Samantha and Fredward showed up again. More precisely, the former grabbed the latter's panties and dragged him across the campus in this manner.

Freddie grunted, "my mom will be terribly upset if I sneak away …"

The high school girls were disgusted upon hearing about the devil incarnate, Marissa benson. They had already gone through endless suffering through the barbaric methods imposed upon the girls by that evil creep, especially weekly tick baths. Fredward had gone through those unspeakable tortures for over a decade already. Indeed, he was abused by Dr. Wheeler as a test object: The tick bath used by his mother was not yet available on the market.

As an example, Dr. Wheeler had implanted a microscopic receiver for aforementioned global positioning system in Fredward's skull bones[28:3] before he was carried away from his home, the court of Miranda. This way, Doc Wheeler would always be able to control his location, and so would be Marissa Benson — and even the Chancellor of Yerba!

On the upside, it would be possible for those adults to find Fredward, just in case that he should get lost in the open wastelands. But Fredward did not know about this implanted microtransponder, and thus it did not help feel him any safer.

Having checked everything, the group started staggering off into the wastelands: Joshua Nichols, Drake Parker, Michael Barret, Chase Matthews, Logan Reese, Quinn Pensky, Lola Martinez, Nicole Bristow, Dana Cruz, Fredward Benson, and Samantha Puckett.

* * *

**28:1:2 In The Desert You Can Remember Your Name**

Stacet Dillsen was still carrying her cotton swab sextant, and she had been following the foot steps of the bigger group into the dunes. Upon spotting them, she cried: "Hello! You can't explore the canyon without my sextant!"

Josh turned around. "Hey, that is not really a bad idea, You are?"

Stacey introduced herself in her usual manner, lisping every now and then.

Of course, the huger part of the adventurers were strictly opposed to letting Stacey join them, but Josh was of a different opinion, He had gone through insanely many humiliations due to his big head, just as Stacey had gone through due to her lispy voice. "You like astronomy?"

Stacey nodded. "My telescope is my best friend. It is in my backpack. But Quinn's quinnocular is said to be better."

Josh smiled. "Out in the desert, you need to use everything you can rely on in order to find your way. And the stars can be relied on." He felt wrapped by Stacey's brittle arms. "Erm, thanks!" He started blushing a shape of fiery crimson, and Stacey seemed to do the same.

The campus was still not far behind the dauntless adventurers when some other people showed up.

Drake and Josh lookewd consternated, and then they grunted unison: "Megan!"

The little sister grinned viciously. "Hi, boobs, you won't come without me, will you?" She glared viciosly at her useless kinsmen.

Drake and Josh looked at each other, and they were not willing to let the cunning little vixen join their efforts. "Mom would kill us for letting you join."

Megan sighed. "OK, I will return to the campus. But then Humps won't come with you, either!"

Drake and Josh shrugged. "Who is Humps, anyways?"

Suddenly, a camel showed up behind Michael, chewing his sombrero, which he had borrowed from some senior. Michael squealed consternated. "Hey! This is my nest hat! And it is not even mine to begin with!" growled he at the top of his lungs. But it was too late. "Camels are even worse than horses!" He took cover behind Chase. "You always wanted to have a camel, so take it! But don't let it get near me!"

Chase had to correct Michael. "I always wanted to have a zebra, not a camel!"

Megan explained: "I borrowed Humps from the farm of Faye Dunnaway. Camels are suited for travelling the dusty wastelands, better than horses without a name.[28:4] But you obviously don't want Humps with you, and so …"

Logan equated camels with oil barons and thus with lots of money. "Hey! You have to come with us! Quinn, you've got that ostrich. Marvin. Why did you not take him with us? Ostriches are able to find diamonds in the sand."

Quinn sighed. "That would have been a good idea. Marvin would love it out here. But the thing with the diamonds is just a common urban legend."

Logan looked grumpy and disappointed. "Damn' … and I had already almost thought that nerds and spazzes were at least somethines good for something!"

Eric looked aghast. "OK, Quinn, is it true that your detector may find lizard pee?" He told Quinn about the reptiles he had raised earlier on. "One of them died of _diabetes mellitus_." He sobbed bitterly and started weeping.

Quinn tried hard to comfort him. "See, when my first reptile died …" They seemed to have a lot to talk about.

Lola shuddered a bit. "What if I am allergic to camel hair? Or ostrich feathers, for that matter? And certainly to lizard pee …"

Quinn shook her head. "I have tested you against allergies, and there is …"

Lola growled, "Quinn? When did you test me? I don't remember giving you my permission, right?"

Quinn went pale. "Er …" She prepared for having to run away. "Does it really matter? It was for the better of you … honestly!"

Dana wondered, "how many camels would you pay for me?"

Logan scratched his chin. "Ten? One hundred? One thousand?" He looked really nervous, for he knew that Dana did not want to sound cheap.

Dana sighed for relief. "Sounds OK"

Megan unwrapped her oboe and blew a few notes, charming the camel. This implied that the caravan was finally ready for exploring the wastelands. And Megan had even got something more to say: "I have talked to the nephiew of your corpse,[28:5] who happens to be the boss of my evil and worthless step father Walter Nichols!"

Drake and Josh shivered, as they had once been forced to take care of Mr. Galloway's baby, and they had failed as miserably as can be. They knew that they were going to be in serious troubl by messing up this trip as well.

Some of the kids wanted to unload their luggage onto Humps's strong back. Megan needed to intervene.

Nicole wondered what was hidden in the two humps of the camel. "I guess something cute …I want a camel, too … but at hime in Kansas."

Quinn explained that camel humps contained essentially just fat. These news were shocking for the bimbo from Kansas, making her squeal like a wounded fury.

Down to the sextant and the quinnoculars — which allowed to see the stars at plain daylight and inspite of clouds — the gang progressed pretty fast, and the canyon was easy and straightforward to reach.

* * *

**28:1:3 Unearthed**

* * *

**28:1:3:1 The Right Spot**

Finally, the correct spot in the canyon had been found, and it was time for Logan to start digging. Of course, the spoiled jerk did not want to stain his supermodel hands with dirt, and so he left the unpleasant work to Chase and Michael.

At the same time, Eric Blonowitz started testing the soil. He figured that the conditions were not too bad for cultivating cactus plants, although he also found a few limitations.

Quinn Pensky checked his results, and she could not help agreeing with her nerd colleague.

Michael screamed in agony when he found that the spot in the soil he and Chase were digging contained actually something. Well, my mortal flesh had been fallen to dust or devoured by vermin long since. But my other worldly belongings were still present.

What did I feel when I noticed them scramble my unblessed tomb? Well, I did not hate them for it, at least not all of them. Logan Reese, the head of the gang, was of a different kind, though, because his mentality was by absolutely no means different from that of the typical greedy sponsors of Pacific Coast Academy, especially of the chief exeutive officers of Blix or Pear.

* * *

**28:1:3:2 Start Of The Web Session**

Fredward Benson was ready to start the broadcast of the special session of the _Chase And Michael Show_. Unfortunately, there was one big problem: Normal mobile telephones did not really work out there in the wastelands, only those with sky connection. For that reason, the kids had been provided with walk-and-talk devices in order to communicate with one another if they were separated for a little bit. But these oldfashioned machines were not suited for establishing any kind of connection to the interweb. On the other hand, Quinn Pensky had got some kind of a workaround. By connecting several electronic devices, she was able to extend the reach of the mobile telecommunication devices significantly. This would have been enough in order to allow Fredward to connect his Pearbook to the interweb and to run the web show.[28:6] On the other hand, this would of course take away a lot of electricity from the other devices, power which they would have possibly need later on, in the case of an emergency. Fortunately, Quinn's invention of the supreme power supply for Pacific Coast Academy, with the help of Melinda Crenshaw, Wayne Gilbert, and the other freaks, was advanced enough to allow her to build a portable emergency powerplant, just in case. And she had got the smallest version of the same in her backpack, powerful enough to run a few hundred webcasts by means of sky connection. Fredward counted down: "Five … four … three … two …"

Everyone was waiting for the one, but it never came, because the horny dweeb deemed it uncool. Finally, the connection was up and standing. Kids in the lounges of Brenner Hall were about to watch carefully.

Zoë Brooks was among those, side by side with Marshal Rivera. Since the weird night where they had shared a moon bar and come to sleep on the pavement, they had not yet talked about much. Dustin and Stella kept on tricking them incessantly into doing something, supported by cunning vixen Megan Parker. Adelaie Singer and Wendy Gellar were equally eager on watching what was going on out in the wastelands, and they had accused Logan, of course — or so our experience tells us — not without good reason, of abusing their boyfriends.

Addie Singer was increasingly worried, because everything reminded her of all the uncanny stories she had read from her idol Edgar Allan Poe. She knew very well that the official legend about my end was fishy, but she wondered which of the many versions of weird kinds of death she had read in the gothic fables were appropriate in my case.

* * *

**28:1:3:3 My Amulet**

Rummaging through my remaining bolongings, an old amulet of mine came to appear. Quinn Pensky was able to identify it by the way of applying her set of quinnoculars, reveiling some sort of an inscription of my name.

Chase Matthews was alerted immediately, as was Adelaide Singer. There was one thing that sprang to their mind like a kangaroo: _The Mask Of The Red Death_ by Edgar Allan Poe. And they concluded that taking anything from the belongings of the corpse would inevitably trigger the ultimate curse. The last line of the wonderful story was burned into their mind and their soul:

**_"_**  
And Darkness and Decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all.  
**_"_**

Unfortunately, exorbitantly insensitive materialists like Fredward Benson and Samantha Pucket refused to believe in curses, maledictions, and bad omens.[28:7]

For that very reason, Chase's fears and objections were thoroughly overheard. Michael was not feeling well, either.

Wendy and Adelaide knew that their respective loverboys should never have agreed in the first place with joining such a dangerously audacious adventure initiated by disgusting jerk Logan Reese. But now it was too late, and their bitter moans were of no avail.

Logan Reese knew that he would not believed unless he was able to present a proof of the legend to the inquisitive minds awaiting them downtown. And the belongings from the tomb were very useful for that purpose. The locket found in my grave was certainly the most intriguing proof he would be able to rub into the face of inquisitive star reporters like **Miles Bambridge**.[28:8] Not only Chase and Michael were little willing to let Logan grab stuff from the tomb and take it downtown. A few others objected as well, but none of their mental reservations were a reason for Logan to retract from his plans.

Making it worse, Samantha Puckett took the locket and exhibited it to Fredward's camera. The whole world was now able to see whathad been hidden for half a century. But what did my pendant even stand for? Apparently, it had not helped me to get out of the desolate wastelands of Redstone Gulch. Samantha made even fun of the dead and of amulets when moderating the show. Lola insisted in being allowed to wear the amulet and show herself this way to the public.

And now Fredward Benson upgraded his vanity to yet another level when he started to place himself in front of his own camera. "Carly … Carly Shay … do you see me?" The horny flavour of his immoral gaze increased more and more in intensituy. Fredward boasted wioth having conquered the wastelands just in order to please Carly, and now she would not have another choice than to marry and have a few dozens of kids with him.

Samantha poked Fredward. "Carly will never do love you, dorkward! Rather, the ghost of Charles Galloway is coming to eat you alive." Of course she did not believe in ghosts, and she just tried to scare her belovehated fellow student. And the way she did this underlined once more her inner mental corruption.

Even Logan and Dana knew that the horny pervert was going out of his way, and they commanded him sternly to return to his proper position behind the interweb camera.

Unlike her two best friends, Carly Shay was not quite irreverend of te death and the unworldly. She was watching the broadcast, and she was thoroughly intimidated by the prospects of my ghost haunting not only the dried sands of the valley of Redstone Gulch, but also the whole realms of Pacific Coast Academy, the school of her friends and future school of herself. But Carlotta was naïve enough to believe that the rites and the moral codes of the organised religions of her society would offer protection from the woes and curses. Alas, the latter had long since become but additional instruments of control in the hands of the rulers and oppressors of the people. She relied on singing pious songs like _Amazing Grace_,[28:9] but she did not really understand what she was doing.

* * *

**28:1:3:4 Time To Return**

Logan snuck the amulet secretly into a bag resting on the back of Humps.

Sam was already about to declare the whole web cast finished, but they were interrupted by Eric Blonowitz who wanted to say something about lizards and the fertile soil out here in the canyon. "it is perfect for many forms of wildlife and of plantations … barring the lacking erain. Quinn and I have already started thinking about artificial irrigation …"

The bad girl from downtown Seattle pulled Eric's panties loose. "Shut up, you dweeb!" Then she shoved him rudely away and made some more perverted remarks before closing the webcast. "I will fetch us some dinner!" She grabbed an arrow from her quiver, ready to fire it at some unfortunate bypassing bear or racoon.

Quinn took care of her new boyfriend. "Aw, my lizard boy, I think you need some medical support."

Josh and Stacey had started planning the long way home. Finally, everyone was ready for that step.

The kids at Pacific Coast Academy had been totally excited, but also shocked by Logan's ruthlessness. However, Wayne Gilbert had noticed the amulet that was about to be smuggled. He explained that t6his would trigger the wild hunt. "The adventurers are lost!" Unfortunately, although most of the naïve onlookers did not approve of Logan's action, they deemed Wayne a spaz, and they would never have shared his opinios about the coming of doom. Only Evelyn stood unconditionally by his side, while a few others, such as Zoë Brooks, were too troubled without the resounding announce of gloom and doom picked from some graphic novel.

* * *

**28:1:3:5 The Green Tornado**

Following the instructions elborated carefully by Josh and Stacey, the caravay was now making its way back to the campus. But all of a sudden, the skies and the horizeon went dark.

Eric ad Quinn were hastingly looking for natural explanations, but they did not find any. The dust was whirled aloft, and it formed something resembling a green cyclon. This was really unheard of. The nerds thought about a swarm of insects emitting some green light, but this did not seem to be a really helpful explanation.

Intimidated Stacey asked Quinn for herset of quinnoculars. She thought that it was still possible to use it iin order to look at the starred welkin for orientation. Quinn did not refuse to fulfill Stacey's request, although she was not sure whether her invention was that powerful. Stacey donned the device and span around. But before adjusting the oculars and the lenses appropriately for watching past the sepia clouds, her gaze hit Humps, and even more, it reveiled the amulet stuck in one of the bags carried by the camel.

Fredward and Samantha remained obstinate and refused to believe in some sign of divine doom. "It is all natural!"

Megan did not think so. She knew very well that Logan's greed and obstinacy were the reasons for the tornado. Chase, Michael, and a few others had understood that it had not been right to take from my possessions and to take them downtown. But Megan was the only one not starting to panic. She picked her oboe and started playing some soothing tune. The power of her misuic was actually strong enough to calm me down, but only for the time being.

Chase and Michael forced Logan to return the locket to the tomb. But this did not mean that the curse was now lifted: Logan was still an obstinte capitalist and imperialist, and as long as people like him ruled over Pacific Coast Academy, things like this would occur regularly.

Finally, Chase and Michael returned the amulet, and with Stacey's ad Josh's navigational skills, supported by Humps's instincts, the caravan would return safely to the campus. Well, talking about _safety_ was probably not quite accurate, as the chaos was not really over.

* * *

**28:2 Stingray Wrestlers**

* * *

**28:2:1 The Team**

The wrestling team of Pacific Coast Academy was yet another hangout of the worst of the worst jocks. Summing it up, they were even a whole lot worse than football players: The latter needed to take care of complex strategical resolutions, and act according to the team spirit. In a wrestling match, however, each athlet was primarily doomed to fight on his own.

Like each athletic team, the wrestling club of the stingrays had got a coach, and in this case, it was **Coach Peters**,[28:10] an more disgusting and less intelligent example of a human being than even Coach Keller or Coach Bubba. For Logan Reese or Dana Cruz, he was probably an example to live up to.

Both Logan and Dana were members of the team, side by side with bullies like **Duke Blatzberg**,[28:11] an even dumber jock. Dana was not really going to wrestle, though, as she was too busy and needed to cut down on her extracurricular activities. Another creep was Michael Zordo,[28:12] who seemed to adore blood even more than his pal Logan Reese.

The strangest of all wrestlers was one **Skippy Hickenlooper**,**cameo in ****_Bigtime Rush_****: ****_Big Time Concert_**** and identified with the same actor's anonymous cameos in ****_Zoey 101_****: ****_Wrestling_****, ****_Zoey 101_****: ****_Favor Chain_**** and ****_Zoey 101_****: ****_Hands On A Blix Van_** who did not look like a jock at all, and indeed, he was also on and off a member of the stingray scientists' club. How was it possible for a nerd to be chosen for the wrestling team?

* * *

**28:2:2 Regionals**

The stingray wrestlers engaged of course also in competitions with wrestlers from other Californian high schools, and the hall of fame in the administrational building exposed quite a few trophies that had already been won by stingray wrestlers upon one of the competitions.

The next regionals for the wrestlers were around the corner. And this time, Pacific Coast Academy was honoured with the duty of organising this exciting event. Well, it is exciting for him who who loves sweat, muscles, blood, and other disgusting substances.

Of course this competition had not found its way to our campus by the way of a random choice. The school's board had applied for it, and it was backed by interested sponsors. Just as usual, the latter would not want toorganise and promote such an event, unless it promised to be very profitable.

Revenues were expected in particular from the broadcast of the event via a large variety of interested mass media. Our school's television network, under the direction of Jeremiah Trottman, was responsible for the production of the pictures. But even Malcolm Reese had promised to support the local production team with additional material and experts. Other broadcasting corporations would gladly buy our pictures and comments in order to air them, either live or just in the form of selected highlights. In order to persuade possible advertisers into investing, it was necessary to offer an event moving the masses, just like a professional wrestling event.

Alas, the wrestling teams of high school students were not clubs for professional wrestlers. Rather. high school wrestling was supposed to follow a variety of strict rules imposed upon it by the state's committee for competitive sports at high schools. And these official rules did not promote a variety of things that were indispensible for the professionals as a whole.

* * *

**28:3 Fantasy Wrestling Game**

* * *

**28:3:1 The Concept Of Fantasy Sports Games**

termFantasy sports gamess have become very widespread and popular during the last decade:

Participants of this sort of game compose a virtual team of real athletes, using some equally virtual currency. When the selected athletes compete in real showdowns, their statistics influence the score of the participants that have chosen them. In many cases, it is possible to change the virtual team during a longer series of competitions, if you think your current roster is no longer good enough, but this comes usually with a cost of some sort. This was somewhat similar to a stock market, but often more emotional, as the participants were often addicted to their star athletes.

Many fantasy sports games were organised by amateurs, and all there was to win was a banner for your web page and _Splash Face_ account. There were some sponsored games, too. Most of those games, especially the more popular ones, running on big interweb sites, were centred around competitions of professional athletes, such as the national leagues for football, basketball, ice hockey, or baseball. But finally, high school sports were targetted as well, albeit only by regional geeks. One of the pioneers of this extension was aforementioned _Nevelocity_, who covered several disciplines in the state of Washington.

Wayne Gilbert was the first to express the wish for implementing a similar contest targetting Californian high school sports. He had started dreaming of this already upon receding from his position as a technical director of the _Chase And Michael Show_. At the same time, the football team of the stingrays had showed some huge improvements. But Wayne had wondered how strong a team would have been if he had been able to throw a few superheroes into the mix, which he could recruit from various books of the _DC_ and _Marvel_ series.

Thereupon, his pals Neil Wosniacki and Andrew Bernstein had come up with a mix of role-playing game and fantasy football, but had not been very consistent. Finally, they had stumbled upon Nevelocity's fantasy sports section, and they had started to give it a try.

Although those freaks did not understand zilch about high school sports in the state of Washington, they had been fairly successful for a beginner. This progress was possible because they followed simple laws: Buy promising yet underrated athletes as long as they are available for cheap, and get rid of overrated idols of the masses. Their ignorance of the scene was thus ieven a boon, because it made them a lot more objective, dependent not on popularity, but only on the facts and figures.

Not much later, the hype concerning the stingray football team had reached its climax: The state play-offs had been reached, and the students kept on dreaming of the first conquest of a big trophy in the history of the school. Little wonder, some of the students had started risking bets on the success of the team during the decisive matches around the corner. And the coming of the regionals of high school wrestling was of course yet another event that made the nerds consider establishing their own site for high school sports fantasy game.

There is now a big similarity between sport bets and fantasy sports games like those described above. This way, Wayne Gilbert and Andrew Bernstein had started thinking about a Californian high school fantasy league. The task appeared tedious, and so the freaks needed some support from elsewhere. And who was more competent — or so wondered Wayne — than the guy behind _Nevelocity_?

Of course there was one problem: Wayne did not know anything about the staff of that interesting site. But his help was needed immediately.

* * *

**28:3:2 Nevel Amadeus Papperman**

**Nevel Papperman** was a boy of eleven years from the ooutskirts and suburbs of the emerald city alias Seattle. Due to his skills as a painist and composer, he was about to earn himself the middle name: Amadeus.

What was more important fopr the students at Pacific Coast Academy: Nevel was the one person behind _Nevelocity_. Many vulgar people would have had a hard time believimng that the web site was run by some tween boy, and not by an adult man. But this did not matter to those with a bright mind.

So how did Wayne and his henchmen find out about him? They had already tried hard to do some research, but that mission had not got very far. Fortunately, they had been caught by Mindy Crenshaw when trying to find the reasons of Nevelocity. The young genius woman from San Diego knew Nevel Amadeus Papperman somewhat, as they were remote relatives. Alas, there had been certain conflicts between Mindy and Nevel, basically because Mindy feared that her relative was going to turn out as the bigger genius in her family. But now she was no longer willing to watch the dilettantic attempts of the cartoon freaks, and sh helped them to contact the little bugger.

Wayne was a bit shocked when he heard about all that, but he did not mind the fact as such. And now he just needed to get Nevel to visit the campus of Pacific Coast Academy in order to help the freaks establishing their project.

* * *

**28:3:3 The Introduction Of Nevel**

As aforementioned, there were still troubles betwen Mindy and her second cousin from Seattle, but she also demonstrated that she was proud of him, whereas she mentioned most boys in her extended family as lame dummies.

Nevel did not waste any time explaining his suggestions for Wayne's projects. Unfortunately, he had to admit that he was not sure whether his plans had been optimal. He was stuck with whatever the physical host of _Nevelocity_ had to offer unto those who rented their machines and connectivity and Nevel was well aware that those professionals were fairly incompetent. He had indeed hoped to find allies here in California in order to show that it was possible to design a site and to organise the interweb traffic a lot better.

So, how was the fantasy wrestling game going to look like? Nevel explained:

**_"_**  
There are several weight catetgories for wrestling.

The participamnts of the game may pick one wrestler from each category. The stats of the chosen wrestlers during the tournament will influence the score of the participant.

It is possible to ditch a wrestler during the tournament and to replace him with another one, but purchasing an athlete after others have already been eliminated means to hatve to buy him for an increased price.

**_"_**

Wayne Gilbert cackled mercilessly, just as he used to do. "That sounds like a funny fantasy sports game!"

Nevel nodded solemnly. "Let the games begin! May the best fantasy freak win!"

But what starts within fantasy does not always stay within fantasy.

* * *

**Chapter 29 The Pain Goes On**

* * *

**29:1 Zoey As A Wrestling Amazon**

* * *

**29:1:1 Separating Unruly Kids**

Zoë Brooks was once more strolling the campus, when she spotted, a few yards afar, two middle school guys stucvk in an argument they tried to settle by the way of freestyle wrestling. She panted heavily and, well aware of having messed too often already with the affairs of younger kids than she should have, wondered whther it was right to intervene. Finally, she decided to step in and to separate the combattants, using not only her dexterity and astrength, but also her whole charism that had always distinguished her thoroughly as a Mary Sue. Little did she know that she was observed by no other than aforementioned Coach Peters, and that everything had been but a trap.

The filthy adviser of the wrestling squad of the stingrays stepped up to Zoey, and he told her to join the team, due to the abilities she had just demonstrated. But he was not really up to letting her fight. What was the real reason for him to let her join the team?

Most male wrestling jocks were utterly perverse jerks, such as Logan Reese, the very embodiment of the concept of a _jerk_. Consequently, they refused to wrestle with girls. They either feared being deemed weak, for losing against them, or heartless, for hurting them in a combat. This was, of course, an utterly sexist and hypocritic attitude detested by all decent people and only maintained by the worst of the worst.

Sio, in putting Zoë Brooks into the team, Coach Peters just wanted the male adversaries to give up.

Exceptions were a few, and there was one powerful wrestler in Zoey's category, videlicet the lught weight athletes, who was not a jerk: **Chuck Javers**.[29:1] This was one reckless wrestling tank with no feelings at all.

The strategy of Peters was that of letting Zoë fight all the jerks, which was tantamount to saying that she would not have to fight them in the first place, as they would surely withdraw. But coming the bloody duel with Chuck Javers, Peters would withdraw Zoey from the contest, which was possible in the case of an injured wrestler. Instead,**Scott Ridgemond**,[29:2] a male stingray wrestler of her category, would have replaced her. According to Peters, a fresh Scott would have had a chance to defeat Chuck Javers, whereas one that had already gone through several fights would not have been able to do so.

Zoey was reluctant, but she did not want to let her school's team down. Inspite of her imprending departure from California in order to travel across the ocean to the realms of the Grande Nation, she was still a proud stingray, and she did want to make her fellow students proud of its teams, although she knew that they were just a tool of a system. She knew that if she had reclined, someone else would have accepted the challenge, and thereupon broken his bones, torn his muscles, mashed his brain, and bruised his guts in her place, for the glory of Pacific Coast Academy. Little did she know about the coach's perverse plans, and if she had known, she would not have consented, either.

Now you will ask why such an excessively dumb jock like Coach Peters was able to come up with such a decadent and dishonest strategy. Well, truth said: He did not, and he was nothing but a string puppet controlled by the board of sponsors. And clearly, those archons were selfish from head to toe.

* * *

**29:1:2 Zoey's Training**

The blond Mary Sue was submitted to training units in order to prepare for the impending regionals.

But instead of training by doing, videlicet wrestling, she was commanded to do repeated rope jumps in order to improve her phisical constitution. This was of course one totally absurd argument, as Zoë Brooks, as one of the most vigorous columns of the stingray baketball team, was certainly in a top condition. But Peters wanted to keep her away from what else was going on behind the scenes. Peters claimed that the boys did not need any more ropejumping, because they had already been in top condition. This was of course not true, as best seen in the case of Duke Blatzberg, who looked as exhausted as can be. But Zoey was told to ignoree him.

Really, Blatzberg was chock full with illegal potions deployed in order to improve his dexterity, but they had only worked temporarily. Alas, on the long run, he would suffer from terrible failures of the peripherical nervous system. Even now, there were frequent collapses of his circulation. The answer of Doc Wheeler were more injections with even more illegal and dangerous substances. The situation was now worse than ever before, as Marissa Benson assisted her former boss behind the scenes.

It was obvious for anyone that Zoey Brooks would recognise, at least upon contacting her uncle Glazer, that the medical treatment by Wheeler incolved illegal methods, and she would have denounced the whole squad. The mary0sueish amazon was not really expected to fight, so there was no need to get her involved in the fiorst case. Too bad, Zoey was now self-conscious enough to recognise that there were interests of the system exertingb their weighty impact behind the scenes.

But now Logan Reese insulted the blond Mary Sue by claiming — in his perverse manner — that she had already ruined the basketball team during the last year. This was of course an even bigger lie, as Zoey Brooks had definitely, since her acceptance, been the most reliable of all members of the basketball team, and they would not have made it anywhere without her insane efforts of talking some team spirit into the other players.

Zoey was still not aware of what was going on behind the scenes, but she had turned increasingly vigilant, so there was still a spark of hope left.

* * *

**29:2 The Broadcast Of The Event**

* * *

**29:2:1 The Colour Commentator**

As aforementioned, Jeremiah Trottman was the leading moderator of the campus TV channel, and he was under pressure as well. A well-functioning broadcast was essential for the broadcast of the whole venture of hosting some important athletic on the campus of Pacific Coast Academy.

During the olympic games of 1984, several athletes were hosted on this campus, and they were allowed to use the gyms and the sport fioelds for the purpose of training. Thye had also been visited by a bunch of journalists, adding a little bit to the publicity of the school. And although the olympic ganmes were of course ranking considerably higher than some high school regionals, our high school events were still vital for the sponsors.

His colour commentator was **Dooley Abrams**,[29:3] a freak who knew all results of the past ten years. Wayne Gilbert was therefore trying to get him to help with the fantasty wrestling project.

Lola had originally planned to apply for the job as a colour commentator. She would almost have gone far enough to make out with disgusting dweeb Jeremiah Trottman for that purpose. The problem was of course that she did not really care about sports, especially not about wrestling. She had still not told any of her pals that her little sister Shelby was a successful martial artist. Likewise, their father **Juan Martinez**[29:4] was also Shelby's coach. But fortunately, Lola was no longer in need of every bit publicity: She had finally signed a contract with **Dingo Channel** for a character among main cast of _Totally Terry_.

* * *

**29:2:2 The Man Behind The Camera**

Fredward Benson had volunteered for the canera team, due to his great experience with interweb cameras. There was little doubt that his skills as a technological freek were useful and needed.

His falsely so-called mother Marissa, still unaware of Freddie's previous trip to Redstone Gulch, wondered hypocritically whether there this was a dangerous job, involving hot and sharp objects. This underlines once more how protective she tried to appear to be. But in all reality, she abused Fredward both mentally and physically beyond any imaginable limit, and he was too dumb to understand that he was not her son, but held hostage since his baby age. Marissa would thus certainly object to her son's intentions of filming the wrestling athletes. But the reason for her protests were not — as naïve onlookers believed — the potential dangers for Fredward. He could have been hit by the bully colosses and hurt badly, or at least seen blood flowing freely from the bodies of the wounded athlets. But actually, Marissa did not want Fredward to see and film any doping scenes, as she was heavily involved with those. Already at her daycare for the elderly of downtown Seattle, she had pumped up the grannies, against their will and without their knowledge, with viagra and other perversely disgusting medications in order to corrupt the senile population of Seattle and subdue them to the will of Dr. Wheeler.

Wheeler was able to calm down Marissa, because he had completed all the doping stuff already a few days earlier, right before the time when Zoë Brooks had been made to join. And thus there was no danger left. Without better medical knowledge, Fredward would not be able to betray illegal doping practice.

Trottman was happy when he was allowed to welcome Fredward aboard his team for the regionals.

Freddie would be joined by **Diamond MacGregor**,[29:5] the regular camera expert of Trottman's news channel for Pacific Coast Academy.

* * *

**29:3 The Situation Looks Suspicious**

* * *

**29:3:1 Nevel Meets Zoey**

Zoey Brooks was done with her daily training session, which had once more meant rope jumping. At the same time, Nevel had implemeted the system for the fantasy wrestling match.

We all remember how Chase Matthews had reacted when seeing Zoey for the first time: By riding his bike straight into a flag staff and then slumping to the ground.

Well, Nevel papperman did not even need a flag staff, he was just paralysed upon spotting the blond Mary Sue passing in front of his eyes, and then he floundered and keeled over like a sack of lead. Of course, Nevel had seen Zoey on the web show, but now he was even more impressed.

Zoey turned around, in a way similar to her first action on the campus. "Hey … Nevel, right?" She helped him bac onto his feet.

Nevel sighed. "Nevel Amadeus Papperman! Ms. Brooks?"

Zoey nodded solemnly. "That's me. I remember your criticism of Chase's and Michael's web show. Back then, I had been disappointed, but now I know that you have been right."

Nevel grinned. "No problem!" He panted heavily. "Ouch, this is my pair of good trousers." He blushed. "I hate getting my good suit dirty."

Zoey shrugged, but she could understand that. "Who does? I have designed a few fashionable clothes, and , well, if I have designed and tailored garments all on my own, and they turn dirty … verily … you don't want to hear my screams in such a case."

Nevel remarked: "You are a tailor? Do you kmow that I want to run a haberdashery, once I am grown up?"[29:6]

Zoey shook her head. "No, I did not know. That is interesting!"

Nevel beamed brightly, and then he leant on in order to peck Zoë Brooks on her cheeks. "So we may marry when you are big, and we will run a business together?"

Zoey coughed and moan, "Nevel? What the …" Fortunately, the Mary Sue was a lot cooler than almost all other girls, and she did not lose her mind over that situation. She was flattered, because Nevel had git serious plans, and he did not want to play around with her, as most other guys on the campus would have done. "Nevel, I don't think that this is a good idea. You are about my baby brother's age. Besides that, I have already got Crony!"

Nevel glared aghast. "I am not a baby! Hey, your hair smells like …" He told her about the kind of shampoo that she had used recently. On the other hand, he did not care about any boyfriend Zoey might have had.

Zoë grinned. "Maybe? I have to return to my room, ow. I am exhausted from training for the wrest;ing championships."

Nevel shrugged. "You better don't!"

Zoey sighed. "Well, why should I let my team down? I know, it is stupid that I just have to do ropejumping …"

Nevel explained, "the whole thing is a farce from front to back. I have learned one thing from moderating fantasy high sports games: Everything is a bout money, little is about sports."

Zoey moaned, "makes sense, at this school." She told her that she had grown suspicious during the last years.

Nevel nodded. "I am sure that they abuse some of the rules in order to make illegal bets. This has been done a lot in professional sports. But with greedy sponsors like Blix and Pear, high school sports is not safe, either." He panted heavily. "I've just monitored the fantasy wrestling geme, and the stats are severeluy unbalanced. This cries for a deliberate manipulation!"

Zoey coughed. "Sorry, I am too tired for today. Let's talk about it … tomorrow?"

Nevel nodded solemnly. "OK, blond angel!" He started swooning, but he was ignored by Zoey. Anyways, he would give up on it a bit later, and more precisely: Upon encountering solo oboe Megan Parker, for whom he was the ideal backup pianist.

* * *

**29:3:2 Skippy's Confessions**

Aforementioned Skippy Hickenlooper had worked together with Nevel Papperman on the implementation of the fantasy wrestling system for Pacific Coast Academy. He had been forced to listen to the latter's talk about cheating and manipulation. Now he had got a bad conscience, because he was involved in the whole doping business.

And his confessions came in the best, or worst moment: The pep rally that had been assembled just for the impending wrestling championships. The cheerleading girls, especially Mandy Franklin and Trina Vega, had started dancing and waving seductively with their colourful pompons. Jeremiah Trottman had started interviewing some of the wrestlers, while Freddie was still performing some sound checks.

Dean Rivers waas already standing at the orator's desk, ready to deliver yet another boring speech in which he was going to emphasise the importance of these impending wrestling games for the future of Pacific Coast Academy. Of course he had been urged to do so by the board of sponsors.

Logan Reese and Coach Peters were up to talking as well. of course they were really stupid rhetors. Chase had prepared Logan's words for the sermon, but he had unintentionally chosen a few expressions beyond the jerk's limited horizon.

And while the kjerks and jocks struggled with their own tongue, Skippy Hickenlooper grabbed the microphone, and he started talking about irregularitiues that had been going on behind the scenes: Ugly stuff including Coach Peters and Doc Wheeler. He also mentioned Marissa benson, but he was not aware of the fact that the latter and Doc Wheeler had already been involved in even worse deeds about fifteen years ago.

Freddie Benson was upset, because he was too stupid and obstinate to believe that the woman that he believed wrongly to be his mother was such an evil person. He pulled the plugs and corrupted the records of the nerd's talk, erasing all known evidences of the speech barring eye witnesses, or rather ear witnesses.

But the scandal had already started. Dean Rivers was consternated, and he was going to consult Garth Berman. They would do everything in order to hide the scandal from the outer world. Rivers had not been precisely aware of the doping business, although he had silently and implicitely not only tolerated, but even encouyraged the same during the preceeding years. The same was also valid for Berman, albeit to a lesser degree.

Skippy Hickenlooper was now facing suspension and expulsion, along with getting blacklisted for each college in the country. But he was one of the few pupils at Pacific Coast Academy to ever stand up to the corrupt system. He was a true martyr going through the stages of heroic passion.

* * *

**29:4 The Baby Butt**

Zoë Brooks would soon leave the campus behind, but she needed to know desperately whether she and Marshal Rivera were determined to be a couple also by daylight and by new moon.

The former bully had confessed her his past as a naïve henchman of perverted superbully William Loommer, and what stupidities he had been forced to commit in order to be allowed by him to pass as a boy. But in order to pass as a real couple, Zoey needed to tell him in turn something she was most ashamed of.

A few weaks earlier, **Mrs. Dangle**,[29:7] theteacher of Zoey's classes for psychology, had told her students to enclose such a shameful secret in an envelope, to tie it to an helium-filled balloon, and then to release it skyward.

Zoey's balloon had carried a note about her past as a toddler that had been abused shamelessly as an involuntary model by the greedy cosmetic industry. She was especially disgusted by the fact that her naked hindside had been shown in commercials for some sun blocker, or something like that. The abusive company was **Diamond Cosmetics** from Minnesota.[29:8] While not a sponsor of Pacific Coast Academy, the chain was still a valuable business partner of some other sponsors, and Nicole Bristow had already applied for a paid internship over there. She feared that all students would laugh about her. Fortunately, she did not have to fear too much, as she was about to leave California , anyways, and thus it did not really matter much anymore. But she had to talk to Crony about it, for otherwise, she would feel like a mean cheater.

The two of them met for dinner at Benjamin Singer's booth. The task sharing between Ben and Terrence appeared to work very well. The quality of the smoothies had increased a lot, unfortunately due to the exaggerated usage of high fructose corn sugar. Nicole had talked both ben and T-Bo into using a lot of it. The bimbo wench had become more and more a public relation manager of her father's enterprise.

Zoey Brooks had got difficulties imagining that Ben Singer, although a high school dropout, had once, videlicet: back at middle school, been on the top of the honour rolls of his Rocky Road school.[29:9] She wondered whether she was now going a similar way. The prospects of no longer being the one she used to be bothered her a lot. Life in Frace was different, and maybe she would — or at least that was what she feared — lose her natural Mary Sue's charm in a foreign land.

Ben Singer was in a stingy mood, because the cancellation of the wrestling tournament had ruined his chance for some excruciatingly big business. Terrence Bo had turned equally ill tempered. But for Zoey Brooks, this was not a reason for not coming to Yumburger's catering cart. Alas, she felt a bit bothered because Ben appeared to try to flirt with her. Well, she knew that he was such a weird guy, and she did simply ignore it as much as she was able to. Also, she often countered in a manner that embarrassed the way out of Ben, which was particularly efficient in the presence of his sister Adelaide.

So, embarrassment was Zoey's big problem, and she tackled it right now, talking straight into the face of Jerry Crony. Unfortunately, she had been careless enough to let Ben Singer listen.

Marshal Rivera just shrugged. "What could be worse than attending a middle school ball as a girl and having to cance with Michael?"

Zoey chuckled. "Nothing! Except the pictures of my butt in commercials for sumn blocker."

The two of them chuckled merrily. But then they heard Ben spread the rumours about Zoe's butt. Ben also talked about a similar thing that had occurred to Addie's aforementioned friend Zachariah Carter Schwartz.[29:10]

Fortunately, a lot of students stood up for Zoey, especially those who had gone through the classes of Mrs. Dangle, such as Michael Barret, Chase Matthews, Quinn Pensky, Wayne Gilbert, Lola Martinez, and Stacey Dillsen. Cen was sorry, and he took it all back, in turn for free burgers and smoothies for everyone.

Finally, Marshal Rivera pulled Zoë Brooks into a lingering kiss. This was not a misunderstanding, a rumour, or a dreamwalk, but a plain demonstratio in the daylight. Everyone watched in awe, especially Ben Singer, and thereupon also Dustin and Stella. For weeks, Crony and Zoey had been tortured by the thought why they had not been as uncomplicated as their little siblings. But this problem was now buried in the past forever.

But Zoë Brooks was now ashamed of not having the guts to stand up to the system the way Skippy Hickenlooper had done.

* * *

**29:5 Mean Vendor Machine**

* * *

**29:5:1 Doodlecake Blues**

The healthy but tasty snacks promised by Zoë Brooks had not yet been really finished. The problems were that the girls' favourite fruits were — according to the preliminary calculations by Lisa Zemo — all too expensive for the budget of the project. And Quinn's projects that involved new kinds of delicious fruits had not yet been really successful.

In other words, the unhealthy cookies and cakes offered by Schneider's Bakery were still the one and only pastry available on the campus.

Lola's favourite fruits were still raspberries. And thus she was now looking forward to having a raspberry doodle cake from one of the vendor machines established on the campus by Schneider's Bakery. She picked a one-dollar-note from her pockets and stuck it into the slot. Then she typed the magical combinatio of numbers needed in order to select her chosen snack. Then she waited for the raspberry doodle cake to plummet down the ejection shaft. Alas, something must have been wrong, at least there was no such thing as the expected cake even after some minute. Lola Martinez was desperate, and she tried to punch the machine with her brittle fists. She wished that she had got the power limbs characterising her younger and alike-looking sister Shelby Marx, who would certainly have been able to punch the whole ventor machine into smithereens and then grab all of the exorbitantly tasty raspberry doodlecakes at once. Unfortunately, this was not the case, and thus Lola just appeared to hurt her brittle limbs. She was also looking out for someone like Vince or Dana, and even Trina would have served for the very same purpose, although she was not sure whether her elder sister would not have hurt her even more than the machine by trying to bust the lock with her kung fu skills.

Even bypassing Quinn Pensky sensed that this would happen. "Punching won't quite cut it, you need to kick it!" Then the two girls started trying to beat the cake out of the machine, but they were little successful.

Vice principal **Russel Thatcher**[29:11] saw them kicking the apparatus, and he intervened, telling them that this was illegal. He explained that the only legal option was filing a complaint at the administration office. Then this request would be decided upon during the following months, possibly resulting in some refund. Kids trying to damage the machine would be punished with detention, suspension, expulsion, and deportation to Siberia.

Of course this was not what the Latino diva had expected. In cold Siberia, she wouild have to wear extremely unfashionable fur coats instead of her favourite fishnet bikinis. And the academic year would soon come to an end. She did not have to want until after the summer break for a refund. Until then, she would already have died from raspberry doodle cake withdrawal. And she needed to stay vigorous for the beginnings of the shootings to _Totally Terry_.

So what was she supposed to do?

* * *

**29:5:2 Samantha's Intervention**

Samantha Puckett strolled the campus, looking for trouble. And she did not have to go too far in order to find some series source for it:

Quinn and Lola were still standing at the vendor machine, cursing the stupid mechanism.

Sam growled. "Do youy still need something? Momma is hungry. I need a fat cake, filled with delicious jelly pudding." She rubbed her viciously bellowing tummy. "By the way, Terrence is now selling Blix fatshakes, invented by the same guys who have invented fatcakes."[29:12]

Lola and Quinn took turns explaining the situation. This was really awkward, iun particular due to the steadily increasing anger inside the Latino drama queen.

Sam chuckled. "You are really angry, and not just acting?"

Quinn had to hold Lola back in order to prevent her from hitting Sam. She kne w very well that the drama queen would have just hurt herself.

Sam alias Trisha shook her head. Then she took a closer look at the mechanism of the maledicted vendor machine. "A hair needle will do!" She whistled innocently and started fumbling with her pockets.

Lola smiled, remarking: "Cool, this always works in movies, with security locks or so. I've never seen that done for real, though."

Looking around the campus square, Quinn sighed deeply. "There are surveillance cameras everywhere." She had learned how to detect them at the end of the previous year, after she had been fooled into believing Malcolm Reese's lie: :ike her pals, she had falsely supposed that the cams

Lola looked intimidated. "Even if Thatcher is not around, he will notice us fumbling with the machines." She suspired. "On the other hand … that is kind of a reality TV show, isn't it?" She smiled and waved while looking into some direction where she supposed one of the hidden surveillance cameras to be watching her.

Sam Puckett announced, "no problem, for momma knows how to deal with hidden cameras and to produce phantom pictures."

Lola looked puzzled, thinking about the possibilities of manipulating hidden cameras in order to improve her career by producing even cooler short movies.

Quinn nodded solemnly. "Sam really does, you can trust her there!"

Lola smiled. "OK!" She took one last look at the doodle cake. "You just try to keep on taunting me! Enjoy your doomed life as long as you can! But I will be back, and than you are due!"

* * *

**29:5:3 Totally Terry**

Especially Dustin Brooks and his girlfriend Stella Rivera were curious to know about _Totally Terry_, the new TV show of _Dingo Channel_ featuring Lola Martinez. They strolled the campus and stumbled into the nerd princess and the drama queen.

Basically, _Totally Terry_ was going to be a show about kids at a boarding school just like Pacific Coast Academy, and there would be many funny skits mixed into the daily drudgery of high school kids.

Listening carefully, Dustin detected that many of the amin cast characters were basically copies of Lola and her friends at Pacific Coast Academy. He recognised a Zoey, a Quinn, a Dana, a Nicole, a Chase, a Logan, and a Michael.

Lola gasped. "Really? I am going to portray myself?" She smiled triumphantly. "I don't think so!" She sighed, because she would have liked to boast with the fact how hard her character was for acting.

Stella confirmed the statement. "Yes, you will be totally yourself!" She noticed everyone nodding.

Dustin wondered, "does terry have a little brother?" He beamed because he hoped that he was also the model for a character of a popular teenage soap opera.

Lola shrugged helplessly. She did not know that there was indeed a brother for Terry, but he would be totally underused and neglected by Dingo, the producers of the show.

* * *

**29:5:4 The Hair Needle**

Samantha had finally tricked all cameras into sending fake pictures. This was much better than just disabling the monitoring devices. While the latter option would have prevented the school administration from watching the campus, they would have noticed immediately that there were missing pictures. Thus Samantha's work had been very efficient.

And now it was the right time for the baby burglar from downtown Seattle to pick the lock of the vendor machine. A hair needle from her pockets was enough. Two seconds later, the back door of the vendor case fell off like a ripe banapple.

Lola grinned when she picked her doodle cake. "OK, you bad yet tasty cake! Now you are overdue!" She ripped the plastic wrapping apart and started to chew the doodle cake slowly, as if punishing it sadistically for its previous obstinacy.

At the same time, Samantha had to help Quinn to repair the backdoor of the bendor machine. Fortunately, the geek princes had always got a tool box for any case hidden in the souls of her shoes.[29:13] And Samantha had been careful enough to cause only minimal damage, for otherwise, Quinn would have been forced to order some heavy tools and grease from Jospeh Braxly. So the repairs were progressing fast, and there was no way for Thatcher to notice that there was something going on.

But here, Quinn Pensky noticed something weird. "There is a built-in transponder for a remote control built into the locking mechanism!" Unfortunately, she needed to hurry up in order to complete the whole action before Thatcher was about to return in person for some random routine itinerary, or the manipulation of the video cameras was discovered. Thus she could only guess what it was good for, and her discovery was shocking.

**_"_**  
Who ever wholds the remote control … he is able to block and unblock the ejection mechanism at whim.

In other words, there is a big chance that Lola's problem is not an accident.

Someone used a remote control in order to deny Lola the raspberry doodle cake she had already paid for.

**_"_**

Lola growled, "so … who hates me so much?"

Quinn shrugged. "I would have to be able to trace the transponder signals. In order to do so, I need something from my laboratory."

Dustin sighed. "Hurry up! Maybe the Russian spies are behind it!"

Stella nodded vigorously. "The Russians have always wanted to block out Hollywood. They were oppressors, and they needed to prevent the voice of freedom from taking over Russia."

While her assessment of Soviet Russia was not wrong, she seemed to assume that Hollywood was undeniably a stronghold of freedom in this world. But the corruption from the hands of economic interests had turned it into something completely different: Hollywood had long since ceased to be a representant of freedom, but it was just a different system of oppression than the soviet system, a more subtle and subliminal version of brainwash and manipulation exerted by the mighty producers in order to propagate their own economic interests.

Lola scratched her head. "What if Zoey is behind it? She has never wanted me to eat unhealthy snacks."

Dustin moaned, "oh, I know that feeling." He sobbed in agony.

Stella wondered, "maybe it is some racist who hates Latinos?"

Lola gasped. "Come on, Stella, we need to gather for a special session. You call all the middle school Latinos to the arms, I will do the same with our high school brethren."

The two kids of Middle American background started run away.

Dustin shrugged. "Is it really just a racist creep?"

Quinn sighed. "I am sure the chip has not been inserted by some freak, and I know that only Mindy Crenshaw is able to." She panted heavily. "She better ain't, but …"

Dustin told Quinn to check the situation immediately. "Woe if some creep does something to Stella!"

Quinn waved at Dustin. "I am going to check on site."

* * *

**29:5:5 Analysing The Microchip**

Melinda Crenshaw was about to leave the laboratory rooms when Quinn Pensky arrived at the same place. "Hi Quinn, done with your experiments about antigravity? At least I have thought so."

Quinn nodded. "Correct! But now there is something more serious."

Mindy gasped. "What is it?"

Quinn started talking about her discovery inside the vendor machine, and she described the micropchip as accurately as she had been able to after having it seen for a few seconds only. She noticed Mindy going increasingly pale, and thus she started asking more directly: "Have you got somethingto do with it?"

Mindy choked. "Sorry, my social studies classes …" She tried to run away, but Quinn was faster, so it was not possible for Mindy to escape.

More precicely, Quinn leaped onto the back of her colleague from San Diego and brought her down to the ground, like a real ninja. "So, what have you got to do with the microchip? Where is the remote control?"

Mindy coughed and choked. "Not here … I designed the device, but not for me …"

Quinn sighed and nodded. "OK!" She jumped off Mindy's back. "Whom was it for?"

Melinda Crenshaw got back onto her feet. "Dean Rivers …" She coughed and puked. "He told me that he was too lazy to go to the vendor machine, and thus he needed a remote control to do that for him."

Quinn sighed deeply. "Maybe the office machine went above his head. I should not have gone out of my way."

Mindy shrugged. "That had been my fault, too."

So far, the geek girls had still got the option of believing all this to be an accident, because Dean Rivers wanted to purchase a snack from the machine at the same time as Lola, leading to conflicts and blocking the ejection shaft.

But Quinn scratched her chin. "According to the health food freaks, Rivers had objected to offering healthier snacks because the vendor machines were verty profitable gfor them."

Mindy nodded solemnly. "You think … this remote control had made it profitable? Sacking the students at whim? The creep has tricked me." She banged her head hard against the wall. "Ouch!"

Quinn suspired several times in a row. "And I am sure that vice principal Thatcher is behind the whole scandal as well. For that reason, he did not want us students to take a closer look at the machine."

Mindy nodded solemnly. "I will ask Claire Sawyer, she should do something about it! She sure knows a law or two against all the cheating."

Quinn agreed, and she had to stop Lola Martinez and Stella Rivera, before they started a rebellion of all Latino students against the school administration for little reason and get themselves into trouble. She feared that the consequences would have been basically something comparable to the green tornado that had threatened them out in the canyon. But she was thoroughly mistaken, in the sense that she underestimated the turmoil experienced in the canyon. She thought that her science was able to explain everything, but due to her positivist attitude, she was unable to see beyond the surface.

* * *

**Chapter 30 The Final Countdown**

* * *

**30:1 The Birthday Party**

* * *

**30:1:1 Chase And His Grandmother**

The favourite grandmother of Chase Matthews was born the same day of the year, albeit — of course — decades earlier.

Chase was about to choose a birthday card on the interweb, to print out and send to the old lady. He had always been looking forward for this day of the year. Unfortunately, they had not been able to spend it together since Chase's departure for California. In other words: Thid was the fifth time straight that the bushy dork and his grandmom would have to celebrate their common birthday some thousand miles apart. His grandmother was already fairly old, and Chase had to fear that each year would possibly be the last year for her. And he would have given a lot in order to spend at least one more birthday with her, as long as she was still among the living.

At least the weather reporter announced nice weather for the next few days, including Chase's birthday. But this particular weather reporter was once more mno other than Walter Nichols, the step father of Drake Parker. And as we all know by now, this Walter Nichols was not only a poor example of s father and husband, but an even worse example of a weather reporter. He had failed miserably to foresee the rainy night during which Chase had tried to unearth the time capsule in order to figure what Zoey had thought about him. The only alternative to Walter Nichols was still Brice Windchill, and he predicted heavy rain storms. Unfortunately, Windchill's forecast was only visible in a few selected networks.

* * *

**30:1:2 Planning**

Chase should have been looking forward to his birthday, because his room pals had always been able to organise a nice party for him. But, unfortunately, he was busy with his homework. There was some urgent assignment due the day after his birthday, and he needed to hurry a lot.

Logan Reese and Michael Barret had been discussing the possibilities for Chase's birthday party for several hours already, and now they had moved into the lounch in order to have a blix and a slice of pizza.

Of course, they would want to hear the opinion of the other students as well, at least as some kind of a referee.

Finally, Logan and Michael agreed that a surprise party was overdue. But the question was now: What kind of party was most suitable?

Logan's idea was that of a beach party. "The girls have to wear bikinis!"

Michael choked. "Doesn't sound bad, but … Addie won't like it."

Logan growled, "who cares about that boring lass! Just don't invite any freshmen."

Michael glared at Logan. "Addie is Chase's girlfriend, you can't expect him to go to a borthday party without her. You don't really want Dana to either miss out on the party, or to show up with a bikini in the middle of a big cloud of other guys? And what if Stacey Dillsen shows up … in a bikini?"

The content of Logan's stomach was immediately momented upwards and spouted across the lounge like a whale's fountain. He called teh janitors, sighing deeply. "OK, that is correct. Go and ask the girls as well!" Then he alerted some other boys, telling them to come up with ideas for a surprise party for Chase.

Michael picked up his mobile telephone in order to call Adelaide Singer, in order to discuss possibilities of a surprise party for Chase.

The guys started discussing wildly until the arrival of Adelaide Singer and Wendy Gellar.

Addie talked about Chase's grandmother. "He will have to think a lot about her during the party. She is already old and a bit frail."

Michael wondered, "would she come to his birthday? Logan may charter a machine in order to …"

Logan choked. "I will do what? Michael? Are you crazy?" Of course he would have had the means to do so, as his father had got a provate jet machine in New York City, where Malcolm Reese maintained a small outpost. But he just did not want to. "Celebrating parties with elderly people is no fun at all!" He was immediately supported by many other guys loitering in the lounge.

Addie protested: "This is Chase's birthday, and his grandmother means such a lot to him. They will most likely not have many occasions left. But you will have a lot more occasions for having fun, right? Prom, homecoming, …"

Michael shrugged. "Probably …"

Logan moaned due to disappointment. The same was valid for Dana, Lola, and Nicole.

But the Latino diva had thought about a compromise: "Chase's grandma is already a bit old, she should not make the trip to Los Angeles, it is dangerous. And Marissa benson will probably want to care about her, and she is so …" She was close to puking.

Addie sighed. "That's true, who would want her to go down and get treated by Fredward's mom?"

Lola continued: "How about making a two-way connection … with the help of a webcamera?" She scratched her head, because she did not understand much about technology.

Addie smiled. "Great! We may have a fun party over here, grandma has got a party at home, and Chase and grannie may chat at the same time over the interweb! Go and tell Freddie about it!"

Lola and Addie shook hands in a fanciful manner.

Michael suggest: "So … how about a party with crazy hats? I love crazy hat parties!"

Wendy smiled. "Cool!"

Everyone cheered, thus the case was settled.

* * *

**30:1:3 Unhappy Birthday, Chase!**

The party had begun, and it was celebrated inside the lounge. The weather had not been any good for any kind of outdoor party: Once more, Walter Nichols had proven himself a complete idiot. The rain kept on drumming almost rhythmically against the windows and the pavement. A cold wind whistled through the roof tops, filling the inhabitants of the campus with some uneasy feeling.

Chase was finally done with his assignments. He was not really surprised by the party, though, because a certain idiot known as Logan Reese had mailed him an invitation to the party. Bear with it!

The chat connection with Chase's grandma's home had also been established, and this had not been easy, because the old lady did not understand much about laptops, the interweb, and cameras. Fortunately, Michael fad found someone near the grandmother's home able to help her out. Chase and his grandma were now chatting merrily, while the party guests made fun of each other's fanciful hat or cap. Even Chase's grandma had donned one, and that was a really old example of a conical hat. Quinn Pensky had added some sparkling illumination to her own headwear. With the help of a fashion designer like Zoë Brooks, this could easily have sparked a new trend in fashion. Alas, the most sparkling source of light were those periodically occurring flashes of lightening, roaming the sky above Malibu.

Zoë Brooks was hanging out at the party as well, although she was still not forgiving the fraudulent deeds of Chase. She had even designed some of the party hats. Her own headwear was a typical hat of Napoléon Bonaparte, the great ruler of France from 1800. This was of course no less than an allusion to her impending departure from California in order to cross the mighty Atlantic. Listening to the sound of the salvoes of murderous rain drops bombarding the campus, combined with the lightning flashes and thunder roars in the likeness of the firing cannons and the rockets' crimson glare, she was reminded of standing in the middle of a huge battle field, such as Waterloo, the little town in Belgium that had become long since the eponym for a disastrous defeat and the end of a great era. But not only her era as a student at Pacific Coast Academy was all but gone.

There was one big thunder roar here at Malibu, and at the same time, a scenario of horror was triggered, as if there had been some connection: Chase's grandma collapsed in the middle of a laugh and slumped to the ground.

Chase was of course consternated, and he cried for his beloved ancestor, but neither shaking the screen nor telling at the keyboard seemed to help. Minutes later, some neighbour of the old lady would confirm the death of the old grandma, and this way. But Chase did not even need the official news, he knew that the world was breaking doen in front of his eyes.

Addie Singer was of course here for him. She remembered the death of her grandaunt Bertha,[30:1] which had been apparently a problem for her, although she had tried to ignore it. Indeed, this had been the trigger for her interest in Edgar Allan Poe's poetry circling around topics like death and decay.

Both Chase Matthews and Adelaide Singer had to think simultaneously about one of their absolute favourite poems: _The Raven_. Thence they muttered silently: "Never more. Never more!"

The dark and stormy night over Malibu, as if it had not already wreaked enough havoc, was not willing to relax its grip on the campus. Quite the contrary: The electric lights went out once more.

This was the perfect time for Quinn's improved and upgraded electricity supply system.

But Michael Barret talked the onlookers into refraining from partying. "There is no reason for doing so, please step back!"

Quinn sighed, and she decided to let the rest of the night stay as pitch-black as can be. This seemed to be a pious action, especially after her shock up in the canyon. But her piety was howllow and vain.

Chase was annoyed by the fact that everyone else was now aware of the reason for his sadness. He would have preferred to keep it to as few people as possible,a s he knew now that Logan would make endlessly fun of his grandma's death. The creepty jerk from Beverly Hills had never shown any awe for the dead, as demonstrated by his attempt of marketing the legend of my untimely death, and by going out of his way upon the Halloween celebrations of 2005.

On the up side, Chase would have suffered a lot more on the long run, slowly and painfully, if his grandmother had died completely in his absence. He would not have forgiven himself the fact that he had not seen her since Christmas break.

* * *

**30:2 Talents**

* * *

**30:2:1 Dustin's Plan**

Unlike the high school students, middle school kids had not been invited to the party, because of the school's laws for parties and curfews.

Dustin had already fallen asleep. There was no natural way for him to experience anything going on outside: The uncommon thunder storm, the power breakdown, the death of Chase's grandmother, the cataracts pouring down from the roof of his residence hall.

For him, like for a big deal of the middle school kids of Pacific Coast Academy, the talent show was one of the climaxes of the academic year. It had been mpved to the very end for organisational reasons. As you probably remember, the same kind of event had occurred much earlier in the course of the academic year when Zoë Brooks had still been a middle school girl.

Dustin had recently watched a so-called magic show featuring grandmaster **Harry Doheny**.[30:2] And now he was stoked, because he thought that he would be able to perform one of his tricks: Sawing a virgin into half.

Finally, morning was about to break. Dustin was waking up, but not due to the sound of the volleys of rain drops or of thunder roars. The bad weather had finally stopped, leaving traces of havoc all over the place. Rather, his room pal Robbie Carmichael alias Scooter was screaming all over the place because he had seen some dead bugs on the pavement that had been flushed off the roof by the heavy rain. Dustin yawned. Officially, Robert was assigned as his partner for the impending talent show, and thus he would have to saw him into half. But Dustin knew very well that there was no way to use him as a brace virgin waiting calmly in the black box for being divided by Dustin's sharp saw.

Regardless of whom he was about to saw apart, Dustin was also worried about teh audience. His sister Zoey was probably not going to watch him, because she wanted to go to a book presentation in Malibu. Her favourite author of fluff novel was coming to down: **Jadie Hawthorne**.[30:3] Needless to say, the blond Mary Sue was not willing to miss out on this unique occasion of meeting up with her, and she was especially fond of being allowed to ask her a few questions.

* * *

**30:2:2 An Improved And Upgraded Trick**

Stella Rivera met Dustin at the breakfast, and she wanted to make a very important suggestion: She wanted to be the virgin in Dustin's coffin!

Zoey's little brother gasped. "Cool!" He wondered why he had not thought about this earlier. "At least your brother will watch the performance, unlike …"

Stella sighed deeply. "Yeah, it must hurt you a lot, almost like this thunderstorm." She looked at the massive amount of traces left by the nightly bombardment with heavy rain drops.

Dustin sighed deeply. "I wonder how I had been able to sleep through all that! It must have been terrible."

Megan Parker walked in. "Hi! Have you heard it? Chase's grandmom is dead!" She had had a vision during the rain storm, fairly similar to the green tornado out in the canyon. For her, there was no doubt about the fact that the bad weather was just the next number in a series of grisly experiences striking the students of Pacific Coast Academy, and that their ignorant demeanour with respect to the unseen worlds was the trigger of the thunderstorm. But she knew that she would not be taken serious by the vulgar and naïve mass of the students of Pacific Coast Academy. Basically, she knew that only Nevel Papperman was able to accept her ideas. The latter was also deemed a spaz by those people who had been brainwashed by the materialist society, but he was not going to budge from his path of truth and justice.

Stella gasped. "That must be why Wendy had been so consternated. She did not even answer my questions."

Megan nodded. "She has heard the news from Addie, and she is now with Michael. He suffers a lot from it, because he had not been able to comfort Chase, when they saw the old lady collapse … on the other side of the telechat connection."

Stella sighed. "That must be the curse of the ghost … Galloway."

Dustin shivered. "Please, Megan needs to set him to rest! You can do it. You beguile squirrels, furious dogs, skunks …" He groaned, "why not ghosts?"

Megan nodded. "OK, I will need the help of Nevel Papperman and osme other great guys, though." She suspired. "So, what about your trick? The half of a virgin?"

Dustin wrapped his arm around Stella. "She is my assisitant!"

Megan nodded. "Cool! I wondered how Robbie Carmichael got selected in the first place." She shook her head. "Maybe we should spice up your trick a bit up, though."

Dustin moaned, "he is really a pest, but I like him anyways."

Megan continued, "I had a great idea for spicing up your trick. But it looks a bit too macabre, after last night" She sighed, because she still pitied Chase for what he was going to, and seeing a corpse, even a fake one, on the stage would not have done him justice. But she sensed that Chase would get over it, for as a true fan of Edgar Allan Poe, he was accustomed to even worse horror stories.

Dustin and Stella were of course curious.

Megan's plan was now much simpler: She just wanted to play her oboe while Dustin was feigning to cut through hios girlfriend's abdomen.

* * *

**30:2:3 Blackmailing Rivers**

It was hard for Zoey to find someone to take her downtown for the book presentation in Malibu.

But Jennifer Mosely had got an idea to help her here. She was the president of the girls' book club, and she had got the idea to invite Jadie Hawthorne to the campus for another presentation of the same book. Thus Mrs. Hawthorne would come to Zoë, instead of vicew versa. The latter would thus be allowed to watch her brother's number at the talent show, which would prevent her from becoming unhappy after leaving Dustin behind.

Of course this would not be an easy enterprise, because Jadie was busy, and she would not do it for naught. The manager was requesting five thousand dollars, as much as Drake Parker's manager had once required for the star's presence at the spring fling in 2005.

Fortunately, the club was allowed to request some bucks from the school administration. Lisa Zemo was responsible for the fiances, and she had already submitted a form that had been compiled with the help of Claire Sawyer. Of course it was necessary to justify the high expenses to the school administration. Once more, Dean Rivers proved incredibly obstinate. Not even the argument that Zoë Brooks had done so much for the renown of the school, and that she duly deserved such a reward for all that, was of little avail.

Finally, Claire Sawyer mentioned the scandals she was aware of, especially the doping troubles and the corrupted vendor machines. "The _Malibu Tribune_ will not skip such an opportunity." She had also collected a lot of proof for the misdeeds and neglects committed by the school administration, either deliberately or carelessly.

Dean Rivers was consternated. A few weeks ago, **Sheila Voss**, the headmaster of **Cedar Valley** near Fresno, had been busted for a school scandal by pseudonymous reporter **Shredderman**. These news were not pleasant for the principal of Pacific Coast Academy. He would have been even more consternated, had he known that Shredderman was really **Nolan Byrd**, the cousin of Jennifer's ex-boyfriend Edmond Bigby. Of course, Jennifer, Lisa, and Claire were up to informing Nolan, just in case. After some minutes of cascades of sweat, the dean finally gave in and granted the funds needed for the visit of the modern literary genius.

* * *

**30:2:4 We've Got A Baby**

The stage was only dimly lit, and everyoe was attending the number of Dustin Brooks and Stella Rivera.

The young Latina was already accomodated in the black box. Dustin controlled the chain blade. Megan started blowing her oboe. The sound of the music added a lot of dramatic to this ancient an dstill popular variety trick.

Zoey and Crony watched from the first row, and they were most excited. Of course they hoped their little siblings to win.

The trick went smooth, but the cunnig little vixen from San Diego would not have offered her musical aid if she had not yet got another surprise up her sleeves.

Dustin had just glued the box again after cutting it into half, an he opened the cover in order to allow Stella to climb out. There was already a lot of applause.

But then Stella remarked. "Oops, darling, I forgopt something in the box, Would you please look it up?"

Dustin smiled. "Sure, sweetie!" he reopened the cover. "Stella? What is this?" He pulled a toddler out the dark box. It belonged actually to Mr. Bender, and Megan had borrowed it for the performance. "We've got baby?"

Stella smiled. "Sure, my love! That is my surprise gift for you!"

Dustin purred. "Aw, sweetie."

The two lovebirds took the toddler into their arms and faced the audience for a final wave of applause.

Zoey's and Crony's hearts stood still for a moment, as they had not seen that coming.

There was no way to deny the first prize to Dustin and Stella.

* * *

**30:2:5 Jadie Hawthorne**

As aforementioned, Zoë Brooks knew Jadie Hawthorne as an author of fluffy novels. Some of the latter had already been converted into movies, so called **chick flicks** — or that's what Logan Reese called them. Malcolm Reese had been the producer of one of them. The main actress had been **Melinda Murray**,[30:4] an arrogant actress. But Zoey had enjoyed the movie anyways. Even Lola would have loved to appear in a moving picture version of some of Jadie's novel, although she was too lazy to read any of them.

But this was only a very superficial understanding of the life and the works of Jadie Hawthorne. True connoisseurs of the history of American liturature were certainly aware of one of the greatest icons of world literature: **Nathaniel Hawthorne**. Even the harry Schneider library hosted some of the most popular works of this master of the romance: _The Scarlet Letter_, _The House Of The Seven Gables_, and _The Blithedale Romance_. This was not a random agreement, although Jadie was nothing like a relative of grandmaster Nathaniel. Rather, Jadie had chosen her pen name precisely because of Nathaniel Hawthorne.

For people with an excessively vulgar understanding of literature, such as Logan Reese, _romance_ is about tantamount to _love story_. But this is definitely a modern corruption and perversion of the true meaning. No one less than Nathaniel Hawthorne had been able to give some most appropriate definitionion of the word. In any case, a **romance** is a fiction of substantial length with a symbolic rather than realistic approach to characters and plot. Jadie Hawthorne's stories may have appeared to naïve readers like fluff novels, but this was just a thin disguise for a massive amount of symbolism and metaphorics going on underneath the surface.

Zoey Brooks was not aware of all this, but this was about to change.

It was time for Jennifer Mosely, the president of the book club of Pacific Coast Academy, to introduce today's special guest. The club's room was already filled when the star entered the scene.

Jennifer did not have to say much about Jadie, for, judging according to the reaction of the audience, everyone was already somewhat familiar with the visitor. But she emphasised that this visit was in partcularly a gift for soon departing Zoey Brooks, the girl who had contributed most to the development of this school since going coeducational.

Zoey stood up in order to shake hands with Jadie, and then she sat down again.

Jadie started talking about her new book: _Black Snow_. The title had to be understood allegorically. Once more, this looked like a fluffy novel, although it was really but a thinly veiled assault upon commonly held moral views about family and relationships.

Zoey had got a lot of inspiring question. It was not always easy for Jadie to come up with answers, but she was very much inspired by the reactions of the blond Mary Sue. Finally, she decided to dedicate her next work almost entirely to the life and times of Zoë Brooks: A biography in the form of a romance.

* * *

**30:2:6 Dream Of The Hallways**

Quite a few people seem to believe that the last dream before a huge trip is forshading the looming adventures.

Zoë Brooks was now at that point, and she was already totally anxious. So this was her last dream before the departure:

**_"_**  
I was entering an old yet still stable-looking fortress.

There were hallways and rooms, the doors were closed.

I opened one door, just to see … more hallways.

The same was valid for each other door I opened.  
**_"_**

This must have been a very scary dream for the blond mary Sue. Endless corridors and dungeons with twisty little passages were typical i the European analogue of the kind of fiction established in America by literary genius Edgar Allan Poe: Gothic literature of the seventeenth century. In other words: The same topics would keep on worrying Zoey's troubled mind once again, even in the the good old world.

Zoey took Jerome Crony alias Marshal Rivera alias Olivary Biallo once more into her arms before it was time for her to say good-bye to Pacific Coast Academy. Her tears were running like a cataract, because she knew that this school was doomed. The separation from her boyfriend was not that hard, because the same moon would still keep on shining over both California and France, and thus the true lovers would remain united in their heart. But for the broad mass of the students, all hope was lost. Zoey's mind had been strong, but her friends and fellow students were feeble, and inspite of her own supernatural efforts and her typical charm, the perfect Mary Sue alone was too weak to save the school.

The name _Zoë_ derives from a Greek term for _life_, and thus the departure of the Mary Sue was tantamount to sucking the life for out of Pacific Coast Academy. Meudon Prep would be another school, and another life. The problems of the most illustrious Californian boarding school were probably also familiar to French prep schools, and maybe Zoey was desperately needed in order to solve them. maybe she would be supported better by her fellow students at Meudon. But this was by no means my business.

* * *

**30:3 Released**

* * *

**30:3:1 Dies Iræ**

Nevel Papperman and Megan Parker had finally organised the orchestra for a requiem. The orchestra and choir was directed by **Mr. Combover**,[30:5] the adviser of the glee club of James K. Polk. Jessica Novicky and Nicls Jacobsen were here as much as Kelly Peckinpaw, a fledgling violinist.

Megan and Nevel had chosen some wonderful medieval penitential hymn for the requiem:

**_"_**  
Dies iræ, dies illa  
Solvet sæclum in favilla.  
Teste David cum Sybilla.

Quantus Tremor est venturus  
Quando iudex est venturus  
Cuncta strictæ discussurus.  
**_"_**

These lines, and many subsequent ones, are generally ascribed to one Thomas of Cælano, a medieval monk of the Franciscan fraternity. They had been the base of many funeral choirs, and they had still been part of the canon missæ of the Roman church before my untimely departure from life in flesh and blood. Only the secon Vaticanum had officially disposed with them. The verses describe the impending end of the known world, according to ancient witness.

But fortunately, Megan Parker, the uncontestable princess of the solo oboe, was irreverent of the judgment of some powermongers in the so-called eternal city. In her eyes, this vision of the looming dystopia was still the most appropriate piece of lyrics to accompany the restless soul to their further destiny. She was confirmed in her appraisal by her beloved boyfriend Nevel Amadeus Papperman, the prince of the backup piano. They deemed it as an appropriate way of a prayer for the dead. Certainly, she knew that it was far from optimal, but she had to do with what was available for her.

The marvellous sound of Megan's oboe and her fellow musicians was finally resetting my soul. I was now freed from being tied to the life and history of Pacific Coast Academy, awaiting Nirvana. No longer was I forced to watch what was going on, and now longer was I tempted or even able to interfer with the life and the mind of the students, be it in their dreams or in the daily adventures.

* * *

**30:3:2 The Wild Hunt**

The following years would see the memories of the brave Mary Sue decrease, as she was an anathema to those who wanted to keep Pacific Coast Academy as it was, as they either profited from the status quo, or were blindly following their usual egoistical goals.

So while a few pupils were able to see the light, the broad mass of the students and staff members of this most illustrious and elitarian boarding school, such as Fredward Benson and Samantha Puckett, kept on adoring and kneeling in front of the altars of the idols of capitalism, imperialism, and realism. The aforementioned last words of the great fatidical poet Edgar Allan Poe were engraved into the pavement of the campus squared and scribbled onto the walls of the dormitory halls,[30:6] with an ink made of the tears of departing Zoë Brooks.

Both during the incident in the canyon and during the day of the fledgling deluge, some pupils had had visions of ghastly horsemen roaming the welkin above.[30:7] These visions reappeared over and over again during the following years, blurred dreams of dark riders using black unicorns with a horn made of steel, enshrouded in crimson flames. But those warnings would be ignored, and finally, the ultimate darkness would break down upon Pacific Coast Academy, just as Poe's red death.

**_REQUIESCAT IN PACE_**

* * *

** 1:1**:  
guest from _Zoey 101_: _The Curse Of PCA_  
**1:2**:  
mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Prank Week_.  
**1:3**:  
alludes to the site where part of _Zoey 101_ was shot  
**1:4**:  
building in _Zoey 101_: _Robot Wars_  
**1:5**:  
from _Victorious_: _Tori The Zombie_  
**1:6**:  
from _The iCarly Show_: _iPromote Techfoots_  
**1:7**:  
from _Zoey 101_: _Jet-X_  
**1:8**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Robot Wars_!  
**1:9**:  
school mentioned multiply throughout _Victorious_ and identified with **Eastridge** from _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Break_  
**1:10**:  
Glazer is a cameo in đ: _The Bet_ et alibi  
**1:11**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Pilot_ and _Good-Bye, Zoey!_ with a first name from same actor's character in some third party production  
**1:12**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Good-Bye Zoey!_ with a first name from same actor's character in some third party production  
**1:13**:  
allusion to third party owned song _Dust In The Wind_ by **Kansas**  
**1:14**:  
insinuated in _Zoey 101_: _Jet-X_  
**1:15**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Silver Hammers_.  
**1:16**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Surprise_.  
**1:17**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iMight Switch Schools_  
**1:18**:  
This is **Cal** from _The iCarly Show_: _iGo Nuclear_. The name is from third party owned science fiction novel _The Island Earth_, which is alluded to down the road  
**1:19**:  
cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Quinn's Alpaca_ with a first name from some appearance of the same actor in some third-party owned production  
**1:20**:  
according to _Zoey 101_: _Little Beach Party_  
**1:21**:  
cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Quinn's Alpaca_ with a first name from some appearance of the same actress in some third-party owned production  
**1:22**:  
the first name is only mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Quinn's Alpca_  
**1:23**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Alone At PCA_!  
**1:24**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Son Of A Dean_  
**1:25**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _The Great Vince Blake_ where Rivers mentions his son in law  
**1:26**:  
cameos in _Zoey 101_: _Quinn's Alpaca_ and _Zoey 101_: _Coffee Cart Ban_  
**1:27**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Quinn's Alpaca_!  
**1:28**:  
mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Pilot_  
**1:29**:  
This is Mr. Bradford from _Zoey 101_: _Prank Week_, with a first name from some rôle of the same actor in some third party owned movie.  
**2:1**:  
a multiple anonymous cameo, e.g. from _Zoey 101_: _The Radio_  
**2:2**:  
cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Webcam_ with a surname taken from same actor's rôle in third party owned _Judging Amy_  
**2:3**:  
identifies cameo Darren from _Zoey 101_: _Webcam_ with Critter from _Just Jordan_: _Critter Bites_ and an anonymous cameo of the same actor in _Unfabulous_: _Balancing Act_  
**2:4**:  
repeated character from _Zoey 101_, with a surname borrowed from the same actor's performance in some third-party owned movie  
**2:5**:  
based on statements from _Zoey 101_: _Hot Dean_  
**2:6**:  
a cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Hot Dean_, identified with Body Slam Bubba from some late _Unfabulous_ episodes, an anonymous security guard in _Victorious_: _Wanko's Warehouse_ and an anymous cameo of the same actor in _Drake & Josh_: _Demonator_  
**2:7**:  
guest in _True Jackson VP_: _True Fear_  
**2:8**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iHatch Chicks_!  
**2:9**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Spring Breakup_  
**2:10**:  
cameo nicknamed "Vicky" in _Zoey 101_: _Pilot_ et alibi, with a first name borrowed from a rôle of the same actress in som third party owned production  
**2:11**:  
anonymous cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Pilot_ et alibi, with a name paodising the actress's name  
**2:12**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Pilot_ et alibi, with a family name borrowed from the same actor's rôle in some third party owned production  
**2:13**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Pilot_ with a first name borrowed from the same actor's appearance in some third-party owned production  
**2:14**:  
guest in _Victorious_: _Freak The Freak Out_  
**2:15**:  
guest from _Victorious_: _Freak The Freak Out_  
**2:16**:  
cf. _Victorious_: _Freak The Freak Out_!  
**3:1**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Paige At PCA_ and _Zoey 101_: _Roller Coaster_  
**3:2**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Zoey's Tutor_ and _Michael Loves Lisa_  
**3:3**:  
a cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Bad Girl_ with a first name borrowed from some appearance of the same actor in some third-party owned production  
**3:4**:  
regular from _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_ with a first name borrowed from the same actor's appearance in some third party owned production  
**3:5**:  
guest in _Supah Ninjas_: _Mr. Bradford_  
**3:6**:  
the profession of Logan Reese's grandfather is alluded to in _Zoey 101_: _Zoey's Tutor, although the first name is made up here_  
**3:7**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Jet-X_  
**3:8**:  
Neil appears a few tims only throughout _Zoey 101_, ands the surname is a spoof off the actor's surname.  
**3:9**:  
a guest in _Zoey 101_: _Robot Wars_ with a surname borrowed from the same actor's character in some third party owned production.  
**3:10**:  
guest from _Drake & Josh_: _Number One Fan_ with a surname from same actress's character in third party owned _Camp Rock_

also identified with an unportrayed Wendy mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Lola Likes Chase_  
**3:11**:  
both Addie Singer from _Unfabulous_ and cameo Addie from _Drake & Josh_: _Honor Council_  
**3:12**:  
the canon of _Unfabulous_ does not offer a precise localisation of this place, so much is made up here.  
**3:13**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _New Roomies_!  
**3:14**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Surprise_!  
**3:15**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Time Capsule_!  
**3:16**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Helen's Surgery_  
**4:1**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Webcam_!  
**4:2**:  
the surname is from a character oif the same actor in some third party owned show  
**4:3**:  
e.g. the one depicted in _Drake & Josh_: _I Love Sushi_  
**4:4**:  
mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Webcam_  
**4:5**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Girls Will Be Boys_!  
**4:6**:  
state mentioned in _Drake & Josh_: _We're Married_

mentioned movie also appears in _The iCarly Show_: _iQ_, but is there miscredited as a Russian movie. Due to the utter absurdity of latter episodes of _The iCarly Show_, that episode is just seen as a nightmare of confused Carly Shay and holds no valuable information  
**4:7**:  
guest from _Zoey 101_: _Spring Fling_, identifieed with cameo Brexly from _The iCarly Show_: _iPromote Techfoots_  
**4:8**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Quinn's Alpaca_ et alibi with a surname borrowed from some character of the same actress in some third party owned production  
**4:9**:  
while this suburb of Paris exists really, the mentioned boarding school is fictional  
**5:1**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Zoey's Tutor_!  
**5:2**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Quarantine_!  
**5:3**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _A Date For Quinn_!  
**5:4**:  
identifies Custodian Gordy from _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_ with maintenance man Buddha Bob from _Bigtime Rush_  
**5:5**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Defending Dustin_  
**5:6**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _School Dance_  
**5:7**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Defending Dustin_!  
**5:8**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Defensing Dustin_!  
**5:9**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Chase's Grandma_!  
**5:10**:  
cf. _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Getting Organized_!  
**5:11**:  
cf._Zoey 101_: _Chase's Grandma_!  
**5:12**:  
a cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Defending Dustin_ et alibi with a first name borrowed from the same actor's character in some third party owned production  
**5:13**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Defending Dustin_, identified with **Cleeshay** in _The iCarly Show_: _iFence_  
**5:14**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Defending Dustin_ with a first name borrowed from the same actor's character in some third-party owned production  
**5:15**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Robot Wars_  
**5:16**:  
concepts from _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Pranks_  
**5:17**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Little Beach Party_, identified with the same actress's cameo in _The iCarly Show_: _iGood-Bye_  
**5:18**:  
allusion to a marketing label for healthy diets run by the same actress  
**6:1**:  
guest from _Drake & Josh_: _Little Diva_  
**6:2**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Jet-X_  
**6:3**:  
identifies Mr. Fletcher from _Zoey 101_: _The Play_ with St. Troy from _Bucket & Skinner__'__s Epic Adventures_: _Epic Musical_.  
**6:4**:  
alluded to in _Zoey 101_: _Favor Chain_  
**6:5**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Chasing Zoey_  
**6:6**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _A Date For Quinn_!  
**6:7**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _A Date For Quinn_ with a surname borrowed from the same actor's character in some third-party owned production  
**7:1**:  
guest in _Drake & Josh_: _The Guitar_  
**7:2**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Blues Brothers_!  
**7:3**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _The Bet_!  
**7:4**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Spring Fling_, with a surname borrowed from the same actor's character in some third party owned production  
**7:5**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _The Great Vince Blake_ et alibi!  
**7:6**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Backpack_ for Zoey's aversion with respect to raisins!  
**7:7**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Car Wash_!  
**7:8**:  
cameo in _The iCarly Show_: _iBeat The Heat_, identified with same actor's anonymous guest rôle as a shrink in n_Zoey 101_: _Anger Management_  
**7:9**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Spring Fling_  
**7:10**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Bad Girl_  
**7:11**:  
cameo in _Drake & Josh_: _Little Diva_  
**7:12**:  
third-party owned songs by Drake Bell  
**8:1**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Backpack_ plasic tubes filled with some sweet and coloured goo  
**8:2**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Backpack_!  
**8:3**:  
cf. the _Wikipedia_ page about the banana!  
**8:4**:  
the journal's name is mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Broadcast Views_  
**8:5**:  
this identifies Mindy Crenshaw, a recurring in _Drake & Josh_, with the same actress's guest character in _Zoey 101_: _Backpack_  
**8:6**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Honor Council_  
**8:7**:  
this occasional character from _The iCarly Show_ is identified with the same actress's characters **Jacqueline Belle** from _Unfabulous_: _Gray Zone_ and **Sheela Voss** from _Shredderman Rules!_.  
**8:8**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Mean Teacher_  
**8:9**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Honor Council_  
**8:10**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Mindy Is Back_  
**8:11**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Backpack_  
**8:12**:  
mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Spring Breakup_!  
**8:13**:  
the name is stubed together from various characters of the same actor in various third-party owned productions  
**8:14**:  
various cameos in _The iCarly Show_  
**8:15**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Tiberius_!  
**9:1**:  
cameo in _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Revenge_  
**9:2**:  
Crony from _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_ is identified with **Olivary Biallo** from _Zoey 101_: _School Dance_ and with Marshal Rivera from _Star And Stella Save The World_  
**9:3**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Disk Golf_  
**9:4**:  
a guest character in _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Failing_  
**9:5**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Disk Golf_  
**9:6**:  
a multiple guest character in _Zoey 101_: _Coffee Cart Ban_ et alibi, with a surname borrowed from a character by the same actor in some third party owned production  
**9:7**:  
guest in _The iCarly Show_: _iPear Store_ with a surname borrowed from same actress's cameo in some third party owned production  
**9:8**:  
cf. _Apple's Secret Employee Training Manual_ by Gizmodo!  
**9:9**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _I Love Sushi_  
**9:10**:  
cf. _Victorious_: _How Trina Came In_!  
**9:11**:  
guest in _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Party_  
**9:12**:  
cameo in _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Pep Rallies_  
**9:13**:  
third party owneds song by David Glen Eisley, heard in _Spongebob Squarepants_: _Band Geeks_  
**10:1**:  
cameo from _Zoey 101_: _School Dance_ with a surname borrowed from same actor's character in some third-party owned production  
**10:2**:  
cameo from _Zoey 101_: _School Dance_ with a surname borrowed from same actor's character in some third-party owned production  
**10:3**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _School Dance_!  
**10:4**:  
third party owned song by Niki La Rosa played in _Zoey 101_: _School Dance_ and _Drake & Josh_: _Drake And Josh Go Hollywood_  
**10:5**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Little Beach Party_!  
**10:6**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Webcam_  
**10:7**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Haunted School_  
**10:8**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Chase's Girlfriend_!  
**10:9**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Zoey's Tutor_!  
**10:10**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _New Roomies_!  
**10:11**:  
vf. _Drake & Josh_: _Number One Fan_!  
**11:1**:  
cameo in _Drake & Josh_: _Paging Dr. Drake_  
**11:2**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iToe Fatcakes_  
**11:3**:  
anonymous guest in _Drake & Josh_: _Pilot_ with a name composed from several characters of the same actor in various third party owned productions; also identified with the same actor's anonymous cameo in 'ic: _iToe Fatcakes_  
**11:4**:  
this identifies Lola Martinez from _Zoey 101_ with Toru Vega from _Victorious_, but also with Tamara Tyson from _Spectacular!_, Shelby Marx from _The iCarly Show_: _iFight Shelby Marx_ and Vivian from _True Jackson VP_: _True Crush_  
**11:5**:  
This association with Cuba is inspired by the presence of a cameo character of the same name in third-party owned _Dirty Dancing II_.  
**11:6**:  
both cameo Tayler in _Unfabulous_: _The Picture_ and Vanessa in _Zoey 101_: _Quinn's Alpaca_  
**11:7**:  
Natasha Misa  
**11:8**:  
Camao Tasha from _The iCarly Show_: _iNevel_.

The surname is borrowed from the same actress's character in Disney-owned _JONAS_.

She is identified with an anonymous cameo of the same actress in _Unfabulous_: _The Grey Zone_  
**11:9**:  
guest character in _Zoey 101_: _Quarantine_  
**11:10**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Back At PCA_ et alibi  
**11:11**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _The Bet_  
**11:12**:  
mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Surprise_!  
**11:13**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Fake Roomie_!  
**12:1**:  
anonymous cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Hot Dean_ with a name parodising the actress's name  
**12:2**:  
identification of cameo cheerio Mandy from _Drake & Josh_: and unportrayed Mandy Franklin alias Makeout Mandy from _Zoey 101_: _Chasing Zoey_  
**12:3**:  
mentioned several times in _Drake & Josh_  
**12:4**:  
mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Miss PCA_  
**12:5**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Elections_  
**13:1**:  
this co-star of _The iCarly Show_ is identified here with **Melanie Puckett** — a guest from _The iCarly Show_: _iTwins_, **Trisha Kirby** — a guest from _Zoey 101_: _Bad Girl_, **Devin** — a guest star from _Bucket & Skinner__'__s Epic Adventures_: _Epic Prom_, **Christine Saunders** — co-star of _Best Player_, and **Fawn Leibowitz** — guest in _Victorious_: _Crazy Ponnie_  
**13:2**:  
mentioned in _The iCarly Show_: _iHate Sam's Boyfriend_  
**13:3**:  
guest in _The iCarly Show_: _iWas A Pageant Girl_  
**13:4**:  
mentioned in _The iCarly Show_: _iLook Alike_  
**13:5**:  
cameo in _Drake & Josh_: _Little Sibling_  
**13:6**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iMust Have Locker 248_!  
**13:7**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iTake On Dingo_!  
**13:8**:  
mentioned in _Michael Loves Lisa_  
**13:9**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Bad Girl_  
**14:1**:  
mebtioned in _Drake & Josh_: _The Battle Of Panthatar_ et alibi  
**14:2**:  
mentioned in _The iCarly Show_: _iStartA Fanwar_  
**14:3**:  
alludes to the role of the same actress as Wondergirl in third-party owned _Smallville_  
**14:4**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Mindy Loves Josh_  
**14:5**:  
in _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _popularity_, this is a pseudonym for Albert Wormenheimer  
**14:6**:  
the grandpa of Martin Fujanaga from _Supah Ninjas_  
**14:7**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iStake Out_  
**15:1**:  
cf. _Unfabulous_: _The Dark Side_!  
**15:2**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Haunted House_, identified with recurring character David Vega from _Victorious_ and guest character Mario from _The iCarly Show_: _iPie_  
**15:3**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Megan's New Teacher_!  
**15:4**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Haunted House_  
**15:5**:  
guest _The iCarly Show_: _iBelieve In Bigfoot_  
**15:6**:  
an anonymous cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Haunted House_, with a name meshed together from various characters by the same actress in various third party owned productions  
**15:7**:  
spoof off third-party owned show _Navy CIS_  
**16:1**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Chase's Girlfriend_ et alibi!  
**16:2**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iNevel_!  
**16:3**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Broadcast Views_, identified with guest Doug Toader from _The iCarly Show_: _iFence_  
**16:4**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Broadcast Views_  
**16:5**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Broadcast Views_  
**16:6**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Eric Punches Drake_  
**16:7**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Eric Punches Drake_  
**16:8**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Josh Is Done_  
**16:9**:  
cameo in _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Revenge_ et alibi  
**16:10**:  
guest character in _True Jackson VP_: _True's New Assistant_  
**16:11**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Favour Chain_  
**16:12**:  
spoof off third-party owned _Here Comes The Sun_ by _The Beatles_  
**16:13**:  
mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Favor Chain_  
**17:1**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Lola Likes Chase_  
**17:2**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Lola Likes Chase_; identified with Kate from _Drake & Josh_: _Megan's New Teacher_  
**17:3**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iNevel_!  
**17:4**:  
featured in _Zoey 101_: _Spring Breakup_  
**17:5**:  
item featured in _Zoey 101_:_The Curse Of PCA_  
**17:6**:  
both Rebeca from _Zoey 101_: _Surprise_ et alibi, and TTrina Vega from _Victorious_  
**17:7**:  
mentioned in _The iCarly Show_: _ihatch Chicks_  
**17:8**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _People Auction_  
**17:9**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Drippin' Episode_  
**17:10**:  
mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _Chasing Zoey_  
**17:11**:  
featured in _Zoey 101_: _Dinner For Two Many_  
**17:12**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: |citetitleiNote  
**17:13**:  
a recurring guest in _Victorious_ with a first name borrowed from some character of the same actress in some third party owned production  
**17:14**:  
cf. _Victorious_: _Wok Star_  
**18:1**:  
cameo in _Supah Ninjas_: _Komodo_  
**18:2**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Spring Breakup_ et alibi with a first name borrowed from the sae actor's character in some third party owned production  
**18:3**:  
unportrayed, mentioned in _Victorious_: _Rex Dies_, identified with unportrayed Jessica mentioned in _Drake & Josh_: _Drake And Josh Go Hollywood_  
**18:4**:  
featured in _Drake & Josh_: _Drake And Josh Go Hollywood_, while other branches of the same hotel are mentioned in other episodes throughout Schneider's works  
**18:5**:  
Warehouse featured in _Victorious_: _Wanko's Warehouse_  
**18:6**:  
cameo in _Drake & Josh_: _Drake And Josh Go Hollywood_  
**18:7**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Spring Breakup_  
**18:8**:  
Featured in _Zoey 101_: _Spring Breakup_  
**18:9**:  
mentioned _Zoey 101_: _Trading Places_ et alibi  
**18:10**:  
guest in _True Jackson VP_: _The Rival_  
**18:11**:  
guest in _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Break_  
**19:1**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Bad Girl_  
**19:2**:  
from _Quinn's Alpaca_  
**19:3**:  
cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Quinn's Alpaca_ with a first name borrowed from the same actress's character in some third party owned production  
**19:4**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Quinn Misses The Mark_  
**19:5**:  
Those animals are from _Drake & Josh_: _Sheep Thrills_.

The name of the zebra is taken from _Zoey 101_: _The Great Vince Blake_.  
**19:6**:  
cameo charater **Officer Carl** from _The iCarly Show_: _iWant More Viewers_, with a surname borrowed from the same actor's recurring character in third party owned production _Seventh Heaven_  
**19:7**:  
the pony is seen in _True Jackson VP_: _Keeping Tabs_  
**19:8**:  
from _Zoey 101_: _Quinn Misses The Mark_  
**19:9**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Peruvian Puff Pepper_  
**19:10**:  
guest in _The iCarly Show_: _iGood-Bye_  
**19:11**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _The Bet_  
**20:1**:  
guest character in _Zoey 101_: _Girls Will Be Boys_, with a surname borrowed from some third party owned character of the same actress  
**20:2**:  
hospital chain represented in _Drake & Josh_: _Paging Dr. Drake_ and _iSaw Him First_  
**20:3**:  
guest in _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Live_  
**20:4**:  
his olfactory senses are featured in _The iCarly Show_: _iNevel_  
**20:5**:  
third-party owned song by Drake Bell, featured in _Drake & Josh_: _Drake And Josh GoHollywood_  
**20:6**:  
spoof off third-party owned _Let Us Talk About The Birds And The Bees_ by Dean Martin  
**21:1**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iTake On Dingo_  
**21:2**:  
show mentioned in _The iCarly Show_: _iFix A Pop Star_  
**21:3**:  
multiple cameos in _The iCarly Show_  
**21:4**:  
cf. _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Woodshop_  
**21:5**:  
Lola mentions her existence in _Zoey 101_: _Surprise_  
**21:6**:  
guest in _The iCarly Show_: iFight Shelby Marx  
**21:7**:  
show mentioned in _The iCarly Show_: _iRock The Votes_  
**21:8**:  
featured in _Victorious_: _Birthweek Song_  
**21:9**:  
cf. _Unfabulous_: _The Girl Group_  
**21:10**:  
cf. _Unfabulous_: _The Song_  
**21:11**:  
identified with the same actress's anonymous cameo in _The iCarly Show_: _iLook Alike_. She is also the model for **Cadence Nash** from _The Troop_.  
**21:12**:  
cf. _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _School Newspaper_  
**21:13**:  
recurring churucter of _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_ with a first name borrowed from some character of the same actor in some third-party owne dproduction  
**21:14**:  
cf. _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Bullies_  
**21:15**:  
guest in _True Jackson VP_: _Keeping Tabs_  
**21:16**:  
featured occasionally in _Unfabulous_  
**21:17**:  
repeated cameo throughout _Unfabulous_, with a surname parodising the actor's full name  
**21:18**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Silver Hammers_ with a first name borrowed from same actor's rôle in some third-party owned production  
**22:1**:  
anonymous girl from _Zoey 101_: _Surprise_, identified with Stephanie from _The Last Day Of Summer_, and provided with a surname borrowed from some rôle of the same actree in some third-party owned production  
**22:2**:  
identifies cameo Robbie Carmichael from _Drake & Josh_: _Treehouse_ with Scooter from _Zoey 101_: _Favor Chain_.  
**22:3**:  
restaurant mentioned in _Bigtime Rush_: Big Time Beach  
**23:1**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Robot Wars_  
**23:2**:  
various cameos throughout _Unfabulous_  
**23:3**:  
cf. _Unfabulous_: _The Charity Case_  
**23:4**:  
guest in _The iCarly Show_: _iHeart Art_  
**23:5**:  
both guest Dale Squires from _Victorious_: _A Film By Dale Squires_ and Greg frm _Zoey 101_: _Michael Loves Lisa_ and cameo **Chad Finnegan** from _Unfabulous_: _Book Club_ et alibi  
**23:6**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _iSaw Him First_  
**23:7**:  
cf. _Unfabulous_: _The Drama_  
**23:8**:  
inspired by third-party owned song _Volare Cantare_ by Dean Martin  
**23:9**:  
cf. _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _School Play_  
**23:10**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iSaved Your Life_  
**24:1**:  
guest in _The iCarly Show_: _iLike Jake_, identified with James Garrett from fourth season _Zoey 101_, Dennifer fron _Zoey 101_: _Quarantine_, Zippy Brewster from _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_, and multiple anonymous characters by the same actor in _Drake & Josh_, _Unfabulous_, …  
**24:2**:  
guest in _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Sparks_ et alibi  
**24:3**:  
guest in _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Concert_, with a surname borrowed from the same actress's rôle in third-party production _Grey's Anatomy_  
**24:4**:  
cf. _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Extra Credits_  
**25:1**:  
cameo in _The iCarly Show_: _iThink They Kissed_ with a first name borrowed from the same actor's character in some third-party-owned production  
**25:2**:  
This kingdom is fictional.

However, there is a river in Brazil known by that name.  
**25:3**:  
this ham is mentioned in _The iCarly Show_: _iSaved Your Life_  
**25:4**:  
cf. _Victorious_: _Locked Up_  
**25:5**:  
guest in _The iCarly Show_: _iGood-Bye_  
**25:6**:  
guest from _True Jackson VP_: _True Royalty_  
**25:7**:  
anonymous cameo from _Drake & Josh_: _Battle Of Panthatar_

The credits name that character 'Toplin', while the context suggests that he's the little brother of guest character Thornton  
**25:8**:  
guest from _Drake & Josh_: _Battle Of Panthatar_  
**25:9**:  
location mentioned in _Zoey 101_: _The Great Vince Blake_  
**25:10**:  
guest character in _Zoey 101_: _The Great Vince Blake_  
**25:11**:  
cf. _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_: _Getting Organized_  
**25:12**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _The Great Vince_  
**25:13**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Football_  
**25:14**:  
identifies an unportrayed Dave mentioned _Zoey 101_: _The Play_ with cameo character Workout Dave from _Zoey 101_: _Chasing Zoey_  
**25:15**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _The Great Vince Blake_  
**26:1**:  
suggested by _The iCarly Show_: _iBeat The Heat_  
**26:2**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Silver Hammers_  
**26:3**:  
cf. title song of _Unfabulous_ by Emma Roberts!  
**26:4**:  
inspired by third-party owned song _Toma La Luna_ by Eros Ramazzotti  
**26:5**:  
inspired by third-party owned song _Eternal Flame_ by Bangles  
**27:1**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iSpy A Mean Teacher_ et alibi!  
**27:2**:  
guest in _The iCarly Show_: _iWant To Stay With Spencer_ et alibi  
**27:3**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _The Curse Of PCA_  
**27:4**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _The Curse Of PCA_ with a surname borrowed from some character of the sane actor in some third-party production

also identified with same actor's anonymous cameo in _The iCarly Show_: _iPromote Techfoots_  
**27:5**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Number One Fan_  
**28:1**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iBelieve In Bigfoot_!  
**28:2**:  
cf. _Drake & Josh_: _Alien Invasion_!  
**28:3**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iGo To Japan_  
**28:4**:  
allusion to third-party owned song _Through The Desert On A Horse Without Name_  
**28:5**:  
Mr. Galloway from _Drake & Josh_: _Two Idiots And A Baby_  
**28:6**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Little Beach party_  
**28:7**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iStage An Intervention_  
**28:8**:  
guest in _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Life_  
**28:9**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iPie_  
**28:10**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Wrestling_  
**28:11**:  
both Duke from _The iCarly Show_: _iHatch Chicks_ and Blatzberg from _Zoey 101_: _Wrestling_  
**28:12**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Wrestling_  
**29:1**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Wrestling_  
**29:2**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Wrestling_  
**29:3**:  
cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Wrestling_ with a family name borrowed from the same actor's character in third-party production _Glee_  
**29:4**:  
guest character Juan from _The iCarly Show_: _iFight Shelby Marx_  
**29:5**:  
anonymous cameo from _Zoey 101_: _Wrestling_ and _The iCarly Show_: _iGot Detention_

the name is a spoof off the actor's name  
**29:6**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iGive Away A Car_!  
**29:7**:  
guest in _Zoey 101_: _Zoey's Balloon_ and _Zoey 101_: _Michael Loves Lisa_  
**29:8**:  
cf. _Bigtime Rush_: _Big Time Moms_  
**29:9**:  
cf. _Unfabulous_: _The Little Sister_  
**29:10**:  
mentioned somewhere in season one or 2 of _Unfabulous_  
**29:11**:  
cameo in _Zoey 101_: _Chase's Grandma_  
**29:12**:  
cf. _The iCarly Show_: _iStart A Fanwar_  
**29:13**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Hot Dean_  
**30:1**:  
cf. _Unfabulous_: _The Rhinoceros In The Middle Of The Room_  
**30:2**:  
guest in _Drake & Josh_: _The Great Doheny_  
**30:3**:  
cf. _Zoey 101_: _Favor Chain_!  
**30:4**:  
guest in _Victorious_: _Beck's Big Break_  
**30:5**:  
occasional cameo in _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_  
**30:6**:  
indpired by third-party owned song _Sounds Of Silence_ by Simon and Garfunkel  
**30:7**:  
inspired by third-party owned song _Ghost Riders In The Sky_ by Johnny Cash 


End file.
